Scribbles 

California Writers Club — Central Coast Writers Branch centralcoastwriters.org

June 2018

 

On June 19 John Lescroart Twenty Years To Overnight Success John Lescroart wrote his first novel in his early 20s and continued writing through a music career and a series of day jobs, including ad director at a guitar magazine, house painter, and moving man. His breakthrough book came in 1994, when he was 41, shooting his family's $20,000 income of the previous year to an astounding $680,000 that year. He will talk about the road he traveled to make his dream come true. Lescroart is the author of twenty-seven novels, nineteen of which have been NY Times Bestsellers. Libraries Unlimited has named him among “The 100 Most Popular Thriller and Suspense Authors.” With sales of over twelve million copies, his books have been translated into twenty-two languages in more than seventy-five countries, and his short stories appear in many anthologies. Among his numerous awards, in 2016, the San Francisco Museum and Historical Society presented Lescroart with its Award of Merit to recognize the “intimate knowledge of San Francisco” portrayed in his novels.

  

 

Coming on July 17 Mark Coker 7 Trends Driving the Future of Authorship Smashwords Founder Mark Coker reveals seven publishing industry trends that are transforming the future of authorship. Learn how the power center in the publishing industry is shifting from publishers to writers, and how self-published authors now have the tools to out-sell and out-compete the large publishers. Learn how the playing field isn't just level—it's tilted to the indie author's advantage. Learn how to take full advantage of the amazing opportunities in book publishing today. Coker founded Smashwords in 2008 to make it fast, free and easy for any writer, anywhere in the world, to self-publish an ebook. Today, Smashwords has grown to become the world's largest distributor of self-published ebooks representing over 130,000 authors and small independent presses around the world who publish and distribute nearly 500,000 books with Smashwords. Mark is a contributing columnist for Publishers Weekly and the host of the popular SMART AUTHOR podcast.Mark blogs at http://blog.smashwords.com

WHAT’S INSIDE

Announcements 5-6

CCW President’s Letter 2

Contests and Conferences 9

If the Shoe Fits 10

Member Profile 7

Speaker Report 3

The Last Word 11

The Poetry Corner 8

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CCW President’s Letter By Laurie Sheehan

 

Taking Chances 

Early one morning, on our drive to work, John noticed a trash bag sitting on the curb. Not surprising, since it was trash day. However, taped to this bag was a sign, which read, “FREE – LANTERNS.” John whipped the car over to the side of the road, saying, “Hey! Did you see that? Free lanterns. Run back and get them.” Such an easy statement, such an easy task, and yet in a split second I experienced a cascade of thought and emotion. “What if someone were to see me?” (fear of humiliation, flash of panic), but also “How can I let something useful go to the landfill? (fear of waste, happiness at an opportunity). This all might seem slightly melodramatic for something so simple as “grab that bag next to the trash can,” but emotions come unbidden. It is what it is. Possibly because I was so often teased as a child I learned to avoid situations that provide others with opportunities to tease? You might not know this, but I’m incredibly shy. I dislike calling attention to myself. However, keeping a low profile doesn’t fit my daily life, and when I’m in front of a group I sometimes go overboard. In for a penny, in for a pound? But, this situation did make clear how often I have allowed myself to be hobbled by my own insecurities.

In this instance I did jump out, and I grabbed the bag. Just as I scooped it up a couple rounded the corner. Maybe just a little older than me, about 20 feet away, to-go coffee cups in hand, and looking right at me. I was busted—caught doing my first-world version of dumpster diving. I’m sure I had that deer-in-the-headlights look, but the man smiled and yelled, “Thank you.” Then he added, “My mom would be pleased.” I think I mumbled something about putting them to good use as I scuttled back to the truck. John opened the back, and I deposited the white plastic sack of varying sized paper lanterns. The couple started up the stairs of a house I now noticed was empty. Tarp-covered personal belongings crowded the overhanging front porch.

