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  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

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    SS

    Crush the line every week at The happy cow,scores sports bar & grill or buffalo wings & rings.

    take your shot at $10,000! Hurry, the deadline to turnIN your Week 13 picks is Saturday at 5pm!

    3 8 10Fun with Corporate Welfare | 7 Day Live Music Guide | Ask a Mexican

    VOLUME ONE

    ISSUE EIGHT

    11 .29 .12

    "

    I'mn

    othereforyouramusem

    ent.You'rehereformine."

    JohnnyRotten

    RUN, TURKEY,

    RUN!Sports pg 6

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    TX

    CITIZEN

    1111N.

    Waln

    utAvenue

    NewBraun

    fels,

    TX78130

    830.8

    37.9

    321

    Alloriginalcontentiscopyright

    TXCitizen.

    TXC

    itizenispublished

    everyThursday.

    One

    copy(perperson)oTXCitize

    nis

    availablereeocharge,withtheprior

    writtenconsentoTXCitizenrequir

    edto

    removemultiplecopiesromdistrib

    ution

    poin

    ts.

    Multiplecopiesandbackissues

    areavailableatTXCitizenofces

    or

    $2.50each.

    STAFF/

    CONTACT

    Publisher/Editor-in-ChieMikeReyno

    lds

    ArtD

    irectorKaylaWa

    llace

    SalesRepsChantMazy,

    ChaseCochran

    Editorial:[email protected]

    Advertising:sa

    [email protected]

    Distribution:

    [email protected]

    PHOTO

    CREDITS

    Cover,Sports:

    MikieFarias

    CitizenDo

    g:

    CitizenSta

    ff

    2 TX CITIZEN

    table of contents

    1st WordWe break down th is weeksCity Council meeting so you canhave a life.

    5Citizen DogThese twin dogs want to own you.

    Advice fromUncle EselGot a problem? You will.

    12

    11

    14Community CalendarThings to do. Go do em.

    3Sports

    An ot he r su cc es sf ul Tur key Tro t,and the end of the line forSmithson Valley football.6

    The Beer HunterWh en Mi tc he ll dr in ks ,we al l le ar n so me th in g.

    15

    10The CountysMost WantedIts one way to get famous.

    Ask a MexicanGustavo offends in two languages.

    The Fork ReportStarchy goodness courtesy of

    the Spud Ranch.

    Your Horoscope,Featuring the Heavenly Bodies

    Dont make a move without i t .

    13

    8Citizen Soundcheck

    The ONLY guide of its kind forthe NB/SM Metroplex!

    Last WordGo ahead and pick up that extra

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    FACEBOOK.COM/TXCITIZEN 3

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    New Braunfels, TX

    Wow. Big doings o late. Lets jump right in

    Issue One: This is huge. HUGE.

    For months now, weve beenpointing out that the 4-B Board,which operates as a 501(c)(3) non-prot organization,has been operating without aederal tax ID number.

    We requested the number romthe City and were told that they dont havea document responsive to our request. Wechecked with the Internal Revenue Service and

    they couldnt nd one either. We asked DistrictOnes Richard Zapata i he could come up withit, and he checked with the City Attorney, whotold them no, 4-B does not have a ederal taxid number, but that 4-B doesnt need one, (eventhough, yeah, it does).

    On Monday we asked District Fours rep,Sandy Nolte, about the phantom tax id and shesaid thatyes, 4-B does indeed have a ederaltax id number, although she couldnt tell us

    what it is, and she declined to tell us who toldher that the number exists. Oh dear. Ohhhhdear. Perhaps you, gentle reader, will havebetter luck getting that inormation out o her.You can reach Sandy by phone at 830-221-4000, option 4, or by email at [email protected]. You can get back to us at [email protected] when you nd out. Thanks or your help.

    Later Monday night, City Council gottogether or another marathon meeting

    designed to numb even the most nimble ominds, with the usual expensive results.

    Issue Two: First up, Council gave the ok tohand over nearly 12 million taxpayers dollarsto the developers o the Creekside complex.Granted, this deal was put together some timeago, and Council couldnt really get out othis payment, but it is yet another example ohow New Braunels taxpayer dollars are just

    shufed rom one million-dollar entity to another.As a an o the ree market, I rmly believe

    it should be allowed to prevail here in NB, butthe ree market isnt operating at all i taxpayermoney is involved the City and 4-B aresimply picking winners and losers, President

    Obama style. Apparently no one is willingto simply build and make massive

    amounts o money here without

    a public payo to go with it,and the local government ismore than happy to play ball.#corporatewelare

    Issue Three: The highlycontroversial Edwards Aquier

    Recovery Implementation Program,or EARIP, which gave control o theComal Springs to the San Antonio Water

    System, has more demands this timethey want the City Manager to enter intoan interlocal agreement with the EdwardsAquier Authority or unding o the HabitatConservation Plan Program, a program thatthe US Fish and Wildlie Service has alreadytold us we dont need.

