Interpersonal ConflictWimot & Hocker

Chapter overviewWhy study conflict? Definition of conflictScares resourcesPersonal historyThree categorize of family conflict

behaviors The Lens model

Why study conflict? “The study of conflict is a basic human requirement and the practice of constructive conflict is an essential set of interpersonal skills.”Conflict can help maintain and understand one’s own interpersonal relationships

Conflict defined Conflict is an expressed struggle between two or more interdependent parties. Conflict has perceived incongruent goalsConflict can be a struggle for scares resources In conflict, individuals perceive other as a road bock to attain their own goals.

Examples of scares recourses

MoneyTimeAffectionAttention

Personal History"History never repeats itself ,as most people fear. People usually repeat history.“ – Divine Chikobvu

How a person deals with history can be tied to their own families history with conflict

The three categorize of family origin

Avoidant families Collaborative families Aggressive families

Rules of an Avoidant family

Family doesn’t recognize conflictWalks away when conflict arises Doesn’t allow expressions of strong feelingsDoesn’t acknowledge struggle

Rules of Collaborative families

Have family meetings or meal time discussions Say openly what they are feelingParents help resolve children’s conflictsStrong feelings are normal and allowed

Rules of Aggressive Families

Survival of the fittest describes the general climateBe brutally honest regardless of impact People who don’t engage are weak Have an audience present when you engage someone

The Lens Model of conflict

Conflict can be viewed like lenses through glasses.The fundamental aspects in the lens model are 1) communication behaviors 2) the perceptions of those behaviors Individuals may have different perspectives of the same behaviors. Each person may have a different view of…

OneselfThe other personThe relationship

Two people in conflict can have different

perspectives on the same conflict

Notice how the two characters perceive the odds differently http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KX5jNnDMfxA

Bibliography Hocker, Joyce. Wilmot, William. “ Interpersonal Conflict”. McGrawHill. Boston. 2007.