6 M A X I M • A P R I L 2 0 1 4 G O T O M A X I M . C O M F O R M O R E

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Eva ForeverEva Longoria is once, twice, three times a Maxim cover girl [ Jan/Feb]. I applaud you and give you a standing ovation!—Joseph Suazo, via e-mailYou’re welcome, and thanks for reading. Side note: If “standing ovation” is code for something, please never write to us again! Mystic Bullshit In Jan/Feb you guys had a psychic named Laura predict who was going to be in the Super Bowl [Circus Maximus]. She said anybody from the South, something about horses, and the Patriots. If she’s going to be honest, why doesn’t she just say she has no fucking idea? She already picked half of the damn NFL.—Derik Diemer, via e-mailHold on a minute, Derik, are you implying that a psychic is maybe full of shit? Crazy! Incidentally, “shit” is as accurate a pre -diction as could have been made about this year’s Super Bowl.

Our BadIn regard to your Q&A with Army Sta� Sgt. Ty Carter [“Maxim’s Hometown Heroes”], he is a Medal of Honor recipient, not “winner.” Our nation’s highest award is not a popularity contest.—Spc. Casey Ash� eld, via e-mailPoor choice of words, great choice of hero. For those who missed it, we pro� led Sta� Sgt. Carter, who received the Medal of Honor for his heroism in Afghanistan. Once again, we salute you!

Kill ’Em With Hotness Salute to Derek Hutchison for winning Maximum Warrior, but where the hell are the hot female Warriors? —Dayna Walker 1st Sgt., U.S. Army (Ret.)See the answer to the next letter, Sarge.

Who is the hot blonde with the Makita rotary hammer [“Woman With a Tool”]?—Anthony, via e-mailThat’s Hometown Hottie Shannon Ihrke, a Marine Sergeant. America the beautiful!

Words With DorksJan/Feb’s Stu� section says that I could use Oakley’s goggles to “home in” on my friends’ locations. If I wanted to “home in” on them I’d drive over and knock. It’s “hone in,” homies.—Kirk J. from Cleveland, via e-mailKirk, you totally missed the point. We did want you to go to your friends’ house. They’d planned a “grammar douche” intervention. (BTW, “home in” is correct. Check Webster’s.)

Busting MythBustersI’ve worked with hot lead for most of my life, and what the MythBusters say about sticking your hand in hot lead [How To] is the stupidest thing I have ever read. —Nat Lane, via e-mailWe’d type a witty reply, Nat, but we’re having trouble because we just melted four � ngers o� our left hand in a pot of molten lead.

Fightin’ WordsRegarding the Maximum Warrior 4 contest [“Running and Gunning,” November], I’m glad they’re on our side. However, if the need arises to rescue a dozen overweight � sher -men from 200 miles o� shore, extract a hiker with a broken back, followed by a � ve-hour night search in the middle of the black ocean for an object the size of a volleyball, you’d better contact a U.S. Coast Guard Helicopter Rescue Swimmer. That is, if the 350 of us are not prosecuting other search-and-rescue operations. Keep up the good work.—Brad, via e-mailShout out to the USCG! Hey, MW 5 is starting up soon. Any Helicopter Rescue Swimmers game to come show your stu� ?

Each month MAXIM

empties its sack for you.

W E G O T I T I N T H E M A I L

The Pursuit of HairinessTo some bald is beautiful. But we � nd beauty in a product that masks deep-rooted insecurities about a growing bald spot. Enter SureThik, a shaker of � bers that you sprinkle in your hair to add girth. It came in the mail one day, and a� er a few shakes onto chief content o� cer Dan Bova’s head, his thin hair looked as full as the gorilla-esque patch on his back. $10, surethik.com

Odds & EvaThe Jan/Feb issue had you guys loving and loathing.

YOU HAVE E-MAIL.

We have an in-box. Send your love

and hate to: letters@maxim.comletters@maxim.com

Eva Longoria is once, twice, three times cover girl [ Jan/Feb]. I applaud

You’re welcome, and thanks for reading. Side note: If “standing ovation” is code for something, please never write to us again!

In Jan/Feb you guys had a psychic named Laura predict who was going to be in the Super Bowl [Circus Maximus]. She said anybody from the South, something about horses, and the Patriots. If she’s going to be honest, why doesn’t she just say she has no fucking idea? She already picked

Odds & EvaOdds & Eva