sweet cement of 1935 - a short story
TRANSCRIPT
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Sweet Cement of 1935
He clung to her letter, salty trickles navigating the grooves of his despair. Hillel was
shivering despite the numerous layers that shrouded his convulsing frame. The cold
that dug beneath his blue-grey skin was from something quite different; the piercing
pain of a guilty heart*
WINTER
It was a dark frosted afternoon when Adina and her grandparents moved into the room
downstairs. They didnt carry many possessions, just some worn out leathers books
and a bed. Once unpacked, Adinas grandparents urged her to have a look around the
unit; to get familiar with their new home. It was a lifeless skeleton; unwelcoming and
cold, but it was not known for its comfort, Adina and her grandparents had moved
here for protection.
All four floors were covered in fading peach carpet; a long banister curled down the
stairs and met Adina with an unpolished brass orb. She outstretched her bony hand
and placed it on the orb, running her fingers along the banister as she ascended. Small
white windows lined the corridors, their paint peeling, forming small piles of dusty
debris below each pane. Water stains dotted the carpet like dried out lakes,
corresponding to the bloated paint bubbles on the ceiling. Heavy doors stood with
confidence despite the chipped timber frames that bordered them. Thats when she
saw it, on the third floor; the photos. Multitudes of photos adorned the cold cement
walls that surrounded unit five. In the sepia photos Adina noticed a young boy of
about four; surrounded by loving faces, he was blowing out the candles on a tiny
cake. Compelled by curiosity; Adinas dark eyes moved along the wall, they fell on a
tiny photo stuck up alongside the doorframe. It depicted a reclining figure on a leathercouch holding a small silver box with ribbons, he was alone. The crumpled picture
was barely recognisable but Adina knew it was the same boy from the other pictures.
Then Adina heard movement from within the unit, footsteps against the weathered
floorboards. Without thinking, she grabbed the tiny picture from the doorframe and
hurried downstairs back to her unit.
*
Hillel rose from the floor; his joints arguing against the sudden movement. Slowly his
calloused feet slid against the ground, gravitating towards the locked door. Then he
heard breathing just beyond the thick walls, deep long breaths. He could almost hear
the warm breath coming into contact with his photos; creating miniscule moisture
beads on the faces of his loved ones. Sudden rage penetrated his bloodstream; hereached for the glass door handle hoping to catch his perpetrator. The door swung
open a second too late; Hillel saw nothing but black flowing hair cascading into the
shadows of downstairs. Light steps padded away on the carpet, then disappeared
behind a shut door. His rage softened into curiosity, who was the stranger that had
been so intrigued by the stills of his life?
Hillel turned around to go back inside, but something caught his eye. Actually
absence caught his eye. Because amongst the many photos that layered his outside
wall a small blank square stood out. The stranger had taken a photo from him. He shut
his eyes tight and imagined the wall before. Concentrating hard; he painted reality
within his mind to figure out which one she had taken. It was his last photograph, thefirst of many birthdays alone. Trickles of repressed sadness punctured his heart,
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diluting throughout his body. Slowly he turned around and began descending the
stairs; carefully placing each foot as if to the beat of a silent song. He reached the
door; a brass number two had been quickly nailed into the timber. Small rust particles
dotted the door knocker, flecks of black against the otherwise polished metal. Hillel
paused; uncertainty overcame him; dividing his conscience; should he confront the
thief of his pictorial happiness? Slowly he outstretched his hand, drawing it uptowards the knocker, and extending his thumb and forefinger he went to grab the cold
brass. The hot burning flesh of his fingers was millimetres away when the door
opened suddenly, and there she was extending her arm towards him. She was holding
the photograph; offering it back. Black torrents cascaded past her shoulders, loosely
pinned back to expose her face. Small delicate features clung to her pale skin, which
was slightly speckled with freckles around her eyes. They shone with such
illuminated intensity that one could mistake them for liquid turquoise; swirling
malevolently within her irises. A small smile made itself apparent at the edge of her
mouth. They stood there visually processing one another until Hillels voice finally
shattered the glass pane of their noiseless surroundings.
