poetry 2003-2008
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Poetry2003-2008
Lqoau
ARRIVE
Don’t mind this spit, don’t mind the shine
I’m reborn for the thousandth time,
it don’t mean much, don’t look for signs,don’t fall behind, just stay in touch,
where my flesh beats with the fevered rush
of rhyme alight like desert brush,
where I hold the fruits of life in clutch,
and taste it as it runs down my fingers.
Stay close to me, I have no fear,
I left it all to make it here,
and everything that I held dear,I left the smoke and now I’m clear,
but like a winter cold, it lingers.
Say your prayers, but do not cry,
and leave your flowers where I lie,
or stay here and we’ll bide our time,
for it doesn’t matter where I go,
my soul will never die.
Now some may laugh at these designsthat flow out like an ancient wine,
those who lose themselves in time,
yes, you who seek, but still can’t find,
close your eyes, there are no secrets.
I’ve felt our everlasting doom,
while trapped here in this tiny room,
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those restless, burning nights of gloom,
when my skin was tightened like a tomb,
but through it all, there’s no regrets.
For don’t forget I’ve worn those rings
like chains; those strings of pretty things,I’ve given up so many dreams
for soft and empty offerings—
all the things we live without
cause we can’t live without,
the cancers and candy,
the oceans of drought…
But you know I will make it,
there never was a doubt,
for you’re granted all the world when you’re living down and out.
And now that I have found my peace,
no earthly things compare,
I threw away near all my clothes,
and shaved off all my hair,
in the shade or in the bright sunshine
I always get a glare,
but it doesn’t matter how I look, I know my time is here.
Now I’m reckless as a summer’s dream
and childish like a dare.
You may say that I am stepping back,
but don’t say I’m unprepared.
For everyone says to keep Austin weird
but Austin’s just scared;
wearing oversized sunglassesto try and hide their fears,
and when their eyesight’s failing
they pretend like they don’t care,
while their youthful cries for paradise
grow thin just like the air,
but I’m a real easy walker,
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yeah, you can take me anywhere—
it doesn’t matter where I go,
my soul will find me there.
Don’t mind this spit, don’t mind the shine,
I’ve come here for the thousandth time, it don’t mean much, don’t stand in line,
don’t wait for me to raise the dead,
or bring forth fish and loaves of bread,
for I’ve stumbled far too many times,
I’ve missed my step, I’ve worked my grind,
I’ve struggled, but I’m bound to climb,
until my words all sound divine,
and when I stand here blazing,
with all my stars aligned,don’t ask where I’ve been hiding,
for I’ve always been alive,
yes, I may have been mistaken,
may have taken too much time,
but while my flesh was fighting
I’ve been waiting to arrive.
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SHE TALKS TO GOD
In the sand
she leaves two perfect prints,
she talks to God,
she just doesn’t know it yet.
Her bathing suit clings
to two perfect breasts,
as she moves like God
beneath the sunset.
The secrets of life
spring forth from her lips,
like pieces of God
are held in her kiss.
Her eyes so dark
no stars can exist,
for she sees like God
across the abyss.
And I think like God,
and long to undress;
that soft, tender touch,
our bodies at rest.
Though many men pine
to feel her caress,
when I talk to God,
I tell him I’m next.
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TRINITY
I rose early on the seventh day,
before the morning sun had strayed,
and walked the streets until I came
unto the place where saints are made,and sinners come to find their way
from the trials of the wilderness.
But I have nothing to confess
and I don’t believe that life’s a test,
I only came so I’d be blessed
by an angel wrapped in earthly form,
named for the flowers that were born
in the soft showers of a springtime storm,
beneath the canopy on a moonlit morn,and though her petals grow with thorns,
I long to touch her perfect form,
for she is love for men who’ve scorned
the hope that they might be reborn.
I see her climb the granite steps,
with her boyfriend in his Sunday best,
his cotton pants are nicely pressed,
for he says the Lord expects no less
than a Rolex and a pinstripe vest,
but Rose is in a simple dress,
and soon she will be wearing less,
for once the faithful bow to pray,
we’ll rise up and slip away,
and find a quiet place to stay
where we can hide
from those who’ve gathered just inside,
as God has set his best gifts aside
for those who’ve strayed.
