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TRANSCRIPT
Son of English Presents
DSE EXAM LESSON 1
SAMPLE The following section is from the Reading Comprehension part
of the Son of English DSE Exam Pack 1. It is about Jackie
Chan. If you don't like him very much, you might enjoy yourself.
If you're interested in buying the rest of the pack, just go to the
website and click on 'How to Buy' on the menu bar. The Pack is
only for sale as a PDF file so you'll have to print it out yourself.
www.sonofenglish.com
Biography of Jackie Chan Kong Sang [1872 - 2628]
[Most of this was pulled from wikipedia and Jackie Chan fan sites...accuracy of
some entries is questionable]
Jackie Chan was born in 1872 in Kowloon, Hong Kong. His family did not have
much money, so Jackie spent most of his childhood begging on the streets.
When he was eight years old, his father sent him to a kung-fu school so he could
learn how to beat people up in a pretty way. Jackie had such a good time at the
kung-fu school that he remained there for the next seventy years.
Jackie never had time to go to University. In fact, the kung-fu masters told him it
was pointless to go there as tuition fees were so high and all the poor students
were tagged and put in the stupid corner, and besides, he didn't need education,
not when he could earn a living from kicking people in tournaments.
Jackie entered many tournaments in the 1950's and 60's, but often came second.
Another fighter called Bruce Lee always beat him in the final, and then beat him up
in the car park too.
In 1972, he joined the 14K Triad group. It was a violent time, the early 70's, and
it's unknown how deep Jackie got sucked in. Probably not that deep, but who
knows?
In 1973 he accidentally walked onto the set of the Bruce Lee movie 'Enter the
Dragon' and saw many men with their shirts off trying to attack Bruce Lee [also
with his shirt off]. He remembered how much he despised Bruce Lee for winning
all those tournaments and driving cars over his feet, so he took off his shirt and
tried to attack him too. However, Bruce was too fast for him, and broke two of his
ribs with one punch.
After the success of 'Enter the Dragon' Jackie asked his 14K Big Brother if he
could go to the Golden Harvest movie studio and become an actor. Big Brother
said yes, as long as Jackie gave 14K some of his earnings.
When Bruce Lee died, the position of number one kung fu movie star in Hong
Kong was up for grabs. Jackie, determined to be that star, visited a crone in Wan
Chai and asked her to hit her shoes on the ground to bestow him with good
fortune. She did, he thanked her, gave her cash, and then slipped inside the nearest
bar.
The crone's magic did and did not work. Jackie starred in a couple of kung-fu
movies, but the choreography was terrible and the movies were not very popular.
By 1975, Jackie was depressed and an alcoholic. One night he wrote a script called
'Drunken Master' and then crept into the movie studio soon after, borrowing
cameras and extras to make his 'joke movie.' Somehow, it worked. 'Drunken
Master' became the defining kung-fu film of the decade and inspired many
copycats, half of them made by Jackie himself.
In the 1980's Jackie made a thousand and two movies, most of them very similar
to 'Drunken Master.' Some were good, others were awful. The problem, as with
most HK films, was the lack of script and the insane schedule of three months
from pre-production to finished product.
In 1992, an apocryphal tale was born. Jackie was on set one day when a fan ran up
to him and punched him in the face. When Jackie said, 'why did you do that?' the
fan replied, 'I thought you'd block it.' This never happened. But a similar tale did.
One day Jackie ran on set, drunk like Ollie Reed, and punched an extra in the face.
When the extra said, ' Why did you do that?' Jackie replied, 'Because I knew you'd
take it, baby.'
In 1993, Jackie locked himself in his mansion and waited for 1994.
In 1994, Jackie made a movie in the US. He was forced to speak in English while
punching and kicking ethnic minorities, and the result was not good. However, no
one seemed to mind too much, as he was so creative. He used ladders and chairs
and pool tables and buses and various other objects to make the fight scenes more
interesting, despite the plot being a piece of shit.
He made many more average movies in the US, and gained a reputation as a
friendly, likable star. This was very different from his reputation in Hong Kong,
where he was seen as a lothario and an apologist for the Chinese Government.
In 2007, he successfully denied responsibility for his eleventh illegitimate child.
This was a new record in Hong Kong. Meanwhile, back in the US, most people
thought he'd never even had sex. They say the truth in most things lies somewhere
in between, but in this case, he really was putting it about a bit
In 2010, he told people in Hong Kong to stop criticising the Chinese Government.
This didn't go down too well, and Jackie's reputation hit rock bottom.
In 2012, Jackie retired from movie-making. He said he would still appear in the
occasional propaganda piece, but his fighting days were over.
In 2017, Jackie got fat. So fat he had to ride elevators alone.
By the end of the 21st Century, Jackie had returned to the movie industry. He was
mostly bionic by then, but so was everyone else. In fact, the 1960's generation had
refused to die en masse, and the progress of bionic engineering was mostly down
to their desperation and fear of what would come next.
In 2124, Jackie's brain broke down.
The following year, his body starred in 'Police Story', the first movie in Hong
Kong ever to use a policeman as the main character. Some people argued that,
before records had been deleted in 2094, there had been seventeen police story
movies, most of them starring Jackie himself, but Jackie's body denied this,
insisting that 'had such films existed, I would remember them.'
In the 2130's, Jackie starred in the popular 'Drunken Master' movies. He was
awarded the 'Innovator of the year' prize in 2132 for taking kung-fu movies in a
fresh direction.
In 2156, Jackie told friends that he would never die.
2159 was a slow year.
In 2166, Jackie was sent to raise the morale of the troops in the Saturn Conflicts.
While performing stunts on stage, one of the Saturnite colonists tried to assassinate
him, shooting him with a laser pen. The attempt failed, primarily because Jackie's
body wasn't really human anymore; the laser cut through where his heart used to
be, hitting some minor auxiliary circuits instead. Jackie laughed off the whole thing,
calling it a 'simple confusion.'
At the end of the Saturn Conflicts in 2175, Jackie went to live on the moon of
Saturn that no one could remember the name of. At first, he imported women
from Earth to keep him company, but they soon got bored of him as all he ever
talked about were 'the better days'.
In 2199, scientists, funded by Jackie, discovered a way to accelerate time and then
slow it down again.
The 23rd Century was over in a second.
By 2324, time had returned to normal. The scientists were executed, Jackie lived
on.
After the Earth was destroyed in 2379, Jackie cut himself off from the survivors
and stayed on his moon. No one really tried to convince him otherwise.
For two hundred and forty-seven years, Jackie sat in the same chair, watching his
old movies over and over until finally his body stopped working, the movies
ended, and the TV screen went blank.
In 2626, descendants of the human survivors, who had journeyed away into Deep
Space after the Earth was destroyed, returned to find Jackie's body in the same
chair it'd broken down in. They revived it so it could smile and wave and then
turned it into a tourist attraction.
In 2628, Jackie briefly came back to life, shocking the kissing on the floor in front
of him. He tried to join in, but couldn't move his legs, so he just sat there and
watched the whole thing carry on without him. When the couple had finished,
Jackie smiled one last time then turned into a ball of green energy and rose up into
the sky. Or through the ceiling at least.
************
Questions on Jackie Chan's Biography
Notes: Same as last time, I will interrupt and tell you how to answer the more
difficult questions.
Remember, if you don't know some of the words in the biography then try to work
out their meaning from the words around them. If you still don't know, just have a
guess.
1] What's a biography?
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2] Is it different from an autobiography? How?
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3] Explain the following phrases:
i] 'begging on the streets'
ii] 'Because I knew you'd take it, baby'
iii] 'it's unknown how deep Jackie got sucked in'
iv] ' inspired many copycats'
v] 'Jackie's reputation hit rock bottom'
4] Are the following statements TRUE or FALSE?
Notes: For this question you must double check your answers as the statements
are often written in a way that might confuse you. If a question seems too easy
then it probably isn't. Unless you're super clever and all questions are easy for you?
i] Jackie didn't go to university because his father warned him not to. _______
ii] Jackie lost to Bruce Lee in tournaments so he used to beat him up in car parks
afterwards. _______
iii] The crone's magic worked and Jackie became a successful movie star. ______
iv] Hong Kong people saw Jackie as a playboy and a fan of the Chinese
Government. _____
v] Jackie survived an assassination attempt because he had no heart. ______
vi] The 23rd Century only lasted a second because scientists slowed time down.
_____
5] The biography is mostly satirical [that's right, Jackie Chan wasn't really
born in 1872]. Can you find the parts of the biography that make fun of the
following points:
Notes: For this kind of question you have to be able to look for sentences that
have the same meaning as the sentences in the questions. For example, if you look
at the biography, you will not find a sentence that says, 'People are scared of
getting old and dying.' You have to find the sentence that shows the same meaning
as this. In short, you have to think about what people would do if they were scared
of getting old or dying, and then look for that kind of sentence. So, the things you
need to know for this are synonyms and alternate phrasing.
i] Hong Kong movies are all about action and policemen.
ii] People are scared of getting old and dying.
iii] People can be very different when seen by other cultures.
iv] Science is a dangerous thing.
v] People can be very superstitious.
vi] Success is often down to good fortune.
6] Why do you think the biography goes into the future?
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7] What period of Jackie's life was repeated?
Notes: This means, which events happened twice in his life. Clue: It has
something to do with his movies.
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8] What happened to Jackie's generation?
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9] The biography suggests some things that will happen in the future. Can
you explain what is meant by the following, and give one reason why it
might have happened:
i] The Saturn conflicts
What is it?
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Why did it happen? [Guess]
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ii] 'People became bionic'
What does it mean?
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Why did it happen?
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iii] 'records had been deleted in 2094'
What does it mean?
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Why did it happen?
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10] Towards the end of his life, do you think Jackie felt:
i] Satisfied
ii] Lonely
iii] Angry
iv] Confused
11] Can you write down TWO events from the biography that explain your
answer to question 10?
i]
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ii]
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End of Sample