survival pod, inspired by dmitry orlov

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So you think being a liveaboard on yachts or a boat slowly cruising around the world is a dream. Do you imagine sailing from one exotic location to another with the sun shimmering on the horizon? Do you want glamorous naked models draping themselves seductively everywhere and cheap wine that flows like a firefighter’s hose? To become a liveaboard you need to practice at home first and these simple tests will prepare you for life afloat with “real liveaboard knowledge” Practical liveaboard boat testsAccommodationMove everything out of your living room. I know it is bigger than a boat but we have to break you in slowly. You can bring the fridge back provided you lay it down face up and put everything you will need first right at the bottom under everything else.SleepingYou are allowed a small mattress provided it is no thicker or comfortable than a slice of burnt toast. Spray it liberally with water to simulate condensation. Fire elastic bands repeatedly at any exposed skin to simulate a mosquito attack. Do not go back to sleep until you find the offending elastic band. Men should put their prized golf clubs on view in the front garden. This will simulate your anchor. It will guarantee that you are awake all night keeping watch. Set the alarm for 3am to simulate another boat coming in and anchoring on top of you. To make it more realistic go outside into the street wearing only a head torch, wave your arms around and point. It won’t make any difference but it looks good. This can also be done naked to prevent too much conversation.WaterWater is your most precious commodity on a boat. If it comes to a choice between the wife or water I am afraid she will have to go, especially if like most women she likes to wash. If she is prepared to clean herself in seawater or the condensation from the windows this may be acceptable. If for some strange reason she needs to wash her underwear rather than wear them for a month then wait for rain.CookingAll meals are to be cooked on a camping gas stove but turn it off half way through the meal to simulate running out of gas. Break out a tin of cold baked beans. You may eat the neighbours prized “Coy Carp” provided you can catch it.CommunicationsYou are allowed a computer provided you use it on battery only and can pick up a dodgy internet connection from the pub a mile down road. Curse anyone who sends you a link to a “Youtube video” or an image that is bigger than a postage stamp. If you have mobile phones turn them off. If for some reason you do forget it will be the bank trying to give you a loan you cannot have. It will also cost you the equivalent of four beers in costs. Expect them to ring tomorrowProvisionsProvisions are limited to what you can carry or drag back from a petrol station 2 miles away. This includes a cylinder of gas. All purchases have to be made by sign language to simulate your total inability to speak the local language. Let 20 people go in front of you to mimic those locals who will push in front of you or have just popped in for a chat. Check all produce for anything that can crawl, jump or eat you such as cockroaches and rats.ToiletsEvery time you use the toilet throw at least two toilet rolls down afterwards and push them in with a plunger. You might as well get used to dismantling a toilet now as you will be doing it in the future… a lot.MaintenanceTake the car engine out and put it in the smallest cupboard it the house. It has to only just fit and the oil filter and water pump has to be impossible to get at. Change both at regular intervals and learn to curse loudly. Have a first aid kit handy.NudityForget the big breasted supermodel. Get three old German men to spend all day naked outside your front window. They have to be able to touch their toes at random intervals for no apparent reason. Occasionally get a well-worn naked woman that needs a good iron and has boobs that she can throw over each shoulder to walk pa

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JEHUSLARGE AND SMALL

A Great JehuA Great Jehu held six pioneersBack then, automobiles were very expensive and the roads were bad. So Kazumi Minoura and other young colporteurs used house cars without engines. They nicknamed these Jehus after the hard-driving charioteer who became one of Israels kings. (2 Ki. 10:15, 16) Three Great Jehus each measured 7.2 feet (2.2 m) long, 6.2 feet (1.9 m) wide, and 6.2 feet (1.9 m) high and each could accommodate up to six pioneers. In addition, 11 bicycle-driven two-man Baby Jehus were built at the Japan branch. Kiichi Iwasaki, who helped to make the Jehus, recalled, Each Jehu had a tent as well as a car battery to supply electricity for lights. Colporteurs were shining the light of truth throughout Japan, pushing and pulling Jehus up and down mountains and across valleys from northerly Hokkaido to Kyushu in the south.

A Baby JehuA Baby Jehu accommodated twoColporteur Ikumatsu Ota stated: When we arrived in a town, we set up our Jehu on a riverbank or in an open field. We first visited prominent men of the town, such as the mayor, and after that we visited homes to introduce our literature. After covering the territory, we moved on to the next town.

It was a day of small beginnings when that group of 36 Bible Students in Kobe held their first assembly. (Zech. 4:10) Just five years laterin 1932103 colporteurs and publishers in Japan reported activity, placing more than 14,000 books. Today, well-organized public witnessing is being done in Japans metropolitan areas, and nearly 220,000 publishers are letting their light shine throughout the Land of the Rising Sun.From our archives in Japan.