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Oh, boy! More typos! word errors awkward phrasing unclear wording word choice unclear referent agreement usage/idiom

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Page 1: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Oh, boy! More typos!

word errors

awkward phrasing unclear wording word choice unclear referent agreement usage/idiom

Page 2: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

--the wording is clumsy and awkward.

awk

Problem:

Thus,cooking, or toasting it, and then the bread, now toast will pop up by itself.

Page 3: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: rewrite the sentence

ProblemThus,cooking,

or toasting it, and then the bread, now

toast will pop up by itself.

Solution After cooking the bread, the toaster will

eject a piece of toast, ready

to eat.

Page 4: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: rewrite the sentence

Solution

Cooked bread, called toast,

will pop out of the toaster by itself when it

is ready.

Problem

Thus,cooking, or toasting it, and then the bread,

now toast will pop up by itself.

Page 5: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

uncl unclear; also vague, unspecific

(words permit several

interpretations) Examples:

Children are strongly influenced by their parents’ alcoholism.

This also tells us how he felt.

Sanders compares his hammer to classics such as Gregorian chants and Don Quixote.

Page 6: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

...so where’s the problem?

Children are strongly influenced by their parents’ alcoholism.

What does this sentence tell you? Do the children like their parents’ drinking?Are they worried?Are they embarrassed?

Page 7: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: replace abstract or general words with more concrete ones

Children are emotionally crippled by their parents’ alcoholism.

Children are strongly influenced by their parents’ alcoholism.

Page 8: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

...so where’s the problem?

This also tells us how he felt.

How does he feel? Does he like his father? Is he jealous of his father? And what is “this” that tells us so much?

Page 9: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: replace abstract or general words with more concrete ones.

This story also tells us that he loved his father.

This also tells us how

he felt.

Page 10: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

...so where’s the problem?

Sanders compares his hammer to classics such as Gregorian chants and Don Quixote.

What qualities are being compared?What IS the comparison?Does his hammer sing a tune? Does it fight with windmills?

Page 11: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: replace abstract or general words with more concrete ones

Like classics such as Gregorian chants and Don Quixote, Sanders’ hammer embodies the values and traditions of earlier generations.

Sanders compares his hammer to classics such as Gregorian chants and Don Quixote.

Page 12: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

ref unclear referent (the word a pronoun refers to—its “antecedent”--is ambiguous or not given)

Problem:

Jerry and his grandfather took his friend to the lake to go fishing.

Page 13: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

So who did Jerry’s grandfather take fishing, anyway?

Jerry and his grandfather took his friend to the lake to go fishing.

Page 14: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: replace the pronounwith a specific reference.

Jerry’s grandfather took his grandson and his old war buddy fishing.

Page 15: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Jerry’s grandfather took the two boys fishing.

Solution: replace the pronounwith a specific reference.

Page 16: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Jerry and his grandfather

took Fred fishing.

Solution: replace the pronounwith a specific reference.

Page 17: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Jerry and his friend Fred went fishing with Jerry’s grandfather.

Solution: replace the pronounwith a specific reference.

Page 18: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

wc word choice (word does not mean

what the writer intends)

This way

Examples:

Parents do their best to give their children positive incite.

People that work hard often succeed.

The dog growled when he took away it’s bone.

There should be a bondage between father and son.

No, that way

oops, this way

Page 19: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: find the right word

Parents do their best to give their children positive incite.

Parents do their best to give their children positive motivation.

OR

Parents do their best to give their children positive insight.

Page 20: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: find the right word

People that work hard often succeed.

People who work hard often succeed.

Page 21: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: find the right word

The dog growled when he took away it’s bone.

The dog growled when he took away its bone.

Page 22: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: find the right word

There should be a bondage between father and son.

There should be a bond between father and son.

Page 23: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

agr agreement (a noun and its verb, or a pronoun and its antecedent

do not agree)

1 1 3 Examples:

Six out of the ten were all-conference, and two out of the ten was all-state.

All women have a right to her own opinion.

Page 24: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

Solution: change one of the words so that they agree

Six out of the ten were all-conference, and two out of the ten was all-state.

Six out of the

ten were all-

conference,

and two out of

the ten were

all-state.

Page 25: Oh, boy! More typos! word errors  awkward phrasing  unclear wording  word choice  unclear referent  agreement  usage/idiom

All women have a right to her own opinion.

Every woman has a right to her own opinion.

OR

All women have a right to their own opinions.

Solution: change one of the words so that they agree