Negotiation Podcast by Steve Young

http://ecorner.stanford.edu/authorMaterialInfo.html?mid=1739

 Summary by Jeff McNeill

jeff@jeffmcneill.comhttp://jeffmcneill.com

2008, 2009

Contents

• Overview• Excuses• Soft Skills• Understanding Weakness• How to Deal with Others• Perspective• Goals, Perception• Getting to Yes• Summary• Reorganized

Overview

• Negotiation is the great, everyday skill o Classic negotiation for contractso Subtle negotiation among teammates

• Some negotiation tacticso Endurance/stamina, wear people downo Overprepare, data-driven, facts, logic

• Motivationo Find out what people need for energy

• Human natureo We try to do most with least efforto Inspire by through self-sacrifice

 Excuses

• Human nature to want to explaino People don’t respond to thiso Never show sign of victimizationo Don’t give excuseso People want accountability

• People want to hear “I messed up”o But also, “I’m going to go fix it”

• Must take accountability for actions

 Soft Skills

• In leadership, soft skills are hard skillso Based on love, respect, knowing peopleo Can't do anything without a great team

• Use soft skills to individually motivate o Individually, some are demand resistanto Some need to have it be their idea

• Stepping in other persons’ shoeso Knowing what they need at that timeo Know, motivate, anticipate individually

 Understanding Weakness

• Self-analysis of strengths/weaknesseso What am I good at? What holes? o What gets me into trouble?o Some things can fix, others cannoto People control through others' weaknesses

• Study strengths and weaknesseso Make changes, identify, hide "tells"

• Study opponents weaknesseso Always allow people a way out

 How to Deal with Others

• Understand people around youo Get to yes by working with strengthso Play coaches’ game, will get to play

• Don’t engage if there is no wino Keep to happy

• Look at where others’ are coming fromo What is their situation, need?o What can you give them?

• Appropriate attitudeo We are in this together, let’s figure out ways to be more

productive together

 Perspective

• I screwed it up, but am going fix it• Most of life is managing relationships

o Think “What is their experience?”o What is my hole? What to change?

• “You’re not that big a deal”o Hubris can be devastatingo Don’t lose self in negotiation, winning

• Keep to gratitude o Recognize the contributions of others

 Goals, Perception

• Negative side to things we are good ato Get rid of the things bad ato Get better at things mediocreo Continually improve things good at

• Main goal: See how good it can geto Be the dumbest guy in the room

• Perception is 9/10ths of the law o Use how perceived to your advantage

 

 Getting to Yes

• Everyone has unique, individual needso Get to comfort, so people share needso Put air in process, time to discover

• Some people just won’t like you• Relationships help but take time• Can be a good ploy to just do nothing• Am I a people skill person?

o Learn by observation these skills

 Summary

• Everyday skill, both classic and subtle• Tactics, endurance, preparation• Human nature• Soft skills, how to handle and motivate• Other people’s shoes• Strength and weakness analysis• Don’t engage if no win• Be accountable• Perspective• Perception• Unique, individual needs

 Reorganized Summary• Negotiation everywhere

o Classic, subtle, everyday• Tactics

o Take accountabilityo Enduranceo Preparationo Others' unique needs o Others' strengths o Others' weaknesses o Don’t engage if no wino Understand perceptions

• Strengths/weaknesseso How good can you be?o Do an analysis of selfo Know weaknesseso Adapt, improveo Strengths can blindo Keep perspective

• Be in others’ shoeso Understand/know otherso What motivates themo Their unique needs, strengths,

weaknesses