IMPROVING NONVERBAL SKILLS AND READING BODY LANGUAGE

Nonverbal Communication

What is Nonverbal Communication and Body Language

“A natural, unconscious language that broadcasts our true feelings and intentions in any given moment and clues us in to the feelings and intentions of those around us.”

Types of Nonverbal Communication

Facial ExpressionShowing emotions by making faces; universal across cultures

PostureThe way a person sits, walks, stands, or holds his head affect our views of him.

GesturesUsing our hands to communicate; can be different across cultures.

Eye ContactMaintains flow of conversation and shows interest, affection, agitation.

VoiceTone; not what you say but how you say it

TouchHand shake, pat on the back, hug

SpacePersonal Bubble

Why Nonverbal Communication is Important

Nonverbal communication makes up 93% of communication

• The way you listen, look, move, and react tells the other person if you care, if you’re being truthful, and how well you’re listening.

Scenarios

Jack gets along with his colleagues at work, but not with those who matter most to him. If you were to ask them why, they would say that Jack is “too intense.” Rather than look at you, he devours you with his eyes. And if he takes your hand, he lunges to get it and then squeezes so hard it hurts. Jack is a caring guy but has a terrible time being in sync with people. This awkwardness limits his ability to advance at work. He just isn’t seen as being good with others.

Scenarios

Arlene is attractive and has no problem meeting eligible men. Keeping them is the problem! Arlene is funny and interesting, but even though she constantly laughs and smiles, she radiates tension. Arlene’s shoulders and eyebrows are noticeably raised, her voice is shrill, and her body is stiff. Being around Arlene makes many people feel uncomfortable. Arlene has a lot going for her that is undercut by the discomfort she evokes in others.

Scenarios

Ted thought he had found the perfect match when he met Sharon, but Sharon isn’t so sure. Ted is very eligible. He is good looking, hardworking, and a smooth talker. The trouble is that Ted seems to talk more to himself than to Sharon. When Sharon has something to say, Ted is ready with a reply before she finishes her thought. This makes Sharon feel ignored, and she has started to date other men. Ted loses out at work for the same reason. His inability to listen to others makes him unpopular with many of the people he most admires.

Reading Nonverbal Communication

Pay Attention to Inconsistencies

Reading Nonverbal Communication

Look at nonverbal communication signals as a group: Do not isolate nonverbal signals when trying to read

them. Taken as a whole, decide if the nonverbal cues are

consistent with what they say.

Reading Nonverbal Communication

Trust your Instinct: Don’t dismiss your gut feeling. If you feel like someone is misleading you, don’t

overlook it.