Why did you take it?Remorse flooded into her features; suddenly she seemed a fraction of her size.
I dont know what overcame me, here have it back, I never should have taken it, I'm
so sorry
She shook her hand in his face, offering the photograph to him. But Hillel did not take
it back immediately, instead a hoarse laugh escaped from his lips; galloping into the
thick air. All at once the tension between them disintegrated and in its place stood the
curiosity that comes with meeting a new person.
*
SPRING
Dew clung to every blade; reflecting the sunlight like the jewels of nature. Shrill
wrens adorned the trees like Christmas decorations; keenly chirping their tune to
anyone who would lend an ear. It had been a few months since their first encounter
and Hillel had invited Adina up to have dinner that night, to start over on good terms.
When Hillel opened the door, Adina smelt a clean shaven smell wafting off his
shoulders. He was wearing a white buttoned shirt and a pair of dusty cord pants;
noticeable time had been spent on his appearance. Smile lines sprang into life; and his
murky eyes diluted so Adina could distinguish pupil from iris. Hillels unruly hair had
been tamed with water and lime juice; splitting his scalp with a sharp line that ended
in the middle of his forehead. Two day stubble had been left along his jaw line;framing his olive features like a rustic masterpiece. At once, a small childish smile
infiltrated his grownup appearance and without delay Hillel moved from the doorway
to showed Adina in.
During the night they exchanged ribbons of casual conversation, eagerly bouncing off
each other like they had always been inseparable friends. Soon the room was full of
childhood memories; they floated within the small enclosure developing a strong
sense of flourishing friendship. As the night progressed this emotion made way for a
feeling both Adina and Hillel were foreign to, and although neither of them could
linguistically explain it; their stolen glances left both of them undesirably exposed.
Hillel had seen the kind of grief a seventeen year old should never have to encounter.By age thirteen all his relations had died from a genetic disease that had been in the
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family for centuries, this left Hillel completely self reliant; and many people would
mistake him for the grownup he reluctantly pretended to be.
*
As Adina left, the infatuation with her presence almost drove him to run after her, but
Hillel resisted. Instead, he slipped in between his thin cotton sheets and lay awake;sifting through the night in his mind; going over the floods of conversation to
desperately preserve every nuance that was exchanged.
The early sun squeezed light down through the Polish valley; dripping into every
corner it could find until finally coming to a small concrete unit block at the end of
the crooked lane. Here the sunlight seemed to stop; hesitant to edge closer.
Hillel rose, splashed on some old clothes and went out into the unit corridor. Here, he
pondered on what to say to Adina; painfully scripting his words in hope of success.
Once his encounter was planned to the last breath, Hillel headed downstairs.
Hillel's common sense was no longer useful; adrenaline was now controlling hismovement. Without realising it, he loudly knocked seven times on the door;
impatiently stamping on the straw doormat. It swung open and a tired face met
Hillel's, but on observing who had roused her; light filtered through Adinas face. The
absence of words followed, and any conversation that was had was through their eyes.
There they stood; locked in a passionate stare that neither of them dare break. All at
once sunlight slowly crept into the hallway; drowning both figures in sharp golden
rays until it became so bright that their silhouettes vanished within the glare.
*
SUMMER
Heavy air emanated throughout the hollow building, resinating as it bounced off each
surface. The grass encroached on the front doorstep of the cement unit; adding colour
to the grey building. Hillel and Adina were entwined on a small leather chair, reading
the paper; apparently unfazed by the unstable situations. Hillel flipped a few pages
and came across the real estate section, his face lit up.
When we get out of this concrete dump, Im going to build us a house out of the
most expensive oak. We can grow old sipping tea on our veranda, which will overlook
the valley and meet the sun each morning as it rises.
