interpersonal communication (final)

INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION

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Process of sending and receiving information between two or more peopleTypes of Interpersonal Communication

• Dyadic communication (two people)• Public speaking• Small-group communication

Basic elementsCommunication channels

• Direct channels: obvious, under control of sender• Verbal (spoken or written) or Non-verbal (colour,

sound, controlled body movements)• Indirect channels: recognized subliminally,

subconsciously, not under direct control of the sender• Body Language

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INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION: WHAT FOR?• Gaining Information about other individual

• For interacting more effectively• Better prediction about how they think, feel, and act• How? Passively (by observing them), Actively (having

others engage them) or Interactively (engaging them ourselves)

• Better Understanding others• Words can mean very different things depending on how

they are said or in what context• What and how are sent simultaneously, and both affect

the meaning• Establishing Identity

• Roles we play and public self-image we present• Interpersonal Needs

• Inclusion, Control and Affection

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INTERPERSONAL CONFLICT

Expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from the other party in achieving their goalsImportant concepts in definition:

• The two sides must communicate about the problem• Often involves perceptions

Common Problems:• Avoiding conflict: damaging, greater problems in the future• Individuals blaming other individuals• Adopting a win-lose strategy

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We are going to explicitly work on

• Effective Listening• “You have two ears and

one mouth. I suggest that you use them in that proportion”

• Assertiveness• “Too many of us fail to

fulfill our needs because we say no rather than yes, or perhaps later in life, yes when we should say no”

• Effective Questioning• “Only the crystal-clear

question yields a transparent answer”

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EFFECTIVE LISTENING: ACTIVE LISTENING

Communication = Speaking & Listening = good speaking and effective listening skillsDifference between Hearing & Listening?Effective Listening Tips

• Make an effort to block out outer distractions. • Resist the urge to day dream. • Try to understand and correctly interprete body language.• Pay attention to tone also, as it is vital to the correct

interpretation of the message. • Have an open mind. Try not to make judgments about the

speaker or the message. • Don't hesitate to ask and clarify (do not interrupt, jot

questions down)• Big mistake: being preoccupied on what you want to say.

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ASSERTIVE COMMUNICATIONAppropriately direct communication, open and honest, and clarifies one’s needs to the other personNatural to some, but skill that can be learnedGreatly reduces the level of interpersonal conflict, reducing a major source of stressFeatures of assertive people:

• assume the best about others and respect themselves, • think “win-win” and try to compromise

In contrast, individuals behaving aggressively• tend to employ disrespectful, manipulative or abusive tactics• make negative assumptions about motives of others• don’t think of the other person’s point of view at all• win at the expense of others, and• create unnecessary conflict

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EFFECTIVE QUESTIONING TECHNIQUES

Open Questions (what, why, how): long answers

• Developing an open conversation

• Finding our more detail• Finding out the other

person's opinion or issues

Close Questions: short answers, yes or no.

• For Gathering facts, testing your understanding or the other person's

• Concluding a discussion or making a decision

• Frame setting• Misplaced closed question:

kill the conversation, awkward silences

Funnel Questions• Start with general questions, then

focus on a point in each answer, and ask more and more detail at each level

• Tip: start with closed questions and progress to open ones

Good for:• Finding out more detail about a

specific point• Gaining the interest or increasing

the confidence of the person you are with

Rhetorical Questions• An answer is not expected, they

are statements phrased in question form

• For engaging the listener

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EFFECTIVE QUESTIONING TECHNIQUES

Probing Questions• Strategy for finding

out more detail• Tip: ask ‘Why?’ And

use ‘exactly’.

Good for:• Gaining clarification

to ensure you have the whole story and that you understand it thoroughly

• Drawing information out of people who are trying to avoid telling you something

Leading Questions• That will lead the

respondent in your way of thinking

• To be used with care• Can be seen as

manipulative and dishonest

How:• Phrasing the question so

that the "easiest" response is yes

• Adding personal appeal to agree

• Choice between fixed options

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EFFECTIVE QUESTIONING T IPS FOR …Learning: Ask

open and closed

questions, and use probing questioning

Relationship building: Ask

about what they do or enquire about their opinions. In

affirmative way, ask for opinionsManaging and

coaching: Rhetorical and leading questions.

