lancaster county 50plus life february 2016
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50plus LIFE — formerly 50plus Senior News — is a monthly publication for and about Central Pennsylvania’s baby boomers and seniors, offering information on entertainment, travel, healthy living, financial matters, veterans issues, local happenings, profiles, and much more.TRANSCRIPT
Complimentary | Lancaster County Edition | February 2016 • Vol. 22 No. 2
Finding LovE AFtEr 50page 22
Natural ProtectioN for Your Heartpage 20
2 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
Building Trust. Reducing Stress. Delivering Reliability. Around The World.
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peace • love • smilepeace • love • smile
Sylvia says: Don’t sweat it out looking for the right place to live. Come to Colonial Lodge
and see for yourself our independent living apartments and personal care home.
Come and see why Sylvia and many others call us home.
To schedule a tour, please call:717-336-5501 x-309 or
800-406-2273www.coloniallodgepa.com2015 North Reading Road, Denver, PA 17517
Is This Thing On?
Tips for Safely Shopping Online
You can’t see or touch the merchandise, so what makes online shopping so appealing?
Well, the following three aspects, for starters:
1. Comforts of Home: You don’t need to leave your home (or office) to shop. Therefore, no parking hassles, no waiting in long lines, and no fighting for the last iPhone on the shelf.
2. Global Access: Stores all over the world are at your fingertips.
3. Savings: Online retailers save on personnel and other overhead costs. They often pass the savings on to you.
Start with the Familiar Get your feet wet with a visit to the
website of a “brick-and mortar” store you frequent in your area. If you shop at Home Depot, visit their website: www.homedepot.com. Is Macy’s one of your shopping spots? Visit www.macys.com.
Or you could pop into the website of a catalog that you patronize. Perhaps you are a Crate & Barrel (www.crateandbarrel.com) fan or a Harriet Carter (www.harrietcarter.com) loyalist.
Be On the Lookout If, at any time, you see a customer-
service number, jot it down. Websites are notorious for
concealing their contact numbers. For reasons of cost, most sites prefer all correspondence to be by email. I may be old fashioned, but when I have a complaint or question, I’d like the option to speak to a human being.
If you return to the website seeking out their telephone number,
look for Contact Us, Customer Service, or About Us. Scroll to the bottom of the page. Sometimes, what you seek (and they hide) is in very small letters at the end of the webpage.
Satisfaction & Safety Guaranteed To ensure that your credit card
information is safe, most websites encrypt the page where you enter your credit card, making it safer for transmission. You’ll know the page is protected when http at the start of the website address has an added s (https) for security.
A closed padlock might appear at the bottom of the browser window. An open padlock or a broken key at the bottom of the window indicates you are not on an encrypted page.
Abby Stokes
please see TIPS page 5
www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 3
Coins & CurrEnCySteinmetz Coins & Currency, Inc.350 Centerville Road, Lancaster(717) 299-1211
dEntAL sErviCEsAmerican Dental Solutions 221 Rohrerstown Road, Lancaster (717) 293-7822
Dental Health Associates951 Rohrerstown Road, Lancaster(717) 394-9231
Lancaster Denture Center951 Rohrerstown Road, Lancaster(717) 394-3773Smoketown Family Dentistry 2433 C Old Philadelphia Pike Smoketown (717) 556-8239
EmErgEnCy numbErsCentral PA Poison Center(800) 521-6110
Office of Aging(717) 299-7979 or (800) 801-3070
EmpLoymEntLancaster County Office of Aging(717) 299-7979
EntErtAinmEntDutch Apple Dinner Theatre510 Centerville Road, Lancaster(717) 898-1900
EyE CArE sErviCEsCampus Eye Center 2108 Harrisburg Pike, Suite 100 Lancaster (717) 544-3900222 Willow Valley Lakes Drive Suite 1800, Willow Street (717) 464-4333
FinAnCiAL sErviCEsInternal Revenue Service(717) 291-1994
U.S. Financial (800) 595-1925, ext. 2122
gAstroEntEroLogyRegional Gastroenterology Associates of Lancaster (RGAL)2104 Harrisburg Pike, Lancaster694 Good Drive, Suite 23, Lancaster4140 Oregon Pike, Ephrata(717) 544-3400
HEALtH & mEdiCAL sErviCEsAlzheimer’s Association(717) 651-5020
American Cancer Society(717) 397-3744
American Diabetes Association (888) DIABETES
American Heart Association(717) 393-0725
American Lung Association(717) 397-5203 or (800) LungUSA
American Red Cross(717) 299-5561
Arthritis Foundation(717) 397-6271
Consumer Information(888) 878-3256
CONTACT Helpline(717) 652-4400
Disease and Health Risk(888) 232-3228
Domestic Violence(800) 799-7233
Flu or Influenza(888) 232-3228
Vein Center of Lancaster 90 Good Drive, Suite 301, Lancaster (717) 394-5401 HEAring sErviCEsAdvanced Tech Hearing Aid Centers Lancaster: (717) 560-5023New Holland: (717) 355-6035
Pennsylvania Office for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing(800) 233-3008 V/TTY
HomE CArE sErviCEsConnections at Home VIA Willow Valley (717) 299-6941
Independent Living Services (866) 837-4235
MediQuest Staffing (717) 560-5160
Seniors Helping Seniors (717) 208-6850
Visiting Angels Living Assistance ServicesHanover: (717) 630-0067Lancaster: (717) 393-3450York: (717) 751-2488
HomE improvEmEntHaldeman Mechanical Inc. 1148 Old Line Road, Manheim (717) 665-6910
Bath Fitter/Kitchen Saver(877) 922-2250
HousingEastwood Village Homes, LLC102 Summers Drive, Lancaster(717) 397-3138
Marietta Senior Apartments601 E. Market St., Marietta(717) 735-9590
insurAnCEMedicare(800) 633-4227
mEdiCAL EquipmEnt & suppLiEsHinkles Pharmacy 261 Locust St., Columbia(717) 684-2551
Medical Supply(800) 777-6647
nutritionMeals on Wheels (717) 392-4842
pHArmACiEsCVS/pharmacywww.cvs.com
pHysiCiAnsMay•Grant Obstetrics & GynecologyWomen & Babies Hospital with other locations in Brownstown, Columbia, Elizabethtown, Willow Street, and Intercourse(717) 397-8177
rEAL EstAtEPrudential Homesale Services GroupRocky Welkowitz(717) 393-0100
rEtirEmEnt CommunitiEsColonial Lodge Community2015 N. Reading Road, Denver(717) 336-5501
sEnior movE mAnAgEmEntArmstrong Relocation Services 1074 E. Main St., Mt. Joy (717) 492-4155
TLC Ladies(717) 228-8764
Transition Solutions for SeniorsRocky Welkowitz(717) 615-6507
trAvELAAA Central Penn(717) 657-2244
Conestoga Tours (717) 569-1111
Passport Information(877) 487-2778
vEtErAns sErviCEsLebanon VA Medical Center1700 S. Lincoln Ave., Lebanon(717) 228-6000 or (800) 409-8771
Helpful numbers, hotlines, and local businesses and organizations eager to serve you—all just a phone call away.
Not an all-inclusive list of advertisers in your area.
At Your Fingertips
4 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
COrPOrATE OFFICE3912 Abel Drive, Columbia, PA 17512
Phone 717.285.1350 • Fax 717.285.1360Chester County:
610.675.6240Cumberland County/Dauphin County:
717.770.0140Berks County/Lancaster County/Lebanon County/York County:
717.285.1350E-mail address: [email protected]
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Christianne RuppEditor, 50plus Publications
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50plus LIFE is published by On-Line Publishers, Inc. and is distributed monthly among senior centers, retirement communities, banks, grocers, libraries and other outlets serving
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Love is one of the most com-mon reasons why we collect objects or hand down objects.
Objects come with emotions. Most people will not part with a particular item or group of items if they were handed down or amassed by a loved one, family member, or friend.
I feel this way about my father’s nutcracker collection and my mother’s canister set. I wouldn’t part with them no matter what!
And when someone stops collecting or is no longer able to collect, sometimes the collection is handed down.
If you can retain a col-lection for the long term, historically, that collection will increase in value over time. So, hold on to the collection if you can.
And, add to the collection when you can and start to famil-iarize yourself with the collection by learning about its history and market value.
For many, the love of collect-ing is not only commonplace, but also comforting. At other times, a collection can be a burden and present new problems. When a collection comes to you from a deceased loved one, the situation may prove difficult.
For instance, when Frank, a longtime collector of duck decoys, passed away, his collection be-came the property and project of his widow.
Like most widows of collec-tors, Irene was happy that Frank enjoyed the process of collecting
throughout their marriage. Now, with no children or interested relatives to take over the collec-tion, Irene is left in a quandary.
She doesn’t want the duck decoys. Reason No. 1 is that she can’t bear to display the duck decoys as they prompt heartache. The emotional collection reminds Irene of Frank’s passing.
