The Matriarchs

Lesson 1Hagar: Found by God ......................................................3Genesis 16:1-16

Lesson 2Sarah: Blessed with Laughter ............................................8Genesis 18:9-15; 21:1-7

Lesson 3Rebekah: A Servant Leader ............................................13Genesis 24:1-14, 10-21, 50-61

Lesson 4Esau’s Wives: Foreigners in God’s Family ........................18Genesis 26:34-35; 27:46–28:3; 36:1-8

Lesson 5Leah and Rachel: Sisters and Rivals ................................22Genesis 29:15-30

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Prepare Before the SessionRead the session for today in the Study Guide. Then read the options in this Teaching

Guide, placing checkmarks beside the activities you plan to include. After you have decidedwhich options to use, gather the appropriate materials.

WHAT’S IN YOUR TEACHING GUIDE

This Teaching Guide has three purposes:➤ to give the teacher tools for focusing on the content of the session in the Study Guide.➤ to give the teacher additional Bible background information.➤ to give the teacher variety and choice in preparation.

The Teaching Guide includes two major components: Teacher Helps and Teacher Options.

Teacher Helps

Teacher Options

Bible BackgroundThe Study Guide is your main

source of Bible study material.

This section helps you more fully

understand and

interpret the Scripture text.

Teaching Outlineprovides you with an outline

of the main themes in the

Study Guide.

The next three sections provide a beginning, middle, and end

for the session, with focus paragraphs in between.

Focus Paragraphsare printed in italics at the top of the page because they

are the most important part of the Teaching Guide. These

paragraphs will help you move your class from “what the text

meant” to “what the text means.”

You Can Choose!There is more material in each session than you can use, so choose the options from each section

to tailor the session to the needs of your group.

Bible BackgroundHagar’s Affliction by Saraiand Abram

Hagar’s story is inextricablylinked with the account of Sarai

and Abram’s childlessness. She is intro-duced in conjunction with theannouncement that Sarai had not givenAbram children, and she is identified asan Egyptian handmaiden or slave (16:1).

Modern readers might feel uncom-fortable with Sarai’s claim that the Lordwas the cause of her infertility (Gen 16:2).Nevertheless, this is in keeping with theHebrew perspective that all things werecaused by God ( Job 2:10; Isa 45:7) andthat God was the one who opened andclosed wombs (Gen 20:18; 29:31; 30:2; 1Sam 1:5, 6). A barren woman almostinevitably lost status in the household.Children were important because notonly did they contribute to the family’sagricultural subsistence and the care ofelderly family members, they also ensuredtheir father endured beyond his owndeath (Perdue, 189). If a man diedwithout a descendant, his existence wasutterly obliterated—a fate worse thandeath.

Sarai proposed to Abram that herbarrenness could be alleviated by usingher slave as a surrogate mother (Gen16:2b). Surrogacy was common in theancient Near East and was viewed as anacceptable option in Israel as well

(Blenkinsopp, 73). Sarai’s intention wasto be “built up” through her slavewoman. Hagar would bear the child, butSarai would consider the child her own,thereby regaining her status in the family.Abram heeded Sarai’s suggestion unques-tioningly.

Once Hagar conceived, she viewedSarai differently (v. 4). Her attitude mayseem haughty to us, but if we putourselves in her sandals, we might betterunderstand her disdain for Sarai. BeforeHagar became pregnant, she heldminimal status in the family. But once shebecame the wife of the patriarch andmother of his firstborn, Hagar suddenlyhad new standing. As the mother of thepatriarch’s firstborn, Hagar, perhaps forthe first time in her life, had hope for afuture. Her son would be Abram’s favoredchild. As the firstborn he would carry onthe family line and would receive a doubleportion of Abram’s considerable inheri-tance. Hagar’s child would be no slave.

Sarai accused Abram of being respon-sible for Hagar’s contempt (v. 5), but whyshe did so is unclear. Surrogacy was, afterall, her idea. Nevertheless, Sarai cursedAbram and called for divine judgmentupon him. While Sarai’s reaction is diffi-cult to understand, Abram’s response iscold and indifferent. With an air ofnonchalance, Abram told Sarai she coulddo whatever she wished to her slave—thevery woman holding his firstborn in herwomb (v. 6). Neither Sarai nor Abram

1Lesson Teaching Guide

HAGAR: FOUND BY GOD

Genesis 16:1-6

viewed Hagar as worthy of considera-tion; indeed, neither ever called Hagarby name. She was simply a womb to beused for their purposes and thendiscarded.

Most English translations mask theseverity with which Sarai dealt withHagar (v. 6b). The NRSV, for example,states that Sarai “dealt harshly” withHagar. The NIV says that Sarai“mistreated” Hagar. The Hebrew word‘anah, however, indicates horrific abuse,affliction akin to what the Hebrew slavesendured under their Egyptian taskmas-ters (Exod 1:11). Most likely, Saraiphysically abused Hagar, and Hagar fledto protect herself and her baby.

Hagar’s Encounter with GodThe angel of the Lord found Hagar at aspring in the wilderness of Shur, a loca-tion that suggests that Hagar wasattempting to go back to Egypt (Gen16:7). The angel addressed Hagar as the“slave-girl of Sarai,” foreshadowing thecommand about to be given to her. Butfirst, Hagar was asked two questions:“where have you come from?” and “whereare you going?” (Gen 16:8). Hagar onlyanswered the first question, “I amrunning away from my mistress, Sarai.”Then, the angel commanded Hagar to dothe unthinkable: “Return to your mistressand submit to her” (v. 9). How could Godask someone to return to slavery andabuse? God never asked Israel to return toEgypt—though they volunteered severaltimes! But God commanded a victimized,pregnant slave woman to return to hercaptors and endure her captivity.

This unspeakable command was notwithout hope, however, for the Lordoffered Hagar three wonderful promisesthat would make her obedience suffer-able. The first, given to no other womanin the OT, is a patriarchal gift bestowedon Abraham (Gen 15:5; 22:17), Isaac(26:24), and Jacob (28:14; 35:11). Godpromised to multiply Hagar’s offspring somuch they would be innumerable (Gen16:10).

The second promise confirmed andexpanded upon what Hagar knew (v. 11).She is told that she is pregnant and thatthe child is a boy. She is to name himIshmael (“God hears”) because God hasgiven heed to her affliction. WhereasAbram and Sarai had abused and dehu-manized Hagar, their God had taken noteof this slave woman alone in the wilder-ness. She was significant to the Lord.

I. Sarai’s “Gift” of Hagar (16:1-3)A. Sarai’s Barrenness and Hagar’s

Enslavement (v. 1)B. Sarai’s Plan and Abram’s Response

(v. 2)C. Hagar Given to Abram as a Wife (v. 3)

II. Hagar’s Contempt and Sarai’s Rampage(16:4-6)A. Conception Breeds Contempt (v. 4)B. Sarai’s Tirade against Abram (v. 5)C. Abram’s Apathy (v. 6a)D. Sarai’s Assault on Hagar (v. 6b)

III. Hagar Found in the Wilderness (16:7-9)A. The Lord’s Discovery (v. 7)B. The Lord’s Question (v. 8)C. The Lord’s Unspeakable Command

(v. 9)

IV. Matriarchal Promises for Hagar (16:10-12)

A. Innumerable Offspring (v. 10)B. A Son Named Ishmael (v. 11)C. Ishmael: Wild and Obstinate

V. Hagar’s Unparalleled Response (16:13-14)A. A New Name for God (v. 13)B. The Shrine of Beer-lahai-roi (v. 14)

VI. Hagar’s Gift of Ishmael (16:15-16)A. The Birth of Ishmael (v. 15)B. Abram’s Age at Ishmael’s Birth (v. 16)

4 Lesson 1

❍ What’s in a Name?Ask the following questions:

Questions➤ What are the names of your children?

Why did you choose those particularnames?

➤ What does your name mean? Why didyour parents name you that?

Get the group thinking about the signifi-cance of names and how they become partof our identity. Being known by name isimportant. When people know us byname, we feel appreciated. When peopledon’t remember our names, we feel dimin-ished.

Hagar isn’t one of the most familiarOld Testament characters. She was a“nobody” to Abram and Sarai, but shewas significant to God, who not onlyknew her by name, but gave her the

promise of a son with a name. And then,in a most extraordinary act, Hagar evengave God a name.

❍ My Wilderness StoryAsk class members to share an episode inwhich they felt abandoned or rejected byothers. You might begin with a story fromyour own past. Or, you might come with anewspaper or magazine article about acontemporary woman who has prevailedover tragedy. Be prepared for some toshare stories about how they’ve felt aban-doned by the church in times of desperateneed. Such stories shouldn’t be dismissed;this lesson affords an opportunity forhealing.

Move from these shared stories intothe story of Hagar. Note that Hagar oftenhas been neglected in our study of theBible. She was horribly mistreated andfound herself in a wilderness alone and indire circumstances.

The third promise might not soundvery assuring to modern ears. Who wantsto be told that her child will be a “wildass” and that he will always be at oddswith others, even his own family? (v. 12).But listen to these words with Hagar’sears and you will hear words of incrediblehope. As a slave woman, wouldn’t you bethrilled to know that your son would notbe a slave, but would be “wild”? Wouldn’tit be a joyous shock to hear that he wouldbe stubborn and willful and would standup to everyone around him? Unlike you,he will not be used by others for theirown purposes. Rather, he will be inde-pendent, unconquerable, and free.

