peace zones 4 life curriculum (1)

PEACE ZONES 4 LIFE | curriculum for neighborhood peace-building

PEACE ZONES 4 LIFE NEIGHBORHOOD CURRICULUM © 2017 Peace zones 4 life

A INITIATIVE OF THE DETROIT COALITION AGAINST POLICE BRUTALITY |

Peace Zones 4 Life CURRICULUM FOR NEIGHBORHOOD PEACE-BUILDING

PEACE ZONES 4 LIFE NEIGHBORHOOD CURRICULUM © 2017 PEACE ZONES 4 LIFE 1

ABOUT PEACE ZONES 4 LIFE WAR ZONES TO PEACE ZONES

I. DISTRIBUTE PARTICIPANT SURVEY (30 min.)

II. ABOUT PZ4L (5 min.)

a. Detroit is under attack. Much of the violence is the result of the increased police

presence inside and outside our city. We can point to the senseless tragedy of 7-

year-old Aiyana Stanley Jones who was shot to death in the early morning hours

on May 17, 2010 while asleep on her grandmother’s couch. Since then there

have been so many more incidents, too many to count both locally and

nationally.

b. Violence is not limited to the police. Violence happens among us every day. And

most of them are due to conflicts between families and friends…along with a

smaller number due to criminal activities including drugs, break-ins and

robberies. But we have to stress that the vast majority of police runs are because

of interpersonal conflicts…violence due to strained, bruising and brittle

relationships.

c. We know that in an atmosphere of casual and deadly violence we have to find

ways to transform ourselves and the institutions that surround us. That is why

we are calling for transforming war zones to peace zones for life where we take

charge of our own safety, security and relationships. Only by acknowledging the

violence within our community can we move toward creating real peace.

d. There are lots of efforts across the city to build community peace and reconciliation.

We are throwing our hat into the ring, and joining with some of those efforts.

III. Raise your hand if you’ve been affected by violence. Talk about it. (30 min.)

IV. Intro to PZ4L Curriculum (5 min.)

Violence Prevention

Conflict Mediation

Character Development


MANAGING EXPECTATIONS (1 HR.) In this section, participants will discuss the basic causes of interpersonal violence in the context of their own

personal expectations and experiences. Participants will role play various examples of interpersonal

violence and develop non-violent strategies and responses.

WHY PEOPLE FIGHT

The main reason people argue and fight is that they have different expectations about the way things

should be. If you are working, living, or interacting with another human being and the two of you have

different expectations, conflict will often be the result.

Most people are unaware of where their expectations come from. People can get their expectations

from a variety of sources:

Family (source of values; provide examples from birth about how to live; our first role models for

viewing ourselves and how to treat others)

Friends (association leads to assimilation; power of the peer group/pressure)

Television (influences thinking and behavior)

Social Media (tells us what we should be paying attention to and how we should think about it;

opens the door to community violence by influencing us to ‘think like’ the group and can generate

anger)

Books (influence the way we think; provide new ideas and a different way of thinking, positive and

negative)

Popular Culture (powerful influencer that can come through any of the above sources)

Each of these sources are received differently depending on the person. Even people in the same family

can have different expectations of how a family should behave.

INSERT ROLE PLAY EXERCISES – Have participants break into groups to develop short skits based on

differing expectations.

Expectations drive what we do. They determine the decisions we make. They determine how we

interact with other people.

What are YOUR expectations? In this section, participants will write out and discuss their expectations in

various social situations.

About Your Future Life

About Other People

About Your Family Members

About School or Work

o Teacher

o Fellow Students


o Boss

o Co-Workers

About Your Friends

What’s more, some people have unreasonable expectations.

Do you have expectations that other people would consider unreasonable? How would you find

that out?

How can we manage our expectations to prevent conflict?

First, you have to communicate your expectations to other people in a way that they

understand.

o Be specific rather than general

INSERT ROLE PLAY (solutions to situations of conflict) - Have participants break into groups to

develop short skits based on differing expectations.

