© 2020 HUMBLE WARRIOR WOMEN STAY-AT-HOME SOBER GUIDE 1

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The current stay-at-home mandates place our recovery in need of extra support. This comprehensive guide provides the following: 1) 7 Stay-at-Home Sober Strategies, 2) Tips for Tackling Cravings, 3) Guidelines on Communication, 4) a Sober AID Kit, 5) the I AM Energy Clearing guided meditation, and 6) a daily Vitality Tracker to anchor your recovery journey. Stay-at-Home Sober!

2 CRYSTALLIZE YOUR PURPOSE Create a personal mission statement for your recovery. • What do you want to create? Describe it. Begin with "I want to live a sober life..." • Why do you want to be sober? Get personal. • What will being sober bring to you, your family, and your life? Describe expected benefits. • What do you need to do to stay sober? Describe key actions. • Seal the deal: finish with a commitment statement. Example: I want to live a sober life so that I am in control of my mind and actions. Being 100% alcohol-free allows me to be an authentic person, a great mother, a loving wife, and a successful professional woman. When I am sober, my family and friends feel comfortable, happy, and secure, because everybody is able to relax and be themselves. To maintain my sustained recovery, I need to attend daily AA meetings, live by the 12 steps, call my sponsor, ask for help when needed, and above all, do everything possible and implement every system I know in order to stay sober. I pledge to myself to live sober one day at a time because I want renewed purpose, health, and vitality to create limitless possibilities in my life.

Once your mission statement is complete, display it in key places.

• Set your intentions with your recovery plans and be clear with everyone in the house. • Set boundaries with what’s ok and what’s not ok, calmly. • Establish guidelines or house rules. If applicable, get the kids involved and hold them

accountable. Re-evaluate at least weekly via a family meeting to fine tune so things run smoothly. • Create a checklist for kids' or other adults' chores/responsibilities and put it on the kitchen

refrigerator to get everybody invested in a well functioning household. Praise whenever possible for a job well done!

• Request no drinking alcohol in the house, or only in certain areas or at certain times with your agreement. In other words, in light of your need for a safe sober place, mutually agree to areas that another adult could have an alcoholic beverage. Show gratitude for support you receive.

• Practice equanimity in all conversations. (See Guidelines on Communication on page 4.)

ORGANIZE HOUSEHOLD AROUND YOUR RECOVERY No matter what, your recovery must come first!

© 2020 HUMBLE WARRIOR WOMEN STAY-AT-HOME SOBER GUIDE 2

3 PLAN YOUR RECOVERY LIKE A GPS SYSTEM Establish detailed daily routines.

4 EXPAND YOUR CONNECTION CHANNELS Maintain community and communications as much as possible. • Reach out to sober friends or supportive friends regularly. • Attend at least 1 recovery meeting per day (online is

great!). • Join online virtual recovery groups, such as Recovery 2.0. • Participate on social media sober and recovery sites. When

you help another, you help yourself! • Call your sponsor daily. • Get a free Zoom account; use with extended family, HS or

college friends, old neighbors, etc. • Enjoy walks with neighbors (practice social distancing). • Call or email friends you haven’t talked with in a while.

5 PRACTICE EMOTIONAL SUPPORT Establish practices to help ignite or calm yourself.

Spirit-lifting practices: • Daily self-affirmations: I AM... statements, e.g., I AM

STRONG, I AM A GREAT MOTHER, I AM SOBER • Dancing (in the house, or even “dancing in the dark”!:)) • Movement: yoga, walking, jogging, cardio • 30-minute, at-home strength workout (search online or on

FB) • Singing • Laughing • Creativity: enriching podcasts, webinars, books, etc.

TIPS FOR TACKLING CRAVINGS, TRIGGERS, AND OTHER STRESSORS Impose a minimum 15-minute cooling-off period. Walk away.

Find a hobby you love, such as cooking, painting, reading, or dancing.

Drink a large glass of electrolyte or peppermint oil water, and/or brush your teeth.

Take a cold shower or place an ice cube in each palm of your hands and squeeze.

Get outside in the sun, go barefoot in the grass, and take a walk in nature.

Do your favorite form of exercise or any movement. Get energy flowing. Meditate and do some gratitude journaling, tai chi, qi gong, and yoga.

Take a bath with Epsom salt (it has calming magnesium).

Diffuse calming essential oils such as lavender, ylang ylang, bergamot, marjoram, frankincense, and geranium.

