mental strength not mental breakdown

P bar Y Safety Consultants

Mental Strength Control Emotions (Anxiety)

Have you been finding that you cry at the drop of a hat? Get angry unnecessarily? Maybe you just feel nervous all the time. Whatever you may be feeling, you should begin by

understanding that experiencing emotions is a normal part of human living. There is nothing inherently “wrong” with any emotion. You do not have to eliminate or ignore your feelings to

handle them. Becoming emotionally stronger is much like building physical strength. Begin slowly, be consistent, build endurance, and keep it up.


2 Types of mental health good and bad

• Just like talking about physical strength doesn’t stigmatize someone with a physical health issue like diabetes, talking about mental strength doesn’t stigmatize people with mental illness. Everyone has the ability to build mental strength, regardless of whether they have depression, anxiety, ADHD, or some other mental health issue.

• That’s not to minimize the fact that mental health issues may add an extra degree of difficulty to building mental strength. A person with depression, for example, may experience more negative thoughts than others, but that doesn’t mean depressed people can’t grow stronger.

• People with a mental illness aren’t mentally weak. In fact, many of them are incredibly strong. And just like everyone else, they possess the ability to create positive change in their lives.


The glue that holds YOU together

Psychology often discusses mental health — but what’s not often discussed is a clear definition of mental strength. To me, mental strength means that you regulate your emotions, manage your thoughts, and behave in a positive manner, despite your circumstances. Developing mental strength is about finding the courage to live according to your values and being bold enough to create your own definition of success.


More than

Mental strength involves more than just willpower; it requires hard work and commitment. It’s about establishing healthy habits and choosing to devote your time and energy to self-improvement.


• ‘’Circuit-breaking.’’ This stage often occurs soon after the trauma and is sometimes described as feeling “numb” or “in shock.” When your body is overloaded, as with traumatic events, your systems shut down. Your brain loses between 50-90% of its peak functioning. Your other body systems may also shut down, so that you experience sudden symptoms, such as sleeplessness or headaches, that you didn’t have previously. You may also see other symptoms you had subside, such as arthritis and even acne.

• ‘’Return of feelings.’’ Once the initial numbness subsides -- and that varies dramatically according to each individual -- feelings will return. They may gradually return, or they may hit you all at once. You may also experience wild fluctuation between emotional states during this stage, where your feelings vary day-to-day and even moment-to-moment.

• ‘’Constructive action.’’ This stage is strongly linked to stage 2, and you will find it difficult to do one without the other. As you become more in touch with your feelings, take actions to restore your sense of power and meaning. For example, if you used to be in an emotionally abusive relationship, you might wish to volunteer at the local women’s shelter. Taking actions that are meaningful to you will counteract the sense of helplessness or loss of control that often underlies emotional frailty.

• ‘’Reintegration.’’ This stage cannot occur until the first three have been experienced. In this stage, you become in touch with your emotions and values. You learn to practice “value-congruent” living, in which you live according to your core principles (honesty, compassion, assertiveness, etc.).


What is in your CORE in YOUEvaluate Your Core BeliefsWe’ve all developed core beliefs about ourselves, our lives and the world in general. Core beliefs develop over time and largely depend upon our past experiences. Whether you’re aware of your core beliefs or not, they influence your thoughts, your behavior and emotions.• Sometimes, core beliefs are inaccurate and unproductive. For example, if

you believe that you’ll never succeed in life, you may be less apt to apply for new jobs — and inadvertently, you may not present yourself well on job interviews. Therefore, your core beliefs may become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

• Identify and evaluate your core beliefs. Look for beliefs that are black and white, and then find exceptions to the rule. Very few things in life are “always” or “never” true. Modifying core beliefs requires purposeful intention and hard work, but it can change the entire course of your life.


Bad events happen to good people

• Mindfulness techniques can help you stay present in the moment as you discuss a difficult or traumatic event. Using mindfulness techniques can help you regulate your emotions so that you don't break down. They can keep you from ruminating, or "obsessing" over a particular feeling or emotion. They can also reduce anxiety and depressive symptoms, making it easier for you to process your feelings


Learn and know the past• Learn from your past. When you think about your past experiences,

recognize them as learning experiences and sources of strength, instead of viewing them as weakness. Even difficult and stressful events can teach you how to develop your emotional resilience and respond more effectively in the future. Here are some questions you could consider asking yourself: What kinds of experiences or events are the most stressful for me?

