posey cohen 3 handouts.self talk

8/14/2019 Posey Cohen 3 Handouts.self Talk

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Adapted fromEmpowering Dialogues Within, Kate Cohen-Posey (John Wiley & Sons Inc. 2008)

SELF AND PARTS

Directions: Which theorist originated each of the following definitions of the Self and personality parts: RobertoAssagioli (1927), Kate Cohen-Posey (2008), Michael Gazzaniga (1980s), Carl Jung (>1912), Andrew Newberg(2006), Richard Schwartz (1980s), Eckhart Tolle (1999), John & Helen Watkins (1970s), Ken Wilber (1980s)

Self Parts1. Self: Provides energy to create meaning, unity, and

individuality and to help fulfill a persons potential. It isthe organizing principle of the mind:

_________________

Complex: An emotionally charged cluster of ideaswitha core issue at its center that attracts similar lifeexperiences.

2. Higher Self: A center of pure awareness and pure willcapable of mastering, directing, and using the mindand body. It is both individual and transcends thepersonal self: _______________________

Subpersonality: Parts of the Self containing fragmentsof what we believewe are, what we want to be, how wethinkwe should appear, and internalizations ofsignificant others that exist in various degrees oforganization and refinement.

3. Hidden Observer: An ego state that tends to be lessemotional and wiser than other ego states and maygive guidance regarding therapy:

___________________

Ego state: Organization of behavior and experience intoa (mental/behavioral) pattern that is separated fromother states by a semi-permeable boundary.

4. Transpersona l Self: Eme rges from a universa l

d imension a nd uses the persona lity to witness

menta l, emotional and physic al experienc es

and provide guida nce for growth:

________________

Subpersonality: Subvoc al voicesin one s inner

dialogue that vie for atte ntion a nd

do minanc e. They vary in deg ree o f

detac hment and need to c ontrol.

5. Core or True Self: Both a n inner

co mp assionate , confide nt lea de r and an

expansive, boundary-less state of mind,

which ha s been a nd is a lwa ys present in an

individua l: _____________________

Part: A d iscrete a nd a utonomous mental

systemwith emotions, expressions, ab ilities,

desires, interests, ta lents, temp erame nt,

worldviews, and possib le assoc iated age s.

6. Consciousness: Essential being-ness or I- am

presenc e tha t is aw are, moment-to-moment,to witness, observe, and point out:

______________

Ego: Reoccurring thought formsand

conditioned mental-emotional patternsinvested with I-ene rgy. Rep et itive thoughts,

emotions, and b eha vior rea c tions with which a

person identifies.

7. Selves: Menta l p roc esses (meta -cognitions

or thoughts about thoughts) that ob serve,

question, and dialogue with distressing inner

voices to p rod uc e c larity, ca lmne ss, and

empowerment : ______________________

Part: Any sub voc a l me ssages (thoughts) that

c rea te d istress in their a ttem pts to m anage the

deta ils of life.

8. Tha lamus: Reg ulates inco ming sensory

information and communicates a lucid senseof rea lity to the c ortex during foc used , c a lm

sta tes: ________________

Mental Modules: Indep end ent loc a tions in the

bra in whe re experienc es are p roc essed and

stored as sensations and images. Verba l Selfinthe left b ra in wa tc hes sensa tions and

ima ge s produc ed by other modules to ma ke

sense out of them by sp inning a narra tive.

Cognition: Abstract processes the brain uses to organize and make sense out of our perceptions.

During trauma an imbalance may occur in the nervous system causing maladaptive information to be

held in a disturbed state. How are cognitions similar to or different from personality parts?


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NEGATIVE COGNITI ONS

Directions: Use memories of upsetting situations or persons to identify cutting comments that are triggered in

your mind. Check any inner commentary that you hear in your worst moments:

DIRECTING (SUPER EGO) VOICES

Controller VoiceAutonomy v. Shame & Doubt You cannot. handle it, be trusted, stand it You cannot show emotions. speak up You have to control things (yourself); you have

to fix everything.

Protector Voice----Initiative v. Guilt Youre not safe. Youre trapped.

