8/11/2019 The Game, Two 2014

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38 TWO . .

Lets see , hetook 10 minutesto text me back.Ill wait 15

minutes to reply,so I dont seemtoo into him.Oh! Tere she is! Im going to go talk to her wait I initiated our last three conversa-tions. Ill wait or her to come talk to me.

Toughts like those are the meat o whathas come to be known in society as thegame, and playing the game has become thedating norm. Nearly everyone participateseven though nearly everyone seems to hate it.

A lot o people believe that play-ing the game is manipulative, dishonest,

stress ul or even just stupid. It isnt ofenthat people talk about how benecialor un it is even i they do thrive onit because people usually dont like tosel -identi y with negative connotations.

So why does it seem like everyone plays the game, despite their moral (or atleast admitted moral) exception to it?

Its because everyone is doing it, andsometimes re can only be ought with re.

Sure, its better to ght re with water. Water extinguishes res. But the ames o thedating game have risen pretty high, and thereisnt enough water in the mains o BYU to put it out. It would take an eleventh com-mandment to squash it here, so embracingthe ames seems to be the only way to go.

Tere are really only a ew ways to deal with playing the game. Lets break this down:Fighting Fire with FireYou can justi y playing the game by only par-ticipating once in a while or maybe just when youre getting to know someone, so you dontcome on too strong. Tose that are unsure

o what they want ofen take thisapproach. Tis is playing the game without being a player. And afer theD R, it should be GAME OVER.

Playing the game is necessaryto approach someone and show

interest while not becoming too vulnerable. However afer you entera relationship, both parties need tobe vulnerable and open to orm asignicant relationship, said EvanLong, a junior studying biophysics.Fireworks inthe Woods When people light reworks inthe woods that end up burningdown the orest, they would be in pretty deep trouble i they came

orward and admitted to it.Likewise, some o the games

heaviest hitters are those that saytheyre assertive and all aboutclear and honest communication.Tey deny playing the game, butsecretly theyre playing it, hittinghome runs, scoring touchdownsand loving it. Tey may even tellthemselves its everyone else that plays the game, but not them. The Fire ExtinguisherLets ace it; there are some people withenough good looks, charm or backboneto simply re use to play the game, andstill get away with it. Tey extinguish the

res o the game by not playing it at all.For everyone else, being up ront with

someone else and telling them how you eel isrisky. It puts you in a position o vulnerability,and may not turn out they way you want it to.But it also has the potential to add kindlingto the sparks o a relationship so that it canreally take off. People usually dont play thiscard initially though. Teyll usually andunderstandablywait or some signs rst.

I eel that afer a serious encounter, likea date, there needs to be an affi rmation or adenial, said Kaiser Larsen, a junior studying public relations. It becomes counterproduc-tive when the girl or guy wont be straight upand indicate i they should just be riends.

AnalysisTe game isnt going away any time soon. I you morally object to it, like most peopledo, youll have to cope with it somehow.

I regard the game un ortunatelyan inevitable part o li e, said Zach-ary Baldau , a sophomore studying so-cial science teaching. I you dont likeit, you have to at least tolerate it.

Its because everyone isdoing it, and sometimes recan only be fought with re.

THE GAME