Leadership Training

How to be an effective peer leader

Three Steps to Success

• Step 1: Know the Destination

• Step 2: How do we lead?– method and framework

• Step 3: Best Practices – Practical Leadership Advice

Step 1: Know the Destination

• A leader is someone who guides or directs others

• A leader should know where to go and what to do

• A good leader will set an achievable goal for those who follow

• They will know how to assist others in achieving this goal

• It should not be the blind leading the blind

So, Where are we going?

• St. John Bosco used to stop boys and ask, “Where are you going?”

• “I’m going to heaven.”• Everything we do as a leader

needs to be directed towards helping others to become living saints and to get to heaven.

• This means that we need to do all things to strengthen the part-icipant’s relationship with God.

The blind leading the blind

• This means that if we are going to be good leaders this week, we too must be focused on that same relationship with Jesus Christ

• We need to lead by example and fully invest ourselves into this retreat

• We should bring life to every activity and remain focused on the retreat.

• You will set the environment by your own enthusiasm.

Leading towards Leadership

• The goal of the Leadership Retreat is to make the participants better leaders

• We also want them to be better Christians• It is important for us to seek and nurture the

leadership of others• This means that our goal in this retreat is to

become unnecessary• I must decrease so that they might increase

The Analogy of the Lamp

• We want the participants to shine - they are the bulb

• The retreat is the body of the lamp which holds the bulb up high & gives it structure

• The adults are the base offering sturdy support for the lamp

• You, the young team, are the power cord meant to feed energy into the system.

• You empower them to shine!

Step 2:How do we lead?

• First and foremost, by example• By becoming a humble servant of the retreat

director and the participants• Young Team should be the least of those on

this retreat, your reward will be great in heaven

• By sticking to the path that is laid out for us• By being aware of the needs of others• By positive attitude and Christian Love.

Salesian Accompaniment

• The method of leadership we use with the Salesians is called accompaniment

• This means that we do everything with our participants!

• Nothing is too cool for us, nothing is beneath us, and we don’t ask another to do what we would not.

• Sharing the experience allows us to lead from within, where we can gently correct and powerfully encourage the participants

Be Preventive!

• Our method is called the Preventive System• This means that we create the environment

where we make it easy for the participants to do what is right

• You don’t have to do bad things to have a good time

• We use accompaniment to redirect behaviors toward the goals of the retreat

Preventive in Practice

• Be aware – Look for objects, activities, or situations

that may lead to trouble– Remove those objects, and change or

redirect those activities or situations to more positive ones.

– Know where the participants are– Look for participants who are left out, sad,

not fitting in, etc. and accompany them

Preventive in Practice

• Be Proactive– Young team MUST anticipate!– Anticipate the needs of the participants– Anticipate the needs of the director– Seek to be helpful– Prevent drama! Don’t cause or magnify it!– Intervene early– Bosco’s prison ministry was in the playground– The best way to help a prisoner, is to see to it that

he never becomes one.

Preventive in Practice

• Reason, Religion, Kindness– Lead and direct with

gentle kindness– Give reasons for

corrections– Keep God at the center

of all your interactions– Encourage and

complement participants– Be Joyful! It’s contagious!

The Analogy of the Egg

• The preventive system is like an egg• The team is like the shell, it keeps bad things out and

it provides a safe environment for the yolk to grow• The egg white is the retreat itself, it nurtures and

strengthens the yolk• The yolk would be the participants• If done correctly the yolk will grow, the participants

will leave the retreat (egg) and will multiply the effect in other places.

Step 3:Best Practices

• In this final step we will take a look at some very practical ways of being an effective leader

• Ultimately your leadership is based on your own commitment to the cause

• If you break the egg the whole thing dies and becomes corrupted

• However the miracle of “New Life in Christ” will happen to you and them if you preserve the egg.

• Here are some practical tips to help you be an outstanding leader.

The “oi!” Method

• When you enter a room with the participants you should think, “oi!”

• This means that you should “Work the room” from the outside -> In

• Your first inclination will be to go where the action is, or where your favorite people are.

• However, we are not here to satisfy that desire for games and friends

• We are here to accompany everyone into positive growth through the community

The “oi!” Method

• Look for the wall flowers and encourage them to come and join the fun

• Look for the downcast and ask them if everything is ok

• Look for the shy and encourage them to accompany you into the mix

• Be patient and always inviting• Work in pairs! This helps.

The Wall Flowers

• We can’t fix the awkwardness of others!• Be gentle and inviting - don’t nag• Learn their names and use them!• Personal invites and group invites• Some things like dancing make people feel uncomfortable

– You might offer to teach them– You might invite them over saying “come on over, you don’t

have to dance.” etc.– You might sacrifice the dance floor to accompany them

(Bring friends, its no pity party)

The Tough Guy/Gal

• There are some people who are too tough or cool for everything less than their own super-coolness

• You might break the ice by asking, “hey did you get tricked into coming?”

• If they say, “No,” then you say, “C’mon we’re doing…x”• If they say, “Yes,” then you might strike up a conversation about

it.– If they want to bash the retreat that’s fine– You should encourage them… “it gets better”– Stay positive and share some of the benefits you are gaining

from it. – Chances are its only an act.

Prince Potty Mouth

• This retreat is for God’s word to be heard in their hearts

• We should encourage positive talk and and good language

• Discourage swearing, complaining, and negative talk (don’t do it yourself)– Use humor– Use optimism– Use each other for support

Small Group Success

• Attitude is everything– Don’t be shy, ask the question, expect the answer!– When you give up, they give up!– Silence is Golden and Awkward

• Don’t panic at silence if they’re not brewing up genius, let the awkwardness of silence provoke an answer.

– Take your time, enjoy the conversation• Read everything before you start, know the gist of where

you are going.• Then go fishing!

Small Group: Fishing

• Start with a nice easy question, “Having fun yet? What did you like?”

• Then follow your guide– Some questions get dismissive answers, those are

nibbles on the fishing line– Some questions will evoke some enthusiasm, that

is a bite– Don’t cut the line and recast a new question– Let the conversation flow until they become tired– Then reel them in with the next question

The Soap Box Star• Remember the lamp, empower them to do all the shining/talking

in the group.• Some people have an answer to everything and can overpower

your SG– This can reduce the rest of the group to “I agree… I agree…

I agree…”– Try to spread around who answers the next question first– If you have a soap box star, ask if anyone disagrees or ask

what the opposing argument is (unless its brutally obvious)– Be kind and encouraging, call on people who are not talking– Before asking “the next question” you might say, “Jack

what’s on your mind?– You can also politely acknowledge a soap box star and

suggest to them, “let’s encourage some other opinions.”

Personal Success• Don’t forget that you’re on retreat too!• Immediately begin praying for the people you

meet.• Stop into the chapel and pray for those who

are struggling• Ask God to help your small group• Be a servant and invest yourself• You will learn a deeper self-less joy• Hopefully you will pass that same joy to

others this same week.

Use the Adult Team

• Finally, you are not alone.• This week you have an amazing adult team to help

you out.– The priests– The Director and Assistants– The Pre-Novices

• Don’t try to solve every problem yourself, use these people for both advice and assistance!

• Thank you for your sacrifice and your hard work!

Any Questions?

Why do cows dress differently? They have their own brands!