You cannot tell, speak up. You might (will) fail, get hurt. You cannot make a fool of yourself. You might get sick, die, make others sick You could do something awful. You cannot handle new, unfamiliar situations. Youre responsible for others, everything You (your judgment) cannot be trusted. You cannot trust others. You are (will be) ruined, damaged You have to be perfect; you cannot make

mistakes. What if what if what if?

Pusher VoiceIndustry v. Inferiority You have to., You better, You should Have you done, Have you done You have to have what you want when you want

it. You have to find excitement, a purpose, enough

of what you want.

You have to get it (done) NOW.

Pleaser VoiceIdentity v. Role confusion You have to please everyone. You (your needs) are not important; others come 1

st.

Others might not like how you sound, look, act You cant find love, caring, understanding, approval,

attention You could be abandoned; youre empty, alone You need others; youre incomplete on your own You have to make others love, understand, care for,

approve of you.

Critic Voice--Introjections Youre worthless, defective, inadequate, a failure,

disappointing, different, weak, dirty, at fault Youre helpless, powerless, a fool You dont deserve love, happiness, to live Youre not good, smart, attractive enough... You should have .

DISTRACTING VOICESTRAITS

Controller (blaming) Voice: They have no right to ; They shouldnt be so .

Protector (perfectionist) Voice: They cant be trusted;They cant handle .

Pusher Voice: They have to., better, should.

Pleaser (clinger) Voice: They have to love, understand, be there for me

Critic (judger) Voice: Theyre disappointing, foolish, failures, weak, dirty,

at fault.Addict Voice:

This will be the last time Ill. It wont matter if I.

Distracting voices: The Controller, Protector, Pusher, Pleaser, and Critic can face outward and focus on others.

Be alert to ruminations that contain the wordsHeshould, She never, They always. Addict monologues

have been added to the list above, because they avoid angst.Directions: Mark any familiar words of blame, judgment, and so on that target others.

Dis-identify: Identifying personality parts and ego states with names or images, or referring to

negative personality parts in the 2nd

person: A part of you thinks, Youre telling her she is not good

enough. This reinstates disturbing sub vocal voices as inner objects that can be faced and questioned.


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Disassociate: Cutting ties with the Self and other inner voices by an ego state that forms solidified

boundaries, resulting in a sense of not-me-ness. This causes disruption in awareness, memory

(amnesia, blackouts), identity, or perceptions of the environment

CASE STUDY

A client named Bess has OCD and genital herpes. She had first become infected 7 years ago, but

only had 3 outbreaks in the first 3 years after exposure. Her obsessions include finding and confessing

to any man she had sex with (prior to marrying 3 years ago) that she could have given him herpes,

worrying about all sorts of contamination, particularly when she uses bathrooms, washing her towels

daily, etc. She is currently pregnant. Her therapist has helped her (1) identify the voice of an OCD

personality part and (2) coach her core Self to make observations and ask questions:

OCD: You dont deserve to pray with the people at your church.Self: Why doesnt Bess deserve to be at church? [Q]OCD: Because shell spread her herpes to everyone.Self: Youve been tormenting her for a long time; [N] you just have new material. (Bess remembers

telling herself as a teenager she might give people AIDS for no logical reason). Why did youstart on her in the first place? [Q]

OCD: She thought she was perfect (seems surprised by the answer she hears from within).Self: How did you think tormenting would help?OCD: My role is to help her stay perfect by making sure she hasnt hurt anyone or spread a disease.Self: Feels at peacesees the vicious cycle of her circular reasoning.

Bess had 3 OCD free weeks until someone told her that women with Herpes could kill their babies

while giving birth. OCD came back with a vengeance.

OCD: The whip cream you left in the frig youre moving from has contaminated the entire house.Self: Whats the chance of that happening? [Q]

OCD: Very likely.Self (spontaneously): You know it cannot happenHerpes is spreads from skin-to-skin contact

(Starts crying).Therapist: What inner voice are you hearing now? [I]Bess: Im feeling stupid. I should know better.Therapist: An inner Critic is telling you, You should know better. [I] Ask it why it is scolding [N] and

how does that helps? [Q]Self: Why are you scolding Bess? How does it help her?Critic: Im keeping her in line so she can be perfect.Bess: Its the perfect thing again (feels calm).

COMBINING DIALOGUE WITH EXPOSURE: Bess has excellent rapport with her therapist.

