Relationships

The formation of relationships

The maintenance and breakdownof relationships

The Social exchange theory

Explanations of Interpersonal Attraction

Physical attractiveness

Similarity in personality

Similarity in attitude

Physical attractiveness Women

Large, widely separated eyes, a small chin and

wide narrow cheekbones.

Men Square jaw, small eyes, thin lips and triangular

upper body.

The hallo Effect Positive traits are

associated with physical attractiveness

Beautiful people are more

Sociable Friendly Happy mature

Reward/Need Theory

We associate people with positive and negative

events/feeling

Classical and operant conditioning

Reinforcement /Affect - Byrne

If someone is the source of a pleasant event we like them

If we are in a good mood when we meet someone we like them

Byme and Clore: state we need a balance in favour of positive events.

Cultural Differences: In many cultures women are expected to forgo any rewards and put their husbands and children’s needs first

Cate found that receiving rewards was the most predominate in determining relationships

However, Cate assumes that we are hedonistic.

However Hays argues that giving can be just as satisfying as receiving rewards

Evaluation of reinforcement theory

It is scientific, as most research is done in a lab

Biological: Dopamine levels are high at the beginning of intense relationships

Evolutionary Aron explains that the brain chemistry would have evolved to speed up the reproductive success of early man

Behavioural: covers ideas like association that is missed by the evolutionary theory.

Similarities: Byrne and Clore

Personality: Two people who are always positive about life will be more likely to hang out that one that is positive & one that is negative.

Caspi and Herbener found married couples were happier if they had similar personalities

Similarity in attitudes

Attitudes: It is argued that within relationships “attitude alignments” often happen.

We adapt our attitudes to fit in with our partners.

Evaluation of Similarities: AO2

Rosenbaum found support when he discovered that participant were attracted to each other because of similarities and became less attracted the more dissimilarities they found

However, Yoshida points out there are more to similarities than just attitudes there is also physical attraction.

Similarity is important as it validates our own views and strengthens our positive feeling about ourselves and is therefore rewarding.

The Matching Hypothesis We don’t seek the most

attractive person, but instead desire someone who matches us physically.

Walster (1966) first study did not support this – At a dance he randomly put people together and discovered the most attractive were rated highest.

The Matching Hypothesis

Evaluation Towhey 1979 – people were scored on the

macho scale and later asked to rate attractiveness of people from photos and biographical information. Those scoring high were more affected by physical attractiveness than others.

So does Physical attractiveness only count at the beginning of a relationship? No, Murstein et al found that married people matched more closely.

The Matching Hypothesis

Repeated in 1969 Walster and Walster used the computer dance procedure. This time participants met before the dance and had more time to appraise one another.

Murstein 1972 used photos of engages couples and found that independent judges did rate them as matching one another.

Maintenance of Relationships

Theories Exchange theory – Homans

1961

Equity theory – Messick, Walster and Berscheid.

Interdependence theory – Thibaut & Kelley.

Maintenance strategies – Ayres (1983)

when people resist change and deny the other’s fears that something is wrong

when a person puts more effort into the relationship.

talking about the issues to maintain a status-quo.

Exchange Theory AO1: Outline Profit and Loss: Relationships are business transactions.

We strive to get the best possible deal. Balancing sexual and companionship rewards, with time and resources used.

Comparison level: A standard with which we judge possible relationships against.

Using past relationships and general knowledge of what we want and expect.

Comparison level for alternatives: The increase in rewards for a new partner

against the cost of ending current relationship

AO2: Evaluation of Exchange

Profit and Loss: (Rusbult and Martz) Women have high investment (children), no money and no where to live = stay in abusive relationships

It does not explain why people leave relationships to be on their own or how bad a relationship needs to be for someone to leave

AO2 Explains Individual

Differences: as we all accept different

levels of profit and loss as we all have different

comparison levels.

Cultural Bias: It is mainly western cultures that are Hedonistic, more collective cultures value group success over personal profit.

Support for Cultural differences: Gergen et al discovered that although American students preferred equity (a constant ratio of rewards to input). European students preferred equality.

LimitationsAre we really that selfish?