• What were my reactions to these experiences?• In what ways have I been affected by these experiences?• What have I learned about myself and how I interact with others from this

experience?• Would it be helpful for me to help someone else process a similar

experience?• How have I overcome obstacles in the past?• What can I apply from those actions to future obstacles?


We all have holes but fill them• Accept vulnerability. Developing emotional strength is not the same as

becoming invulnerable. In fact, vulnerability is crucial in developing your ability to connect with others and to fully experience and accept yourself. Vulnerability means being open to experiences, and also accepting that they may not work out as you hope. Without vulnerability, it is hard to be open to experiences that have a fundamental element of uncertainty to them, such as love, trust, creativity.

• Try to reject perfectionism. Perfectionism is often confused with healthy ambition or a desire for excellence. In reality, perfectionism often comes from a fear of vulnerability, the desire to “be perfect” so that we don’t experience loss or fear. Perfectionism holds you to an impossible standard and demands that you get others’ praise. Vulnerability will allow you to strive for success and achievement while understanding that setbacks happen


Breath in BREATH OUT

Expend Mental Energy WiselyWasting brain power ruminating about things you can’t control drains mental energy quickly. The more you think about negative problems that you can’t solve, the less energy you’ll have leftover for creative endeavors. For example, sitting and worrying about the weather forecast isn’t helpful. If a major storm is headed your way, worrying about it won’t prevent it. You can, however, choose to prepare for it. Focus on what is only within your control.• Save your mental energy for productive tasks, such as solving

problems or setting goals. When your thoughts aren’t productive, make a conscious effort to shift your mental energy to more helpful topics. The more you practice expending your mental energy wisely, the more it will become a habit.


Life is not a movie in any form• The phrase "shoulding on yourself" was invented by psychologist Clayton Barbeau to

describe the cognitive distortion of feeling like you are obligated to do something. It usually happens when you compare your actions or feelings to an external standard.

When you use “should” statements, you can end up feeling guilty and ashamed of yourself, instead of having the energy to change your behavior in ways that satisfy your values. When faced with “should” thoughts, examine why you feel like you “should” do this or that. For example, if you are considering going on a diet because you “should” lose weight, think about why you “should” do that. Is it because you have a particular health goal in mind? Has your doctor talked with you about your weight? Do you want to look a certain way? Or do you feel this “should” because you feel pressured by others to look or behave a certain way?

• Society often pressures individuals with many “shoulds” that we may feel we need to conform to: You should look like the people in magazines. You should wear a certain clothes size. You should have a lot of/no sex. You should be happy. You should be a “good” partner/parent/sibling/student/employee/employer. Giving in to that pressure from others, rather than doing things for ourselves because they align with our values, can leave us feeling emotionally wiped out.


Re-tune your thoughts• Stop what you’re doing and re-focus. In the heat of an emotional moment, it can be easy

to get swept up by what you’re feeling. If the emotion is positive, it can feel great, but if it is a feeling of sadness or anxiety, it can quickly spiral out of control. Take a break from whatever is going on and focus on your body’s five senses. This will help remind you of the present, and can help anxiety or anger from storming out of control. Try taking stock of your body’s reactions, but don’t judge them. For example, if you’re feeling anxious all of a sudden, think about what your body is feeling. “My skin feels hot. My heart is beating really fast. I am breathing shallowly. My hands feel shaky.” Don’t focus on these feelings. Just notice them and then let them pass.

• Refocusing on your present moment may also help reduce “automatic reactivity.” Your brain forms habits of reacting to stimuli, including emotional experiences. The brain instantly activates these patterns whenever that stimulus, such as anxiety or anger, occurs. Shifting your focus back to your present sensory experience breaks that circuit in your brain. If you practice this shifting consistently, it will become a new “habit” for your brain.

• “Self-observation,” the practice of paying attention to your own mind’s awareness and experience, can help you tease out the multiple things that may be happening within a single experience. For example, many people are unaware that “awareness” actually consists of many information paths. Often, we experience an emotional reaction as a jumble of feelings and sensory experiences that can feel overwhelming. Slowing down and refocusing on some experience in the present, such as what you’re seeing, hearing, and smelling, can help you restructure your brain’s old habits and learn to see these different “information streams.”


