Interpersonal Communicatio

nDiyah Ayu Amalia Avina M.Si

• Reciprocal message processing : when two or more individuals mutually take account of and adjust to one another’s verbal or non verbal behaviour

Interpersonal communication = Reciprocal message processing

Interpersonal communication

Interpersonal communication include a messages that occur between two, interdependent persons;

IPC messages are offered to initiate, define, maintain, or further a relationship.Interpersonal communication is more than just saying a polite hello to the salesclerk in our favorite department store and then scurrying away never to be seen again. Instead, it refers both to the content and quality of messages relayed and the possibility of further relationship development

<http://www.sagepub.com/upm-data/4984_Dainton_Chapter_3.pdf>

RelationshipRelationship : Way of talking

about friendship

Specific

May involve emotional or sexual

intimacy

General concept

One to one social unit ; Ex :

Parent and child, employer employee, doctor – patient, teacher –

student etc

Interpersonal Communication from

psychological perspective Related with :

which is who you are and what you bring to the interaction.

Your needs, desires, values, personality, etc., all form the psychological context

(note : "You" here refers to both participants in the interaction.)

Principe of Interpersonal

communicationSource :

Donnel King http://www.pstcc.edu/facstaff/dking/interpr.htm

Principe of Interpersonal Communication

inescapable

Irreversible

Complicated

Contextual

• We can't not communicate.

• Everything is communication – verbal or non verbal

• Remember a basic principle of communication in general: people are not mind readers. Another way to put this is: people judge you by your behavior, not your intent.

inescapable

• You can't really take back something once it has been said.

• A Russian proverb says, "Once a word goes out of your mouth, you can never swallow it again."

irreversible

• Theorists note that whenever we communicate there are really at least six "people" involved:• 1) who you think you are; • 2) who you think the other person is; • 3) who you think the other person thinks you

are;• 4) who the other person thinks /she is;• 5) who the other person thinks you are; and• 6) who the other person thinks you think s/he

is.

Interpersonal communication is complicated

• Psychological context, • Relational context• Situational context• Environmental context• Cultural context

Interpersonal communication is contextual

• which is who you are and what you bring to the interaction.

• Your needs, desires, values, personality, etc., all form the psychological context. ("You" here refers to both participants in the interaction.)

Psychological context,

• , which concerns your reactions to the other person--the "mix."

Relational context

• deals with the psychosocial "where" you are communicating. An interaction that takes place in a classroom will be very different from one that takes place in a bar.

Situational context

• deals with the physical "where" you are communicating. Furniture, location, noise level, temperature, season, time of day, all are examples of factors in the environmental context.

Environmental context

• includes all the learned behaviors and rules that affect the interaction.

• If you come from a culture (foreign or within your own country) where it is considered rude to make long, direct eye contact, you will out of politeness avoid eye contact.

• If the other person comes from a culture where long, direct eye contact signals trustworthiness, then we have in the cultural context a basis for misunderstanding.

Cultural context

Interpersonal AttractionDiyah Ayu Amalia Avina M.Si

What is attraction?

anything that draws two or more people together

characterized by affection, respect, liking, or love

("Interpersonal attraction," 2010).

major factors that influence interpersonal attraction

Propinquity / Proximity Similarity

Physical attractivenes

s

Responsiveness and

reciprocal liking

Competence Reward

Stress (Low) self esteem

Social isolation

http://www.personal.psu.edu/bfr3/blogs/applied_social_psychology/2011/12/interpersonal-attraction-what-matters-first.html ;

Propinquity / proximity

physical or psychological proximity between people

Ex : people who works in a same division and same floor has a similarity in nature.

Propinquity / proximity

The propinquity effect : the tendency for people to form friendships or romantic relationships with those whom they encounter often, forming a bond between subject and friend.

Types of propinquity

Industry/Occupational Propinquity

in which similar people working in the same field or job tend to be

attracted to one another.

Residential Propinquity,

in which people living in the same area or within neighborhoods of

each other tend to come together

Acquaintance

Propinquity,

a form of proximity in existence when friends tend to have a special bond of interpersonal

attraction.

"virtual propinquity" to work on virtual

relationships where people are connected

virtually

Similarity

People tend to choose and feel comfortable if life or stand around people who have similarity with them

Value, attitude, beliefs, social class, religion, ideology etc –> depend on their preference

Physical attractivenessIt’s hard to explore .. sympathy

PA stereotype :

- People who has a physical attractiveness has a good/ better ability - Beautiful : more successful and happier- Tall and big = natural born leader - Berscheid, E., & Walster, E., Physical Attractiveness. In L. Berkowitz (ed., ) Advances in Experimental Social Psychology. Vol. 7, 1974. Exerpts

attractive children and adults are treated more favourably than unattractive children and adults (e.g. Langlois et al., 2000)

Similarity..(2)

Theories which related with similarity

Cognitive Consistency (Fritz Heider)

Reinforcement and behaviourism (Bryne, 1971)

• People prefer to be consistent because it’s easier to understand – safe

• Someone wanted to have a similarity with the people they like / adore to make cognitive consistency

Teori Cognitive Consistency (Fritz Heider)

• Atraction and similarity has a linear correlation.