    Council voted to approve that one, whichwould let City Manager Michael Morrison getstarted on the projects, but then on the very

    next item, voted against all the projects thatthe rst vote was relevant to, those projectsbeing the Old Channel Restoration, AquaticVegetation, Non-Native Animal Control, GillParasite and Low Impact Development.

    Richard Zapata asked i that OldChannel Restoration included all three arms osaid channel as it turns out it doesnt. It onlyapplies to the area surrounding the so-calledprivate island. Which, o course, gures.

    That vote against went 4-3, but thenMorrison pulled something hes done oncebeore, back on the Stormwater Utility Fee he called or a do-over. And or the secondtime, Council bit on rescinding a vote that theyhad just taken. Let me say that again: Councilvoted, the City Manager complained aboutthe result, so Council overturned their vote. Isuspect that both Morrison and I are equallysurprised that worked more than once, so Ive

    got to give it up or the man hes got thesepeople so tightly wrapped around his ngerthat he risks losing it to necrosis.

    Continued on next page.

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    4 TX CITIZEN

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    Continue rom previous page.

    It should be noted that Stephen Diggesrailed against the motion, on the groundshat Bio-West, who would be granted theontracts or three o the ve items, was also

    involved in putting the whole project together,hich, to any astute observer looks like a

    erious confict o interest. Digges saw that,rgued passionately against it, and in true

    tephen Digges style wait or it wait orit waaaaaait he went ahead and votedo approve the deal.

    In case you missed that: Digges arguedehemently against the HCP projects on the

    basis o confict o interest, and then votedor them. This continuing tactic allows himo look tough against the City Managementnd the local powers-that-be while towing

    he line or them at the same time. Absolutely

    masterul. Between Morrison and Digges, theily market in this town is all sewn up.

    Issue Four: City Management wanted torun a $59,000 study to see i its easible tollow businesses to recycle the tons o cans,

    bottles, and cardboard they throw out everyeek. We already know businesses want this

    ervice, and even Council could see that weont need to drop nearly 60k to nd that out

    gain. The consultants lost out on that one,6-1, with only Mayor Gale Pospisil in avor.

    Issue Five: The Chamber o Commerceas back, looking or a two-year PR dealith the City at a 4-B cost o $350,000 per.

    It should be noted that in 2010, according tohe Citys data, they did the very same jobor $234,569. In 2011 they got a $55,000raise, ollowed by a $16,800 raise in 2012.Now they want another $43,000 raise. WTF.

    Let me just point out, in case you didntknow, that the Chamber o Commerce isnt

    government entity its a private club thatharges its members plenty to belong to it.hey shouldnt be getting tax money. How

    much 4-B money have you gotten to developour business? None? Really? Because Silvertate Helicopters and the Scooter Store haveotten plenty, and much o that Scooter Storeough went right into the hands o Bob

    Krueger or his lobbying eorts, and he justhappened to have a wie on City Council

    hen those deals went through. Im startingo think that our tax dollars are just there tonrich certain well-connected residents o ourair city. Actually no, that would be crazy.

    Anyway, the Chamber got their raiseby unanimous vote. Hooray!

    Issue Six: The Chamber was back,looking or $56,000 in Hotel/Motel Tax toadd Gruene and the County Courthouse tothe Citys walking tour. Because, o course,it costs $56,000 to add Gruene and theCounty Courthouse to the Citys walking tour.Unanimous approval. Good lord.

    Issue Seven: As usual, Police Chie TomWibert got his way, and now, instead ousing all 17 local tow truck companies orits vehicle relocation and impound needs, theCity will use just one, much to the chagrino all 17 tow truck companies. That onewent 4-3, with Zapata, District Twos MarkGoodner, and Digges dissenting. No wordon what will happen should all 17 companies

    submit identical bids or the job.

    Issue Eight: Pristine Texas Rivers got itsmake-up contract, the one that makes surethey get paid o even though the rivers donthave any trash in them anymore, with theaward o $141,748 to empty out the ParksDepartments land-based trash cans. Man,we are getting sucked dry by consultants andcontractors. Ill empty the trash or hal o that.

    Issue Nine: This is something that wentdown the Friday beore Thanksgiving, but itsvitally important the City lost its SupremeCourt appeal on the original Tube-Tax, withdamages expected to be set at about hal amillion dollars. The City is expected to appealthat amount all the way back to the SupremeCourt, urther enriching the Citys San Antonio-based legal team. But thats not the real story.

    The real story is that we had that piece onCitizen Radio minutes ater the decision washanded down, but both the Houston-ownedHerald-Zeitung and KGNB radio waited untilthe busiest travel day o the year, the daybeore Thanksgiving, to report the story.

    Six days ater the act.Im certain thats nothing to be

    concerned about.

