Chapter 7

Developing and Maintaining

Relationships

• Explain key aspects of interpersonal relationships

• Describe how and why we form relationships

• List the advantages and disadvantages of relationships

Chapter Outcomes

• Describe the factors that influence self-disclosure

• Outline the predictable stages of most relationships

Chapter Outcomes (cont.)

The interconnections

and interdependence

between two

individuals

Interpersonal Relationships

Interpersonal communication: the exchange of verbal and nonverbal messages between two people who have a relationship and are influenced by their partner’s messages

InterpersonalRelationships (cont.)

A web of relationships that connect individuals to one another

Relational Network

•Family: A small social group bound by ties of blood, civil contract, and a commitment to care for one another

Types of Interpersonal Relationships

•Friendship:– Close and caring

relationship between two people

– Perceived as mutually satisfying and beneficial

– Offers support, companionship

Types of Interpersonal Relationships (cont.)

•Romantic Relationships:– Include love, or deep

affection for and attachment to another person• Love includes eros, ludus,

storge, pragma, mania, agape

– Include intimacy, or closeness and understanding of a relational partner

Types of Interpersonal Relationships (cont.)

•Online Relationships– Social Information Processing

Theory argues that virtual relationships are as close as face-to-face relationships.

– Hyperpersonal communication: online communication that is even more intimate than face-to-face

– Include friendships, romances, business relationships, group memberships

Types of Interpersonal Relationships (cont.)

• Functions of relationships– Companionship (inclusion)– Stimulation– Goal achievement

• Interpersonal attraction– Proximity (nearness)– Physical attraction– Similarity

Why We Form Relationships

• Costs and rewards– Social exchange theory balances

advantages and disadvantages– Rewards

• Extrinsic (external advantages)• Instrumental (shared resources)• Intrinsic (personal satisfaction)

– Costs• Cause stress or annoyance

Managing Relationship Dynamics

• Reducing uncertainty– Uncertainty reduction theory:

People need information to become closer or separate.• Passive strategies include observing and

monitoring.• Active strategies involve checking with a

third party.• Interactive strategies involve asking the

person for information.

Managing Relationship Dynamics (cont.)

• Dialectical tensions: contradictory feelings that tug at every relationship– Relational dialectics theory

• Autonomy vs. Connection• Openness vs. Closedness• Predictability vs. Novelty

Managing Relationship Dynamics (cont.)

• Social penetration theory (SPT):

How relationships move from superficial levels to levels of intimacy

Self-Disclosure and Relationships

• Communication privacy management theory (CPM):

– We own private information.

– We control that information.

– Boundary turbulence is a threat to privacy boundaries.

Self-Disclosure and Relationships (cont.)

• Strategic topic avoidance:

– Maneuvering the conversation away from undesirable topics because of potential for embarrassment, vulnerability, orrelational decline

Self-Disclosure and Relationships (cont.)

Stages of a Relationship

• Initiating stage:

– Make contact with another person.

– Many relationships don’t move beyond this stage.

Stages of a Relationship (cont.)

• Exploratory stage:

– Small talk to obtain superficial information

– Uncertainty reduction

Stages of a Relationship (cont.)

• Intensification stage:

– Personal self-disclosure

– Share affection verbally

– Pet names

Stages of a Relationship (cont.)

• Stable stage:

– Integrating or becoming one

– Bonding by sharing public messages about the relationship

Stages of a Relationship (cont.)

• Declining stage:

– Uncertainty events

• Interference

• Unmet expectations

– Relationship Repair

• Repair tactics

Stages of a Relationship (cont.)

• Termination stage:

– Passing away

• Relationship gradually fades

– Sudden death

• Unexpected termination for one partner

Stages of a Relationship (cont.)

• Reconciliation:– Spontaneous development– Third-party mediation– High affect– Tacit persistence– Mutual interaction– Avoidance

Stages of a Relationship (cont.)