In response, Hagar gave God a name.While God often revealed divine names tohumans (Gen 17:1; Exod 3:14) andhumans named places after encounteringGod there (Gen 22:14; 28:19; 23:30), thisis the only time in the Bible when ahuman bestows a name upon God. It is aunique name, pertinent to Hagar’sencounter with this Israelite God. Shenamed the deity El-roi, which means “theGod who sees.” Disregarded by hermasters, Hagar was noticed by a deitywho, instead of killing her on the spot,promised her a future. The place ofHagar’s incredible encounter becameenshrined as Beer-lahai-roi, “the well ofthe living one who sees.”

A Way to BeginWhy should we care about Hagar? We could answer with the typical historical-soci-ological response that this story explains how Abraham became the father of theArabs as well as the Jews. But there are other reasons. This story answers the

question, “Where is God when others mistreat and forget me?” It reminds us that God knows us byname and pursues us as we wander lost in our wildernesses. Through Hagar, we discover that Godsees, sustains, and creates hope in the midst of futility. Her story highlights God’s concern for theabandoned, the rejected, the abused, the invisible, and the foreigner.

Teaching Guide 5

❍ Women, Children, and SlavesDiscuss barrenness in the Old Testamentand how polygamy and surrogate mother-hood were common solutions. Abram andSarai’s treatment of Hagar, though proba-bly legal and maybe typical of slavemasters in that day, seems repugnant tous. Point out that Sarai’s mistreatment ofHagar most likely involved physical abuse.

Questions➤ What about Abram and Sarai’s behav-

ior do you find disappointing,surprising, or wrong?

➤ If you were Hagar, how would youdescribe your treatment by Abram andSarai?

➤ Why did Hagar begin to feel contemptfor Sarai after becoming pregnant?

Discuss God’s dialogue with Hagar inthe wilderness. Have the class memberslist the promises God gave to Hagar andthen discuss each in turn. Though God’spromises to Hagar don’t sound veryencouraging in our ears, they gave Hagarhope. Explore why this is so.

Highlight the uniqueness of Hagar’sgiving God a name. Explain what thename means and how it is pertinent toHagar’s situation. Why do you thinkHagar is the only biblical character to giveGod a name?

❍ Compare and ContrastInvite the class to compare Abram andSarai to Hagar. If you wish, divide theclass into two groups, one consideringAbram and Sarai and the other Hagar.Identify areas of comparison and contrastand list them on the board.

❍ Questions to PonderRead Genesis 16:1-16. Ask the followingquestions.

Questions➤ Why did Sarai blame Abram for

Hagar’s haughty behavior?➤ What purpose did God have for

preserving Hagar’s life and the life ofher son?

➤ Why did God speak directly to Hagarbut never address Sarai in a personalway?

➤ What does Hagar’s story tell us aboutthe character of God?

➤ Were God’s promises enough to justifysending Hagar back to her masters?

➤ Why didn’t God just lead Hagar tosafety in Egypt?

A Way to Explore Scripture Genesis 16 does not portray Abram and Sarai in a very positive light. They chose touse Hagar for their own purposes, abused her when she did not conform to expecta-

tions, and disposed of her when she became inconvenient for them. Neither of thempursued Hagar into the wilderness, but God did. In the wilderness, Hagar discovered One whoknew her and who could release her from utter misery through the child in her womb. Trusting inthe God who sees, Hagar found the strength to return to slavery. The same God who met Hagarin her wilderness can meet us in ours. Like Hagar, we can know that God will strengthen us toendure and provide us with hope for the future.

6 Lesson 1

❍ Who Is God to You?Distribute copies of page 28, titled“Names of God.” Discuss the variousnames of God and their meaning.

Question➤ If you could give God a name that is

pertinent to your current circum-stances, what would it be and why?

❍ Where Is Your Wilderness?Hagar’s wilderness was on the road toEgypt. Reflect on whether current circum-stances have created a wilderness in someclass members’ lives. If some are willingto share their situations allow them to doso, but this could also be a silent exercise.

Discuss ways God pursues us throughthe “wilderness.” Does a faithful friendkeep calling and offering help? Perhaps aBible verse keeps coming to your mind,etc. Reassure the class that sometimes weremain unaware of God’s presence untilafter we come through the wilderness.Sometimes we may not sense it at all.

Ask class members to think of at leastone divine promise they can cling to inthe wilderness.

❍ How Do I Treat Others?Ask class members to contemplate howthey, like Abram and Sarai, may havemistreated others. How do we treat thoseunder our authority? How do we treat thefast food worker, the janitor, the trashcollector, or the toll booth employee?Have we ever abused power and belittledanother person?

Pray for God to reveal ways we havemistreated others. Ask God to forgive andto open everyone’s eyes to the invisibleones in society and the church.

ResourcesJoseph Blenkinsopp, “The Family in First TempleIsrael” Families in Ancient Israel, ed. Leo G. Perdue,Joseph Blenkinsopp, John J. Collins, and CarolMeyers (Louisville: Westminster/John Knox, 1997).

Leo G. Perdue, “The Israelite and Early JewishFamily,” Families in Ancient Israel, ed. Leo G. Perdue,Joseph Blenkinsopp, John J. Collins, and CarolMeyers (Louisville: Westminster/John Knox, 1997).

Hagar’s story encourages us to look for God in our wildernesses and to expect tofind our Lord pursuing us there. It calls us to discover hope in the knowledge that

God sees us, cares for us, and enables us to endure our suffering. It invites us to callGod by new names that reflect our experiences with the One Who Is. At the same time, it chal-lenges us to renounce Abram and Sarai-like tendencies toward ignoring, abusing, and using othersfor our own gain.

A Way to End

Teaching Guide 7

2Bible Background

The PromiseLaughter comes in all forms:

giggles, snorts, guffaws,hiccups, roars, snickers, and even

silent smirks. We laugh for all sorts ofreasons—surprise, shock, distress, orrelief. Laughter can come unbidden at themost inconvenient times or can resultfrom the antics of comedians on TV. Wesometimes even laugh at ourselves. Butdare we ever laugh at God or because ofthings God is doing in our lives?Abraham and Sarah did, and they discov-ered that laughing at God can result inunusual surprises.

To understand Sarah’s laughter, somecontext is necessary. After Abram waspromised an heir (Gen 15:5) and Sarahgave him Hagar in an attempt to fulfillthat promise, Abram was convinced thatIshmael, Hagar’s son, was the promisedchild. Ishmael certainly seemed to fitGod’s promise of an heir of Abram’s ownflesh. Since God had not specificallymentioned Sarai as the mother of theheir, it stood to reason that Ishmael wasthe one. Genesis 17 clarifies that this wasindeed Abram’s conclusion, for after Godannounced to the newly renamedAbraham that Sarah was going to bear achild, Abraham fell on the ground andenjoyed a good, gut-wrenching bellylaugh (17:17). Certain that God had to bejoking, Abraham said, “Oh that Ishmael

might live in your sight” (v. 18). In otherwords, Abraham was content to haveIshmael as his heir; there was no need forSarah to conceive. But God had a differ-ent plan. Though Ishmael would beblessed and become a great nation (v. 20),the child born through Sarah would bethe recipient of God’s covenant. Sarahwould bear the child within a year (vv. 19,21). God names the child “Isaac”(yitschaq), meaning “laughter,” in responseto Abraham’s laughter and lack of faith(17:19), not Sarah’s, as is often assumed.

One would think that, on hearingthat Sarah would be a mother in her oldage, Abraham would return home, tell herthe good news, and begin the process ofconceiving the child. But in chapter 18,every indication is that he did none ofthose things.

The VisitorsThree visitors (identified as angels by thenarrator) arrived at Abraham and Sarah’stent. After providing a meal for them,Sarah went back into the tent and leftAbraham to converse with the men (18:1-8). This conversation reveals Abraham’scontinued lack of faith. The spokes-angel(who is interchangeable with the Lord)asked Abraham where Sarah went,perhaps to ensure that the conversationwould be between himself and Abraham(v. 9). Then, the angel restated thepromise already given to Abraham inGenesis 17: this time next year Sarah will

Lesson Teaching Guide

SARAH: BLESSED

WITH LAUGHTER

Genesis 18:9-15; 21:1-7

have a child (v. 10). Sarah, who waslistening nearby, overheard.

The narrator intervenes at thispoint to let the reader know howimpossible such a promise is. Sarah wasnot just old; she was also past menopauseand physically unable to conceive a child(v. 11).

Given that Sarah reacts with surprise(v. 12), it seems apparent that Abrahamhad failed to announce this joyful newswhen he first heard of it. In addition, twothings should be noted about Sarah’slaughter. First, the narrator tells us thatshe laughed within herself, not out loudand raucously as Abraham had. Hers wasa gleeful inner giggle. Second, Sarah didnot laugh (at least initially) about theimpossibility of having a child. Herlaughter originated from her delight thatshe would experience sexual pleasureagain. (The Hebrew word clearly meanssexual pleasure.) The fact that she isthrilled at this prospect suggests thatAbraham had not approached her sexu-ally for a long time, even after the originalannouncement in Genesis 17.

God does not address Sarah with thenext question (v. 13). Rather, it is directedat Abraham, again suggesting that thisstory is about his lack of faith, notSarah’s. The Lord asked Abraham whySarah had laughed and why she had ques-tioned the possibility of having a child ather age. We might read between the linesand add to the query an unspoken,“Didn’t you tell her?” The second questionis also directed at Abraham: “Is anythingtoo wonderful for the LORD?” (v. 14).Once again, the promise of Sarah’s immi-nent motherhood is repeated.