    \m/

    Mike ReynoldsPublisher/Editor-in-Chie

    B

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    FACEBOOK.COM/TXCITIZEN 5

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  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

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    6 TX CITIZEN

    RUNNING:The annual Comal Cops for Kids Turkey Trot took over Gruene on Thanksgiving Day, with hundreds of runners bravingnear frigid temperatures of 72 to 74 degrees, all to benet the Comal Cops for Kids Foundation. The Foundation supports the local Green and Blue

    Santa programs, among other worthy causes.Jason Trevino came in rst in the 5K division, while Tom Turkey (Deputy Sheri Tommy Ward) did his best to outrun the kids in the quarter-mile

    Turkey Chase. The kids eventually got the best of him, and from all accounts, cooked up real nice and wasnt too dry at all.

    FOOTBALL: The Smithson Valley Rangers wrapped up their near-perfect season with a 28-20 loss to Brandeis in last Fridays 5A secondround playo game, nishing the season with an 11-1 record overall, and a 5-0 record in district play.

    SPONSORED BY MIKIE FARIAS PHOTOGRAPHYVisit www.mikiefarias.com for more photos!

    Event Coordinators Comal County

    Deputy Sheriff Tommy Ward, (left,

    in turkey costume), and Comal

    County District Attorney Jennifer

    Tharp (right, red shirt).

  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

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    8/168 TX CITIZEN

    Thu 11.29Adobe Verde

    Garrett Heinrichs8pm

    AJs Ale HouseRock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show9pm

    Billys Ice HouseBubba Westly & The Interstate Heartbreak8pm

    Black & Tan PubMark Sebby9pm

    Black Whale Pub3 Man Front9pm

    Cheatham Street WarehouseSeth Candan & Brian Keane9pm

    Gruene HallChris Ruest Band6pm

    Oma Gruenes Secret GartenJam Night w/ The Kinfo lk6pm

    On the Hal Shell Oyster BarJunior Nash9pm

    Phoenix SaloonLucas Taylor5pm

    Rileys TavernMatt Begley & Bitter Whiskey9pm

    River Road Ice HouseBig Red Drum Showcase8pm

    Tavern in the GrueneBlake and Fallon

    8pmTriple Crown

    Erickson6pmSp_aces, Bonsai Nation, Are You Crazy?10pm, $5

    Uptown Piano BarAshley Stone8pm

    Vineyard at GrueneAlli Mattice7pm

    Fri 11.30Adobe Verde

    The Knowhows8pm

    AJs Ale HouseRock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show9pm

    Billys Ice HouseJake Kellen8:30pm

    Black & Tan PubALLus K ILLus, All Sides Equal9pm

    Black Whale Pub2 Rivers Trio9pm

    Cheatham Street WarehouseOwen Temple Trio9pm

    Gruene HallShawn Colvin8pm, $35

    The Happy CowHappy Cow Turns Three Years Old!

    Kim Meeks8pm

    Oma Gruenes Secret GartenAdam Johnson & the Pay Mes6pm

    On the Hal Shell Oyster Bar3 Man Front9pm

    Phoenix SaloonDaniel Thomas Phipps

    5pmDJ B.Read9pm

    Rileys TavernLonesome Dave Fisher8pm

    River Road Ice HouseJeremiah Houston Band8pm

    Tavern in the GrueneMonty Guitar Tyler8pm, $3

    Triple CrownRick Lugo6pmGiant Salvinia, The Red Direct, Knael10pm, $5

    Uptown Piano BarBarry Adams8pm

    Vino en VerdeSteve Beltran8pm

    Vineyard at GrueneRelay for Life FundraiserZack Walther7pm

    Sat 12.1Adobe Verde

    Dim Lit Daylight8pm

    AJs Ale HouseRock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show9pm

    Billys Ice HouseThe No Refund Band8pm

    Black & Tan PubWinter Bash!9pm

    Black Whale PubVagabonds del Sol9pm

    Cheatham Street WarehouseSons of Fathers9pm, $5

    Gruene HallHot Texas Swing Band1pmCarolyn Wonderland & Guy ForsythHoliday Roastw/ Shelley King7pm, $15

    The Happy CowKnucklehead8pm

    Oma Gruenes Secret GartenKen Raba1pm

    Adam Johnson & the Pay Mes6pm

    Phoenix SaloonChesterfieldw/ The LaRues

    9pmRileys Tavern

    Luke Adair & The Big Bills9pm

    Texas Music TheaterThose Nights9pm

    Triple CrownScott H. Biram10pm, $8

    Uptown Piano BarJohn Maclean8pm

    Vineyard at GrueneKenn, Ashley & Shawn7pm

    Vino en VerdeDry River Religion9pm

    Water2WineTree Trimming Par ty!A cappella Christmas Carolersw/ Merrie Court Singers5pm

    Sun 12.2Adobe Verde

    Ross Brunner8pm

    Billys Ice HouseHorseshoes & Hand Grenades8pm

    Cheatham Street WarehouseToy DriveMike Ethan Messick & More1pm

    YOUR LIVE MUSIC GUIDE

  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

    9/16FACEBOOK.COM/TXCITIZEN 9

    Fri 11.30

    AntonesSouthbound Drive, Shakey Graves,

    Love Leighs

    8pm, $7

    The Continental ClubClub Lineup:

    The Blues Specialists, 6:30pmDan Dyer, 10pm, $22

    Ben Kweller, 11:30pm

    Gallery Lineup:

    Liz Morphis, 8:30pm

    The Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

    Floores Country StoreRyan Beaver

    w/ James Delgado8pm, $8

    Red Eyed FlyCircadian Rythms

    w/ The Morning Sun, Your Friendly Ghost,

    Cityline Horizon

    9:30pm, Outside

    Sams Burger JointSteve Forbert, Patty Larkin8pm, $23

    Stetson BarChris Salinas & Wildgrass Band

    9:30pm

    Stubbs BBQFull Service

    10pm, Inside, $8

    Thirsty Horse SaloonSmall Town Habit

    8pm

    Sat 12.1

    AntonesWanda Jackson

    w/ Jonny Fritz & The In-Laws,

    Ruby Dee & The Snakehandlers

    8pm, $20-$25

    The Continental ClubClub Lineup:

    Redd Volkart, 3:30pm

    Ruby James, 10pm, $10

    Rosie Flores & Marti Brom, 12am

    Gallery Lineup:

    Scarlett Olson, 8:30pm

    The Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

    Floores Country StoreGary P Nunn

    8pm, $12

    Red Eyed FlyDangerous Road

    w/ Wellborn Road

    9:30pm, Outside

    Sams Burger JointSlaid Cleaves

    w/ Jonny Burke

    8pm, $18

    Stetson BarChris Saucedo & New Age Outlawz

    9:30pm

    Stubbs BBQDethklokw/ Machine Head, All That Remains,

    The Black Dahlia Murder

    6pm, Inside, $35

    Gruene HallChristine Albert & Chris Gage12pmGreg Trooper4pm

    Oma Gruenes Secret GartenSlim Bawb2pm

    Phoenix SaloonThe Al Barlow Show2pm

    TBA7pm

    Mon 12.3Billys Ice House

    The Third Coast Outlaws8pm

    Black & Tan PubSteven Roloff8pm

    Cheatham Street WarehouseRandy Rogersw/ Surprise Guest9pm

    Gruene HallBret Graham6pm

    River Road Ice HouseEmpty Handed Vagabonds8pm

    Tavern in the GrueneCourt Nance Accident8pm

    Triple CrownGerrys Kids6pmChief & TheDoomsdayDevice9pm

    Tues 12.4Billys Ice House

    Steven Roloff & Kyle Reedw/ Dan McCoy8pm

    Black & Tan PubGarrett Snowden9pm

    Cheatham Street WarehouseJeff Strahan9pm

    Gruene HallTom Gillam & Friends6pm

    Rileys TavernManzy Lowry9pm

    Tavern in the GrueneRoots & Branches

    7pmThe Blooms9:30pm

    Triple CrownBen Schane6pmHoliday Mountain, Hair Farmers9pm, $3

    Wed 12.5Billys Ice House

    Will Owen Gage8pm

    Cheatham Street WarehouseKent Finlays Songwriters Circle9:30pm

    Gruene HallEd Jurdi & Gordi Quist6pm

    The Happy CowGary Herman & Friends

    8pm

    Rileys TavernTyler Cannon9pm

    River Road Ice House3 Man Front8pm

    Triple CrownScott Wood & The Kyle Project6pm

    Anna Beth & Gost, G Clef , SymmaTree,Aye Cue, Colin Gee9pm, $5

    Uptown Piano BarJohn Maclean8pm

    YOUR L IVE MUSIC GUIDE

    OUTOF

    COMAL COUNTY SASK A MEXICAN!

    !

  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

    10/1610 TX CITIZEN

    By Gustavo Arellano

    Dear Mexican:In President Bushs State o the

    Union address, he reiterated a needor a guest worker program. What is

    your opinion o such a program? Te

    program seems like mierda that screwspeople over in the long run to me, butwhat do I know.

    una guerita por un mundo sinmuros :-)

    Dear Gabachita or a World WithoutBorder Walls: Sorry Im answering yourquestionwhat, ve years later? Siete?But the sad part about my laziness is that

    the question remains relevant, and whatRepublicans once dismissed as Aztlanistaclaptrap rom the mouth o Dubya (who willremain the best GOP riend to Mexis wellever havemark my palabras) is now thegospel theyre preaching ater the disasterthat was their outreach eorts to Latinosduring the 2012 presidential election. Itsbeen absolutamente HILARIOUS to seeRepublicans wake up and smell the tacos

    over a decade ater Latinos became apolitical orce, to see them lamely propup Florida Senator Marco Rubio as apresidential candidate (the only position hesworthy o is being Secretary o Coos), tosee gabacho pundits ask themselves whatLatino voters want without having a Latinoon their panels or asking said voters, andmost laughablythe idea o resurrecting theguest-worker program. Conservatives love

    the idea o having Mexicans work cheaplybut not being able to become citizens, butits an idea thatll ail as badly as it did therst time around, rom the 1940s until the1960s. For the last time, America: Mexicansare not just workers; theyre humans whollnotice living conditions are better here andwill want to stay herehow ya gonna keepem down on the rancho ater theyve seenParee? A border ence? P-shaw. And while its

    true some Mexicans might want to only workhere and go back to Mexico, demographicsand history show otherwise. Immigrationreorm without some sort o amnesty is like aburrito without the tortillaand who the hellbesides calorie-conscious hipsters want that?

