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    Lazar Lagi n. The Ol d Geni e Hot t abych

    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -A St ory of Make- Bel i eveRussian original title: ( "

    ")

    FOREI GN LANGUAGES PUBLI SHI NG HOUSE MOSCOWTransl ated f r omt he Russi an by Fai nna Sol askoOCR: ht t p: / / home. f r eeuk. com/ r ussi ca2

    _______________________________________________

    The amusi ng and f asci nat i ng chi l dr en' s book i s of t en cal l ed t he Russi an"Thousand and One Ni ght s" .

    Who i s t he Ol d Geni e Hot t abych?Thi s i s what t he aut hor has t o say of hi m: " I n one of Scheher ezade' s

    t al es I r ed of t he Fi sher man who f ound a copper vessel i n hi s net . I n t hevessel was a mi ght y Geni e - a magi ci an who had been i mpr i soned i n the bot t l ef or near l y t wo t housand year s. The Geni e had swor n t o make the one who f r eedhi m r i ch, power f ul and happy.

    " But what i f such a Geni e suddenl y came t o l i f e i n t he Sovi et Uni on,i n Moscow? I t r i ed t o i magi ne what woul d have happened i f a ver y ordi naryRussi an boy had f r eed hi m f r omt he vessel .

    "And i magi ne, I suddenl y di scover ed t hat a school boy named Vol kaKost yl kov, t he ver y same Vol ka who used t o l i ve on Thr ee Ponds St r eet , youknow, t he best di ver at summer camp l ast year . . . . On second t hought , Ibel i eve we had bet t er begi n f r om t he begi nni ng. . . . "

    CONTENTS

    A Most Unusual Mor ni ngThe St r ange VesselThe Ol d Geni e The Geography Exami nat i onHot t abych' s Second Servi ceAn Unusual Event at t he Movi es A Troubl ed Eveni ngA Chapt er Whi ch I s a Cont i nuat i on of t he Pr evi ous OneA Rest l ess Ni ght

    The Unusual Event s i n Apar t mentA No Less Troubl ed Mor ni ngWhy S. S. Pi vor aki Became Less Tal kat i veAn I nt er vi ew wi t h a Di verChar t i ng a Fl i ght

    The Fl i ghtZhenya Bogor ad' s Advent ures Far Away i n the East

    Tr a- l a- l a, i bn Al yosha!Meet My Fr i endHave Mercy on Us, Mi ght y Rul er !I t ' s So Embar r assi ng t o Be an I l l i t er at e Geni eWho' s t he Ri chest ?A Camel i n the St r eetA Myst er i ous Happeni ng i n t he BankHot t abych and Si dorel l iA Hospi t al Under t he BedOne i n Whi ch We Ret urn t o t he Bar ki ng Boy

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    Hot t abych and Mr . MoneybagsHassan Abdur r akhman i bn Hot t ab' s St ory of Hi s Advent ur es Af t er Leavi ng

    t he ShopThe Same and Mr . MoneybagsExtr a Ti cket sI ce- Cr eam Agai nHow Many Foot bal l s Do You Need?Hot t abych Ent er s t he Game

    The Si t uat i on Becomes Mor e Tense

    Reconci l i at i onWhere Shoul d They Look f or Omar ?The St or y Tol d by t he Conduct or of t he Moscow- Odessa Express of What

    Happened on t he Nara- Mal y Yar osl avet s Li neThe St r ange Sai l i ng Shi pAboar d t he "Sweet Omar "

    The "VK- 1" Magi c- Car pet - Seapl aneHot t abych I s Lost and Found Agai n

    The Vessel Fr om t he Pi l l ar s of Her cul esThe Shor t est Chapt er of Al lDr eami ng of t he "Ladoga"A Commot i on at t he Cent r al Excursi on BureauWho I s Most Famous?

    The Unexpect ed Encount er

    What I nt erf er es wi t h Sl eepi ng?Shi pwr ecked?Hot t abych at Hi s Best"Sal aam, Sweet Omar ! "Omar Asaf Bar es Hi s Cl awsWhat Good Opt i cal I nst r ument s Can Lead ToHott abych' s Fat al Passi onHot t abych' s New Year Vi si tEpi l ogue

    A MOST UNUSUAL MORNI NG

    At 7: 32 a. m. a merr y sun- spot sl i pped thr ough a hol e i n the cur t ai n andset t l ed on t he nose of Vol ka Kostyl kov, a 6t h- gr ade pupi l . Vol ka sneezed andwoke up.

