lean in sheryl sandberg - executive book...

Blue Sky Leadership Consulting LLC 2014

Lean In – Sheryl Sandberg

VOL. # ONE ISSUE #6

A Book Review

“”It has been more than two decades since I entered the workforce, and so

much is still the same. It is time for us to face the fact that our revolution

has stalled. The promise of equality is not the same as true equality. A truly

equal world would be one where women ran half our countries and

companies and men ran half our homes.” (P.7)

“Conditions for all women will improve when there are more women in

leadership roles giving strong and powerful voice to their needs and

concerns.” (P.7)

“Fear is at the root of so many of the barriers that women face. Fear of not

being liked. Fear of making the wrong choice. Fear of drawing negative

attention. Fear of overreaching. Fear of being judged. Fear of failure. And

the holy trinity of fear; the fear of being a bad mother/wife/daughter.” (P. 24)

“As former secretary of state Madeleine Albright once said, ‘there’s a special

place in hell for women who don’t help other women.’” (P. 164)

Lean In. Braeuler Consulting works with organizations to leverage Strategic Thinking and Execution Planning and we

encompass many of these principles into our Four DecisionsTM methodology and development of company’s One Page

Strategic Plans. Whatever system or systems you decide to use, I encourage you to understand them fully, implement them

slowly and completely and maintain the discipline and rhythm necessary to see concrete results. Employees tire of “Flavor

of the Month” initiatives. They also thrive on organizational alignment, execution of plans and achievements that garner a

sense of accomplishment.

In 2011 she delivered the commencement address for Barnard College – an all-women’s

liberal arts school in New York City. It was the first time she openly discussed the leadership

ambition gap. Read the conclusion to that speech on Page 25.

“The phenomenon of capable people being plagued by

self-doubt has a name – the imposter syndrome. Both

men and women are susceptible to the impostor

syndrome, but women tend to experience it more

intensely and be more limited by it. ” (P. 29)

Braeuler Consulting

Peter Braeuler Telephone 210.219.9934

[email protected]

Book in a Bite

Key quotes


The Chapters ❖ 2: Sit at the table

o Impostor syndrome

o Shake off self-doubt; fake it – feel self-confident –

smile for an hour and you will feel cheerful

o Grab opportunities and take risks

o Keep your hand up (P. 36)

❖ 3: Success and Likeability

o Positively correlated for men and negatively

correlated for women (Heidi/Howard study P. 40)

o The desire to be liked will hold you back…if you

please everyone, you aren’t making enough

progress.

❖ 4: It’s a Jungle Gym, Not a Ladder

o Ladders are limiting – up, down or off…there are

many ways to get to the top of a jungle gym.

o Eric Schmidt “only one criterion mattered when

picking a job – fast growth. If you are offered a

seat on a rocket ship, you don’t ask what seat. You

just get on.”

o HP study – Men apply if they think they meet 60%

of requirements; women apply only if they think

they meet 100%. “Women need to shift from

thinking “I’m not ready to do that” to thinking “I

want to do that – I’ll learn by doing it.” (P. 62)

❖ Belief 4: I choose to succeed

o Committed vs. compliant

o I choose to change causes a disconnect – the more

we believe something is true the less likely we are

to believe the opposite is true. (p.24)

❖ 5: Are You My Mentor?

o If you have to ask, the answer is

probably no.

o “We need to stop telling them, “Get a

mentor and you will excel.” Instead, we

need to tell them, “Excel and you will

get a mentor.” (P. 69)

o “Any male leader who is serious about

moving toward a more equal world can

make this a priority and be part of the

solution. It should be a badge of honor

for men to sponsor women.” (P. 71)

❖ 6: Seek and Speak Your Truth

o “Communication works best when we

combine appropriateness with

authenticity, finding that sweet spot

where opinions are not brutally honest

but delicately honest.” (P. 78)

o There is my point of view (my truth)

and someone else’s point of view (their

truth). Rarely is there one absolute

truth.

o Speak openly about your own

weaknesses; use humor to deliver an

honest message; share emotions;

Introduction

Keys

A truly equal world – women ran half our

countries and companies and men ran half

our homes. This book talks about how to

get there.

Book in a Bite

Lean In…..

• Leadership ambition gap

• Sit at the table

• Success and likeability

• It’s a jungle gym, not a ladder

• Are you my mentor?