Hillel paused; his imaginary handiwork was enviable, even to himself. He continued
to orally present his dwelling of perfection to Adina.And our garden would be a maze of floral beauty wrapped around a small fish pond,
carp would slosh around; eager to be fed. And we could feed them together every
morning, hows that?
He glanced over at Adina, noticing her silence. A stone cold look had infiltrated her
facial features, and she turned to Hillel with worried eyes.
Have you ever thought about what will happen when things get out of control? Did
you forget that I have my grandparents to look after? Hillel, I cant just run away with
you and live in your fantasy house, we cant deny the troubled times we are living in.
If it gets worse I have to take my grandparents to the Lithuanian border; it is safer for
them there
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Adina was out of breath, she hadnt realised she was shouting. A look of sadness
appeared on Hillels face; suddenly flashing to anger as he stood up towering over
Adina.
You are the only family I have, and if you desert me like everyone else did I can
never forgive you
Hillel, what are you talking about? You would come with me; we would travel tosafety together
Just as fast as it had come, the sharp spite within Hillel disappeared. Adina struggled
to withhold such sudden fear, tightly closing her eyes so as not to let the flow of salty
tears escape. Hillel bent down and cradled her, shocked by his lighting aggression.
Adina fell asleep but he continued to hold her until sundown, when he carried her
downstairs to her unit; kissing her softly on the forehead before returning upstairs;
guilt ridden by his actions.
*
AUTUMN
Hues of red and brown dotted the pavement leading up to the unit, they danced withthe wind; falling into small mounds which in turn would spiral upwards again. The
skeletons of summertime trees lined the streets; their bristled branches failing to
provide shelter from the biting wind. Hillel was out cutting firewood for the
upcoming winter for he had promised Adina he would do it. He dawdled along the
pathway dragging his feet against the composting leaf matter; creating tracks which
he could follow back. Some way down the track he came to a clearing, in the centre a
majestic red cedar towered above; it was just like he had pictured it. This was the
wood of perfection which would construct their dream home; he set to work;
determination fuelling his strength.
*
Adina woke and prepared breakfast for her grandparents, carefully rationing each
bowl of porridge until both were perfectly equal. She then set the table and went
outside hoping to pick some very late summer flowers; but there were none; the grass
no longer grew harmoniously with the dandelions; instead it was ridden with dead
autumn leaves. Slightly disappointed but not disheartened Adina made her way back
inside the cold slab building.
As she opened the door, four eager eyes turned her way
Come turn on the radio for us, Adina
She obliged, and clicked on the transmission receiver; carefully turning the large
wheel to pick up a signal; a scratched voice found their ears. The presenter continuedhis bulletin.
Keine jdischen Brgerschaft- No more Jewish citizenship, no more Jewish rights.
SS take control of Germany and head to Poland
Tension within the small unit grew tight, scared eyes met one another. Nothing was
uttered; a sharp silence descended, until finally Adinas grandma sliced it with her
powerful words.
Together we leave right now to survive this horrid offense against man kind
Then she pulled herself out of the armchair and hobbled down the hall to pack her
things. Adinas grandfather followed; shifting his awkward frame around the
furniture.
Adina overheard them conversing in an attempted mute tone.What about the boy?
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In an hour we leave, regardless of wether Hillel is back. Family is everything and we
must preserve what we have left
But Adina is his family, nothing can split them apart; not even this blasted war
If hes back in an hour, thats perfect. But we still leave then no arguments
Cold tears made their way over Adinas cheeks, and she prayed that Hillel would
return fast. Reassuring herself; she went to pack up her few belongings.
*
The cedar stood there laughing at Hillel; humoured by his feeble attempts to bring it
down. But determination was on Hillels side, and he silently vowed to return to the
unit with the timber, no matter how long it took. He paused and stood back; eyeing off
his victim. He knew the tree would be his before sundown; he couldnt wait to see
Adinas face; first irritated by his lateness then overcome by admiration for his efforts.
For want of her affection; he set to work; carving around the giant burgundy base.