At this point the focus turns back toSarah, who denies laughing. Whether shedid so out of fear for herself or perhapsfor Abraham is unclear. The identity ofthe person who says, “Oh, but you didlaugh,” is ambiguous in the Hebrew sincethe pronoun in “but he said” could refereither to Abraham or to God. In Hebrew,pronouns referring to deity are spelledexactly like pronouns referring to

humans, so it is impossible to know whothe speaker is. Unfortunately, someEnglish translations remove that ambigu-ity by capitalizing “he.”

The JoyGenesis 21:1-7 focuses on the fulfillmentof the promise of chapters 15, 17, and 18.The narrator highlights God’s faithful-ness in bringing the promise to fruitionthrough Sarah, repeating her nameseveral times: “The LORD dealt with Sarahas he had said, and the LORD did for Sarah

I. Sarah’s Discovery (18:9-15)A. What Sarah Overheard (18:9-10)

1. The Angels’ Question (v. 9)2. Reiteration of the Promise (v. 10)

B. Sarah’s Laughter (18:11-12)1. Explanation for Sarah’s Inability to

Conceive (v. 11)2. Sarah’s Gleeful Giggle (v. 12)

C. Abraham Rebuked by the Angel(18:13-14)

1. First Question: “Why did Sarahlaugh?” (v. 13)

2. Second Question: “Is anything toowonderful for the Lord?” (v. 14a)

3. Reiteration of the Promise (v. 14b)D. Sarah’s Fear (18:15)

1. Sarah denied laughing (v. 15a)2. Someone (Abraham? Angel?) said,

“Yes you did!” (v. 15b)

II. Sarah’s Joy (21:1-7)A. Fulfillment of God’s Promise (21:1-5)

1. The Lord’s Faithfulness (v. 1)2. Birth of the Son (v. 2)3. The Boy Is Named Isaac (v. 3)4. Isaac Is Circumcised (v. 4)5. Abraham 100 Years Old at Isaac’s

Birth (v. 5)B. Sarah’s Laughter (21:6-7)

1. Statement of Joy: “God Has BroughtLaughter for Me!” (v. 6)

2. Question of Joy: “Who Would EverHave Said . . .?” (v. 7)

Teaching Guide 9

❍ LaughterBegin the class with laughter:

➤ Tell some good jokes, or ask classmembers to tell some of their favorites.

➤ Ask class members to share an embar-rassing or surprising story aboutthemselves. (Begin by telling one onyourself!)

➤ Show a brief video segment of one ofyour favorite sitcoms.

➤ Share comic strips from the newspaper.

Laughter is our natural response tosurprise, joy, embarrassment, and funnysituations. Today, we are going toconsider how Abraham and Sarahresponded to what they thought wasGod’s funniest joke ever. Have you heardthe one about how a hundred-year-oldman and a ninety-year-old woman had ababy?

❍ SurprisesThis beginning can be as simple or aselaborate as you wish. If you have timeand the inclination, put together a smallgift basket or treat bag for your classmembers. You could include a refrigeratormagnet with a Scripture verse, a packageof gum, an herbal tea bag, a couple ofchocolates, or other small, inexpensiveitems. Place the gifts on the chairs beforeclass members arrive or hand them out atthe beginning. If you prefer, you couldbake a batch of muffins for the class,bring donuts, or bring a special blend ofcoffee to share: anything out of the ordi-nary that would pleasantly surprise yourclass.

After class members have enjoyedtheir surprise, ask them to share somestories of happy surprises in their lives.Discuss Abraham and Sarah’s reactions tothe surprising announcement that theywere going to be parents in their old age.

as he had promised. Sarah conceived andbore Abraham a son in his old age, at thetime of which God had spoken to him”(Gen 21:1-2). After so much anticipation,this announcement of Isaac’s actual birthseems almost anticlimactic. The focusturns immediately to Abraham’s circumci-sion of the boy on the eighth day inaccordance with God’s command (v. 4),but this quick transition is the narrator’sway of emphasizing that Isaac was indeedthe covenant child sealed through the signin his flesh.

This time Sarah laughed out loud inresponse to the joy of Isaac’s arrival (vv. 6-7). In a pun-ful play on Isaac’s name,Sarah said, “God has made laughter(tsechoq) for me! Everyone who sees willlaugh (yitschaq) with me!” Announcingwhat must have been the joke of thecentury, Sarah gave words to the irony ofher situation: “Who will say to Abrahamthat Sarah is actually nursing sons? But Ihave given birth to a son in his old age!”(writer’s translation). So, at the age ofninety, Sarah found herself blessed withlaughter and surprised by joy.

A Way to BeginWhen have you been pleasantly surprised by God? Perhaps you were drawn toGod unexpectedly from a background of disbelief. Perhaps God surprised you bycalling you to a vocation you never would have chosen for yourself. Perhaps you

discovered God unexpectedly present in the midst of despair. Perhaps you received an answer to aprayer you once thought impossible.

Sarah had resigned herself to the reality of her infertility. Many years had passed since Godpromised Abraham an heir of his own flesh, and, like Abraham, Sarah probably assumed thatIshmael fulfilled God’s plan. Sarah could not have imagined that God had another plan in mind. Atage ninety, Sarah was about to receive the best surprise of her life.

10 Lesson 2

❍ Struggling to BelieveSummarize Genesis 15:4; 16:1-16; and17:1-14. Remind the class of God’s origi-nal promise to Abraham, noting thatSarah’s role is unspecified (15:4). Discusswhy God did not specifically tell Abram inthis original promise that Sarai would bethe mother.

Ask someone to read 17:15-21 to setthe stage for the focal verses. Discuss whyAbraham hoped God would considerIshmael as his heir.

Have someone read 18:9-15. Whatelements in this story indicate thatAbraham still did not believe in God’spromise that Sarah would bear a child?List responses on the board. Conclude byreading Genesis 21:1-7, noting the narra-tor’s emphasis on the fulfillment of thepromise through Sarah.

Questions➤ Does it bother you that the “father of

faith” so often lacked faith in God’spromises?

➤ Was God’s command to name the childIsaac (“laughter”) punishment forAbraham’s lack of faith, a display ofGod’s use of humor and irony, or some-thing else?

➤ Why did God never speak to Sarahdirectly about her role in the covenant?

Abraham’s lack of faith and trust inGod is understandable considering thatpost-menopausal women do not typicallyconceive and bear children. Nevertheless,he was given the promise directly fromGod numerous times. His unwillingnessto accept God’s word caused him to with-hold the promise from Sarah and delay itsfulfillment. Most of us struggle withtrusting God. Like Abraham, our lack offaith can lead to inaction and delay.

❍ Joyful SurprisesSummarize Genesis 15:4; 16:1-16; and17:1-21. Ask two volunteers to read thefocal passages, then invite class membersto look for details in the story that aresurprising or humorous. List these on theboard, elaborating each one as needed.

Sarah was clearly surprised by joy andcertainly appreciated the humor of hersituation, but she had waited many longyears for the joy of Isaac’s birth. Theseyears were fraught with jealousy, bitter-ness, and perhaps even isolation. In thedepths of our own despair, we may forgetthat joy is possible and our hope fails us.Not every situation ultimately becomesjoyful or humor-filled, but sometimes weare pleasantly surprised by God’s unex-pected appearance in our lives.

Question➤ Though the Bible records Sarah’s joyful

reaction to Isaac’s birth, why is it silentabout Abraham’s?

God chose to do the unexpected by providing a child to a couple much too old toproduce children. Surprising Abraham with the announcement in Genesis 17, God

had to work around the old patriarch’s obduracy by letting Sarah overhear the promisefor herself. When the year passed, Sarah found herself holding laughter in her arms. When itcomes to God, we should expect the unexpected.

A Way to Explore Scripture

Teaching Guide 11

12 Lesson 2

❍ Trusting GodAbraham’s difficulty accepting God’spromises provides a helpful paradigm forevaluating our own problems with trust.Distribute copies of page 29, titled“Trusting God.” Ask class members to fillit out. They may not have time to dealwith more than one issue during class, soask them to concentrate on just one ortwo. Encourage them to work on otherareas during their private devotions thisweek.

After sufficient time, ask if some willshare their responses.

❍ How Have I Been Surprised by Joy?The joyful end to Sarah’s barrenness is awonderful reminder that God can do theimpossible. Ask the class to share theirstories of God intervening in a situationin a surprising or humorous way.

Since some class members may be inthe midst of difficult circumstances, becareful to discuss the fact that not all situ-ations end joyfully nor should theirgravity be dismissed. Be especiallymindful of any class members who arestruggling with infertility or who haveexperienced miscarriage or the death of achild.

Our disbelief in the greatness of God’s plans can paralyze us into inaction. LikeAbraham, sometimes we prefer security, and we ignore or push aside God’s voice

within. Unable to take a chance on uncertainty, we deny ourselves (and possiblyothers) the opportunity to experience something extraordinary.

Sometimes God surprises us with plans that are different from our own. We often dreamsmall, not daring to imagine what is possible with God and not caring to take any risks. Sometimes,however, God drops in unexpectedly, surprising us with a new vision for our future and inviting us totake an entirely different path. In such times, we—like Sarah—are surprised by joy.

A Way to End

3Bible Background

The ServantThe story of how Isaac and

Rebekah met is unusual, to saythe least. First, Isaac did not

choose his own bride. Second, Isaac andRebekah were almost complete strangerswhen they wed. Theirs is certainly not amodern love story.