Help reflect and commit to suggested

courses of actionAvoiding misunderstandings: Use probing questions to seek

clarification, particularly when the consequences are

significant

De-fusing a heated situation: Calm a colleague by using funnel questions to get them to go into more detail about their grievance

Persuading people: Open

questions will help others to embrace the reasons behind your point of view

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According to Petersen (2007), good communication is just as

important in business, family, and social life. Listening well

matters for coworkers, when intimacy is not the goal, but being

able to work together effectively is. It helps keep friendships vital

and even makes a difference in casual relationships where you

merely want ease (p. 4).

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Stewart (2009) defines interpersonal communication as the type or kind

of communication that happens when the people involved talk and

listen in ways that maximize the presence of the personal (p. 33).

In the information age, we have to send, receive, and process huge

numbers of messages every day. But effective communication is about

more than just exchanging information. Effective communication

requires you to also understand the emotion behind the information.

Elements of Interpersonal Communication

The Communicators• one-way process

• two-way processesThe Message

facial expressions, tone of voice, gestures and body languageNoisecomplicated jargon, inappropriate body language, inattention, disinterest, and cultural differences

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Feedback

Feedback consists of messages the receiver returns, which

allows the sender to know how accurately the message has

been received, as well as the receiver's reaction.

Context

All communication is influenced by the context in which it

takes place.

Channel

The channel refers to the physical means by which the

message is transferred from one person to another

Four Principles of Interpersonal Communication

Remember a basic principle of communication in general: people are not mind readers. Another way to put this is: people judge you by your behavior, not your intent.

Interpersonal communication is inescapable

Interpersonal communication is irreversible

A Russian proverb says, "Once a word goes out of your mouth, you can never swallow it again."

Interpersonal communication is complicated

No form of communication is simple. Because of the number of variables involved, even simple requests are extremely complex.

Interpersonal communication is contextualCommunication does not happen in isolation

Psychological context, which is who you are and what you bring to the interaction. Your needs, desires, values, personality, etc., all form the psychological context. ("You" here refers to both participants in the interaction.)

Relational context, which concerns your reactions to the other person--the "mix."Situational context deals with the psycho-social "where" you are communicating. An interaction that takes place in a classroom will be very different from one that takes place in a bar.

Environmental context deals with the physical "where" you are communicating. Furniture, location, noise level, temperature, season, time of day, all are examples of factors in the environmental context.Cultural context includes all the learned behaviors and rules that affect the interaction. If you come from a culture (foreign or within your own country) where it is considered rude to make long, direct eye contact, you will out of politeness avoid eye contact

Importance of Interpersonal Communication Skills

Listening is a vital interpersonal communication skillGood interpersonal communication skills enable us to work more effectively in groups and teamsInterpersonal communication skills are essential to developing other key life skills

WHAT IS INTERPERSONAL SKILLS?

WHAT IS INTERPERSONAL SKILLS?

All about working with other peopleAn ability to get along with others while performing the jobCharacteristic traits like Manners, attitude, courtesy,

habits, behavior and appearance which helps us to

communicate and maintain relationship with others

ORGANIZATIONAL CONTEXT

The organizational context

of how interpersonal skills are

used can be shown by the vast

number of interpersonal

interactions

INTERPERSONAL SKILLS WHILE WORKING

Take the relationship viewpoint:

• Effective relationships within the organization

• Effective relationships with suppliers

• Effective relationships with competitors


Internally• In Teams

• Across Teams

• Within and between

departments and

business units


Externally

•With

Suppliers

•With

Customers


To gain real competitive advantage through such

relationships in the long term is dependent upon

your level of interpersonal skills

WHY INTERPERSONAL SKILLS NEEDED?

• To Improve:Relationship Productivity

Working Environment

All Round Success

Leadership Skills

Liking by Others

INTERPERSONAL SKILLS MODEL

Interpersonal Skills

Personality

Development

Leadership Skills

WHEN & WHERE INTERPERSONAL SKILLS ARE

REQUIRED AT WORK PLACE ?

While working in

groups to form effective

teams

Socializing at work

place

Presenting your self at

work

Listening &

Questioning

Giving or receiving

feedback

Building &

maintaining

relationships

TIPS TO IMPROVE INTERPERSONAL SKILLS

Smile

Be Appreciative

Pay Attention

Practice Active Listening

Bring People Together

Resolve Conflicts

Communicate Clearly

Humor Them

Empathy/See It On Their Side

interpersonal communication (final)

Education