Parental Substance misuse-What children tell us

Background Children's experiences Children's feelings Coping Strategies Support needs What children say they want Implications

Background

Knowledge of children’s experiences of parental problem substance misuse comes generally from statistics

poor outcomes-vulnerable children Services traditionally focussed on the

needs of adults Large numbers of children affected: 4-6 million potentially in England of parents

with problem alcohol use and 2- 3 % of children in England have parents

with problem drug use.

Sources of knowledge

Until recently very little research undertaken with these children.

‘Hidden Harm’-report of inquiry by advisory council on misuse of drugs, 2003

‘Understanding what children say’ Literature review NCB, with NSPCC and Joseph Rowntree, Sarah Gorin, 2004

‘Children Speak’ -Butler and Williamson, NSPCC, 1994

Children's experiences

Discovering parents problems.Parents try to conceal drug taking from children but often unsuccessfully.‘I walked in on them once when I was a wee boy and I saw them [mum and uncle]taking stuff..and other people that were in the house taking it…That’s the first time I caught them and they just…they started doing it in front of me, didnae hide it then’ [Barnard and Barlow, 2003]

Children’s experiences

Children report: witnessing inconsistent

behaviour-’moanie’ ‘slow’ sleepy’ Seeing paraphanelia and strangers

coming into the house Witnessing drug taking Witnessing other criminal

behaviours e.g shoplifting

Children's experiences

Chaotic lifestyles: ‘sometimes we are late for school and don’t have any breakfast’ [Liverpool DAAT,2001:18]

Increased caring responsibilities:‘I’d be left with Ian…and I had to take care of him…but she didn’t really know.She’d come round for a while and wake up ….but then she’d go and take more stuff and she’d be sort of out of it and she couldn’t even blooming boil a kettle..to make his milk’[Barnard and Barlow, 2003]

Children’s experiences

Effects on Education : ‘I skip school because of my mum I’ve done it a few times because I’m worried about her’[Dearden and Becker 1996:15]

Effects on Friendships: ‘Other parents warn their kids to keep away from them because their parents were smack heads…they would be isolated’[Liverpool DAT, 2001;20]

Children’s feelings

Fear and anxiety :’I feel sad like I shouldn’t be living’[Houston and others 1997:26]

Anger: ‘A girl at a school called mum a slag and a drunk and I hit her a broke her nose’[Houston and Others 1997:37]

Guilt shame and stigma:’Like they didnae care for me, other folk would be like, ‘I’m doing this with my mum and dad the night’ ..and I’d be saying ..’Oh aye so am I’…but they’d be away using or something”[‘Barnard and Barlow, 2003]

Coping strategies

Children have strong views and feelings about what is happening within their families[Laybourn and others,1996 in

Gorin 2003]

Children use a variety of coping strategies

Different children within the same family will cope in different ways

Coping strategies

Avoidance /distraction,’Don’t talk to anyone –just go off in a mood or watch TV.They wouldn’t listen.Don’t need anyone[Butler and Williamson.1994:70]

Protection ,’Yes that’s what I do –I lie awake at night .I still do.I make myself be awake so that I can jump up when its happening and get between them …..Usually it helps because I get between them and cry and try to stop them.[Mullender and others 2002]

Coping Strategies

Inaction‘I preferred that cos that way I never saw much. I just stayed up all night watching telly’[Barnard and Barlow 2003]

Confrontation, ‘I hate the bastard. He comes in drunk and hits me and my sister for no reason.He’s not the same person.I would like to hire an axe murderer and kill him’[Houston and others 1997]

Support Needs

Help seeking, ‘’Instead of saying ’you have to do this’ say ’why don’t you try this and if you don’t like it don’t bother’.People who look at things from your point of view, who take time to find out what you’re thinking is best for you’.

‘I want my own choices otherwise my life might be ruined by someone else's mistakes’.

‘ I’d talk to Miss---she’s got her head screwed on.She’s caring and she’d be confidential about it’

‘I suppose they care about you but they make a fuss and go over the top .Sometimes you only want to talk’ [Butler and Williamson 1994]

What children say they want

Drop in centres Fun activity groups A general family service An anonymous help line Educational initiatives Befriending Individual counselling Group work Family mediation Out of hours crisis services

Implications

Need to enable children to understand problems at home

Enable children to access help Respecting children recognising and

valuing their experience and acting on concerns appropriately

Providing an appropriate range of support‘The voices of children of problem drug users should be heard and listened to’[Hidden Harm 2004].