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The Dartmouth Review March 4, 2013

Dartmouth’s Only Independent Newspaper

Volume 32, Issue 12

March 4, 2013

The Hanover Review, Inc.P.O. Box 343

Hanover, NH 03755

The Dartmouth Review

Winter Carnival 2013

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Selingo Talks Future of Higher Education

Ms. Sohr is a freshman at the College and News Editor of The Dartmouth Review.

By Caroline Sohr

As part of the new “Leading Voices in Higher Edu-

cation” lecture series, Chronicle of Higher Education

Editor-at-Large Jeffrey Selingo spoke at the College on

February 19. He discussed the current trends of higher

education, his vision for the college of the future, and what

all of this means for Dartmouth in particular. And don’t

worry—he doesn’t think the liberal arts are dead quite yet.

While the internet has certainly made it easier to com-municate, research, and share information at colleges, Selingo

believes it has also disrupted the traditional model of higher

education. As technology and demographics have changed,

students’ educational needs have also shifted. Today’s students

are much more used to multitasking and working in “dynamic”

learning environments than their predecessors. These students

ultimately expect a similar experience from universities.

Therefore, it is not surprising that higher education has

seen some changes over the past few years, for which Selingo

offers the 2008 housing market crash as the likely cause. After

the crash sent our economy into a massive recession, most

individuals’ wealth and family income decreased. In addition,

both state and federal governments were forced to cut their

budgets, causing states to decrease their funding of higher

education and Washington to consider cutting research grants

and the Pell Grant program. In turn, tuition began eating up a

larger and larger share of families’ average incomes (23.1%

in 2001 versus 37.7% in 2010) as families began paying

more out of pocket for their children’s educations, causing

the cost of college to become a “front burner issue” for many.

In addition, the ease and rapidity with which information

can be shared over the Internet has led some to develop alter-

natives to the traditional college experience. These so-called

MOOCs, or massive

open online courses,

are becoming in-

creasingly prevalent.

However, their future

large-scale role in

higher education is

still very unclear.

Selingo suggests that the economic downturn and recent

technological advances have caused ve major forces to de-

velop in the eld of higher education. First, many colleges

are, in fact, losing money. Many colleges have a hard time

attracting students, causing their cash ows to decrease or

remain stagnant while their expenditures have increased,

largely due to an increased focus on student amenities.

Selingo encourages us to consider whether rock-climbing

walls and other such amenities are really necessary to enhance

our educations. Furthermore, state governments are playing

a smaller and smaller role in public higher education and

there are fewer full-paying students. At the same time, the

development of online courses has undermined our common

understanding of the purpose or denition of higher education.

Finally, and most importantly, many have begun

to wonder whether college is still a good investment.

Although statistics and studies continue to prove that

people with bachelor’s degrees

make more money and are

more frequently employed

than those without a college

diploma, the ever-increasing

cost of higher education has

caused many to reconsider whether the traditional college

experience is still “worth it.”

While many have an idyllic

and romantic vision of col-

lege (think leafy quads and

grand, Gothic and Neolithic

build ings) , this is far from

today’s reality. In fact, four in

ve students feel that they are

“drifting” through their educa-

tions, 33 percent of students

transfer school at least once,

and 400,000 drop out entirely.

However, Selingo said that

despite the trends and challeng-

es, we have only seen true in-

novation “around the edges” as

our rankings-obsessed culture

dissuades many institutions

from changing their teach-

ing methods and experiences

because doing so may cause a school to drop a few spots

down the U.S. News and World Report “Best Colleges” list.

Yet, while he does not believe there is a “one

size ts all” solution to these current prob-

lems, Selingo is optimistic about the future,

suggesting colleges evolve towards what he

calls a new “ecosystem” in higher education.

Selingo noted that he does not believe

residential colleges will be replaced by

online courses or that MOOCs are neces-sarily the answer to the challenges posed to higher educa-

tion. Instead, his proposal

focuses on “blending” be-

tween high school and

college, an increased value

on real world experiences,

and wider usage of MOOCs

and hybrid courses, which

combine online and tradi-

tional learning methods.

In general, American

high school curriculums

are highly structured. Al-

though students are given some freedom to choose their

classes or activities, most take a standard set of courses

prescribed by their school with guidance from their par-ents. Once these students arrive at college, they face

a barrage of courses, opportunities, and distractions.

Just as programs like Teach for America offer recent col-

lege graduates opportunities to transition into the work force,

Selingo encourages colleges to

redesign and restructure their

rst year experiences to develop

more pathways for students to

take to through their educations.

Selingo also encourages

colleges to certify experiences

outside of the classrooms, such

as internships. By encouraging

students to develop more “real

world skills” instead of purely

accumulate credits, Selingo

believes that colleges will pro-

duce graduates better equipped

and qualied for the future.

It is for this reason

Selingo holds that the liberal

arts and traditional college ex-

perience are still valuable. They

allow students to work closely

with faculty, gain global per-

spectives, and focus on their

specic interests in a way that

MOOCs cannot. Nonetheless,

Selingo believes MOOCs and

hybrid courses are important

because the y provide more

exibility in curriculum and

allow students to work at their own pace, which in-

creases efciency and productivity.

While Selingo believes Dartmouth’s future is more

secure than that of many other institutions, he nonethe-

less holds that the College will have to adapt to some of

the current trends as we look toward the future and our

250th anniversary in 2019. He encouraged the College to

increase the quality and affordability of a Dartmouth educa-

tion in order to continue to attract the brightest students.

I am more than skeptical that MOOCs will ever play asignicant role in the Dartmouth experience. Of course so

many students ock to

Dartmouth for just the

reason that it provides

what MOOCs neces-

sarily cannot emulate:

the liberal arts college

experience, direct ac-

cess to faculty and all.

Nonetheless, Selingo’s

talk was interesting and,

surprisingly enough, en-

couraging. While some

continue to lament the death of the liberal arts, Selingo seems

to believe that their future is still bright. His forthcoming book,

College (Un)Bound: The Future of Higher Education and What It Means for Students, will be released May 7. n

—Chronicle of Higher Education

Editor-at-Large Jeffrey Selingo —

Letter to the Editor:

Dear Adam,

The current TDR is very good, but wrong on John Dickey.

Dickey knew that the faculty had to be improved. When I arrived in 1947 I found that many of the professors were

inferior to the teachers at Stuyvesant High School in Manhattan.

The most spectacular addition to the faculty was Eugene Rosenstock-Huessey. He is still a subject of discussion, and Professor Pease is planning towrite a book about him. Rosenstock-Huessey had fought in the Kaiser’s Army. And he would have looked right in a spiked helmet. He had his

existential experience in a fox hole in no man’s land outside Verdun.

In 1947 the war had recently ended. And Dickey tried to make students aware of the world outside our borders. He started the Great Issues

course for seniors. He brought outstanding guest speakers, such as Reinhold Niebuhr and important political readers.

Rosenstock, as we called him, changed students’ lives. He said that speech is the concrete representation of spirit: “You speak and I respond,

and I am changed.”

Cheers,Jeff Hart

Of course so many students ock to

Dartmouth for just the reason that it

provides what MOOCs necessarily cannot

emulate: the liberal arts college experi-

ence, direct access to faculty and all.

Selingo believes the internet has disrupted

the traditional model of higher education.

As technology and demographics have changed,

students’ educational needs have also shifted. To-

day’s students are much more used to multitasking

and working in “dynamic” learning environments

than their predecessors. These students ultimately

expect a similar experience from universities.

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13


March 4, 2013 The Dartmouth Review

As Dartmouth chases the goal of recognition as a fully

resourced university, it can’t seem to hurtle itself fast enough

towards change.

“Lest the old traditions fail” cautions us against this

long march. That same phrase adorns the plaque markingthe Old Pine and features prominently into the Alma Mater.

Nowadays, it seems like that warning has been tossed to the

wind, as each new day brings talk of unprecedented change

to Dartmouth College.

The term “change” must not be taken as synonymous

with “adaptation.” Indeed the latter is natural concomitant

of Dartmouth’s status as an elite academic institution—the

College must develop alongside the world around it.

But the change that the administration espouses is not of

this ilk. It is Procrustean, abandoning core values and severing

the College from its intrinsic worth.

Dartmouth is chopped and stretched to

meet a standard that is at best undened

and at worst a recapitulation of “the

Harvardization of Dartmouth.”

But can the College on the Hillafford to lose all that falls between

the cracks? The Dimensions show,

designed and run by freshmen to at-

tract prospective students, is the latest

facet of the Dartmouth experience to

face the chopping block. Sanctions

against the Greek system also pro-

vide substance to the claim that the

administration attacks tradition in

the name of progress. So too, is the

slow sanitization of the College’s big

weekends.

Now consider the tradition that

is most threatened by the College’s

university push. It is the same tradition that is most integral

to our school, and one that binds together all loyal sons anddaughters of Dartmouth: the fundamental, unwavering com-

mitment to undergraduate educa-

tion.

Without that commitment

at the forefront of Dartmouth’s

mission, the College is ruined and

replaced by a façade. A school that

does not hold its obligation for

teaching in the highest esteem is

not a school at all, but little more

than a congregation of apping

mouths.

This is why Charlotte Johnson must be removed from her

station as Dean of the College: her actions reveal a mindset

that places more importance on diversity and inclusivity than

the academic experience.

This is why we can hold hope for the incoming presi-

dency—Dr. Hanlon’s track record and stated intentions

both reafrm the commitment to education.

This is why when Paul Mirengoff ’71 proclaims,

“Dartmouth is lost,”The Review

is inclined to agree.Ironically, Mirengoff’s sentiment came in a piece

condemning The Review for running an article entitled

“What We Need from President Hanlon.” Mirengoff took

issue with the article’s focus on student and social life,

as opposed to educational issues. While The Review of-

fers the caveat that said article was written to elucidate

tangible improvements that Dr. Hanlon can quickly

institute, we wholeheartedly agree with Mr. Mirengoff

that education is of paramount importance to the College,

and any appeal to the leader of this institution must be

fully cognizant of that fact.