Watch a funny or uplifting video and movie.

Spend time with positive social relations (including pets!).

• Organize your routine into a daily tracker (see Vitality Tracker template on page 6).

• Prioritize your morning routine: include brief meditation, planning, yoga, or an early online AA* meeting.

• Commit to an evening routine: include reading, journaling, and gratitude.

• Eat meals on schedule, if not early. Include healthy snacks. Stay satisfied with healthy food.

• Implement a strong set of systems when triggered using: a) the Tips for Tackling Cravings, Triggers, and Other Stressors, and b) the Sober Aid Kit on page 4.

*If AA is not in your routine (for any reason), give it another try. Your recovery is more important than harboring a bad experience in the past or an ideological issue with AA. Be open to new possibilities.

© 2020 HUMBLE WARRIOR WOMEN STAY-AT-HOME SOBER GUIDE 3

6 PRIORITIZE HEALING AND SELF-CARE Focus on nurturing and nourishing your body, mind, and spirit.

• Have an established routine of waking and bedtime that follows the sun. • Do the same things (awaken, eat, work, exercise, relax) every day around the same times to

strengthen the nervous system and improve your energy.  • Schedule movement in your day (e.g., online yoga classes) to move your energy. • Be outside in the sun when possible. A minimum of 30 minutes per day, preferably early in the

morning. • Go barefoot in the grass. • Drink lots of clean (filtered) water. • Eat clean, primarily plant-based food, including healthy fats and proteins. • Limit sugar intake (remember carbs convert to sugar, so minimize intake). • Drink lemon in hot water for a detox boost. • Include anything that supports your positive state of mind, such as a favorite crystal, blooming

flowers, a tidy and clean house, a cup of coffee or tea on the porch, etc. • Recite daily mantras: “I will not worry about what I cannot control.” “I choose to leave guilt in

the past.” “I am grateful I am sober.” “Stay sober one day at a time.” 

7 SCHEDULE TIME FOR JOY Schedule time for FUN in your day! • Have fun in your house! • Music  • Board games • Card games • Puzzles • Movies: comedy and action • Stand-up comedy routines • Baking and other fun kitchen projects • Arts and crafts projects  • Vision board • Intimacy

Spirit-calming practices: • Short meditations of sitting and being still (2–5 minutes) • Guided meditations (see page 5) • Breathwork: 5 minutes of deep breathing with exhale longer

than inhale, or Breath of Fire • Gratitude practices: journaling, mental awareness, sharing

your thoughts of gratitude with others • Epsom salt baths • Practice forgiveness: mentally or verbally forgive, journal your

thoughts • Trust in yourself

© 2020 HUMBLE WARRIOR WOMEN STAY-AT-HOME SOBER GUIDE 4

HUMBLE WARRIOR WOMEN SOBER AID KIT

What do you WANT vs. what do you WANT MORE? Since the #1 thing we need to do in recovery is to WANT to stay sober, CHOOSING this handy exercise can be a game-changer. Use a large index card or stock paper. On one side, tape a meaningful photo (family, partner, yourself, scenery). On the other side, list all the reasons why you want to be sober more than want to be drinking. Be specific! Get personal! Brainstorm until the card is full and reread everyday. 

Your Sober Connection: On an index card, have names and numbers of people to call when you need support. (Note: even if they are in your cell phone, write them out.)

Decorate with your WHY: All over your house, place meaningful photos of family, kids, spouses, partners, favorite places, etc. in key areas to remind you of WHY you want to live a sober life. Prioritize photos in which you are sober.   The Humble Warrior Women Rescue Card: On one side of an index card write about the inevitable sh*tshow story of what usually happens when you begin drinking, including how others will feel, how others are impacted, and how you’ll feel the next morning physically, emotionally, and mentally. On the other side, write about how you overcame an urge to drink and the likely success story of what usually happens when you hold onto your sobriety, including how others will feel, how others are impacted, and how you’ll feel the next morning physically, emotionally, and mentally. Keep The Humble Warrior Women Rescue Card in your car, your purse, by your computer, in your bedroom, and all key places. Have the success story visible.

Guidelines on Communications: 1. STAY CALM: Find a good time to talk calmly about issues, focusing on being non-emotional and non-reactive and avoiding being drawn into drama or anger. Practice equanimity (state of balance or non-attachment to an emotion or outcome). 2. USE ACTIVE LISTENING: Understand each other’s perspective as clearly as possible without judgement. Listen without interrupting; empathize and understand all positions. Paraphrase back what you each heard to be crystal clear on the issues and avoid any misunderstandings.