    Dear Mexican:

    I was with some cousins or a week

    in Lindsay, a major orange-pickin

    city in Central Caliornia. Tey own

    a mini-market and Id go and help

    them everyday and got to know some

    customers. Many o the Mexican

    customers would come in and yell

    Agooshtoo or wey to me and m

    cousins, and wed yell it back and the

    would smile and get their beer. When

    they would leave they would say a

    rato and wed yell it back. I asked m

    cousins but they didnt really know

    much except that the rst two were

    probably curse words. Any help?

    Gabacho rom gilroy

    Dear Gabacho Wey is easytheyre

    saying gey, which as I wrote so long ago,

    in one o the rst Ask a Mexican! columns,

    is the ass o Mexican Spanish, even though

    it derives rom the word or ox. But its not

    a ghting word, and you and your primos

    should be honoredMexi men use gey as

    a orm o endearment among each other. I

    they really wanted to insult you, theyd call

    you puto, pendejo, baboso, orbetter yet

    pinche puto pendejo baboso. Agooshtoo

    sounds like a gusto (to be at ease), but it

    very well could be an indigenous language

    like Mixtec or Triqui, since the Central Valley

    is home to tens o thousands o olks romOaxaca. A rato is the elided orm o al

    rato, which means laterin this case,

    theyre telling ustedes geyes that theyll

    be back in a bit or more beer. Now that I

    answered your pregunta, do me a avor and

    leave some cerveza on credit or my geyes

    so they can be agusto, por avor!

    MOST WANTED

    $200REWARD

    COMAL COUNTY S

    BASS,JUSTIN BRYANMale 509 180 lbsDOB: 08/08/1986CHARGE: Courtsmotion to revokeprobation forpossession of a

    controlled substancepg 1 under 1 gram

    CLOUGH,RONNIE DEANMale 506 182 lbsDOB: 12/31/1960CHARGE: Two countsof bail jumping/fail toappear and two countsof fail to appear foraggravated assaultwith deadly weapon

    GILDERSON,

    DANIELLE MARIEFemale 504 150 lbsDOB: 11/01/1985CHARGE:

    Aggravated perjury

    DROEMER,TIMOTHY AARONMale 509 200 lbsDOB: 07/22/1966CHARGE: Two countsof aggravated assaultwith deadly weaponand evading arrestwith vehicle

    ADAIR,JOHN PAULMale 510 270 lbs

    DOB: 12/06/1968CHARGE: Theft of

    property over $1500under $20,000

    GONZALES,

    DAVID STARRMale 506 140 lbs

    DOB: 07/03/1979CHARGE: Two counts

    of forgery

    GONZALEZ,MARCELINO JRMale 505 145 lbs

    DOB: 08/07/1976CHARGE: Motion to

    revoke probationfor accident

    involving injury

    TREVIZO,ROBERTO ALFREDO

    Male 509 235 lbsDOB: 04/06/1968

    CHARGE: Two chargesof DWI with previous

    intoxication manslaughterconviction

    VALDEZ,

    DANIELMale 507 165 lbs

    DOB: 08/27/1986CHARGE:

    Aggravated kidnapping

    GREEN, SHANNONLOWELL

    Male 510 178 lbsDOB: 07/31/1975

    CHARGE:Aggravated perjury

    The names listed have been released in accordance with the Texas Public Information Act Code 552.001 st.seq.annotatedPublic Record and Information disclosure statues. This is a true and accurate account as of Monday, November 26, 2012at 10:45 am and may not be current by the time it is read. Do not try to apprehend anyone. For anonymous tips and rewards,

    please contact Crime Stoppers at: 24-Hour Phone number 830.620.3400; Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm 830.620.3411. These are

    listings of criminal warrants with the Sheriffs Office and are not indicative of guilt or innocence. Officers are to verify the statusof each warrant prior to making an arrest. Any person is innocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.

    FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARREST OF COMALCOUNTYS MOST WANTED.Callers will remain anonymous.

    830.620.3400 - 24-Hour

    830.620.3411 - Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm

    -ARRESTED

    -

    -ARRESTED

    -

    -A

    RRESTED

    -

    -ARRESTED

    -

    -ARR

    ESTED

    -

    -ARR

    ESTED

    -

    -ARRESTED

    -

    -ARRESTED

    -

    Ask the Mexican at [email protected], be his an onFacebook, ollow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano or ask him a video

    question at youtube.com/askamexicano!

    ASK A MEXICAN!!

