IOP Section 3: Be Proactive

Review of Last Week0 What did you learn about the patterns of mental health,

physical health and substance abuse issues in your family?0 People who feel crappy –due to physical problems or mental

health issues – are more likely to develop addictions as a way to try and feel better

0 Many people who come from addicted families learn that substances are a way to cope, instead of developing good coping skills.

0 What 2 things did you identify that you could do to help yourself feel better?0 Why/how do they help you feel better?0 What changes do you notice in yourself when you do those

things?

Be Proactive

0Take initiative by realizing that your decisions (and how they align with your values and principles) are the primary determining factor for happiness in your life.

0Take responsibility for your choices and the subsequent consequences that follow.

Activity0Addicted vs. Sober

0 Make 2 columns on your paper/white board0 Label one “Addicted” and the other “Sober”0 Spend 5 minutes brainstorming characteristics of the “ideal

addict.”0 Spend 5 minutes brainstorming characteristics of the “ideal

sober person.”0 Compare and contrast the two.

0Which is easier? Better?0Which type of person would you rather be around and why?0Now identify which characteristics of each you currently have

*Remember that sobriety is a way of life, not just being clean

Defining Values and Principles

0Honesty (Head-Heart-Gut)0 With Self 0 With Others0 What decisions have you made in the past 6 months

which related toward honesty with yourself or others?0 How does dishonesty serve as a relapse trigger?

0Hope0 Belief that things can get better0 What has happened or what have you done to increase

your hope and positive outlook?

0 Faith0 In self

0 I have faith that I _______________________0 In others

0Who do you have faith in? Why?0 In Good Orderly Direction

0What is Good Orderly Direction

0 Compassion/Brotherly Love0 Toward others you do not know0 To help deal with resentment/anger

0Courage0 What does courage mean to you?0 What do you do to build up your courage?0 What things have you done this week that have required

courage?0How did they turn out?0How did you feel afterward?

0 What things did you avoid because you were afraid?0What were you afraid of?0How could you deal with this next time?

0Discipline and Consistency0 What do they mean to you?0 What is the difference between discipline and

motivation?0 How do you help yourself stay disciplined/motivated?

Taking Responsibility0For Choices and Actions

0 Make informed, thoughtful choices0 Think before you act

0Addicts are impulsive. Sober people choose long-term goals over immediate gratification

0 What is one choice or decision you made this week that was impulsive or just plain wrong? How did you feel about it? What did you do next?

0 What is one choice or decision you made this week that was positive? How did you feel about it?

Responsibility cont…

0For Feelings0 Start with “I feel” or “I felt,” not “You made me feel…”0 Anger/Anxiety/Depression are feelings that tell us to do

something0 You have the ability to evaluate the feeling to determine

if it is worth the energy0 You have the ability to do something to change the

situation or your feelings about the situation

In Practice

0How did each of the following decisions align with your values and principles, and impact your happiness? 0 You decided to come to group today0 You decided to go to work0 You decided not to use0 You decided not to get upset at the slow cashier and the

long line.

Homework

0Review your Addicted vs. Sober worksheet0Circle each characteristic you want to change (i.e.

being manipulative, impulsive, undependable etc.)0List three (3) ways you could change each

0 Example: 0Manipulative: Put other people’s feelings first, _____________,

_____________0 Impulsive: Decide to think things over before saying yes or

no, _______________, _______________0Undependable: Keep calendar and review each morning,

_______________, ______________