Traditions at Dartmouth are

being sacr iced in the race to-

wards university recognition. The

legacy of undergraduate educa-

tion at Dartmouth is one of thesetraditions, it is being threatened,

and its corruption is tantamount

to the corruption of Dartmouth,

herself.

Mirengoff deems “the leftist

rot that has spread through many

of the humanities department

[sic]” as the primary threat fac-

ing education at Dartmouth. The

Review offers an alternative: the

university dream. Dartmouth is

fast abandoning her traditions

in favor of wider appeal. If the

legacy of commutment to educa-

tion is nothing more than one of these traditions, albeit

a consummately fundamental one, then this chippingaway of Old Dartmouth poses just as much of a threat

to the academics as it does

to any other facet of the

College.

Ultimately the con-

tention of Paul Mirengoff

and that of The Review are

one in the same: without the

commitment to undergradu-

ate education, Dartmouth

College ceases to exist.

“Your business here is

learning,” President John Sloan Dickey was well known

to tell freshmen.

“Your business here is teaching,” we remind the ad-

ministration of Dartmouth College. n

George A. Mendoza Features Editors

Editorial

Subscribe: $40The Dartmouth Review

P.O. Box 343Hanover, N.H. 03755

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Contributions are

tax-deductible.

www.dartreview.com

Benjamin M. Riley President

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FoundersGreg Fossedal, Gordon Haff,

Benjamin Hart, Keeney Jones“Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win great tri-umphs, even though checkered by failure, than to takerank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor

suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.” —Theodore Roosevelt

Special Thanks to William F. Buckley, Jr.

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Contributors

Mean-Spirited, Cruel and Ugly Legal Counsel

The Editors of The DarTmouTh r eview welcome cor-

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Submit letters by mail or e-mail: [email protected]

Blake S. Neff, Jay M. Keating III, Michael T. Haughey,

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Wilcox, Paul Trethaway, Charles Jang, William D. Peters

Cover photo courtesy of Rauner Library

A Grimm Carnival, indeed.

Thomas L. Hauch • Rebecca Hecht •

Nicholas P. Desatnick

Managing Editors

Elizabeth A. Reynolds • Taylor CathcartVice Presidents

Coleman E. Shear Executive Editor

Nick Duva • Caroline Sohr News Editors

Martin Anderson, Patrick Buchanan, Theodore Cooper-

stein, Dinesh D’Souza, Michael Ellis, Robert Flanigan,

John Fund, Kevin Robbins, Gordon Haff, Jeffrey Hart,

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Steven Menashi, James Panero, Hugo Restall, Roland

Reynolds, Weston Sager, Emily Esfahani Smith,

R. Emmett Tyrrell, Charles Dameron

TheDartmouth Review

Selingo Talks Future of Higher Education Page 2Week in Review Pages 4 & 52013 Winter Carnival Recap Page 6A Veteran’s First Carnival Page 7Short Stories Explore Wartime Page 7Men’s Tennis Rises to Tough Schedule Page 8Men’s & Women’s Squash Benched Page 8F. Scott Fitzgerald Visits Hanover Pages 9, 10 & 11Last Word & Mixology Page 12

Adam I.W. Schwartzman

Without the commitment to undergradu-

ate education at the forefront of Dart-

mouth’s mission, the College is ruined and

replaced by a façade. A school that does not

hold its obligation for teaching in the highest

esteem is not a school at all, but little more

than a congregation of apping mouths.

Chloe M. Teeter Media Editor

Hilary Hamm • Kirk Jing Associate Editors

Making the Grade

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13



Stinson’s: Your Pong HQCups, Balls, Paddles, Accessories

(603) 643-6086 | www.stinsonsvillagestore.com

New York Monuments

Remain Closed

Ellis Island and the Statue of Liberty have

been closed to tourists ever since Hurricane Sandy

wreaked havoc on the eastern United States. The

twelve-acre Liberty Island, located a mile south

of lower Manhattan, was in the direct path of

the storm, resulting in the submersion of about

75% of the island in water. The Statue of Liberty

itself did not suffer any damage, but the utilities

and power system of the island did. Secretary of

the Interior Ken Salazar estimates that repairs to

the island will cost $59 million. Salazar issued a

statement in December saying, “We’re going to

get this done as soon as we possibly can because

[the Statue of Liberty is] such an important icon

for New York and America.”

No reopening date has been announced, but

eager Statue of Liberty acionados can follow

updates regarding the recovery on all major so-

cial media outlets. The Facebook page for the

monument has 165,409 “likes,” indicating that

enthusiasts will anxiously wait for a denite time

when they will be able to grace the brick pathways

surrounding Lady Liberty again.Due to spending cuts in Washington and the

Great Sequester, the reopening could see larger

delays than expected. In the past, the American

people have mobilized to nance the assembly

and preservation of the monument. When thestatue rst arrived from France in June 1885,

the assembly was delayed for ten months due to

inadequate funding for the pedestal. In order to

erect this symbolic monument, schoolchildren

across the country collected $100,000 in pennies

to pay for it. Hopefully such drastic measures can

remain in the past.

Four Loko Settles

Case

Noted for its quick rise to fame among high

schoolers and college kids, Four Loko alcoholic

energy drink has been a perpetual object of health

and safety related scrutiny. This so-called “black-

out in a can” has been blamed for heart attacks,

seizures, and even death. In Four Loko’s original

formula, each can contained 23.5-ounces of caf-

feine, guanine, taurine, and alcohol.

The Federal Trade Commission ultimately required

Chicago-based Phusion Projects, the manufacturer

of Four Loko, to append the formula.

Two weeks ago, Phusion Projects settled claims

of deceptive marketing by agreeing to redesign

Four Loko cans so they can be resealed and con-

sumed later.Phusion is also required to place an alcohol-

facts panel on the side of each drink. One wonders

what will come next in the battle between Four

Loko and the Federal Trade Commission.

The Week in Review

Carnival Sees Second

Chili Cook-Off

The snowy Saturday of Winter Carnival saw

contestants from fraternities, sororities, and res-

taurants in Hanover compete in the Second AnnualChili Cook-off. Phi Delta Alpha, Inter-Fraternity

Council, Panhellenic Council, the Dartmouth

Greek Letter Organizations and Societies, Kappa

Kappa Gamma, and Delta Delta Delta sponsored

the event.

Aaron Goldman ’15, Taylor Cathcart ’15 and

Nicholas Cunha ’15 of Phi Delta Alpha fraternity

organized the event with Ruth Kett of the GLOS

Ofce.

The Chili Cook-off was founded by Jacob

Wijnberg ‘12 and donates all proceeds to the

Fisher House Foundation. The Foundation builds

homes near military bases and Veteran Affairs

medical centers, which are designed for familieswhose loved ones are receiving treatment nearby.

Wijnberg is currently serving in the U.S. Army.

In the midst of such volatile relations between

the College administration and Greek systems,

these cosponsored events serve to ease tensions.

It is tting that the event benetted a char -

ity centered on military affairs. Historically,

Dartmouth has always been more supportive of

the United States military than her peer institu-

tions. To wit, our Reserve Ofcers’ Training Corps

has endured continuously since 1951. President

Emeritus James Wright is also a noted advocate

of the American veteran.

The heavy snow and strong hill winds were

not enough to keep people away from the Cook-

off, even though it was held outdoors. “The event

ended up being a big success and things went more

smoothly than we’d expected,” Cathcart said. “We

were all impressed by the number of volunteers

that showed up to help set up. The event wouldn’t

have been possible without them or the careful

craftsmanship of the competitors.”

Psi Upsilon won the campus organization

category and EBA’s won the restaurant category

for the second consecutive year. Many members

of the student body and employees of the College

attended. When asked about the turn out Cathcartsaid, “It’s a great event—everyone loves chili

in the winter—so we were glad to continue and

expand [the Cook-off] and we’re looking forward

to doing the same next year.”

“We met at the keg jump.”

-Col. James Donovan ‘39

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13



The Week in Review

Lehigh Student Sues

over C+

Attorneys for Megan Thode, the Lehigh Univer-

sity student who sued over her C+, are appealing to

a higher court. Thode, the daughter of a professor at

the university, has attributed her poor participation

grade in the class to sexual discrimination, charging

that she was treated unfairly by the professor based

on her support of gay and lesbian causes.

Certainly, there are legions of college students

in humanities courses living in fear of being dis-criminated against for their support of gay mar-

riage. Academia is widely accepted to be a bastion

of conservatism and intolerance.

Regardless, after Northampton County judge

Emil Giordano squashed her lawsuit, Thode’s at-

torney reled under the rationale that Thode’s C+

made it difcult to complete her graduate degree,

thereby ending her dream of becoming a counselor.

Megan Thode now works as a drug and alco-

hol counselor after receiving a master’s degree in

human development.

Lawyers representing Lehigh University

claimed that Thode regularly broke out in pro-

fanity and tears in class, causing her to score low participation grade. Thode claims that she engaged

in no behavior that could be considered unac-ceptable. With today’s standards of behaviors,

The Review notes that these are not necessarily

mutually exclusive statements.

Cornell Hazing Continues

Over the course of February 28th to March

1st, the administration at Cornell university ad-

ministration charged three fraternities with hazing.

Chi Psi, Sigma Nu, and Delta Phi were all placed

on probation after hazing allegations were made

against them by various members of the student

body. These allegations, physical hazing in thecase of Sigma Nu and Delta Phi and psycho-

logical in the case of Chi Psi, occurred the week

before ofcial initiation was to occur. The three

fraternities will be reviewed by the Fraternity and

Sorority Review Board or the Cornell Judicial

Administrator. Until that time all are to remain

on suspension by the University, and Sigma Nu

and Chi Psi will also face suspension by their

national headquarters.

