invictanewsletter~june 2014
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ÂTRANSCRIPT
Harley Owners Group ®
The views and comments contained in this Newsletter are the personal views of the contributors and are not necessarily those expressed by the Editor, Invicta Chapter UK, HOG UK, Harley-Davidson or their authorised dealers or agents.
INVICTA NEWS
June 2014
OFFICIAL NEWSLETTER OF INVICTA CHAPTER UK
INVICTA IN AMERICA
Invicta Chapter UK, Harley Owners Group #9141 founded 1991
Itjackdawgreat guide
The Editor’s Column
Last month the legendary
Jackdaw quiz was hosted by
Eric the Landlord, with the
following results: in third
place were The Whitehead
Wonders (Nicky and Dave
Whitehead, Andy Hill and
John and Jenny Burden),
second place went to
Pilcher’s Professors (Gary
and Val Pilcher with John
and Mary Felgate) and
although the lead changed
several times, the winners
were Proudlock’s
Phenomenons, (Colin
Proudlock, Debbie and
Derek Mardell and Chris
(Mr. Ed) Thomson – wonder
why this got such big
coverage!
Can I ask everybody to
consider submitting
contributions for
inclusion in the
Newsletter, single
photos are just as
welcome as batches
from major Invicta
events.
If I can’t always get them in
the current issue, they will
eventually appear.
So send in your articles,
photos and blackmail for
inclusion in the Newsletter,
to:
I’m still surprised at how
few ‘blackmail’ photos have
arrived, if I keep
prompting, more might
appear……
By the time you read this,
the lucky group which went
to America will have
returned, so watch for
photos in future editions.
Now, once again please
look at the Events Page on
the inside back cover –
there are still lots of events
going on and blank Sundays
are rapidly being filled by
impromptu rideouts.
I now have my twin pipes
fitted and they are now
adorned with their gorgeous
fishtails, but… I’m still
having trouble getting loud
pipes - don’t know why? I’m
still baffled!
Chris Thomson
EDITOR
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2013–2014 Invicta Chapter UK Committee
Director Past Director Treasurer
Ian Martin John Felgate Gill Whibley
[email protected] [email protected] [email protected]
01622 890598 01622 884429 01622 730626
Assistant Director ‘A’ Assistant Director ‘B’ Assistant Director ‘C’
Karen Melhuish Colin Proudlock Graham Chambers
[email protected] [email protected] [email protected]
01634 305037 / 07758 400055 01304 613117 01634 828436
Events Officer Ladies of Harley Secretary/Membership
Andy Hill Amanda Harding Darren & Diana Boyce
01304 202072
07590 463616
01795 429032
Editor Head Road Captain Webmaster
Awaiting New Appointment – if you think you can do it,
please contact a committee member.
Chris Thomson Lawrence ‘Rocky’ Whibley [email protected]
01304 812731
01622 730626
Hotmail and Events Team – Non Committee Members
Nicky Whitehead Simon Williams Val Pilcher
Contact with the committee must be by email or telephone NOT Facebook or Twitter
HarryDealership Manager
DougMotorcycle Sales Advisor
AndyMotorcycle Sales Advisor
JoeMotorcycle Sales Advisor
SoniaMotorcycle Sales Admin
DaveMaster Technician
MickTechnician
GrubsTechnician
PeterService Advisor
RichardParts & Accessories Advisor
JoeParts & Accessories Advisor
MaryMotorClothes® Specialist
CarolMotorClothes® Supervisor
EllieMotorClothes® Advisor
SarahMotorClothes® Advisor
Maidstone Harley-Davidson®
Forstal Road | Aylesford | Kent | ME20 7XA
01622 711680
www.mshd.co.uk
Meet The Team At Maidstone Harley-Davidson®
Reports
Director’s Dialogue
June 2014
As our Director is roughing it in the good ol’ US of A at the moment, he has
advised me that it is unlikely he will be able to get anything to the Newsletter before we go to print, so I shall add a few items which I hope he will endorse
on his return:
• Check out the events on the inside back cover
• Make sure you have registered your bike for the Chapter Challenge
• Are there any volunteers for the position of Webmaster?
And just a reminder of roughly where he is…….
It’s a hard life, but someone has to do it.
I know from my Route 66 trip that they will be having a fantastic time, I’m jealous, cant wait to go back.
Ride Safe, both sides of the pond.