Reason No. 2 is the over-whelming number of duck decoys
now stacked in the basement. Also, the vast collection is un-
familiar to Irene, a non-collector. She can’t identify the decoys’ sculptors, she can’t identify the regional characteristics of each decoy, and she is uninformed and at the mercy of anyone with in-formation about decoys and their market value. She knows these buyers may take advantage of her.
She realizes that auctions may not be the best place to sell the collection because Frank got many of his best decoy bargains by buying at auctions. If a buyer at an auction is getting a bargain, then the person selling the decoy at auction must have lost money on the transaction.
Since Irene can’t tell one wood-en duck from another, she begins to worry. She doesn’t like the idea
of having strangers come into the house to make her an offer on the decoys.
She doesn’t know what a good offer looks like, either. If someone wants to make a killing on this collection and buy it for a song, she is in a vulnerable position.
Now, Irene doesn’t know how or if she should get into the mar-ket, and she doesn’t want to keep the collection. Like many other
families of collec-tors, Irene never thought she’d be left alone with this vast collection.
Tips for this common col-lecting problem include choos-ing one or two favorite decoys to keep as a remem-brance in honor of Frank’s years of collecting.
Get an apprais-al from an ap-praiser who does
not have any financial interest in the decoys—doesn’t want to sell them, doesn’t want to buy them. Be prepared to pay that appraiser for their expertise and time.
Ask the appraiser to tell you the retail value of the decoy col-lection, not an auction value or insurance value of the collection.
Take some time to consider the market information and then make a decision about how you will act. Don’t be hasty. Get infor-mation so you can make a good decision.
Celebrity Ph.D. antiques appraiser, author, and former museum direc-tor, Dr. Lori hosts antiques appraisal events worldwide. Dr. Lori is the star appraiser on Discovery channel. Visit www.DrLoriV.com/Events, www.Fa-cebook.com/DoctorLori, or call (888) 431-1010.
A vast collection of duck decoys becomes a late collector’s passion and his widow’s problem.
Art & Antiques by Dr. Lori
Loving Our CollectionsLori Verderame
www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 5
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If the unfortunate happens and someone abuses your credit card (and, remember, the Internet may not have even played a role in the event), under federal law your liability is limited to $50.
If a breach of security on the part of the website revealed your credit card information, the website should pay this amount for you.
The American Bar Association has an informative website: www.safeshopping.org. (Note: It is .org, not .com.) Visit their site for more information before you start shopping on the Internet.
If something happens that warrants you bringing in the big guns, contact the Better Business Bureau at www.bbbonline.org. You could also fill out a complaint form with the Federal Trade Commission at www.ftc.gov. Type “complaint” in the internal search engine.
You Are in Control If a website is really confusing or
poorly designed, feel free to abandon
the mission at any time. In most cases, you can find the same item being sold on several different websites.
No one can save you from your own bad shopping habits, online or otherwise. Step away from the mouse when considering the 1980s sweater that glows under black lights. It wasn’t a good idea back then, and it certainly isn’t a good idea now.
Do you really need another circular saw? Aren’t two enough? Yes, I know it was a great deal, but stand firm. The convenience of the Internet can definitely feed the impulse shopper in all of us.
Practice restraint and enjoy your purchases!
Abby Stokes, author of “Is This Thing On?” A Friendly Guide to Everything Digital for Newbies, Technophobes, and the Kicking & Screaming and its companion website, AskAbbyStokes.com, is the Johnny Appleseed of Technology, singlehandedly helping more than 300,000 people cross the digital divide.
TIPS from page 2
When you patronize our
advertisers, please let them know you saw
their ad in
6 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
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Savvy Senior
How to Protect Your Eyes from Macular Degeneration
Dear Savvy Senior,Is macular degeneration hereditary?
My mother lost her vision from it before she died a few years ago, and now at age 65, I’m worried I may get it. What can you tell me?
– Nearsighted Susan
Dear Susan,Having a parent or sibling with
macular degeneration does indeed increase your risk three to four times.
But the good news is there are things you can do to protect your eyesight and a number of treatments that are available if you do happen to get it. Here’s what you should know.
What is AMD?
Macular degeneration, also known as age-related macular degeneration (or AMD), is the most common cause of vision loss in people over age 50, affecting about 10 million Americans.
AMD is a progressive eye disease that damages the macula, the part of the eye that allows us to see objects clearly, causing vision loss in the center of your vision. This affects the ability to read, drive, watch television, and do routine, daily tasks, but it does not cause total blindness.
There are two types of AMD: wet and dry. Dry AMD, which affects about 90 percent of all people who have it, progresses slowly and painlessly over a period of years, while wet AMD is much more aggressive and can cause severe vision loss in a matter of weeks or months.
Factors that can increase your risk of getting AMD include age (60 and older); smoking; excessive exposure
to sunlight, especially if you have light-colored eyes; certain genetic components; a family history of AMD; high blood pressure; obesity; and being Caucasian.
For anyone over the age of 60, it’s a smart idea to get your eyes examined by an ophthalmologist every year. They can spot early signs of AMD before vision loss occurs.
Early signs, however, may include shadowy areas in your central vision or unusually fuzzy or distorted vision. The Amsler grid (www.
amslergrid.org) is a good tool to check your eyes for AMD.
Preventing AMD
While there’s currently no cure for AMD, there are some things you can do if you’re
high risk. One option is to talk to your
doctor about taking a daily dose of antioxidant vitamins and minerals known as AREDS: vitamins C and E, plus copper, lutein, zeaxanthin, and zinc. Studies by the National Eye Institute have shown that AREDS can reduce the risk by about 25 percent that dry AMD will progress.
Most drugstores sell these eye supplements in tablet or soft gel form over the counter for around $20 to $30, but be aware that not all eye supplements contain the proper formulation. Choose either the PreserVision Eye Vitamin AREDS Formula, PreserVision Eye Vitamin Lutein Formula, PreserVision AREDS2 Formula, or ICAPS AREDS. These four options contain the right formula mix.
Other lifestyle adjustments that may help prevent or delay AMD
Jim Miller
February is Age-Related Macular Degeneration Month
www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 7
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include eating antioxidant-rich foods, such as dark-green, leafy vegetables and cold-water fish for their omega-3 fatty acids; protecting your eyes from the sun by wearing UV-protective sunglasses; controlling high blood pressure; exercising regularly; and if you smoke, quit.
Wet AMD TreatmentsFor wet AMD, there are several
effective medications (Lucentis, Avastin, and Eylea) available that can stop vision loss and may even restore it. These medications are given by injection into the eye and repeated
every month or two, perhaps indefinitely.
Note that each of these three drugs works equally in treating wet AMD, but there’s a big cost difference. Avastin costs just $50 per month, compared with $2,000 for the other two. So experts recommend Avastin as the first choice for most people with wet AMD, especially if you don’t have supplemental Medicare coverage.
Jim Miller is a regular contributor to the NBC Today show and author of The Savvy Senior Book. www.savvysenior.org
We owe much of our greater understanding of black history to Carter G. Woodson.
Born to former slaves, Woodson worked hard and against the tide of prejudice to obtain his own education.
In earning his doctorate from Harvard, Woodson was disturbed to find that during his studies, history books virtually ignored the black American population. So he decided to take on the challenge of writing black Americans into the history books.
He established the Association for the Study of Negro Life and History (now called the Association for the Study of Afro-American Life and History) in 1915, and a year later founded the widely respected Journal of Negro History.
Then in 1926, he launched Negro History Week, the precursor to Black History Month, as an initiative to bring national attention to the contributions of black people throughout American history.
February was chosen as Black History Month for the significant
events and people who figured prominently in black American history.
For example: Feb. 23, 1868: W.E.B. DuBois, civil rights leader and co-founder of the NAACP, was born.
Feb. 3, 1870: The 15th Amendment was passed, granting blacks the right to vote.
Feb. 25, 1870: The first black U.S. senator, Hiram R. Revels (1822-1901), took his oath of office. Feb. 12, 1909: The National Association for
the Advancement of Colored People was founded by a group of concerned black and white citizens in New York City. Feb. 1, 1960: A group of black Greensboro, N.C., college students began a sit-in at a segregated Woolworth’s lunch counter. The event marks a watershed moment in the civil-rights movement.
Celebrating the History of Black History Month
Carter G. Woodson
8 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
In both folklore and literature there is the phenomenon of “love at first sight.” It happens to some people. Marc Antony and Cleopatra, Romeo and Juliet, Napoleon and Josephine are prominent examples. They had to fall in love at first sight. There was no time to waste. Bad things caught up quickly with these couples.
Christopher Marlowe (1564-1593), poet and playwright, coined this couplet to defend the reality of love at first sight: “Where both deliberate, the love is slight. Who ever loved, that loved not at first sight?” Shakespeare liked the lines so well he virtually copied them for one of his plays.
In folklore we find many examples. Children may believe their parents fell in love at first sight. But when Mama is asked for details, she may demur, noting: “Well, it didn’t quite happen that way.”
