Newswriting

Some more tips for writing hard news stories

To do: “Starting the Story” Worksheet

Passive Voice – avoid it!

Two people were arrested

What’s the problem with passive voice here?

Active Voice

Police arrested two people.

Much better!

(Active Voice Worksheet)

Adjectives and Adverbs – careful not to clutter your copy with them

Adjectives and adverbs may add color:

The depressed and lonely man fired angry shots willfully at police.

But active verbs and detail do a better job and decrease the tendency to be subjective

Pulling his weapon from the pocket of his overcoat, the man fired three shots at police.

Don’t use unfamiliar names in the lede

Readers grasp information more quickly if you start with something they can understand. You can add details later.

A local high school girl won the national 200-meter freestyle championship on Tuesday.

The student, Mary Jones, a senior at Central High. …

Beginning with Time Element – Avoid it!

At 3 p.m., March 18, in the high

school gym, Robert Brown spoke.

BORING! Time and date (the “when” angle)

are almost never important enough to merit

first consideration in the lead

Don’t Bury the Lede!

Burying the lead means the writer places the major element severalparagraphs down in the story.

On Friday, May 19, and Saturday, May 20, the Valley League Championship Track Meet was held in Prarie Hill. Schools in the league are Monroe, Carlton, Williams, Newland, Littlefield, Evanston, Prairie Hill, and Corbett.

Prairie Hill's boys team placed third, scoring 103 points. Top scoring efforts on the team were put out by Tom Lawrence with 28.5 points and Syd Sidewell with 24 points.

The girls team placed fourth with 94 points. The girls team was strong in the distances with a one, two finish in the 1,500 meter and 3,000 meter.

Focus on an Angle

The following lede is filled with details that don'tbelong in a lede. It is basically written in chronological order rather than focusing on the“angle.“

Last Friday, March 18, all of the sophomore, juniorand senior students assembled in the gymnasium. After Student Body President Gary Winchman led thestudents in the flag salute, Vice Principal BarryJones presented Sen. Robert Brown, who talked aboutecology.

Don’t back into the lede . . .

This happens when the lede has not been written with the most important information first. If a writer backs into the lead, the most important information is often near the end of the lead paragraph, when it should be first.

Yuck: Dr. Robert P. Fowler, Southwestern University president, announced today that a medical school will be established on the campus next year

Better: A medical school will be established at Southwestern University next year, President Robert P. Fowler announced today.

Question Ledes – Avoid!

The reporter’s job is to inform, not ask questions.

How can auto insurance rates be

lowered?

I don’t know; that’s why I’m reading your article!

However . . .

If you are clever, it might work:

What is born in dung, makes love

in flight, has no sting, and

doesn't travel before 10 in the

morning? The love bug, that's

what. The pesky, little,

windshield-smearing, radiator-

clogging love bug.

(2 activities: “What not to do” and 5 Ws and H identification)

Delayed Ledes

A delayed lede can take several paragraphs to begin to tell a story, as opposed to hard news ledes.

Delayed ledes can use description, anecdotes, scene-setting or background information to pull the reader into the story.

These ledes take a slower approach and lede up to the “nut graf,” the paragraph that explains what the story is about.

Example of Delayed Lede

Remember those karaoke videos from three years ago that somehow wound up on Facebook? They were embarrassing for the few hours they spent at the top of your Facebook profile, and then they were buried under a cascade of new updates.

But on Thursday, Facebook started rolling out a revamped profile design called Timeline that makes a user’s entire history of photos, links and other things shared on Facebook much more accessible with a single click. This may be the first moment that many of Facebook’s 800 million members realize just how many digital breadcrumbs they’ve been leaving on the site — and on the Web in general.

For better or worse, the new format is likely to bring back a lot of old memories. But going forward, it could also make it harder to shed past identities — something that people growing up with Facebook might struggle with as they transition from high school to college, and from there to the working world. …… (STORY CONTINUES)

Following the lede . .

The rest of the story: Paragraphs should be short: one – two

sentences. Add details in order of importance while

explaining the story (inverted pyramid) Each quotation is a paragraph unto itself

Hard news story

Police arrested dozens of people during a raid of an Occupy San Francisco encampment outside the Federal Reserve building early Sunday.

San Francisco police officer Albie Esparza said that around 4 a.m. officers arrested about 55 people for illegal lodging.

No officers or demonstrators were injured, but Esparza said some officers were spit on and one officer was pushed by demonstrators during the arrests.According to Esparza, before police moved in on the encampment demonstrators had been warned on an hourly basis over a 24-period that they were subject to arrest.

The arrests Sunday come after at least 85 people were arrested Wednesday when police cleared a separate Occupy encampment in nearby Justin Herman Plaza.

(Story deconstruction activity)

Attribution – a must!

If the reporter did not see it or hear it, he must attribute the fact to someone else.

According to the restaurant owner, the man pulled his weapon from the pocket of his overcoat and fired three shots at police.

(Attribution Worksheet)

Associated Press Style

The Associated Press Stylebook consists of clear and simple rules for newspaper writing style. Most newspapers adhere to the AP Stylebook. The New York Times has its own stylebook, which closely follows AP style. The AP Stylebook has been around since the mid-1970s and is updated every couple of years.

(AP Style Activity)

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