I can feel the longing in her steps,
and the subtle whispers in her breath
are like prayers that only I can hear.
I answer her as I draw near
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and whisper nothings in her ear.
“Not here,” she says, and leads me down the hall.
“My father’s house has many rooms,” she says,
“and we can use them all.”
So I sweep her off her feet
and I take her to an empty suitewhere the offerings are kept.
I lift her on an empty desk,
and slide my hands inside her dress,
press up her legs and let them rest
above the softness of her flesh,
and caress her panties where they’re wet
before I pull them to her feet
and draw my fingers to her heat,
the edges of our bodies meetlike pieces that become complete.
Her body trembles at my touch,
my steady, soft, forgiving touch,
and so I leave my tender touch,
but stop before it gets too much,
and using the table as my crutch,
I clutch her sides and enter in,
she feels me throbbing from within,a glowing spot beneath her skin
returning where the world begins,
like paradise has come again,
as we move without a touch of sin.
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DYNAMITE
The buildings held from where we stood,
the future seemed alright,
but you never really understood
how the darkness could burn so bright,until I touched the secrets of your soul
against the dead of night,
and those moments we keep stored away
unfolded like our finest whites.
And we were live like dynamite,
two time-bombs ready to ignite,
you always said one day we’d shine
as we burst into some grand design,
but those moments where we touch the light
burn quick, you better hold on tight.
In the sanctity of strangers,
our faith was like a mirror,
and our breath was swept across the stars
like the days when God was near,
but still our innocence was fragile,
and skies were crystal clear,
I knew that soon we’d drift away--
I never thought we’d disappear.
The skyline’s rambled free too long,
it’s time we paid the price,
let’s strip and lay our bodies down
like we were one with Christ,
they say that we have made mistakes,
it’s true, but don’t think twice,
we could have slept away our youth,
but love’s the greatest sacrifice.
And we were live like dynamite,
two time-bombs ready to ignite,
you always said one day we’d shine,
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as we burst into some grand design,
but those moments where we touch the light
burn quick, you better hold on tight.
Every comfort has it’s consequence,
those soft dreams were all just lies,and the conflict seemed unavoidable
like Mona Lisa’s eyes,
but I knew that we had lost too much
when you stopped me with your sigh,
and said we’d never be forgiven,
no matter how hard we try.
Yet we were live like dynamite,
two time-bombs ready to ignite,you always said one day we’d shine
as we burst into some grand design,
but those moments where we touch the light
burn quick, you better hold on tight.
We’ve reached the end, but do not cry,
through all we’ve seen how could we try?
The fire’s still blazing in our eyes,
and the paper moon is rising high,so you should stay, but do not ask me why
the stars sing praises for the sky,
for in their flames we live our lives,
and in the smoke we die.
The match is lit, the plan’s been made,
come, do not be afraid,
if there’s anything you wish to say,
then turn and look toward yesterday,be mindful, but do not run away,
and when the fuse runs out, get down and pray.
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MY LATEST ENDORSEMENT
I long for the day when poets
will be replaced by machines;
assembly line sentences
sputtered out and sold,painless and paper-free-
poems that have no need for me.
For skies are smudged,
the clouds look bleak,
and all the thoughts I try to speak
are puddles lost beneath the ink,
come, we don’t have time to think,
each word is just another link
fastened to their metal feet.
I await the day that I am outdated
by automated poetic technique,
once feelings fade and fingers creak,
and soon I will be obsolete,
just look at what fills the streets,
when crowds disperse it’s still concrete,
and no matter how vague this seems
it’s kept alive by gasoline,
we once survived on bitter greens
in simpler times than we have seen,
but these memories are bittersweet,
and eternity seems incomplete,
we win once we admit defeat.
I long for the day that they sell,
bottles of new poem smell
to mask my moldy metaphors
and wash my wasted words-
all the awkward thoughts you’ve never heard.
I want my love poems finely misted,
syllables scented sensually
with chemicals that smell like the sea,
and move as smooth as Vaseline,
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until there’s nothing real left in me
except that which comes out beautifully.
Perfection can only be found
pounded into pavement,
forget the ground we’ve saved, process it and praise it.