    J ust t hen, he heard hi s mot her say i n t he next r oom:"Don' t r ush, Al yosha. Let t he chi l d sl eep a bi t l onger , he has an exam

    t oday. "Vol ka wi nced. When, oh when, woul d hi s mother st op cal l i ng hi m a chi l d?"Nonsense!" he coul d hear hi s f ather answer. "The boy' s nearl y

    t hi r t een. He mi ght as wel l get up and hel p us pack. Bef ore you know i t , t hi schi l d of your s wi l l be usi ng a r azor . "

    How coul d he have f or got t en about t he packi ng!Vol ka t hr ew of f t he bl anket s and dressed hur r i edl y. How coul d he ever

    have f orgot t en such a day!Thi s was t he day t he Kost yl kov f ami l y was movi ng t o a di f f er ent

    apar t ment i n a new si x- st orey house. Most of t hei r bel ongi ngs had beenpacked t he ni ght bef ore. Mot her and Gr andma had packed t he di shes i n al i t t l e t i n t ub t hat once, ver y l ong ago, they had bat hed Vol ka i n. Hi sf at her had r ol l ed up hi s sl eeves and, wi t h a mout hf ul of nai l s, j ust l i ke ashoemaker , had spent t he eveni ng hammer i ng down t he l i ds on cr at es of books.

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    Then t hey had al l argued as t o t he best pl ace t o put t he t hi ngs so ast o have t hem handy when t he t r uck ar r i ved i n t he mor ni ng. Then t hey hadt hei r t ea on an uncovered t abl e- as on a march. Then t hey deci ded t hei r headswoul d be cl earer af t er a good ni ght ' s sl eep and t hey al l went t o bed.

    I n a word, t here was j ust no expl ai ni ng how he coul d have everf or got t en t hat t hi s was t he morni ng t hey, were movi ng t o a new apar t ment .

    The mover s barged i n bef or e br eakf ast was qui t e over . The f i r st t hi ngt hey di d was t o open wi de bot h hal ves of t he door and ask i n l oud voi ces,"Wel l , can we begi n?"

    "Yes, pl ease do, " bot h Mot her and Gr andma answered and began t o bust l eabout .Vol ka marched downst ai r s, sol emnl y car r yi ng t he sof a pi l l ows t o t he

    wai t i ng t r uck."Ar e you movi ng?" a boy f r om next door asked."Yes, " Vol ka answered i ndi f f erent l y, as t hough he was used t o movi ng

    f r om one apar t ment t o anot her every week and t her e was not hi ng ver y speci alabout i t .

    The j ani t or , St epanych, wal ked over , sl owl y r ol l ed a ci garet t e andbegan an unhur r i ed conver sat i on as one gr own- up t al k t o another . The boyf el t di zzy wi t h pr i de and happi ness. He gather ed hi s cour age and i nvi t edSt epanych t o vi si t t hem at t hei r new home. The j ani t or sai d, "Wi t hpl easure. " A ser i ous, i mpor t ant , man- t o- man conver sat i on was begi nni ng, whenal l at once Vol ka' s mot her ' s voi ce came t hr ough t he open wi ndow:

    "Vol ka! Vol ka! Wher e can t hat awf ul chi l d be?" Vol ka r aced up t o t hest r angel y l ar ge and empty apar t ment i n whi ch shr eds of ol d newspapers andol d medi ci ne bot t l es wer e l yi ng f or l or nl y about t he f l oor .

    "At l ast! " hi s mot her sai d. "Take your preci ous aquar i um and get r i ghti nt o t he t r uck. I want you t o si t on t he sof a and hol d t he aquar i um on yourl ap. Ther e' s no other pl ace f or i t . But be sur e t he water doesn' t spl ash ont he sof a. "

    I t ' s r eal l y st r ange, t he way parent s wor r y when they' r e movi ng to a newapar t ment .

    THE STRANGE VESSEL

    Wel l , t he t r uck f i nal l y choked exhaust edl y and st opped at t heat t r act i ve ent r ance of Vol ka' s new house. The mover s qui ckl y carr i edever yt hi ng upst ai r s and soon were gone.

    Vol ka' s f at her opened a f ew cr ates and sai d, "We' l l do t he r est i n t heeveni ng. " Then he l ef t f or t he f act or y.

    Mot her and Gr andma began unpacki ng t he pots and pans, whi l e Vol kadeci ded t o r un down to t he r i ver nearby. Hi s f ather had warned hi m not t o goswi mmi ng wi t hout hi m, because the r i ver was ver y deep, but Vol ka soon f oundan excuse: " I have t o go i n f or a di p t o cl ear my head. How can I t ake anexam wi t h a f uzzy br ai n! "

    I t ' s wonder f ul , t he way Vol ka was al ways abl e t o t hi nk of an excusewhen he was about t o do somet hi ng he was not al l owed to do.

    How conveni ent i t i s t o have a r i ver near your house! Vol ka t ol d hi smot her he' d go si t on t he bank and st udy hi s geography.

    And he r eal l y and t r ul y i nt ended t o spend about t en mi nut es l eaf i ngt hrough t he t ext - book. However , he got undr essed and j umped i nto t he wat ert he mi nut e he r eached t he r i ver . I t was st i l l earl y, and t her e was not asoul on t he bank. Thi s had i t s good and bad poi nt s. I t was ni ce, because noone coul d st op hi m f r om swi mmi ng as much as he l i ked. I t was bad, becauset her e was no one t o admi r e what a good swi mmer and especi al l y what anext r aor di nary di ver he was.