    ADVICE FROM

    C S

  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

    11/16FACEBOOK.COM/TXCITIZEN 11

    Uncle Esel,

    I just came back rom visiting the

    border or the rst time and on the

    way back I had to stop at some long

    checkpoint where they asked me i I

    was a US citizen. Now I may come of

    as a smart ass but I am red-headed andreckled and I was raised in ennessee

    so I know even some dang high school

    graduate agent knows Im American.

    How is it legal to stop someone 50

    miles or more rom the border to ask

    them or ID or no reason at all?

    Lovingly Yours,

    Sarah Lynn

    Dear Sarah,In keeping with that ne Southern

    tradition, I see you have two names. Uncle

    Esel has been to Mexico lots o times in search

    o, how you say - entertainment venues

    - so I eel the same pain as you given my

    German good looks and my prominent jaw.

    The Supreme Court long ago held that such

    checkpoints were valid or the sole purpose

    o ascertaining i aliens were getting through.They were not intended or the purpose o

    detaining people who are citizens and they

    did not intend it as a means to have the eds

    ask or papers rom law-abiding citizens.

    The eds have stretched rulings and created

    a second and very protable side business

    known as drug interdiction. This new task

    however hides behind the checkpoint or

    citizenship checks, as on its own, it would be

    illegal. To make this short, other than askingabout citizenship, any other investigation

    requires probable cause to be established,

    but only as it occurs during the brie stop or

    immigration purposes and you cannot be

    otherwise detained without that cause. Just

    the same, the eds have a way o making up

    rules on the run and the internet is packed

    with videos o citizens who reuse to play

    along with the agents and are then sent ontheir merry way when they realize video is

    running. But be warned, there are also a ew

    videos o citizens getting the crap kicked out

    o them. Happy Travels.

    Love, K

    Uncle Esel,

    Are we ever going to get that

    Academy store in New Braunels?

    Tanks,

    Alex

    Dear Alex,That deal is o and Academy has no

    planned store on their books at this time.

    Not sure how it aected the deal, but among

    other concerns, they noticed a big drop in

    summer, water related products in nearby

    stores. Thats called a trickle eect i any city

    leaders are reading.

    Love, K

    Uncle Esel,

    So I hear the government is

    looking at banning bouncy houses.

    Is there nothing the government will

    leave alone?

    Fred

    Dear Fred,

    The government says a kid gets hurt

    every 46 minutes on a bounce house andthat trampolines also pose a similar risk.

    You know, the government does like to stick

    its nose into everything, and on occasion

    it is warranted, but the problem with kids

    is usually a problem with parents who ail

    to monitor their kids and with parents that

    ail to correct their kids who may be doing

    things that hurt others. I we just regulate

    and ban everything that could hurt us, then

    maybe the economy would prosper romall the bubble wrap and rubber bumper

    manuacturing that we will need. Two

    problems solved at once. I or one think

    that we cannot regulate enough to ever

    make up or bad parenting and I also miss

    my lawn darts.

    Love, K

    UNCLE ESEL

    Uncle K. Esel is a lietime resident o our air city, andis well known or his sage advice on a wide range otopics. I you fnd yoursel perplexed with no one toturn to, send your question to Uncle Esel at: [email protected]. Be sure to write Question or UncleEsel in the subject line o your email.

    THE

  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

    12/1612 TX CITIZEN

    This Week: Pedernales Brewings Classic IPAI imagine i the American crat beer scenecontinues the way it has in popularity, ourriends across the water will get jealous inthat way only the British can, envying theslightly less sophisticated, but younger and

    much more successul sibling. O course,the tide will pull in the other directionsome times, where we emulate ol QueensEngland. Heck, the whole idea o batteredand ried ood is a very British thing, and wecertainly picked it up with gusto ourselves.So, as with beer, especially the ever-popularIPA style, we can expect the jibes to comein a ew years or so. Oi, yew wont anybeer in yer oppy water? theyll say rombeneath their top hats, casually crushing a

    polio-stricken orphans orbital socket witha sterling silver cane (I assume nothing haschanged in England since Dickens.). Well,nuts to those guys! How can we not beourselves? How can we not take a beerknown to be loaded up on hops and LOADTHE HECK OUT OF THEM? Cranking thingsup to 11 is our way - The American Way.England invented sh and chips, but do you

    think theyd ever deep ry grape Kool-Aidand make bank on it? Not a chance.

    Now, to COMPLETELY contradict thespirit o the last paragraph, let me just be thevery rst ever to say, Hey America, maybewe should tone it back a little. Now, now,

    beore the egies go up, Im not saying weshould become Canada or anyone else thatputs royalty on their money. Im just sayingthat maybe we should be more like a classycaricature o ourselves like the New YorkTimes Al Hirschelds, rather than a twisted,nightmareish version like Hunter S. ThompsonsRalph Steadman (a Brit!). Dont take this tomean that the constant jealous ridicule rom theOld Country has gotten to Uncle Sams avoritenephew, because it hasnt. All Im saying is

    that sometimes they might have a point, andsometimes their way could also have merit.One such example o us toning it down

    a bit to take a lesson rom the UK is thePedernales Brewing Companys ClassicIPA. Its interesting and unusual to see an IPAadvertise itsel as Classic or English Style,as it does here. For those in the know itll bea welcome indicator o hoppy strength, but it

    may be bad i alled on dea ears. I youreused to the tongue wrinkling IPAs common tothe West Coast o the USA, English Style IPAswill eel like a not-even-pale-ale.