Inner self

• Self-compassion. Sometimes, people feel emotionally weak because fears have crowded out other thoughts about themselves, such as being worthy of love, acceptance, and happiness. These fears contribute to anxiety (“Will others accept me?”) and depression (“I’m not worth anything”). Practicing self-compassion will help you learn to love and accept yourself, and that will make it easier for you to become stronger in your emotional interactions with others


It is really about SELF

• Self-kindness. This is the opposite of self-criticism. We’re often taught to strive for perfection, and that a lack of perfection is a failure. However, it's much kinder to view yourself (and others) as a "work in progress." Research has actually showed that perfectionism can hold you back from true achievement. Emotional strength comes from extending to ourselves the same understanding that we would to a friend. After all, if a close friend made a mistake, you would probably acknowledge the wrongdoing but still respond with forgiveness and love. Try doing this for yourself, too.


LOOK AT THOSE BRAIN MUSCLES

• Mental strength training isn’t some new age phenomenon that will go out of style. The idea that you can learn to regulate your thoughts, manage your emotions, and behave productively despite your circumstances is backed by research. Building your mental muscle is a lot like building physical muscle. If you want to become physically stronger, you’ll need healthy habits – like going to the gym. You'll also have to give up unhealthy habits – like eating junk food. Building mental strength requires healthy habits - like practicing gratitude - while also giving up unhealthy behavior – like giving up after the first failure.


Your ATTITUDE in the Key• Replace Negative Thoughts with Productive Thoughts

Although most of us don’t spend time thinking about our thoughts, increasing your awareness of your thinking habits proves useful in building resilience. Exaggerated, negative thoughts, such as, “I can’t ever do anything right,” hold you back from reaching your full potential. Catch your negative thoughts before they spiral out of control and influence your behavior.

• Identify and replace overly negative thoughts with thoughts that are more productive. Productive thoughts don’t need to be extremely positive, but should be realistic. A more balanced thought may be, “I have some weaknesses, but I also have plenty of strengths.” Changing your thoughts requires constant monitoring, but the process can be instrumental in helping you become your best self.


We are ALL on the same planet• Common humanity. This is the opposite of self-isolation. It can be easy to

believe that we are the only ones who have experienced pain from our mistakes and life experiences, as though nobody else has experienced the same grief or done something as wrong as we have. Acknowledging your common humanity means recognizing that pain and suffering are part of the shared human experience, and that allows you to approach your own experiences with less judgment. For example, it can be easy to lapse into negative self-talk that isolates you and your experience from others, e.g., "Nobody could ever be interested in me because I'm such a failure." This language unfairly totalizes: you are not "a failure" simply because you may fail at something. It also does not acknowledge that everyone fails from time to time. It holds you to a higher standard than anyone else, which isn't fair to you (or them).[Instead, try reframing this self-talk. "I did not accomplish such-and-such a goal when I had planned to. Everyone has setbacks from time to time, including me."


Practice not necessarily acceptTolerating DiscomfortBeing mentally strong doesn’t mean you don’t experience emotions. In fact, mental strength requires you to become acutely aware of your emotions so you can make the best choice about how to respond. Mental strength is about accepting your feelings without being controlled by them.• Mental strength also involves an understanding of when it makes sense to behave

contrary to your emotions. For example, if you experience anxiety that prevents you from trying new things or accepting new opportunities, try stepping out of your comfort zone if you want to continue to challenge yourself. Tolerating uncomfortable emotions takes practice, but it becomes easier as your confidence grows.

• Practice behaving like the person you’d like to become. Instead of saying, “I wish I could be more outgoing,” choose to behave in a more outgoing manner, whether you feel like it or not. Some discomfort is often necessary for greater gain, and tolerating that discomfort will help make your vision a reality, one small step at a time.


Faking to making it right for YOU• Use “I”-statements. This will help you own your emotions without

“mind-reading” or making others feel blamed. For example, if your partner forgot your birthday, don’t assume that it is because s/he doesn’t care about you and react based on that. Instead, use an “I”-statement to state how you feel: “I felt hurt when you forgot my birthday. I’d like to talk about what happened.” Rather than assigning blame and making the other person defensive, you’ve expressed your feelings and invited the other person to share their experience. you wait until you feel like making a change in your emotional life, you may wait a long time. Practice behaving as if you already have made progress. Learning to tolerate the discomfort and uncertainty from new ways of thinking and behaving is a great way to become stronger emotionally


Ruminating

• Ruminating is a common response to many emotions, especially feelings of sadness or anger. When you ruminate, you obsess about things. You think about a particular situation, thought, or feeling over and over again. It’s like a broken record that keeps playing the same 5 seconds of a song. Ruminating can keep you from coming up with a helpful solution to a problem. It can also trap you in a cycle of negative thinking that can lead to depression and stress. Perfectionism can foster ruminating. So can an “excessive relational focus,” where you overvalue your relationships so much that you will do anything to keep them, even when that is costly or unhealthy.