As the Cornell Daily Sun reported, the vice

president for judicial affairs of the Interfraternity

Council said, “At the same time, [the allegations

are] concerning enough that we don’t want to

allow anything further to continue until we havea better understanding of the situation,” yet the

suspensions were “not any indication of guilt.”

This comes a little over one month after three other

fraternities, Tau Epsilon Phi, Phi Sigma Kappa,

and Pi Kappa Phi, were suspended by the Cornell

administration in January on allegations of hazing.

Since January, the University has been working

towards stricter regulations of how freshman are

incorporated into the Greek Houses. Travis Apgar,the Robert G. Engel Associate Dean of Students,

trying to turn this into a positive PR situation,

remarked that “[t]he fact that we have community

members who recognize and intervene to spare

peers and community members from hazing is

fantastic. We are pleased to see Cornell demon-

strate that it is a community of action takers, not

bystanders.” It will be interesting to follow how

the dynamics of Greek Life at Cornell University

changes as a new generation of students are ready

to notice and react to instances of pledge hazing.

Harvard Cheating

Scandal Concludes

Academic sanctions were issued to approxi-

mately 60 Harvard University undergraduates in

the aftermath of a major cheating scandal. In total,

some 70 students withdrew from the school for

various lengths of time.

In the spring semester of 2012, a Harvard teach-

ing assistant grew suspicious of shared answers

on a take home test. The course, “Introduction to

Congress” was a lecture class in the government

department with nearly 300 students. Among un-dergraduates, it was considered an easy A.

Ultimately, over 100 students were implicated

in the scandal, which posed difculties for a number

of sports teams. In particular, two co-captains of

the basketball team were dropped from the roster

after they were forced to withdraw.

Predictably, responses to the cheating scandal

has been mixed. Some fault the university for a

cheating policy considered unclear and obtuse.

Others support the academic sanctions as a im-

portant and necessary response to the violations.

Prominent alumni including Thomas Stemberg,

founder of Staples, have been openly critical of the

administration and president Drew Gilpin Faustas well as assistant professor Matthew B. Platt. n

“He hasn’t been the same since the polar bear plunge.”

-Col. James Donovan ‘39

“No one, I think, with any sense of history and

propriety, can come to Dartmouth for the rst time

and not recall Daniel Webster’s remark that it is ‘but

a small college but there are those of us who have

loved it.’ I am sure Dartmouth students have heard

this passage many times. The remark still moves

my soul whenever I come across it. Dartmouth

still boasts that it is the smallest of the Ivy League

schools, though, with some four to six thousand

students, it is only ‘small’ when compared to, say,

Ohio State or NYU or Texas.Dartmouth’s smallness is mindful to me of

Chesterton’s remark that Rome was not rst great

and then men loved her. Rather they rst loved her,

then, as a result, she became great. To stay sane, we

always need to get our metaphysical priorities right.

That was Webster’s point too, I think. Much is to

be said for a man who loves a woman because she

is beautiful. But, as Yves Simon said, much more

is to be said of him when he still faithfully loves

her when she has lost her beauty.”

-Reverend James V. Schall, S.J. in a speech given

at Dartmouth College on May 4, 2012.

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13



2013 Winter Carnival Recap

Mr. Haughey is a sophomore at the College and a con-

tributor to The Dartmouth Review.

By Michael T. Haughey

The magic of Winter Carnival seems already a distant

memory, along with the winter itself. As spring’s verdant

tendrils creep into the Upper Valley, we remember the fallout

of last weekend’s merriment. While many students felt am-

bivalence towards the tradition of Winter Carnival and just

enjoyed the three-day weekend as a hiatus from schoolwork,

some old traditions were still enjoyed and new ones contin-ued to bring excitement to the student body. The Carnival

seemed to be staring down the barrel of warm weather for

the second year in a row, as the grass on the green shone

through the soupy remnants of melting snow. But although

the days where droves of girls

arrived by train seem long

forgotten, this weekend was

a testament to the resolve of

Dartmouth students to have a

good time.

Kicking off the weekend

was Wednesday’s Country for

a Cause concert at Alumni

Hall, benefitting David’s

House, a local charity that

helps support families of children being treated at Hitchcock Medical Center. Concert

organizer Chris Zhao ’13 said, “We were so glad to be able

to put together the second annual Country for a Cause. It’s

so rare that you can be a part of something so fun, but also

so rewarding.” Despite Dartmouth’s dubious track record

with bringing good acts up to Hanover, headliners Florida

Georgia Line played a great show, sending the sell out

crowd into a frenzied mosh pit with their hit song “Cruise”.

Students shed their boat shoes for cowboy boots as the band

rocked the Top of the Hop and brought a southern flavor to

our northern festival. Concert attendee Willie Maritz ’15

said afterwards, “That Florida Georgia Line party was the

perfect way to kick off the weekend.”

Tracing back to its founding, Winter Carnival is centered

on a ski tournament between various northeastern schools.

This series of races takes place over the course of the week-

end, and despite initial being initially postponed due to high

winds, they were held as usual. Both the Nordic and Alpine

ski teams gave a strong showing. As skier Hunter Black ‘15

said, “Our Nordic teams have a lot of momentum and are

skiing extremely well. We had great performances out of our

women’s alpine team, and while the men’s alpine team had

some issues, but got great performances out of Ian Macomber

’13 and Ben Morse ’14

which helped us finish

second on the weekend.”

Adverse weather was

also unable to stop students

from enjoying activities

outside. Many lined up at

Robinson hall for a winter

carnival hat and a bone-

warming barbecue meal

from Big Fatty’s Restau-

rant.Other traditions still held strong, including the polar

bear swim, one of the more sadistic tradi tions enjoyed by

students. Freshmen and upperclassman alike who feared

missing their icy opportunity lined the street down to Oc-

com Pond to the hole cut in the ice. Jay Keating ’15, who

took his first plunge this first year, commented, “It was the

most physically shocking endeavor I’ve ever experienced”.

The resurgence of the human dog sled race on the Green

was accompanied by a large student showing, both of racers

and supporters. As some may remember, last year’s com-

petition was cancelled because of a lack of snow. This year

brought a return to the f lair-filled race, where some teams

came to win and others just for a good time. As competitor

Rennie Song ’15 put it, “we knew victory was out of reach

so we decided we should lose with dignity and grace. We

made history as the first team that couldn’t complete the

course.”

As many noted this year, the usually iconic snow

sculpture paled in comparison to memories and photos of

years past, last year ’s cupcake debacle excluded. However,

many do not realize that small core of no more than three

or four committed architects create virtually the entire

sculpture. Led by Will Baird ‘15, the group tried their best

to recreate the eerie imagery reminiscent of the old Grimm

fairy tales, a sculpture of little red riding hood facing down

the big bad wolf. Due to lack of manpower and wavering

weather conditions, the sculpture amounted to what can

only be described as a strangely buxom Russian doll next

to an oversized rat. Baird had this to say about the restric-

tions and regulations he and his team faced while building

the sculptures: “People complain about how the sculptures

aren’t as good as they used to be, but in the times they’re

referring to a significant portion of the student body came

out to help, and there were fewer restrictions on what the

sculpture could and couldn’t be. For example, we’re not

really allowed to have overhangs or a supporting internal

structure. Those factors, combined with the lack of natural

snow, make a student-built sculpture really difficult. So we’remuch more limited, both aesthetically and in our resources,

than past sculptures have been.”

As for evening activities, many fraternities spent the

duration of the big weekend on social probation levied by

the administration. Yet the resolve to still party was held firm

by all. An Alpha Chi Alpha beach party and Psi Upsilon Jack

Wills-sponsored party were held without alcohol.

Sunday night, as the sun faded across the snow-swept

green along with many an Advil suppressed headache, the

return to academia crept into the collective student commu-

nity. The four-day bender came to a close, replaced by the

more mundane realities of looming exams and papers. Let

the twelve-week countdown to Green Key commence. n

Led by Will Baird ‘15, the group tried their

best to recreate the eerie imagery reminis-

cent of the old Grimm fairytales, a sculpture of

little red riding hood facing down the big bad

wolf. Due to lack of manpower and wavering

weather conditions, the sculpture amounted

to what can only be described as a strangely

buxom Russian doll next to an oversized rat.

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13



By Alex Kane

In “Play The Game” by Colby Buzzell, an Iraq veteran

adjusts to home life with feelings of emptiness and an alco-

hol problem. In “New Me” by Andrew Slater, powerful and

disturbing dreams haunt an Afghanistan veteran with a brain

injury. In “Redeployment” by Phil Klay, Dartmouth ’05,

soldiers shoot dogs on sight.

These are only four of the stories in Fire and Forget:

Short Stories from the Long War , a short ction collection that

includes works written by everyone from a Green Beret to a

military wife. The collection lacks a consistent, underlying

ideology or political message; each story simply expresses

a different, complex perspective that unites seamlessly into

a whole.

The work will satisfy anyone with even a vague inter-

est in war ction. Filled with struggles with the mundane

and deadly alike, the stories provide a broad examination of

human existence. The book’s focus on the experience of the

modern American soldier is quite welcome, as it has been

overlooked in recent representations of the post 9/11 wars. In

TV’s “Homeland” and lm’s “Zero Dark Thirty,” subterfuge

and intrigue, sexier and more palatable to the public, dominate

the plot with the experience of the soldier as faint backdrop.

In “Zero Dark Thirty,” for instance,

when Seal Team Six is not busy

killing Osama Bin Laden, it is

characterized almost exclusively

through a scene where the men

play horseshoes, a few speaking

jauntily while the rest stare grufy

into space.