Mr Ed. pp Ian Martin (Director)
Reports
The Tilting Files.
Assistant Director ‘C’ – Graham Chambers
More rambling’s from West Kent…
We are certainly flying through the year? You look back and think, where have
the last few months gone!! By the time you read this everyone will be back from the USA trip, and by the Face Book entries they have had a great time –
certainly looking forward to reading some of the write-ups.
The fish and chip run to Leysdown went off well - the evening was dry, a bit on the cold side, but we had a good turnout. The good old “Dancing Dog” didn’t
let us down, nothing like a nice pint after fish and chips or even a good cup of splosh as Rod always calls it.
I didn’t get to the “Cider Rally” this year; owing to the fact that we were
invited to the tenth anniversary of the FX rally in France, (where did those ten
years go? Sue and Paul Thomas laid on a brilliant weekend, with a nice meal for everyone (about 50 in total) at the local village hotel on the Friday night,
where we consumed a few bottles of red wine!!! Paul did an excellent ride on
the Saturday to a Prehistoric Park (I expect you remember it from new?)at a
place called Samara. The weather was hot and sunny so had a lovely stroll
round and saw the various old crafts in action, even found a Scotsman who was the resident blacksmith, before taking a leisurely ride home with Obzie
leading the way, and we just happened to find a nice French Saturday market and a good little ‘Tabac’ for a nice coffee; the owner was dressed and looked
like Billy Holiday hence he chose to serve us himself.
That evening Sue had laid on a band called the “The Bushman Brothers” and boy could the guy play that electric guitar!!I think he had been a sessions
player for some top groups as he did seem to be friends with a few top artists. It was nice meeting up with some of the original French bikers that we have
got to know over the ten years and they are always so pleased to see us, even
if the language barrier is a bit difficult, but we still got our point over often with Sue’s help I must add. An excellent night ending up with us walking back to
the hotel well after midnight, so we will definitely be drummed out of the Ovaltinee’s?
On the Sunday we rode down to the Obzie’s farm cottage in the Somme and
had two beautiful sunny days just chilling out with a bit of lawn cutting in-between the aperitifs!!!! - A couple of lovely evening meals which always seem
so much better in France, especially with all their lovely cheeses.
(Contd.)
Reports
I got in touch with Stormin on our return to see how the Cider Rally went and
they all seemed to have had a great time – loved the sun glasses guys and gals, and I understand Paul Ouzman did a brilliant ride out for you all – he is
so good at that, we should use him more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
Lord Hanmore has been Skypeing me whilst they were travelling around the U S of A; and they seemed to be having a great time with plenty of good riding,
but it seems that the TILT Club has gained a few more member’s!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will have to make an International section? I did try to Skype him a couple of
times, but the times were all wrong? I didn’t think he would appreciate a phone call at 2.00 o’clock in the morning.
We had a fantastic ride out to Dungeness for a fish and chip lunch at the Pilot
in May; the weather was just what the doctor ordered. I had just had some
new pipes fitted and they are now nice and loud!!!, so much so Carol made me push the bike out of the close in the morning just in case the neighbours
were having a lie in. There was a slight mix up over orders in the pub for fish and chips and Stormin got his first where normally he moans because they
either forget his order or it comes up half hour late so he was gloating! But Paul and I were waiting for ours and at one point we only had two pickle
onions between us, they were looking quite good and we thought we were going to have to share them if nothing came up. A big thanks to Cory and
Scott for a brilliant ride, apart from some cyclists who didn’t think the traffic laws applied to them and nearly had me off, we had an excellent day. We
followed Paul and Trudy home and as always Paul did a nice ride through the Sussex country side, but he did pass a few nice tea shops –I will have to have
a word with him about that. I still have to remember that I have now moved, as I go sailing on merrily, with Carol chewing toffees on the back, I find myself
having to suddenly deviate through Paddock Wood, to get home!! (I put it
down to old age?)
It seems that our Simon, of Hot Mail fame!! Has a new pub near Godstone on the old A25, so the club has wasted no time in getting a ride down there to try
the beer and food…. Will let you know next month how it went? Might be a nice ride for a 5th Wednesday in the month!!
Well, that’s enough from me although I have the “One Day Ride” to do this
month; last year I lost my key to the bike lock on the way home, so Paul reckons I cannot be trusted to get home on my own so we are joining him for
a night in Somerset visiting Trudy’s dad plus it Paul’s 50th birthday (he’s looking quite good for 50!!!) – Let’s hope the weather is better than last year.
