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Parent Workshop 1 - Induction Pathways Health and Research Centre www.pathwayshrc.com.au Author: Professor Paula Barrett Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 (Fun Friends) Slide 2 How the program works There are four developmentally sensitive, evidence based versions of the program: 10/12 sessions 2 parent sessions Home Activities to generalise skills Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Fun FRIENDSEarly Childhood4-7 years FRIENDS for LifePrimary School8-11 years My FRIENDS YouthUpper Primary Middle Secondary 12-15 years RESILIENCE for LifeUpper Secondary to adult 16 years onwards Slide 3 Agenda Provide an overview of anxiety and resilience in childhood and adolescence Provide information about the FRIENDS program Questions Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 4 Emotional distress is... Cognitive/Thinking Worry, negative thoughts, poor concentration, attentional biases.Physiological/Body Increased heart rate, muscle tension, perspiration, stomach aches, sleep difficulties, agitation.Behavioural/Actions Flight (escape or avoidant behaviours) Fight (aggressive behaviours) Reassurance seeking Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 5 All children experience anxiety as part of their normal development. 0 - 5 MonthsLoss of support, loud noises 7 - 12 MonthsFear of strangers, fear of the unexpected 1 YearsSeparation from main attachment figures, toileting and injury fears 2 - 6 YearsMany fears: loud noises, animals, darkness, separation, life changes, strangers, Injury, monsters 7 8 YearsSupernatural beings, dark, media events, left alone, injury 9 - 12 YearsTest and exams, school performance, bodily injury, physical appearance, thunder and lightning, death, the dark (low percentage) AdolescentsSchool, home, safety, political issues, personal relationships, personal appearance, natural phenomena, uncertainty/future, animals Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Varies across cultures Slide 6 If a child or an adult worries what are the signs of excessive worry? Worry (anticipatory) Avoidance Attention to threat/ hyper vigilance Fast and sustained physiological arousal Psychosomatic complaints Difficulty in resting and going to sleep Shyness Social withdrawal Perfectionism Appetite changes NB: Will vary across culture and individuals Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 7 they have a significant impact on your life they are beyond developmental appropriateness they cause significant distress they have been present for long periods they cause significant interference Emotions become challenging when Barriers that prevent us from thinking in helpful ways and paying attention to positive things around us. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 8 Factors associated with a vulnerability for one to experience severe emotional distress throughout Temperament - Sensitivity/low thresholds for stress Traumatic experiences Developmental challenges Risk Factors Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 9 Scientific proven resilience skills Attachment/Affection How we pay attention Positive thinking style Support networks (extended family, community and friendships) Health factors (sleep, daily physical activity, healthy eating) Skills taught in evidenced based prevention programs (FRIENDS programs) Protective Factors Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 10 Some of the important gifts you can give your children Unconditional love/Positive, stable attachment Paying attention to the positives Positive thinking style Time to be children/unstructured, creative, outdoor, active play Resilience skills Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 11 What is emotional wellbeing? Being attentive to your surroundings Being aware of what is in the here and now Being aware of and enjoying all of your senses Paying attention to what you see, hear, smell, feel and taste and accepting it Being non-judgemental It just is Mindfulness Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 12 Resilience Resilience Resilience = to spring back, or rebound Oxford Dictionary Ability to overcome adversity; achieving good outcomes regardless of life events or circumstances. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 13 Emotional and Social Skills necessary for resilience Self regulation Self soothing Empathy Friendship skills Self and Social awareness Ability to form and maintain positive and stable attachments Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 14 Childhood Challenges Trying and learning new things Managing feelings & meltdowns Knowing triggers (if any) Making friends Handling bullying Fitting into the family and school environment Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 15 Children who are emotionally and socially skilled are more successful at school (Durlak et al., 2011) Benefits of Resilience Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 16 Social Competence social competence Academic performance in grade 8 could be better predicted from knowing childrens social competence 5 years earlier than from primary school academic results. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 17 Specific Skills and Techniques Taught Behavioural/Social Problem solvingStep Plans Support/Role Models Cognitive AttentionSelf-talkChallenging Relaxation BreathingMusclesVisualisation Feelings (ourselves & others) NormalisationBeing Brave Body Clues Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 18 ATTACHMENT Theoretical Model of Anxiety/Depression Prevention and Resilience Building Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 19 ATTACHMENT Attachment is the number one predictor of positive wellbeing Attachment is the number one predictor of positive wellbeing (the first few years of life are the most crucial) Unconditional love is the most important thing regardless of intelligence, financial resources, environment etc. Use attachment skills as often as possible in daily interactions 1.Physical and psychological connection 2.Facial expressions 3.Feelings of security are circular 4.Differentiate between unconditional love and the behaviour of your loved one 5.Praise children for trying their best, not just for outcomes Copyright entire contents Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 (Stable Life-long Attachment) Slide 20 ATTACHMENT Tools: Understanding Feelings Emotional Self-regulation Self-soothing ability Empathy Skills Circle of Support Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 21 LEARNING Tools: Problem Solving Skills/ Coping skills Gradual Step Plans to Achieve Goals Identification of Positive Role Models Peer Support Benefits of Giving To Others (Altruism and Compassion) Interpersonal Rewards Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 22 MIND Tools: Awareness of Self-talk Choosing Helpful Self-talk and Thinking Changing Unhelpful Thinking to Helpful Thinking Expecting Good Things to Happen Understanding of Feelings-Thoughts-Behaviour Interactions Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 23 BODY Tools: Becoming friends with your body Deep Breathing Exercises Relaxation Activities Mindfulness Self-awareness Health factors Having fun and enjoying life Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 24 In The Friends programs The FRIENDS program is about working in small groups, sharing, role plays, fun, creativity, normalisation and mutual support The FRIENDS program is not about reading and writing and individual work Reflective work is to be done at home Each individuals workbook is important for reflection and rehearsal of skills outside of group sessions Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 25 Important to know Self-Awareness: getting to know yourself, your patterns, your sensitivities, will help with self regulation Changing Habits: it takes time to change psychological and physical habits usually 2-3 months Reciprocal Skills: all skills need to be practiced by all family members (top down + bottom up through the system) Modelling Skills: FRIENDS program facilitators model to group participants, children model to each other, children model to their parents Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 26 What are your expectations? Realistic expectations about long term change Responsibilities: Child: trying to learn and use new skills Adult: learn new skills for themselves and for the child, model these skills to children, helping to generalise skills to life situations, praise (little and big) positive changes, make an effort to notice small positive changes Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 27 How can you help? Families and caregivers play a vital role in the development and maintenance of the skills taught in the FRIENDS program. Each week your child will be introduced to specific skills to help build their resiliency. These skills need to be reinforced both during the group and in the home environment in order for change to occur. We strongly encourage adults to do the adult resilience programs which will help understand resilience skills and help when practising with children Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 28 How to Prepare children and adults for doing the friends programs Explain the concept of resilience. This program will give everyone resilience skills that will help them be the best they can be throughout their lives and face challenges in a positive, confident way Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 29 Overview of Content Overview of Content Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 30 Why do we use the word FRIENDS? Because: Our body is our friend We need to be a good friend to ourselves We can make friends Talking to our friends is important FRIENDS is an acronym for the skills and strategies taught in the program For Life: We need to use these skills throughout the rest of our lives when faced with challenges Because: Our body is our friend We need to be a good friend to ourselves We can make friends Talking to our friends is important FRIENDS is an acronym for the skills and strategies taught in the program For Life: We need to use these skills throughout the rest of our lives when faced with challenges Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 31 F Feelings. R Remember to Relax. Have quiet time. I I can do it! I can try my best! E Explore Solutions and Coping Step Plans. N Now reward yourself! Youve done your best! D Dont forget to practise. S Smile! Stay calm and talk to your support networks! The FRIENDS