resistance understanding and dealing with resistance canar annual conference - panama city, fl -...
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IT’S A GOOD THING – IF UNDERSTOOD AND ADDRESSEDTRANSCRIPT
RESISTANCE Understanding and Dealing with ResistanceCANAR ANNUAL CONFERENCE - Panama City, FL - 2014Lou Adams CANAR Training Director
5 GOOD THINGS TO KNOW ABOUT DEALING WITH RESISTANCE
1.Resistance Is A Good Thing2.It’s About Managing Emotions3.It’s About Managing Relations4.It’s About Managing How You Frame Things5.It’s About Your Professionalism
IT’S A GOOD THING – IF UNDERSTOOD AND ADDRESSED
RESISTANCE DEFINED • Resistance is the emotion that occurs when our expectations of “The Way
Things Are” is interrupted.
• Resistance can be defined as an indirect or camouflaged expression of concern, control and/or vulnerability.
• If concerns about feeling out of control and vulnerabilities are expressed directly and openly it is not labeled as resistance
• It is also important to remember than an open disagreement is not resistance – it is simply a disagreement.
FORMS OF RESISTANCEPASSIVE AGGRESSIVE
• Giving one-word answers• Claiming confusion• Denying or smoothing over the
difficult reality• Giving superficial compliance• Rambling• Getting lost in irrelevant details
• Getting angry• Attacking the messenger• Blaming others• Questioning credentials• Going Silent• Changing the subject
THE THREE LEVELS OF THE MEETING
•Level 1: Client’s Emotional Response
• Level 2: Client’s Emotional Response
• Level 3: Counselor’s Emotional Response
LEVEL 1: THE CONTENT LEVEL
• Purpose of the meeting• Addressing the real issues• Dealing with the unwelcome events• Addressing the changes needed
LEVEL 2: CLIENT’S EMOTIONAL RESPONSE
• Client’s Loss of Control• Difficulty Facing Up to Hard Realities• Feelings of Vulnerability
COUNSELOR’S EMOTIONAL RESPONSE
• Counselor’s Loss of Control• Seeking Approval• Threat to self-esteem
ACTIVITY: YOUR WAYS OF RESISTING
1. Please answer the following questions individually• What forms of resistance do you use to avoid losing control, being
vulnerable, or facing up to harsh realities?• Think of a time when you recently became resistant in the face of
difficult news or an unwanted surprise.2. Get with two or three other people and talk about your answers –
telling the story of when you were recently resistant3. Be prepared to offer an example from your group
UNDERSTANDING RESISTANCEClients can become unstuck by knowing what they are going through and getting receiving some guidance and counseling on the process.
ENDINGS AND PRE-CONTEMPLATION
Handle the lossCounselorEmpathetic Listener
DON’T PUSH THE RIVER
IT FLOWS MY ITSELF FRITZ PEARLS
Muskegon River near Whispering Trails, Sylvan Township MI