mid atlantic community fall 2012 consultative gatherings … › pdf › cgc slides.pdf ·...

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Mid‐Atlantic Community Fall 2012 Consultative Gatherings Abbreviated Script and Power Point

The Leadership Team presented the topics at the Fall Consultative Gatherings. The following text is presented in the same manner as if we were presenting to you at the meeting with a few minor edits. We look forward to engaging with you in conversation on our Consultative Gathering Conference Calls (11/20 and 11/26) after you have reviewed this material.

Introduction and Overview As we gather today, we do so aware that more than just a few of our sisters, associates and colleagues have been affected by Hurricane Sandy. Some have experienced loss of electric power, and others have experienced damage to their homes and ministry sites. Our hearts go out to all of them and to others we do not know but who have lost so much. All of us grieve the losses experienced by so many throughout the Mid‐Atlantic. There are two main parts to the agenda which address two of our Community planning themes:

• Mission and Ministry into the Future ( which included a brief presentation given by 2 members of the Sponsor Council) and

• Well‐‐being and Wholistic Life Development (In addition the Leadership Team also gave a presentation on legal and financial matters. Due to the sensitivity of this material, it is not included in this script but it will be addressed during the conference calls.)

Mid-Atlantic Planning Themes

• Stewardship

• Vibrant Community Life

• Mission and Ministry for the Future

• Wellbeing and Wholistic Life Development

Since September, 2011, the Leadership Team has been involved in a planning process to shape the work of our term. Last spring, at the Consultative Gatherings, you provided invaluable ideas and insight around our five planning themes. After the Gatherings, we revised our Planning Document on the basis of your input. Today we now move forward the work on two of those planning themes – but before we do, we would like to share with you some thoughts that emerged for the team related to our planning at the recent Institute Leadership Conference (ILC) meeting in Belmont, North Carolina.

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Mid-Atlantic Community |

Institute Leadership Conference

Perspectives Document

A Story of Realities,

Choices, and Visions

Leadership

Perspectives

on a Sustainable

Future for Mercy

The Institute of the Sisters of Mercy of the Americas

The Leadership Team has recently returned from our Fall Institute Leadership Conference, the gathering of all the Teams of the Institute, better known as the ILC. The ILC is continuing to work on and be guided by our Leadership Perspectives on a Sustainable Future for Mercy document which was shared with you and discussed in our Conversation Circles this past spring. At this recent ILC meeting, the Institute Leadership Team drew out six main themes which emerged from both this Perspectives Document and the 5th Institute Chapter using the wording of the Chapter Declaration. After some sharing and discussion, each of the leadership teams in the Institute committed to focus its work over the next five years on these six themes.

• Passion for Service

• Vibrant Community Life

• Critical Concerns

• Liberating and Redistributing Human and Financial Resources

• Sustaining the Mercy Charism

• Governance

Last Spring at our Consultative Gatherings, we presented our Mid-Atlantic Community planning themes to you. Because those themes flowed from the Chapter Declaration and the Perspectives Document, they are very much in sync with the six themes listed by the Institute Leadership Team. They are really one and the same, although we might name some of the components differently. Therefore, to better reflect and stress the connection to the Institute themes we would like to adjust the names of some of our Planning Themes.


Institute/Mid-Atlantic Planning Themes

1. Passion for Service

Mission/Ministry into the Future

2. Vibrant Community Life

Vibrant Community Life

Wellbeing /Wholistic Life Development

3. Critical Concerns

Prophetic Voice

4. Liberating/Redistributing Human/Financial Resources

Stewardship

5. Sustaining the Mercy Charism

Embrace the present and emerging future of prophetic religious life, and support new forms of Mercy Life.

6. Governance Governance

This slide shows both the Institute Themes (red) and our Mid-Atlantic themes (blue). For future planning we will be renaming our Mid-Atlantic themes according to the Institute wording. The Institute theme of Passion for Service, is what we called Mission and Ministry into the Future.

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Our theme of Vibrant Community Life will remain the same and we will incorporate our theme of Wellbeing and Wholistic Life Development under this heading. CRITICAL CONCERNS we named as Prophetic Voice. LIBERATING & REDISTRIBUTING HUMAN & FINANCIAL RESOURCES we simply named as Stewardship. In our Mid‐Atlantic Community Planning Document we named this theme of Sustaining the Mercy Charism as two objectives under Vibrant Community Life:

• Embrace the present and emerging future of prophetic religious life and

• Support new forms of Mercy life

Now we will be incorporating those two objectives under the new theme: Sustaining the Mercy Charism. And finally, our theme of Governance will remain the same. The desire is that by using the same terminology for its work, each Community will recognize that it is part of a greater whole.


Institute Member Engagement

6 Mid-Atlantic Community |

2012-13Relationship with Hierarchical Church

2013-14Vibrant Community Life

2014-15New Membership

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Institute Member Engagement

In addition, we want to draw your attention to an announcement that recently appeared in the Institute e‐newsletter Mercy Now. This announcement was about the engagement of membership on some of the topics in the Leadership Perspectives Document. In Mercy Now you were introduced to a three‐year Institute‐wide reflection process titled “Women of Mercy, Women of Hope”. We will be engaging in three contemplative conversations around sustaining the Mercy Charism. The themes are:

2012‐2013 Our Membership in and relationship to the Church –Hopefully you have already marked your calendars for the Theological presentation on Ecclesiology to be held at Merion on January 5 and in Watchung on January 6th.

2013‐2014 Vibrant Community Life 2014‐2015 New Membership

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Now for the main presentation of the morning: Community Planning Theme of Passion for Service


Ministry Priority

The Mid-Atlantic Community affirmsas a Ministry Priority for the next fiveyears, a focus on the economicallypoor, particularly women and children.