According to Newsweek magazine in 2012, 34 percent of men and 27 percent of women say they have experienced love at first sight. These percentages seem surprisingly low. Perhaps those who did not admit to such an experience banished the memory. Some of us have fallen in love at first sight more than once.
How often do we hear of people falling in love at first sight in their later years? Not often. The sensation is reserved almost entirely for the vulnerable young, those who experience almost-instant hormonal arousal, an adrenaline rush, a sweaty palpitation, or a fear-of-failure introduction where words stumble out awkwardly. The sensation is real, but
the affection is bogus.When we read of older people
falling in love at first sight, it is frequently an aged man falling for a woman young enough to be his granddaughter. These cases are newsworthy because they are rare.
Oil tycoon J. Howard Marshall was 89 when he married 26-year-old Anna Nicole Smith. Their marriage lasted 14 months, at which time he expired. Supreme Court Justice William Douglas was 68 when he married Cathleen Heffernan, 22. That
marriage lasted 14 years, at which time he expired. Both couples satisfied their vows of “’til death do us part.’”
How can we tell that it is truly love at first sight? It is apparent
in the eyes of the enamored. Several renowned persons have been credited with originating the famous line: “The eyes are the windows to the soul.” It seems everyone wants to claim authorship.
Eyes do reveal feelings, including passion. When one feels a strong attraction toward another, the pupils are said to dilate. This draws more attention to the eyes. Much can be communicated through eye contact. Barry and Greenwich truly had insight when they titled their popular song “The Look of Love is in Your Eyes.”
Opposite personalities who discover instinctive attraction to each other represent a more realistic phenomenon than love at first sight. Instinctive attraction at first
please see INFATUATION page 16
My 22 Cents’ Worth
Infatuation at First Sight
Walt Sonneville
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www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 9
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By Bill Levine
One of the most satisfying things I’ve done in my life was delivering my dad’s eulogy. It’s right up there with getting married, having kids, and winning the Newton Junior High Basketball championship in 1966.
But since that day graveside in November 2013, I’ve struggled to understand why a paean to my dad in front of a couple of dozen shivering mourners pleases me so much.
I think the great vibes I got from my eulogy were based on my feeling that I had made the essence of him known to the world by describing his “art of the deal.” Though he was a dentist, his real vocation was selflessly helping people through his numerous connections. This had to be told, and I told it.
But I admit this need to extol him may have been spurred on by my internal faint praise. We had some issues, my dad and I, which prevented me being an exemplary son in my book.
Dad was a larger-than-life figure whom I idolized. But I tended to shrink from life. As a kid I imagined he would have made a better father for my more athletic, outgoing friends. He didn’t have much patience, and I was a quirky kid who required patience.
He could be overcritical. A normal reprimand, like, “You’ve gotta pay more attention to your personal belongings,” got blown up by my dad to: “How stupid are you to have left your coat at the playground? What is the matter with you?” Yet there must be a lost Rockwell print of Dad and me watching the Red Sox on TV.
The upshot was that about 50 percent of my psychotherapeutic hours as an adolescent were spent discussing my dad; my mother and sister and my anal-retentive phase were distant runners-up.
In the last 10 years of his life, Dad pleaded no contest twice to being insensitive to my travails as a child. He would state that he should have gotten me help sooner. Indeed, my high school extracurricular project was convincing him I needed a shrink.
With adult perspective I absolved him, telling him to forget about it. His mea culpas, though, did not have that much staying power. I wanted more equality for my family, vis-á-vis my sister’s brood, from his late-in-life financial largesse. But he would not budge in his allocation strategy. Here I felt victimized by his stubbornness and his favoritism of my sister. Maybe childish for a 60-year-old, I admit, but not without provocation.
As Dad hit 90, his independent-living status was in name only. His horizons had shrunk, so he was asking more of me. I deferred trips to stores, rationalizing that his part-time home aide could always take him. I visited him in person every two or three weeks, outside of the good-son sweet spot but frequently enough to staunch an overwhelming flow of guilt.
He would call me up to bluntly ask, “Where were you? I haven’t heard from you.” I would then mutter a few excuses. Really, though, it was just that I couldn’t feel obliged enough to listen to his steady mix of Red Sox recap and silences.
On the day my dad died, I drove 95 miles from home to see my son at school. When I got there, the hospice nurse called to ask if I was privy to funeral arrangements for my dad. I immediately asked her if my dad was about to die. She said it wasn’t necessarily imminent. I did drive home right away, though.
Once home, I conveniently extrapolated the nurse’s call to the funeral home as just cautionary. I didn’t feel obligated to perform a bedside vigil.
The nurse called several hours later to tell me my dad had died. She said she had read Sports Illustrated to him as he exited this world.
No one but I should have been reading SI to him. I blew it.
Maybe, then, the eulogy was my last shot at being a good son. I stood and delivered for him at the end. That’s why my dad’s eulogy was so cathartic and, moreover, such an endorphin bath. I buried my indifferent-son persona with him.
Eulogy High
10 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
You have to be somewhere today.There’s no hurry or schedule
to follow, but you must get there on time. You don’t have a map or itinerary and the destination might be a surprise, but once you arrive, as happens in the new book Where We Belong by Hoda Kotb (with Jane Lorenzini), you’ll be in exactly the right place.
It’s natural: a turn of the calendar, and you’re feeling some inner restlessness. It’s OK to admit it, says Kotb: You sense that there’s more to life, and you yearn to find it. The good news is that it’s never too late to start working toward that perfect spot in your world; in fact, here, Kotb introduces readers to people who did.
Michelle Hauser grew up in Mason City, Iowa, living sometimes
with her mother and sometimes with her father.
By age 10, she skillfully ran a household; at 12, she landed a paying job because she sensed a need for self-sufficiency; at 14, she worked in a restaurant, where her love of cooking was cemented.
She ultimately became a chef, but throughout her life, she always harbored a dream of being a doctor. It would be even better if her two
passions could unite …
Craig Juntenen never wanted children and had taken steps to ensure that it didn’t happen; his wife, Kathi, had known about his tenets when they were dating, and she accepted them.
She was, therefore, very surprised when Craig came home after a golf outing and announced that he had an idea that ultimately changed their lives
and their family, when two became five …
Kay Abrahams grew up in the lap of luxury with everything she wanted—except parental attention, which she longed for. Her parents loved her, that was a fact, but they were busy with careers and had little time for her.
Eventually, she fell into the same situation, but a move halfway across the country helped her find the “family” she needed.
And for successful businessman Lindley DeGarmo, the move away from a sales career meant moving toward a job closer to his heart—and to his soul.
So where’s your turning point? It won’t be identical to the ones you’ll find inside Where We Belong, but you’ll get a lot of inspiration just the same—you’ll also get a lot of same. Indeed, the stories here are all very similar and, with one exception, preexisting wealth shows up quite often in the tales. That may turn a few readers off.
And yet, who doesn’t struggle with New Year’s resolutions? If you’ve made ’em, then you probably do, and author Hoda Kotb (with Jane Lorenzini) offers something here that’ll energize you: true, encouraging stories.
If those everyday people can identify, find, and accomplish life-changing goals, surely you can, too.
And so, in the end, I mostly enjoyed Where We Belong. It’s a happy book, perhaps just what’s needed to start a year with myriad possibilities. And if you’re eager for that, then this book belongs in your hands.
The Bookworm is Terri Schlichenmeyer. Terri has been reading since she was 3 years old and she never goes anywhere without a book. She lives on a hill in Wisconsin with two dogs and 14,000 books.
The Bookworm Sez
Where We Belong: Journeys that Show Us the Way
Terri Schlichenmeyer
Where We Belong: Journeys That Show Us the Way
By Hoda Kotb with Jane Lorenzini
c. 2016, Simon & Schuster272 pages
www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 11
What do you think of on cold winter days? Cozy evenings by the fire? A simmering pot of chicken soup on a snowy day?
My husband, Bob, thinks of gluten. You see, he’s started this new
shtick: a lifestyle makeover. I hate this very much.
While making our breakfast of broccoli tofu scramble, he asked me what I felt like doing for the day.
“Being a sloth.”“Why don’t we take a nice brisk
walk?”“We already did that two months
ago.”We sat down to eat after I slathered
(more) butter on my second English muffin. Bob piped up, “I think you should change your lifestyle too.”
With his new eating plan, he chewed ever-so-slowly, waiting until his mouth was empty before taking another bite. This was all so annoying.
“Why do I have to eat what you eat, Bob?”
“Because I’m the only one around here who cooks.”
“I can’t cook.” I pointed to my cane, which I’ve needed since a spinal cord injury.
“That’s a ‘lame’ excuse.”“Very funny, Bob.”“What does your cane have to
do with anything? You don’t do one single household chore.” Just as I expected, he put his fork down between each bite.
“Now that’s unfair,” I said. “You know I’m physically unable to do any chores.”