acronym Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 32 F = FEELINGS Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Talk about feelings Talk about other peoples feelings The FRIENDS program helps children to learn to identify when they are feeling worried or nervous or angry by recognising their own individual body clues, which prompt them to calm down and relax and choose thumbs up ideas for coping. Learning to understand and regulate our own feelings and learn empathy for others feelings Working on feeling happy, brave and confident Slide 33 Tips for Families: Try to verbalise what you think your child is feeling. Validate your childs feelings before problem solving as a way of letting your child know that you understand how they are feeling. Talking about feelings helps to communicate to children that all feelings are ok, however; it is what we choose to do with our feelings that counts (thumbs up, thumbs down behaviours). Identify and discuss the strengths of each family member. Becoming aware of strengths will enhance and boost individual and family confidence. F = FEELINGS Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 34 R = RELAX This step teaches children to learn and practise a variety of relaxation techniques. Why? We find it hard to think straight if we are not calm Milkshake Breathing - Slow deep breathing Breathing slowly helps us relax our body, our heart beat slows down and we feel less tense and worried Muscle Relaxation When we tense and relax our muscles our body releases happy chemicals (endorphins) which makes us feel relaxedVisualisation Imagining a peaceful, happy relaxing place can help us to feel calm Quiet Time Activities that make yourself feel happy and relaxed Fun activities with the family is a way of relaxing and feeling good Fun activities with the family is a way of relaxing and feeling good Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 35 Tips for Families: Encourage your child to verbalise what is happening inside of their bodies when they experience a variety of emotions. Once children are aware of their body clues, they need to do something about this. Encourage child to practise relaxation strategies Practice / allocate quiet time each day Encourage and practise breathing Develop family relaxation menu of feel-good activities N.B. Being really angry might need some active calming down strategies like running or jumping on the trampoline to get the energy out! R = RELAX Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 36 I = I can try! (helpful thoughts) This step teaches children to tune into their self-talk. This is an important skill as thoughts influence feelings and behaviour. There are two main steps: 1.Awareness of red thoughts (negative self-talk) 2.Replacing with green thoughts (positive self-talk). Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 37 Red THOUGHTS vs. Green (POWERFUL) THOUGHTS Im dumb Im ok at lots of things I give up If I try Ill get better. I hate my sister/ brother I find my brother/ sister annoying sometimes, but other times they are fun to play with I have no friends I have 2 people I play with and my dog is my friend Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 38 Tips for Families: Encourage your child to pay attention to positive things in themselves, in other people and the world. Help your children to see to see the glass as half-full rather than half empty. This takes time and practice! Help your child become aware of their self-talk and assist them in turning negative thoughts into positive and powerful thoughts. Help your child practice bossing back unhelpful thoughts and replacing them with more positive thoughts. Notice negative thinking in yourself or your child. Young people model what they see and hear around them. If you recognise that you are saying unhelpful words or feeling tense or nervous then let your child know that you are aware of this. Then demonstrate coming up with an alternative positive way of looking at your situation. I = I can try! (helpful thoughts) Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 39 E = Encourage How to be a good friend This session teaches children friendship skills and how to be brave by talking small steps towards something we find tricky or scary. Improve friendship skills through role plays (or with puppets for young children) Look people in the eye Listen Smile Share Take turns Help Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 40 E = Encourage STEP PLANS COPING STEP PLANS The step plan involves breaking down a challenging situation into small, achievable, easy steps. The steps gradually become more difficult until the fear is overcome. Children need to use the FRIENDS plan (deep breaths, green thoughts) as they climb each step. Children cannot go the next step until they feel calm and relaxed on the current step. This session teaches children how to be brave by taking small steps towards something we find tricky or scary. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 41 Pathways Health & Research Centre 88 Boundary Street West End Qld 4010 www.pathwayshrc.com.au Coping Step Plans Goals could relate to: Overcoming a fear Preparing for an upcoming event Learning a new skill Trying something new Completing a task Achieving a goal Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 42 Example: Fear of Dogs Facing Our Fears Climbing the Steps 8. Patting the dog 7. Letting the dog sniff her/him. 6. Standing close to a small dog on a leash 5. Standing a distance from a small dog on a leash 4. Looking at a small dog behind glass 3. Looking at a small dog from a safe distance 2. Looking at/touching a photograph of a dog 1. Reading a story about a friendly dog Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 43 7. Eats new food regularly 6. Tries a little more another night 5. Takes one or two bites of his / her own 4. Has a little on his / her plate at dinner 3. Takes one or two bites of Mum / Dads 2. Tries new food mixed in with other familiar food or as part of a pie / casserole 1. Touches & smells new food Coping step plan Example: Learning to eat new foods Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 44 Example: Going to pre-school & separating from mum Coping step plan 7. Hug, smile and wave goodbye to Mum. 6. Green thoughts: Mum will be back to pick me up later and I can have fun playing with my new friends until then! 5. Mum walks to class and stays for a few minutes 4. Get everything ready for school. School bag, school clothes 3. Visit the school when there is no one around 2. Talk to friends and family about the fun things you do at school 1. Read a story about school with mum Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 45 Step 1 Step 2 Step 3 Step 4 Step 5 Step 6: GOAL Helpful thoughts Rewards Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 46 Tips for Families: Encourage your child to tell you something challenging. Give your child descriptive praise when they try their best. Help your child to practise saying GREEN thoughts when faced with new situations or challenges. Share your own experiences when facing challenges. Break skills and activities into small steps. Dont expect your child to progress to the next level until they have mastered the level below and feel confident. STEP PLANS Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 47 REWARDS EXAMPLES OF REWARDS Spending time doing their favourite activity together Spending fun, relaxing time with friends and family Cooking a special, healthy meal together Going to a natural place (beach, park) for a picnic Relaxation time together Celebrating the special little things in life Encourage rewarding yourself with non material rewards. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 48 REWARDS Tips for Families: Teach children to reward themselves when they try hard. Rewards need to be given straight after the effort. Trying is more important than outcome. Focus on what children (can do) first. Then help them to try and have a go at what they find challenging. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 49 N = Nurture Tips for families: Identify the people whom you look up to in your life both now or in the past. Identify their strengths discuss with your child (ren) the ways in which these people have impacted your life. Have a family discussion as to the sources of supports available to you. For example, family, friends, community leaders, teachers, family GP, sports coach, music or dance teacher etc. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 50 D = Dont forget to be Brave Tips for Families: Try to incorporate the FRIENDS language into everyday life. Continue to challenge unhelpful thoughts (RED thoughts) and turn them into helpful thoughts (GREEN thoughts). Discuss situations where a coping step plan may be useful (e.g., going to school, making friends, learning to ride a bike). Continue to help your child generate personal ways to reward themselves for their efforts. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 51 S = Stay happy Skill Practice Sessions Tips for Families: Help your child to identify future challenges (e.g., beginning a new school) and to set realistic goals for now and the future (e.g., learning to swim or attend school camp). Keep practicing the FRIENDS skills each day to help your child (ren) manage current and future challenges. Daily practice of the FRIENDS skills will help maintain positive changes. However, setbacks may occur from time-to-time, this is to be expected. Dont despair! The FRIENDS skills are skills to be used in real-life situations both now and for the rest of your lives. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 52 What to expect Talking about feelings increased family communication, learning a new language, empowers parents More empathy towards others (people, animals and nature) Being braver trying new situations, approach behaviours Calmer, more positive thinking Once we introduce step plans can deal directly with challenging situations Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 53 Are there any questions about the program? Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 54 COPYRIGHT, INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY AND TRADEMARK, LEGAL ISSUES The information in these power point slides can not be replicated, used, nor presented in any other manner without written permission from the author. Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012 Slide 55 THANK YOU! Pathways Health and Research Centre www.pathwayshrc.com.au Email: info@pathwayshrc.com.auinfo@pathwayshrc.com.au Copyright Dr. Paula Barrett 2012