Ride Safe
Tilt
Reports
Assistant Director ‘A’ – Karen Melhuish
Dear Invicta friends,
The Cider Rally was a huge success, although I was unable to go on my bike I
went in the car with Marty, he enjoyed it and says he wants to go again next
year. We drank and ate too much and enjoyed all the dressing up, a fair few
pictures were shared on Facebook.
Bad news about my bike it’s the ECU, it’s being worked on as we speak and I
hope it won’t be long until I am out on the road again, and I hate to think how
much lighter my bank balance will be afterwards but it’s got to be fixed, it took
a while for them to diagnose the problem (this is why I say I don’t want to talk
about it) it’s not me being rude it’s just my heart keeps having a bit of sinking
feeling when its mentioned.
I have seen that all rides are underway I have to admit to being a bit upset
about not getting out as much as I would like. I have even found myself
looking at new and different bikes but decided I still love the one I have… I just
need to get her mended.
Still no decision has been made about our venue, I have a couple of options to
look at pubs with plenty of parking and good food on offer, room enough for us
to all be together in the bar. I am waiting for all to come back from America,
Val is going to come and have a look at a place with me to see what we think
of it. Location is also important we have decided it’s got to be close to
Maidstone and surrounding areas.
Apologies for my absence at meets recently but work has had to be a priority
we have had a fair bit going on, I have had very little time to enjoy myself of
late but hopefully this will improve soon.
Oh well, see you all soon. That’s enough from me except have fun and I will
update you on any events for the Pippin if we decide to stay there.
Love and kisses, stay safe.
Karen X
Reports
The Incredible Shrinking Man
Well the weather is improving and I hope even better weather to look forward to.
Chris and I had a ride out to Warrs followed by MSHD on the way home, great
day out.
I hope all you lucky lot that went on the USA trip had a fantastic time.
The photos that I have seen look great. Also those going to Croatia ride safe and have a great time.
Please note that the BBQ at the Jackdaw has had its date changed due
to another event there - it is now 27th August - hope to see you
there ON YOUR BIKES, weather permitting.
Trees and I along with other club friends had a great weekend at the Cider
Rally, we really recommend that one for next years diary.
That's all from me. Keep safe out there.
Colin.
Events
Andy’s Almanac This month started with the new members ride out, which I hope was dry, and well attended, also up to the high standard of the ones that I have managed to be part of this year. Just to highlight one a few weeks ago, that went down to Dungeness, the drop off system works! The ride out was very much separated by horses, tractors, then a cycle race. I thought I would do the buddy riding bit, so slowed down, but then was forcefully told to get off the road to make way for these lycra clad cyclists. As it was a nice sunny day, thought I might as well pull over, ‘don’t they make a noise when passing in a group’. With all of this the Rideout was now completely split but it just shows how this system works. Well done every one having the confidence in the drop off and thanks Cory for planning the route, excellent day out. Recently we held a meeting for those off to Croatia next week, and in going through some of the things we tend to forget when travelling in Europe. Like check your E111 make sure it is in date, and your passport, (we have had members turn up with passport out of date, ‘Christine’ or no passport ‘Stuart’) remember this is a free service from the government but there are individuals out there that will charge you for doing the registration for you, don’t be conned its free! The other trips across the channel The Big Bulge & RTTW are almost to the point of being complete, but if you do have second thoughts and do want to go, you need to talk to me now!
Sunday 8th sees us going down to Eastbourne to the Lions Club, at the Western lawns motorcycle show. On Thursday 19th in the evening is British Bike Night at the Wagon & Horses Faversham Road which is always very well attended and most worth while.
Saturday 21st Midsummer’s day is the Longest Days Ride from Lowestoft to Lands End visiting dealerships on the way, now if you want to be part of this talk to Paul Ouzman as he is leading the Rideout. You will also need to book accommodation and get up before dawn in the most easterly town in the UK, Lowestoft. At the end of this month on the Sunday 29th we had planned a Rideout to the dock yard at Portsmouth, HMS Victory, HMS Warrior, and the Mary Rose etc. On speaking with the dock yard they have some problem for this date so we intend now to reschedule this into next year. Bob Angel is planning a big event here; which will be a fantastic day out, maybe the whole week end. So sorry if you were looking forward to this Rideout but if it comes off what Bob is working on it will be worth the wait.