“You can’t wash a plate?” he said.
“I can’t. So sad.”
“Or dust a table?”
“Heartbreaking, Bob. Makes me sick with sadness. My disability makes it impossible for me to do any of those things.”
“You’ve been disabled for 12 years. You haven’t cleaned since the ’70s.”
“Oh.”“You can help, you know. You can
do everything I do.”Darn. I’ve been waiting for him to
figure that out. He continued, “When we go to
the YMCA, I exercise while you eat things from your purse.”
“I have to, Bob. Candy will go bad.”
“The only time I can picture you not eating was when you were walking down the aisle.” Naturally, each forkful he took was the size of a peanut.
If “you are what you eat” is true, Bob’s a carrot. I’m a Big Mac.
“You never meditate,” he said.“Oh no? Watch this.” I got up
from the table, went to the fridge, took a colossal bite of cold pizza, and purred, “Om.”
He didn’t finish his breakfast. “I’m full,” he said. “You also might want to
consider stopping eating when you’re no longer hungry.” I spooned his leftovers into my mouth.
“Now listen,” I said. “Just because you’re doing all this proper stuff doesn’t mean I have to.”
“Then you’ll need to cook on your own.”
“Bob, I’m begging you. Anything but that.”
The thing is—Bob would actually make me my own meals. He’d even continue to do all the chores despite knowing how much I can do. He’d take care of me anytime rather than think of himself first.
So, guess whose turn it is to make a lifestyle change? I know I should be saying that I’ll do it for myself, but that’s not how I feel.
Bob is the ultimate caregiver and friend.
I’ll do it for him.Right after he washes the breakfast
dishes.
Saralee Perel is an award-winning, nationally syndicated columnist. Her new book is Cracked Nuts & Sentimental Journeys: Stories From a Life Out of Balance. To find out more, visit www.saraleeperel.com or email [email protected].
Kerry T. Givens, M.D., M.S.
Lee A. Klombers, M.D.
David S. Williams, M.D.
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Are You Reading?Join the 2016 One Book, One Community campaign by reading
Gaining Ground by Forrest Pritchard
80 libraries in Berks, Dauphin, Lancaster, Lebanon, Perry, and York counties and their community partners present the regional reading campaign.
Attend free library programs and discussions in February! Visit www.oboc.org
or your library to learn more
Such is Life
I Hate Lifestyle ChangesSaralee Perel
Information and support
whenever you need it
View online at: www.onlinepub.com(under supplements)
12 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
For information or reservations : 717-569-11112016 catalog available, or visit our website: www.conestogatours.com
MULTI-DAY TOURS• New Orleans & South ......... Feb 26 – Mar 5• Golden Isles of Georgia ............. Mar 6 – 12• Myrtle Beach Spring Getaway . Mar 14 – 18• Texas & San Antonio ..................Apr 5 – 14• Nashville, Memphis & New Orleans
.........................................................Apr 8 – 17• Charleston, Hilton Head & Savannah
.................................................Apr 10 – 15• Biltmore Festival of Flowers & Dollywood
................................................. Apr 11 – 15• Virginia in the Springtime ........Apr 19 – 22• Gone with the Wind & Atlanta .Apr 25 – 29• Boston Spring Getaway ..............Apr 27- 29• Holland Tulip Festival ................May 9 – 13• Cape Cod ...................................May 9 – 13• Mackinac Island & Michigan Highlights
................................................ May 11 – 17• Chicago Highlights .................... June 6 – 10• National Parks of America ...... June 11 - 22
ONE-DAY TOURS• Westminster Dog Show..................... Feb 15• New York Winter Special .......Feb 20, Mar 5• Atlantic City .........................Feb 20, Mar 19• Mt Airy Show & Casino Neil Diamond
Tribute .............................................. Feb 22• Philadelphia Flower Show
...............................March 5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12• Washington Kick-Off .........................Mar 12• American Girl Place in NY ................Mar 19• New York 9/11 Museum ....................Mar 26• “Fiddler on the Roof” NY Broadway Show
........................................................... Apr 2• New York Auto Show .......................... Apr 2• Washington DC Cherry Blossoms .. Apr 2,6,9• World Trade Center Observation Tower in NY
............................................................ Apr 9• “Wicked” NY Broadway Show ............ Apr 9• “Phantom” NY Broadway Show ......... Apr 9• Washington DC ..................................Apr 16• “Aladdin” NY Broadway Show ...........Apr 16
Traveltizers Travel Appetizers
Authentically Arizona: A Trip through Diné Bikéyah
The ruts are long and narrow; some measure nearly a foot in depth. As the driver swerves to avoid them, he plows across a shallow river, causing the van to list and my head to bang against the door of the four-wheel drive. I envision a muddy death.
My husband and I are on an aptly named Detours expedition, one that aims to explore not only the scenic spots, but also the cultural heritage of Arizona. Our particular tour focuses on the state’s Native people, and we’ve definitely lucked out.
Our guide is Donovan Hanley, a member of the Towering House Clan of the Navajo, who sports a waist-length braid, a broad smile, and a striking turquoise necklace. He’s about as authentic as you can get.
“Yá’át’ ééh abíní [good morning],” he says. “Welcome to Diné Bikéyah [The Navajo Nation].”
During the next four days, as we travel to some of the Navajos’ most sacred spots, he intersperses facts about his people’s beliefs and customs with personal stories about his grandfather (a medicine man), his father (a sheep herder), and his 8-year-old niece, who still lives in the same town where he grew up.
As for his necklace, he tells us
that the turquoise stones symbolize creation. Like the sky and water, they provide security and protection.
“The strand on the right is my mother,” he says. “The one on the left is my father. And the loop at the bottom, the strand that connects them, is the umbilical cord. By joining together, they have created me, the future generation.”
Hanley grew up near Monument Valley, a 30,000-acre tribal park near the Arizona/Utah border. The land is filled with stark rock formations that are familiar to most of us from countless movies that depict the American West.
But to the Navajo, the sandstone rocks are more than a filmmaker’s prop; they reflect their way of life and represent some of their deepest convictions.
We tour the valley in an open-air vehicle driven by a specially licensed Navajo guide. In the distance I see The Mittens, a pair of massive buttes that look like the hands of a gloved giant.
“The giant is so big that he can safeguard us,” says the guide.
He continues past spots where medicine men pray, where prospectors have discovered silver, and where a tall, solitary spire resembles the fireplace in
By Andrea Gross
The Mittens, so called because they resemble the mitten-clad hands of a giant, are two of the most distinctive
buttes in Monument Valley.
Director John Ford often used Monument Valley as a setting for his films, and for many folks it has come
to symbolize the American West.
www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 13
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the center of a traditional Navajo hogan (home).
Before leaving the valley, we stop at a hogan to learn about the techniques and beliefs surrounding crafts like spinning and weaving. A weaver explains that authentic blankets and baskets always have a “spirit line” that allows the artisan’s creativity to be used anew on subsequent projects.
Although Monument Valley has been inhabited for thousands of years, it’s the red geological formations—the tall, skinny buttes and wide, flat mesas—that are the real attraction. For up-close views of the petroglyphs and cliff dwellings that show the human history of Navajoland, we head to Canyon de Chelly National Monument.
A light, gentle rain—a female rain, says our driver—bathes the cottonwood trees with a soft sparkle and brightens the green that peeks out from the rocks.
We see the farms that belong to the 50 or 60 families who live in the canyon today, study the dwellings left by the ancients, and listen to our driver tell stories about his childhood, when he was raised by his grandmother and
slept on a sheepskin tossed on the floor of her hogan.
We’re admiring a Puebloan compound perched in a canyon alcove far above us when the sky is split by a flash of lightening.
“No problem,” says the driver. “The rain will come from the right. I will
turn my van to the left.” He careens along the bumpy road,
outrunning the rain—the heavy, male rain—that pelts the ground off to the right.
Hanley laughs when we thank him for arranging another authentically Navajo experience.
“Power lies with those who can read the clouds,” he says.
En route back to Phoenix, we stop at Hubbell Trading Post, the oldest continuously operating trading post in the country.
At first glance, it’s a mix of groceries, dry goods, and run-of-the-mill souvenirs. At second, it’s a repository of outstanding Native American art, from antique rugs to modern creations.
As the resident historian tells the story of a Yei rug, a small woman with long, gray hair walks in, carrying a large, paper-wrapped package. She is, says the proprietor, a master weaver, still practicing what threatens to become a lost art. Two women vie to purchase the rug; the visitor from Sweden wins.
As for me, I settle for a simple souvenir that I find at a nearby convenience store. It’s a 9-inch doll outfitted with a necklace similar to Hanley’s. For $8.95 I have security, protection, and wonderful memories.
For more about Arizona’s Native culture and other Arizona attractions, see www.traveltizers.com. Photos © Irv Green unless otherwise noted; story by Andrea Gross (www.andreagross.com).
Navajo craftspeople demonstrate traditional crafts in Monument
Valley’s hogan.