    Vol ka swam and di ved unt i l he became bl ue. Fi nal l y, he r eal i zed he hadhad enough. He was r eady t o cl i mb out when he suddenl y changed hi s mi nd and

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    deci ded t o di ve i nt o t he cl ear water one l ast t i me.As he was about t o come up f or ai r , hi s hand hi t a l ong hard obj ect on

    t he bot t om. He gr abbed i t and sur f aced near t he shor e, hol di ng ast r ange- l ooki ng sl i pper y, moss- cover ed cl ay vessel . I t r esembl ed an anci entt ype of Gr eek vase cal l ed an amphora. The neck was seal ed t i ght l y wi t h agr een subst ance and what l ooked l i ke a seal was i mpr i nt ed on t op.

    Vol ka wei ghed t he vessel i n hi s hand. I t was very heavy. He caught hi sbr eath.

    A t r easur e! An anci ent t r easur e of gr eat sci ent i f i c val ue! How

    wonder f ul !He dr essed qui ckl y and dashed home t o open i t i n t he pr i vacy of hi sr oom.

    As he r an al ong, he coul d vi sual i ze t he noti ce whi ch woul d cer t ai nl yappear i n al l t he papers t he next morni ng. He even t hought of a headi ng: "APi oneer Ai ds Sci ence. "

    "Yest erday, a pi oneer named Vl adi mi r Kost yl kov came t o hi s di st r i ctmi l i t i a st at i on and handed t he of f i cer on dut y a t r easur e consi st i ng ofant i que gol d obj ect s whi ch he f ound on t he bot t om of t he r i ver , i n a ver ydeep pl ace. The t r easur e has been handed over t o t he Hi st or i cal Museum.Accor di ng t o r el i abl e sour ces, Vl adi mi r Kost yl kov i s an excel l ent di ver . "

    Vol ka sl i pped by t he ki t chen, where hi s mot her was cooki ng di nner . Hedashed i nt o hi s r oom, near l y br eaki ng hi s l eg as he st umbl ed on a chandel i erl yi ng on t he f l oor . I t was Gr andma' s f amous chandel i er . Ver y l ong ago,

    bef or e t he Revol ut i on, hi s deceased gr andf ather had conver t ed i t f r om ahangi ng oi l l amp. Gr andma woul d not par t wi t h i t f or anythi ng i n t he worl d,because i t was a t r easured memory of Gr andf at her . Si nce i t was not el egantenough t o be hung i n t he di ni ng r oom, t hey deci ded t o hang i t i n Vol ka' sr oom. That i s why a huge i r on hook had been scr ewed i nt o t he cei l i ng.

    Vol ka r ubbed hi s sore knee, l ocked t he door , t ook hi s penkni f e f r om hi spocket and, t r embl i ng f r omexci t ement , scr aped t he seal of f t he bot t l e.

    The r oom i mmedi at el y f i l l ed wi t h choki ng bl ack smoke, whi l e a noi sel essexpl osi on of gr eat f orce t hr ew hi m up t o t he cei l i ng, wher e he r emai nedsuspended f r om t he hook by the seat of hi s pant s.

    THE OLD GENI E

    Whi l e Vol ka was swayi ng back and f or t h on t he hook, t r yi ng t ounder st and what had happened, t he smoke began t o cl ear . Suddenl y, her eal i zed t her e was someone el se i n t he r oom besi des hi msel f . I t was aski nny, sunbur nt ol d man wi t h a bear d down t o hi s wai st and dressed i n anel egant t ur ban, a whi t e coat of f i ne wool r i chl y embr oi der ed i n si l ver andgol d, gl eami ng whi t e si l k puf f ed t r ouser s and pet al pi nk morocco sl i pper swi t h upt ur ned t oes.

    "Hachoo! " t he ol d man sneezed l oudl y and pr ost r ated hi msel f . " I gr eetyou, 0 Wonder f ul and Wi se Yout h!"

    Vol ka shut hi s eyes t i ght and t hen opened t hem agai n. No, he was notseei ng thi ngs. The amazi ng ol d man was st i l l t her e. Kneel i ng and rubbi ng hi shands, he st ar ed at t he f ur ni shi ngs of Vol ka' s r oom wi t h l i vel y, shr ewdeyes, as i f i t wer e al l goodness- knows what sort of a mi r acl e.

    "Wher e di d you come f r om?" Vol ka i nqui r ed caut i ousl y, swayi ng back andf ort h under t he cei l i ng l i ke a pendul um. "Ar e you. . . f r om an amat eurt r oupe?"

    "Oh, no, my young l ord, " t he ol d man r epl i ed grandl y, t hough her emai ned i n t he same uncomf or t abl e pose and cont i nued t o sneeze. " I am notf r om t he st r ange count r y of Anamat eur Troupe you ment i oned. I come f r om t hi smost hor r i bl e vessel . "

    Wi t h t hese wor ds he scr ambl ed t o hi s f eet and began j umpi ng on t hevessel , f r om whi ch a wi sp of smoke was st i l l cur l i ng upwar d, unt i l t her e was

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    not hi ng l ef t but a smal l pi l e of cl ay chi ps. Then, wi t h a sound l i ket i nkl i ng cr yst al war e, he yanked a hai r f r om hi s bear d and t or e i t i n t wo.

