parenting children with special needs
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PARENTING CHILDREN WITH SPECIAL NEEDS
Success of a program demands an effective Partnership between the professionals and the parents.
Knowledgeable and skillful parenting is the most effective and economical means for fostering the optimum development of the child
STAGES OF PARENTAL REACTIONS
• SHOCK, DISBELIEF AND DENIAL• ANGER AND RESENTMENT• BARGAINING• DEPRESSION AND
DISCOURAGEMENT• ACCEPTANCE
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A FATHER’S PERSPECTIVE
EGOSINVOLVE OR WITHDRAW?
ORIENTATION
Father :What is that above my head? Can you do me a favor, please CLICK ME!!!!
METHODS OF PARENT INVOLVEMENT
HOME – BASED TEACHING
OBSERVATION – HOME AND SCHOOL
PARENT PARTICIPATION – VOLUNTEER IN CLASS ACTIVITIES, FIELD TRIPS
PASSPORTS – MAKING REGULAR NOTATIONS
ATTENDING INDIVIDUAL PARENT – TEACHER CONFERENCES
PARENTING CLASSES – GIVE OR TAKE
PARENT SUPPORT GROUP PROGRAMS
ADVOCACY – NEWSLETTERS, ACTIVITIES, INTERVIEWS, MEDIA, ETC.
INTERVENTION GUIIDELINESFOR PARENTS
Be ready to praiseFor the child’s efforts and successes; hugs, smiles, prizes, positive words
Correct with careShow or tell a preferred response
Find an appropriate time and place for doing activities
do not remove the child from an activity he or she is involved in; be certain that the child is attentive, not hungry, sleepy, hyperactive or tired
INTERVENTION GUIDELINES FOR PARENTS
Do not use force i f t h e c h i l d s e e s y o u a n g r y, te n s e , o r c r i ti c a l h e
o r s h e w i l l d i s l i ke t h e a c ti v i ti e s Be flexib le
va r y a c ti v i ti e s a n d t e c h n i q u e sSpeak c lear ly
u s e n o r m a l v o i c eBe prepared with activities you can do with your ch i ld Be enthus iastic
“Love the Lord your God with all
Your heart and with all
Your soul and with all mind”
( Matthew 22:37 – 38)
THE END
REACTION SYMPTOMS & BEHAVIOR
HOW TEACHERS HELP
Shock, Disbelief
and denial
• May be accompanied by feelings of shame, guilt, and unworthiness
• May deny the existence of the problem
• Physician hopping• Some parents may refuse to seek
guidance
• Help parents understand that feelings such as shame or guilt are normal but should be felt temporarily
• Teachers should listen with acceptance
• Help parents focus on ways they can work in behalf of the child
• Know that anxiety creates problems• Minimize grieving time
Anger and Resentment
• When parents can no longer deny their child’s condition
• They may intellectually accept the child’s problems but cannot focus on positive resources
• May direct anger at professionals• Suspicion about teacher’s
motives – others may want to prove her wrong
• Verbal abuse is common
• they need to be understanding, compassionate and caring
• Getting parents busy – give them tasks to do with their children
• Constantly remind parents that they can make a difference to their children
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REACTION SYMPTOMS & BEHAVIOR HOW TEACHERS HELP
BARGAINING • Resembles an attempt to postpone complete intellectual and emotional acceptance
• Parents work with great diligence and determination – assuming that the problem will go away
• If progress is not rapid or expected, bargaining is followed by depression
• Must display emphatic understanding by recognizing and accepting natural feelings of the parents
• Help parent accept feelings as normal
DEPRESSION AND
DISCOURAGEMENT
• An oppressive weight of hopelessness can add new dimension to the problems
• Feelings of helplessness - they may be more likely to ask for assistance
• Mourning – saying goodbye to the disappearing image of one’s “missing child” normal child
• Beginning of acceptance and focusing on productive solutions to their problems
• focus on the positive – avoid adding to parent’s depression
• Lessons must be planned to ensure success
• Avoid direct and indirect criticism – erase parents’ self – doubt
• Avoid giving excessive, unwanted praise because parents interpret it as insincere
• Parents who suffer deep depression may need professional counseling
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REACTION SYMPTOMS & BEHAVIOR
HOW TEACHERS HELP
Acceptance • Recognition of the need to modify their lives
• Willingness to apply new knowledge to meet the child’s needs
• Conviction that the child is unique, special and worthy of love and affection
• Learn skillful ways to help the child
• Patience in teaching parents new skills
• Praise parents for the child’s progress
WE ARE DONE! NOW,CLICK ME AGAIN! THAT’S AN
ORDER=)
A FATHER’S PERSPECTIVE
A father’s Perspective Mending shattered egos – affected that stigmatize the
family’s social and community image Total involvement or total withdrawal Their daily life is oriented to the outside world and
experience more stress when the child fails to conform to its norm – schools, sports
SIBLINGS REACTIONS:• Wonder about the cause• Feels that having to help take care of the handicapped child
will interfere with their own activities• Want to talk to the parents but may not know how to open the subject• Feel upset and angry when parents spend more time with the
handicapped child – may try to get attention by acting like one or causing other problems
• May not know how to get along with the handicapped sibling – play, babysit, teach, etc.
• Feel that they have to work extra hard to excel to make up for the sibling’sdeficiencies
• Worry about how to tell their friends – and wonder if they will makefun of them or their family for being different
• Worry about taking care of the sibling in the future or if anything happens to the parents
• Wonder if they will be able to get married and have handicappedchildren
NEEDS:
To be included in discussions and making decisionsOpportunities to express their feelings about
reactions of peers and to acknowledge theirown feelings of guilt
Need for adequate amount of attention from parents Need for honesty in general
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