And, here’s where the story really begins. Almost immediately I created my own version of the tale, and here it is: This man’s mother passed away recently. He and his wife were there cleaning out the house, getting it ready to sell. They found a bag of paper lanterns a shelf in the garage. The man remembered that each year his mother would adorn the house for Feast of Lanterns; how the festive paper lights marked the beginning of summer, and how the house always seemed to be right in the middle of the festivities, as it faces Lovers Point. He had a momentary twinge of guilt as he made the decision to part with his mother’s beloved decorations, and that drove him to add the sign. He was truly pleased to see us gather up that bag, and he knew his mother would be happy, too.

John and I will sort through those lanterns, share with neighbors, and use some to decorate our house this July. I believe things can carry the essence their past, and I get the sense that these lanterns were loved. They brought smiles to the previous owner, and we’ll give them more opportunities to spread happiness. But, for the writer in me they have an additional meaning. Those lanterns provided me with reminder that overcoming fear and taking chances can open doors. I put myself in an uncomfortable position and the payoff was acknowledgement that, at heart, I’m a storyteller—as are we all.

Look around you every day. Involve yourself. Live earnestly and wisely in every moment that life offers.

And, until we meet again, happy writing! Laurie

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Speaker Report By Dorothy Vriend

  

Eat Your Vegetables—Know Your Publishing Rights  

When you finally get that book contract in your hands, read the fine print before you sign. Don’t be afraid to negotiate with your publisher, and when the signatures are finally on the document, find a safe place to keep it—somewhere you can find it ten or twenty years down the line. These were some basics from Brianna Schofield, copyright attorney and executive director of Author’s Alliance, a Berkeley non-profit organization representing authors’ interests. But Schofield had a lot more to say about copyright, fair use, publishing terms, and getting your rights back at our June meeting.

Copyright gives its owner exclusive reproduction rights, exclusive rights to prepare derivative works, and exclusive rights for performance or public display of the work. It lasts 70 years beyond the author’s life. Expired copyrights—those published pre-1923, and exempt material—become part of the public domain. Creative Commons licenses are a simple, standard way to grant copyright permissions for creative works, Schofield said. She also mentioned open access which can be beneficial in instances where you want to dedicate your work to the public domain.

Fair use is not always well understood, Schofield said, but is an issue that comes up in lawsuits. Some common factors in fair use cases are the purpose of use, the character of material used, the amount of material used and potential harm to the original market. Facts and plot structure cannot be copyrighted, and are therefore more likely to be considered fair use than creative aspects of the work, Schofield said.

As for publishing terms, some questions to consider when you are offered a contract are what rights you are giving away; what advances and royalties are being offered; what third party permissions are granted; what warranties and indemnities are listed, and whether the contract includes a reversion clause. Authors Alliance is releasing a guide to publication contracts later this year, complete with negotiating tips, Schofield said.

If your traditionally published book is no longer financially viable for the publisher, and out of print, you might want to consider getting your rights back, Schofield said. This is when you dig out your original contract, and check if you are eligible to revert rights under its terms. In the absence of a contractual clause, you can still negotiate reversion rights with your publishers, Schofield said.

For more information. check out “resources” at authorsalliance.org.

[Ed.—Heartfelt thanks to Dorothy Vriend for her many years of excellent service as Program Chair! ]

Speaker Brianna Schofield 5-minute reader Christine Sleeter Dorothy Vriend hands off the Program Chairmanship to Nancy Middleton

Be like Jennifer Schmidt! Renew your membership today!

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Announcements

Welcome to our new CCW members: Patti Clarke, Elena Nezhinsky, Katie Carlier, and Ron Wormser Lorraine Comaner, welcome a third time , with high hopes that your name is finally spelled correctly!

Member Congratulations Congratulations are in order for Patrick Whitehurst, whose new book The Pacific Grove Museum of Natural History has been published by Arcadia Publishing, as part of their Images of America series.