Canyon de Chelly is home to many cliff dwellings.
Guide Donovan Hanley uses personal stories to give people
insight into Navajo culture.
A traditional Navajo house, called a hogan, is on display in Monument Valley. Today hogans are most often
used for ceremonial purposes.
DR. CHESHTY PROVIDES CARE AT THE WOMEN’S SPECIALTY CENTER.A unique specialty center exclusively for women.
Dr. Cheshty will provide digestive health services for female patients at the Lancaster General Health Women’s Specialty Center.
Dr. Cheshty is board certified in gastroenterology and internal medicine with special interests in women health, gastroenterological cancers, health and nutrition.
Visit RGAL.com or LGHealth.com to learn more about this center, the only of its kind in the region.
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14 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
Woodcrest VillaMennonite Home Communities2001 Harrisburg PikeLancaster, PA 17601Connie BuckwalterDirector of Marketing(717) 390-4126www.woodcrestvilla.org
St. Anne’sretirement Community3952 Columbia AvenueWest Hempfield Township, PA 17512Mary Jo DiffendallDirector of Marketing(717) [email protected]
Willow Valley Communities600 Willow Valley SquareLancaster, PA 17602Kristin HambletonDirector of Sales(717) 464-6800(800) 770-5445www.willowvalleycommunities.org
CCRCs offer a tiered approach to the aging process, accommodating residents’ unique and often changing needs. Healthy adults entering a CRCC are able to live independently in a home, apartment, or condominium of their own within the community.
When assistance with everyday activities becomes necessary, they can move into personal care, assisted living, rehabilitation, or nursing care facilities. Some CCRCs have designated dementia areas within the community. These units address the progressing needs of people who have any form of dementia.
With a wealth of available resources, these communities give older adults the option to live in one location for the duration of their lives, with much of their future care already figured out — which equals both comfort and peace of mind.
Bethany Village325 Wesley DriveMechanicsburg, PA 17055Stephanie LightfootDirector of Sales & Marketing(717) 766-0279www.bethanyvillage.org
Chapel Pointeat Carlisle770 South Hanover StreetCarlisle, PA 17013Linda AmsleyDirector of Marketing/Admissions(717) [email protected]
Cornwall Manor1 Boyd Street, P.O. Box 125Cornwall, PA 17016Jennifer MargutDirector of Marketing(717) [email protected]
The CCRC Communities listed are sponsoring this message. This is not an all-inclusive list.
Homeland Center1901 North Fifth StreetHarrisburg, PA 17102-1598Barry S. Ramper II, N.H.A.President/CEO(717) 221-7902www.homelandcenter.org
Cross Keys VillageThe Brethren Home Community2990 Carlisle PikeNew Oxford, PA 17350Amy BesteSenior Retirement Counselor(717) [email protected]
Homestead Village Enhanced Senior Living1800 Marietta AvenueP.O. Box 3227Lancaster, PA 17604-3227Christina GallagherDirector of Marketing(717) 397-4831 ext. 158www.homesteadvillage.org
The Middletown Home999 West Harrisburg PikeMiddletown, PA 17057Andrea HenneyDirector of Residential Services(717) 944-3351 www.MiddletownHome.org
Serving from theHeart in the Spirit of
Friendship, Love,and Truth
Pleasant Viewretirement Community544 North Penryn RoadManheim, PA 17545Amanda HallSales & Marketing Manager(717) [email protected]
The listings with a shaded background have additional information about their center in a display advertisement in this edition.
CCRCContinuing Care
Retirement Communities
Calvary FellowshipHomes502 Elizabeth DriveLancaster, PA 17601Marlene MorrisMarketing Director(717) 393-0711www.calvaryhomes.org
www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 15
Calendar of EventsLancaster County
support groups Free and open to the public
Feb. 3, 7 to 8:15 p.m.Alzheimer’s Caregivers Support GroupWillow Lakes Outpatient Center212 Willow Valley Lakes Drive, Willow Street(717) 464-9365
Feb. 8, 10 to 11 a.m.Alzheimer’s Caregivers Support GroupGarden Spot Village Concord Room433 S. Kinzer Ave., New Holland(717) [email protected]
Feb. 18, noonBrain Tumor Support GroupLancaster General Health Campus Wellness Center2100 Harrisburg Pike, Lancaster(717) 626-2894
Feb. 22, 2 to 3 p.m.Parkinson’s Support GroupGarden Spot Village Concord Room433 S. Kinzer Ave., New Holland(717) [email protected]
Feb. 24, 6 to 8 p.m.Epilepsy Foundation of Eastern Pennsylvania Support GroupLancaster General Hospital – Stager Room 5555 N. Duke St., Lancaster(800) 887-7165, ext. 104
Community progrAms Free and open to the public
sEnior CEntEr ACtivitiEsCocalico Senior Association – (717) 336-7489Feb. 8, 9 a.m. – The Price is RightFeb. 24, 9:30 a.m. – Board GamesFeb. 26, 9 a.m. – The News
Columbia Senior Center – (717) 684-4850Feb. 5, 10:15 a.m. – Balance and Exercise with LynnFeb. 22, 10 a.m. – Medicare Fraud with John FogelFeb. 25, 10:15 a.m. – Town Hall and Fundraising
Meetings
Elizabethtown Area Senior Center – (717) 367-7984 Feb. 3, 1:30 p.m. – Bingo for Bucks/Cash PrizesFeb. 10, 10 a.m. – Tiddly WinksFeb. 23, 10:30 a.m. – Music with Ricky Kilby
Lancaster House North Happy Hearts Club Senior Center – (717) 299-1278Tuesdays, 1 p.m. – Varied ActivitiesThursdays, noon – Pinochle
Lancaster Neighborhood Senior Center – (717) 299-3943Feb. 3, 10:30 a.m. – BingoFeb. 12, 10:30 a.m. – TriviaFeb. 23, 9:30 a.m. – Consumer Scams
Lancaster Rec. Senior Center – (717) 392-2115, ext. 147Tuesdays, 9:30 a.m. – Chair DancingFeb. 14, 10:30 a.m. – Valentine’s Day PartyFeb. 19, 10:30 a.m. – Penn State Nutrition with Donna
Lititz Senior Center – (717) 626-2800Feb. 6, 10 a.m. – Music and Dancing with Leslie BowerFeb. 12, 9:30 a.m. – Bible Study with Pastor
Vernon CollieFeb. 19, 10 a.m. – Nutrition Bingo
Luis Munoz Marin Senior Center – (717) 295-7989Fridays, 10 a.m. – Table GamesFeb. 12, 10 a.m. – Valentine’s Day CelebrationFeb. 23, 10:30 a.m. – Bingo Games
Millersville Senior Center – (717) 871-9600Feb. 8, 10:30 a.m. – Sundae MondayFeb. 22, 10:30 a.m. – Bingo with Oak Leaf ManorFeb. 29, 10:30 a.m. – Penn State Nutrition with Donna
Next Gen Senior Center – (717) 786-4770Feb. 12, 9:30 a.m. – Valentine’s Day PartyFeb. 18, 10:30 a.m. – Wii BowlingFeb. 24, 10:30 a.m. – Trivia with Bob Reigh
Rodney Park Happy Hearts Club Senior Center – (717) 393-7786 Tuesdays, noon – Pinochle Wednesdays, 1 p.m. – Varied Activities Thursdays, noon – Bingo
LibrAry progrAms
Feb. 1, 6 p.m.Red Rose Singles MeetingHoss’s Steak & Sea House100 W. Airport Road, Lititz(717) 406-6098
Feb. 3, 2 p.m.Korean War Veterans Association MeetingOak Leaf Manor North2901 Harrisburg Pike, Landisville(717) [email protected]
Feb. 5, 5 to 9 p.m.Opening Reception: The Art of Matthew Thomas AbruzzoMulberry Art Studios19-21 N. Mulberry St., Lancaster(717) 295-1949
Feb. 16, 2 to 3:30 p.m.Brick Walls in Genealogy Part IIWillow Valley Genealogy ClubWillow Valley Communities – Orr Auditorium211 Willow Valley Square, Lancasterwww.genealogyclubwv.com(717) 397-0439
Feb. 19, 6 to 9 p.m.Music FridaysDowntown Lancaster (717) 341-0028
Feb. 20, 7 p.m.Temple Avenue JazzGarden Spot Village Chapel433 S. Kinzer Ave., New Holland(717) 355-6000
Feb. 25, 2 p.m.Centerville AARP Chapter 4221 MeetingPheasant Ridge Community Center209 Longwood Court West, Lancaster(717) 786-4714
Lititz Public Library, 651 Kissel Hill Road, Lititz, (717) 626-2255Feb. 10, 6:30 p.m. – Great Decisions Discussion Group: The Middle EastFeb. 18, 7 p.m. – Wine 101: An Introduction to WineFeb. 20, 1:30 p.m. – A Colorful Folk: Pennsylvania Germans and the Art of Everyday Life
If you have an event you would like to include,
please email information to [email protected]
for consideration.