3. CHOOSE WORDS CAREFULLY: Be mindful of all words used. Agree to regroup and take a breather if necessary, rather than speaking without a clear, calm mind. Agree to table a conversation until another day for any reason but especially if someone is triggered.

4. CORRECT THE ISSUES (NOT THE PERSON): Express what you need rather than finding fault with the other person. (The situation needs to be changed, but the other person is not faulty.) Also, avoid judgement-based statements such as, “You make me feel,” but instead state, “When this happens, I feel….” 

5. AIM FOR A WIN-WIN OUTCOME: Try to end all discussions with a win-win for both parties. Everyone should find value in the outcome. Be sure to speak clearly about what it is you appreciate about your partner. Practice forgiveness for the behaviors.

Guided

© 2020 HUMBLE WARRIOR WOMEN STAY-AT-HOME SOBER GUIDE 5

With great honor and joy, I’m thrilled to share with you an excellent guided meditation, I AM Energy Clearing, written and narrated by one of my favorite transformational life coaches, Stephanie Barton. I attended Stephanie’s Energy Clearing live workshop in 2014 during the tough years of my active alcohol addiction, and I used this meditation consistently from that point through my early recovery.

The meditation flows through the 7 chakra centers, using positive affirmations by completing the sentence, “I AM…” With room for only love, compassion, and non-judgement, this meditation brings all persons back to their divine selves. Since addiction hijacks our nervous system, clearing our energy centers, or chakras (which line the spine beginning at the sacrum and ascending up through the top of the head), is the most efficient way to balance, purify, and reignite our energetic fields.

The meditation concludes with releasing all negativity gripping us, whether words, people, or memories, and replacing it with the energy of light and love. When you listen to the meditation, please get out of your mind and into your heart. The heart is a more powerful manifester than the mind. Don’t just think the words; you need to FEEL the words, and this meditation gives you many of them to feel! Enjoy, humble warrior women!

Click to access the guided meditation audio.

(Reference: Barton, Stephanie. I AM Energy Clearing. 2010. Stephanie is kindly offering her companion book for the guided meditation audio. Click here for the book.)

MEDITATION for Energetic Vitality (for attached audio)

© 2020 HUMBLE WARRIOR WOMEN STAY-AT-HOME SOBER GUIDE 6

Vitality TrackerSun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat

Vital Nutrition

Aim to eat between 7 am and 7 pm

Water intake minimum 64 oz

Clean, whole, real food (plants)

Healthy snacks

Green juices

No/limited added sugar intake

Vital Supplements/Medications

Morning meds/supplements

Immune booster (include antioxidants)

Liver support (e.g., hot lemon water)

Multivitamin/vitamin B complex

Electrolytes

Omegas

Probiotic/apple cider vinegar

Evening medicine/supplements

Vital Mind/Body/Spirit

Morning meditation/routine

Sunshine minimun 30 minutes

Family time

Yoga or other strength

Walk or other cardio

Joyful activities

Meditation/breathwork

Enrichment (reading, podcasts)

Bedtime routine (journal, gratitude)

Vital Recovery

Morning Surrender

Meetings

Connections

Social media sober groups

Evening gratitude/journaling

Download an editable version of the Vitality Tracker here.

© 2020 HUMBLE WARRIOR WOMEN STAY-AT-HOME SOBER GUIDE 7

Humble Warrior Women is devoted to supporting women in early recovery from alcohol use disorder who are seeking renewed purpose, health, and vitality to create limitless possibilities in their lives.

Humble Warrior Women is a coaching program for women with or without experience in other recovery programs, and it can be considered a complement to ongoing programs such as the 12-step programs. Our unique program is a 24-week, online, holistic wellness and recovery course focusing on your recovery, your healing, and a sustainable way of living a happy, sober life. Both group and individual coaching are included along with weekly self-study (followed by an online review), bio-energetic scans, energy support, a collaborative community, and unlimited support.

Protect your hard-fought sobriety. Take the next step in securing your recovery with a program using proven strategies and a caring community to support you on your way to transformation.

If you would like to schedule time to discuss your recovery needs, please feel free to book a complementary discovery call.

Jill Rathburn, RN Certified Professional Recovery Coach

435-729-0996 jill@humblewarriorwomen.com

humblewarriorwomen.com

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