    The bi t s of cl ay f l ar ed up wi t h a wei r d green f l ame unt i l soon t here was nota t r ace of t hem l ef t on t he f l oor .

    St i l l , Vol ka was dubi ous. You must agr ee, i t ' s not easy t o accept t hef act t hat a l i ve per son can cr awl out of a vessel no bi gger t han a decant er .

    "Wel l , I don' t know. . . " Vol ka st ammered. "The vessel was so smal l , andyou' r e so bi g compar ed t o i t . "

    "You don' t bel i eve me, 0 despi cabl e one?! " t he ol d man shouted angr i l y,

    but i mmedi atel y cal med down; once agai n he f el l t o hi s knees, hi t t i ng t hef l oor wi t h hi s f orehead so st r ongl y t hat t he wat er shook i n t he aquar i um andt he sl eepy f i sh began t o dar t back and f ort h anxi ousl y. "Forgi ve me, myyoung savi our , but I am not used t o havi ng my words doubt ed. Know ye, mostbl essed of al l young men, t hat I am none other t han t he mi ght y Geni e HassanAbdur r akhman i bn Hot t ab- t hat i s, t he son of Hot t ab, f amed i n al l f ourcor ner s of t he wor l d. "

    Al l t hi s was so i nt er est i ng i t made Vol ka f orget he was hangi ng undert he cei l i ng on a chandel i er hook.

    "A ' gi n- e' ? I sn' t t hat some ki nd of a dr i nk?""I am not a dr i nk, 0 i nqui si t i ve yout h! " t he ol d man f l ar ed up agai n,

    t hen t ook hi msel f i n hand once more and cal med down. " I am not a beverage,but a mi ght y, unconquer abl e spi r i t . Ther e i s no magi c i n t he worl d whi ch Icannot do, and my name, as I have al r eady had t he pl easur e of conveyi ng t o

    your great and ext r emel y r espected at t ent i on, i s Hassan Abdur r akhman i bnHot t ab, or , as you woul d say i n Russi an, Hassan Abdur r akhman Hot t abych. I fyou ment i on i t t o t he f i r st I f r i t or Geni e you meet , you' l l see hi m t r embl e,and hi s mout h wi l l go dr y f r omf ear , " t he ol d man cont i nued boastf ul l y.

    "My st or y- hachoo! - i s st r ange, i ndeed. And i f i t wer e wr i t t en wi t hneedl es i n t he cor ner s of t he eyes, i t woul d be a good l esson f or al l t hosewho seek l ear ni ng. I , most unf or t unat e Geni e t hat I am, di sobeyed Sul ayman,son of Davi d ( on t he t wai n be peace! ) - I , and my br ot her , Omar AsafHot t abych. Then Sul ayman sent hi s Vi zi er Asaf , son of Barakhi ya, t o sei zeus, and he br ought us back agai nst our wi l l . Sul ayman, Davi d' s son ( on t het wai n be peace! ) , or der ed t wo bot t l es br ought t o hi m: a copper one and acl ay one. He put me i n t he cl ay vessel and my br ot her Omar Hot t abych i n t hecopper one. He seal ed bot h vessel s and i mpr i nt ed t he great est of al l names

    of Al l ah on t hem and t hen ordered hi s Geni es t o car r y us of f and t hr ow mybr other i nt o t he sea and me i nt o t he r i ver , f r omwhi ch you, 0 my bl essedsavi our - hachoo, hachoo! - have f i shed me. May your days be pr ol onged. 0. . . .Beggi ng your par don, I woul d be i ndescr i babl y happy t o know your name, mostbeaut i f ul of al l yout hs. "

    "My name' s Vol ka, " our hero r epl i ed as he swayed sof t l y t o and f r ounder t he cei l i ng.

    "And what i s your f or t unat e f ather ' s name, may he be bl essed f oret er ni t y? Tel l me t he most gent l e of al l hi s names, as he i s cer t ai nl ydeser vi ng of gr eat l ove and gr at i t ude f or pr esent i ng t he worl d wi t h such anout st andi ng of f spr i ng. "

    "Hi s name' s Al exei . And hi s most gent l e . . . most gent l e name i sAl yosha. "

    "Then know ye, most deser vi ng of al l yout hs, t he st ar of my hear t ,

    Vol ka i bn Al yosha, t hat I wi l l hencef or t h f ul f i l al l your wi shes, si nce youhave saved me f r om t he most hor r i bl e i mpr i sonment . Hachoo! "

    "Why do you keep on sneezi ng so?" Vol ka asked, as t hough ever yt hi ngel se was qui t e cl ear .

    "The many t housand year s I spent i n dampness, depr i ved of t hebenef i ci al r ays of t he sun, i n a col d vessel l yi ng on t he bot t om of a r i ver ,have gi ven me, your undeser vi ng ser vant , a most t i r esome r unni ng nose.Hachoo! Hachoo! But al l t hi s i s of no i mport ance at al l and unwort hy of yourmost t r easur ed at t ent i on. Or der me as you wi sh, 0 young mast er ! " HassanAbdur r akhman i bn Hot t ab concl uded heatedl y wi t h hi s head r ai sed, but s t i l lkneel i ng.