Events
There will be a ride out now to the Fort at Newhaven the pretty way to replace this so keep an eye on your Hot Mail & ear on the Hot Line !
Fancy a ride in the evening? Then keep the last Thursday of the month free. From the dealership, and organised by them, is a Rideout up to the Ace café, this leaves around 18-00hrs and it is not just for Harleys.
Looking forward and onto the end of July, fancy a camping rally then Ron & Linda Hodgson both ex-committee members of Invicta invite you to the Not Forgotten Rally at Bradford-Upon -Avon 25th>27th July . Ron is the founder member and president of the All Arms Veterans which is an excellent club, I know they will offer Invicta members a very warm welcome. Its £10-00 Prebooked and £15-00 on the gate, contact Dixie on 07875034909 SAE to Not Forgotten Rally 2014, 74 The Green, Lydd, Kent. TN29 9HA
How do you fancy being an Iron HOG® Rider http://ironhog.wordpress.com/about/ this is what Marjorie Rae, has recently completed, being the first LOH to do so. She was with some of others calling into our dealership a few weeks back, where we welcomed them and then wished them on their way.
There are just 3 rules to this:-
1. Within 48 hours visit as many mainland UK H-D dealerships as you can, gaining 30 minutes per dealership visited added to the allowed completion time.
2. You must start and finish at the same H-D dealership.
3. You must visit these four dealerships: Edinburgh, Swansea, Maidstone and Plymouth.
So far we have 3 Amigos’ who are making plans, to start on the first Monday in July, they are Nigel Burnes, Marcus Sutton & Kevin Bradford, so if you want to join the hard butts, speak with them.
Andy Hill
Events Officer
Members Trades and Services
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Members Trades and Services
ONLY £25.00 TO PROMOTE YOUR BUSINESS / SERVICE / PRODUCT IN THE NEXT 12
EDITIONS OF INVICTA NEWS ~ PLEASE SEND YOUR ADVERTISEMENT & CHEQUE TO:
Gill Whibley (Treasurer) 117 Spot Lane, Bearsted, Maidstone, Kent. ME15 8UB
CLUB NIGHT ANCLUB NIGHT ANCLUB NIGHT ANCLUB NIGHT AND AREA MEET VENUESD AREA MEET VENUESD AREA MEET VENUESD AREA MEET VENUES
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Club Night Venue
Charing Clubhouse
Arthur Baker Playing Field
The Moat
Charing
Ashford
Kent Meet held on
TN27 0JJ 1st Weds of the month
North Kent Area Meet Venue
The Pippin
London Road
Maidstone
Kent
ME16 0DR Meet held on
3rd Weds of the month
West Kent Area Meet Venue
The Brookers Oast
The Hop Farm
Beltring
Paddock Wood
Tonbridge
Kent Meet held on
TN12 6PY 2nd Weds of the month
East Kent Area Meet Venue
The Jackdaw
Denton
Canterbury
Kent
CT4 6QZ Meet held on
4th Weds of the month
Miscellaneous
New MembersNew MembersNew MembersNew Members
Invicta Chapter UK would like to extend a very warm welcome to the
following New Members:
Happy BirthdayHappy BirthdayHappy BirthdayHappy Birthday
John Allen Graham Batchelor Joe Barrows Graham Chambers Patricia Cooke Neil Clayton Sharon Cox John Felgate Mary Felgate John French Mick Gell Dave Hanna Sharon Lane Chris Leavey Tony Mangili Debbie Mardell Paul McSweeney Corey Mills Lorna Morrison Peter Mullaney Paul Ouzman Marty Pearce Colin Proudlock Peter Thomas
Sharon Ward
Lots this month!!
New Members This Month
Ian Spellar Debbie Presland
Please speak to any committee member if you require any help or assistance.
LOCK UP YOUR SHEEP! RALLY MAG South East Region presents
LOCK UP YOUR SHEEP! RALLY
IT’S BAA-ACK AGAIN BY POPULAR DEMAND!
SEPTEMBER 5th-7th 2014Middle Farm – on the A27 at Firle
nr Lewes, East Sussex BN8 6LJ Live Bands + DJ * Licensed Bar * Silly Games
Custom & Classic bike show * Middle Farm cider! (Middle Farm hosts the National Collection of Cider and Perry)
Tickets: £15 in advance / £20 on the gateDay tickets: £10 / Cars: £5 (blue badge holders free)
More info available from
Ann – 07954 138437 or Mitch – 07855 111946 email [email protected].