The account begins with Abraham oldand well-blessed (Gen 24:1). Rather thancalling Isaac to his side to give him ablessing, Abraham called a trustedservant to find Isaac a bride (v. 2).Perhaps after almost losing Isaac to thesacrifice in Genesis 22, Abraham had nostomach for sending his son away to finda bride for himself, but no reason is givenin the text for why Abraham chose tosend a servant instead.

The servant placed his hand underAbraham’s thigh and swore a solemn oath(24:2b). In Hebrew, the thigh is sometimesa euphemism for the genitals (see Gen46:26; Exod 1:5; Judg 8:30). It is possible,therefore, that the servant was required toswear on Abraham’s genitals that hewould find a proper wife for Isaac. Suchan oath was a way of expressing one’sabsolute commitment to carry out whatwas promised, much like placing one’shand on the Bible in a court of law.However, the exact symbolic significanceof the genitals is unclear. Possibly theyrepresent the Abrahamic covenant signi-

fied in the circumcised flesh. Or theycould be symbolic of progeny, a fittingsymbol in this context since the servantwas sent to find a wife through whomAbraham’s descendants would beproduced (Wenham, 141).

Swearing “by the LORD, the God ofheaven and earth,” the servant placedhimself under divine judgment should hefail in the task with which he wascommissioned (v. 3). His mission wasstraightforward: do not choose a wife forIsaac from among the Canaanites, but goinstead to Abraham’s “country” (probablyHaran in northern Mesopotamia) andfind a wife from among Abraham’s rela-tives (vv. 3-4).

Abraham’s concern derives from thepractice of endogamy or marriage withinthe kinship group. Lineage was importantto the Israelites. Material possessions andthe family name were to be passed fromfather to son in unbroken succession,thus preserving the purity of the blood-line and the integrity of the propertyrights. This required not only that thesons be able to trace their lineage throughthe patriarchs, but also that their wives bemembers of the same clan or tribe.Although marriage within the immediatefamily was forbidden in the law codes(Lev 18; 20), marriage to first or secondcousins was considered ideal becauseclose kinship ties were thereby preserved(Perdue, 183; Meyers, 36). Therefore,Abraham sent the servant to find a wife

Lesson Teaching Guide

REBEKAH: A SERVANT LEADER

Genesis 24:1-4, 10-21, 50-61

whose pedigree derived from the line ofTerah, Abraham’s father.

The BrideThe servant set off from Canaan accom-panied by ten camels and all sorts ofgoods (v. 10). A prospective groom wasrequired to pay a “bride price” (Hebrew,mohar) for his wife consisting of materialsthat would not only demonstrate thegroom’s competence as a provider, butalso compensate the family for the loss oftheir daughter’s labor (Perdue, 184). Oncehe arrived in Haran, the servant went tothe well and allowed the camels to rest (v.11). And there he uttered a prayer forGod’s guidance. In a Gideon-like test, theservant asked for the following sign: hewould ask the girls who came to the wellto give him a drink and the one whooffered to water his camels also would bethe wife for Isaac (vv. 12-14).

As strange as this sign may appear tous, the Lord honored the servant’srequest. Rebekah arrived at the wellperfectly qualified to become Isaac’sbride. Not only was she one of Abraham’srelatives (the granddaughter of Nahor,Abraham’s brother), but she was alsobeautiful and a virgin (vv. 15-16). WhenAbraham’s servant asked for a drink,Rebekah complied and offered to drawwater for the camels as well (vv. 17-20). Asshe sated the animals’ thirst, the servantsilently watched, attempting to discernwhether she was, in fact, the one he hadprayed for (v. 21).

In the intervening verses (vv. 22-49),the servant confirmed that Rebekah hadall the qualifications to be Isaac’s wife andbestowed gifts upon her (two bracelets forher wrists and a ring for her nose, v. 47).Rebekah ran to her house to report thesethings, and her brother, Laban, invitedthe servant to stay. At the meal, herecounted the events leading up to hisarrival and discovery of Rebekah.

After hearing the servant’s account,Laban and Bethuel agreed to giveRebekah as a wife for Isaac. In response,the servant paid a generous bride price,

with items of gold and silver given toRebekah, her father, her brother, and hermother (vv. 50-53).

The servant demanded to leave withRebekah the following morning, butRebekah’s parents wanted her to stay atleast ten more days with them. Theservant, however, was eager to returnsince his journey had been so successful(vv. 54-56). Rebekah’s mother and brotherdecided to let Rebekah decide whether shewould go with the man immediately (vv.57-58). Although some think thatRebekah was being given a choice eitherto go with the man or to stay with herown people, that is not the case. Thenegotiations had already been completed:she was Isaac’s bride. Her only choice inthis situation was when she would go.

I. The Servant’s Commission (24:1-4)A. Abraham Old and Well Blessed (v. 1)B. The Servant’s Oath (vv. 2-4)

II. The Servant’s Plan to Find a Bride forIsaac (24:10-14)A. The Bridal Gifts (v. 10)B. Arrival at the Well (v. 11)C. Prayer for a Sign (vv. 12-14)

III. Rebekah: The Answer to Prayer (24:15-21)

A. Rebekah’s Arrival and Qualifications(vv. 15-16)

B. The Servant’s Request for a SignFulfilled (vv. 17-21)

IV. Marital Negotiations (24:50-53)

V. A Daughter’s Farewell (24:54-61)A. The Servant’s Request to Leave

Immediately (vv. 54-56)B. Rebekah’s Decision (vv. 57-59)C. A Blessing for Rebekah (v. 60)D. Rebekah’s Departure (v. 61)

14 Lesson 3

❍ Finding Mr. or Miss RightTailor this beginning to fit the makeup ofyour class.

For married couples (widows andwidowers certainly can participate, but ifsomeone has recently lost a spouse you’llneed to evaluate whether this beginning issuitable). Prior to Sunday, ask classmembers to bring a few wedding picturesto Sunday school. In class, pass the photo-graphs around so everyone can enjoythem. Then ask several members to sharehow they met their spouses and how (andwhy) they decided to get married.

For singles. Clip the personal ads fromthe Sunday newspaper and bring them toclass. Share several samples or enlist a fewclass members to read individual adsaloud. If you have time, do an informalsurvey by compiling a list of what men saythey want in women and vice versa.

❍ WaterBring a bottle of water for every classmember. Either place a bottle in eachchair before students arrive or pass thebottles out as they enter.

As the class members enjoy theirwater, explain that water is easy for us tocome by. We can pour ourselves a glassstraight from the tap or buy it in bottlesfrom the store. In biblical days, water wasnot so easily acquired. People (usuallywomen) had to walk to local wells, drawthe water by hand, and carry it back totheir homes. The woman we are studyingtoday had no idea that performing thistask would result in a marriage proposalfrom a stranger in a foreign land.

Biblical love stories don’t read like Romeo and Juliet. There is no young lovethwarted by feuds between rival families, no romantic soliloquies, no tragic deathscenes. Instead, there are arranged marriages, proposals by proxy, lots of camels,

and gifts of nose rings. Although a story like Rebekah’s may not cause goose bumps and heart-rending pathos, it can offer us insights into the fortitude and bravery of one young woman. Rebekahtook the initiative to offer a drink to a thirsty stranger and his camels, and this one small actlaunched a series of events that made her the next matriarch of Israel. With Rebekah, we areinvited to ask ourselves, “What initiatives can I take on behalf of others?”

A Way to Begin

Teaching Guide 15

Rebekah bravely chose to go immedi-ately to marry a man she had never met.With only her nurse, some slave women,and the gifts she had been given (v. 59),she mounted a camel and went to anunknown land—much as her new father-in-law, Abram, had done so long ago. Herfamily bestowed upon her a beautifulblessing as she departed:

May you, our sister, be for thousands of ten thousands and may your seed possess the gate of those who hate him. (v. 60,writer’s translation)

The blessing foreshadows Rebekah’s roleas the mother of Jacob, and it echoes oneof God’s statements to Abraham (Gen22:17) in stating the assured victory ofRebekah’s descendants.

❍ Probing QuestionsDiscuss the following questions afterreading the appropriate sections in thetext. You can discuss these together orassign each section to a small groupwithin the class.

Genesis 24:1-4Endogamy is the practice of marryingwithin the family group. Abraham andSarah were half-siblings (Gen 20:12);Rebekah and Isaac were cousins; as wereJacob, Leah, and Rachel. Today, we wouldconsider this incest.

➤ How can we reconcile biblical practiceswith modern morality—or should we?

Genesis 24:10-14➤ What do you think of the servant’s

method for determining Isaac’s bride? ➤ What are some legitimate means for

discerning God’s will today?

Genesis 24:15-21➤ If we praise Rebekah’s assertiveness in

this story, do we condemn her asmanipulative and immoral when shehelps Jacob gain his father’s blessing(Gen 27)?

Genesis 24:50-53Paying a bride price sounds to our earslike a business transaction in which thewoman is bought and sold. In fact, it wasa test of the groom’s financial stability.

➤ What rituals and laws do we impose onpotential brides and grooms thatsomeone in the future might finddisconcerting?

Genesis 24:54-61➤ How is Rebekah’s situation similar to

Abraham’s (Gen 12:1-3)? How is itdifferent?

➤ What does Rebekah’s journey say abouther character?