Knowing this, her therapist says, I think I have a sure fire way to cure you of your Herpies OCD, butif I tell you the plan, you may walk out of my office and never want to see me again. Bess says she is

game. Her therapist suggests that Bess go to the restroom, take a paper towel, touch it to her labia,

come back in the office and touch it to her (the therapists arm). Bess looks like a deer caught inheadlights. She admits she is terrified. Shes asked to focus on the partholding the fear.

Therapist: What is the OCD part saying to make your chest so tight? [I]Bess: It says Id give you herpes for sure.Therapist: Ask OCD if anyone has ever had Herpes of the arm before. [Q]


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Bess: (Starts laughing) The frightened part in my chest is calm.Therapist: What is it like to think about touching the towel to your labia and then to my arm now.Bess: Its not a problem.

Steps t o Dia logueInq.

A. Identify any distressing thoughts clients make about themselves or other people.1. Rephrase first-person, I-statements (I should, Ill never) into 2nd person you-statements (You

should, Youll never) to help clients dis-identify with thoughts. Third-person statements (They

better; She always) are correct grammar for parts that target other people.

2. Identify the personality part that is voicingmisguided messages: This increases awareness of what ishappening internally. Any unnamed part that is ignored wields more power. Gradually their identities

will become familiar:

Directors try to keep emotions in check, prevent problems, please others, and reach perfection.They are the controllers, protectors, pushers, people pleasers, and inner critics.

Distracting parts blame, boast, avoid, or cling to people?

3. (Optional) Represent personality part with (Tarot) image, objects, Winnie the Pooh characters, superhero toys, or emoticons,/:-[. The Scream by Edvard Munich can portray worried, OCD parts.4. Ask clients if disturbing inner voices are their real selves? What do they call the ability to observe and

question upsetting thoughts: logic, reason, or a quality from a Tarot card imagepeaceful, graceful,

carefree Self. (Optional) Represent the clients real Self with an image, literary character, super hero,

or, emoticons, 8-)}}.B. Help clients respond to misguided voices:narrate what the personality part is trying to do.

1. Are its intentions to predict, warn, doubt, scold, order, remind, convince, order, and so on?2. Is it causing feelings of sadness, frustration, fear, hopelessness, helplessness, regret, guilt?3. What are the consequences of its line of reasoning? (When you, Bess feels; Doing could result

in.)

C. Formulate questions when it is unclear what the part is doing:

1. Clarify the meaning of vague messagesWhat is bad about? What would itmean to ?What is the chance of happening?

2. Clarify the origin of misinformationWhen did first get that idea? Where do you think that worrycomes from?

3. Clarify the purpose of thoughts Why are you bringing this up now? How do you think it helpsto? What is the reason for?Why instead of ? What would happen if did not? Is there

another part youre holding back? Do you want the last word because you think you are being asked to

give up your power or disappear?

D. Have clients silently speak the words youve formulated by going INside to address an inner part.1. Use 2nd person you-statementsYou have been tormenting Bess for a long time.2. Have clients refer to themselves in the 3rd person by using their name or the pronouns he or sheWhy

are you scolding Bess? How does it help her?

3. Have clients listen for responses from subpersonalities. The dialogue may continue or they may becomequiet. Look for a sense of connection, agreement, or a part withdrawing.

4. Repeat steps A and B if the subpersonality continues to speak or if a new part steps in.

Points

If an emotional part emerges and the client feels sad or the desire to cry, help his or her Self narratethe release of feelingsIt is fine to cry; Make noise; Breathe; Dont hold back.

Be aware ofthe emergence of a new partAsk,What inner voice are you hearing now?


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Personality parts do not need to change, integrate, or disappear. Core Being is strengthened anytime it identifies, narrates, or questions individual facets. If a part continues a disturbing line of

thinking, the Self can simply compliment its strength.

Notice negative reactions clients have towards a part. This indicates the presence of anothersubpersonality. Narrating its messages and asking it questions can make its identity clearerYou seem

annoyed with what the OCD part puts Bess through. Is there another part that wants to make it stop?

Is it hard to trust Besss true Self to keep OCD from taking over? When a clients real Self is in charge,it will always feel compassionate, caring, or curiousity towards even the most hostile subpersonalities.

posey cohen 3 handouts.self talk

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