    "Fi r st of al l , won' t you pl ease r i se, " Vol ka sai d."Your every word i s my command, " t he ol d man r epl i ed obedi ent l y and

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    r ose. "I awai t your f ur t her or der s. ""And now, " Vol ka mumbl ed uncer t ai nl y, " i f i t ' s not t oo much t r oubl e . .

    . woul d you be ki nd enough . . . of cour se, i f i t ' s not t oo much t r oubl e. . . .What I mean i s, I ' d r eal l y l i ke t o be back on t he f l oor agai n. "

    That ver y moment he f ound hi msel f st andi ng besi de ol d man Hot t abych, aswe shal l cal l our new acquai nt ance f or shor t . The f i r st t hi ng Vol ka di d wast o gr ab t he seat of hi s pant s. Ther e was no hol e at al l .

    Mi r acl es were begi nni ng t o happen.

    THE GEOGRAPHY EXAMI NATI ON

    "Or der me as you wi sh! " Hot t abych cont i nued, gazi ng at Vol ka devot edl y." I s t her e anyt hi ng t hat gr i eves you, 0 Vol ka i bn Al yosha? Tel l me, and Iwi l l hel p you. "

    "My goodness! " Vol ka cr i ed, gl anci ng at t he cl ock t i cki ng away l oudl yon t he t abl e. "I ' m l at e! I ' m l at e f or my exam! "

    "What are you l ate f or, 0 most t r easur ed Vol ka i bn Al yosha?" Hot t abychasked i n a busi ness- l i ke way. "What does t hat st r ange word ' ex- am' mean?"

    "I t ' s t he same as a t est . I ' m l at e f or my t est at school . ""Then know ye, 0 Vol ka, t hat you do not val ue my powers at al l , " t he

    ol d man sai d i n a hur t voi ce. "No, no, and no agai n! You wi l l not be l at ef or your exam. J ust t el l me what your choi ce i s:

    t o hol d up t he exam, or t o f i nd your sel f i mmedi atel y at your schoolgates?"

    "To f i nd mysel f at t he gates, " Vol ka r epl i ed."Nothi ng coul d be si mpl er! You wi l l now f i nd your sel f wher e your young

    and honour abl e spi r i t dr aws you so i mpat i ent l y. You wi l l st un your t eacher sand your comr ades wi t h your great knowl edge. "

    Wi t h t he same pl easant t i nkl i ng sound t he ol d man once agai n pul l ed ahai r f r om hi s beard; t hen a second one.

    "I ' m af r ai d I won' t st un t hem, " Vol ka si ghed, qui ckl y changi ng i nt o hi sschool uni f or m. "To t el l you t he t r ut h, I have l i t t l e chance of get t i ng an

    ' A' i n geogr aphy. "" I n geogr aphy?" t he ol d man cr i ed and r ai sed hi s t hi n hai r y arms

    t r i umphant l y. "So you' r e t o t ake an exam i n geography?! Then know ye, 0 mostwonder f ul of al l wonder f ul ones, t hat you ar e except i onal l y l ucky, f or Iknow mor e about geography t han any ot her Geni e- I , your devot ed HassanAbdur r akhman i bn Hot t ab. We shal l go t o school t ogether , may i t s f oundat i onand r oof be bl essed! I ' l l pr ompt you i nvi si bl y and t el l you al l t he answer s.

    You wi l l become t he most f amous pupi l of your school and of al l t he school sof your most beaut i f ul ci t y. And i f anyone of your t eacher s does not accor dyou t he gr eat est pr ai se, he wi l l have t o deal wi t h me! Oh, t hey wi l l bever y, ver y sor r y!" Hot t abych r aged. "I ' l l t ur n t hem i nt o mul es t hat car r ywater , i nt o homel ess cur s cover ed wi t h scabs, i nt o t he most hor r i bl e andobnoxi ous t oads- t hat ' s what I ' l l do to them! However , " he sai d, cal mi ng downas qui ckl y as he had become enr aged, "t hi ngs wi l l not go t hat f ar , f oreveryone, 0 Vol ka i bn Al yosha, wi l l be ast ounded by your answers. "

    ' "Thank you, Hassan Hot t abych, " Vol ka si ghed mi serabl y. "Thank you,but I don' t want you t o prompt me. We pi oneer s are agai nst prompt i ng as amatt er of pr i nci pl e. We' r e conduct i ng an or gani zed f i ght agai nst pr ompt i ng. "

    Now, how coul d an ol d Geni e who had spent so many years i n pr i son knowsuch a schol arl y t er m as "a matt er of pr i nci pl e"? However , t he si gh hi syoung savi our heaved t o accompany hi s sad and honour abl e wor ds convi ncedHot t abych t hat Vol ka i bn Al yosha needed hi s hel p more t han ever bef ore.

    "Your r ef usal gr i eves me, " Hot t abych sai d. "Af t er al l , no one wi l lnot i ce me pr ompt i ng you. "

    "Ha!" Vol ka sai d bi t t er l y. "You don' t know what keen ear s our t eacherVar vara St epanovna has. "

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    "You not onl y upset me, you now of f end me, 0 Vol ka i bn Al yosha! I fHassan Abdurr akhman i bn Hot t ab says t hat no one wi l l not i ce, i t means no onewi l l not i ce!"