❍ Point of ViewThe biblical account is told almost exclu-sively from Abraham’s servant’sperspective. After summarizing the story,divide into three discussion groups.Assign each group one of the followingcharacters: Rebekah, Laban, Isaac.

Give each group a copy page 30, titled“Point of View,” to use in completing theirassignment. Ask them to retell the storyfrom the perspective of their character,focusing on how that person might haveperceived the events differently.Encourage them to have fun with theirretelling, using as much imagination andhumor as they can, but also taking seri-ously the perspective of their assignedcharacter.

A Way to Explore Scripture In patriarchal times, it was important to marry within the clan or tribe. Such concernsseem foreign to modern readers who do not choose their spouses based on the same

criteria. It is important to bridge the gap between the ancient concerns of the writerand the modern concerns of your learners. Help them to understand the social structures of thecharacters and then let class discussion bring out points of commonality.

16 Lesson 3

❍ Take InitiativeMost of us are fairly skilled at criticizingand complaining. It’s easier to point outweaknesses and failures than to take theinitiative to find solutions. Ask classmembers to list the needs and problemsin the class or the church. (Try to keep thediscussion from devolving into a gripesession.)

Next, brainstorm possible solutionsfor each of the problems or needs listed.Finally, challenge class members to takethe initiative in implementing solutionsto these problems. Encourage specificcommitments to action rather thanambiguous assents.

For example, perhaps the carpet inone of the Sunday school rooms is wornand dirty. An obvious solution is that itshould be replaced. If there is no moneyin the church budget for this project, yourclass members could volunteer to do thelabor themselves using donated supplies.The carpet could be replaced with mainte-nance-friendly tile and washable rugscould be placed in the room for warmth.Some problems and needs might not beso easily solved, but at least the group canbegin to focus on finding answers ratherthan lamenting over difficulties.

❍ Give a Drink of WaterRebekah took the initiative to providewater for Abraham’s servant and hiscamels. Her willingness to serve theservant set her apart from the otherwomen at the well and launched her onan incredible journey.

For most of us, a drink of clean wateris easy to obtain, but this is not the caseelsewhere. A charity called Living WaterInternational (www.water.cc) is trying tomake clean water a reality for the lessfortunate. Ask your class members if theywould be willing to make a group dona-tion to this (or a similar) ministry.

ResourcesCarol Meyers, “The Family in Early Israel,” Families inAncient Israel, ed. Leo G. Perdue, JosephBlenkinsopp, John J. Collins, and Carol Meyers(Louisville: Westminster/John Knox, 1997).

Leo G. Perdue, “The Israelite and Early JewishFamily: Summary and Conclusions,” Families inAncient Israel, ed. Leo G. Perdue, JosephBlenkinsopp, John J. Collins, and Carol Meyers(Louisville: Westminster/John Knox, 1997).

Gordon Wenham, Genesis 16-50, Word BiblicalCommentary (Dallas: Word, 1994).

Rebekah lived in a culture that afforded women little independence. Even within thosesocial constraints, she took the initiative to serve water to a stranger. One day later,

she set forth on a journey to marry another stranger, leaving her family and homelandbehind. Most of us lead relatively independent lives. We choose whom we will marry, we aren’tforced into particular gender roles, and we travel to distant lands—but usually not one-way. In ourindependence, we sometimes forget the needs of others. With so many resources and opportuni-ties available to us, when will we take initiative on behalf of others?

A Way to End

Teaching Guide 17

Bible BackgroundThe Ideal SpouseOn their own, the accounts of

Esau’s wives might seem oddand theologically insignificant

compared with the other inspiring narra-tives of women in Genesis. After all, whenEsau’s wives are mentioned they aredescribed in unflattering terms orlumped together with others in genealogi-cal lists. Nevertheless, when one takesinto account the context in which thesenotices appear, a subtle theologicalpicture begins to emerge.

It is helpful to begin by comparingGenesis 26:34 with Genesis 25:20. Thesetwo verses reveal that, like his father, Esaumarried at the age of forty. Unlike hisfather, however, Esau chose to marry notone woman, but two, and—more impor-tantly—two women from outside the clan.In Israel, it was not enough for a man tobe descended from a patriarch to receivethe inheritance and pass on the familyname. Men were also expected to marrywomen from the same extended family inorder to preserve the integrity of thefamily line. This practice, calledendogamy, explains why Abraham wentout of his way to ensure that Isaacmarried within the clan (Gen 24). Esau’sdecision to marry Hittite women seemsglaringly contemptuous (Steinberg, 56;Wenham, 204-5).

Religious and Family FrictionsThe Hittites were the descendants ofCanaan, Noah’s grandson (Gen 10:15).They are mentioned numerous times inthe Bible, usually in lists of nations Israelwas to avoid or destroy (see Gen 15:18-21), though several individual Hittites areportrayed positively (Gen 23:10-11; 2 Sam11:11; 23:39). The Israelites were forbid-den to intermarry with the Hittites (orother foreigners) because such nationsposed a religious threat to Israel (Exod34:11-16; Deut 7:1-4). Intermarriage withforeigners was tantamount to religiousdepravity since those who did notworship Yahweh would inevitably drawIsrael into worship of other gods. Thebiblical concern is not with the race orethnicity of such peoples; rather, theconcern is religious. Foreigners (includ-ing women) who worshiped Yahweh werewelcomed into the community of Israel( Josh 6:25; Ruth 4:13-17), and people ofother races intermarried with and becamea part of Israel’s lineage (Gen 41:50; Exod2:21; Num 12:1). Nevertheless, consider-ing the multiple commands not tointermarry with the people withinCanaan, the fact that Esau does so imme-diately casts him and his wives in anegative light.

Judith and Basemath are introducedin Genesis 26:34 as wives of Esau.Unfortunately, this is all we know ofJudith because she is mentioned nowhereelse in the biblical material. Basemath

Lesson Teaching Guide

ESAU’S WIVES:FOREIGNERS IN GOD’S FAMILY

Genesis 26:34-35; 27:46–28:3; 36:1-8 4

appears again in Esau’s genealogy inGenesis 36. Esau’s marriage to thesewomen created in Isaac and Rebekah a“bitterness of spirit” (Gen 26:35): anexpression unique to this verse signify-ing extreme resentment. Esau’s marriageoutside the clan was seen as an affront tohis parents and an assault on the purityof Abraham’s line. More importantly,Esau’s blatant disregard for his parents’wishes (see Gen 28:6-9) and careless indif-ference toward his own birthright (Gen25:34) indicate that he was not the bestcandidate for carrying on the Abrahamicline. In this light, Rebekah and Jacob’sdeception of Isaac (Gen 27:1-29) could beseen as heroic inter-vention, preventing aserious oversight by the blind patriarch.

After discovering Esau’s murderousintentions following the deception (Gen27:41-42), Rebekah employed anotherruse to protect Jacob. Delicately avoidingthe real issue (that Esau wanted tomurder Jacob), Rebekah declared that sheloathed her life because of Esau’s Hittitewives and would have no reason to liveshould Jacob marry such a woman(27:46). Since Esau’s wives were a sourceof bitterness for both Rebekah and Isaac,Rebekah was able to instill in Isaac’s minda compelling reason to send Jacob away.Perhaps remembering his own father’sinsistence upon a wife from within thefamily, Isaac forbade Jacob to marry aHittite woman and commanded him tomarry one of Laban’s daughters.Ironically, Jacob was sent off this timewith an unsolicited blessing from hisfather (28:1-3). Like Esau, Jacob eventuallymarried two women who were also hisfirst cousins. The fact that Leah andRachel were close relatives made themideal choices for Jacob.

Esau’s LegacyThe final passage focuses on Esau’sgenealogy through three foreign women:Adah, a Hittite; Oholibamah, a Hivite (theHivites, like the Hittites, were descen-dants of Canaan); and Basemath, anIshmaelite. The astute reader will notice

some tensions here between Genesis26:34, in which Basemath is the daughterof Elon (a Hittite) and Genesis 36:1, inwhich she is Ishmael’s daughter (see Gen28:9) and Adah is Elon’s daughter.Unfortunately, no simple resolution forthese differences exists, and it is quitepossible that the passages reflect distincttraditions (Wenham, 205).

The repeated statement (vv. 1, 8) thatEsau is Edom is a clue to the thrust of thispassage. Theologically, the genealogy isintended to explain the origins of Edom,a land whose inhabitants stood in almost

I. Esau’s Wives (26:34-35)A. Marriages to Hittite Women (v. 34)B. Isaac and Rebekah’s Bitterness of

Spirit (v. 35)

II. Rebekah’s Ruse (27:46-28:3)A. A Pretext for Jacob to Leave (27:46)B. Isaac Sends Jacob to Find a Wife

(28:1-3)1. Jacob is forbidden to marry a Hittite

(v. 1)2. Jacob is commanded to marry a

daughter of Laban (v. 2)3. Jacob receives a blessing (v. 3)

III. Esau’s Family and Land (36:1-8; [seealso 36:9-19])

A. Introductory statement: Esau is Edom(v. 1)

B. Esau’s Wives (vv. 2-3)C. Esau’s Sons (vv. 4-5)

1. Eliphaz (by Adah) (v. 4a)2. Reuel (by Basemath) (v. 4b)3. Jeush, Jalam, Korah (by

Oholibamah) (v. 5a)4. Summary statement (v. 5b)

D. Esau’s Land (vv. 6-8)1. The Move (v. 6)2. The Reason for the Move (v. 7)3. The Settlement in Seir (v. 8a)4. Concluding Statement: Esau is

Edom (v. 8b)

Teaching Guide 19

❍ Family TreeMany people are taking up genealogy as ahobby. Discuss what your class membersknow about their family histories. Askthem if they have any “black sheep” in thefamily. If so, would they care to explainwhat made that person an outsider? (Thismay be a touchy subject; don’t probe anydeeper than participants are willing togo.)