    Frequenters o my column will recall mymuch-documented distain or the whole IBUs

    or the sake o IBUs trend, so an EnglishStyle IPA is right up my alley. I had this onerom a bottle, quite resh rom the brewery byall sources. It poured a nice, clear copperwith a airly retained amount o head. Verypicturesque in an Imperial Pint. It had adistinct, but not aggressive nose to it, someherbal and grassy Cascade-ish hops and atinge o lemony tang. You dont get much othe malt in the nose, but it is balanced almostscientically well in the taste. It is slightly

    sweet rom the barley, and has a good toastycrystal malt favor. Moutheel is very thinand crisp, almost like a lager eel but withoutany odd yeast to change the clarity or favor.Doubly rereshing, not just in taste and palate-slaking ability, but also rereshing to see themoniker IPA shown not as a challenge or theweak-tongued, but simply as an indicator ora hoppy, enjoyable beer.

    WITH MITCHELL WILBURN

    Mitchell Wilburn is our resident bon vivant and arbiter o all thingsbarley. Send your beer questions to him at [email protected].

    HAPPY COWa n u d d e r k i n d a p l a c e

    B A R & G R I L L

    9103 FM 1102

    New Braunfels, TX 78130

    512.353.0030

    Nov 30HAPPY COW TURNS 3!

    Kim Meeks

    Dec 1KnuckleheadDec 6COW E OKE

    Dec 7Double R NothinDec 8 Tony Taylor

    Dec 213RD ANNUAL

    CHRISTMAS PARTY/1ST ANNUAL END OFTHE WORLD PARTY

    Mark Jungers,Jordan Minor & more!

    BELT SANDER RACES3RD SATURDAY

    OF EACH MONTHBLACK WHALE PUB

    Specializing inBelgium Beers

    100 Import Beers

    24 Beers on Tap

    Live Entertainment

    Full BarPool Tables Darts

    367 Main Plaza

    830-625-6605

    Biergarten andUnderground Wine Cellar

    Featuring Guadalupe Brewing Co. Beers

    Special Events Monthly

    Fresh HandmadeSandwiches and Salsa

    Private Parties- Catering

    Wedding Facilities Available

    Live Music Every Night

    Never a Cover

    Kid & Pet Friendly

    1263 Gruene Road 830.625.1045

    Call for Hours!

    omalovesyou.com

    Biergarten andUnderground Wine Cellar

    Featuring Guadalupe Brewing Co. Beers

    Special Events Monthly

    Fresh HandmadeSandwiches and Salsa

    Private Parties- Catering

    Wedding Facilities Available

    Live Music Every Night

    Never a Cover

    Kid & Pet Friendly

    1263 Gruene Road 830.625.1045

    Call for Hours!

    omalovesyou.com

    SILK SCREENING

    T-SHIRTS

    BAGS

    KOOZIES

    SCHOOL SPIRIT

    & MUCH MORE!

    [email protected]

    786 S Castell Ave #DNew Braunfels, TX 78130

    The Fork Report

  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

    13/16FACEBOOK.COM/TXCITIZEN 13

    This Week: Spud Ranch

    I I were stranded on a desert island and

    ound only one thing growing there that

    was edible, I would want it to be potatoes.

    Potatoes are my absolute avorite thing to

    eat. I enjoy them anyway you choose tocook them; baked, ried, mashed, chips,

    in a casserole, in soup, and the list goes

    on. Its no surprise that I would be quickly

    lured into a place called Spud Ranch. The

    creative ways to enjoy a baked potato

    there are endless.

    J. R. Gallegos is the owner o not one,

    but two Spud Ranches; New Braunels and

    San Marcos. I always wanted to own myown ranch, and now I have two, J. R. said.

    The restaurant in San Marcos is located right

    next to Bobcat Stadium and caters to college

    students. It has been open about 10 years.

    We opened the one here in New Braunels in

    April o 2010.

    With more than 20 dierent versions o

    baked potatoes on the menu, choosing just

    one is extremely dicult. I am still a big an

    o the Texas Original, which is the classic

    butter, cheddar, sour cream, chives, and

    bacon. I do also like the Ranch Hand, whichhas butter, chili, and cheddar. My next visit I

    am planning to try the Steak Spud, which has

    ribeye, cheddar, butter, and sauted onions.

    New Braunels and San Marcos each

    have dierent top picks rom the menu, J.R.

    said. In New Braunels, the avorite seems

    to be the Brisket Spud, which has chopped

    brisket with barbecue sauce, butter, cheese

    and sauted onions. San Marcos denitelyloves the Hot Wing with boneless bualo

    style chicken, hot wing sauce, butter,

    cheese, and your choice o ranch or blue

    cheese dressing.