What are your expectations for these sessions? (Writing Exercise; facilitator records responses on

flipchart)


WEEK 2: WHAT IS A RELATIONSHIP? (1

HR.) Definition: A relationship is…(discuss, then define)

HOW DO YOU BUILD POSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS?

You build relationships by having common histories, interests and attitudes:

Interests

o Sports

o Music

o Movies

o Games

Attitudes & Values

o Values

o Core Beliefs

o Similar likes and dislikes

o Similar personality traits

o Similar life goals

Histories

o Similar life experiences

o Similar family patterns

When you share things in common, you have a basis to build a relationship.

You do not have to have EVERYTHING in common to build a quality relationship!

TALKING TO OTHER PEOPLE IS EASY. RIGHT??

Not necessarily. Talking is the primary activity that leads to conflict between people, groups, and

governments. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

To keep your conversations with other people from turning into conflicts, shouting matches, or even

physical fights, follow these actions:

LISTEN carefully

SPEAK only when it is your turn

THINK before you speak

THINK before you answer

Allow others EQUAL TIME; wait for another person to finish their thought before you respond


PAY attention to what people say…and what they don’t say (non-verbal cues, body language—

folding arms, looking away, rolling eyes. What other verbal cues can you think of? Participants will

list their observations about body language)

GETTING TO KNOW YOU – EVALUATING ANOTHER PERSON

How do you get to know another person? That is an important question. Understanding other people

helps to reduce conflict. Here are some ways of getting to know others, and the questions you should

ask yourself as you learn what another person is like:

SOCIAL SKILLS

Are they able to make and keep friends?

Do they work well with other people?

Are they polite and courteous to others?

Can they carry a conversation?

Are they shy?

Are they standoffish?

EMOTIONAL SKILLS

Can they control impulsive behavior?

Can they express their feelings appropriately?

Are they caring toward others?

Do they have a sense of humor?

THINKING PATTERNS

Do they share ideas and attitudes openly?

Do they have a positive value system?

Can they organize and set priorities?

PHYSICAL WELLBEING

Do they demonstrate health habits?

Are they clean—personally and in their surroundings?

Do they have a healthy lifestyle, i.e. food choices, exercise, avoidance of illegal drugs


WEEK 3: FEELING ALONE (1 HR) Some people have a hard time getting along with others because they feel alone, or lonely. There can

be lots of reasons for this. Here are some of the issues that can lead to feelings of loneliness, and for

having difficulties getting along with other people:

Family relationships inability to communicate; conflicts between family members; generation gap;

emotional and/or physical abuse in the home

Problems at school lack of friends/inability to make friends; teasing or bullying; rejection; not

“fitting in”/peer pressure; social media

Difficulties with boyfriend/girlfriend sexual or other pressure; arguments; ‘cheating’

Sexual preference issues lack of acceptance

Difficulties with teachers not getting along; feelings of unfairness; difficulty learning content

Illness or physical challenges embarrassment; difficulty concentrating

Stress consequences of stress; difficulty concentrating; more prone to anger/conflict

Drug or alcohol use distorts behavior; can lead to interpersonal conflict; can cause illness/stress;

can lead to isolation

Participants will write brief answers to the following questions; and facilitator will lead discussion

afterwards.

Do any of these apply to you or to the people around you?

How can you overcome some of these problems?

If the people in your life have these problems, how can you avoid the conflict that may occur

because of it?

Participants will summarize in writing what they learned from this session.


WEEK 4: DEALING WITH DIFFICULT

PEOPLE (1 HR.) Facilitator will lead participants in discussing their perceptions of difficult people.

As you interact with others, you may notice that some people are difficult to live, work, or be friends

with. Participants will talk about the kinds of people they find difficult. Facilitator will record responses on

flipchart.

Here are just a few kinds of people with whom you may have challenges:

WATCH ME!

This person always needs attention. He or she will do anything to be noticed. If they don’t have people

around them, they get depressed.

I’M THE BEST!

This person thinks they are better or more important than anyone else—just ask them. Your needs are

never as important as theirs.

HELP ME!

