survival of the kindest: towards a compassionate society...george orwell • miklos nyiszli ......
TRANSCRIPT
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Survival of the Kindest: Towards a Compassionate Society
Dacher Keltner
University of California, Berkeley
http://greatergood.berkeley.edu
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SYMPATHY BREAKTHROUGHS (JONATHAN GLOVER, HUMANITY) • George Orwell
• Miklos Nyiszli
• 75% of soldiers refuse to shoot at enemy
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AN EVOLUTIONARY CONUNDRUM & PARTING OF WAYS
• Russel-Wallace: Sympathy created by God
• Thomas Huxley: Sympathy is a cultural construction
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DARWIN: SURVIVAL OF THE KINDEST Darwin argued that sympathy “will have been increased through natural selection; for those communities, which included the greatest number of the most sympathetic members, would flourish best, and rear the greatest number of offspring”
(Darwin, 1871/2004, p.130).
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TAKE CARE OR DIE
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A RELIABLE SIGNAL OF COMPASSION: IT’S NOT IN THE FACE
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THE VOCAL REGISTER OF COMPASSION
Diagram of oral cavity, nasal cavity, and larynx
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VOCAL BURSTS OF POSITIVE EMOTION (Simon-Thomas et al., 2009)
0102030405060708090
100
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VIRAL GOODNESS: THE SPREAD OF COMPASSION • Neonate distress cries • Emotional, Physiological Convergence in Friends • Compassion inspires elevation • Generosity spreads through networks (Fowler &
Cristakis) • Altruism increased in altruistic clusters • Collective Joys
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TACTILE CONTACT: THE 1ST LANGUAGE OF COMPASSION
Diagram of the skin Diagram of the hand and wrist
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TOUCH • Rewards
• Builds Trust
• Signals Safety
• Soothes
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TOUCH AND THE SPREAD OF GOODNESS
Emotion and Touch
010203040506070
Compassion
Gratitude
LoveAnger
Fear
DisgustFreq
uenc
y Cho
osin
g Co
rrect
Emot
ion
Correct LabelNext choice
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THE PROSOCIAL NERVOUS SYSTEM
Oxytocin and Trust
0
10
20
30
40
50
60
Oxytocin Control
% Wh
o Give
Away
Maxim
um
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ARC OF HISTORY: JUSTICE AND COMPASSION • Continuing the trend towards less harm
• Reductions in bullying, torture, rape, death in war, murder, assault (Steve Pinker, 2012)
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TAKE A BREATH
• Nirvana = breathe out
• Yogic practices, meditation: start with breath
• Breathe in, out counting to six, 21 times
• Changes in vagal tone, reductions in anxiety
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BUDDHISM
“ If you want others to be
happy, practice compassion;
if you want to be happy
practice compassion”
- His Holiness, the Dalai Lama
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KINDNESS IN THE WISEDOM OF THE AGES A person of jen, Confucius observes,
• “wishing to establish his own character, also establishes the character of others.”
• “brings the good things of others to completion and does not bring the bad things of others to completion.”
“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion” - His Holiness, the Dalai Lama
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PRACTICE KINDNESS TOWARDS SELF AND OTHERS • Loving Kindness:
• Wish for happiness of two people every day (for one minute)
• We all suffer, experience pain, extend kindness to others • Self-Compassion (Kristin Neff) • Loving Kindness improves:
• Brain function (left hemispheric activity) • Immune system function • Vagal tone
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GRATITUDE • Reverence for what has been given to you
• Gratitude diaries, reflections, letters, kind speech
• McCullough: Written accounting of gratitude, better health three weeks later
• Lyubomirsky: Once a week write down what you’re grateful for, it boosts happiness
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EMERSON: AWE AND COMPASSION In the woods, we return to reason and faith. There I feel that nothing can befall me in life-- no disgrace, no calamity (leaving me my eyes), which nature cannot repair. Standing on the bare ground, — my head bathed by the blithe air and uplifted into infinite space, — all mean egotism vanishes. I become a transparent eyeball; I am nothing; I see all; the currents of the Universal Being circulate through me; I am part or parcel of God. The name of the nearest friend sounds then foreign and accidental; to be brothers, to be acquaintances, master or servant, is then a trifle and a disturbance. I am the lover of uncontained and immortal beauty. “Nature”(1836/1982), p.39
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d = .52
Pens Self-importance Entitlement Taking money
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d = .58 d = .88
d = .86 d = .45
Awe, vastness virtuous behavior
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Coding Touch
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PRACTICE KINDNESS
“If any civilization is to survive, it is the morality of altruism that men have to reject.” - Ayn Rand
“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” - The Dalai Lama
-0.2
-0.15
-0.1
-0.05
0
0.05
0.1
0.15
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0.25
Give to others Spend on self
Chan
ge in
happ
iness
from
morni
ng
Giving away $20 if more rewarding than spending $20 on oneself