June Elections at the General Meeting

At the May meeting, Jason Warburg presented the slate of nominees for President, Vice-President, Treasurer, and Secretary for the upcoming year. Our current elected members (Laurie Sheehan, Sharon Law Tucker, Clarissa Conn, and Joyce Krieg) all agreed to stay on another year. All members in good standing present at the June meeting will be asked to vote on the four elected positions. Nominations will also be taken from the floor.

CCW Members Can Ride in the 4th of July Parade Submitted by Nancy Swing and Russell Sunshine sunswing44@gmail.com

The CCW photo from Monterey's 4th of July Parade two years ago is a reminder not everyone can march a mile, even on the flat. (The route takes about an hour.) This year, we'll have two small convertibles for those who need to ride. Please let us know if that's you by writing to the email address above.

At the last meeting, 20 members expressed preliminary interest in joining the parade. We have to file our application by 30 May, so if you weren't at the meeting and would like to march, kindly write to the same email address.

Some specifics:

● Assembly at 9:30 for 10:00 start. ● Parade organizers ask that marchers wear either patriotic or club attire. ● We'll be carrying our banner and signs as we always do. ● Leslie Patiño has graciously offered to host marchers' food and fun

afterwards. ● We'll be sending emails with more details to marchers.

We've been asked what those outfit guidelines mean. Club attire is CCW t-shirts; if you got 'em, sport 'em. Patriotic costumes can be just about anything that fills the bill: red, white and blue; your old girl scout uniform; an Uncle Sam hat perched on your noggin. We'll again give a prize for best costume—dazzle us with your creativity!

The PG Parade was a lot of fun, and our participation in Monterey's 4th of July sounds like it's going to be even better.

Local Authors Book Fest—”Meet an Author” The Elks Lodge and Central Coast Writers are co-sponsoring “Meet an Author,” a book festival featuring local authors, including you! Still in the planning stage, the event will allow approximately 30-50 authors to share tables and sell their books. There is a nominal charge of $10 per author for table space, and free admission for attendees. Sunday, July 15, 2:00–5:00 pm., Monterey Elks Lodge, 150 Mar Vista Drive, Monterey. For further information, contact Margie McCurry at margiemccurry@gmail.com. Facebook page: facebook.com/Meetanauthor/

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Announcements (continued) 

Meet the Author at Pacific Grove Library Submitted by Jennifer Schmidt

After nearly losing his 65’ wooden schooner in a large Alaskan tide, writer, sailor, and surfer Jonathan White, author of Tides, The Science and Spirit of the Ocean vowed to understand the tide. With photos, stories, and short readings, he takes us on an enthralling journey into the workings of the tide. Tuesday, June 26th, 7:30–9 p.m. Pacific Grove Library.

A June Debut for Our Lit Review Submitted by Joyce Krieg

If there’s one question I get asked more than any other here at CWC World Headquarters, it’s this: When is the Literary Review coming out? And its corollary: When will we know whether our work has been accepted? After consultation with Managing Editors Elisabeth Tuck and Scott Evans, and Graphic Designer Rusty LaGrange, I can say with reasonable confidence that the magazine will be in our members’ mailboxes by end of June, as well as all contributors being notified as to the status of their submissions.

We’ve got an entire new team working on the Literary Review this year, and I want to acknowledge the countless hours of work that Elisabeth and Scott have already contributed to this project. A huge shout-out goes to Rusty LaGrange for stepping in take on the graphic design and layout. She’s already done more than her share in editing The Bulletin and I am very grateful that she was willing to add this to her already full plate.

Your Interview with Access Monterey’s Artivism Submitted by Patricia Hamilton

CCW Member King Grossman is the emcee for Access Monterey’s Artivism , featuring interviews with local writers and other artists in Monterey County. Interviews take place at Access Monterey in Heritage Harbor at Fisherman’s Wharf in Monterey. Please contact King at 432-295-2001 or by email at kinggrossman@earthlink.net to arrange for your interview. You’ll receive a link to the interview that you can post on your blog, website, and other social media accounts. There is no charge for this service to the literary community.