    "Not a si ngl e soul ?" Vol ka asked agai n, j ust t o make sure."Not a si ngl e soul . The wor ds whi ch I wi l l have the pl easur e of t el l i ng

    you wi l l go st r ai ght f r om my def er ent i al l i ps t o your gr eat l y r espect edear s. "

    " I r eal l y don' t know what t o do, Hassan Hot t abych, " Vol ka sai d si ghi ng,as t hough wi t h r el uct ance. "I r eal l y hate t o upset you by r ef usi ng. Al l

    r i ght , have your own way! Geography i sn' t Mat h or Gr ammar . I ' d never agreet o even t he t i ni est pr ompt i n t hose subj ect s, but si nce geogr aphy i sn' tr eal l y t he most i mpor t ant subj ect . . . . Come on, l et ' s hur r y!" He l ooked att he ol d man' s unusual cl ot hi ng wi t h a cr i t i cal eye. "Hm- m- m. . . . D' you t hi nkyou coul d change i nto somethi ng el se, Hassan Hot t abych?"

    "Don' t my gar ment s pl ease your gaze, 0 most nobl e of Vol kas?" Hot t abychasked unhappi l y.

    "Sur e t hey do, t hey cer t ai nl y do, " Vol ka answer ed di pl omat i cal l y. "Butyou' r e dr essed . . . i f you know what I mean. . . . Our st yl es ar e a l i t t l e bi tdi f f er ent . . . . Your cl ot hes wi l l at t r act t oo much at t ent i on. "

    "But how do r espect abl e, honour abl e gent l emen of advanced age dressnowadays?"

    Vol ka t r i ed t o expl ai n what a j acket , t r ousers and a hat were, butt hough he t r i ed ver y hard, he wasn' t ver y successf ul . He was about t o

    despai r , when he suddenl y gl anced at hi s grandf at her ' s por t r ai t on the wal l .He l ed Hot t abych over t o t he t i me- darkened phot ogr aph and t he ol d man gazedl ong at i t wi t h cur i osi t y, sur pr i sed t o see cl ot hi ng so unl i ke hi s own.

    A moment l ater , Vol ka, hol di ng Hot t abych' s ar m, emerged f r om t he house.The ol d man was magni f i cent i n a new l i nen sui t , an embroi dered Ukr ai ni anshi r t , and a st r aw boat er . The onl y t hi ngs he had r ef used t o change,compl ai ni ng of t hr ee t housand- year- ol d cor ns, wer e hi s sl i pper s. He r emai nedi n hi s pi nk sl i pper s wi t h t he upt ur ned t oes, whi ch, i n t i mes gone by, woul dhave pr obabl y dr i ven the most st yl i sh young man at t he Cour t of Cal i ph Harunal Rashi d out of hi s mi nd wi t h envy.

    When Vol ka and a t r ansf or med Hot t abych approached t he ent r ance ofMoscow Secondar y School No. 245 t he ol d man l ooked at hi msel f coyl y i n t hegl ass door and remai ned qui t e pl eased wi t h what he saw.

    The el der l y doorman, who was sedat el y r eadi ng hi s paper , put i t asi dewi t h pl easur e at t he si ght of Vol ka and hi s compani on. I t was hot and t hedoor man f el t l i ke t al ki ng to someone.

    Ski ppi ng sever al st eps at a t i me, Vol ka dashed upst ai r s. The cor r i dor swere qui et and empty, a t r ue and sad si gn t hat t he exami nat i on had begun andt hat he was l ate.

    "And wher e ar e you goi ng?" t he door man asked Hot t abych good- nat uredl yas he was about t o f ol l ow hi s young f r i end i n.

    "He' s come t o see t he pr i nci pal , " Vol ka shout ed f r omt he t op ' of t hestai r s .

    "You won' t be abl e t o see hi m now. He' s at an exami nat i on. Won' t youpl ease come by agai n l ater on i n the day?"

    Hot t abych f r owned angr i l y."I f I be per mi t t ed t o, 0 r espect ed ol d man, I woul d pr ef er t o wai t f or

    hi m her e. " Then he shout ed t o Vol ka, "Hur r y t o your cl assr oom, 0 Vol ka i bnAl yosha! I ' m cer t ai n t hat you' l l astound your t eacher s and your comr adeswi t h your gr eat knowl edge!"

    "Ar e you hi s grandf ather or somethi ng?" t he door man i nqui r ed, t r yi ng t ost ar t up a conver sat i on. Hott abych sai d not hi ng. He f el t i t beneat h hi sdi gni t y t o conver se wi t h a door keeper.