Ticket ordering available online (+ Paypal fee) via tinyurl.com/sheeprally2 or by post from: MAG Lock Up Your Sheep Rally, c/o 191 Vale Road, Seaford BN25 3HH.
Cheques payable to Uckfield MAG. Pre-book closes 5th August.
All proceeds go to aid MAG defend Riders’ Rights.
PART DEUXPART DEUX
Reports
Hello everyone,
I’m sorry I missed the last newsletter, I was away on a jolly in Holland with good friends. And we had good weather all the way with not a sign of the
freezing temperatures and snow of last year. It was sun all weekend, which was a plus for April.
New members night went with a bang and, I would also like to say a big
‘Thank You’ to Maidstone HD for donating raffle prizes, and a big ‘Thank You’ to all who brought raffle tickets we raised £116.00. I have still got my thinking
cap on and will be looking at ideas on how we can raise money for our charities, so any ideas are welcome. Please have a chat with me, and I can get
things rolling.
We have seen some great ride outs already this year and so many more to go.
Corey had his first ride out as Road Captain to the Pilot at Dungeness on Sunday. I finally got there to get my fish and chips. Unfortunately I was not
able to join the ride but still had a pleasant ride on my own.
I’m getting ready for a new adventure to the Europium HOG Rally. And this year I’m not going to be the one who gets the fine for the most luggage, I can
still hear Val’s voice when we turned up at the services last year. And this year I will be one of the road marshals helping there and back.
Dom has been attending SOFER meetings to find a venue for next year, so
things are looking up. Hopefully we will find out more soon.
Frank is now getting a very big and yes he does the Harley High Five. He looks forward to meeting you all very soon.
Thanks for reading, hope to see you all soon!
Love and Kisses Mandy x
And a Harley high five from Frank x
New Members Night
New Members Night
Reports
Getting to know you …
Member Name : Chris (‘Mr. Ed’) Thomson
What was your first bike Lambretta Ld 150cc
What is your current Harley Heritage Softail
How long a H.O.G. member Since 2004
How long an Invicta member Since 2007
How long have you been riding 1963
Were you a mod or rocker Mod!!
What is your nickname Lots! But ‘Mr. Ed’ in Invicta.
How many times have you come off 4 (3 on Scooters!)
How many motorcycle related points have you had
0
What was your best ride Route 66
What was your worst ride In the rain, coming home from an Invicta rideout to
Bletchley Park.
What’s the best modification/extra on your bike
My fishtails!
Additional Information:
First met an Invicta member (Andy Hill) back in the 60’s, when he was a
rocker and I was a mod – interesting discussion, but we’re both still alive!
Cider Rally~2014
Chapter Challenge
Have you rHave you rHave you rHave you registeregisteregisteregisteredededed your bike for this years your bike for this years your bike for this years your bike for this years
Chapter Mileage Challenge!Chapter Mileage Challenge!Chapter Mileage Challenge!Chapter Mileage Challenge!
Sorry to nag, but it seems there are sSorry to nag, but it seems there are sSorry to nag, but it seems there are sSorry to nag, but it seems there are still lots of you till lots of you till lots of you till lots of you not registered not registered not registered not registered –––– it only takes a minute. it only takes a minute. it only takes a minute. it only takes a minute.
ItItItIt’’’’s not too late, ss not too late, ss not too late, ss not too late, speak to Mary or Peter at the peak to Mary or Peter at the peak to Mary or Peter at the peak to Mary or Peter at the
Dealership.Dealership.Dealership.Dealership.
2013 – 14 Invicta Road Captains
Lawrence Whibley
HRC
John Blandford
Graham Bliss
Graham Chambers
John Felgate
Mary Felgate
Dave Hanna
Dom Harding
Andy Hill
Mags Ivatts
Des Larner
Norman Ouzman
Brian Boorman
Nick Ovenden
Jim Whitson
Corey Mills
Brian Hanmore
If you are already a
Road Marshall,
consider upgrading to
Road Captain –
please speak to the
HRC
Paul Ouzman
Scott Montgomery
2013 – 14 Invicta Road Marshalls
Gary Pilcher
John Robinson
Amanda Harding
Paul Hillier
Simon Williams
This could be you
Have you thought
of improving your
riding skills and
becoming a Road
Marshall – please
talk to the HRC
This could be you
Calendar
EVENTS DIARYEVENTS DIARYEVENTS DIARYEVENTS DIARY ---- Lots Going On!Lots Going On!Lots Going On!Lots Going On!