“Fire and Forget” tells stories that popular mediums ought

to focus on, all the while doing an excellent job of telling them

itself. Its stories are brutal and conveyed uninchingly. All

of the writers grapple with the task of understanding these

wars and making them intelligible to a sometimes detached

American public.

While the style varies between authors, the quality of

the writing is unilaterally high. Mariette Kalinowski’s prose

ows smoothly in The Train, pull-

ing the reader through the narrator’s

memories of losing a friend and fellow

solider as she sits on the 7 train. Brian

Turner’s language in “The Wave That

Takes Them Under” takes on an artistic

quality as the experience of soldiers in

a sandstorm is reduced to a mixture

light, dark and fear. “Redeployment”is narrated in terse, profanity-riddled

thoughts that revolve around his the

author’s time on active duty.

This book is not wholly grim,

though. “Poughkeepsie” by Perry

O’Brien and “When Engaging Targets,

Remember” by Gavin Ford Kovite serve

as comic additions to the anthology.

The former follows an AWOL soldier,

bent on attacking the college of a girl that rejected him with

an army of rabbits. In the latter, the reader chooses between

different numbered passages when a convoy the narrator is

defending is threatened by an advancing vehicle. The options

are all funny, mostly embarrassing, and none of them end

well.

But the real power of the anthology lies in its serious side.

“Television” by Roman Skaskiw and“The Train, and Rede-

ployment” easily rank among the best the anthology has to

offer. Each describes people placed through harrowing and, for

the reader as well as the characters,

haunting experiences.

“Television” begins with an IED

attack on the road that fails to take

the lives of any US soldiers targeted.

A local boy, who may or may not

have set off the device, is shot and

injured critically in the altercation.

There is a pervasive sense of helplessness in the story. This

is the only real action these soldiers have seen, as they oth-

erwise have had no real effect on the course of the war. To

underscore the futility of their role, they are compelled to

ask the forgiveness of a broken family. “The Train,” unique

as the sole representation of a female soldier’s perspective,

presents a character truly damaged by her experiences in the

war. She rides New York’s 7 train to forget herself, and the

close friend she failed to save. Kalin-

owski beautifully constructs an ailing

relationship between this soldier and

her mother to frame the tragic story

around.

“Redeployment” is perhaps the

best of them all. The rst line of the

story, “We shot dogs” is just one of

many the narrator shocks us with. Ashe reacquaints himself with home, his

memories of service, which include

some of the most disturbing scenes

described in the anthology, from over-

seas incessantly bubble to the surface.

The narrator notes instances in the past

where he feared his experiences would

“break” him, but Klay gives the sense

that something inside the narrator may

already have broken.

To make special note of these three stories is not to make

little of the others. Each writer weaves a captivating narrative

worthy of standing alone. As a collection, however, Fire and

Forget adeptly captures the human element in ghting our

wars overseas and the struggle in coming home again. n

By William D. Peters

As an army veteran, I admire Dartmouth’s strong ap-

preciation for tradition. It is something I looked forward to

when I began at the College last fall. But Dartmouth hasn’t

been all smiles, bake sales and owered dresses—oh no!

This land of the elite has surprised many times over in my

short attendance. My fellow students have shown me that the

work hard, play hard culture exists outside of the military.

I had survived my first homecoming, which

proved to be four days of drunken shenanigans.

I thought I was in the clear.

I now know better, because Winter Carni-

val schooled me, and it schooled me big time.

I was not groomed for a place like Dartmouth, nor

did I ever expect to be a part of such an amazing institu-

tion. But I’m here now and getting everything I can out of

it. I often nd myself to be the oldest person I the room (I

am eight years older than some students). If I’m not being

asked about the Mandarin Chinese on my forearms, I’m

usually asked my thoughts on the Dartmouth social scene.

Unt i l Winter Carn ival , I d idn’ t have a

good answer. Now, at least I have a good story.

The first night of Carnival,

Thursday, can be summed up withone word: inebriation. Several hours

of pong (which I am horrible at),

ip-cup, quick sixes, and a whole

lot of laughter led me to an early wake up, hazy memo-

ries, and a bedfellow who shall remain nameless. Win!

Later that morning I notched my second big Dartmouth

tradition following the Homecoming bonre: the polar

bear plunge at Occom Pond. Ah, how my bowels taunted

me just as I got to end of the line. I’m proud to say that,

thanks to motivation from my comrades and a few half na-

ked coeds, I did not back out. What a sobering experience

that was; literally, I was still drunk from the night before.

Friday night saw sing-

ing, drinking, and a drunken

fireman-carry race across the

Green. After all parties failed

to complete the length of the

Green, the race devolved into

a snowball fight. Fortunately,

Mother Nature had provided a

measure of snow without the

p o wer o u t ag es seen ac ro ss New En g lan d .

I relocated to Beta Alpha Omega Fraternity where

I found myself immediately submerged in a raging

sea of freshman. They laughed and danced and drank,

with fire in their bellies and passion in their eyes.

“Jesus, I’m old,” I thought, and immediately

shotgunn’d a beer.

Among the hoard of underclassmen there was talk of

sledding and snowballs, skiing and snowboarding, and even

of streaking. It seemed that all the activities of Winter Carnival

merged into a beer-soaked night of genuine hell raising. By

two in the morning, those who were not a part of the scene

were asleep on couches and

oors, pinned against wallswith single-serving partners,

or otherwise indisposed.

The masses were not

done with Carnival come Saturday, and neither was I. The

fun resumed around three in the afternoon. Chi Gamma

Epsilon welcomed me in for a drink. I was accompa-

nied by my fellow oarsmen, fresh from crew practice.

At Chi Gam I was instructed in some of the ner points

of Dartmouth etiquette: how to properly serve in pong, for

instance, and how girls will judge me for playing video games.

I was foolish enough to think that I could best my compatriots

in a few contests of quick six, and in fact I believe I did bet-

ter than expected. That is, until I found myself on the oor

at Streeter—or was it Gile—staring up at three concerned

young women, asking if I was all right. They were angels

with uorescent halos. Or perhaps

my beer goggles were getting glitchy.

My night proceeded to a meet-

ing the Canoe Club with my usual

crowd. I ordered a Jack Daniel’s and

promptly fell asleep. I recovered from

this gaff, as I often do, and returned

to the dormitories to conclude my

Winter Carnival. I do not regret nearly

emptying the Goldstein Hall vending machine, nor do I regret

drawing a moustache on a friend’s face after walking him home.

Thus my first Winter Carnival ended, success-

ful except perhaps for the atrocious snow sculpture,

which I gather is par for the course. n

Mr. Kane is a freshman at the College and contributor

to The Dartmouth Review.

Mr. Peters is a freshman at the College and a contributor

to The Dartmouth Review.

Short Stories Explore Wartime

A Veteran’s First Carnival

The collection lacks a consistent,

underlying ideology or political

message; each story simply expresses

a different, complex perspective that

unites seamlessly into a whole.

Fire and Forget: Short Stories

from the Long War

Edited by Matt Gallagher

and Roy Scranton

Da Capo Press, 2013

Book Review

If I’m not being asked about the

Mandarin Chinese on my forearms,

I’m usually asked my thoughts on the

Dartmouth social scene. Until Winter

Carnival, I didn’t have a good answer.Now, at least I have a good story.

What a sobering experience the

polar bear plunge was; literally,

I was still drunk from the night before.

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13



By Cellar Door

In order to attain a national ranking, squash teams are

selected to compete in eight team cups. The top eight teams in

the compete in the Howey Cup,

the second eight in the Kurtz cup.

The Dartmouth Women’s squash

team finished their season ranked

9th nationally this year, the

Men’s team finished ranked 11th.A squash match is comprised

of 9 individual matches and

the winner is determined by

which team wins 5 of the 9.

The women won the Kurtz Cup

in three matches with scores

of 9-0, 9-0, 8-1, meaning they

won 26 of the 27 individual

matches they played. The

men placed third in the Kurtz

Cup and earned their own national distinction.

Both teams have been selected to play in the Howey Cup

(top eight) for the last six years. The men came in 7th last

year and the women 8th. Members of the women’s and men’s

teams both expressed positive feedback about their seasons.

However, the end of the regular season (just be-fore the draw for the national cups was re-

leased) came full of controversy for both teams.

The final matches of the regular season were against Brown.

At the time, both Dartmouth squads were ranked 8th in the

country and Brown 17th. If Dartmouth won the matches

as was expected (in November, Dartmouth beat brown

8-1), both Dartmouth teams would have been selected to

play in the Howey Cup and thus given a chance to win a

national title. The matches were to take place on a Sunday.

However, instead of the expected wins, Dartmouth was

forced to forfeit both matches after a decision was made

to bench the majority of both teams. Head Coach Hansi

Wiens explained tersely, “multiple team rules were broken.”

Sources close to the teams shed more light on the trans-

gressions, explaining that the team has a rule that prohibits

drinking within 48 hours of a match.

The match against Brown was on

a Sunday and the team members

drank on that Friday. The num-

ber of women’s team members

who drank remains unspecified.All but three members (Captains

Robbie Maycock ‘13 and Chris

Hanson ‘13 as well as Chris Jung

‘14) of the men’s team drank.

Perhaps the most interesting part

of the controversy is how the coach

and athletic directors discovered the

violations. Sources close to the

teams con-

firmed that

the captains of the women’s team blitzed

Coach Hansi the names of the women

who drank. It remains unclear how the

men’s team violation was uncovered, but

several theories are circulating. Some sus-

pect that the women’s captains divulgedthe men’s team violation in their initial

blitz. Alternatively, Coach Hansi may

have confronted the men’s team himself.

The ultimate decision to bench the

team was made by Athletic Director

Sheehy, Coach Hansi, and Associate

Athletic Director Richard Whitmore.