    "Woul d you care f or a cup of t ea?" t he door man cont i nued. "The heat ' ssomet hi ng t er r i bl e t oday. "

    He pour ed a f ul l cup of t ea and, t ur ni ng t o hand i t t o t he unt al kat i vest r anger , he saw t o hi s horr or that t he ol d man had di sappear ed i nt o t hi nai r . Shaken by t hi s i mpossi bl e occur r ence, t he door man gul ped down t he t eai nt ended f or Hot t abych, pour ed hi msel f a second cup, and t hen a t hi r d, anddi d not st op unt i l t her e wasn' t a dr op l ef t . Then he sank i nt o hi s chai r and

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    began t o f an hi msel f exhaust edl y wi t h hi s newspaper .Al l t he whi l e, a no l ess unusual scene was t aki ng pl ace on t he second

    f l oor , r i ght above t he door man, i n the cl assr oom of 6B. The t eacher s, headedby t he pr i nci pal , Pavel Vasi l yevi ch, sat at a t abl e cover ed wi t h a heavycl oth used f or speci al occasi ons. Behi nd t hem was t he bl ackboar d, hung wi t hvar i ous maps. Faci ng t hem wer e r ows of sol emn pupi l s. I t was so qui et i n t her oom t hat one coul d hear a l onel y f l y buzzi ng monotonousl y near t he cei l i ng.I f t he pupi l s of 6B wer e al ways thi s qui et , t hei r s woul d undoubt edl y be t hemost di sci pl i ned cl ass i n al l of Moscow.

    I t must be noted, however , t hat t he qui et i n t he cl assr oom was not onl ydue t o t he hush accompanyi ng any exami nat i on, but al so t o t he f act t hatVol ka Kost yl kov had been cal l ed t o the board- and he was not i n t he r oom.

    "Vl adi mi r Kostyl kov!" the pr i nci pal r epeat ed and l ooked at t he qui etchi l dr en i n sur pr i se.

    I t became st i l l mor e qui et .Then, suddenl y, t hey heard t he l oud cl at t er of r unni ng f eet i n t he hal l

    out si de, and at t he ver y moment t he pr i nci pal cal l ed "Vl adi mi r Kostyl kov"f or t he thi r d and l ast t i me, t he door bur st open and Vol ka, ver y much out ofbr eat h, gasped:

    "Her e! ""Pl ease come up t o t he boar d, " t he pr i nci pal sai d dr yl y. " We' l l speak

    about your bei ng l at e af t er wards. ""I . . . I f eel i l l , " Vol ka mumbl ed, sayi ng t he f i r st t hi ng t hat came t o

    hi s head, as he wal ked uncer t ai nl y towards hi s exami ners.Whi l e he was wonder i ng whi ch of t he sl i ps of paper l ai d out on t he

    t abl e he shoul d choose, ol d man Hot t abych sl i pped t hrough t he wal l i n t hecorr i dor and di sappeared t hr ough t he opposi t e one i nt o an adj oi ni ngcl assr oom. He had an absor bed l ook on hi s f ace.

    Vol ka f i nal l y t ook t he f i r st sl i p hi s hand t ouched. Tempt i ng hi s f at e,he t ur ned i t over ver y sl owl y, but was pl easant l y sur pr i sed t o see t hat hewas to speak on I ndi a. He knew qui t e a l ot about I ndi a, si nce he had al waysbeen i nt er est ed i n t hat count r y.

    "Wel l , l et ' s hear what you have to say, " t he pr i nci pal sai d.Vol ka even r emember ed t he begi nni ng of t he chapter on I ndi a word f or

    word as i t was i n hi s book. He opened hi s mout h t o say t hat t he Hi ndust anPeni nsul a r esembl ed a t r i angl e and t hat t hi s t r i angl e bor der ed on t he I ndi an

    Ocean and i t s var i ous par t s: t he Ar abi an Sea i n t he West and t he Bay ofBengal i n t he East , t hat t wo l ar ge count r i es- I ndi a and Paki st an- wer e l ocat edon t he peni nsul a, t hat both wer e i nhabi t ed by ki ndl y and peace- l ovi ngpeopl es wi t h r i ch and anci ent cul t ur es, et c. , et c. , et c. , but j ust t henHott abych, st andi ng i n t he adj oi ni ng cl assr oom, l eaned agai nst t he wal l andbegan mumbl i ng di l i gent l y, cuppi ng hi s hand t o hi s mout h l i ke a horn:

    "I ndi a, 0 my most r espect ed teacher . . . ! "And suddenl y Vol ka, cont r ary t o hi s own desi r es, began t o pour f ort h

    t he most at r oci ous nonsense:" I ndi a, 0 my most r espect ed t eacher , i s l ocat ed cl ose t o t he edge of

    t he Ear t h' s di sc and i s separat ed f r om t hi s edge by desol ate and unexpl oreddeser t s, as nei t her ani mal s nor bi r ds l i ve t o t he east of i t . I ndi a i s aver y weal t hy count r y, and i t s weal t h l i es i n i t s gol d. Thi s i s not dug f r omt he gr ound as i n other count r i es, but i s pr oduced, day and ni ght , by a

    t i r el ess speci es of gol d- bear i ng ant s, whi ch are near l y t he si ze of a dog.They di g t hei r t unnel s i n t he gr ound and t hr ee t i mes a day t hey br i ng upgol d sand and nugget s and pi l e t hem i n huge heaps. But woe be t o t hoseI ndi ans who t r y t o st eal t hi s gol d wi t hout due ski l l ! The ant s pur sue t hemand, over t aki ng t hem, ki l l t hem on t he spot . From t he nor t h and west , I ndi aborder s on a count r y of bal d peopl e. The men and women and even t he chi l drenar e al l bal d i n t hi s count r y. And t hese st r ange peopl e l i ve on r aw f i sh andpi ne cones. St i l l cl oser t o t hem i s a count r y wher e you can nei t her seeanyt hi ng nor pass, as i t i s f i l l ed t o t he t op wi t h f eat her s. The ear t h andt he ai r ar e f i l l ed wi t h f eat her s, and t hat i s why you can' t see anythi ngt her e. "