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We recall that at our second Mid‐Atlantic Community Assembly held in April, 2011, we developed both a Vision Statement of our common mission as well as our Ministry Priority, which affirms a focus on those who are economically poor, especially women and children. Since September 2007, Margaret Taylor, RSM, our Director of Sponsorship, has been working with the Mid‐Atlantic Community Leadership Team to put structures in place that will assist in the oversight of our sponsored works. One of these structures is the Sponsor Council, which plays a key role in determining how our sponsored ministries are applying the Criteria and Vision for Ministry. Our hope is that by the end of this presentation, you will have a much clearer idea of the purpose of, and ways in which, the Sponsor Council functions.


Passion for Service

Objective 1

- to ensure that mission and a sense of call are integral in all aspects of the Mid-Atlantic Community.

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One of our goals for this presentation is to update you on the theme of Passion for Service which we had been calling Mission and Ministry. After our Spring Consultative Gatherings the team listed objectives and action steps based on your input. In response to one of the concerns you raised, we have named as the first objective: “to ensure that mission and a sense of call are integral in all aspects of the Mid‐Atlantic Community”. We have made quite a bit of progress on our first objective, which we’d like to share with you today. Our continued collaboration with the laity shows the importance of education on the Mercy charism and the importance of a strong sponsorship relationship. Since September, two more of our sponsored works are being led by our lay colleagues.

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Our Lady of Mercy Academy in Syosset, New York, instituted a new administrative structure – moving from co‐principals to a President‐Principal model.


Passion for Service

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Margaret MyhanPresident

Joan GordonPrincipal

Our Lady of Mercy, Syosset


Passion for Service

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Nell Stetser

Waldron Mercy Academy Principal

The new president of Our Lady of Mercy Academy in Syosset is Margaret Myhan, a graduate and former board member of the Academy. And Joan Gordon is serving as the new principal. Joan has served for many years as co‐principal with Sister Helen Lyons, RSM. And the newly appointed principal of Waldron‐Mercy Academy in Merion, PA, is Nell Stetser, a graduate of Merion Mercy Academy and a Mercy Associate. Clearly, all of these women are deeply rooted in Mercy. For both schools, an inspirational public ritual led by Sister Pat Vetrano marked the transfer of leadership and the entrusting of our sacred treasures to someone other than a Sister of Mercy for the first time in their respective histories.

Continuing our support of our lay collaborators, the Office of Mission developed a ministry formation program for those who are newly involved in the governance of our Mid‐Atlantic sponsored ministries. On the weekend of September 28‐29, 2012, our Office of Mission sponsored its first weekend of ministry formation focused on the charism of Mercy, the inspiration of Catherine McAuley and the Mid‐Atlantic sponsorship and governance structures. Attending were new Sponsor Council members, new board members and new administrators, Sister Eleace King, IHM the new administrator of McGlynn Learning Center and two new lay administrators at two of our retirement facilities: Roxann Bambach at McAuley Convent and Joe Sharp at McAuley Hall.


Passion for Service

Action:

–Continue to develop ways to keep all sisters connected to ministry.

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Our Director of Ministry, Sister Sheila Tynan, has been working on this action to respond to the request that all of our sisters feel connected to our ministries. On Mercy Day, 2012, sisters in our retirement facilities in several geographical areas participated in a prayer service that connected them to a ministry as prayer partners. The ministries have been asked to find ways to keep the sisters connected to their ministry throughout the year. Sisters in the remaining groups will be scheduling their prayer services in January. This program provides a wonderful link of our ministries with our sisters who desire to learn all that is happening and offer their support in many ways.

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Passion for Service

Action:

–Develop appropriate governance structures for our un-incorporated ministries

–Evaluate and re-structure the Office of Mission

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Sheila has also been working with Leadership to research the best governance structure for our un‐incorporated ministries, especially in the Dallas area. She will continue these conversations with ministries, leadership, and legal counsel over the next few weeks to help facilitate this endeavor. As the Mid‐Atlantic Community was formed, decisions were made and structures were developed that would meet the needs at that time, particularly in the areas of sponsorship and ministry. At that time, the Life and Ministry Facilitators were asked to engage in a sister’s discernment and decision around making a change in her ministry. A second step was to meet with the Director of Ministry, Sheila Tynan, whose role it was to offer guidance and additional assistance in seeking new ministerial positions or transitioning from full‐time ministry to part‐time or volunteer service.


Passion for Service

Present Reality in Ministries

–Fewer sisters in full-time ministry

–Fewer opportunities in Church ministry

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As we have lived through these years, clearly the number of persons changing ministries is fewer; and opportunities for Church ministries have lessened due to the changes in parish and Diocesan structures and resources.


Passion for Service

Present Reality in Sponsored Ministries:

–Increase in lay administration

–Need for Board education

–Legal complexities

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At the same time, we are experiencing challenging shifts within our sponsored ministries, movement to lay administrators, a greater need for Board development and Governance education, as well as assisting people in dealing with the complexities of government regulations and legal realities. Oversight of those ministries that bear our name for

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which we hold Mission, legal and financial responsibility, has put greater demands on both the Director of Sponsorship and the members of the Sponsor Council. In considering these realities, we have been working with both Sheila and Margaret during the past year to determine the necessary changes to assure that our priorities of Mission and Ministry continue to be addressed as well as providing support for our sisters in relation to ministry. We have also spoken with the Life and Ministry Facilitators, who have already been engaged with sisters making changes in ministry. We will continue to work with them to develop more specific steps in that process. Given these shifts, the position of Director of Ministry will end at the close of this calendar year. We are most grateful to Sheila for the work she has done in developing relationships with our sisters across the Mid‐Atlantic Community and, in particular, with those ministries that were not separately incorporated.


