Mentoring Matters

June 2015 Volume 6 | Issue 5

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We recently ta lked about the top ten bestpractices for mentors . But what about thementees? Don't worry, we have you covered!Read more.

Here are more results from our annual MentoringMatters Reader Survey. In this month's issue, our focusis on best mentoring practices and getting started.

Best Practices for Meetings Making mentoring meetings efficient, engaging andproductive can be challenging. Here is what ourreaders had to say, in their own words, about theirbest meeting practices:

Make mentoring meetings a priority; once yougive mentoring time away, it is hard to reclaim.Be present when you are present. Don't allowdistractions and interruptions to take you offcourse.Meet frequently in the beginning and then asneeded, so that it does not become a chore toboth parties.Hold regular monthly meetings. If it's any lessthan that, the relationship feels forced anddisconnected.Use your mentoring time well.Hold monthly meetings to review your processand engage mentees in the process of thinkingabout their future.Making time, prior to your scheduled meeting,[helps me] clear my mind so I can focus on mymentee and align my thoughts with the plan forthe upcoming meeting. Take time after meetings to jot down some notesneeded for the next time; when I take those prepminutes, I know I wil l be ready.Meeting in a neutral location enables me togive them my undivided attention, andsometimes changing the location of where wemeet helps us approach things from a differentperspective."Consider the timing of the meeting.

I am going to weigh in on the lastitem: timing of the meeting. Ibelieve you need to think about

The First 90 Days of aMentoring Relationship

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June 16th, 2015 12:00 PM EDT

Dr. Lois Zachary

when and when not to meet.

When to meet? Everyone has timeduring the day when they aremore productive than others. Forsome folks it is early morning,before the workday begins.Others prefer to meet over a mealor after work hours. Talking aboutwhen you prefer to meet ratherthan where you can fit in meetingtime is a sound approach to usefor scheduling mentoringmeetings.

When not? Build flexibility intoyour scheduling process.Recognize that there may be timeswhen you are too busy to meetbecause you can't focus onanything but the project sitting onyour desk. Acknowledge that youwant to be present for yourmentee and rescheduleimmediately.

Lory Fischler

It is easy to let mentoring time toslip away. Mentors and menteescan get caught in catch-upconversation and discussionabout current projects. An hour(the average mentor-menteemeeting time) passes by fairlyquickly.

One solution is to use an agendato carve out space to limit thetime you spend on catching upand discussing projects. Whilementoring meetings shouldinclude a relationship buildingconversation and catching up oncurrent issues, they should focuson goals.

Is there sufficient time for thementee to review work on goalsand discuss what he or she islearning in the process? If youhave given your mentee anassignment or a reflectivequestion to consider, make sureyou build in adequate time for arich discussion. If you take time atthe front end for reflection and toplan for your meeting, yourmentoring meetings will flowbetter and be more productive.

Best Practices for Getting Started There is an old saying that says, "The best way to get

I thought I was pretty good at strategic visionand planning..... why was I not assigned to the

"big" project?

Click here to hear more of a sound cl ip fromLois and Lory's book Starting Strong.

A Note to Our Readers: We believe that leaders cannot be effective withouta strong and ongoing commitment to mentoringexcellence. This belief, our passion for mentoringexcellence, and our extensive experience in the fieldwith organizations led us to create the Center forMentoring Excellence. At our virtual center,www.centerformentoringexcellence.com, you willfind mentoring tools and resources, expert adviceand a forum for sharing best mentoring practices.We hope that you will visit us there and let us knowhow we can continue to help you raise the bar onmentoring in your organization.

started is to begin." It is a simple saying with a lot ofwisdom behind it. So how do you begin? Here are someof strategies that our readers are using:

Really getting to know my mentee,professionally and personally, before I try to bea helpful resource.Establish a trusting relationship FIRST.Guide and help my mentee identify what theirneeds are.Be available and allow the mentee to drive therelationship.Remembering that it's not about me, but it'sabout them.Tell my own story sparingly, only when it'sneeded to help show perspective.Allow my mentees time and space to think andnot jump in to conversation too quicklyEstablish expectations/agreementsSet the right foundation early in therelationship.

Dr. Lois Zachary

Taking time to get to know oneanother can mean different thingsto different people. In our recentbook, Starting Strong, weincluded a list of questions to useto jump start your mentoringrelationship. You might want toreview these and then add yourown to the list. Coming preparedwith a list of questions to get toknow your mentee will hasten thetrust building process and engageyou in the process of getting toknow your mentoring partner in adeeper way.

Lory Fischler

Many mentors have a prior workrelationship with their menteesand make the assumption theyknow them. They bypass theprocess of building a freshmentoring relationship andestablishing trust. Even when youwork together and feelcomfortable with each other, werecommend you take time in yourfirst conversations to learn moreabout your mentee's career path,personal history, perceptionsabout strengths and weaknesses,and career goals. Share some ofyour own personal history,especially as it relates to whatyou've learned about yourmentee. Establish points ofcommonality and interest. Slowing down and taking time toget to feel comfortable togethersaves time later. It will be easier

for your mentees to be open andreal with you, and share theirchallenges and struggles; thoseare the issues that really matter.