It ignores fairness of exchange and focuses on seeking a profit.

Focuses too much on theindividual’s perspective and not the social aspect of relationships.

AO1: Equity theory This theory suggests that we will continue with arelationship if we perceive it as fair.

A fair relationship is a stable one because it isbalanced.

People strive for fairness rather than what they can get out of the relationship.

AO1: Ratio of Input and Output

The equation: One person’s Benefits minus their

costs equals their partner’s benefits minus

Their costs.

Restoring Balance: We change our

1/ demands from the relationship2/ input behaviour

3/ compare our relationship to that of others to see if it is

Worth continuing

AO2: Exchange theory Clark and Mills (1979): We are motivated by the needs of others. Friendships as well as lovers believe and trust that Things will in the end balance out.

Contrived Methodology: Brandau-Brown (2007) Too reductionist, they argue there is

more to marriage. Especially in todays society where there are so many different forms of relationships. It is argued that many of the studies have low ecological validity.

AO2: Exchange theory

DeMaris (2007): Found that it was only women’s feeling of inequality that resulted in

correlating with divorce.

Gender differences: no equality Weltman found men earning more than their wives

had more important careersHowever, women earning more than men did not.This was rated by both husband and wife

Relationship Breakdown

Activity: List as many reasons as you can for why a relationship might fail.

Typical reasons for relationships ending

1. Conflict2. Breaking rules3. Boredom4. Lack of novelty5. Falling out of love6. Saving face7. Problems of abuse8. Perceived changes9. Change in self or other10. An attractive alternative11. Costs outweighing rewards 12. Interference from other relationships

Main Reasons (Duck) Lack of Skills: Poor social

skills can lead to misunderstanding. People lacking social skill are seen as boring or unrewarding.

Lack of stimulation: People expect relationships to grow and if they feel there is no stimulation they move on.

Maintenance difficulties: Lack of time due to commitment or location difficulties

AO1: Duck’s Four-Phase Model

The intra-psychic Phase

Internal thoughts that the relationship is going wrong. Brooding on

partners faults

The Dyadic Phase

Discussions, anger, anxiety, reassessment of

the relationship

The Social Phase

Going public. Seeking support from others

The grave-dressing Phase

Tell the world the relationship was not their

fault

AO2: Evaluation of DuckSupport: Social Skills:

Cina et al found couples relationships improved after they had Coping Enhancement Training

Support: Marital affairs: Boekhout Correlated lack of skills and/

or stimulation with affairs

Critisism: Maintenance: Rohlfing argued that long distance relationship were fairly common and didn’t affect breakdowns.

AO2: Evaluation of Duck Support for The grave-dressing Phase was

found by Tashiro and Frazier (2003) students said they grew in self awareness during relationship breakdowns and were able to move on.

Ethical Issues: As divorce and break ups can be a sensitive subject, especially in women experiencing abuse, the experimenter has to be very sensitive.

Three essay titles

1: A local dating agency is conducting research into the formation of relationships. Explain (using psychological research) why some relationships form. [8 marks + 16 marks]

2: Outline and evaluate theories of relationship maintenance. [8 + 16 marks]

3: Discuss research into the breakdown of romantic relationships. [8 + 16 marks]

The Evolutionary Perspective

Reproductive Success.

This is when an organism reproduces successfully. Any feature that evolves to aid reproduction in a competitive environment helps increases reproductive success.

Evolutionary explanation of relationship breakdown

If men can not offer good resources women may look elsewhere.

If women refuse to produce children or are no longer able to reproduce men will look elsewhere.

Evolutionary explanation of relationship breakdown

Cost related to emotional investment: Need the commitment to share resources

Increasing commitment: Men threatened with breakdown in relationship more likely to give added commitment

Infidelity: Sexual variety is something men like, it may also help them to secure another mate if the relationship looks like it is about to break up.

Support In many hunter-gatherer

societies, the !Kung San or the Ache in Paraguay, people have many romantic relationships before settling down

Buss: Found there are various differences in the cost perceived and they way to deal with relationship breakdowns between the sexes. Women often go shopping while men look for another women.