16 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
LANCASTER COUNTY EMPLOYERS NEED YOU!!Age 55 or over? Unemployed? The 55+ Job Bank is one of three
services offered by Employment Unit at the Office of Aging. Jobs are matched with those looking for work. Based on an
evaluation of your skills and abilities, we can match you with a position needed by a local employer. Some employers are specifically looking for older workers because of the reliability and experience they bring to the workplace. There is a mix of full-time and part-time jobs covering all shifts, requiring varying levels of skill and experience, and offering a wide range of salaries.
The other services available through the Office of Aging are the Senior Community Service Employment Program (SCSEP) and the regularly scheduled Job Search Workshops.
For more job listings, call the Lancaster County Office of Aging
at (717) 299-7979or visit
www.co.lancaster.pa.us/lanco_aging
Lancaster County Office of Aging150 N. Queen Street, Suite 415
Lancaster, PA
JobOpportunities E.O.E.
DRIVERS – PT/FTLocal transportation company is seeking persons for both part-time and full-time non-CDL positions. Candidates must have a safe driving record and be able to pass company drug screen. Benefits for full-time positions. Competitive wages. SN010034.01HANDYMAN/WOMAN – PTLocal service company looking for individuals who can perform light home maintenance/repairs for their in-home caregiver clients including
carpentry, electrical, heating, plumbing, and small appliance repairs. Some prior technical ability/experience is required.
SN010064.02
VIEW OUR JOB LISTWe list other jobs on the Web
at www.co.lancaster.pa.us/lanco_aging. To learn more
about applying for the 55+ Job Bank and these jobs, call the
Employment Unit at (717) 299-7979.
SN-GEN.03
ASSEMBLERS – FTLocal agency recruiting for an iconic American brand to build their product in York County.
Jobs are physically demanding and candidates must pass several assessment tests. Both first and
second shifts are available covering four 10-hour days per week.
SN010073.04
— Volunteer Opportunities —The volunteer opportunities available at Lancaster County Office of Aging are diverse, offer flexibility, and require a minimal time
commitment. As a volunteer, you can choose to provide a consumer with hands-on help with laundry, grocery shopping, or cleaning. You can
also provide socialization as a Phone Pal or Friendly Visitor. There are several specialized programs for volunteers through our agency. They include the Volunteer Ombudsman and APPRISE
volunteer programs. Volunteers are also invited to participate in several special events during the year, distribution of donated chicken barbecue
dinners, and the Christmas holiday program.For more information about any of these opportunities and others, contact Bev Via, volunteer coordinator, at (717) 299-7979 or
[email protected]. Becoming an Office of Aging volunteer will enrich your life in 2016 and help an older person remain in the community!
sight doesn’t necessarily indicate interest in a long-term relationship. One may admire in the other those characteristics one lacks, such as sociability, humor, ambition, knowledge, or a musical, dance, or athletic talent.
Opposites can introduce each other to new interests. Sameness can be boring. Viva la difference is the hallmark bond of many happy partnerships.
But differences have limits in retaining interests. Couples sharing core values, attitudes, and religions have a more durable bonding than those who lack such commonalities. This is the conclusion reached by
researchers at the University of Iowa (Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, February 2005).
Some differences are implanted in the relationship from the beginning. Men and women are psychologically different. John Gray elaborated this point in his Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus, a book that sold more than 7 million copies. Isn’t this something we learned in our teens?
In a satisfying, continuing relationship, our differences are complementary. She is naturally submissive, while he is moderately domineering. Or, he is shy while she is an extrovert. Somehow a workable
balance is reached.In young people, the reproductive
genetic search, either at the conscious or subconscious level, drives us to seek a partner with particular features to endow any offspring that might issue. It could be an attraction to nice hair, white teeth, small ears, high cheekbones, long eyelashes—features that offset deficiencies we feel about ourselves.
As we age, we become less attracted by physical features. We look for similarities that enhance companionship. We appreciate the importance of differences in our schedules so we have some privacy to read, meditate, listen to music, or
view television in pursuit of our own interests.
An enduring relationship requires a measure of humility by both partners. One should yield on occasion in the expectation of prevailing some other time. That helps preserve love until the last sight.
Walt Sonneville, a retired market-research analyst, is the author of My 22 Cents’ Worth: The Higher-Valued Opinion of a Senior Citizen and A Musing Moment: Meditative Essays on Life and Learning, books of personal-opinion essays, free of partisan and sectarian viewpoints. Contact him at [email protected].
INFATUATION from page 8
Warren Buffett is one of the richest people in the world, so his advice on money should be worth heeding.
Here, in his own words, are some of his tips and aphorisms on saving, investing, and spending:
Planning. “Someone’s sitting in the
shade today because someone planted a tree long ago.”
Spending. “Price is what you pay; value is what you get.”
Patience. “No matter how great the talent or efforts, some things just take time. You can’t produce a baby in
one month by getting nine women pregnant.”
Mistakes. “The rearview mirror is always clearer than the windshield.”
Borrowing. “I’ve seen more people fail because of liquor and leverage—leverage being borrowed money. You
really don’t need leverage in this world much. If you’re smart, you’re going to make a lot of money without borrowing.”
Debt. “The most important thing to do when you find yourself in a hole is to stop digging.”
Wisdom from ‘the Oracle of Omaha’
www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 17
To me, February in southeastern Pennsylvania is an exciting month because mid-February is the start of spring in this area.
Daylight each succeeding day is noticeably longer, stirring the hormones of several kinds of local birds and mammals and starting their reproductive cycles that we humans can observe. Their courting is a welcome herald of spring’s arrival and a prelude to raising young.
By the middle of February, pairs of local Canada geese and mallard ducks fly alone across the sky. Each pair is looking for a place near an impoundment or slow-moving waterway in farmland to build a nest on the ground and hatch offspring.
Toward the end of that month, most pairs have decided on and defended a spot, and the females of each pair created a grass-and-feather nursery among tall vegetation.
By late February or early March, each hen begins laying eggs in her cradle on the ground. Each goose lays four to six eggs, while each mallard lays up to 15. Goslings and ducklings take about 28 days to hatch, so we see newly hatched youngsters of geese and mallards around the third week in April.
On warm afternoons in February, male permanent-resident birds, including mourning doves, Carolina wrens, northern cardinals, song sparrows, tufted titmice, house
finches, and eastern bluebirds, begin singing to establish nesting territories and attract females of their respective kinds to them for mating and raising young.
Those lovely birds sing in response to their waking hormones as each
succeeding day has a longer period of sunlight.
With closed beaks and swollen throats, male doves coo through the day while perched on twigs and wires. And they engage in noticeable courtship flights of deep wing beats and gliding in circles above their nesting territories to show off to their mates.
In our imaginations, male wrens might sing, “tea-kettle tea-kettle,” while male cardinals sing, “cheer, cheer, what cheer.” And
titmice utter, “Peter, Peter, Peter.” All these songs sound cheery to us, lifting many human spirits weary of winter.
More striped skunks, opossums, raccoons, woodchucks, cottontail rabbits, and muskrats are killed on roads in February and early March than any other time of the year. Probably most of them were males traveling over unfamiliar ground in search of mates.
February is a time of courting and mating to produce another generation of youngsters. And those preludes to reproduction help make that spring month interesting.
Clyde McMillan-Gamber is a retired Lancaster County Parks naturalist.
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Canada geese.
Male cardinal.
Humane League Pet of the Month
BuddySix-year-old Buddy is part
Schipperke, possibly part Jack Russell, and 100 percent full of love and devotion!
Buddy’s great big ears can’t be missed and his personality is just as large. He is a chipper fellow who loves to go for walks and play with his toys.
He was brought to the Humane League through no fault of his own; his owners were going through a divorce and knew they could no longer give him the time and attention that he deserves.
Buddy is a true people person; he loves everyone he meets. He is a smart dog who knows basic commands and responds well to treats and praise (C’mon, who doesn’t enjoy someone telling us how great we are along with a treat?).
Buddy’s idea of a perfect day is to have a devoted human playmate nearby. His previous owner wanted his new family to know that “Buddy is a very good dog. Play with him a lot and he will be very happy!”
We couldn’t have said it better ourselves! Buddy ID No. 205894
For more information, please contact the Humane League of Lancaster County at (717) 393-6551.
18 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
Salute to a Veteran
In World War II He Flew for the Yanks … and for the Brits
At age 94, Richard Boyd is a clear reminder of Hollywood’s handsome Errol Flynn. And he has a dashing past to match, virtually all of which was devoted to aviation.
The exploits started for him in 1941 in his native England, when he was 19 and volunteered for service with the Royal Air Force (RAF) as a crewmember. He was selected for pilot training and began flying the Tiger Moth single-engine biplane. And just before he was to solo, his whole world changed.