    The restaurant also oers a delicious

    home-style Texas Burger and a variety o

    sandwiches, all served up on Texas Toast

    with hand-cut ries. In all and winter you

    can choose rom delicious hot soups like

    broccoli-cheese and loaded potato and o

    course chili and Frito pie. As you can see

    there is something or every taste bud,(even the kiddos), who can choose rom

    grilled cheese, mac n cheese, and chicken

    tenders. I you crave a little dessert, try the

    homemade brownies.

    Spud Ranch is located at 118 CommonStreet in New Braunels, and gets 3 orksand a big 10 gallon cowboy hat - get alonglittle doggie!

    The Fork Reportwith ann cousin

    Ann Cousin is a New Braunels based reelance writer. She canbe reached via e-mail at [email protected].

    Your Birthday this WeekWITH THE "HEAVENLY BODIES", HELEN AND EILEEN CUNNINGHAM

    Happy Birthday Sagittarius! You people have

    always been rebels. Right now panicked plebe-

    ians are trying to diet in between the winter

    feasts, but not you, you go against the grain. You

    know the smart money is on dieting later on downthe road... say, March or July. Sagittari have stron-

    ger hearts than the rest of mankind so for this

    week it's bacon wrapped anything!

    Dear Sagittarius: You've been lonely for a long

    time, dearie, and I'm sorry to share the sad truth

    with you - the position of Neptune this week

    dictates that, if you've yet to meet your soul mate,

    he or she will be crushed this week. And not

    emotionally crushed, but physically. Definitely by

    Saturday at 3:30pm. Get out there and meet new

    people, or that special someone is seriously

    going to die in a really awful way.

    the hungryGypsy

    Your RegiftingHeadquarters!Open 10 am/Closed Sunday

    Junior, Womens, MensName Brand Fashions

    Shoes, Accessories, Jewelry& Unique Furniture

    641 N. Walnut Ave, NB(Across from Town Creek Community)

    830.491.8055 or 210.243.9409

    Like us! /The Hungry Gypsy

    Gift Certificates & Layaway Available!

    www.rivasroofinggutters.com

    NEW ROOFS ROOF REPAIRS

    RESIDENTIAL COMMERCIAL

    CARPENTRY CARPORTS

    NEW GUTTERS GUTTER REPAIRS

    830.625.7900 NEW BRAUNFELS, TEXAS

    ROOFING & GUTTERS, INC

    830.837.9320

    ADVERTISE.

    NOW.

  • 7/30/2019 November 29 Reg

    14/1614 TX CITIZEN14 TX CITIZEN

    SURVIVE CHRISTMAS AT THE SEEKATZ!

    The Seekatz Opera House hosts its frst musical production sincethe 1941 fre, with the New Braunels Theatre Companys ChristmasSurvival Guide. Armed with a copy o A Christmas Survival Guide andan optimistic attitude, the cast charges into an urban holiday landscapesearching or the true essence o Christmas.

    Perormances are Friday, Nov. 30 and Friday, Dec. 7 at 8pm;Saturday, Dec. 1 and Saturday, Dec. 8 at 2:30pm and 8pm; andSunday, Dec. 2 and Sunday, Dec. 9 at 2:30pm. Tickets are $17 or

    adults, $15 or students/seniors and $12 or children 12 and under. Formore inormation, call 830-221-6506.

    RETAIL THERAPY FUNDRAISER

    River City Advocacy is raising unds to continue to provide its mentalhealth services ree o charge with a night o holiday shopping! Vendorsinclude Pampered Che, 31 Gits, Scentsy, Premier, Vault Denim andmore. Bring your riends! Saturday, December 1, 5 to 8pm, River City

    Advocacy, 145 Landa Street. For more inormation, call 830-643-0200.

    PET PICTURES WITH SANTA

    Santas coming to County Line Veterinary Clinic or his annual photoshoot with your pets! Photos are ree with a suggested donation toNew Braunels Puppy Playland. Santa is available on December 8 rom10am to noon, and December 11 rom 2 to 5. County Line VeterinaryClinic is located at 1928 S Seguin Ave, Suite 108, in New Braunels. Formore inormation, call 830-626-2582.

    GOT AN EVENT TO PROMOTE?Well get the word out or you!

    Send the details to [email protected].

    This Week's LineCrushers!Barry Napp: 4-1 @ Scores Sports Bar and Grill

    Tyler Olsen: 4-1 @ Buffalo Wings and Rings

    Matt Meyer: 4-1 @ Buffalo Wings and Rings

    Mike Tidwell: 4-1 @ The Happy Cow

    Tyler Armbruster: 4-1 @ The Happy Cow

    Week 12 Accuracy by League:First Place: Scores Sports Bar and Grill 52%

    Second Place: Buffalo Wings and Rings 51%Third Place: The Happy Cow 44%

    This Week's Top Participating League:

    THE HAPPY COW

    Crush the line every week at one of the four participating

    league bars, and take your shot at $10,000! Hurry, the

    deadline to turn IN your Week 13 picks is Saturday at 5pm!