However; questionnaires = Social desirability

Sexual Selection: Darwin

Males often develop

colourful ways of

attracting a mate

Intrasexual selection

Males compete with other males

Winner gets the mate

Intersexual selection

Females get to choose what trait is selected as these are the traits that will be passed on and males have to compete for.

Short-term mating

Men want sex early = low long term costs + more opportunity to impregnate more women

Men are less choosy and less committed after sex.

Women can only produce one baby so are more selective.

Long term mating

Both women and men are coming together to reproduce and therefore both must be more choosy

Men are looking for a woman who is healthy, young and show signs of fertility.

Older men always prefer younger women

Long term relationships

Women want men who

Invest in resources for her and the children

Who can protect them

Show good parenting skills

Are not too demanding

AO2: Evaluation of Evolution Support: Buss et al found men were

more stressed at the thought of women’s sexual infidelity

Waynforth and Dunbar found women advertise attractiveness and men advertise theireconomic status

Evaluation of Evolution

Animals Reproduction. Humans are more cognitive than animals and more conscious of their behaviour.

Post Hoc: Look back over time to give explanations for our behaviour.

No empirical evidence to support the theory.

Parental Investment Men invest in gaining a

mate

Women invest in keeping a mate

Babies brains are very big. In order for mother to give birth must be born when brain is still growing.

Baby needs feeding and Protection until fully grown

Maternal Investment Women stay to

breastfeed.

Men give very little investment after conception

Women need to be careful about mate choice

Parental Investment

Women only have a few offspring and need men who will provide resources to help offspring survive

Look for men with money whoare humorous kind and generous

Paternal Investment

Sexual Jealousy Men are more jealous of

sexual infidelity

Women are more jealous of emotional infidelity

Cuckoldry: Women can trick men into investing in another man’s children

AO1:Parental Investment

Men can have as many children as they can find women to procreate with. Quantity rather than Quality

Their women must be fit andfaithful (so their Not bringing up someone else's child).

AO2: Evaluation

Geher et al looked at University students and asked them how ready they were for children.

Both male and females answered the same.

When the ANS was measured in response to parenting conditions male arousal was always higher, therefore men has a higher stress response to parenting

AO2: Evaluation

It is argued that evolutionary theory along with social disrespect may help to undermine family values.

Gove argues its important for both partners to feel responsible for the upbringing of their children

AO2: Cross Cultural Studies

Margaret Mead: Wahiba found a society where the men shared the work equallywith the women.

The Tchambuli tribe tradedTheir children as hostages to Another tribe for peace

Investigator Bias: Margaret was too close to the tribes, living with them often asking leading questions.

AO2: Criticism

Historical Validity: Doesn’t take into

account today’s society

1. State Benefits

2. Childcare

3. Working women

4. Gay marriages

Social Psychological reasons for staying together: Some people choose not to have children. Evolutionary theory too reductionist.

AO1: Parent-offspring conflict

Conflict before birth: Foetus secretes a hormone that damages the mother to gain more nutrition.

Conflict after birth: Parents often need to take their attention from older children when they have a new offspring.

Sibling rivalry: This then leads to fighting between siblings for access to parents.

Decreased Investment

Trivers: states children use temper tantrums to obtain parental investment

Young Oranguans often whine at their mothers when being weaned

Auche tribe in South America’s children also through tantrums during weaning

AO2: Evaluation

Support: Mothers with higher blood pressure have fewer miscarriages and larger babies at birth

Salmon and Daly: Young children learn to co-operate with non-relatives to get extra resources, rather than fighting with siblings.

Parent strategies: Encourage offspring to develop their own talents and to allow them to have different interests and friends.

AO1: Childhood experiences

Attachment: Internal working Model

The Caregiving System: Primary care-giver

becomes the model for how to care for others

The Sexuality System: Securely attached people look for sex with love, however avoidance insecure adults may prefer sex

without love.

AO1: Attachment Disorders

Children who find it difficult to become close to others.

Happens from abuse or neglect

Lack of support during stress

They either have a lack of responsiveness or over familiarity

AO1: Interaction with peers

Quinn and Munn believe children also develop from interacting with other children

Good friends during childhood gives you a sense of trust, support and being understood and accepted.