Passion for Service

Associate Director of Sponsorship:

–Learn structures and operations of all sponsored ministries

–Succeed Director of Sponsorship

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In the Mid‐Atlantic Messages (May 31st to be exact), a position was posted for an Associate Director of Sponsorship. This new position will assist in meeting the Community’s current needs, prepare and strengthen the mission into the future and provide for succession planning for the Director’ of Sponsorship s role. Our hope is that this person will be in place by January, 2013.


Passion for ServiceAction:

–Appoint a Mission Implementation Committee:

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The next Action is to appoint a Mission Implementation Committee. You will recall that this committee was recently formed. This Committee will assist the Community with our application of our Assembly Vision and Priority for Mission. The Committee’s work is distinct from the Sponsor Council. The Committee is the group that will engage us as a Community, while the Sponsor Council engages with the Mercy sponsored ministries in our Community Priorities. The Committee has begun to meet in the past two months, and they will be assisting us with a process at our March Consultative Gathering.

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We are very grateful to the members of this Committee for their willingness to serve the Community in this capacity. The members of the committee are:

Mary Ann Basile Cecilia Fox Madeline Cipriano Rose Martin Kati McMahon Ann O’Connell Marie Parker Mayon Sylvain Sheila Tynan Chairs: Rosemary Herron & Regina Ward


Passion for Service

Objective 2: - to continue the process of

establishing focus, priorities, vision and sustainability for the ministries of the Mid-Atlantic Community

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The second objective of this planning theme is to continue the process of establishing focus, priorities, vision, and sustainability for the ministries of the Mid‐Atlantic Community. Essential to this objective is our Sponsor Council to which the Mid‐Atlantic Community Leadership Team has delegated many of its oversight responsibilities.


Criteria for Ministry• Enflesh the Gospel and the Mercy charism

• Give evidence of viability /sustainability in its service

• Model social and ecological justice

• Maintain professional standards of excellence

• Has tangible, defined relationships with the Sisters of Mercy, their Associates and Collaborators

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Members of the Sponsor Council are assigned to each of our sponsored works. They visit their assigned sponsored work at least annually and more often as needed. Sponsor Council Members then report back to the full Sponsor Council on how the sponsored works are fulfilling the Criteria for Ministry established at our Mid‐Atlantic Assembly and shown on this slide. The current members of the Sponsor Council are: Kimberly Baxter Donna Beal Mary Jeanne Broderick Carol Chiodo Brian Elderton Beth Flannery, RSM Martha Hanlon, RSM Virginia Hasson, RSM Janet Henry, RSM Anne Kappler, RSM Mary Jane Krebbs Eileen McDonnell, RSM Ann O’Connell, RSM Geraldine O’Hare Terrence Moran, C.Ss.R. Marie Parker, RSM Evelyn Saul Quinn Betty Scanlon, RSM Steve Stritch Robert D. Williams Kathleen Keenan, RSM Pat Smith, RSM

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Rather than talk more about the Sponsor Council, several members of the Sponsor Council (Marie Chiodo, Virginia Hasson, RSM, Mary Jeanne Broderick and Marie Parker, RSM) were present to give brief presentations on their role and experience on the Council. The next slide is a photo and the presentation of Carol Chiodo, who presently serves on the Sponsor Council and is one of two liaisons to Mercy Vocational High School in Philadelphia.

Mid-Atlantic Community | 25

Sponsor Council

Carol Chiodo

My name is Carol Chiodo. By way of brief background, my roots in the Mercy community go back to my early childhood. I attended Gwynedd Mercy Academy from K through 12, graduating in 1975. Our son attended GMA Elementary from K through 8. At present, I run a small business in the specialty contracting and commercial real estate field.

I have worked with faith-based (Catholic) organizations through governance work for about 25 years, serving on the boards of Project Rainbow, a transitional housing facility for homeless women and children in North Philadelphia, Gwynedd Mercy High School, and our parish Pastoral Council. I am currently on the board at Mercy Vocational High School. I am an inaugural member of the Mercy Sponsor Council.

Neither my talent, nor my training, is in education or social services. However, I strongly feel the call to assist with this type of work. I have found these organizations are much stronger – and much more successful - when they have active, engaged individuals as part of their governance bodies. The board’s assistance is partly in oversight, partly in planning, and partly in advocacy. It is in those qualities, as well as my passion for the mission, that I think I may bring something to the table. While I cannot speak for everyone, I think that sentiment is common to the members of the Sponsor Council. And so, I can be very succinct and direct about why I serve on the Mercy Sponsor Council. I hope to help ensure the long term sustainability of the ministries of the Sisters of Mercy through strong governance thereby allowing sisters to minister directly to those in need.

My experience so far on the Sponsor Council has been excellent. I am awed with the practical manner in which you sisters view the future of your ministries, the future of the community, and the future role of the laity. The Leadership Team has been methodical, organized and pro-active in making plans that will ensure continuity for those served. The Sponsor Council is a group of people where every voice is valued and the voice of the Sponsor Council is in turn valued by the Leadership Team.

The Sponsor Council meets one time per month via teleconference. We meet face-to-face two times per year. Our agenda items run from voting on new Board members, new heads of ministries, changes to by-laws, to much weightier matters such as deficit budgets and possible closings of ministries. We have divided our-selves two ways: first, we have paired off in twos as “liaisons” to each of our 19 ministries. Liaisons attend the annual meeting of their ministry and make an in-depth annual visit to the head administrator and Board Chair. Liaisons are responsible to speak for their assigned ministries in any matters related to the ministry that arise during the Sponsor Council meetings.