Ask class members if there have beenany major family rifts. If so, what were thebasic issues involved?

Families are complex and filled withparadoxes. They bring great joy and some-times terrible pain. Today we’re going toconsider a family that was torn apart byrevenge, deceit, and hatred. Central to theconflict were the foreign women whobecame Esau’s wives.

❍ Looking in from the OutsideHave class members reflect on a timewhen they felt excluded or uncomfortably“foreign.” For example, when they didn’tget chosen for the team, were rejected by aclose friend, were traveling in a foreigncountry, were made to feel unwelcome inchurch, etc. Ask volunteers to share theirstories. Let them describe the situation,how it made them feel, and whether thesituation was ever resolved comfortably.

Today we are going to study foreignwomen who may be completely unfamil-iar. They were outsiders whose marriagesto Esau brought them into conflict withIsaac and Rebekah and precipitated Esau’sseparation from the Abrahamic covenant.

Who in the world are Judith, Basemath, Oholibamah, and Adah, and what are theydoing in my Bible? This was probably your first question when you began to readthis lesson, and your students will likely ask the same thing. Esau’s wives are not

exactly famous Bible characters, and we know relatively little about them. Nevertheless, theaccounts about them provide an unusual entree into a very serious and relevant question: Whatis my attitude toward outsiders? In addition, Esau’s negativity toward his family and subsequentrebellious actions can be instructive as we consider our feelings about our own families.

A Way to Begin

20 Lesson 4

constant opposition to Israel. The narrator is interested in establishing the differencesbetween the chosen line of Abraham and lineages related to but outside the Abrahamiccovenant. So, he describes Esau’s wives as “daughters of Canaan” (v. 2) to emphasizetheir foreignness and establish that Esau’s decision to marry such women placed himoutside the covenant. Then the narrator devotes detailed attention to Esau’s move awayfrom Jacob (vv. 6-8) to demonstrate that Esau chose a home outside the land of thecovenant. Esau took a path that separated him first from his parents and eventuallyfrom his people. Like the wives he married, Esau became a foreigner.

❍ Family FeudDivide the class into three groups. Assignone group to study Isaac and Rebekah,one to study Jacob, and one to study Esau.Distribute copies of page 31, titled“Family Feud.”

Have each group consider the griev-ances of its assigned character(s) as theydiscuss the questions raised in theirportion of page 31.

Bring the three groups together. Haveeach group read or summarize theirpassages and discuss their findings.

❍ Strangers in a Strange FamilyBased on the “Bible Background” section,explain the biblical emphasis onendogamy (the custom of marrying onlywithin the limits of a local community orclan) and provide some background onthe Hittites. Ask volunteers to read thethree focal passages.

Genesis 26:34-35Note the contrast between Isaac andEsau’s marriages (Gen 25:20; 26:34).Explain that “bitterness of spirit” refersto a deep resentment toward another.

➤ Why were Esau’s marriages to Hittitewomen so repugnant to Isaac andRebekah?

➤ How do we reflect similar attitudestoday?

Genesis 27:46-28:3Summarize Jacob’s deception of Isaacearlier in the chapter. Rebekah’s realreason for wanting Isaac to send Jacobaway was to protect him from Esau. Evenso, her words reflect the animosity bothshe and Isaac felt toward Esau’s wives.

➤ What do you think about Rebekah’s useof Esau’s wives to get Isaac to do herbidding?

➤ Why did Esau choose to provoke hisparents by marrying foreign women(see Gen 28:6-9)? What does this sayabout his character? His parents’ char-acter?

Genesis 36:1-8Focus on the theological purpose of thisgenealogy, especially in its repeatedemphasis that Esau is Edom. If you have amap of the biblical world, point out whereEsau decided to move.

➤ How did Esau’s decisions to marryforeign women and move to Seir takehim outside of the Abrahamic prom-ises? (If the class seems to struggle withthis question, you might ask someoneto read Gen 15:7, 18-21).

Isaac, Rebekah, and Esau all come across badly in these accounts. Isaac and Rebekahconsidered Esau’s wives a threat to the patriarchal line. Esau was not innocent, for he

clearly derived satisfaction from disobeying his parents and driving a wedge betweenhimself and his family. While it is easy to identify the flaws of others, are we willing to see themin ourselves?

A Way to Explore Scripture

Teaching Guide 21

22 Lesson 4

❍ Family DynamicsAsk the class to silently consider thefollowing questions:

Questions➤ How is my relationship with my family? ➤ Am I holding grudges against anyone

in my family? ➤ Have I done anything vengeful to

someone in my family? ➤ How willing am I to work toward

reconciliation within my family? ➤ How have I cut myself off from my

family?

Pray for God to help us deal with ourfamily conflicts in a Christian way.Suggest that the students pray this weekfor family rifts that need mending and“black sheep” who need restoration.

❍ HospitalityAsk volunteers to look up some of thefollowing passages: Exodus 22:21;Leviticus 19:10, 34; Deuteronomy 23:7;24:19-22; Isaiah 56:3-8; Luke 4:24-27; John4:1-29; Ephesians 2:11-22.

The story of Esau’s wives reflects thehuman tendency to reject the outsider.While the ancient Israelites often viewedforeigners with suspicion, the primarymessage of the Bible is inclusion andacceptance.

Question➤ What steps can we take to develop a

more biblical view of foreigners?

ResourcesNaomi Steinberg, “Basemath 1/Bashemath,”Women in Scripture, ed. Carol Meyers (Grand Rapids:Eerdmans, 2001).

Gordon Wenham, Genesis 16-50, Word BiblicalCommentary (Dallas: Word, 1994).

Esau had reasons to be angry at his parents and his brother, but as he lived out hisgrudge, he exiled himself from his family—truly despising his birthright. His story

challenges us to examine our own attitudes toward our families. Bitter feelings canrun deep in families, and the wounds we receive can be heart-rending. How we respond to thosehurts, however, is up to us. Rebekah and Isaac’s rejection of Esau’s wives may have been motivatedby the cultural perspectives of the day, but their attitudes are not exemplary. The overall messageof the Bible is compassion toward outsiders. Today’s text invites us to examine our own attitudestoward others.

A Way to End

5Bible Background

A Crafty SuitorSibling rivalry is something

most of us experience if wegrow up with brothers or sisters.

Generally speaking, such rivalry disap-pears—or at least lessens—once we moveaway and begin our adult lives.Unfortunately, two Hebrew sisters did nothave that luxury. Victims of a ruse perpe-trated by their greedy father, Leah andRachel married the same man and lived inconstant rivalry with one another. Leahwas desperate for her husband’s love, andRachel was desperate for a child of herown.

Jacob had tricked his father, Isaac,into giving him the patriarchal blessingthat was meant for his older brother,Esau. Fearing Esau’s revenge, Jacob soonleft his home and family behind, eventu-ally arriving in Haran in northernMesopotamia, the land of his ancestors.Upon arriving at the local well, Jacobinquired about his uncle Laban anddiscovered that his daughter Rachel wason her way to water the sheep. Jacobrolled the stone away from the mouth ofthe well for Rachel and, after introducinghimself, was invited by Laban to stay athis house (Gen 29:1-14).

A Devious Father-in-lawLaban (who, as it turns out, was a ruth-less, wheedling businessman, Gen

30:25-34; 31:32-42), offered to pay Jacobwages for serving as one of his shepherds.To prepare us for Jacob’s response, thenarrator interjects a brief description ofLaban’s two daughters. The eldest is Leah,and she is described as having rakkot eyes.The Hebrew word can be translatedseveral different ways, as demonstrated bythe variances in English translations:“weak” (NIV, NASB, ESV, RSV); “delicate”(NKJV, HCSB); or “lovely” (NRSV),amongst others. Because the word canhave positive or negative connotations, itis unclear whether the narrator’s descrip-tion of Leah’s eyes is meant to implybeauty or ugliness. Many translationsassume the latter, perhaps hoping to offersome justification for Jacob’s hatred ofLeah and love for Rachel. It is equallyplausible, however, that Leah is describedpositively, with pretty eyes. By contrast,Rachel is depicted as “beautiful of formand beautiful of appearance” (writer’stranslation). While both women may havebeen beautiful, the Hebrew syntax seemsto indicate a contrast between them:Rachel is the more beautiful of the two.

Because Jacob loved Rachel, hedeclared that he would serve Laban sevenyears for the right to marry her. Jacob hadfled from Canaan with nothing; his laborwould stand in the place of the brideprice he could not pay. In fact, he wasapparently offering an impressive gift.According to Deuteronomy 22:29, themaximum bride price (Hebrew, mohar)

Lesson Teaching Guide

LEAH AND RACHEL:SISTERS AND RIVALS

Genesis 29:15-30

was fifty shekels. Considering that aman’s monthly labor would have earnedhim around one shekel per month, Jacobwas offering well over the maximumamount (Wenham, 235). In a rare andpoignant expression of emotion, thenarrator declares that the seven yearsseemed like a few days because of Jacob’slove for Rachel. At the completion of theseven years, Jacob rightfully demandedhis bride, and the wedding arrangementswere made.