Harry Sheehy confirmed that the

players broke the team’s drinking rule,

quipping that while no league rules were

explicitly broken, the NCAA “in most

cases doesn’t drill down to that level.”

Mr. Sheehy also discussed the decision

to bench the players, saying, “It wasn’t

a department rule that was violated. It was their own rule.

We thought about it a little and we wanted to make sure the

message gets out. There are things that you do that impact

the whole team.” He went on to discuss the importance of

integrity to the athletics program, saying “We’re always

going to try to do the right thing at Dartmouth. We’re going

to make sure that what we makes sense and we’re not go-

ing to worry about Ws and Ls over doing the right thing.”

The Ivy League is rarely esteemed in the world

of college sports. Athletic Director Sheehy’s puritani-cal attitude perpetuates this reality. Would Alabama or

LSU bench players for a transgression that otherwise

would have had no impact on their season? For a closer

comparison, would Stanford ever make a similar deci-

sion? Considering that squash is one of the very few

sports in which the Ivy League excels, the Dartmouth

Athletic Department does a disservice to the school

by handicapping a particularly successful program. n

By Alfred J. Pennypicker

With a tougher schedule and the loss of key graduating

seniors, the Dartmouth Men’s Tennis team hardly knew what to

expect coming into their 2012-2013 season. And yet the trepi-

dation has hardly been warranted. Though the season has not

been solely lled with victories, the team has battled through

the tough parts of a threatening non-conference schedule and is

rounding into form just as the Ivy season is set to get underway.

The fall was lled mostly with individual competitions

and tune-ups. The team performed well as the hosts of the

Dartmouth Shootout in October, compiling an 18-2 singles

record and 8-2 doubles record. Results were more mixed at the

Gopher Invitational, hosted by the University of Minnesota, and

the Harvard Halloween Classic. Yet the team kept its focus, us-

ing these events as chances to bolster their games before the start

of the non-conference season that occurs during winter term.

The team faced a substantial challenge in its rst proper

match of the season on Friday January 25th, lining up against

the Tigers of Clemson University. Clemson is a traditional

tennis powerhouse, the fact that the team would travel to the

north woods for competition says a lot about Dartmouth’s

improvement in reputation and quality over the last few years.

Though the Dartmouth men fell 4-2 in a hard-fought match,

the team did not allow itself to become disheartened. How

could they with another stern test facing them the next day?

The team refocused

to face the then-unde-

feated Purdue Boiler-

makers, another team

known as a national

contender. Though the

men fell 4-3, the fact

that the match was

so close boded well for the team’s future prospects.

Speaking to team captain Mike Jacobs ’13 after the match,

I was struck by the positive tone and excitement in his voice. Ja-

cobs stressed the dramatic increase in quality of opponents this

year, noting how most of the teams on the Dartmouth schedule

are nationally ranked. He also stressed the fact that these teams

were traditionally unwilling to travel all the way to Hanover

and that present willingness indicates growing esteem for

the Dartmouth

p r o g r a m .

Though the

early losses

were disap-

pointing, Ja-

cobs remained

positive about

the t e a m’s

prospects go-

ing forward.

“It’s pos-

sible we got

off to a slow

start because

we weren’t

used to the

tough compe-

tition right off

the bat. It’s

great for the future of the

program though. We’re getting our act together now

and are excited to battle for the rest of the season,” he

said—maintaining that

the tougher schedule will

only serve to benet the

program both now and

in subsequent seasons.

Jacobs’ words have

proved prescient, as the

team has strung together

an impressive set of wins following the losses of their rst

weekend. On February 1st the team bested the Monarchs

of Old Dominion University 4-3, with strong performances

by Erik Nordahl ’16 and Brandon De Bot ’14 at fourth

and sixth singles, respectively. Feeding off the animated

crowd at Boss Tennis Center, Nordahl rose to the occasion

by overcoming a rst set bagel with a three-set victory.Though the team took a step back with a 1-6 loss at

Indiana, the rest of this term’s results have been strikingly

positive. The afternoon of February 8th saw an 8-1 victory over

the Bearcats of Binghamton University. The team used this

triumph to propel

themselves to a

stunning perfor-

mance against

Boston College,

b l a nk i ng t he

Eagles 7-0. The

doubles match

was tight, but a

late break by Ja-

cobs and Alex De

Chattelus ’13 led

to a win and elec-

tried the crowd.

The momentum

owed as all the

singles players

won in straight

sets, save for

Justin Chan ’16,

who took his match in three.

The team struggled at ECAC Championships the

weekend of February 15th but did not let this deter them

and they go into spring break riding a three-match win-

ning streak. They notched a come-from-behind 4-3 victory

against a wily St. John’s team with De Bot clinching the

match with a third set win. After the match Jacobs had

nothing but praise for De Bot, calling him “our rock.”

Just last weekend the team travelled to the Mid-

west to face Marquette and the University of Iowa

winning both matches 5-2. In addition to the winning

tennis the team enjoyed some downtime in the heart -

land, playing laser tag and generally hamming it up.

As the team enters the meat of its season there is

nothing but pride among the players. They have per-

formed admirably in the face of a demanding schedule

and are nding their form just as the Ivy season gets

underway. As the snow melts this spring in Hanover they will certainly be among the teams to watch. n

Mr. Door is a sophomore at the College and a fervent

supporter of Dartmouth Athletics.

Ms. Pennypicker is a senior at the College and admirer

of The Dartmouth Review.

Men’s & Women’s Squash Benched

Men’s Tennis Rises to Tough Schedule

— Athletic Director Harry Sheehy —

“It’s possible we got off to a slow start because we

weren’t used to the tough competition right off the

bat. It’s great for the future of the program though.

We’re getting our act together now and are excited

to battle for the rest of the season,” Jacobs said.

— Dartmouth Men’s Tennis Captain Mike Jacobs ‘13 —

— Head Coach Hansi Wiens with men’s captain Robbie Maycock ‘13 —

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13


March 4, 2013 The Dartmouth Review F. Scott Fitzgerald Visits Hanover:

Mr. Desai is a member of the class of 2008 and Editor

Emeritus of The Dartmouth Review.

By Nicholas Desai

Editor’s Note: The following is a Review favorite

from the archi ves . Former Edit or-in-Chief Nichola s

Desa i drew this account of Fitzgerald’s visi t to Ha-

nover from Dartmouth Library’s Budd Schulburg les.

The story of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s 1939 trip to Dartmouth

for Winter Carnival is legendary, even if the best known

version has it simply that the novelist got very drunk in

Hanover. Even this condensed form has appeal: the man

of letters who does not uphold the supposed dignity of

his profession is both comic and tragic. Yet an investiga-

tion of the Budd Schulberg papers reveals a tale that,

eshed out, gains still more gravity and comic appeal.

It’s a yarn that Schulberg ‘36 related many times in

publications, at conferences, and in

ctional form in his 1951 novel The

Disenchanted . Like any drinking

story, it seems to alter with each tell-

ing to provide maximum entertain-

ment, usually through emphasis but

occasionally in presentation of facts.

(Did Schulberg really take Fitzgerald

to Psi U or simply feint in that direc-tion?) But Schulberg, the acclaimed

novelist of What Makes Sammy Run?

and Academy Award-winning screen-

writer of “On the Waterfront,” tells it

well each time. What follows is the

‘39 bender according to Schulberg,

which is drawn from several accounts

and rendered using a combination of

quotation and paraphse. His is the

controlling view, since he stuck by

Fitzgerald more closely than anyone

else during their brief excursion.

Schulberg was something of a

Hollywood prince, the son of a movie

mogul who had known only Hol-

lywood, Deereld Academy, and Dartmouth by the time hehad reached his twenty-fourth year. He had graduated from

Dartmouth three years before and was working for David

O. Selznick, a family friend and the legendary producer

who made “Gone with the Wind.” This would have led to a

career in production, like his father’s, but Schulberg aspired

to write. After extricating himself from Selznick, he received

a call from the producer Walter Wanger ‘15 who proposed

making a picture about Dartmouth’s Winter Carnival.

“I always thought of Hollywood like a principality of

its own,” Schulberg reected years later, “ It was like a sort

of a Luxembourg, or something like that, or Liechtenstein.

And the people who ran it really had that attitude. They

weren’t only running a studio, they were running a whole

little world... They could cover up murder... You could liter-

ally have somebody killed, and it wouldn’t be in the papers.

“It was not something on my own I would sit down and be fascinated by, the Winter Carnival movie,” Schulberg

recalled, “But it was good money; it was 250 bucks a week,

a lot of money—there’s no denying it. I’d been married

young. Also it was about my own place, my own college.”

Schulberg later described the Carni-

val as “jumping off point in time for the

ski craze that was eventually to sweep

America from Maine to California. But

somehow in the 20’s, it had gotten all mixed

up with the election of a Carnival Queen.

And by the time I was an undergraduate, I

mean a Dartmouth man, the Carnival had

developed into a hyped-up beauty contest,

winter fashion show and fancy dress ball,

complete with an ‘Outdoor Evening’ ski-and-ice extravaganza

that would have made Busby Berkeley green with envy.“In 1929 the Carnival Queen was a edgling movie star,

Florence Rice, daughter of the illustrious Grantland... In 1937

the Dartmouth band led ve thousand to Occom Pond in a

torchlight parade to cheer the coronation of a gorgeous blonde

with full red lips. The Dartmouth ski team swooped down

from the hills with aming torches in tribute to their Queen

of the Snow. Champion skaters twirled on the ice in front of

her throne and sky rockets lit the winter night. It had begun to

look more like a snowbound Hollywood supercolossal starring

Sonja Henie and a chorus of Goldwyn Girls than the homespun

college event Fred Harris had fathered a quarter of a century

before. One could hardly blame a movie tycoon-alumnus

like Walter Wanger for wanting to bring it to the screen.