Second, we divided ourselves into five committees: Sustainability, Relationship, Governance, SC Development, and Executive. While a far more eloquent and formal Mission Statement is available, in brief, our charge is to be the eyes and ears for the Leadership Team. Our authority has a deliberately limited scope, but we do believe that our insights and observations are heard by the Leadership Team and provide strong guidance in their ultimate decisions. It is this opportunity to have a voice, a seat at the table that continues to fuel our passion for the future of Catholic education and social services. It is a great privilege to be able to assist the Sisters of Mercy and their ministries.

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Leadership Update:Mid-Atlantic Community

- Financial Information

- Legal Updates

At this time, Pat Vetrano and Kathleen Keenan provided a few financial and legal updates. These will be presented on the conference calls. We recognize that this information on the next two slides is hard to read, but we will explain these slides on the conference call.


Institute Assets

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Data as of 6/30/11


Ministry Support

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$400,000 $466,000

MinistrySupportMember

Support

Now to the main presentation of the afternoon: Community Planning Theme of Wellbeing and Wholistic Life Development

Mid-Atlantic Planning Themes

VIBRANT COMMUNITY LIFE

Wellbeing and Wholistic Life Development

In preparation for this discussion, you received several documents via our Mid‐Atlantic Messages. One document was a series of quotes on Ongoing Life Development, which will be addressed indirectly during this first half of this presentation. It really was mainly food for thought to get you thinking in this direction.

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A second document was a Guideline for Aging in Place/Community. This Guideline will be addressed in the second half of this presentation. In addition, you also received a copy of our Mid‐Atlantic Philosophy of Retirement and the Mid‐Atlantic Vision for Health and Wellness.


Vibrant Community LifeWellbeing and Wholistic

Life Development

Objectives:

- Ongoing spiritual/intellectual/emotional development

- Planning for the needs of seniorsisters

First, to remind you, this Community planning theme, as presented to you at our Spring 2012 Consultative Gatherings,

consisted of two objectives. The first objective addresses the need for ongoing spiritual, intellectual, and emotional

formation/ development in all stages of life and the second objective addresses the more immediate planning for the

needs of our senior sisters.

At our Spring Consultative Gatherings, you affirmed this theme with its two objectives and in small groups at your tables you listed many wonderful insights and suggestions on the newsprint provided around the room. For our purposes today we would like to share with you some of the input you gave us around the first objective in this planning theme: To address the ongoing spiritual, intellectual, emotional, and physical formation/development for members in all stages of life


The slide above is called a WORDLE. The way it works is, you submit the words of a document into a computer program and it comes back in this form enlarging the words that are repeated most often. In this case you’ll see that words like: resources, supports, emotional, intellectual, physical, lifelong, development, and programs are larger because these were words that were repeated and stressed at each of the four Spring Consultations

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There were many wonderful practical suggestions for how this particular theme might be implemented they included things like:

Develop a Life Planning Process

Reinstate M.I.L.D. for coordination of wellbeing and wholistic life development

Create a plan to involve sisters in a process for continuation in ministry using their life skills and

Develop a process for sisters, as they age, to discern new directions for life and ministry according to their needs and capabilities.

While these suggestions were helpful, the leadership team feels that before we can begin to develop concrete ways to address this planning theme, we need more discussion as a Community to help us gain greater clarity before moving forward with this theme. Our hope for these Consultative Gatherings is to engage in reflection and conversation that will help us begin to come to a common understanding of this issue. Perhaps our discussion here this afternoon will also raise our consciousness on our personal need to be more attentive to our own life development process. We paused at this point in the presentation and asked everyone to reflect on a sister you know (either living or deceased) who exemplifies someone who lives her life in a wholistic manner and included time for sharing. We invite you to pause here and do the same.

Next we shared two presentations; one on the psychology of life development and one on the theology/spirituality of life development. These presentations were prepared and given by Judith Smith, Mary Anne Nolan and Kathleen McAlpin Judith has been a Sister of Mercy for 38 years. She has ministered as a clinical psychology nurse for twelve years; and for the past nine years she has ministered to women and men religious and clergy at the Southdown Institute, Saint John Vianney Center and St. Luke Institute. Many of you have already had the pleasure of meeting Mary Anne in various settings but most recently in the workshops she’s been offering in the Mid‐Atlantic Community titled: Next Steps on the Journey. Kathleen has been serving as the director of novices at the Institute Novitiate in Laredo, Texas. Prior to that, Kathleen was the director of the integration for Ministry and Spiritual Direction Formation Programs at Regis College in Toronto. As we begin, it’s important for you to know that we will be reflecting on this topic of life development in a process that is both wholistic and contextual.

Wholistic and context have many meanings. However, today by wholistic life development we mean the integration of ‘body, mind and spirit’ as we develop humanly and spiritually throughout religious life. By the context of life development we mean all the situations in which we experience life in relationship with God, self, others and the world. Some examples of these situations are: prayer, community life, ministry, society/country, nature, church, politics … To help us understand Ongoing Life Development as both wholistic and contextual in a few minutes you will hear presentations from psychological, theological and spiritual resources. Although we will present these as separate topics for deeper understanding, we know they are integrated in the experience of ongoing life development.

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*** At this point, either click on the video of the presentation on a Psychology of Life Development or read the

attached presentation below.