The chief of the U.S. Army Air Corps, “Hap” Arnold, had proposed that a limited number of British young men be trained in our aviation cadet program. Boyd was one of five picked from his group and soon was on his way to the U.S. via a holding base in New Brunswick, where a
group of soon-to-be cadets was being assembled.
Then, in 1942 he was sent to
Albany, Ga., to join the aviation cadet class of 42-I, flying the Stearman PT-17. Did he wear an American uniform?
“All but the forage cap, which earmarked me as a Brit,” he says.
In succession then followed basic flying at Macon, Ga., and advanced flying at Valdosta, Ga., where he
got his U.S. wings and RAF rank of pilot officer (the equivalent of our 2nd lieutenant).
He then shipped to Toronto in 1943, where he most memorably met and dated the winsome Rita Mary O’Gorman (more on that later).
It was there that he also was unexpectedly picked to be one of five pilots from his group of 60 to go to Texas to attend the Army Air Corps Central Instructors School at Kelly Field. Having completed that instructor training, he was assigned to Ellington Field in Houston, where he served as an instructor pilot in AT-9s and AT-10s.
In December, he was called back to the RAF, and he shipped from New York for Europe aboard the Queen Mary. What was that like?
With a chuckle, he says, “It was
Robert D. Wilcox
The Lancaster bomber in which Boyd flew his missions.
Flying Officer Richard E. Boyd in 1945.
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a madhouse. With 16,000 troops aboard, there were bunks stacked everywhere. Mine was actually on the bridge of the vessel.”
The Queen Mary was the largest and fastest troopship during World War II. In her seven years of wartime service, she ran an unescorted, zigzag course for 569,429 miles as she carried 765,429 troops across the Atlantic to England.
Arriving in Liverpool, Boyd was sent to Scotland to train to fly the British way. He laughs at the way a sergeant pilot said, “I understand that you trained in the American Air Force.” When Boyd agreed that he had, the sergeant said briskly, “Ah … we’ll soon correct that.”
That was followed by flying the twin-engine Wellington, then the four-engine Stirling, and finally the formidable, four-engine Lancaster. That amazing bomber could carry almost its own weight with 33,000 pounds of fuel and bombs. It was the only plane that could handle the RAF’s giant, 22,000-pound, special-purpose bomb, the Grand Slam.
While we think of the Brits as bombing in the night while we bombed by day, the RAF bombed a lot by day, as well. Boyd, for example, flew 11 missions by day and 22 at night.
At night, he was four times picked to be “marker crew,” which dropped flares to light up the target. He remembers one night when he had a problem with his radar over Dresden and had to face the flak during three runs over the target to hit it.
He also recalls a daylight mission when they were to bomb German troops at the east end of the Remagen Bridge over the Rheine, only to be called away at the very last minute upon learning that the Yanks had now crossed the bridge and actually were the troops below them.
For his wartime service, Boyd was awarded the Distinguished Flying Cross.
On V-E Day, Boyd was at home on leave and was assigned
to transport command, where he flew Stirling bombers that had been converted to carry troops and equipment to Karachi, India, to fight the Japanese. What was the closest he ever came to buying the farm?
Scratching his chin, he says, “That has to be the time after the war when I was flying in a York transport plane as an observer. We crashed on landing, and I spent six months in the hospital in a full-body cast. That’s a time I don’t even want to think about.”
Leaving the RAF in 1947, Boyd worked as a flight operations officer for British Overseas Airways. He had been corresponding regularly with Rita, that girl in Toronto, and only then when he had a real job did he feel that he could send the letter that said, “Will you marry me?” along with a one-way ticket to England on the Queen Mary.
Even though they hadn’t been together in person in four years, she came, they quickly married, and for 68 years have never regretted the decision.
In 1951, Boyd joined the Dutch airline KLM for five years before Swissair asked him to work for them and open a New York City office. To do that, he and Rita came to New York, where they lived on Long Island.
Boyd became operations manager, North America, in 1969 and retired in 1986 after 30 years with the company. With his complimentary airline tickets, he and Rita have literally traveled the world.
They came to Lancaster County in 2013 to live in one of its retirement communities. And Boyd is proud of the space it gives him for a “war room” in which he keeps a treasure trove of aviation books, pictures, documents, and awards … all that reminds him of the lifetime he’s been privileged to spend in the cutting-edge world of aviation.
Colonel Wilcox flew a B-17 bomber in Europe in World War II.
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20 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
Dear Pharmacist, Both my father and brother have
suffered a heart attack. I’m worried because I’m 52 years old and my blood pressure is slightly elevated, but other than that, I am pretty healthy. All my tests are OK, but I am scared. Any suggestions?
– P.A.
Just because your relatives have suffered a heart attack, doesn’t mean you will, so realize that in this moment, you are still healthy. Positive thoughts reduce stress hormones like cortisol, which damage the heart.
Because you have a family history of heart disease, remain vigilant about eating a healthy, well-balanced diet; doing aerobic exercise; and taking essential nutrients that help maintain normal blood pressure and cholesterol.
Most Americans take blood pressure drugs. Pharmaceutically speaking, there are more than 100
different pills to tackle high blood pressure. In some instances, these are helpful, but they relax blood vessels temporarily, while the disease process continues.
Many drugs used to lower blood pressure just so happen to be drug muggers of magnesium, zinc, calcium, and iron, so taking a multi-mineral supplement or a trace-mineral supplement a few hours after you take your medicine can mitigate side effects.
While blood pressure or cholesterol medications, beta blockers, calcium-channel blockers, and digoxin may be prescribed by your physician, it’s important to realize that their effect on your body is only temporary.
The under–lying disease and inflammation will continue to destroy the delicate pipeline: your blood vessels, arteries, and capillaries. This is why vitamin C, lysine, and proline help, because they
keep your blood vessels flexible and help reduce plaquing.
I wrote a whole chapter on heart disease in my diabetes book, and right now, I’d like to share some of the most important supplements that could help a person reduce their risk of heart attack.
Obviously, ask your physician which supplement(s) are right for your individual condition:
Arginine – It’s an amino acid that the body makes on its own. You can buy it too. In 2009, researchers at the University of Virginia found that it could help people with heart failure.
Ribose – It’s a naturally occurring sugar that the body uses to make ATP, your energy molecule. Ribose improves blood flow and provides much-needed oxygen to the heart.
Hawthorn – It’s an herb that increases the amount of blood your heart pumps, and it lowers blood pressure over time. Hawthorne turns on an anti-aging switch in your body (a gene called PGC-1 alpha), which helps you burn fat more efficiently.
Fish Oils – They improve cholesterol ratios and reduce risk of blood clot formation.
Taurine – It’s an amino acid that helps regulate heart rhythm, regulate blood pressure, and lower blood pressure.
Sometimes potassium deficiency contributes to heart problems. If your doctor has told you that you’re low in this mineral, check in your medicine cabinet because some medications are drug muggers and can actually reduce potassium levels.
This information is not intended to diagnose, prevent, or treat your disease. For more information about the author, visit SuzyCohen.com
19 Buttonwood Dr. • Lititz, PA 17543 • (717) 371-2231 • [email protected]
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CROSSWORD
Across
1. In the middle of5. Draws close10. Expel14. Trademark15. Cow name16. ___ of Green
Gables17. Molecule18. Restricted info20. Med. specialist, to
some22. Anjou23. Stale24. Pecan
25. For the most part27. Pastoral31. Tennis units32. Alias inits.33. Smallest35. Singer John39. Give temporarily41. Feel remorse42. Roof part43. Important question45. Humiliate48. Salome actor
Reason49. Orient51. Abnormal
53. Baked good56. Family room57. Age58. Despot61. Bracelet type65. Paying your own
way at dinner68. Rope fiber69. Retired70. Writer Zola71. God of love72. Young lady73. Asian starlings74. Camping accessory
1. Exclamation of sorrow
2. Light bulb visitor3. Stravinsky, for one4. Game piece5. Menswear6. Annex7. Quick! (abbr.)8. Ascend9. Oil or seed10. Klutz11. Workers’ group12. Fishhook attachment13. ___ bear19. Angry
21. Void’s partner26. Cay27. Indonesian island28. Mus. instruments,
for short29. Containers30. Weight unit31. Behalf34. Hero36. E. Ireland village37. Kitchen appliance38. Adjacent40. Twosome44. Terra firma46. Tranquilizes
47. Level50. Method52. Printer53. Organ part54. Netherlands
Antilles island55. Repletes59. Mil. service60. Harness62. Entice63. Brit. school64. Exam66. Time deposits
(abbr.)67. ___ carte
Down
braINteaSerS
Written by Alan Stillson. Please see http://stillsonworks.com
Popular Candies of the ’50s and ’60sFind these candies that were popular during the ’50s and ’60s:
1. R _ _ _ B _ _ _ Ba _ _ _ _ 2. P _ _ 3. Tu _ _ _ _ h T _ _ _ y 4. M _ _ _ J _ _ _ 5. S _ _ _ _ D _ _ _ y 6. C _ _ _ y C _ g _ _ _ _ _ e 7. W _ _ L _ _ s 8. H _ _ Ta _ _ _ _ s 9. B _ _ _ _ _ B _ _ _ _ B _ _ _ s 10. B _ _ O H _ _ _ _
Love in the ’50s and ’60sFind the movie or song titles with the word love from the ’50s and ’60s:
1. 1953 – Se _ _ _ _ Love 2. 1955 – Love is a M _ _ _ - Sp _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Thing 3. 1956 – Love Me T _ _ _ _ _ 4. 1957 – A _ _ _ _ Love 5. 1958 – The B _ _ _ of Love 6. 1960 – Will You Love Me T _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ? 7. 1963 – Love with the Pr _ _ _ _ St _ _ _ _ _ _ 8. 1963 – From Ru _ _ _ _ with Love 9. 1967 – Love is B _ _ _ 10. 1967 – To S _ _ with Love
SUDOKU
Puzzle PageSolutions for all puzzles can be found on page 22
22 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
Puzzl
e Solu
tions Brainteasers
Puzz
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n on
pag
e 21
1. Root Beer Barrel 2. Pez 3. Turkish Taffy 4. Mary Jane 5. Sugar Daddy
6. Candy Cigarette 7. Wax Lips8. Hot Tamales 9. Boston Baked Beans 10. Bit O Honey
1. “Secret Love” 2. “Love is a Many-Splendored
Thing” 3. “Love Me Tender” 4. “April Love” 5. “The Book of Love”
6. “Will You Love Me Tomorrow?”