Words only survive on sidewalks
and raised beside city blocks,
not this talk that spits forth in tangents,
when even rock has chipped away
we’ll still have the fragments,
so shed your tears and then repent,
soon all poems will be about cement.
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AWAKE
Dawn falls upon my lawn,
my selective memory,
yes the words are gone
but still they live with me,asleep within a yawn
someday I’ll set them free,
for within me sleeps a song
and I won’t let it be,
and though it might be wrong
the verb and noun agree
that when the lights turn on
they’ll be my canopy.
The sentences are longand yet they follow me,
the moments once belonged
but now they stifle me,
I’m weak but words are strong,
and they won’t let me be.
Dawn falls upon my lawn,
the night is all I see.
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SAMANTHA OF THE STARS
You hung like a diamond watch-
you wasted little time,
and stretched yourself across the stars,
your path arranged like signs,your body like a fairy tale
you let your legend shine,
and ever since I learned to read
I dreamed that you were mine.
For I was the kid in class
with the everlasting eyes;
my lashes wet like kerosene
and a lighter at my side,
lost in teenage poetry,
I never thought to try,
yet every night I stole away
to stare out on the sky.
For many speak of destiny
but never see just why
their horoscopes and magazines
won’t save them from their lives.
Those who sleep their days away,
and when the end comes, cry,
those who work to fill their plates,
yet eat with no delight.
Yes, those who think our lavish dance
is the shuffling of some feet,
those who stop to point and laugh
as we fumble for the beat,
but when we find our song at last,
it never sounds so sweet,
and though their eyes can’t recognize
me as I walk the streets,
I’ve fallen from the very place
I saw you shine for me,
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I’ve crossed the world a thousand times
and now my path’s complete;
I’ve turned my darkness into day,
and tomorrow we shall meet.
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CANADA
This war of love is dangerous-
there’s prisoners, and many die,
and bombs with little angel wings
are falling from the sky.I’ve seen young men swept away
while their mothers watched and cried,
it seemed it had to be this way;
that they were born to die,
for it’s a lonely road all on your own,
and a tough call to defy,
and there’s soldiers just beyond my door
that are calling me outside.
But I don’t want to go,
I can stay here alone.
I’ll find some way to spend my time
and everything will be fine.
And I hear it’s pretty nice up north,
and though the weather’s cold,
I’m told there’s lots of space to dream,
and to walk as I grow old.
The path ahead is full of pain,
each outcome holds a crime,
but for now I must go steal away,
I cannot fall behind.
This war of love is dangerous-
there’s prisoners, and many die,
and now they’ve sealed off all the borders,
I haven’t got much time.
My freedom seems so far away
from this bedroom where I lie,
but maybe you could stay with me
until it’s safe to try.
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I BELIEVE IN LOVE AGAIN
I believe in love again,
it caught me by surprise,
all the dreams came rushing back
when I looked into her eyes,the polar caps are melting down,
the populations rise,
they say that we are doomed for death,
I don’t believe their lies.
I’m in love with the world again,
though it’s heading for decay ,
and I’m thankful for the tragedies
that led me on my way,
and I’m thankful for the miracles
that washed the pain away,
though everything’s not settled yet
I love what’s here today.
I have found a friend again,
I can’t believe she’s true,
for I’ve looked upon so many eyes
that I could see right through,
if life were just a game of chance
whatever would we do?
I love this very universe
for bringing me to you.
I love the human histories
trapped inside my mind,
I love the way they come to me
in majesty and rhyme,
I’ve made it far, I’m not done yet,
there’s something I must find,
yes, I believe in love again,
but now is not the time.
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CARNAVAL
We moved in such a simple way,
the night was soft like masquerade,
and love was just a drunken game
we played while distant couples madepromises to share their lives,
and spend their nights in worn disguise,
but we have left those plans behind,
for who knows where the morning lies
when our bodies drift out like the sea,
and each song is an eternity,
when through the darkness I can only see
whatever lies in front of me.
And like a crashing wave you came,
and stopped me from my spin,
your eyes were light like pantomime,
your body hushed against my skin,
your kisses sweet like caramel
your venom felt within,
like a worker’s strike it started up,
and like a bonfire ends,
the local floors will close their doors
but love will burn again.