A Psychology of On‐going Life Development (Judith Smith, RSM)

Let me start by telling you about a commercial I saw on television last week. (Editor’s Note: If you really want to treat yourself, go onto this website http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PR_UYx4vSPs to view it for yourself.) The video starts with one little child laughing hysterically, then more children laughing, then we see individual shots of adolescents laughing, then younger adults laughing, then older adults laughing; all hysterically, and finally, there is very old man laughing, hysterically. Now everybody knows how contagious laughter can be. ‐‐ As if that was not a pearl in itself these words came across the screen. “It’s not the miles that count; it’s how you live them.” What an exquisite phrase for thinking about our own life development!!! In her introduction, Honora has already underscored that many great ideas and recommendations came forth from the Spring Consultations when we addressed the theme, among other themes, of well‐being and wholistic life. So today, I’ll share a couple ideas from studies of adult life development, that may be relevant to us here in the Mid‐Atlantic Community. Those who study life development tell us that because of the changes in life expectancy, we now have more life stages than were observed in the earlier half of the twentieth century. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, in 1900 the life expectancy was about age 47; today it is mid‐80’s. (And, keep in mind we are talking about the culture in the US.) This fact alone has changed the way we look at adult development dramatically. Of course, there are many other factors, like the advances in medical care, the economic realities, technology, and various cultural influences that go along with living longer. Studies in human development now consider adult developmental stages to look something like this:

age 20‐30 or later is now considered the period of emerging adulthood; age 30‐45 is now considered early adulthood; age 45‐60 is considered adulthood I; age 60‐75 adulthood II; and seniority occurs from age 75‐85 or beyond, old age is now thought to be a brief period (perhaps a year or two) at the very end of life.

According to this model most of us in the Mid‐Atlantic are in adulthood one and two, or what some call, (and I like this better), the “third chapter”; that time of life from approximately age 50 to 75 or beyond. In the last century, developmentalists focused on observing and understanding adolescence; today much research and observation is focusing on all ages of adult development, but especially the areas of this “third chapter”. So, what might be important for us to take away from this knowledge? I believe this schema can help us understand our experience as it relates to who we are, and the culture around us, and to, perhaps influence our own thinking about aging. We know well that religious life is experiencing a decline in numbers and a rise in age. We have been talking about this for many years and have had to consider the impact of this from many perspectives including the psychological implications. Many of us grew up thinking what popular culture told us, it’s all downhill after 50.

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Well, just look around you, is this our experience? I hope you are all saying “absolutely not.” Most of us do not feel like life is downhill after 50. Most of the community does not appear to be moving downhill after they become 50, in fact the opposite seems true. Think of our own Catherine McAuley who founded the Sisters of Mercy at the age of 53. So clearly, that cultural expectation doesn’t fit the experience we have of our sisters who are over age 50. Retirement is another area that carries a lot of cultural expectations. That we live longer means we have more productive years. Therefore, today most people do not retire at 65 or even 70 and beyond. The new stages, of which I spoke, inserted into our developmental schemas, bring with them the recognition of the numerous gifts of these stages of life. Think of our many sisters who in 1980s changed direction from successful years of ministry as teachers, to serve the economically poor, or those who espoused ministries in spirituality in their second careers as they recognized the need for this among the people of God. Sister Sandra Schneiders, a Sister of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, a leading authority on Catholic women's religious life, and (who herself is enjoying the “Third chapter” of her life), wrote of this time period, “According to those who study development this penultimate stage of human life is perhaps the richest and potentially most productive period of the human life cycle.,” Are we not a living illustration of this? I’d like to share about the work of two women both social anthropologist and educators, who undertook research about this new stage of life. They, independent of each other, gathered the stories of the lives of women and men between ages 50 and 75. Essentially, what they found were individuals who were defying the cultural attitudes about aging ‐ individuals who were finding new ways to adapt, explore, and challenge their energies, skills, and passions. One author, Mary Catherine Bateson, referred to this time of life as the “age of active wisdom”. She says it is “characterized by the accumulated experience of adulthood but endowed with health and energy, so that wisdom is combined with activity and often with an activism for the common good.” She later writes of this wisdom as “a quality of listening, that is both internal and interpersonal, …a willingness to learn and to modify earlier learning …and a process more than a possession”. And finally, she defines this wisdom as “the ability and willingness to contribute to society by putting a lifetime pattern of experience and reflection to work, often, above all, by listening.” The second author, Sara Lawrence Lightfoot wrote a book titled The Third Chapter: Passion, Risk and Adventure in the 25 Years after 50. She says “the third chapter – those years when we’re neither old not young – can be the most transformative time in our lives, just as long as we have the courage to challenge the ageist stereotypes, the creativity to resist the old cultural norms, the curiosity to be open to new learning, and the adventurousness to pursue new passions and experiences”. The qualities put forth in both of these works can speak to us about what helps us stay vibrant and well in our ongoing life development. –What they found were qualities of openness, resilience, interiority, commitment, engagement with all generations, willingness to learn new things, willingness to take risks, and redefining their selves, finding new purpose, all of these coupled with strong desires to make a contribution to society. The folks interviewed for this research wanted meaning, they wanted community, they wanted new forms of interaction with others, they wanted to be valued and appreciated for who they were not so much for what they did, but they didn’t want to stop there, they also wanted to give forward. To accomplish this they were willing to step out of their usual patterns and embrace, for some, radically new ways of being. They wanted their third chapter to be more reflective of who they were from the inside out. Essentially, these folks found ways to combine what they were learning from their own depths with ways of giving forward. Might this sound like the sister you’ve just reflected on! These authors didn’t know it but they were talking about us. We, in effect, are and have been architects of this third chapter ‐ if only they had known religious sisters! Maybe we would have made it into their writings. But in reality ‐ we are writing our own book! Think of it, embracing new ways? ‐ Recall for a moment, in 2007, we became the Mid‐Atlantic Community, a new way of being!