Antagonistic SistersUnfortunately, the Bible does not offerany detailed descriptions of marriageceremonies or rituals. What we do knowis reconstructed from a small number ofpassages. Hebrew weddings were typicallyweek-long affairs, permeated with feast-ing, drinking, and joyous celebration(Gen 29:27-28; Judg 14:10, 15; see John2:1-11). The bride was adorned withjewelry (Isa 49:18; Jer 2:32), and thegroom wore a garland (Isa 61:10). Therewas likely a wedding procession (Song3:6-11). Central to the ceremony was thewedding tent, into which the bride andgroom entered to consummate theirunion (Ps 19:5; Joel 2:16). At Jacob’swedding everything seemed perfectly inorder. Laban gathered the men, prepareda feast, and brought Jacob his bride. Butthe morning light exposed a shockingbetrayal expressed succinctly in the origi-nal Hebrew: “Look! It’s Leah!” Exactlyhow Laban successfully executed this wifeswap is unclear. Perhaps it was so darkJacob could not see the bride’s face—andone must wonder whether Jacob was theone with weak eyes! Perhaps Leah wasveiled. Perhaps Jacob had drunk himselfinto oblivion. The narrator only tells usthat Laban brought Leah to Jacob in theevening and that Jacob had sex with her,discovering the truth the next morning.

Being on the receiving end of deceitdid not suit Jacob. Angry, he demanded toknow how Laban could do such a thing.With an air of contrived innocence, Labanreplied that it was not customary in their

place to marry the younger daughter offbefore the older—a detail he neglected totell Jacob earlier. True or not, Laban’sexplanation may also have been a looselyveiled taunt at Jacob who had usurped hisolder brother’s place (Wenham, 236-37).Laban then pacified Jacob’s anger by offer-ing Rachel as well, for a price. “Completethe week of this one,” he offers, “and wewill give you the other also in return forserving me another seven years” (29:27).With no other recourse, Jacob complied.

24 Lesson 5

I. Jacob’s Wages (29:15-19)A. Laban’s Offer: What Shall Your Wages

Be? (v. 15)B. Interlude: Laban’s Daughters

(vv. 16-17)1. Leah, the Elder; Rachel, the Younger

(v. 16)2. Description of Leah (v. 17a)3. Description of Rachel (v. 17b)

C. Jacob’s Offer: Serve Seven Years forRachel (v. 18)

D. Laban’s Agreement (v. 19)

II. Jacob’s Labor of Love (29:20-21)A. Seven Years Are Like a Few Days (v. 20)B. Jacob’s Demand (v. 21)

III. My Big Fat Hebrew Wedding: Part I(29:22-27)

A. Preparations (v. 22)B. Laban’s Ruse (vv. 23-24)C. Jacob’s Shock and Rebuke of Laban

(v. 25)D. Laban’s Explanation and Offer

(vv. 26-27)

IV. My Big Fat Hebrew Wedding: Part II(29:28-30)

A. Rachel Given as a Wife (vv. 28-29)B. Jacob’s Love and Labor (v. 30)

1. Jacob loved Rachel more than Leah(v. 30a)

2. Jacob labored another seven yearsfor Laban (v. 30b)

❍ Desperate HousewivesSelect a brief segment (a relatively tameone!) from the show Desperate Housewives(or a similar show) to view in class. Or, goto the web site (http://abc.go.com/prime-time/desperate/recaps/) or a televisionprogram guide and pick an episodesynopsis to read to your class.

Rachel and Leah could be described asdesperate housewives. Married to thesame man, they lived in constant rivalrywith one another, competing for the loveof their mutual husband.

❍ SistersIn the classic movie White Christmas, twosisters, played by Rosemary Clooney andVera-Ellen, sing about being sisters. Theydescribe their love for one another andswear their undying loyalty. They alsowarn one another, “Sister, don’t comebetween me and my man!” Show a clip ofthis scene, play a recording of the song, orprint out the lyrics for the class to read.

While the song “Sisters” depicts agood-natured sibling rivalry, the sisterswe’re considering today battled on a muchmore serious level. Both sisters couldclaim that the other had “come betweenme and my man.” They engaged in a life-long struggle for approval that cost bothof them greatly.

❍ My Big Fat Hebrew WeddingDecorate the classroom as you might for awedding reception. Purchase an inexpen-sive round frosted cake and put a caketopper on it, fix punch, buy some inexpen-sive flowers, etc. Enlist other classmembers to help with the preparations.Someone adept with computers will beable to prepare mock wedding invitationsto the wedding of Jacob to Rachel(perhaps with Rachel’s name crossed outand Leah’s inserted!).

The story of Rachel and Leah’s marriage to Jacob is romantic, humorous, and tragicat the same time. Hearing that Jacob loved Rachel so much that seven years seemedlike a day warms our hearts. Watching Jacob have the tables turned on him is satis-

fyingly funny. Witnessing Leah’s fruitless struggle to gain Jacob’s approval and Rachel’s deadlydesire for more children is tragic. This passage calls us to ask, “What am I willing to do forapproval?”

A Way to Begin

Teaching Guide 25

The narrative concludes with a heart-rending revelation: Jacob loved Rachel morethan Leah. Jacob’s favoritism of Rachel over Leah engendered intense rivalry betweenthe two sisters. Leah, who was aware of her husband’s hatred toward her (29:32), fruit-lessly sought Jacob’s favor by producing children for him (29:32-34; 30:20). Rachel, whoenjoyed Jacob’s love, was cursed with infertility (29:31). Desperation led both women togive Jacob concubines (30:3, 9) and to fight over Jacob’s nighttime visits (30:14-16). Inthe ensuing baby wars, as the ancestors of the twelve tribes of Israel were conceived,Leah remained unloved. Her sons and only daughter were ostracized and neglected byJacob (see Gen 34). And though Rachel eventually gave birth to Joseph (30:23-24), shewas not satisfied. In the very act of naming Joseph, whose name means “he adds,”Rachel expressed her wish for another child, “May the Lord add to me another son”(Frymer-Kensky, 140). Rachel got her wish, but her heart’s desire resulted in her deathas she gave birth to Benjamin (35:17).

❍ The Wedding PartySummarize the story leading up to today’spassage. Ask a volunteer to read Genesis29:15-30. Discuss each member of the“wedding party” (Laban, Jacob, Leah, andRachel) in turn.

Say, “The brides and groom wanted to have wedding portraits done.Unfortunately, there were no photogra-phers in biblical times, so they have askedus to paint their portraits with words.”

List characteristics defining each char-acter on the board. Discuss as many of thefollowing questions as appropriate.

Questions➤ Did Laban have ulterior motives when

he offered to pay Jacob wages? If so,what were they? Did he already know ofJacob’s love for Rachel?

➤ How do you imagine Leah and Rachel’sphysical appearance? Have you alwaysthought of Leah as the ugly one andRachel as the pretty one? Why (or whynot)?

➤ What was Laban’s purpose in the wife-swap? How did giving Leah instead ofRachel to Jacob benefit Laban?

➤ Why was Jacob unable to recognizeLeah until morning?

➤ Where was Rachel on Jacob and Leah’swedding night?

➤ Why didn’t Laban tell Jacob about thecustom of marrying the eldest daugh-ter first?

➤ Put yourself in Leah’s place. Howwould all these events make you feel?

➤ Put yourself in Rachel’s place. Howwould you respond to the events?

❍ The Approval GameRead Genesis 29:15-30, then play the“Approval Game”: Assign someone asscorekeeper, asking him or her to maketwo columns on the board, one for Leahand one for Rachel. Have the class to readthrough the passage again and thencontinue through the end of chapter 30,one verse at a time. Assign points to Leahor Rachel using the following values:

➤ 2 points for each child she bears➤ 1 point for each child her slave woman

bears for her➤ 10-point “love bonus” each time the

text says Jacob loved her

Evaluate the “score.” Observe that Leahwas unable to win Jacob’s love, no matterhow many babies she had. The lessonthrough Leah is that approval cannot bebought. Rachel already had Jacob’s love,but spent her life wanting more babies.The lesson through Rachel is that thedesire for approval can never be fullysatisfied.

A Way to Explore Scripture How horrible it must have been for Leah and Rachel to be married to the same man!They were sisters turned into rivals by their father’s trickery. Their weddings were

spoiled by Laban’s deceptions, and they found themselves fighting over whose wombwas better. The account depicts broken relationships, wounded spirits, and desperate ploys forattention. As you study this passage, focus on the elements in the story that will speak most tothe life situation of your members.

26 Lesson 5

❍ The Honeymoon Is OverFrom the first wedding day on, Jacob,Leah, and Rachel’s lives were filled withjealousy and strife. Fighting over theirmutual husband, Leah and Rachel triedto compensate for their unhappiness bystriking out at each other and competingfor his attention.

Ask class members to think about oneof their more stressful relationships.Suggest they silently consider the follow-ing questions:

Questions➤ What makes this relationship stressful? ➤ How do I contribute to the tensions in

the relationship? How does the otherperson?

➤ Am I compensating for my unhappi-ness in the relationship in some way? Ifso, how?

➤ Am I seeking the approval of the otherperson and diminishing myself in theprocess?

➤ What do I need to do to make this rela-tionship healthier?

Encourage class members to committhemselves to taking a first step towardhealing this week.

❍ Peer Pressure MonitorEven as adults, we face peer pressure.Discuss the things adults do to gain theapproval of our peers.