• Basic perception : similarity = rewards ; different = awful/ bad idea

• Ex :Moslem sisterhood in other countries

Reinforcement and behaviorism (Bryne, 1971)

Responsiveness and reciprocal liking

we like those who are responsive to us and we like those who like us

Emotional Pressure (stress)

People in stressful condition needs other people

Anxiety producing situations -- emotional presure produce need of love/atention (Schachter, 1959)

Ex : a stressful student need support from his/her friends sorority / sisterhood

(Low) self esteem

People who have low self esteem tend to easier to accept affiliation ( such as : love, care, etc )

Social Isolation Human is a social

creature When people has

isolated, increasing the probability of like others

The Gain-Loss Theory or model of interpersonal attraction is concerned with the effect that a sequence of positive, negative, or positive and negative evaluations about a person may have about that person's attraction to the person or persons making those evaluations.

For example, when giving feedback to individuals on how they have performed on a task, is it better to start with what they have done well or what they need to improve?

http://knowledge.sagepub.com/view/humanrelationships/n237.xml

Competence Who is he / he? How

is their competencies ?

People tend to believe someone else who has competencies of what he said

Ex = doctor – patient

rewards What did you get if

you “pay attention” to somebody ?

Positive or abandon negative feelings

Effect of Interpersonal Attraction toward interpersonal

communication

• Rational and emotional judgment

Perception of communicate

• effective ; communicator and communicate has a similar perception

Communication effectiveness

Classification of

Interpersonal Communicatio

nDiyah Ayu Amalia Avina M.Si

Dyadic and triadic

relationship

Task and social

relationship

Duration :Short and long

term relationship

Casual and intimate

relationship

Dating, love and marital relationship

• Dyads = two person unit spouse,

• Triads = three person relationship six possibilities message process pairing

• A and B ; A and C ; B and C ; A+B with C ; A+C with B B ; B+C with A

Dyadic and triadic relationship

• Relationship based on Purpose of coordination action

• personally ------ social oriented goal

• Ex : teacher – student ; taxi driver – passenger

Task and social relationship

• Short term vs long term • Low investment high investment• Little history lengthy history• Identities negotiable identity

fixed

Duration :Short and long term relationship

• Based on “depth” or intimacy level

• Acquantance --- casual relationship ---intimates

Casual and intimate relationship

Dating, love and marital relationship

Relational Patterns

Diyah Ayu Amalia Avina M.Si

Relational patterns Supportive and

defensive climate

Dependencies and Counter

dependencies

Progressive and regresive

spirals

Self – fulfilling and self- defeating

Prophecies

Relational patterns

• The orientation of individuals within relationships and their patterns of communicating with one another create the climate of communication. Climates and individual behaviors can be characterized along a continuum from highly supportive and highly defensive.

Supportive and defensive climate

Defensive Climate isthe climate in which conflict is managed is important. Dyads should avoid a defensive climate, which is characterized by these qualities:

• judging and criticizing other group members.

Evaluation:

• imposing the will of one group member on the others.

Control:

• using hidden agendas.

Strategy:

• demonstrating indifference and lack of commitment.

Neutrality:

• expressing dominance.

Superiority:

• being rigid in one’s willingness to listen to others.

Certainty:

Supportive climate individuals should

foster a supportive climate, marked by these traits:

• presenting ideas or opinions.

Description:

• focusing attention on the task.

Problem orientation:

• communicating openly and honestly.

Spontaneity:

• understanding another person’s thoughts.

Empathy:

• asking for opinions.

Equality:

• expressing a willingness to listen other the ideas of others.

Provisionalism:

Relational patterns

• Dependency relationship = one of individual of relationship who is highly dependent on another for support, money, job, leadership, or guidance

• Ex : husband dependent on wife ; always agree

• Counter dependent in contrast -- disagrees

Dependencies and Counter dependencies

Relational patterns • “In a spiral, one partner’s behavior intensifies that of the other”.

Progressive and regresive spirals

Progressive : in which one partner’s behavior leads to increasing levels of satisfaction for the other. In progressive spirals, the reciprocal messages processing if the interactions leads lo a sense of “positiveness”in the expriences.

Regressive :, where one partner’s communication leads to increasing dissatisfaction. Stopping regressive spirals from getting out of control depends on the open communication between the two individuals. In these circumstances-regressive spirals there is increasing discomfort, distances, frustation, and dissatifaction for everyone involved.

Relational patterns

Self – fulfilling and self- defeating Prophecies

Factor that influence pattern

Stage of relationship

and context

Interpersonal needs

and styles

power Conflict

• The nature of interpersonal patterns also varies depending on the context in which conversation is taking place.

• Together, these two factors account for much of the variation on the patterns of communication within relationship.

1. Stage of Relationship and Context

• Often noted as especially important in this way are the interpersoal needs fection, inclusion, and control.

• We each develop our own specific needs relative to control, affection, and inclusion, as we do in other areas.

• Interpersonal style also plays a key role in shaping the communication patterns that emerge in relationships.

Interpersonal Needs and Styles

• Interpersonal communication within relationships is also shaped by the distribution of power.

• Where one individual is employed by the other, for instance, the relationship is asymmetrical, or uneven, in terms of the actual power each has in the job situation.

3. Power

• The presence of conflict—“anincompatibility of interest between two or more people giving rise to struggles between them”—can have a major impact on communication dynamics.

Conflict

three general communication

strategies used in conflict resolution:

Passive-indirect methods. Avoiding the

conflict –producing situation and people

Distributive methods. Maximizing one’s own gain and the other’s

losses

Integrative methods. Achieving mutually

positive outcomes for both individuals and

the relationship