*
Sitting at the small iron table, Adina scribbled a long letter and sealed it; running the
lettering with her tears. She dashed up the carpeted stairs and into his unit, gentlyAdina put it on his pillow silently hoping he would understand. Stinging pain filtered
through her body and she struggled to contain herself. Then she unwillingly headed
for the door; glancing back at the unit. She stood there for a moment too long,
attempting to take everything in; the sound of the rebellious dripping tap; the crinkled
sheets on the floor; the aroma of the sweet cement- but this mental snapshot wasnt
enough. As she exited Adina took a picture from the wall, it was the same one she
took before. She folded it up and placed it in her dress pocket; this way Hillel would
travel with her.
Downstairs she picked up the bags and placed them in the trunk of a small illegal
migration truck; assisting her grandparents into the back, then jumping in herself. The
concrete unit block faded into the distance until it was no more than a grey speck on
the horizon. The late afternoon light ricocheted off the forest trees and into Adinas
eyes, one particular tree caught the majority of the light; illuminating its bright red
hue across the countryside. This was the last thing Adina saw before the truck turned
the corner. Clutching Hillels picture; she got below the canvass and prepared herself
for the dark journey to safety.
*
Hillel tumbled into the empty room; arms full of wood; wearing a pearly grin to greet
Adina. But only hollow echoes met him. Aside from an old radio the whole house was
barren; a drought of all life. A pang of grief descended upon his body and he
collapsed, scattering chopped wood on the dusty floor. His sadness malevolentlyspiralled into burning anger; lighting his face on fire as he pictured her leaving. Just
then there came a knock on the dor, it slowly swing open and standing before his
crackling figure were two officers. Hillel had heard of these men; they were trained to
hurt his kind. Their identical uniforms were crisply ironed; large red embroidery was
sewn onto the fronts saying SS. As they stepped inside; the oiled leather of their
boots squeaked against the wood.
Where are the owners of this unit? Mr and Mrs Ezra?
The other one chimed in
If you cooperate, we wont be harsh
His face suddenly stiffened into a fiery stare
But if you choose to remain silent, you willbe dealt with accordingly
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The burning hatred that comes with loss filled Hillels heart; overriding any previous
affection he had so genuinely conveyed. Slowly he stood to his feet and a cynical look
entered his face. The Hillel which now spoke was not the one who had fallen in love;
in fact a completely different person answered the officers.
They have made there way to the Lithuanian border, just today
A nod, then shuffling boots made their way out of the room. They muttered to oneanother as they left.
This time were going to kill those filthy Jew runaways, along with that young whore
that protects them
Reality crashed down on Hillel, what had he done? Guilt so strong was brought down
upon his shoulders as he pictured the events to come. Hillel realised that he had just
sealed the fate of his only love, his piercing scream emanated throughout the cold
building; shattering the solemn silence that comes with desertion. He stumbled up the
stairs, into his room and collapsed on the bed, drowning in the floods of emotion that
his head was ridden with. Then he noticed a crinkled letter beneath his head, obvious
tears had run Adinas hand writing. Pealing open the seal, his eyes read what they
could before the liquid within them was too much to depict anything.
He clung to her letter, salty trickles navigating the grooves of his despair. Hillel was
shivering despite the numerous layers that shrouded his convulsing frame. The cold
that dug beneath his blue-grey skin was from something quite different; the piercing
pain of a guilty heart. An in an instant movement he reached under his mattress,
revealing a small silver box with ribbons. Lifting the lid Hillel tightly grasped a rusty
revolver, silently placing in the bullet. A bullet for Adina meant a bullet for him, this
bullet was for the pain he had caused; the grief; the sorrow that had oozed from within
his soul and into Adinas life.
And taking one last breath of guilty air, he placed the barrel against his temple and
squeezed the small trigger. His cold body fell at once towards the cement, the sound
of the impact resonated within the building; reaching the downstairs rooms before
evaporating completely.
3184 words by Asha Forsyth 2009