21st

Century Youth/Students

What stuff are they made of?

Daniel M. Sta.Maria

How YOU can help…

How to SAVE a life….

Key Risk Management Concepts:

It’s everyone’s job, responsibility

Collaborative team approach (it’s a

multi-disciplinary approach where

everyone’s contribution is important)

Freedom to identify risks and solutions

Appropriately resourced

Training

Timely communication and action

Orientation:

Empowering one self

Self smart

Three Minds toward Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the miracle by

which we master and restore

ourselves.

~ Thich Nhat Hanh

MIND SET: Responding to

Youth/Students at Risk

Work on prevention, post vention

and intervention

Empathic Listening could be a

start of preventing further risks

among students.

What is Risk Management?

Process of analyzing potential

and perceived risks and taking

steps to avoid or minimize those

risks.

Empathic Listening

and

Making Referrals

Listen…………..

Empathic Listening

summary of what you sense the speaker thinks,

feels, and needs at the moment, without

judgmentwww.sfhelp.org

Empathic Listening

Focus

Feelings

Content

Steps for Empathic Listening

1. Listen carefully to the speaker’s messages,

both verbal and nonverbal

2. Display an open, caring posture

3. Consider the speaker’s emotional state

4. Calmly reflect back what you perceive the

speaker’s feelings and meaning to be with

confidence

American Society for Training and Development

Levels of Listening

Ignoring (doing something)

e.g. texting, talking on the phone, writing,

or using a computer or tablet

Pretended listening (looking yet not listening)

e.g. sometimes gazing at the window or people watching

Levels of Listening

Denying what was heard (rejecting feelings)

e.g. “you are just stressed…”

“don’t worry….tomorrow you’ll feel better”

“it’s just a phase...”

Selective listening (filtering)

i.e. responding only to the parts of a conversation...

Levels of Listening

Attentive listening (using attending behaviors)

e.g. make eye contact, smile or nod

Empathic listening (reflecting feelings and content)• “So you think that...“ “It seems like…”

• "What you need now is...“ “You feel…”

• "You're anxious about..."

• “You’re really feeling...”www.sfhelp.org

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Empathic Listening Example 1

Speaker: “My dad lost his job in Dubai. My mom is not working.

I am not sure if I can enroll next year. Also my

siblings. I don’t know what to do. I feel so hopeless

that I want to die.”

Listener: “If I hear you corrrectly, you are worried about the

financial situation of your family since this might

affect your studies.”

Speaker: “Yes. You don’t know how worried I am. While going

home last night, I thought of throwing myself at a

speeding jeep in front of the school.”

Cont…

Speaker: “It seems you were really affected

when your father lost his job.”

Empathic Listening Example 2

Speaker: “I didn’t attend my classes for 2 weeks now. I just

stayed at home and slept most of the time. If I’m

in the mood, I just eat once a day. I feel so

hopeless that I want to die.”

Listener: “Do you think you are depressed?

Speaker : “I think so. Everything I do is a failure. Nothing is

going right. I’m angry and frustrated. Right now I

don’t see any reason to live anymore.”

Listener: “It seems you are dissatisfied with what is happening

in your life right now.”

Cont…

Speaker: “Yes, very much. Last Monday night, I took sleeping

pills. I woke up the next day feeling dizzy and

nauseated.”

Listener: “You must have felt really bad when you woke up.”

Speaker: “Yes. I also tried hanging myself in the bathroom in

November”.

Listener: “Are you contemplating another suicide attempt

again?

Empathic Listening Example 3

Speaker: “I’m 3 months pregnant. My boyfriend don’t want to talk to me. I

have not told my parents yet. For sure, I know they will get angry

with me. I thought of just killing myself to end all this”.

Listener: “Pretty tough for you, right now, huh? It seems, you are anxious

about what your parents’ reaction will be.

Speaker: “Yes, I am. I will be a disappointment for them. My life is a waste.

I can’t concentrate with school work ever since. I feel I’m at the

end of my rope. It will be better if I just die.”

Listener: “You must be really stressed with your current situation that you

are considering you are ending your life.”

Cont….

Speaker: “Yes. Yesterday, I went to a mall and thought of

jumping off from the building. I don’t see any

reason to live.”

Listener: “This must be really a difficult time for you. Have you

tried to commit suicide before?”

Speaker: “Yes, twice. I feel there is no hope left.”

Listener: “Is the urge to commit suicide very strong lately? If

so, how do you plan to end your life? Do you have

the means for it? Or the means within your reach?

Behaviors to Avoid

• Questioning or Probing

• Judging

• Criticizing

• Lecturing

• Advising

• Interrupting (sssshhh…don’t talk about suicide!)

• Sermonizing (you know you’re committing a sin!)

• Giving autobiographical responses (e.g. “when I was your age…during my time…”)

American Society for Training and Development

How should I TALK with someone who

is suicidal?

• Express empathy for the person and tell them that you care and want to help

• Encourage the person to do most of the talking and listen to them without expressing judgment

• Allow the person to tell about his/her feelings and their reasons for wanting to die

Suicide First Aid Guidelines for the Philippines

How should I TALK with someone who is

suicidal?

• Avoid asking if the person have a ‘mental illness’

• Find out if there is a support system

• Consider and use the person’s belief systems and values, including spiritual and religious beliefs, to encourage them to change their mind about suicide

• Encourage the person to think about their personal strengths

Suicide First Aid Guidelines for the Philippines

Everything has its Limitations

• so with empathic listening, and

counseling. . .

Making a Referral

When to refer….

• When a person presents a problem or a request for information which is beyond your level of competency

• When you feel that personality differences (which cannot be resolved) between you and the person will interfere with his or her effective progress

Making Referral

How to refer…..

• Suggest that he or she may consider availing of the counseling services provided by the OCCS for FREE

• Respect the person being referred

Inform OCCS about your Referral

If the person agrees to the referral, you may:

a. Download the counseling referral form from this website

www.dlsu.edu.ph/offices/sps/default.asp

b. Ask the person to schedule an appointment with a

counselor. In case of emergency, you may

immediately accompany the person to the OCCS

OCCS Address and Contact

Numbers

Room 304, Bro. Connon Bldg.

Local Numbers:

419, Bro. Connon

389, Andrew

Direct Line:

536 02 26

Some Reminders…..

• A person has the freedom to refuse a referral

• Any information provided by the person are strictly confidential. However, if his or her behavior endangers one’s well-being and those of others, it is our utmost responsibility to provide such help to the person without necessarily getting his or her consent

In case of emergency…..

• Take the suicidal person to the nearest safe place (e.g. church, hospital/clinic or police station)

THANK YOU VERY MUCH!