Life in Pacific Grove Book#2 Submitted by Patricia Hamilton

Keepers of Our Culture membership in Main Street Writers Movement looks to be an exciting adjunct to the Stories of America and Stories of Mexico (expat/international communities) book series, both to be fully launched in 2019 with four how-to books enabling other communities to share personal stories and bring the community closer as they experience the power of storytelling. Another very interesting development, I invited a new tenant in my office building, Brad Morris, a principal AI specialist, to write his PG story—for the upcoming "Life in Pacific Grove Book#2"—using storytelling as an integral component of communal well being, because it is hardwired in our DNA. (He studies DNA personality traits as part of his AI research.) As a little hobby, he's working to create a small machine that will emit a sound to shoo noisy seagulls from mating on the ledge outside his second story office window. This will be welcome news for everyone in the community! Thanks to those who have contributed to Book#2. (I've commissioned 20 local writers to write 5000 words each on interesting PG topics, and secured a local photographer for color photos this time.) Editor Joyce Krieg supplied the subtitle for this edition: "Deeper Community Connections." Deadline to submit YOUR story is July 1 (go to lifeinpacificgrove.com to submit or send as a Word.doc attachment to lifeinpacificgrove@gmail.com). "Life in Pacific Grove Book#2" to be launched on Indie Author Day, sponsored by the PG Library, 1–5 pm, on October 13, 2018. Co-sponsored by Central Coast Writers. Free and open to all writers—and the public.

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Announcements (continued) 

Diane Hinds Workshop

Submitted by Maria Skyttä and Laurie Sheehan PR expert Diane M. Hinds was the featured presenter to an enthusiastic group at the CCW workshop on March 10. Diane spoke on the topic of “How to promote your book,” giving us practical and hands-on advice on all things promoting, such as planning and timing the release of your book, finding your message and target audience, and even feedback on participants websites and social media. Participants left the information-packed workshop with Diane’s booklets and an opportunity to arrange 15 minutes of private consultation with Diane. Laurie notes: Diane Hinds manner is open and inviting, she’s approachable and puts the crowd at ease. She talked about how to achieve beneficial PR for the author or the work without a large outlay of cash. She talked about social media, but that wasn’t all. The further she got into her slide deck, the more I saw an unfurling of innovation—she used very specific authors/public figures, using myriad PR platforms.

Here are some takeaways: ● Face it: Indie authors face a stigma because they are not traditionally published—don’t let that hinder you in your path to PR. ● We all already know how to be our own champions, and we already know how to negotiate. (For example, the first time we

asked our parents for money—interesting to see an unfolding of the negotiation process in people as young as 4 years old.) ● The difference between Public Relations and Advertising—Public Relations is about controlling the message the goes out. ● Ways to get yourself nearly free PR:

● Book reviews ● Articles in periodicals (that make sense to your type of writing) ● Articles in local papers

● Make sure your website is kept up to date, relevant, and as professional as possible. We viewed several of the attendees’ websites with Diane commenting on what she thought was great and what could be improved.

● Press releases are important. They need to be 12-point font, 1.5 line spaced, and avoid jargon; the first paragraph is the most important—IT NEEDS TO CONTAIN YOUR MESSAGE.

● THE MESSAGE—Hinds spent most of the first hour talking about the MESSAGE, basically the elevator pitch. It’s what your work is about. If someone says “tell me about your book,” this is what you say.

● She used specific examples of good PR campaigns (like the ice bucket ALS Challenge—not as adaptable to us, but still an excellent example of PR gone viral)

● Avoid doing telephone interviews if possible. If someone says “I’d like to do a telephone interview for my radio show,” tell them you’ll come to them if they are close enough.

● She uses “Google Alerts,” so that anytime her name or message is used online, she is alerted. ● Any time she is alerted, and she sees a great bit of PR, she contacts the organization that posted the article for a copy. ● Build contacts and keep all contacts in a spreadsheet. Don’t let opportunities pass!

We can find her at: @Diane_Hinds facebook.com/dianemhindsPR TheEntertainmentBureau.co.uk #Meet Diane

The Jeffrey Deaver/Mystery Writers of America Workshop Submitted by Joyce Krieg

What I Liked: Jeffrey Deaver’s workshop—funny, well organized, decent presentation skills, packed with information, fast-paced. Not So Much: He had to race through the last one-third of his material. Stuffy, uninspiring. dingy meeting room in downtown Oakland with horrible hard folding chairs. Highlights from my notes:

● “Write the book you want to read.” ● Rembrandt, Shakespeare and Mozart all “sold out:” created works of genius because they were being paid to do it. ● Our goal as writers of fiction: “Create characters that readers love and put them in the pressure cooker of conflict.” ● He creates very detailed outlines. It starts with just one idea, which he puts on a Post-It on a board, adding more Post-Its

as more ideas arise. Out of this he creates an outline —usually around 50 pages—before he starts writing. ● "Three verbs walked into a bar. It was a tense situation." ● Think short paragraphs and short chapters. “We are living in a sound bite era.” ● Quoting Terry Pratchett: “Writers block was invented by people in California who couldn't write.” ● “Gore is icky, suspense is good. Gore is easy, suspense is hard.” ● Every sentence must further the plot or enhance understanding of the character—or add a sprinkle of mood or tone. ● The Snoopy Rule: Do not open a book with a description of the weather. ● Never let your characters control your story. "If they do, kill them!"

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Member Profile By Michelle Smith

 

“Pay Now or Pay Later” Frank R. Southers 

For trial lawyer and English major Frank Southers, author of several articles on topics such as Evidence, Torts, Grievance Law, and Medical Malpractice, writing has long been an integral part of his existence. Raised in San Antonio, Texas, Frank earned a B.A. in English from St. Mary’s University and a law degree from St. Mary’s School of Law, both at age twenty-two. His first published work was a legal treatise on Texas Workers’ Compensation Law he coauthored in 1978. Frank served as an Adjunct Professor of Law for twenty years, Chair of the Litigation Section of the State Bar of Texas, and President of the San Antonio Chapter of the American Board of Trial Advocates. Late in his legal career, he was honored with the title “Super Lawyer” by Texas Monthly magazine. Since 2004, Frank, who also lived in Austin for ten years, has morphed into a fiction writer. As one might surmise, and as evident in his book titles, his genre is legal fiction. He credits two professors from St. Mary’s University for inspiring him to pursue his writing ambitions. His debut novel, The Grievance Committee—Book One, was followed by A Serious Mistake; To Get Even, a Novel; Lawyer Magic; and Senator White. Inspired by the likes of John Grisham, Scott Turow, and Cormac McCarthy, Frank, who belonged to two Texas writing groups, hopes to “educate, entertain, and offer a treat to the reader’s intellect.” In early 2017, a month after he and his wife, Linda, relocated to Carmel-by-the-Sea (which, he swears, had nothing to do with witness protection), he joined CCW. Frank prefers to write on a PC in his home office after breakfast and for an hour or two after lunch. When it comes to offering words of wisdom to fellow writers, he can’t help putting on his legal hat. “My advice to all aspiring writers is, before you sign any contract with a literary agent or publisher, hire a lawyer to advise you of the ups and downs in either contract. Better to pay a lawyer now,” he warns, “than to pay later to extricate you from a bad deal.” Additionally, he believes that “perseverance will get you to the finish line.” Frank has completed his first historical legal fiction novel titled Escape from Apartheid , now available on Amazon.com. His website can be found at www.southers.com. All five of his novels are available in paperback and kindle at Amazon.com or on order from your favorite bookseller.

Michelle Smith’s articles have been published in a variety of magazines. Her website is theebonyquill.com .

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The Poetry Corner

By Nancy Jacobs

William Butler Yeats

William Butler Yeats is an outstanding poet of the 20th Century. He said, “Education is not the filling of a pail but the lighting of a fire.” It should be memorized by all who love learning. Yeats was born to John Butler Yeats and Susan Pollexfen on June 13, 1865. Yeats spent part of his young life in County Sligo, Ireland. The family moved to England to give support to their father's efforts to become an artist. In 1877, Yeats was admitted to Godolphin School in England where he stayed for four years. He started writing poetry at 17. He also attended the Metropolitan School of Art. At Dublin's Erasmus High School, he met many artists and writers who strongly influenced his writing. Yeats first published work was a poem and an essay titled “The Poetry of Sir Samuel Ferguson,” published in the Dublin University Review .

Mysticism, spiritualism, occultism, and astrology were Yeats' lifelong interests. He was also fascinated by Irish legends. The critics, it is safe to say, considered his interest in these things frivolous, and thought his early writing conventional. Despite the critics, Yeats continued and founded the Rhymers’ Club. He won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1923. Reportedly, he won the Nobel Prize because he wrote “inspired poetry, which in a highly artistic form gives expression to the spirit of a whole nation.” However, his best works were written after he won the Nobel Prize, such as “The Tower,” “The Winding Stair,” and other poems written in 1928 and 1929. He wrote “Isle of Statues” and “The Wandering of Oisin,” a long poem based on the lyrics of the Fenian Cycle and Irish Mythology. The latter is about the appeal of life in contemplation versus the appeal of life in action. He will also be remembered for volunteering to establish The Abbey Theater.

Yeats' personal life was fraught with romances that never fit. In one, Maud Gonne, an heiress, rejected his proposals of marriage three times. This romance went back and forth until he finally married Georgie Hyde Lees in 1916. They had two children, Anne and

 

Michael. They stayed married to the end even though in his later years Yeats became a womanizer. The background in Ireland was a time of political turmoil; the Protestants were rising. Yeats’ whole family supported the Protestants. Politically speaking, Yeats was an Irish Nationalist at heart. He was appointed Senator for the Irish Free State in 1922.

Yeats became a very successful writer and was able to pay all of his bills and his father's. One of his last works was “A Vision” (1925). In 1936 he became editor of The Oxford Book of Modern Verse. Yeats instructed his wife that if he were to die she was to bury him quickly in France and then move him to Sligo, Ireland. She did exactly as he wanted when he died on June 28, 1939.

The Second Coming By William Butler Yeats

Turning and turning in the widening gyre The falcon cannot hear the falconer; Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold; Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world, The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere The ceremony of innocence is drowned; The best lack all conviction, while the worst Are full of passionate intensity. Surely some revelation is at hand; Surely the Second Coming is at hand. The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert A shape with lion body and the head of a man, A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun, Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds. The darkness drops again; but now I know That twenty centuries of stony sleep Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle, And what rough beast, its hour come round at last, Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

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Contests and Conferences By Patricia Watson

CONTESTS Summer 2018 LAR Literary Awards, Flash Fiction, Non-Fiction and Fiction Story or Essay, or Poetry Deadline: June 30, 2018 Entry Fee: $20.00 per entry Website: losangelesreview.org/awards Judges: Douglas Manuel–Poetry, Doug Lawson–Fiction, Ron Koertge–Flash Fiction, Sarah Cannon–Non-Fiction Prizes: $1000 honorarium and publication via LAR Online and in the best-of print edition of the Los Angeles Review to be released in Spring 2019. Guidelines: Submit up to three unpublished poems of no more than 50 lines each, an unpublished short story or essay of up to 2,500 words, or a piece of unpublished flash fiction of up to 500 words. Simultaneous submissions allowed. See website for complete guidelines.

The Literary Taxidermy Short Story Competition Deadline: June 4, 2018 Entry Fee: $10.00 (Voluntary fee so as not to limit entries from authors who can't afford fees. If entrant doesn't pay, please do other contributions, such as sharing the contest details on social media.) Website: literarytaxidermy.com Prizes: 1st: $500 per author category, publication in Literary Taxidermy Anthology plus free copy of paperback anthology. Runner up : $50.00 plus publication in anthology and copy. Honorable Mentions: Name listed on special page of paperback edition of the anthology. Judges: Distinguished judges from many genres. See website. Guidelines: See website for full details and word counts. Entrants are to write a short story starting and ending with the first and last lines of the famous novels provided by the contest. Check the guidelines for how to use the novel lines. This year's competition uses The Thin Man by Dashiell Hammett, Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll, and A Telephone Call by Dorothy Parker. Entrants may enter for all three and win all prizes.

WORKSHOPS AND CONFERENCES 2018 Kauai Writers Conference November 5-11, 2018 Location: Kauai Marriott Resort, Kalapaki Bay, Lihue, Kauai, Hawaii Dates: November 5-11, 2018, Master classes November 5-8, Conference November 9-11 Deadline: Open now Website: kauaiwritersconference.com/registration Cost: Master Classes $695.00 to $1250.00, manuscript critique/consult $95.00, $100.00 per class discount if registering for both Master Classes and conference at the same time, pitch sessions $50.00, conference $695.00, Room rates $179.00, Luau $79.00 per person, travel to/from conference not included. Event Details: Offers intensive master classes, pitch sessions, work critiques/evaluations and an impressive range of bestselling authors, screenwriters, poets, agents, publishers, and presenters for networking. CCW member Roxan McDonald is on the list offaculty, as are poet Ellen Bass, authors Scott Turow, Jane Smiley, Sara Gruen, and Alice Hoffman, plus many more distinguished writers, publishers, and agents. From a PR email: What better place to kick off NaNoWriMo than a tropical paradise? What better place to find inspiration and to recharge before the holiday season? Rooms are still available at the Kauai Marriott Resort at the deeply discounted rate. The volcano you’ve heard so much about is more than 300 miles away, so you may be struck by inspiration, but not by lava. `Olelo No`eau: E mālama i ka `ōlelo, i kuleana e kipa mai ai . Remember the invitation, for it gives you the privilege of coming here.

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If the Shoes Fits… By Jonathan Shoemaker

 

Proofreading    

Okay, let’s get serious.

Really, Jonathan?

Yeah, I know, but I think it might help someone if I share some tricks I learned, and some of my own, that make proofreading easier and more exacting.

Proofreading is so important! But it must be done after enough time has passed. I need to forget how I wrote the piece in order to read it with fresh eyes. Then I can catch long sentences that might confuse the reader; think of a shorter, more direct way to express the idea. A well placed semicolon may resolve an awkward sentence.

Sometimes it’s hard to tell if I unnecessarily repeated myself when I already got the point across. A subject may stir me to the point that I’m not sure I can proofread it objectively shortly after writing it.

Of course, presenting our work to a critique group is quite effective in this regard, but if that’s not available, my policy is: Put it on the back burner. Let it rest for awhile. Then reread, reword, and rewrite!

Rereading the material aloud is important. Better yet, I can read it into a voice recorder. If I wait a while before listening to it, the phrasing is relatively new to me, and I can recognize sentences that are confusing or easily misunderstood. I also notice whole sections that should be reworded for clarity or should be deleted entirely because they don’t relate to the main thrust of the piece. If a phrase sounds overly familiar, I check to make sure I didn’t just use it recently. Some say that adverbs should always be eliminated, but they definitely have their place. I do try to avoid adverbs in dialogue tags; and I don’t even need “s/he said” if I show action to accompany the quote (She rolled her eyes. “I’m not impressed!”), like Hemingway and Follett.

I can always insert a tag if the the speaker isn’t clearly apparent. It irks me to have to search back to see who’s talking.

In general: ● Nouns, adjectives, and verbs that are spelled the same (present, for example) can cause confusion. Be cautious.

They sneak up on you. ● Avoid nominalization! Use the verb: “Tom suggested…” rather than “Tom made the suggestion…” ● Rewrite your sentences to replace passive verbs with stronger ones. It serves to grab the reader’s attention: “He

picked up the gun.” rather than “He was picking up the gun.” ● Cull out clichés and repeated words or phrases. Word search your material for overused words, like “and,”

“that,” or the same word in successive sentences. (Hit “Find” in the Edit menu.) Words like “very” and “really” tend to be superfluous.

● If you have two synonyms in the same paragraph, try switching them to see which way it sounds better—or if the meaning is thus clarified.

“If you are going to achieve excellence in big things, you develop the habit in little matters.” —Colin Powell

Be well, and proofread,  Jonathan 

 

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The Last Word By Lana Bryan

To Dad, on the Occasion of His 88th Birthday 

CCW EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE

President Laurie Sheehan Vice President Sharon Law Tucker Secretary Joyce Krieg Treasurer Clarissa Conn Programs Chair Nancy Middleton CCW Workshops Sharon Law Tucker Membership Maria Skyttä Publicity Jason Warburg Hospitality Sarah Pruitt Newsletter Lana Bryan Webmaster Ken Jones Writing Contests Ned Huston/Dennis Hamilton Assistant Webmaster Kemberlee Shortland Central Board Representative Lana Bryan

Scribbles is the official monthly publication for members of Central Coast Writers, a branch of California Writers Club, a registered non-profit corporation. All material is copyrighted ©2018 by California Writers Club and may not be reproduced without permission. Opinions expressed under individual bylines do not necessarily represent an official position of, or endorsement by, Central Coast Writers or California Writers Club. Scribbles is published by: Central Coast Writers, Post Office Box 997, Pacific Grove, CA 93950 Editorial Staff Lana Bryan Editor Nancy Jacobs Poetry Corner Patricia Watson Contests and Workshops C. Jonathan Shoemaker If the Shoe Fits Michelle Smith Member Profiles Nancy Middleton Monthly Speaker Leslie Patiño Proofreader

CCW Website centralcoastwriters.org

For anything Scribbles related: Contact Scribbles editor Lana Bryan:

lana.bryan@writeteam.com

Not yet a member of CCW? You can join at a monthly meeting or online at:

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Dear Dad, Your 88th birthday. How amazing to live 88 years!

And now you start on your 89th year. You’ve seen so much, so many changes in the world. Some good, some bad. You’ve seen this country make terrible mistakes and then correct itself, then go on and make more mistakes. You’ve seen unbelievable changes in communication and transportation and medicine.

If you could go back to your young self at age 10, say, or at 16, what would you say to that person?

Wouldn’t he be surprised to learn that he would be married to the same lovely and dear woman for nearly 63 years? A marriage of devotion and laughter, and yes, a little conflict, but overall, a happy union.

Wouldn’t he be surprised to learn that he would have four grown, happy and stable children, all with their own children, and some of those children with children of their own, making you a great-grandfather!

Wouldn’t he be surprised to learn that he made enough money to have a comfortable life and that his four children were all in touch with him and loved him, unlike so many estranged parents and children?

Wouldn’t he be amazed to learn that, thinking himself an only child for many years, he would find two half sisters later in life?

Wouldn’t that youngster that was you be thrilled to know that he would see interesting and beautiful places not only in this country, but also in Europe?

I hope you take some time on your 88th birthday to look back at your wonderful life. And then continue to look forward with anticipation to see what the 89th year might bring!

Love, Lana

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California Writers Club Central Coast Writers Branch Post Office Box 997 Pacific Grove, CA 93950  

June 19

John Lescroart Twenty Years To Overnight Success

5:30 p.m. - CHECK-IN and DINNER 6:30 p.m. - MEETING

Point Pinos Grill 79 Asilomar Boulevard

Pacific Grove 

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