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Redefining ourselves and our sense of purpose? – think of all of years of re‐imagining and re‐configuring! New ways of interacting? Think of our Conversations Circles, these Consultation days, our 2007 Convocation, when we all came together on a college campus three years ago. We,too, are writing the book on the third chapter. We, as religious women, the majority of us in this third chapter, are engaged in life and ministry with vitality and always searching for ways to live our lives more intentionally and to share what we can of ‐ the Incarnate love of God ‐ with a world deeply in need of healing, comfort, and a sense of the spiritual. But living this way takes the attributes of intentionality, discipline, and an attention to our ever deepening spiritual core. So, what are some of our unique strengths that identify with what the theorist tell us about living positively into the future? I’ll name just a few:

1. We have our spirituality; both the personal relationships with God and our communal relationship with God. ‐ How many of us think about the fact of this as our greatest life gift? A gift our world hungers for! In the stories that I read, spirituality was the foremost hunger that each of these individual longed for.

Mary Anne Nolan will speak more about this (in her presentation) but I want to emphasize that even psychology recognizes that attitudes of faith, hope, love, and forgiveness – all received and given –are truly fundamentals for well‐being and wholistic living. Recall for a moment, the recent premature death of one of our sisters, Jackie Walsh, who was tragically killed in a hit‐and‐run accident. Look at the living spirituality when thousands came together to mourn her. Look at the impact of her spirituality on the world.

2. We have community. Whether we live alone or with others, we are connected to good and well intentioned people, who are searching and striving to be the best they can. We are cared about even in the moments when we might not recognize it. We can receive help with almost anything we need.

‐ Look at the community that exists in this room today at our Consultative Gathering, women who’s courage and vitality goes unannounced every day.

3. We have intergenerational living.

‐ Which gives us multiple opportunities to be with the old, the in‐between, the younger among us, to learn from each other and to share the wisdom of our particular experience and age. Think of it, we have multiple opportunities to learn from the wiser among us, those who have in effect, been there and done it. Do we recognize this not only as a resource for fuller living, but as a real gift?

4. We are educated…

‐ Many of our sisters have advanced degrees. We have among us experts in theology, housing, hospital administration, ecology, and education, just to name a few.

5. Above all, we have Trust ‐ first in God, ourselves and in those around us I’ve named just a few of the life structures that can support our own development. What ones do you come up with? Continuing to think creatively about our unique strengths and building on them is one of our own ongoing tasks.

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So let’s just skim the surface of some attitudes we can continue to cultivate (some already mentioned and most known by all of you), that can help us maintain or gain positive well‐being as we attend to our own ongoing development.

1) The first is openness: ‐ to ourselves, others, and new ideas. We all have had a lot of practice in this. In terms of ourselves ‐ Sometimes we need to look at ourselves and even radically so. A key here is gentleness. We all have strengths and vulnerabilities in mind, body, and spirit. Are we willing to accept our own human condition? In terms of others ‐ Are we aware of our expectations and can we be gentle with each other as we all encounter our common human condition? In terms of strengths ‐ Are we aware of what our personal strengths, are we grateful for these and do

we put them to good use? In terms of Can we face our darker sides, the places of our fears, our limitations?

Vulnerabilities ‐ Let me mention something that can hinders our openness: Negativity. Let’s face it we all have some of this, but negative thinking, talk, things like self‐criticism, criticizing or judging others are soul killers. Our culture has made promoted industries of cynicism and sarcasm. Think of the recent political campaign! It a good reminder to check our negativity; ‐‐‐if you find yourself feeling this way or speaking this way often, you probably are straining under too much stress or too many unmet needs. Keep in mind that Anger is a good thing; it signals that something is bothering us but it also can be a mask for other, deeper feelings. Be gentle in facing this and if you need help talk to a friend, someone you trust, or if needed get professional help.

2) A second attitude that helps our well‐being is taking a risk: of doing something different in terms of who we

want to be. And please be clear, I am not suggesting heroics. I’m suggesting taking a purposeful risk to try something new. We already had one example of our own Catherine McAuley who at the age of 53 started our community. Can we use her as a model of risk‐taking among other things? Can we find other role models for this? Perhaps this was one of the qualities you thought of in your reflection on someone who had navigated her life development wholistically?

Another example: perhaps more simple but probably not less courageous is something I recently heard, one of our own sisters, age 92 took up the offer to give a public tribute for another sister. She had never spoken to a group publically, and so of course, she was a bit anxious. However, she didn’t give into her fears, rather she bypassed her own anxiety and took the risk because she knew it would mean a great deal to someone else. And the outcome ‐‐was wonderful for her as well as others. She felt a sense of pride, joy and accomplishment in doing something completely new. Another example: I recently had a sister call me to ask if I knew of someone she could speak to for counseling, something she had never done in her life. She was in her 70s. These are examples of this kind of courage both large scale and small of doing something new. I am sure you could tell a million more of these stories. So what about you? What risks have you taken recently? Try it, do it every day and congratulate yourself afterward.

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Here let me bring in one of the hindrances, to trying something new, and that is rigidity in thinking or behaving. This can hinder our sense of positive well‐being. We all need safety, security, routine, and predictability but not as our primary mode of operation.

3) Another attitude that can help us navigate our well‐being is ‐ ongoing learning ‐ feeding your intellect and your

soul. Developmental studies confirm these as the most important aspects of maintaining well‐being and keeping our minds fresh and our hearts full. Here is a simple but significant illustration: someone I know recently told me she was studying Spanish – she is 65. Another sister I recently spoke with extolled that she was learning and practicing Centering prayer, she was 71. There are so many things to learn and know about and again we can set out every day to learn something new.

