Manners Matter

that

An etiquette guide for interacting with people with disabilities

• Togettheattentionofapersonwhoisdeaf,taphimorheron theshoulderorwaveyourhand.Lookdirectlyatthepersonand speakclearly,slowly,andexpressivelytodetermineiftheperson canreadyourlips.Ifso,placeyourselfsothatyoufacethelight

sourceandkeephands,food,andcigarettesawayfromyour mouthwhenspeaking.

RelaxDon’tbeembarrassedifyouhappentouseacommonexpressionsuchas“Seeyoulater,”or“Didyouhearthelatest?”thatseemtorelatetoaperson’sdisability.Youmightbesurprisedtoknowthatmanypeoplewhoareblindsay“Seeyoulater!”Ifyouareunsureofwhattosayordo,don’tbeafraidtoaskquestions.

Further ConsiderationTofindoutmoreabouttheetiquetteofinteractingwithpeoplewithdisabilities,pleaseconsultthefollowingsources:

National Organization on Disabilitywww.nod.org

United Spinal Association www.unitedspinal.org/pdf/DisabilityEtiquette.pdf

U.S. Dept. of Laborwww.dol.gov/odep/pubs/fact/comucate.htm

VSA artswww.vsarts.org/x523.xml

Agency for Persons with Disabilities4030 Esplanade Way, Suite 380

Tallahassee, FL 32399-09501-866-APD-CARES (1-866-273-2273)

(850) 488-4257apdcares.org

MAY2010

WordsItishelpfultorememberthatapersonwithadisabilityis—firstandforemost—aperson.Thedisabilitydoesnotdefinetheperson.Phrasessuchas“thedisabled,”“theretarded,”or“theblind”areinappropriatebecausetheydonotreflecttheindividualityordignityofpeoplewithdisabilities.Sois“normalperson,”becausethetermimpliesthatapersonwithadisabilityisn’tnormal.Avoidlabels.

Instead,usepeople-first language,whichemphasizesthepersonratherthanthedisability.Examplesinclude“personwithadisability,”“personwhoisblind,”and“personwithanintellectualdisability.”Positivelanguageaffirmsandempowers,whilenegativelanguagelimitsandsegregates.Thereisnoperfectterminology,butasyoureadthetableofphrasesbelow,notehowthepositivephrasesputthepersonfirst.

AFFIRMATIVE PHRASES NEGATIVE PHRASESpersonwithadisability thedisabled,thehandicappedpersonwithcerebralpalsy CPvictimpersonwhohasmultiplesclerosis afflictedbyMSpersonwhoisdeaf,hardofhearing

thedeaf,suffersfromahearingloss

personwhoisblind,visuallyimpaired theblind

personwithcognitivedisabilities,intellectualanddevelopmentaldisabilities,mentalretardation

theretarded,mentallydefective,feebleminded

personwithepilepsy,seizuredisorder epileptic

personwhousesawheelchair confinedorrestrictedtoawheelchair,wheelchair-bound

personwhoisphysicallydisabled crippled,lame,deformedpersonwithpsychiatricdisability crazy,nuts,thementallyillunabletospeak,usessyntheticspeech

dumb,mute,nonverbal,noncommunicative

successful,productive hasovercomeadisabilityshesaysshehasadisability headmitsthathehasadisability

ActionsIfactionsspeaklouderthanwords,it’simportantnottoactinawaythatshoutsyourinsensitivity!Afewsimpleruleswillhelpyoutoshowyourrespectandsupporttoapersonwithdisabilitiesthroughyouractions.

• Speakdirectlytoapersonwithadisability,ratherthantothesignlanguageinterpreterorcompanion.

• Whenintroduced,extendyourhandtoshakehandswithapersonwithadisability.Peoplewithlimitedhanduseorwhowearartificiallimbscanusuallyshakehands.Ashakewithalefthandisperfectlyokay.

• Whenmeetingapersonwhoisvisuallyimpaired,alwaysidentifyyourselfandotherswhomaybewithyou.Inagroupsetting,identifythepersontowhomyouarespeaking.

• Ifyouofferassistance,waituntilthe offerisaccepted.Thenlistentoorask forinstructions.• Treatadultsasadults.Addresspeoplewho

havedisabilitiesbytheirfirstnamesonlywhenextendingthesamefamiliaritytoallothers.Neverpatronizepeoplewhousewheelchairsbypattingthemontheheadorshoulder.

• Leaningorhangingontoaperson’swheelchairisconsideredannoying.Apersonwhousesawheelchair,scooter,orcane

considerstheequipmentaspartoftheirpersonalspace.• Whenspeakingtosomeonewhousesawheelchair,scooter,or

crutches,placeyourselfateye-levelinfrontofthepersonto makeconversation.• Listenattentivelywhentalkingwithapersonwhohasdifficulty

speaking.Bepatientandwaitforthepersontofinish,ratherthanspeakingfororcorrectinghimorher.Ifnecessary,askshort

questionsthatrequireshortanswers,orperhapsanodorshake ofthehead.Neverpretendtounderstand;instead,repeatwhat youhaveunderstoodandallowthepersontorespond.