June 2014
1 Sun NEW MEMBERS RIDEOUT – More details later Closed
4 Wed Club Night, Charing, TN27 0JJ Closed
6 Fri Ride Skills Day at Brands Hatch Open
8 Sun Bike Show, Eastbourne Lions Club, Western Lawn Open
8 – 15 Sun - Sun Euro Rally, Biograd, Croatia. Open
11 Wed West Kent Area Meet, The Brookers Oast, Paddock Wood, TN12 6PY Open
18 Wed North Kent Area Meet, The Pippin, Maidstone, ME16 0DR Open
19-22 Thur / Sun Magic Bike Week, Rudesheim, Germany. Open
21 Sat Longest Day Ride with Paul Ouzman Open
25 Wed East Kent Area Meet, - MILITARY NIGHT - The Jackdaw, Denton, CT4 6QZ Open
26 Thur Ace Café from the Dealership, time to be advised. Open
29 Sun Portsmouth Dockyard with Andy Hill - POSTPONED Open
30 Mon Training Day at Brands Hatch. Open
July 2014
2 Wed Club Night, Charing, TN27 0JJ Closed
4 Fri INDEPENDENCE DAY PARTY at Dealership – Bands, Bar-B-Q Open
6 Sun Ace Café at Brooklands Open
9 Wed West Kent Area Meet, The Brookers Oast, Paddock Wood, TN12 6PY Open
13 Sun Beaulieu Ride – Details later. Open
16 Wed North Kent Area Meet, The Pippin, Maidstone, ME16 0DR Open
20 Sun Damn Yankee American Car Club, North Weald Airfield, Essex. Open
23 Wed East Kent Area Meet, The Jackdaw, Denton, CT4 6QZ Open
26 Sat SUMMER BASH at Dealership, Music, Trade Stands, Food. Open
27 Sun Bexhill Motor Fest. Open
31 – 3 Thur - Sun Ardennes Big Bulge Dodgy Tour Closed
August 2014
31-3 Thur-Sun Big Bulge Dodgy Tour, Ardennes Closed
6 Wed Club Night, Charing, TN27 0JJ Closed
13 Wed West Kent Area Meet, The Brookers Oast, Paddock Wood, TN12 6PY Open
20 Wed North Kent Area Meet, The Pippin, Maidstone, ME16 0DR Open
27 Wed BIG BAR-B-Q East Kent Area Meet, The Jackdaw, Canterbury CT4 6QZ Open
Key To H.O.G. Terminology
Closed Event ~ Those Chapter events which are open to Chapter
members and one guest per member
Open Event ~ Those Chapter events which are open to Chapter
members, international H.O.G. members and other
guests as desired
Member Events ~ Events only open to H.O.G. members
***** Remember, to participate in Invicta Chapter Closed ***** ***** Events, you must keep your H.O.G. and Invicta *****
***** Chapter memberships current. *****
The Last Word
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IMPORT, INCOME, INDUSTRY, LOAN, LOSS, MARKET, MERCHANT,
MONEY, NETWORK, PAYMENT, PROFIT, PURCHASE, RETURN, SALES, SELL, SERVICES, SHARES, STOCK, TRADE, TRANSACTION.
A farmer named Paddy had a bad car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company. In court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Paddy. 'Didn't you say to the police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?' asked the solicitor. Paddy responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I'd just loaded my fav'rit cow, Bessie, into da... ' 'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?' Paddy said, 'Well, I'd just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin' down da road.... ' The solicitor interrupted again and said, 'Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client for damages for injuries. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question. 'By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Paddy's answer and said to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie'. Paddy thanked the Judge and proceeded. 'Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my fav'rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin' her down de road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side. I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin' and groanin'. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans. Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin' and groanin' too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes. Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, 'How are you feelin'?' 'Now, wot da hell would you say?'
MEDIUM SUDOKU Fill in the grid so that every column, row and
3x3 box contains the digits 1 to 9 only once.
I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ...... but she left me before we met.
John Felgate