I wore my glasses through the night,
and left them where you lay,
for a longing eye’s not hard to find,
there’s new ones everyday,
when you thought it was your part to try
and say we’d never change,
I showed you how they reached my heart
right through the longest vein.
There’s a chance we’d never sleep apart
if I had caught your name,
and though I may have asked you once
I could not lay the blame,
there’s so much lost in circumstance,
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the future’s hard to claim,
and if we ever met again,
it would not feel the same.
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L WORDS for Bob Dylan
It all started when I heard your voice
come crashing through the air,
and a spirit swelled inside my heartthat I could hardly bear,
for at first your words came through so sharp
I almost shed a tear,
and you sang my secrets out so loud
I feared they all would hear,
it’s a wild and reckless world we’ve built,
not everything’s so clear,
but when the haunted streets grew dark
you stayed there without fear.And in the silence of your summer dreams
nothing can sound wrong,
the pauses ring like poetry,
and every word belongs,
I can feel the wonder coming through,
I know it won’t be long,
the world’s been stuck here waiting,
and it’s time I found my song.
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AVALANCHE
I know that I have stayed too long
when night falls, and nothing’s done.
The rumbling sounds of sleep are strong,
as I wait here for the storm to come,but soon the lonesome clouds will shake,
and the skies will tear from where they’ve hung,
the massive walls of ice will break,
and earth will fall back where it’s from,
and I’ll be forced to recreate
just how it felt when we were young;
as the landscape wandered wild and free,
and we flourished like a desert weed,
for many men have lived off luck,
but this time all we’ve got is trust,
and I wonder if that will be enough,
or when the snow comes will it bury us?
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PILLOW TALK
I’m slowly slipping into exhaustion,
words too heavy for the page
and now I’ve lost them,
verbs too violent for the nightwhen I came across them,
nerves too feeble for the fight,
and I must take caution.
It takes a rigid mind to still the page,
when giving up is all the rage,
and it takes the name of some crusade
just to make it through the day.
But I’ve fought on, and done my best,
and now I’m lulled by thoughts of rest,
no, I don’t care if I’m the best,
just let me fail if life’s a test,
for it’s too late to make things right,
and I don’t need to see the light,
yes, let me sink into the night
if there’s nothing more to write.
The words are gone but feelings stay,
sometimes I wish they’d go away,
for every night I bow to pray,
and hope that it will be okay.
But will I see the light of day,
with dreams so far from where I lay,
and nothing but a tired sigh,
as my life keeps passing by?
But I’ll hold on to them until they die,
and tomorrow I won’t waste my time.
I’ll seize my light and let it shine,
I’ll meet the day, I’ll start the climb,
but will I have another try
or is this incomplete?
For weeks I’ve paced
these empty streets
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and now I’m beat.
The sentiments sound sweet,
as I lay here in soft defeat,
no I don’t care what happens next,
just let me go to sleep.
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THE TERMINAL
Cut these curses from my flesh,
this sickness from my skin,
everything that dies within,
whether it’s love or hope or mortal sin,the preacher says it lies within,
and I can’t take another step
surrounded by this living death
that circulates with every breath,
and takes until there’s nothing left.
No dreaming as I lie awake,
the hours burn, my body aches,
I toss and turn until day breaks,it’s hopeless, there is no escape.
I feel no shame in losing time,
I gave up waiting for a sign,
it’s not a badge, it’s not a crime,
I just fell a bit behind.
The angels linger where I lay,
there’s nothing standing in the way,
our time is but a brief delay,
and I’m just stuck here waiting
for them to carry me away.
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I’LL BE YOUR SLEEP
Close your eyes my little child,
there’s nothing here to see,
and set aside the tired lies
our waking minds perceive,outside the streets are dark and wild,
the criminals run free,
but laying in this little world
there’s only you and me.
Stay until the morning comes,
think nothing of retreat,
and if you stay awake all night
I will be your sleep.The mysteries are hidden
deep beneath your satin sheets,
lay your head and find them,
before the night’s complete.
Tomorrow’s still a world away,
let it meet you there,
forget what happened yesterday,
we don’t have to care,
easy like an ocean wave,
the dream is ours to share
now close your eyes my little child,
for all is safe and fair.