Distribute copies of page 32, titled“Peer Pressure Monitor.” Have the classfill out the questionnaire for their owninsight, not for sharing with others. Trueacceptance cannot be found in humaninstitutions or relationships. The Onewhose approval we should be seeking hasalready accepted us through Jesus Christ.We can do nothing, say nothing, or thinknothing that will cause God to love us oraccept us more. We are already fully loved.

ResourcesTikva Frymer-Kensky, “Rachel,” Women in Scripture,ed. Carol Meyers (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 2001).

Gordon Wenham, Genesis 16-50, Word BiblicalCommentary (Dallas: Word, 1994).

Even after giving birth to six sons and a daughter, Leah never won Jacob’s love. Sheexperienced rejection from the day she married him to the day she died. Jacob also

neglected her sons in favor of Rachel’s firstborn, Joseph. Rachel fared better in thesense that at least she had the love of her husband—but she still had to share him. She spent herdays seeking the one thing that eluded her: a child. When one came she was not satisfied and imme-diately wanted another. Her wish led to her death. We can discover something about our ownfailing relationships by observing Jacob, Leah, and Rachel’s. We can also evaluate our tendencyto strive for the elusive approval of others.

A Way to End

Teaching Guide 27

NAMES OF GODElTranslation: “God”The most basic name for God used in manyancient cultures.

ElohimTranslation: “God”The form in Hebrew is plural, and thus is some-times to be translated “gods,” but in reference tothe God of Israel the term is usually considered tobe a plural of majesty emphasizing the greatnessor majesty of God. When Elohim is used of God,the verb forms are always in the singular.

YHWH (Yahweh)Translation: Usually rendered “LORD” in Englishtranslations The translation of the name is based on Exodus3:14, where God says, “I am who I am.” Thus,YHWH (thought to be a form of the verb hayah,“to be”) could be translated “I am.” However, thetenses of the verb “to be” in Exodus 3:14 can betranslated in a variety of ways. No one reallyknows with certainty how the name should betranslated or its exact relationship with the verb“to be.”

YHWH is considered God’s personal nameand, as such, the Jews view it as the most sacredname of God. For centuries, religious Jews haverefused to pronounce the name out loud, sincemispronouncing it would desecrate it. Thus, theysubstitute “Adonai” for “YHWH” when reading theHebrew text aloud.

AdonaiTranslation: “Lord”The Hebrew term is used also of human beingsand is translated “lord” or “master.”

El-roi (Gen. 16:13) Translation: “The God who sees” or “the God whosees me”The name is only used once in the Hebrew Bible,but it is interesting because it was bestowed byHagar. After her encounter with the angel in thewilderness, Hagar called God “El-roi” because God

saw her needs and because she had a face-to-faceencounter with God and yet did not die.

El Shaddai (Gen. 17:1) Translation: Popularly translated “God Almighty.”Other possibilities include: “God of the mountain,”“Sufficient God,” or “Destroyer God”God reveals this name in Genesis 17 while institut-ing circumcision as a sign of the covenant. Hereand elsewhere in Genesis, the name appears to beassociated with promises of fertility and increase.

El Elyon (Gen. 14:18, 19-20) Translation: “God most high”Melchizedek is referred to as a priest of El Elyon,and when he blessed Abram, he called God by thisname.

El Olam (Gen. 21:33) Translation: “Eternal God”After Abraham and Abimelech made a treaty withone another after a dispute over a well, Abrahamplanted a tree at Beersheba and called uponYHWH as Eternal God.

YHWH Yireh (Gen. 22:14) Translation: “Yahweh will provide”Abraham called the mountain where he went tosacrifice Isaac “Yahweh Yireh” because Godprovided a ram as a substitute sacrifice.

El Rachum we-Chanun (Exod 34:6) Translation: “God of compassion and mercy”In Exodus 34:6-7, God is revealed to Moses as aGod of compassion, slow to anger and abundantin loving-kindness—but at the same time a God ofjustice. This name appears in numerous passagesthroughout the Old Testament (Num 14:18, Joel2:13; Jon 4:2; Pss 86:15; 103:8; 145:8; Neh 9:17).

YHWH Sabaoth (1 Sam 1:3)Translation: “YHWH of hosts” or “YHWH ofarmies”Refers to YHWH as the commander of heaven’sangelic armies.

TRUSTING GOD

Things I Am Afraid toTrust God With

How I Am Paralyzedinto Inaction Joys I May

Be Denying MyselfWhat First Step Can I

Take to Action?

Example:My fear of failure.

I tend to avoid new situationsand I don’t take risks.

• Experiencing new things I mightreally like• The possibility of success• New experiences from which Ican learn even if I don’t succeed.

• Choose one of my lesser fears,such as learning a foreign lan-guage, and enroll in acommunity college course. • Then choose one of my greaterfears, such as speaking to myboss about a raise, and schedulean appointment to talk withhim/her.

POINT OF VIEWRebekahAs you retell the story from Rebekah’s perspective, use the following questions to help you in your formula-tion. Remember to think in the first person.

How old are you? What were your first impressions of the stranger at the well? Why did youoffer to water his camels? Are you an animal lover? How long did it take you to draw water forten thirsty camels? How did you react when the servant put a ring on your nose (v. 47)? Didyour father ever tell you about Abraham? If so, what did he say about his uncle who left Haranat the command of God? Are you excited about marrying a man from a distant land? Scared?Glad to get away from your family? How do you feel about your brother and father decidingyour future? Will you miss your mother?

LabanAs you retell the story from Laban’s perspective, use the following questions to help you in your formulation.Remember to think in the first person. For additional insight, see Genesis 24:29-32.

What do you think of your sister, Rebekah? When she told you about the stranger at the well,what was your first reaction? How impressed were you by all his fine gifts? What did you thinkabout the stranger’s account? Why did you get involved in the marital negotiations? Is itbecause Bethuel is elderly and unable to barter well? Or is it customary for brothers to assist inmaking such decisions? Are you concerned about your sister’s well being as you send her to livein Canaan? Why did you and your mother try to convince the servant to let Rebekah stay tenmore days? Did you find it hard to say goodbye? Were you hoping if you delayed him, the ser-vant would offer more presents? Was Rebekah hesitant to go? After Rebekah left, did yourmother grieve? Did you comfort her?

IsaacAs you retell the story from Isaac’s perspective, use the following questions to help you in your formulation.Remember to think in the first person. For additional insight, see Genesis 24:62-67.

You’re forty years old now. Why have you waited so long to get married? Did you ever ask yourfather if you could marry a Canaanite woman? How do you feel about the fact that your fatherwon’t let you go to Haran to find your own wife? Why do you think he’s unwilling to let you go?Did you try to convince him to let you go? Why (why not)? Do you trust the servant to find youa good woman? What would you have done if he had returned with a woman you couldn’tstand? When you first laid eyes on Rebekah, what did you think? What was your impression ofthe servant’s account of how he found her? How did Rebekah’s arrival in your life give you com-fort after your mother’s death? Considering how Rebekah helped deceive you into giving Jacobyour blessing (Gen 27), do you still think the servant made the right choice? Why (why not)?

FAMILY FEUD

Isaac and Rebekah (Gen 26:34-35; 27:46–28:3; 28:6-9)Read the assigned texts and identify the issues Isaac and Rebekah are upset about. Look for howIsaac and Rebekah addressed their problems and the results of their “solution.” Evaluate thevalidity of Isaac and Rebekah’s grievances and suggest ways they could have addressed theirproblems in a kinder way.

• Our Grievances:• How We Addressed Our Grievances:• The Validity of Our Grievances:• How We Could Have Resolved Our Problem More Amicably:

Jacob (Gen 27:1-29; 27:41; 28:1-5)(Note that Isaac had planned to bless only Esau. Fathers typically gave a blessing to all their sons [see Gen 49].)

Read the assigned texts and identify the issues Jacob was upset about. Look for how Jacobaddressed his problems and the results of his “solution.” Evaluate the validity of Jacob’s grievancesand suggest ways he could have addressed his problems in a kinder way.

• My Grievances:• How I Addressed My Grievances:• The Validity of My Grievances:• How I Could Have Resolved My Problem More Amicably:

Esau (Gen 27:30-41; 28:6-9; 36:1-8)Read the assigned texts and identify the issues Esau was upset about. Look for how Esau addressedhis problems and the results of his “solution.” Evaluate the validity of Esau’s grievances and suggestways he could have addressed his problems in a kinder way.

• My Grievances:• How I Addressed My Grievances:• The Validity of My Grievances:• How I Could Have Resolved My Problem More Amicably:

PEER PRESSURE MONITORRead the following statements and circle the appropriate number indicating your agreement ordisagreement. Write this number in the far right column. Total the numbers to determine your“peer pressure.” The higher the number, the higher your need for others’ approval.

There is no remedy for high peer pressure except for resting in God’s unconditional love for you.

Disagree Agree Strongly Agree Score

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

I care what other people think about me.

I am easily hurt by others.

I have difficulty saying “no” to others.

I am easily swayed by others’ opinions.

I take criticism personally.

I feel insecure about my abilities.

I need others’ praise to feelgood about my work.

I am very concerned aboutmy appearance.

I tend to compare myself witother people.

People tell me I’m too hardon myself.

I am a perfectionist.

I put things off because I neverfeelI can do a good enough job.

I tend to be highly critical of others.

I don’t speak my mind because I’m afraid I’ll offend somebody.

I am afraid to try new things, especiallythings I don’t think I’ll be good at.

Total