Two type of folks• There aren’t two categories of people – the mentally strong and

the mentally weak. Instead, everyone possesses mental strength to some degree and we all have the ability to become stronger. Just like you have to keep working out to stay physically strong, mental strength requires ongoing exercise and practice.

• When it comes to physical strength, someone may have a stronger upper body than lower body, or a stronger right arm compared to the left arm. Similarly, we’re likely to excel in some areas of mental strength, while struggling with others. A person who is able to manage her emotions in most areas of her life, may struggle with one or two sore subjects that really trigger her to behave unproductively. Addressing the areas where we can grow stronger can help us improve our overall mental fitness.


Reflect on Your Progress Daily

• Today’s busy world doesn’t lend itself to making much time available for quiet reflection. Create time to reflect upon your progress toward developing mental strength. At the end of each day, ask yourself what you’ve learned about your thoughts, emotions and behavior. Consider what you hope to improve upon or accomplish tomorrow.

• Developing mental strength is a work in progress. There is always room for improvement, and at times this will seem more difficult than at other times. Reflecting upon your progress can reinforce your ability to reach your definition of success while living according to your values.


Show the world

Mentally Strong People Behave Like Robots• Being mentally strong doesn’t mean you shouldn’t cry at

funerals or gush at adorable babies just so you can appear tough. Rather than suppressing emotions, building mental strength increases our awareness of them.

• We make our best decisions in life when we’re in control of our emotions – rather than allowing our emotions to control us. Mentally strong people are able to recognize when their feelings are likely to lead to unhealthy behavior and they proactively take steps to regulate those emotions.


Visualize not Fantasize • Use visualization. Visualizing a calming, relaxing experience can help you regain control over

your emotional responses. You may find that this technique takes a little practice, but it can help you transform stressing thoughts into thoughts you feel more comfortable handling. Begin by choosing your “safe place.” This can be any place you can imagine that you find relaxing and peaceful. It could be a beach, a spa, a mountaintop, or any place you think will help you feel safe and relaxed.

• Find a place to practice visualization. If you can, find a quiet, comfortable place to use your visualization. It should be a place where you will not be interrupted for a few minutes.

• Close your eyes and imagine yourself in your safe place. Imagine what it looks like. What is going on there? What does it smell like? What sounds do you hear? Try to immerse yourself in your safe place.

• Breathe slowly and evenly. Try to relax muscles if you feel they’re tense. If you feel awkward or anxious, don’t judge yourself for that. Just try to imagine yourself in your calming place and what it feels like to relax.

• Imagine your negative emotion as a physical object. You may feel strange trying this at first, but keep with it. Imagine that negative feeling as something that you can remove from your visualized safe place. For example, you might imagine that your anger is a flame. Flames can’t burn without oxygen. Imagine that anger as a flame and watch it as it sputters out. Or, you could imagine a feeling of stress as a stick. You can throw that stick far away from your safe beach and imagine that stress leaving you as it goes.


Learn and RE LEARN

• Learn to recognize cognitive distortions. In the moment, it can be easy to get caught up in habitual ways of responding to an emotion, even when they’re unhealthy. These responses often work together to leave you feeling loaded down by your feelings. Learning to recognize some common “traps” that you might fall into can help you become more emotionally resilient. Catastrophizing, overgeneralizing, and all-or-nothing thinking are three common distortions


No Mountains or Mole Climbing• Recognize and challenge Catastrophizing. This happens when an event or

experience -- usually insignificant -- gets blown out of proportion. Your thoughts begin to spiral out of control until you end up at the absolute worst-case scenario. This can lead you to feeling angry, sad, or anxious. For example, imagine that you call your romantic partner and s/he doesn’t answer the phone. You call back in a few minutes and get voicemail again. A catastrophizing thought might start snowballing: “S/he isn’t answering the phone. S/he’s probably mad at me. I don’t even know what I did wrong. S/he isn’t telling me what I did wrong. S/he doesn’t want to talk to me. Maybe s/he is bored with me.”