• Seek and speak your truth

• Don’t leave before you leave

• Make your partner a real partner

• The myth of doing it all

• Let’s start talking about it

• Working together toward

equality

The Chapters

LEAN IN – In a nutshell:

We need more women in power. It’s the only

thing that will stop the constant questions

about whether women can and should be

professionally equal to men. We’re all

socialized from birth for women to be sweet

and nurturing and men to be tough and

aggressive, and for women to be valued for

the care they give while men are valued for

their external accomplishments. It’s not fair

to either men or women. We need to openly

acknowledge and discuss the pervasiveness

and effects of these gender roles so we can

move past them.

(MagicCookie Blog Aug 1, 2013)


❖ 10. Let’s Start Talking About It o “…there are differences between men and

women both in their behavior and in the way

their behavior is perceived by others…I could

see these dynamics playing out in the

workforce, and that, in order to fix the

problems, we needed to be able to talk about

gender without people thinking we were

crying for help, asking for special treatment,

or about to sue.” (P. 145)

o Talking can transform minds, which can

transform behaviors, which can transform

institutions.

o All of us, myself included, are biased,

whether we admit or not. (P. 152)

o Every job will demand some sacrifice. The

key is to avoid unnecessary sacrifice.

o Social gains are never handed out. They must

be seized. (P. 157)

Braeuler Consulting VOL. # ONE ISSUE #6

Book in a Bite

❖ 7: Don’t Leave Before You Leave

o “Of all the ways women hold

themselves back, perhaps the most

pervasive is that they leave before they

leave.” (P. 93)

o The time to scale back is when a break

is needed – not before, and certainly not

years in advance. The months and

years leading up to having children are

not the time to lean back, but the critical

time to lean in.

❖ 8: Make Your Partner a Real Partner

o “When mothers care for their children,

it’s “parenting”, but when fathers care

for their children, the government

deems it a “child care arrangement”.

o Have you ever heard men saying they

are heading home to “babysit” their

children? Or list their children as

hobbies?

o We need to encourage men to lean in to

their families.

o “We need more men to sit at the

table…the kitchen table.” (P. 120)

❖ 9. The Myth of Doing It All o Tina Fey says the worst question you

can ask a woman is not age or weight

but “How do you juggle it all?”

Everyone has multiple responsibilities.

o The best way to make room for life and

career is to make choices deliberately –

to set limits and stick to them.

o Done is better than perfect.

o The secret is there is no secret – just

doing the best you can with what

you’ve got.

“Staying quiet and fitting in may have been all the first generations of women who

entered corporate America could do; in some cases, it might still be the safest path.

But this strategy is not paying off for women as a group. Instead, we need to speak

out, identify the barriers that are holding women back, and find solutions” (P. 146-7)

Born: August 28, 1969

Raised in Miami Beach Florida

BA, MBA – Harvard University

Lives in Northern California

Married to David Goldberg – 2 children

Worked for Google

COO of Facebook since 2008

Became 8th member of BOD in 2012

The Chapters


[email protected]

Book in a Bite

Chapter 1: The Leadership Ambition Gap -

What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

❖ 36% of men want to reach the C-suite, compared to only 18% of the women (2012 McKinsey survey) ❖ Millennial women were also less likely than their male peers to characterize themselves as “leaders,”

“visionaries,” “self-confident,” and “willing to take risks.” ❖ Professional ambition is expected of men but is optional – or worse, sometimes even a negative – for

women.

❖ “Writing this book is not just me encouraging others to lean in. This is me leaning in. Writing this book

is what I would do if I weren’t afraid.” (P. 26)

Take Aways

THERE NEED TO BE MANY VOICES

CALLING FOR SUCH EQUALITY –

FEMALE VOICES, MALE VOICES –

THIS IS ONLY ONE BOOK OF MANY!

True equality

The Chapters …..

1. People with power will not

give it up, or even share it

willingly. It must be seized by

those who do not yet have

such power. 2. Women have to lean in – but

like women, not like men…

this is a very delicate tightrope

to walk. 3. Some men are going to have

to become mentors to some

women. And these men are

going to have to be very

intentional about this… 4. Seize your opportunities – find

a rocket ship and get on board.

Source: 15MinuteBusinessBooks.com

❖ 11. Working Together Toward Equality o All of us- men and women alike – have to understand and

acknowledge how stereotypes and biases cloud our beliefs

and perpetuate the status quo. Instead of ignoring our

differences, we need to accept and transcend them. (P. 159)

o Queen Bee phenomenon

o Mommy wars (working inside and out of the home)

o There is always an opportunity cost in every decision

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