This person doesn’t believe he or she is capable of doing things. It is hard for them to state an opinion or

make a decision. They are usually influenced by others.

Are there any other kinds of challenging personalities that you have encountered? How do you deal

with these people without getting frustrated? Do you?

I DON’T TRUST YOU!

This person usually accuses others of lying or having something against them. They want to control and

restrict the activities of others. They don’t have many friends.

OUT OF MY WAY!

This person doesn’t care about the rights of others. They will take advantage of people and situations

but don’t feel guilty if someone else gets hurt because of them.

ON THE EDGE!

This person likes to take dangerous risks and is impulsive. It is hard for them to follow through on plans

or promises.

ROLE PLAY: Participants will develop short skits to illustrate various kinds of difficult people and

situations with an eye towards resolution.


WEEK 5: PATTERNS OF BEHAVIOR

THAT CAUSE CONFLICT (1 HR.) Facilitator will discuss how destructive behaviors are developed, and how participants can reverse

them. Participants will reflect on their own destructive behaviors and come up with their own personal

plans for improvement.

DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS

Certain patterns of behavior almost always cause conflict. Here are some destructive patterns to avoid:

CRITICISM

Being judgmental toward others

Always/usually looking for problems

Having a false sense of superiority

DEFENSIVENESS

Resisting attack

Not admitting errors or weaknesses

Getting angry easily when your opinions or actions are challenged

STONEWALLING

Keeping an emotional distance

Using jokes or other tactics to keep people at a distance

Refusing to give reasons for your behavior

Participants will write about their own personal reflections and engage in self-criticism; and work with the

facilitator to develop an action plan for positive changes.


WEEK 6: ANGER MANAGEMENT (1 HR.) Anger = an intense feeling of irritation

Anger often leads to destructive or aggressive behaviors that can hurt you or others. Controlling

your anger is the most important thing you can do to prevent conflict. Here are some typical angry

behaviors:

Attacking others

Making mean and negative comments

Violence toward others and oneself

Being irrational and unable to listen to reason

Demonstrating harmful nonviolent action

o Manipulation

o Domination

o Neglect

CONFLICT—STOPPING THE SPIRAL

There are several ways that conflict gets out of hand. Here are just a few:

Escalation—when one or both persons in an argument feel they have to “one-up” the other in

anger or negative talk, and each refuses to back down

Invalidation—when one person rudely puts down the ideas or behaviors of another

Negative interpretations—when one person hears what another person says more negatively

than the other person intended

Withdrawal—pulling away emotionally by refusing to talk about an issue

You CAN stop the spiral!

AVOIDING JEALOUSY

Jealousy=feeling threatened or wanting what someone else has

Ever heard the term “green with envy?” It refers to someone who is so jealous of another’s success or

good fortune that they nearly make themselves sick. A jealous person:

Demonstrates a lack of trust and respect for the other person.

Is often “clingy” or dependent.

Feels threatened by the success or popularity of others.

Needs to control the relationship. Always wants to know where the other person is and how

he/she is spending time.

Always requires “proof” of the other person’s feelings.


The best way to avoid jealousy is to work on YOURSELF. If someone you know is jealous, you may have

to avoid them for a while or learn how to address their feelings of jealousy and control.

REDUCING INTENSE FEELINGS

It may not seem like it sometimes, but you really do have the ability and power to reduce your intense

feelings or anger, jealousy, frustration, or sadness. Here are some of the strategies you can use:

Be responsible for your own actions.

Consider the feelings of the people involved.

Take a step back. Calm down. Breathe slowly and deeply.

Listen and answer carefully. Choose words that help, not hurt the situation.

Work together to resolve the issue.

Understand that some conflicts take longer to resolve than others. Be patient.

WORK ON YOURSELF!

One of the best ways to avoid conflict is to concentrate on improving yourself! If YOU work on YOU,

you’ll have less time to be angry at others!

