living a more joyful and updated copy
TRANSCRIPT
Sula Goldenberg, LMFT
"Living a more Joyful and Authentic
Life: Finding the
Courage to Create Change"
Living a more Joyful and Authentic Life: Finding the Courage to Create Change
Life long quest Aim is not necessarily “finding happiness” What is happiness, after all? …a very subjective construct…Turning the focus inwardSearching for personal meaning, for our true self Increasing internal peace
Living a more Joyful and Authentic Life: Finding the Courage to Create Change
In my journey…People (mentors
and patients)
Books
Circumstances(Good and bad)
Living a more Joyful and Authentic Life: Finding the Courage to Create Change
Signs and symptoms that change is in order:
1. Psychological and emotional
2. Physiological Stepping up and showing up for our lives:
1. Awareness
2. Change
3. Transformation
AwarenessSigns of an ailing soul
What is the language of the soul?
AwarenessPsychological Symptoms
Sadness
“Life is just too hard… I cannot find joy”
•Difficulty Sleeping or Sleeping Too Much •Difficulty Concentrating •Feeling of Hopelessness or Helplessness •Overwhelming and Uncontrollable Negative Thoughts •Loss of Appetite or Significant Increase in Appetite •Increase in Irritability, Aggression or Anger •Thoughts That Your Life is not Worth Living
AwarenessPsychological Symptoms
Anxiety
•Surge of overwhelming panic.•Feeling of losing control or going crazy.•Heart palpitations or chest pain.•Feeling like you're going to pass out.•Trouble breathing.•Hyperventilation.•Hot flashes or chills.•Trembling or shaking “Something bad may happen…
I need to be prepared”
Psychological SymptomsInsomnia
•Inability to go to sleep•Inability to stay asleep•Waking up too early•Waking up not feeling rested
Psychological SymptomsAngerFeeling as if blood is boiling
Unable to think before you do or say
something
Feeling as if people are against you
Blaming others
“Why do they do this to me!This is not fair!”
Psychological symptoms
Addictions“I need to have one
more piece of chocolate, One more drink… one sleeping pill
will help me sleep, ormaybe two…
Emotional symptoms
“I have everything to be happy yet…
Something is missing in my life”
Emotional Symptoms
“Others have it better than me…
it is not fair”
Emotional symptoms
“I feel inexplicable mood states”
Emotional SymptomsHe said…She said…
She does not love me…They have it against me…
Nobody gets it…I feel so alone…
Emotional Symptoms
“Why does everything bad happens to me?”
Physical Symptoms
Psychological status may influencephysiology of the body
…and diseases may influence psychological status
Physical SymptomsDuring chronic stress adrenal glands release hormones called cortisol, adrenaline, norepinephrine. Adrenaline causes the heart to beat faster and raises blood pressureCortisol causes the inner lining of blood vessels to function irregularly; also connected to appetite fluctuation and weight gain Brain communicates stress to the enteric nervous system (nerves found in the lining of the gut)
Physical Symptoms Respiratory problems Skin problems Digestive problems Chronic diseases Autoimmune system problems Aches and pains
Disclaimer: This information is for this presentation purposes only
See a physician anytime you have health care concerns
Physical Symptoms
Respiratory problems Constant and recurrent colds Asthma Allergies
Physical Symptoms
Skin problems Cold sores Psoriasis Eczema Skin rashes
Physical Symptoms
Digestive problems Ulcer Reflux Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) Constipation, diarrhea
Physical Symptoms
Chronic Diseases Diabetes Asthma Arthritis Obesity
Physical Symptoms
Autoimmune system problems Multiple Sclerosis (MS) Diabetes Mellitus (DM) Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA) Lupus
Physical Symptoms
Aches and pains Neck Back pain Shoulders Jaws etc.
Change and Transformation We all have an Ally She is the one that knows She is loyal to the She is fluent in the languages of dreams She contains our instincts She carries the bundles for healing
inside
Change and Transformation
Where do I start? Right where I am
Change and Transformation
When do I start?
Change and Transformation
Do not need to see all the way out
Change and Transformation
But…what do I do? At first: NOTHING …Just notice
Change and Transformation
Wake up from being unconscious
Change and Transformation
Ask questions… No need to have the answers Suspend judgmentPractice compassion
Change and Transformation STOP AND REFLECTWhat is happening? How do I make life comealive again?
Awareness What do I see? What do I hear? What do I feel?
Re-attaching our souls
Awareness Who am I? We all receive maps from parents, religious sources, history etc. Sometimes these maps are helpful and rewarding, sometimes they are not. Am I living someone else’s map?
Awareness
Authenticity: getting back to the guiding “source”, to the light, to our Psyche (Greek word meaning soul)
Awareness
Pay attention Listen to your inner voice What does your deeper self desire? What is my work here?
Awareness
What are my dreams about?
Write them downAsk: what about it
resonates with my life now
Awareness Let’s practice…Your Inner Guide Get centered – deep breath Finding the wise inside
Awareness Once we have awareness… change is a possibility
Change Conscious decision to:
Show up for our life Give ourselves permission… Take responsibility for our happiness
Change For change to take place…
Awareness Action1 2
Change
Does not need to be monumental, it starts with a single step
Change
Messy
Non Linear
Change
Obstacles: Fear
Change
Obstacles: What will others say?
Change
Will that stop us? What are the options? Flight from this task will only perpetuate our symptoms
Living partially and fearfully is a form of dying
Change Crossing the threshold of fear
“Change happens when the pain
of staying the same is greater than
the pain to change” Tony Robins
Change
How long will it take?Ongoing work…
ChangeThe Self
Each of us need to take An active role
Who is in charge?YOU
Change Who else can help?Professional help: Psychotherapist Psychiatrist Curandero, sobador etc…
Change Who else can help? Close connections Who do you trust?Your friend?Your family?Your partner?Your-self?
ChangeThe Self
Going back to the source:
Change
Our soul seeks expression
Transformation Change + daily practice = Transformation ...But, what does it mean?
Every day is an opportunity to tend to our garden
Transformation
Courage, effort and practice…Pulls us from our comfort zone
TRANSFORMATION
Transformation- Do we need to open a dooror close one? - The task each one of us needs to address is different
Transformation Redeeming the purpose of our souls’ journey
Homecoming
Transformation
We predict the future by creating it
Giving Credit Inspiration and some thoughts adapted from: