spongebob squarepants - the end

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

"The End"

written by

Matt Burns

FIRST DRAFT

05/03/2012

ACT ONE

EXT./ESTAB. SPONGEBOB’S HOUSE - DAY

INT. SPONGEBOB’S BEDROOM - SAME

An alarm clock BLARES and SPONGEBOB launches out of bed, slamming into the ceiling.

As he floats to the ground, he sings:

SPONGEBOB

I’m ready! I’m ready!

He glides onto the floor next to GARY, who is chewing on a turkey leg.

SPONGEBOB (CONT’D)

I’m re-- Gary! How rude! Eating a big

turkey leg on the morning of the

Krabby Patty Eating Challenge? You

know I’ve been fasting all week and

I’m starving!

GARY

Meow.

Gary continues chewing and Spongebob lays on the ground next to him, ferociously licking his lips.

SPONGEBOB

So... hungry... So... empty of food...

So... light...

A golden wave of delicious scent crawls in through the open window, slides beneath Spongebob, and lifts him into the air.

Spongebob sniffs in a lung-full of the smell, sucking the wave into his nose with all his power. As he sucks the wave inside, it disappears and he crashes onto the floor.


What in Bikini Bottom is this heavenly

smell?

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS "The End" 1.

Another wave creeps in the window. Spongebob sniffs it and his eyes bulge out of their sockets.


So... tempting...

Spongebob hops onto it, hugging it, and shimmies on it out his window, sucking in deep sniffs and licking it wildly.

EXT. SPONGEBOB’S HOUSE - DAY

Spongebob licks his way across the wave into Squidward’s window.

INT. SQUIDWARD’S KITCHEN - DAY

SQUIDWARD sings to himself as he cooks french toast and crepes.

SQUIDWARD

One final meal/One last perfect

meal/All alone/No Spongebob in

sight...

Spongebob crawls into the frame and sucks the last of the wave into his nose. He crashes into Squidward’s french toast pan. Spongebob screams as his backside sizzles and clutches Squidward’s face, revealing his singed behind.

Squidward screams and throws his spatula against the wall as he shakes wildly to throw Spongebob onto the ground.

SQUIDWARD (CONT’D)

Spongebob! What are you doing up this

early? Souldn’t you be dreaming about

spatulas?

SPONGEBOB

No, silly! Today’s the Krabby Patty

Eating Challenge and I’ve been

training my stomach all week. Won’t

you be there to cook up the patties?


SQUIDWARD

What a tempting offer. Sure, I’d love

to spend my final day grilling up

hundreds of Krabby Patties for you and

your pink friend.

Spongebob dances on his tip-toes and his eyes light up.

SPONGEBOB

Perfect! (Whispering) Can I have one

with... extra toe-may-toes?

SQUIDWARD

No! I’m not going in today. And I

still don’t know why you’re in my

house.

SPONGEBOB

I’m so hungry that I had to follow the

smell of your scrumptious baking.

INSERT: Inside Spongebob’s torso we see his stomach is deflated like a balloon.

SQUIDWARD

Oh. Well, I guess you can stay if

you’re here to appreciate my culinary

abilities.

Spongebob bats his lashes at Squidward and slides next to the french toast.

SPONGEBOB

What are you making? Special occasion?

SQUIDWARD

You wouldn’t understand. It’s just

some breakfast. Regular breakfast.


SPONGEBOB

But it smells so special. Come on,

Squidward. Let me in on the secret.

Please? A little gift for Mrs.

Squidward?

SQUIDWARD

No.

SPONGEBOB(motioning to the cover girl on Squidward’s magazine)

Something special for Lady Clarinet?

SQUIDWARD

No.

SPONGEBOB

A treat for me, your bestest friend?

SQUIDWARD

No! Fine, if it will shut you up.

Squidward opens a newspaper and begins reading.


Spongebob Squarepants, Nickelodeon’s

smash-hit show that ran for over a

decade has been put out to dry.

SPONGEBOB

So... We get to be raisins?

SQUIDWARD

No! We’re cancelled!

SPONGEBOB

Cancelled?


SQUIDWARD

Don’t you get it? We’re through! The

network is ending us, pronto! We’re

over, okay? Done-zo, kaput, out to

pasture. We’re has-been drawings in a

computer-generated world.

Spongebob hesitates, then bursts into laughter.

SPONGEBOB

Don’t be silly, Squidward! We can’t

just end!

SQUIDWARD

Fine, fine! You’re so right. We’ll

just go on forever. Delude yourself

all you want. But know that all things

must end, Spongebob, so please let me

just enjoy this final meal.

SPONGEBOB

There’s still more jellyfish to catch!

Krabby Patties to flip! I still need

my boating license!

Squidward sits and leans over his french toast.

SQUIDWARD

It’s over. The merchandise sales have

nose-dived and we’ve shot ourselves in

the foot with online streaming.

Remember Tommy? Arnold? Their horrible

stories of the White Light sometimes

keep me awake all night.


Squidward notices Spongebob is missing.


Spongebob? Spongebob? Oh no! Did it

happen all ready? Is this it? Is this

the final resting place--

Spongebob pops out of Squidward’s toaster.

SPONGEBOB

I’m so hungry I’m about to eat my own

toast! Just two hours until the

contest!

SQUIDWARD(shaking Spongebob)

You don’t get it, do you? This is it!

Today’s our last day!

Spongebob chews on his side and moans with pleasure.

Squidward throws down his fork and knife.


Follow me.

EXT. SPONGEBOB’S STREET - DAY

Squidward and Spongebob get into Squidward’s car. Squidward drives very quickly.

SPONGEBOB

Don’t take me toward any food! I can’t

take it!

Spongebob offers Squidward a handful of yellow crumbs.


Toasted Spongebob?

As Squidward and Spongebob approach distant houses, the houses become larger and reveal a poorly-drawn, sketchy quality. The background becomes pixelated.


SQUIDWARD

See?! The artists aren’t putting in

the work anymore! They don’t care!

It’s so rough out here! We’re done!

Spongebob gets out of the car and runs his hand along the roughly-drawn house. He pulls it back like he got stung.

SPONGEBOB

Ouch. That is rough.

Squidward nods.

SQUIDWARD

They’ve moved on, Spongebob.

Spongebob nods and gets in the car.

They drive back silently.

INT. SQUIDWARD’S KITCHEN - DAY

Spongebob and Squidward enter, their heads hung low.

SQUIDWARD

I just want a calm, quiet day. We can

relax and I can finally eat my french--

PATRICK kicks down Squidward’s front door, which smashes his kitchen table and ruins his french toast. Patrick is munching on an ear of corn.

PATRICK

Spongebob! Time to chow down!

SQUIDWARD

My breakfast! And why are you looking

for Spongebob in my house?

Patrick looks around, spots Spongebob, and chuckles.


PATRICK

Oh, uh... Well, I found him! Come on,

buddy, let’s eat!

SPONGEBOB

Patrick, there’s something I have to

tell you. It’s pretty serious.

PATRICK

Tell me after the contest! I listen

better when I’ve got about a hundred

Krabby Patties in me.

SPONGEBOB

No, listen, we don’t have much time

left--

PATRICK

Until the contest!

Patrick snaps and a motorcycle cruises up next to him.

He tucks Spongebob under his arm and zooms away.

PATRICK (CONT’D)

To the Krusty Krab!

As Spongebob glides away, he stares back at Squidward. They lock eyes and share a melancholy gaze.

INT. KRUSTY KRAB - DAY

It’s packed to the brim with spectators - Sandy, Mrs. Puff, Pearl, the Flying Dutchman, Mermaid Man, Barnacle Boy, Plankton - everyone from Bikini Bottom is there.

At the front of the restaurant is a stage covered in a large banner - FIRST ANNUAL KRABBY PATTY EATING CHALLENGE - where LARRY THE LOBSTER sits behind a table wearing a bib and doing sit-ups.

MR. KRABS hawks merchandise from a booth to anxious fans.


MR. KRABS

Get yer t-shirts yere! Get yer t-

shirts, mugs, koozies, and night-

lights! Get yer official Krusty Krab

envelopes for sending money directly

to the Krusty Krab!

The crowd becomes unruly, pushing and shoving. SANDY stands on top of the crowd.

SANDY

When’s this rodeo fixin’ to start?

I’ve got another rodeo to be at!

Patrick’s motorcycle crashes through the ceiling. He and Spongebob land in their seats on the stage.

LARRY

Good afternoon, losers.

Patrick salivates wildly. Spongebob sits motionless, in a serious daze.

MR. KRABS

The competition begins now!

Mr. Krabs pulls a rope and piles of Krabby Patties fall from the ceiling onto the table. The crowd goes wild.

Larry and Patrick attack the burgers, funneling them into their mouths by the dozen. Larry bounces some off his biceps and kicks some into his mouth with his toned legs. Patrick uses a shovel to scoop them in. Larry flips some into his mouth with his pecs. Patrick operates himself like a vacuum cleaner, guiding his body with his arm to suck up the Patties.

Spongebob holds a Patty to his lips, but he can’t bring himself to bite it.

The crowd cheers.


SANDY

Come on, Spongebob! Attack them

patties!

PEARL

Ooh! They’re getting so full! I’m

nervous! I’m jealous!

MR. KRABS

Yes, yes, yes! I can’t wait to write

them their bills for this meal!

INSERT: Mr. Krabs envisions each Patty as a dollar sign going into each contestant’s mouth.

MR. KRABS (CONT’D)

Hey, Spongebob, eat more dollars! I

mean, Patties!

Squidward enters and calmly walks to the side of the crowd. He looks to Spongebob.

SQUIDWARD

Have fun, buddy. Just have fun today.

Spongebob sets his Patty down as Patrick and Larry turn green. They hover with nausea.

PATRICK

Just... two... hundred... more...

Patrick takes one more bite and collapses, face-down, onto the table.

The crowd explodes into chaos.

FISH 1

Larry wins!

FLYING DUTCHMAN

No, Patrick ate more Patties!


FISH 1

But he’s knocked out!

The crowd erupts into a brawl, with two sides forming. Some people hoist up banners proclaiming their side pro-Patrick or Pro-Larry.

Mr. Krabs takes the stage.

MR. KRABS

Hold yer horses, hold yer horses.

There’s a simple solution here and

that’s to have a second Eating

Challenge next week, sudden death,

where tickets will be double the

price. Sound good? Great to me!

MERMAID MAIN

What a rip!

BARNACLE BOY

You’re the worst villain of all,

Krabs!

FISH 1

But Larry won!

FISH 2

Patrick won!

The crowd again breaks out into a dust-filled brawl.

Spongebob stands and shakes Patrick’s still body.

SPONGEBOB

Patrick?

Patrick moans and lies face-down.

Spongebob takes the microphone from Mr. Krabs.



Excuse me? Can I have your attention?

FISH 1

What do you want, light-weight?

FISH 2

You didn’t even have one crumb!

SPONGEBOB

Listen, everyone, please calm down.

Please stop fighting. Sir, put down

your antique rocking chair.

A man bashfully lowers his chair, on which his grandmother sits, swatting her cane.

GRANDMOTHER

Why’s it so loud in here?

SPONGEBOB

This eating contest was fun, but it’s

not all that matters in life.

FISH 3

Hey, we didn’t pay for a speech!

SPONGEBOB

There’s a reason I couldn’t eat

anything during the challenge, and

it’s why there’s no time for a re-

match. My neighbor-- No, my friend

Squidward told me this morning that

we, all of us, are being cancelled.

The crowd gasps.


SANDY

Don’t worry! Things like this blow

over all the time in Texas! Like a

mean prairie wind!

SPONGEBOB

No. It’s true. The houses in the

distance and our backgrounds are

rougher than ever. Have you noticed

yourself just going through the

motions? You haven’t done anything new

in years? Food just doesn’t taste as

good as it used to?

LARRY

The Patties were somewhat bland...

INSERT: Inside Larry’s stomach, mountains of Krabby Patties fester. Their color is washed out and pale. Stinky fumes hover around them.

LARRY (CONT’D)

Perhaps I didn’t need to eat nine

hundred of them.

SANDY

My pecan pies have been kinda bland...

Some days I don’t even know why I make

them.

SPONGEBOB

Friends, we have to savor these final

moments. Do not fight each other. Do

not argue. Have fun and share your

love.


(MORE)

From now until tonight, when the White

Light will take us, at least we have

each other.

Spongebob puts the microphone down and shakes Patrick, but he still won’t wake up.

Mr. Krabs takes the microphone. The crowd whispers concerned murmurs.

MR. KRABS

Thank you all for coming today. Thank

you all for coming to the Krusty Krab

so many times over the years. And as

always, end-of-series souvenirs and

White Light protective helmets are on

sale at the merchandise booth.

Squidward walks onto the stage and helps Spongebob shake Patrick, but they can’t get him to wake up.

The crowd exits the Krusty Krab, some crying, others dazed.

FISH 1

I’ve never been to the surface.

FISH 2

I’ve never even been to Jellyfish

Fields.

INT. TREEDOME - DAY

Sandy enters, alone, and walks into her closet.

SANDY

I’ve spent so much time in this space

suit, I’ve hardly gotten to wear my

cute outfits.

MONTAGE:


SPONGEBOB (CONT'D)

Sandy tries on dresses, skirts, and fancy blouses. She smiles at herself in the mirror and a tear comes out of her eye.

SANDY (CONT’D)

Mama always said I’d look prettier in

a gown.

END MONTAGE.

EXT. GOO LAGOON - DAY

Larry runs through an empty beach with his surfboard.

A lone lifeguard shouts at him.

LIFEGUARD

No one’s here, Larry! You can’t show

off!

Larry dives in and paddles out. He rides a big wave.

LARRY

For once, pal, this one’s for me.


MONTAGE:

Spongebob, in a karate outfit, karate-chops Patrick.

He jumps up and down on him, springing like Patrick is a trampoline.

He is dressed as a hair-metal rock star and plays a hot guitar solo and screams at Patrick.

He blows a leaf-blower in Patrick’s face. Patrick does not move.

END MONTAGE.

SPONGEBOB

Bring in the big guns.

Squidward opens his clarinet case and plays a noisy solo, but Patrick won’t wake up.

MRS. PUFF approaches the stage, crying. She holds out a boating license.


MRS. PUFF

Spongebob, I want you to have this. I

kept it from you for too long.

Spongebob smiles and reaches for it, but then he pushes her hand away.

SPONGEBOB

I don’t deserve this, Mrs. Puff. Maybe

we’ll come back for a new series and

I’ll earn it.

Mrs. Puff smiles, choking back tears.

MRS. PUFF

Yes, I will go ahead and enroll you.

Mrs. Puff walks off, crying.

Spongebob looks to Squidward.

SPONGEBOB

Could we, Squidward? Come back for a

new series?

Squidward shakes his head.

SQUIDWARD

It wouldn’t be the same. It wouldn’t

be us.

INT. SHADY SHOALS REST HOME - DAY

MERMAID MAN and BARNACLE BOY stretch and pull on their gloves.

MERMAID MAN

We’ll defeat the White Light! It’s no

match for us!


BARNACLE BOY

And we’re finally going to get that

sinister--

Barnacle Boy swings open the door, revealing MAN-RAY standing there, holding a bowl of popcorn.

BARNACLE BOY (CONT’D)

Man-Ray?

MAN-RAY

The Sinister Slug episode is on TV. Do

you guy want to just, you know, watch

it?

Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy look to each other and shrug.

MERMAID MAIN

Pass the popcorn, pal.

INT. KRUSTY KRAB KITCHEN - DAY

PLANKTON pokes out from beneath a bucket and sees Mr. Krabs standing by the stove, flipping patties.

MR. KRABS

It’s been so long since I’ve cooked

these. I can barely remember the

recipe.

PLANKTON

But you... do remember it?

MR. KRABS

Of course. You know what? Oh, come

here. It’s a blend of chili powder--

PLANKTON

Stop! No! I can’t.

Karen’s voice blares over Plankton’s walkie-talkie.


KAREN (V.O.)

What is it, dear? What happened?

You’re so close!

PLANKTON

Forget the recipe, sweetheart. I’m

coming home. I just want to eat your

cooking tonight.

INT. HALLOWEEN COSTUME STORE - DAY

Two YOUNG FISH model Flying Dutchman costumes.

The FLYING DUTCHMAN appears from beneath a dressing room stall.

YOUNG FISH 1

Aahhh!

YOUNG FISH 2

Don’t hurt us! We’re sorry! We know

you hate it when kids dress up as you.

The Flying Dutchman chuckles to himself.

FLYING DUTCHMAN

It’s okay today, kids.

He puts his hat on Young Fish 1’s head.

FLYING DUTCHMAN (CONT’D)

Now that’ll scare ‘em. Just promise me

you’ll have fun today.

He floats away as the kids shriek with excitement.

INT. PATCHY THE PIRATE’S HOUSE - DAY

PATCHY THE PIRATE sits on his couch, alone, curled into a ball, rocking back and forth.



Spongebob drills a jackhammer into Patrick’s back, but he still sleeps. Spongebob tosses the jackhammer into a pile of items: alarm clocks, drills, bombs, firecrackers, jet engines, guitar amplifiers, etc.

SQUIDWARD

We don’t have much time.

SPONGEBOB

I just want him to be there.

Squidward slides his shoulders under Patrick’s arms. Spongebob picks up his legs and they walk outside.

EXT. JELLYFISH FIELDS - DAY

Spongebob and Squidward enter the fields, carrying Patrick.

Everyone else is already here - camped out on blankets overlooking the pristine fields for a perfect view of the impending White Light.

The crowd notices Spongebob and begins to chant.

CROWD

Speech! Speech! Speech!

Larry hoists Spongebob onto his shoulders.

SPONGEBOB

Oh, um... I wasn’t really planning on

giving so many speeches today. But the

time has come for us, gang. I hope you

all have spent today with your loved

ones. I want to thank you all for

being my best friends in the whole

world - Sandy, I wouldn’t know a

karate chop from a cow pie without

you. Mr. Krabs, you’re the best boss a

sponge could have.


(MORE)

And Squidward, even when your clarinet

was shattering my windows, I was

always happy to know you were right

there, next door. I only have one last

wish. Will you all gather in a circle

to give my friend Patrick a hug? He’s

knocked out from all those Patties,

but I know if we join together he’ll

be able to feel the love.

Everyone huddles around Patrick’s snoring body and wraps in a giant group-hug.

Patrick’s eyes start to wobble, then they open.

PATRICK

Huh? Is this burger heaven?

Spongebob hops off Larry’s shoulders and runs to Patrick.

SPONGEBOB

Buddy! You’re back!

PATRICK

Uh... duh! What’s going on here?

Squidward motions for the crowd to give them some space.

SPONGEBOB

Basically we’re all gathered here

because we’re about to enter... Burger

Heaven, all together.

PATRICK

Burger Heaven? I can chow down like

this every day?


SPONGEBOB (CONT'D)

SPONGEBOB

Absolutely. It’s like... This white

light will come... And... I... I

actually don’t know what it will be

like.

PATRICK

We got cancelled.

SPONGEBOB

What?

PATRICK

I know, Spongebob. I’ve known for

weeks. The White Light comes tonight.

SPONGEBOB

But you acted so...

PATRICK

Dumb? I didn’t want to worry you, pal.

Everything’s so much more fun when

we’re just acting stupid. Where’s the

fun in being so serious?

Spongebob wipes a tear from his eye.

SPONGEBOB

You always had my back.

PATRICK(loudly)

Had your back? What would I do with

your back, Spongebob? Clean a dish?

The crowd laughs.


FISH 1

Patrick’s back!

Patrick winks to Spongebob.

They both stand, next to Squidward, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, Plankton, Karen, Pearl, Spongebob’s parents, Squidward and Patrick’s families, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. Gary crawls into Spongebob’s hand.

SPONGEBOB

What do you think about one last song?

The crowd mumbles agreement.


I said, are you ready, friends?

CROWD

Aye aye, Spongebob.

Spongebob climbs to the top of a tree.

SPONGEBOB

I can’t hear you!

CROWD

Aye aye, Spongebob!

Spongebob dives onto the crowd’s shoulders and they parade him around as he leads them in song. Spongebob dances like a maniac on the shoulders of everyone he knows and loves.

SPONGEBOB

Oh, what’s the best town in the entire

sea?

CROWD

Bikini Bottom!

SPONGEBOB

Where the Krusty Krab serves you and

me?


CROWD

Bikini Bottom!

SPONGEBOB

Is full of goobers and fun songs to

sing?

CROWD

Bikini Bottom!

SPONGEBOB

Where everyone’s friends except for

jellyfish who sting!

CROWD

Bikini Bottom!

A jellyfish floats to Spongebob and gives him an apprehensive look.

SPONGEBOB

Oh, you’re okay.

The jellyfish hugs Spongebob.


Come on, friends! Bikini Bottom!

CROWD

Bikini Bottom!

SPONGEBOB

Bikini Bottom!

CROWD

Bikini Bottom!

SPONGEBOB

It’s the only home for you and me.

As the song ends, the crowd cheers and lowers Spongebob back to his starting place. He wipes a tear from his eye.



I’m going to miss this place.

MR. KRABS

Thank you, Spongebob, for being so

darn joyful. Even when you were

wreakin’ havoc, you always brought fun

into our lives.

They stare out into the fields as a gentle white haze begins to creep over the horizon.

SANDY

It’s gettin’ cold. Real cold.

Mr. Krabs slides a metal trash can in front of the group and empties his wallet into it. Mounds of cash spill out. He lights a match and drops it in. Everyone huddles around the warmth.

The white light crawls over the sky, covering the buildings and washing out the background colors. Everyone holds hands.

Squidward takes a breath, pulls out his clarinet, and begins playing a slow, melancholy take on the “Spongebob Theme.”

Patrick puts his arm around Spongebob’s shoulder.

PATRICK

We had a good run, buddy.

Spongebob takes a deep breath as the white light engulfs Bikini Bottom.

SPONGEBOB

I’m ready. I’m ready.

FADE OUT.


spongebob squarepants - the end

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