• Challenge catastrophizing thoughts by not letting your mind jump from one thought to the next until you’ve examined the evidence for your assumption. For example, in this example, a good challenge could look like this: “My partner isn’t answering the phone. S/he wasn’t mad at me earlier today, so s/he probably isn’t mad at me now. If s/he is, I can ask her/him about it later and talk things through.” You could also remind yourself that people have many logical reasons for not answering the phone at any particular moment: being occupied, driving, not seeing/hearing the phone, etc


Over not UNDER• Overgeneralization. Overgeneralizing happens when you make a general

statement about a specific situation. This can lead you to holding unhealthy (and inaccurate) beliefs about yourself. For example, imagine that you are not offered a job after having an interview. A generalizing view of this could be something like, “I’m such a loser. I really screwed up that interview. I’m never going to get a job.”

• Challenge overgeneralizing thoughts by sticking to the evidence and specifics. You have no evidence to suggest you’re a “loser.” The usual reasons for not getting a job are that your skills aren’t the right match for the company, or your personality might not mesh with others there. Maybe you did botch the interview, maybe you didn’t. This specific incident, however, does not apply to every facet of you as a person. Think about the situation as specifically as possible, and focus on what you can do to change the specifics in the future: “I don’t think I did a great job at that interview. I was really nervous. Next time, I will practice with a friend before I go in for an interview


It is not a competition• All-or-nothing thinking. With all-or-nothing thinking, you don’t allow yourself (or,

sometimes, anyone else) to land in the middle. If things are not perfect, they’re a failure. All-or-nothing thinking can make useful critique hard to handle. It can also lead you to feel sad or worthless about yourself because you’re holding yourself to an impossible, unproductive standard. For example, consider that you are on a diet. You go out for lunch with a friend, and you end up having a piece of cake for dessert. An all-or-nothing response would see this as a failure, and could lead to harsh judgments of yourself: “I totally blew my diet with this cake. I knew I couldn’t handle this new plan. I guess I should just eat anything I want.”

• Challenge all-or-nothing thinking by treating yourself compassionately. Would you harshly judge a friend for eating a slice of cake? Unlikely. So why would you do that to yourself? Avoid looking success as either/or, where everything has to go perfectly to achieve success. Try looking at success as and, an ongoing process of growth and change: “I ate that piece of cake, which won’t help me with my diet goals, and this isn’t a catastrophe. I’ll eat a healthy dinner to get myself back on track


Get up SHAKE that body

As well as the many physical benefits, exercise is also one of the easiest and most effective ways of improving your mental health. A little regular exercise can have a profound effect on all aspects of your emotional well-being. It can relieve stress, ease depression and anxiety, improve your memory, help you sleep better, and boost your overall mood. But you don’t have to be a fitness fanatic to reap the benefits. No matter your age or fitness level, you can use enjoyable physical activities to improve your emotional health and change your life for the better.


• Easing stress and anxiety, reducing tension. A twenty-minute bike ride won’t sweep away all of life’s troubles, but exercising regularly helps you take charge of anxiety and reduce stress, anger, and frustration. Exercise can also serve as a distraction to your worries, allowing you to find some quiet time and break out of the cycle of negative thoughts that feed anxiety, depression, and other mental and emotional problems.

• Lifting your mood and relieving depression. Exercise releases endorphins, powerful chemicals in your brain that energize your spirits and make you feel good. In fact, exercise can treat mild to moderate depression as effectively as antidepressant medication—but without the side-effects, of course. As well as relieving depression, research has shown that maintaining an exercise schedule can prevent you from relapsing.

• Sharpening brainpower. The same endorphins that make you feel better also help you concentrate and feel mentally sharp for tasks at hand. Exercise also stimulates the growth of new brain cells and helps prevent age-related decline.

• Increasing self-esteem. Regular activity is an investment in your mind, body, and soul. When it becomes habit, it can foster your sense of self-worth and make you feel strong and powerful. You’ll feel better about your appearance and, by meeting even small exercise goals, you’ll feel a sense of achievement.

• Improving sleep. Even short bursts of exercise in the morning or afternoon can help regulate your sleep patterns. If you prefer to exercise at night, relaxing exercises such as yoga or gentle stretching can help promote sleep.

• Boosting energy. Increasing your heart rate several times a week will give you more get-up-and-go. Start off with just a few minutes of exercise a day, and increase your workout as you feel more energized.