Adolescent experiences

The child combines experiences with parents with experiences with other people and evaluates objectively if their needs are being met.

Child dating helps children separate from parents and develop independent intimate relationships. Some dating is good between 15-17 however too much can become maladaptive

AO2: Support The Love Quiz

Hazan and Shaver printed a questionnaire in a newspaper asking about early childhood and attitudes to romance

Correlation, so no causal statements. Volunteer sampling Questionnaires, social desirability

Attachment type

Secure Insecure avoidance

Insecure resistance

Current love Relationships are positive

Fearful of closeness

Preoccupied by love

Attitudes to love

Trust others and believe in love

Love is not necessary or lasting

Fall easily but it never lasts

AO2: Further Support

Simpson et al, longitudinal study where they discovered securely attached children developed better friendships and later better romantic relationships

Methodological problems: attrition, participants lost over time

Synopticity: Gender Differences

Girls often develop closer relationships while boys are more competitive.

Low Population validity: Many studies have been done in small

groups from certain school, in particularly areas.

AO2: Adolescent

Connectedness: It is better for the child if the parent remains closely involved with their child’s life, while they are developing relationships with others.

Support was found by Larson when he discovered that adolescent relationships compliment parent relationships rather than replacing them

AO2: Peer relationships in Adolescence

Although some relationship in adolescence are beneficial it is argued that too many are detrimental; loss of academic success

However, Roisman found no effect from romantic experiences at age 20 on romantic relationships at 30

Synoptic tool kit

Determinism: This theory seems to suggest if we have insecure relationships with our parents we will have negative/difficult romantic relationships

Research has shown that lots of people who have had difficult childhood relationships with their caregivers are able to go on and develop health adult relationships

Categorizing Cultures

Individualistic: Where the Individual is always more important than the group. People are encouraged to be Independent

Collectivism: People are encouraged to be Inter-dependent in relationships as the group/ family is more important than the individual

Voluntary or Non Voluntary

Western Societies: Have Mobility, thus lots of opportunities to meet lots of different people

Non western cultures: Have less mobility and less opportunity to meet lots of different people

Arranged Marriages

The Planned type: Parents choose the family and bride and groom don’t meet until the wedding

Chaperoned interaction: Male tells his family he wants a wife and they find one.

The joint venture type: Everyone has some say, where dating is allowed

Marring for Love Moore and Leung found

that in Australia Chinese students were as romantic as Anglo-Australians.

Jankowiak and Fischer argue that all humans crave romantic love regardless of culture

However Allgeiert and Wiedman found that while Japanese and American were less likely to marry without love in collectivist cultures like Thailand, Indian and Pakistan student were more likley to compromise.

Divorce Western Societies:

Change is something that is celebrated, divorce is acceptable more now than it was 50 years ago

Collectivist Cultures: Divorce is frowned upon as the extended family unit will be split. Although today things are changing

AO2: Arranged MarriagesEpstein found around half of

arranged marriages had fallen in love

Myers found no difference in marital satisfaction between

love and arranged marriages.

However, in China in 1949 70% of people had arranged marriages today only 10%

In Chengdu women who had married for love felt better about their marriages

AO2:

It is argued Parents are older wiser and not blinded by love and therefore may be in a better position to choose your partner

However Xiaohe and Whyte found freedom of choice promoted marital stability

AO2: DivorceIn 1960 divorce was very low in Europe, divorce has risen as we shifted from an non-urban to urban culture. = more mobility

May not be love or arranged marriages that correlate with divorce but opportunities for meeting more people.

Methodology

In the West we are fixed with doing scientific research in a lab and therefore miss research rich in ecological validity.

It is argued that psychologists must get out and visit other cultures in their natural setting

However, Western psychologists bring their own ideology with them and superimpose their ideas on the new culture

Evolutionary adaptation

Lower Mortality: a happy relationship decreases stress

Improve survival if we were in love

Jankowiak and Fischer found love in over 90% of the 166 cultures studied

Bartel and Zeki claim to have discovered areas of the brain (MRI scan) that light up if person is in love