Develop Your STRENGTHS

Increase your knowledge base

Cultivate necessary life skills

Understand yourself and others

Problem-solve wisely

Work on Your WEAKNESSES

Learn to manage stress

Eliminate inaccurate beliefs

Be aware of negative habits

Improve your self-esteem

CONTROLLING YOUR ANGER

It is possible to control your anger, or at least the behavior that can stem from your anger. Also,

consider that POSITIVE anger can motivate a person to become more mature and make better

decisions. USE your anger to motivate you to:

Learn from a failed situation

Look at the bigger picture

See new possibilities

Understand better yours and others’ motivations

Do that, and you will experience the accomplishment of overcoming a challenge.


Happiness gets better whenever you overcome a challenge.


WEEK 7: FORGIVENESS & EMPATHY (1

HR.) Forgiveness is one of the most powerful ways to heal from conflict. It is characterized by:

Making an active choice not to get even or put down the other person

Making an active choice to reduce feelings of anger and resentment

You CAN choose to forgive! It takes practice, but it can be done…

One of the best ways to create feelings and actions of forgiveness is to have empathy for another

person…

EMPATHY

Empathy involves concern, sharing, sympathy, and compassion. It is, essentially, putting yourself in

another person’s shoes so that you understand their feelings, life situations, and motives.

Think about a person you are or have been angry with. What kind you empathize with them about that

helps you understand why they behave the way they do?


WEEK 8: I HAVE ARRIVED!

INTRODUCTION TO PEACE ZONES 4

LIFE (2 HRS.) From War Zones to Peace Zones…

I HAVE ARRIVED!

Nobody ever totally “arrives,” but there are ways to know when you have reached a decent level of

maturity. Here is a checklist of questions to ask yourself:

Do I get mad easily?

Do I give up easily?

Do I keep my promises?

Do I think about the needs of others?

Do I ask for help when I need it?

Am I willing to wait for what I want?

If you answered NO to the first two questions, and YES to the rest, you are pretty mature! If not, you

have work to do. Focus on that work instead of arguing with other people.

Participants will select two of the above character qualities and write a self-assessment of their own

adherence or lack of adherence. They will select one quality they believe they exemplify and another

quality they think they should work on.

CAN’T WE ALL JUST “GET ALONG”?

A healthy community is not one that has no conflict, but one where the people who live there have

learned how to manage conflict. Here are some community “rules” to follow:

Build trust

Communicate openly

Care deeply

Demonstrate emotional maturity

Show mutual respect

Develop common interests and activities

Compromise and cooperate

Create “safe spaces”

Create clean communities

Incorporate creative and community projects (art, theatre, block parties, bake sales, bar-b-

ques, building ‘community’ snowmen, car washes, etc.)


Plant gardens

Attend your local church or faith-based institution

Get to know your neighbor

Helps seniors in your neighborhood (odd jobs, store runs, lawn cutting, etc.)

LOVE AND ACCEPT ONE ANOTHER

BRING THE NEIGHBOR BACK TO THE ‘HOOD!!

Facilitator will now talk about Peace Zones 4 Life—the vision and mission. Youth will define for themselves

what a “Peace Zone” looks like in their school. Their vision becomes the basis for educators to develop art

and other creative projects (theatre, music, etc.) around students’ feedback to implement in the school and

the community. Art projects can be used in the community to advance the Peace Zones concept in the

target neighborhood.


COMMUNICATING THE RIGHT WAY (ARE YOUR FILTERS OFF?)

The best way to keep conflict at bay is to make sure that you are not listening to another person

through filters that keep you from interpreting another’s words or actions correctly. Here are some

filters to avoid:

Not paying attention

Being clouded by emotions

Hearing only what you want to hear

Interpreting what someone says incorrectly by assuming facts the speaker has not said

WHEN YOU GET THERE, HELP ANOTHER ONE GET THERE TOO

If you have worked on yourself so that you have reached a level of maturity, help somebody else! As a

friend, you can:

Listen carefully

Get involved (don’t ignore warning statements)

Ask honestly about your friend’s feelings

Be non-judgmental; don’t warn or threaten

Learn how you can help the right way

Know the resources in the community that can provide assistance

peace zones 4 life curriculum (1)

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