4) And another characteristic of well‐being is being connected with people, attending to our needs for intimacy,

our needs for companionship, and belonging – I don’t need to tell you: these are basic life‐long human needs, that require our attention.

5) A few other attitudes that help us :

Getting perspective, especially when we get annoyed or upset. One sister I know has as her motto: What is this to eternity? I’m not sure she was seeing this as getting perspective but it made sense to me.

Cultivating our sense of trust in God, in life, and in the people who love us. And here let me add that excessive worry can detract from positive well‐being. Some worry is adaptive, it can help us prepare for challenging situations, but too much thwarts us.

6) Practicing gratitude and appreciation

Psychologists have now done research on how keeping a gratitude journal helps people with depression. (I’ve shared with my colleagues that spiritual writers have been saying this for centuries).

7) Another key attitude is balance in self‐care and other care.

Do we tend to our needs for rest, nutritious food, exercise and time for ourselves, maybe to do nothing or something frivolous? Do we purposefully take time for ourselves or does ministry always come first? You may not always be at your place of ministry but if your mind is always there, you are at risk for burn out or you may already be in the stages of burn out which we know results in depression and anxiety, and declining health.

These are just a few of the many attitudes we can grow in and cultivate to help us navigate our way to wholistic living and well‐being. So let’s end here, where we started this little segment in our program today, remembering that one of our most cherished gifts and something we all have, and is likely unique only to human beings; that is ‐ our ability to laugh! So with this in mind, consider this: our deepest wisdom is already within us! Questions for Reflection:

How does what I heard connect in a familiar or a new way with my lived experience?

How does it call me to ongoing life development?

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Theological Presentation on Life Development (Mary Anne Nolan/Kathleen McAlpin)

To begin, let us in our imagination go back to the time before creation when only God existed. Imagine the three persons in communion with each other. Imagine the energy, dynamism, intensity of the love and life that existed among them. Imagine their deep desire to expand the love and life they had for each other, to bring others into this dynamic communion. Thus they consciously chose to create. They consciously chose to create the universe, our planet earth, human life. They consciously chose to create each of us as the unique persons that we are, out of love, to invite us into their communion of life and love. For God is Love and the very nature of love is life pouring itself forth. We, who gather here in this moment, have been consciously chosen by God with all of our gifts and limits. God has given each of us the gift of life. Consider Abraham Heschel’s quote: “Just to be is a blessing. Just to live is holy.” The gift of life, the gift of who God made each of us to be, is unique in all the world. After God made each of us, God threw away the mold. In the whole world, there is only one you, only one me. There is only one person with our talents, our experience, our gifts, and our grace. No one can take our place. God created only one of each of us and we are each precious in God’s sight. Each of us is special, miraculous, unrepeatable, fragile and tender. Each of us, at every age, the youngest to the oldest, has a tremendous capacity to love, to care, to create, to grow, to believe in ourselves and to nurture God’s life within us. But God’s gift of life, with all of its uniqueness, did not stop there for us as Sisters of Mercy. God further invited us into the life of the Christian community through Baptism. Nor was that the end of our call to life. At some point, God called each of us to live the consecrated life, a life where our primary relationship is with God and God alone. And we are even further gifted because God called us to live that consecrated life through a life of “mercy, the principal path pointed out by Jesus Christ to those who are desirous of following Him.” Consider for a moment the awesome reality of the life that is ours… As with any gift that we have been given, our first response is gratitude. There is an old song from the 70’s that I think still speaks to the response of gratitude that is ours: “Love that’s freely given wants to be freely be received. All the love you offer us can hardly be believed. And all that we can offer you is thanks. All that we can offer you is thanks.” But following on the heels of our profound gratitude is a desire to respond in love by caring for that abundant life with which we have been entrusted. You are all familiar with Catherine’s quote about prayer as a plant. I would like to use the quote but substitute “life.” Life “is a plant, the seed of which is sown in the heart of every Christian. If it is well‐cultivated and nourished, it will produce abundant fruit, but if it is neglected, it will wither and die.” If we do not nurture the gift of our life, not only are we not going to live up to the potential that God has entrusted to us but the world loses, too. As Paul says in 1 Corinthians 14, all gifts are given for the building up of the community. No one else can be who we are. No one else can give what is our self to give. The world we find ourselves in, whether wide or limited, will be the lesser for it. There is a Jewish tale that reveals both the universal tendency to want to be someone else and the ultimate importance of becoming one’s self: Rabbi Zusya, when he was an old man, said, “In the coming world, they will not ask me: ‘Why were you not Moses?’ They will ask me: “Why were you not Zusya?’” If we do not strive to be all that God made us to be, we, as well as the persons and world around us, will be the losers. Becoming all that God has created us to be at