“Wanger was a very dapper man; he prided himself on

being dapper in a Hollywood setting among gauche Holly-

wood producers. Walter was Ivy League, and he played that

role of the Ivy League producer. He had the right threads

on for the Ivy League: he was Brooks Brothers. And he had

books—real books!—in the bookcase behind him. The only

thing that bothered me—well, a number of things bothered me

about Walter—but the only detail that bothered me was that

he had a large photo of Mussolini framed there on the wall,

inscribed ‘To Walter, with the best wishes of his friend, Benito.’

By the end of the year that disappeared into the bathroom.”

Wanger told Schulberg that the script he’d written solo

was “lousy,” (“I didn’t see War and Peace in Winter Carni-

val,” quipped Schulberg), and that he would need to bring

in another writer. Schulberg

said later that no matter how

famous or accomplished a

writer was in those days, he

could be hired for a few days

before being summarily red.

So he felt lucky merely to have

hung on to the job and asked

who his collaborator would be.“ I t ’ s F . S c o t t

Fitzgerald,” said Wanger.

“I looked at him; I hon-

estly thought he was pulling

my leg.” Schulberg had seen

Fitzgerald some years back

downtown at the Biltmore

Theatre as he came out of a play

with Dorothy Parker and look-

ing “ghostly white and frail

and pail.” But that was some

years back, and when Wanger

said, ‘F. Scott Fitzgerald,’ I

said, ‘Scott Fitzgerald—isn’t

he dead?’ And Wanger made

some crack like, ‘Well, I doubt that your script is that bad.’He perhaps said, ‘Maybe bored him to death,’ or something

like that. But Wanger said, ‘No, he’s in the next room, and

he’s reading your script now.’” Schulberg went to meet him.

“My God, he’s so old,” he thought then.

“His complexion,” he said later, “was manuscript

white and, though there was still a light brown

tint to his hair, the rst impression he made

on me was of a ghost—the ghost of the Great

Novelist Past who had sprung to early fame with

This Side of Paradise, capped his early promise

at age 29 with what many critics hailed as the

great American novel, The Great Gatsby, and then had taken

nine years to write and publish the book most of the same

critics condemned as ‘disappointing,’ Tender is the Night .”

Fitzgerald nished reading the forty-eight-odd pages

of the “Winter Carnival” script and said, “Well, it’s not verygood,” to which Schulberg replied, “Oh, I know, I know, I

know it’s not good.” They went to lunch at the Brown Derby.

Schulberg and Fitzgerald soon discovered that they

knew “everybody in common; it was a small town... We

talked about so many writers.

We talked about the dilemma

of the Eastern writer coming

West and writing movies for a

living, always with the dream of

that one more chance, one more

chance to go back and write that

novel, write that play that would

re-establish him—mostly him,

a few hers—once again.”

Sc hu lbe rg to ld h im how muc h he a d -

mired Gatsby, and how much it meant to him,along with the short stories and Tender is the Night .

“I’m really amazed that you know anything about

me,” said Fitzgerald, “I’ve had the feeling that no-

body in your generat ion would read me anymore. ”

“I have a lot of friends that do.” (“That was

only partly true,” he said later, “Most of my radical,

communist-oriented peers looked on him as a relic.”)

“Last year my royalties were $13,” said Fitzgerald.

They discussed politics, literature, and gossip. “Scott was

tuned into everything we talked about—everything except

“Winter Carnival.” Everything. We went through those things,

I think, all afternoon. We decided to meet the next day at the

studio at ten, and we did but we got talking about everything

but “Winter Carnival”... and we tried we really tried. But

“Winter Carnival” was the kind of movie that is very hard to

get your mind on, especially when you have the excitement

of so many other things that are really more interesting.”

It was, in other words, a pleasant time, though they were

not doing the work for which they were being paid. “After

about four or ve days, it reminded me of sitting around a

campus dormitory room in one of those bull sessions, talk-

ing about all the things we both shared and enjoyed.” An

additional danger loomed: though they drew salaries, they

had not signed contracts and could be red at any time.

After a week, Wanger called them into his ofce to

check on their progress. Having done hardly any work,

they nevertheless managed not to let on that they had been

ignoring the script. Wanger said that they’d better create a

central storyline soon, since the entire crew was traveling

to Hanover to shoot “backgrounds.” (“In those days, they

would shoot the backgrounds based on what the scenes were

and then in the studio have the actors behaving as if they

were at the ski-lift, on the porch of the Inn, and so forth.”)

As to whether they should accompany the crew, Fitzger-

ald was resistant. “Well, Walter, I hadn’t planned to go to

Dartmouth. I’ve seen enough college parties, I think, to write

a college movie without having to go to the Winter Carnival.”

His resistance was perhaps more understandable if you

understand that ying in those days required a goodly chunk of

time. “People today don’t realize what ying was. It was just one

step away from the Santa Fe Chief. You got on, and you stopped

for refueling several times, and it took about sixteen hours.”

To stay employed, Fitzgerald gave in. “While I felt

sorry for Scott, I have to admit that I was looking for-

ward to going back to Dartmouth with Scott Fitzgerald.”

Schulberg regarded his father, the head of Para-

mount, as one of the more literary producers in town, and

this trait made him proud that his son was working with

such a gure as Fitzgerald. Therefore, the elder Schul-

berg brought them two bottles of champagne for the trip.

“As we got on the plane, we were still talking,” Schulberg

recalled, “We were talking about Edmund Wilson, we were

talking about communism, we were talking about the people

we knew in common, like Upton Sinclair and Lincoln Steffens.

All of this was going on and on. And it would have been greatfun if we didn’t have this enormous monkey—more like a

gorilla—of “Winter Carnival” on our backs. We got to sipping

champagne through the next hour or so; it was very congenial. It

was really fun, I thought, and then we cracked the second bottle

of champagne. We

went on merrily

talking and drink-

ing. Every once in

a while we would

say, ‘You know, by

the time we get to

Manhattan we’d better have some kind of a line on this Winter

Carnival.’ And we tried all kinds of things; we really did try.”

In Manhattan, they stayed at the Warwick Hotel,

where they worked for a bit on the story, to no real end.

“Scott,” he said, “You’ve written a hundred short stories,and I’ve written a few: I mean between the two of us we

should be able to knock out a damn outline for this story.”

“Yes, we wi l l , we wi l l . Don’t wor-

ry, pal. We will, we will,” said Fitzgerald.

A few college friends called Schulberg, and it

turned out they were staying only a few blocks away.

“So I told Scott that I would go and see them; I’d be

back in one hour. That was one of my mistakes.” When he

returned to the room, he found an unpunctuated note that

read, from Schulberg’s memory, “Pal you shouldn’t have

left me pal because I got lonely pal and I went down to

the bar pal and I came up and looked for you pal and now

Im back down at the bar and I’ll be waiting for you pal.”

Schulberg found Fitzgerald in a hotel bar a few blocks

away and saw that he was in bad shape, not having eaten

anything. Nevertheless, they continued to drink and work on the script back in their room in preparation for the

nine a.m. meeting with Wanger at the Waldorf Astoria

in the morning. Despite the drink, the lack of sleep, and

the fact that they had no story, they successfully evaded

Wanger’s detection and were encouraged to keep working.

As they got up, Wanger asked in passing, “Oh,

by the way, did you meet anybody on the plane?”

Schulberg mentioned that they had seen Sheilah Gra-

ham, a movie columnist. “And Walter’s face darkened, and

he looked at Scott and said, ‘Scott, you son of a bitch.’”

It turned out that Fitzgerald had secretly arranged to have

his girlfriend accompany him on the trip, though it might be

more correct to say that she was the one who insisted on it.

Fitzgerald, in addition to his alcoholism, simply had very poor

— Budd Schulberg ‘36 —

“I’m really amazed that you know

anything about me,” said Fitzgerald,

“I’ve had the feeling that nobody in your

generation would read me anymore.”

Schulberg was something of a

Hollywood prince, the son of a

movie mogul who had known only

Hollywood, Deerfield Academy,

and Dartmouth by the time he had

reached his twenty-fourth year.

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13


The Dartmouth Review March 4, 2013 The Saga of the “Winter Carnival” Filmhealth. But, in Schulberg’s presence, Fitzgerald and Graham

pretended to have met by chance on the plane. Schulberg

apologized to Fitzgerald for mentioning it in the Waldorf.

“Well, Budd, it’s my fault. I should have told you.”

Despite this delay, they managed to make the Carnival Spe-

cial, the train con-

veying crowds

of females to

Dartmouth for

the weekend.

“They were real-

ly like a thousand

Scott Fitzgerald

heroines, they

were...The en-

tire train given

over to Win-

ter Carnival.”

I n 1 9 7 4 ,

Schulberg revis-

ited Dartmouth

and wrote an open

letter to Fitzger-

ald, reminiscing

about their little bender. The Car-

nival Special was

apparently the

most noticeable

absence from the

1970s version.

“Can you hear me

right, Scott? No

more Carnival

Special! No more train loads of breathless dates, doll-faced

blondes and saucy brunettes, the prettiest and ashiest from

Vassar, Wellesley, and Smith. Plus the hometown knock-

outs in form-tting ski suits, dressed to their sparkling

white teeth for what we used to call ‘The Mardi Gras of

the North.’ Of course there were some plain faces among

them, homespun true loves, as bets any female invasion.”Though Schulberg had told himself he would keep

an eye on Fitzgerald’s drinking, the man had nevertheless

managed to procure a pint of gin, which he kept in his

overcoat pocket. “One thing that [writers are] able to do,

they are like magicians in their ability to hide and then sud-

denly produce bottles.” Wanger took Schulberg aside and

asked him if Fitzgerald had been drinking, to which he an-

swered no, in a sort of writers’ solidarity against producers.