7. “Love with the Proper Stranger”
8. “From Russia with Love” 9. “Love is Blue” 10. “To Sir with Love”
Popular Candies of the ’50s and ’60s
Love in the ’50s and ’60s
Cover Story:On Life and Love after 50
Greetings, Introductions, and 10 Tips for Finding Love
I am honored, especially on Valentine’s Day, to be introduced to your newspaper. I have a warm spot in my heart for Pennsylvania. My mother was born in Erie.
My column started when two female editors in Dana Point, Calif., gave me my first writing assignment. I had just gone through a divorce and thought dating would be easy. It turned out to be difficult, and I wrote about the frustrations of a single guy in his early 50s trying to date again.
I complained and whined that younger women wouldn’t go out with me and women my age expected me to pay for dates.
The editors felt that the single women in Southern California would have a field day taking potshots at my woe-is-me message.
They were right. When my first column ran, a woman said: “Who is this sniveling puke?” Another said, “Get the boy a crying towel.”
Women told me my writing became less controversial when I started dating my life partner, Greta.
I’ve written approximately 3,500 articles and newsletters on finding love in the later years, and writing on this topic has been good to me. I’ve published three books and have been interviewed by Matt Lauer on the Today show and Diane Sawyer on Good Morning America—very humbling.
My writing scope has broadened to: “On life and love after 50,” as older singles deal with life issues often beyond the scope of just dating.
My advice is applicable to anyone age 50 to 90. Yes, I know people in their 90s who have found love.
While my articles target singles, approximately 35 percent of my readers are married. Many tell me that reading about the hardships singles endure encourages them to appreciate their spouses more. My advice to married couples is usually pretty simple: Stay together and work out any issues.
Let’s have fun together. Maybe we can help some older singles find love. But to continue writing about senior dating, I need input from readers—your questions, comments, and stories about life and love after 50.
Email me at [email protected] and I will respond within a day or two, unless I’m traveling overseas. Who knows? We might include you in a column.
One thing is certain: As more
and more people become single later in life, there are always new and challenging issues.
People often tell me, “I never thought I’d be single at this stage in my life.” My hope is to help as many of them as possible.
Tom’s 10 Tips for Finding a Mate
My life partner, Greta, and I had dinner with a widower friend of
ours after Christmas. As we were leaving the restaurant, he said, “I don’t want to be alone anymore. But I don’t know how to meet a potential mate. What
do you advise?” I put together a list that would help
him get started. I call it Tom’s 10 Tips for Finding a Mate. The tips apply to both men and women.
1. Let friends, family, and acquaintances know that you’d like to meet other singles. That’s what Ken did with me. He let me know that he was rejoining the human race and wanted to meet new people.
The more people he gets the word out to, the better his chances of finding someone. It’s called networking. And it works.
A week after Ken asked for advice, I received an email from a single woman in his city. I asked each one of them separately if they’d like to correspond. They said yes. Had Ken not mentioned his situation to me, I wouldn’t have thought about introducing them.
2. Get off the couch and out of the house. You won’t meet anybody sitting at home. You need to be where you will meet new people.
Sure, it takes energy and time, but it will give you a purpose. Attend weddings, reunions, church activities, dances, and accept all invitations to events.
Volunteer. Another widower I know volunteers at a nearby hospital twice a week and helps feed the homeless at his brother’s church twice a month. He’s met single women at both places.
3. Go out to enrich your life and meet new people. Do not go out solely to find a mate.
People looking too hard come off as desperate and end up turning off the opposite sex. Often, it’s when we aren’t looking that we meet someone special.
Tom Blake
www.50plusLifePA.com 50plus LIFE • February 2016 23
Save These Dates:May 2–6, 2016
www.lancseniorgames.org
For registration information, please call:
717-299-7979or
717-299-8370“Exercising Body, Mind, and Spirit.”
If you have local news you’d like considered forAround Town, please email [email protected]
AroundTown
Willow Valley CommunitiesReceives ‘A’ Rating
Willow Valley Communities announced recently that it has received an “A” rating with a Stable Rating Outlook from Fitch Ratings, a leading provider of credit ratings, commentary, and research.
Fitch Ratings, based out of New York City and London, is the predominant rating agency in the senior-living sector.
In addition to serving as a tool for investors, in senior living communities the ratings communicate overall financial health to the residents who live there as well as to prospective residents as they assess a particular organization’s strength.
In supporting its rating, Fitch cited Willow Valley Communities’ unique national market draw, with current residents coming from 37 different states. Fitch believes that geographic diversity of WVC’s residents helps insulate it from potential stress in the local economy or housing market.
Fitch also noted Willow Valley Communities’ “solid financial profile,” current demand, and plans for future growth as contributing to the “A” rating.
Military Officers Association Offering Scholarship
The Lancaster Chapter of the Military Officers Association of America (MOAA) is offering a one-time scholarship to a student from Lancaster County, according to chapter president U.S. Army CW3 Antonio Cerase.
This $1,500 CDR Gerald McComber Memorial Scholarship will be for the 2016 scholarship year.
To be eligible, applicants must be a citizen of the United States and maintain a permanent residence in Lancaster County. They must be high school seniors planning to attend a postsecondary school of higher learning or students at a postsecondary institution of higher learning enrolled in ROTC.
Applicants must also have an immediate family member (parent, grandparent, aunt or uncle, sibling, or cousin) who has served or is serving honorably in the United States military.
Applications are available at all county high school guidance departments.
Applications, along with all supporting materials, should be submitted no later than Thursday, March 31, to MOAA, P.O. Box 5031, Lancaster, PA 17601-5031.
The scholarship winner will be announced in May.
“I’m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes, because I know I’m not dumb ... and I also know that I’m not blond.” – Dolly Parton
“The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.” – Mark Russell
The Last Laugh
4. Pursue activities you enjoy where both sexes are involved. For guys repairing old cars, you likely won’t meet a potential mate. Ditto for women who are quilting.
5. Get the body moving. Walk and exercise. Be friendly to folks you see along the way. Offer to walk with them if appropriate.
6. Keep expectations in check. Meeting a potential mate won’t be easy, but don’t give up. It takes time.
7. Internet dating is one method of meeting potential mates. For people living in remote areas, online dating may be a necessity to meet new people.
For people 50-plus, online dating is risky. There are scammers and evil people looking for vulnerable and lonely singles. However, it has worked for lots of couples.
If a guy online sounds too good to be true, he is. Trust your instincts. Don’t be naïve.
8. Smile and be friendly, positive, and upbeat. If you are in a post-
office line, or a grocery-store line, be assertive by striking up a conversation—but don’t be overly pushy about it.
9. Check out the website Meetup (www.meetup.com). There is no cost and they have clubs and groups across the U.S. that cover all kinds of special interests.
Pick some different ones and attend them. You will be enriching your life and making new friends.
10. Subscribe to my weekly On Life and Love after 50 e-newsletter at www.FindingLoveAfter60.com. There is no cost. More than 1,000 singles ages 50 to 90 from across the country share their experiences, frustrations, and successes.
Above all, recharge your batteries and get out and meet new people. I’m betting our friend Ken will be up and running in no time.
For dating information, previous articles, or to sign up for Tom’s complimentary, weekly e-newsletter, go to www.findingloveafter60.com.
24 February 2016 50plus LIFE • www.50plusLifePA.com
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10215A LCMK Flex Ad (Advanced Tech).indd 1 12/7/15 10:17 AM