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times can feel burdensome. And it is burdensome if we think that it is some kind of do‐it‐yourself project. But we do not do it ourselves. There is a lovely story in Acts about a woman named Lydia. Read the passage. Acts 16: 11 – 15. Lydia, a worshipper of God, listened, listened, and the Lord opened her heart to pay attention to what Paul was saying. Lydia listened. Lydia made herself available, took advantage of the opportunity to hear Paul, but God was the one who opened her heart to be changed. God’s opening Lydia’s heart puts us in the realm of grace, a theological concept and yet much more. Grace can be described as God’s self‐communication to the world through Christ in the power of the Holy Spirit. This self‐communication of God is, in fact, God’s very self, God’s whole self. Karl Rahner states that, in Christ and the Spirit, God empties God’s Self toward us and for our sakes. He insists that the entire purpose of creation is that God gives God’s Self to us in relationship. We are and all the created order exists in order that God might give God’s Self away. At every moment God is giving us God’s very self. As Michael Downey says, “God’s life‐giving love is directed toward us, for us, with us and in us,” at every moment. God has no other concern but simply being there for each of us alone, gracing us with his presence, keeping us company, companioning us. God says at every moment to each of us, “I am yours. I am for you, with you and in you.” With God being so close, so intimately involved in our lives, so ready to offer us what we need in order to nurture both our human and divine life, growing into our full potential is a partnership and a joint venture with God. Nothing happens to us in life that cannot be a means of grace, that cannot deepen our life within and open us to our God’s coming ever closer. Lydia listened in the context of her life and God opened her heart. We listen in the context of our lives: in our prayer, in our community life, in our relationships, in our ministry, in our aging process and God opens our heart to receive all that God desires to give us. Not only will we become and grow every day of our life but the world in which we live, whether large or limited, will profit from our fidelity. And we will be able to say with Paul, “I am who I am and God’s grace in me has not been ineffective.” 1Cor 15:10. Question for Reflection:

How is God communicating with me in a way that is inviting or challenging me to ongoing life development?

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Presentation on Aging in Place/Community (This Guideline was sent with the preparatory material for the Consultative Gatherings.)

As was stated earlier, the second objective under the planning theme of Wellbeing and Wholistic Life Development addresses the need for more immediate planning for our needs as we age. This is the purpose of the guidelines we are reviewing with you today. Andy Rooney, the late commentator from 60 Minutes, once said, “It's paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to anyone.” For sure, there is a reluctance in our American culture to speak of aging. Aging is something to be avoided at all costs! While we’ve heard people say many times, “Aging is not for the faint of heart!” and that may be true, how blessed are we that we do not have to worry about aging alone, how blessed are we that we have the great gift of community as we age! No doubt, each of us as we age we will experience varying degrees of diminishment and vulnerability; ongoing opportunities to find ourselves as Pedro Arupe, SJ says, “more and more in the hands of God. This is what I have wanted all my life from my youth. But now there is a difference; the initiative is entirely with God....” As members of a community we mutually support one another at each moment of our life development but especially when we are in need of greater supports or structures that will assist us in the living out of our vowed life to its fullest capacity. And as members of a community, it is important that we establish guidelines against which we can each measure ourselves to assess the quality of our lives as we age. This is the purpose of the guidelines we are reviewing with you today. This Guideline is meant to encourage our personal involvement in our life process. It is a “tool” if you will for each of us to use to evaluate our needs and to pay attention to that time in our life when we may need to consider either putting more supports in place for ourselves or consider moving to a setting that will provide those supports. Inherent in this guideline are the 4 principles already spelled out for us in our Mid‐Atlantic Community Vision for Health and Wellness:

1. We encourage sisters to be actively involved in their health care decisions to the degree they are able and as long as they are able.

2. We respect each sister’s privacy with regard to her health information while acknowledging that as members of the Community, each sister has the responsibility to share her health information with the appropriate community representative.

3. We support the concept of aging in place, while recognizing the need to balance the reality of our vowed life, available resources and the Community’s financial capacity.

4. We commit to provide our sisters access to the types of care they need and to monitor the quality of these services.

This Guideline was reviewed by the Life and Ministry Facilitators and Sister Anna Marie Tag and they went through quite a few iterations before we came to this final product. The expectation is that in its final form it will be used by the individual sister to assess the quality of her living situation and also by the Life and Ministry Facilitators and, as applicable, those in the living situation, to discern the best decision which enables the sister to live her life according to our Mid‐Atlantic Vision for Health and Wellness.

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Psychology of Ongoing Life Development Questions for ongoing reflection

What are the strengths of living in community that help you to grow and develop as a person?

What are my needs and how do I go about getting them met? What enhances my life and how often do I take to engage in those

things? What am I passionate about, interested in? What are my, gifts, capabilities, assets, mission in life, purpose?

What are my vulnerabilities and how do I cope with them? Are there areas of my life that I am neglecting or that I am worried

about? What will I do to address this?

How often do I do something different, something completely new, something that for me would be a positive kind of risk?

An exercise to assess you own life development.

Draw a life line and take several periods of reflection over a few weeks or a month to consider a review of your life

development. You can use ten year increments or the schematic presented: early adulthood, adulthood I or adulthood II,

or old age, and name for yourself the happy successful times /the difficult times/your accomplishments/failures; what did

you learn, how did you grow from the experiences? Who were the people who have influenced/ supported you along the

way? What did each phase of your life contribute to who you are today?

After you take the significant reflection time to look over your life, spend time naming what you feel Look at what have

been your personal struggles or challenges relative to my emotional health, my physical health, my ministerial life, my

communal life? Notice any patterns. How are you doing with these things now in your life? Is there something you’d like

to change? How might you go about this?

Suggested readings:

Bateson, Mary Catherine, Composing a Further Life, the Age of Active Wisdom. (Vintage Books, Random House Inc., New York, 2010).

Lawrence‐Lightfoot, Sara, The Third Chapter: Passion, Risk, and Adventure in the 25 years after 50. (Sarah Crichton Books, Farrar,

Straus, and Giroux, New York, 2009).

Whitehead, Evelyn E, and James D., Transforming Our Painful Emotions, Spiritual Resources in Anger, Shame, Grief, Fear, and

Loneliness. ( Orbis Books, Maryknoll, New York, 2010).

Whitehead, James D., and Evelyn E., Nourishing the Spirit, the Healing Emotions of Wonder, Joy, Compassion and Hope. (Orbis

Books, Maryknoll, New York, 2012).

mid atlantic community fall 2012 consultative gatherings … › pdf › cgc slides.pdf ·...

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