“Another thing I should mention in passing is

that Scott may have looked as if he was falling down

drunk but his mind never stopped,” Schulberg recalled.

The train trip didn’t improve the script either as they

continued to talk about anything but the lm. There was

literally no story. Fitzgerald offered a story about a “waitress

with a baby and the baby on an ice oe and the ski captain

saves the baby... it was awful, it was awful. And we were

getting a little like, ‘Jesus, Scott. That’s terrible!’ and ‘Well,if you think that’s bad, then you—’” They became a bit edgy.

Schulberg’s idea, he later claimed, was mostly to

do with a “rebel college editor” (Schulberg had edited

The Daily Dartmouth as an undergraduate), and Fitzger-

ald centered on the story of “an old love rekindled for

a moment in the Carnival res and then forever lost.”

“What Dartmouth Winter Carnival represented—and

remember how we tried to analyze this, Scott, in our futile

pursuit of a suitable Winter Carnival theme—was a tribal

fertility rite,” Schulberg wrote in his 1974 letter, “That was

the essence of Carnival, we decided, taking its character from

the self-enforced isolation of thousands of young males living

together on by far the most isolated campus in the Ivy League.”

When they arrived, the extremely enthusiastic second unit

director, Otto Lovering, better known as Lovey, met them on

the platform, bright and eager. “Just tell use where to go, boys,”

he said to them, “We’re ready, we got the crew... we’re ready

to go!” They stalled and asked to go to the Hanover Inn, where

they supposed they might think up a story within an hour or so.

When they got to the Hanover Inn, the entire lm crew was

already there, “twenty people—more, two

dozen—everybody had a room at the Inn.”

“Sir, we don’t seem to have a reservation

for you,” said the desk clerk to Fitzgerald,

and as a result Schulberg and Fitzgerald

ended up in the attic of the Inn. “It was

not really a room meant for people to live

in,” remembered Schulberg, “It was sort

of an auxiliary room where things were

stored.” The room contained a single

two-level wire bed, a table, and no chair.

“Gee, I’m sorry, Scott, but it’s hard

to believe they’ve forgotten to get

a room for us,” said Schulberg.

“Well,” Fitzgerald quipped, “I guess that

really does say something about where the

lm writer stands in the Hollywood soci-

ety.” (“And he seemed to see it completely

in symbols,” Schulberg remembered later.)

They stayed in their attic room the entire

day, drinking and trying to write. “Scott

stretched out on his back in the lower

[bunk], and I in the upper, according to

our rank, and we tried to ad-lib a story…

But the prospect of still another college

musical was hardly inspiring, and soon

we were comparing the Princeton of his

generation with the Dartmouth of mine.”

“Well, maybe this is good,” thought Schulberg, “The

booze will sort of run out. We’re up in the attic; there’s no

phone; there’s nothing. And maybe if Scott takes a nap,

and we take a deep breath, we’ll just start all over again.”

Periodically, Lovey popped his eager-beaver head

into the room. “Where do we go? What’s the first

set-up?” Schulberg and Fitzgerald simply pulled loca-tions out of thin air with no relation to any extant plot.

They told him on a whim to shoot at the Outing Club:

“Well, we have a scene of the two of them as they come down

the steps and they look at the frozen pond, and we’ll play

that scene there.” They didn’t, in fact, have a scene. Lovey

enthusiastically dispatched these fool’s errands: ‘”Great,

you’ve done it awfully well.”

And just when it seemed

that they’d drunk all the alcohol,

the “ruddy-faced, ex-athlete”

Professor Red Merrill came

into their attic chamber, bearing

a bottle of whiskey. Schulberg

had been introduced to Fitzger-

ald’s work in Merrill’s class

“Sociology and the American Novel,” and Merrill was a rare

Fitzgerald fan. The three of them

proceeded to kill this bottle in a

few hours while discussing lit-

erature. After Merrill left, Lovey

ducked in and asked for an-

other set-up, which he received.

Fitzgerald was then sup-

posed to atte nd a reception

with the dean (there was at that

time only one dean, accord-

ing to Schulberg) and several

other literature-minded faculty

members. The idea was that

Wanger would present him and

Fitzgerald would describe the plot of the lm they were shoot-

ing. “It was a disaster since it

was pretty obvious that not only

was Scott drunk, but when I

tried to ll in for him, anyone

could see that we had no story.”

“One Professor Macdonald

(I remember him well; he was

a very dapper man, very well-

dressed, very feisty) made me

feel bad because I thought he was

enjoying Scott’s appearance and

Scott’s defeat. He said, ‘He’s re-

ally a total wreck, isn’t he? He’s

a total wreck.’ But he didn’t say it in a nice way to me. At the

same time Scott looked as if he was absolutely non compus,

but his mind was going fast and well, and he made observa-

tions about these people that were much sharper, I think, than

anything that Professor MacDonald or anybody else could say.”

Then Schulberg realized why Wanger had insisted

so strongly on Fitzgerald’s coming to Dartmouth. He had

hoped that the college might confer Wanger an honor-

ary degree if he paraded around a writer. “He thought

that showing off Scott Fitzgerald, even a faded Scott

Fitzgerald, would help him along that road. And now

he’d been embarrassed and, in a way, humiliated.”

In The Daily Dartmouth’s February 11, 1939 issue, John

D. Hess wrote up an interview with Wanger and Fitzgerald:

“The public personality of Walter Wanger ‘15 is a

disturbing blend of abruptness and charm. At this particu-

lar interview, he sat quietly in a chair exuding power and

authority in easy breaths, seemingly indifferent to anything

I said, but quickly, suddenly, sharply catching a phrase,

questioning it, commenting upon it, grinding it into me,

smiling, and then apparently forgetting all about me again.

“In a chair directly across from Mr. Wanger was Mr.

F. Scott Fitzgerald, who looked and talked as if he had

long since become tired of being known as the spokes-

man of that unfortunate lost generation of the 1920’s.

Mr. Fitzgerald is working on the script of Mr. Wanger’s

picture, ‘Winter Carnival. ’” We now know, of course,

that Fitzgerald was not tired but three sheets to the wind.

Having more or less survived the faculty ordeal, the

pair proceeded back to the Inn, where Schulberg encour-

aged Fitzgerald to take an invigorating nap. He lay down

on the bottom bunk, and Schulberg, believing Fitzger-

ald asleep, snuck off to visit some fraternity chums.

Sitting at the fraternity bar not long after this escape,

Schulberg felt a tap on his shoulder. It was Fitzgerald.

“I don’t know how he got there or found me, but he did.

And he looked so totally out of place. He had on his fedora

and his overcoat. He was not in any way prepared either in

his clothing or his mind for this Winter Carnival weekend.”

Supporting him by the arm, Schulberg walked Fitzgerald

out of the house and down Wheelock street. He seemed sud-denly to regain his energy and suggested having a drink at Psi U.

“And when we got to the Inn... I tried to fool Scott.

I was trying to get him back in the room. I said, ‘O.K.,

Scott, here we are,’ and he realized what I was doing

and got very mad at me. We had sort of a tussle and we

fell down in the snow, kind of rolled in the snow.” After

— ”Winter Carnival” advertised in The Dartmouth Graphic, 1939 —

—An incription from Schulberg: “For my friends at

Dartmouth: This book inspired by my troubled visit with

F.S.F. just 45 years ago. Sincerely, Budd Schulberg”—

“What Dartmouth Winter Carnival repre-

sented—and remember how we tried to

analyze this, Scott, in our futile pursuit of a suitable Winter Carnival theme—was a

tribal fertility rite,” Schulberg wrote in his

1974 letter, “That was the essence of Car-

nival, we decided, taking its character from

the self-enforced isolation of thousands of

young males living together on by far the

most isolated campus in the Ivy League.”

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13



And the Bender of 1939this was resolved, they decided to visit a coffee shop.

“[At the coffee shop] it was humorous in a way because

there were all those kids enjoying Winter Carnival, and every-

body was so up, and we were so bedraggled, so down, worried,

in despair.” Suddenly, Fitzgerald went into his element, and

told “this marvelous detailed, romantic story of a girl in an

open touring car (he described how she was dressed). Over

the top of the hill is this skier coming down, and she stops the

car and looks at him. Scott described it immaculately well.”

Having nished the coffee, they proceeded back to

the Hanover Inn, on whose steps loomed—“as

in a bad movie—or maybe in the movie we were

trying to write” —none other than Walter Wanger,

dressed in a white tie and top hat “like Fred

Astaire... He was not a tall man, but standing a

step or two above us and with a top hat, he really

looked like a Hollywood god staring down at us.”

“I don’t know what the next train out of here is,”

Wanger intoned, “but you two are going to be on it.”

“They put us on the train about one o’clock

in the morning with no luggage,” Schulberg

remembers,” They just threw us on the train.”

At dawn they pulled into New York, and Schul-

berg with the porter had to rouse Fitzgerald and

drag him into a cab. They returned to the Warwick

they had just left, and apparently experiencing a

motif, were greeted with the news that there was

no room. Perhaps, Schulberg thought later, their

appearance and lack of luggage dissuaded the

staff. “Somehow the days had run together and

we hadn’t changed. We both looked like what you

look like when you haven’t done some of the things

that one needs to do to keep yourself together.”

“Have you got a reservation?” the desk staff asked.

“Well, we just left,” they responded, although,

Schulberg recalled, “It seemed like a year, an eternity... As I

look back we had no luggage, and the two of us looked like

God knows what. I don’t think we’d changed our clothes from

the time we’d left Hollywood. I’m sure we’d hardly gone to

bed, maybe an hour or so, half-dressed, in the Warwick.”

Several unreceptive hotels later, Fitzgerald said,“Budd, take me to the Doctors’ Hospital. They’ll take

me in there at the Doctors’ Hospital.” This worked, and

a week later Sheila Graham took Fitzgerald back west.