• Coping better. When faced with mental or emotional challenges in life, exercise can help you cope in a healthy way, instead of resorting to alcohol, drugs, or other negative behaviors that ultimately only make your symptoms worse. Regular exercise can also help boost your immune system and reduce the impact of stress.


Hey you YES YOU• Start by imagining a time in the future where you are the “you” that you want to be.

Consider what would be the most meaningful developments to you. (It’s important that this is the self you want to be, not one you feel pressured or like you “ought” to be.)

• Visualize your best possible self in a positive way. Imagine all the details of the situation. You can think of this as imagining a life dream, a milestone, or other big goal for yourself. For example, if your best possible self is an entrepreneur with her own successful business, imagine what that looks like. How many employees do you have? What type of boss are you? How much do you work? What do you sell or invent?

• Write down the details of this visualization. Think about what characteristics your best self is using in this imagined scenario. For example, if you are running a business, you will likely need creativity, problem-solving, networking skills, and perseverance.

• Think about what characteristics you already have. You'll probably surprise yourself! Then, think about which characteristics need further development. Imagine ways you can build those skills and traits.

• It’s very important that this not turn into an exercise in self-judgment. Don’t judge yourself for where you are now! Instead, imagine you are who you wish to be.


Time is measured by days and weeks just as well as minutes and seconds

• Taking things personally gives others power over you that they should not have.

“Personalization” is a common cognitive distortion. It happens when you interpret anything that happens to you as a direct, personal response to something about you. This can lead you to feeling that others “have it in” for you. It can also lead you to take responsibility for things you are not responsible for.

• For example, if someone cuts you off in traffic, you can choose to take it personally and stew over how rude the driver was to you. Or you can interpret it as your fault for “allowing” it to happen. These are both personalizing responses that are unhealthy. A stronger response would be to remember that you are not in control of that driver’s behavior or actions, and you don’t know why s/he did what s/he did. Maybe the driver is having a bad day. Maybe they don’t care about others’ feelings. You did not cause this behavior.

• Not taking things personally doesn’t mean you can’t feel hurt by what others say. However, refusing to take something personally will help you distance yourself from the immediate negative reaction.


You are UNIQUE in life forever• When something bad happens, remind yourself that you have the ability to overcome

this obstacle, whatever it may be. Remind yourself that even the difficulties you have gone through are learning experiences. You can draw strength and courage from knowing that you have made it through tough times, and you can do it again.

• Make a list of things you like about yourself. These could be skills, personal strengths, achievements...anything. Don't minimize your abilities and good qualities. If you're having trouble thinking of things, ask a friend to help you. They probably see many wonderful things about you that you might not even be aware of.[

• Set yourself a (reasonable) challenge to accomplish. For example, you could learn to cook a meal for your friends, or learn a few new poses in yoga, or learn to take artsy photographs. If you love to exercise, train for a 5k or 10k. Once you have accomplished this goal, celebrate it! Honor your successes, no matter how small they may seem to you.

• Don't compare yourself to others. This is a surefire way to damage anyone's self-confidence. Only you are the unique person who is you. The only person whose approval you need to seek is yours. Set goals that matter to you, and don't worry if they're not the same as everyone else's.


Are your risks bigger than they are• “Intolerance of uncertainty” plays a large role in anxiety. When you have a low tolerance for uncertainty,

you find it difficult to accept that it is not impossible for something negative to happen. You may ask “What if” questions or overestimate the risks and consequences of a negative situation or event. You may find yourself consumed with worry.

• Keep a journal throughout the day of times when you feel uncertain or anxious. Write down, as specifically as possible, what triggered these feelings. How did you respond to them?

• Rank your uncertainties. Try to place things that make you feel uncomfortable or anxious on a scale from 0-10. For example, “going shopping without a list” might rank as a 2, but “delegating a project to someone else at work” might be an 8 or 9.

• Practice tolerating uncertainty. Start safe and small. Learn to manage your fear of uncertainty by exposing yourself to it in safe, manageable situations. For example, if you only ever go to one restaurant because you’re worried you wouldn’t like the food somewhere else, try to pick a new place and eat something you have never tried before. You may or may not enjoy the food. However, you will have shown yourself that you can handle uncertainty and come out okay on the other side. Work up to bigger uncertainties gradually.

• Record your responses. When you try out something uncertain, record what happened when you did this. What did you do? How did you feel while you were doing it? How did it turn out? If things didn’t go as planned (and this will happen), how did you respond? Were you able to handle the unexpected outcome?

mental strength not mental breakdown

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