leading with ei · turn on the pre-frontal cortex emotional audit 1.what are you thinking? 2.what...
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Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Leading with EmotionalIntelligence: Raising the
Team IQ with EQ
Relly Nadler
December 1, 2011
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
“Every leader we have workedwith has underestimated theirinfluence on others.” - True North
Consequences of this oversight are:1. Under performance of the leader2. Under performing teams
Do you agree, Yes or No?
Teamwork is an UnnaturalAct
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Takes practice and disciplinePoorly facilitated team, Team IQ can godown 1-2 points for each person in group.High IQ people can be quite dumbed downif not well formed or facilitated!
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
You are Under the Spotlight
24/7
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Where do you need to focusyour Spotlight?
Errors 1. Don’t realize you have a spotlight
2. Don’t realize that it is on 24/7
3. Use it in an undisciplined way, focusing on too many things
4. Focus your light on the WRONG things
5. Don’t focus on strengths ENOUGH
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Wired to Connect - Emotionsare Contagious
• “You are the Emotional thermostatfor your team”• “Our emotions mold not just ourexperience but our biology.”• “Nourishing relationships benefitour health while toxic ones act like aslow poison to our health.”Daniel Goleman, Social Intelligence: TheNew Science of Human Relationships
The Brain
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
•Has 100 billion neurons•Each neuron connects to 5,000 to10,000 others
The Mind/LeaderIs an embodied and relational process thatregulates the flow of energy andinformation
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
SelfAwareness
SelfManagement
SocialAwareness
SocialSkills
Self Social
What is EmotionalIntelligence?
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Personal & Social Competencies
Self-Awareness
SocialAwareness
Social SkillsSelf-Management
• Emotional Self-Awareness• Accurate Self-Assessment• Self-Confidence
• Empathy• Organizational
Awareness• Service Orientation
• Self-Control• Trustworthiness• Conscientiousness• Adaptability• Achievement Orientation• Optimism• Initiative
• Developing Others• Leadership• Influence• Communication• Change Catalyst• Conflict Management• Building Bonds• Teamwork &
Collaboration
Are you a Star or Average
Teamwork and CollaborationAverage• Cooperates• Expresses positive expectations• Solicits inputsStar• Encourages Others• Builds Team spirit
Are you a Star or Average?
TrustworthinessAverage• Acts consistently with valuesStar• Publicly admits mistakes• Acts on values in spite of pressure
to do otherwise
InitiativeAverage• Addresses current
opportunities• Ready to act• Makes extra effortStar• Initiates actions for the future
Are you a Star or Average?
EmpathyAverage
• Listens• Actively Listens• Reads non-verbals• Open to diversityStar Performer
• Sees others’ perspectiveand SAYS their perspective• Understands others
Are you Star or Average
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Pete Carroll
Understanding Self Others
Managing Self
Others
“I get more out of you, if I connect with you.Instead of knocking you down…I’m going to
build you up.”
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Brain’s Mirror Neurons
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Executive Derailers
1. Lack of impulse control
2. Inability to work well on team
3. Difficulty in handling change4. Poor interpersonal relationships
Center for Creative Leadership
5. Arrogant – “Smartest Person”
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Steve Jobs
Understanding Self Others
Managing Self
Others
The Power of Vision in spite of Derailers everpresent
Where Did My IQ Go?
Stress EQ IQ
What was I thinking?
Your Brain was hijacked!Now you have 10-15 less IQpoints for decision making.
Copyright 2009, Relly Nadler,Psy.D.
The Hijack
Amygdala
PrefrontalCortex
Emotional Regulation Gone
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Impulse Control is aLimited Capacity
Turn on the Pre-frontal Cortex
Emotional Audit
1.What are you thinking?2.What are you feeling?3.What do want to happen now?4.How are you getting in your ownway?5.What do you need do differentlynow?
Top Performing Teams
6:1 Positive to NegativeInteractions1:1 Questions & Advocacy1:1 Internal & External Focus
Nike: Ask Me 2 Questions
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
White Space Issues
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Negative signs indicate what gets filled in quickly by others. It is usually
inaccurate, judgmental & not giving you or the leader the benefit of the doubt.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Positive signs indicate what you say when you fill in the white spaceproactively with accurate and positive data, talking about opportunities
INTELLIGENCE = Entering through the lines
“If you are not sick and tired of saying the same thing overand over again, you are not saying it enough.”
“If you don’t tell you people what is going on they will thinknothing is going on.” Relly Nadler, Psy.D., 2003-9
Positive, Accurate & Constructive = Not
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Resources
Leading with EI,Amazon, Barnes &
Noble
www.truenorthleadership.com
VoiceAmerica, weeklypodcasts in iTunes:
LeadershipDevelopment news
http://budurl.com/kfza
iPhoneApp
Copyright 2011 Relly Nadler,Psy.D. All Rights Reserved
Relly Nadler, Psy.D.• Emotional Intelligence expert• Leadership Development• Executive Coaching• Executive Team Development806 [email protected]
GET FREE EI Leadership Assessment andSecrets Download at
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