He was of course red. Schulberg was red and re-hired.

“After Winter Carnival,” he was in major trouble,”

remembers Schulberg, “You know what a small town it

is. Everybody knows everybody else’s business, and Scott

was extremely damaged.” Yet, touchingly for Schulberg,

Fitzgerald continued to send him notes about the lm.

“He had great dreams about Hollywood,” Schulberg

said, “It was not just the money. Most of the writers I knew—

Faulkner and the others—just wanted to get the money and

get out. Scott was different. He believed in the movies…. He

went to lms all the time and he kept a card le of the plots.

He’d go back and write out the plot of every lm he saw.”

Still, the picture itself couldn’t have worked, he

said, “For by the end of the 30’s, when we haunted

the Carnival, it had become a show in itself. And

back-stage stories are notoriously resistant to quality.”

Schulberg and Fitzgerald remained good friends after-

wards, continuing to discuss what they’d always wished to

discuss without the burden of Wanger or his lm. Schulberg

remained struck by Fitzgerald’s irrepressible, almost boyishenthusiasm for ideas. “One evening, in West Los Angeles,”

Schulberg wrote, “I was dashing off, late for a dinner party,

when Scott burst in. ‘I’ve just been rereading Spengler’s

Decline of the West .’ That was for openers from the playboy

of the western world. How did he maintain this incredible

sophomoric enthusiasm that all the agonies could not down? I

told him I just didn’t have time to go into Spengler now. I was

notoriously late and had to run. Scott accepted this with his

usual Minneapolis-cum-Princeton-cum-Southern good man-

ners. ‘All right. But we have to talk about it. In the light of what

Hitler is doing in Europe. Spengler saw it coming. I could feel

it. But did nothing about it. Typical—of the decline of the west.’

“Maybe it was to make up for the years frittered

away at Princeton, and in the playgrounds of the rich,

but, drunk or sober (and except for the Dartmouth

trip and one other occasion, I only saw him sober),he never stopped learning, never stopped inquiring.”

Schulberg remembers the day he saw Fitzgerald for the

last time. “I remember very well it was on the rst day of

December in 1940, and I was going East; I’d been working

on my rst novel), I went to say goodbye to Scott, and he was

in bed. He lived in a sort of simple, fairly plain apartment

right in pretty much the heart of old Hollywood off of Sunset

Boulevard right around the corner from Schwab’s Drugstore,

which was the hangout for everyone in the neighborhood.

Scott had this desk built for him to t around him in the bed,

as he was pretty frail and feeling weak and at the same time

found he could write in bed for two-three hours every day.”

He brought a copy of Tender is the Night , which he had

Fitzgerald inscribe to his daughter Vicky. The inscrip-

tion read, “Whose illustrious father pulled me out of

snowdrifts and away from avalanches.” (Dartmouth

has this inscribed copy in its special collections.)

Schulberg asked how his novel, which turned out to

beThe Last Tycoon, was progressing. Though Schul-

berg didn’t know the novel’s exact subject matter,

he guessed it was Hollywood since Fitzgerald had

barraged him with questions about the lm industry,

and what it had been like growing up around it.

Later, Schulberg was mildly disappointed to read in

the rst pages of The Last Tycoon an insight that he

had given Fitzgerald during one off these interviews.

It was the idea that Hollywood was an industry town

like any other, except that it made movies instead

of tires or steel. Yet, it did not sting too badly: “I’ve

known writers (I was raised with them), and I’ve

known them from one end of my life to the other. And

he was one of the most gentle, kindest, most sympa-

thetic and generous writers I’ve ever met. At the same

time, of course, he couldn’t stop lifting something

you said because that’s the profession he was in.”

In late December 1940, Schulberg had a drink with

a Dartmouth professor, Herb West, at the Hanover

Inn. West “suddenly but terribly casually looked up from

his glass and said, ‘Isn’t it too bad about Scott Fitzgerald?’”

This was the rst that Schulberg had heard of Fitzgerald’s

death of a heart attack in Sheila Graham’s apartment.

The obituaries portrayed Fitzgerald as a mere mascot

of the Jazz Age, a man unt for the age of political com -mitment. Disgusted, Schulberg, John O’Hara, and Edmund

Wilson, inter alia, approached The New Republicin 1941

with the idea of a Fitzgerald memorial issue, which ran.

Wanger went on to lead the Association of Alumni and

the Motion Picture Academy, while continuing to produce

movies. Schulberg testied voluntarily before the House

Un-American Activities Committee, explaining that he

broke wi th communism when they tried to interfere wi th

his literary work. He won the Academy Award for the

screenplay for “On the Waterfront” several years later. In

1951, Wanger shot his actress wife’s agent in the groin with

a .38 pistol. “I shot him because he broke up my home,”

he told the police. The incident was well-covered in the

papers. He served four months in prison. Schulberg’s The

Disenchanted , published in 1950, was widely seen as a

roman-à-clef about Fitzgerald and became a bestseller. Itrenewed interest in Fitzgerald and his novels, which were

reprinted. Today, his critical reputation is unassailable. n

— A note from Fitzgerald to Schulberg: “Bud: Am upstairs doing a sort of

creative brood, Scott. Changed —gone out with Walter.”—

Perhaps, Schulberg thought later, their

appearance and lack of luggage dis-

suaded the staff. “Somehow the days had

run together and we hadn’t changed. We

both looked like what you look like when

you haven’t done some of the things thatone needs to do to keep yourself together.”

Write for


Blitz [email protected] for more information.

7/29/2019 TDR 3.1.13



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Barrett’s Mixology By Adam I. W. Schwartzman

It was only the rst Monday of the rst week of the new year, but already

the one-eyed gypsy’s prophecy was proving more accurate than I could have

possibly imagined. I stood there, at high noon in the center of town, and I knew

there was no drink within 100 miles that could quench my thirst. I was in a dry

country, and brother did I know it.

My tongue was sandpaper, my saliva was dust, and my teeth the brittle mesas

of the desert.

My gun belt dragged on my hip, the holsters as empty as my stomach.

Sonny Jim sat on a bench outside of the root beer saloon. Of course at that

point I didn’t know him or his name—I didn’t know anyone in this town—but I

saw him sitting there, holding a stick with a sharp point. Funny, I didn’t see any

trees around here.

I walked over to the bench, my only reason being that I had time to kill, and

even without my guns I could still handle that old cuckoo bird and his sharp

stick if we came to ghting words.“Hello, son.” He eyed me as I sat down next to him. His demeanor was not

unfriendly.

“You’re just in time,” he said. “Sherriff’s been shot dead, and Big Bad

Iron Sam is bound to come back any second for the Aztec gold. We prayed for a

stranger, such as you. What’s your name, anyway, stranger?”

It was just as the gypsy had predicted.

“Pardon my manners,” he said once he realized I wasn’t in a talking mood.

“I’m Sonny Jim, and you look like you could use something stronger than we’re

supposed to care for in these sober counties. If you’re looking to get sorted, I’ll

show to the rotgut we can muster.”

I turned to smile at him, but the effort pained my jaw. I motioned with my

arm and followed Sonny Jim in through the swinging doors of the root beer

saloon.

gordon haff’s

the last word.

Compiled by Adam I. W. Schwartzman

Whatever ya got.

A Friend in Need

In the depth of winter I nally learned that there was

in me an invincible summer.

—Albert Camus

Tradition means giving votes to the most obscure of

all classes, our ancestors. It is the democracy of the

dead. Tradition refuses to submit to that arrogant

oligarchy who merely happen to be walking around.

—Gilbert K. Chesterton

It was one of those March days when the sun shines

hot and the wind blows cold: when it is summer in

the light, and winter in the shade.

-Charles Dickens

Without tradition, art is a ock of sheep without a

shepherd. Without innovation, it is a corpse.

—Winston Churchill

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make

lemonade... And try to nd somebody whose life has

given them vodka, and have a party.

—Ron White

It takes an endless amount of history to make even

a little tradition.

—Henry James

It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to en-

tertain a thought without accepting it.

—Aristotle

Tradition is a guide and not a jailer.

—W. Somerset Maugham

We stand our best chance of leaving a legacy to those

who want to learn, our children, by standing rm. In

matters of style, hey, swing with the stream. But in

matters of principle, you need to stand like a rock.

—Kevin Costner

An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.

—Benjamin Franklin

Education is all a matter of building bridges.

—Ralph Ellison

Be a yardstick of quality. Some people aren’t used to

an environment where excellence is expected.

—Steve Jobs

You miss one hundred percent of the shots you never

take.

—Wayne Gretsky

Education... has produced a vast population able to

read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading.

—G. M. Trevelyan

I have more memories than if I were a thousand years

old.

—Charles Baudelaire

The problem with winter sports is that, follow me closely

here, they generally take place in winter.

—Dave Barry

Tradition does not mean that the living are dead, it

means that the dead are living.

—Harold MacMillan

Education’s purpose is to replace an empty mind

with an open one.

—Marlcolm Forbes

Winter is not a season, it’s an occupation.

—Upton Sinclair

If you’d rather live surrounded by pristine objects

than by the traces of happy memories, stay focused

on tangible things. Otherwise, stop xating on stuff

you can touch and start caring about stuff that touches you.

—Martha Beck

Education is the transmission of civilization.

—Will Durant

An American monkey, after getting drunk on brandy,

would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser

than most men.

—Charles Darwin

In America nothing dies easier than tradition.

—Russell Baker

I think everyone should go to college and get a de-

gree and then spend six months as a bartender and

six months as a cabdriver. Then they would really

be educated.

—Al McGuire

I like narrative storytelling as being part of a tradi-

tion, a folk tradition.

—Bruce Springsteen

Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a

lost tradition.

—Jacques Barzun

Responsibility educates.

—Wendell Phillips

tdr 3.1.13

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