    "Wai t a mi nut e, Kost yl kov, " t he geogr aphy t eacher sai d wi t h a smi l e."No one has asked you t o t el l us of t he anci ent s' vi ews on Asi a' s geogr aphy.

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    We' d l i ke you t o t el l us t he moder n, sci ent i f i c f act s about I ndi a. "Oh, how happy Vol ka woul d have been t o di spl ay hi s knowl edge of t he

    subj ect ! But what coul d he do i f he was no l onger t he mast er of hi s speechand act i ons! I n agr eei ng t o have Hot t abych prompt hi m, he became a t oy i nt he ol d man' s wel l - meani ng but i gnorant hands. He want ed t o t el l hi st eachers t hat what he had t ol d t hem obvi ousl y had not hi ng t o do wi t h modernsci ence. But Hot t abych on t he other si de of t he wal l shrugged i n di smay andshook hi s head, and Vol ka, st andi ng i n f r ont of t he cl ass, was compel l ed t odo t he same.

    "That whi ch I have had t he honour of t el l i ng you, 0 gr eat l y r espect edVarvar a St epanovna, i s based on t he most r el i abl e sour ces, and t her e exi stno ot her , mor e sci ent i f i c f act s on I ndi a t han t hose I have j ust , wi t h yourper mi ssi on, r eveal ed to you. "

    "Pl ease keep t o t he subj ect . Thi s i s an exami nat i on, not a masquerade.I f you don' t know t he answers, i t woul d be much more honourabl e t o admi t i tr i ght away. What was i t you sai d about t he Ear t h' s di sc by t he way? Don' tyou know t hat t he Ear t h i s r ound?"

    Di d Vol ka Kost yl kov, an act i ve member of t he Moscow Pl anetar i um' sAst r onomy Cl ub, know t hat t he Ear t h was r ound? Why, any f i r st - gr ader knewt hat . But Hot t abych, st andi ng behi nd t he wal l , bur st out l aughi ng, and nomat t er how our poor boy t r i ed t o pr ess hi s l i ps t oget her , a haught y smi r kescaped hi m:

    " I pr esume you are maki ng f un of your most devot ed pupi l ! I f t he Ear t h

    were r ound, t he wat er woul d r un of f i t , and t hen everyone woul d di e oft hi r st and al l t he pl ant s woul d dr y up. The Eart h, 0 most nobl e and honour edof al l t eacher s and pedagogues, has al ways had and does now have t he shapeof a f l at di sc, sur r ounded on al l si des by a mi ght y r i ver named ' Ocean. ' TheEart h r est s on si x el ephant s, and t hey, i n t ur n, ar e st andi ng on at r emendous t ur t l e. That i s how t he worl d i s made, 0 teacher ! "

    The board of t eachers gazed at Vol ka wi t h r i si ng sur pr i se. He br oke outi n a col d sweat f r om hor r or and t he r eal i zat i on of hi s own compl et ehel pl essness. The other chi l dr en coul d not qui t e unders t and what hadhappened t o t hei r f r i end, but some began t o gi ggl e. I t was r eal l y f unny t ohear about a count r y of bal d peopl e, about a count r y f i l l ed wi t h f eather s,about gol d- bear i ng ant s as bi g as dogs and about t he f l at Ear t h r est i ng onsi x el ephant s and a t ur t l e. As f or Zhenya Bogor ad, Vol ka' s best f r i end and

    one of t he cl ass pi oneer l eaders, he became r eal l y wor r i ed. He knew t hatVol ka, as chai r man of t he Ast r onomy Cl ub, at l east knew t hat t he Ear t h wasr ound- i f he knew not hi ng el se. Coul d i t be t hat he had suddenl y deci ded uponsome mi schi ef , and dur i ng an exami nat i on, of al l t i mes! Vol ka was pr obabl yi l l , but what ai l ed hi m? What ki nd of a st r ange, unusual di sease di d hehave? And t hen, i t was ver y bad f or thei r pi oneer gr oup. So f ar, t hey hadbeen f i r st i n al l t he exams, but now Vol ka' s st upi d answer s woul d spoi lever ythi ng, t hough he was usual l y a di sci pl i ned pi oneer ! Goga Pi l uki n, amost unpl easant boy at t he next desk ( ni cknamed "Pi l l " by hi s cl assmates) ,hast ened t o pour sal t on Zhenya' s f r esh wounds.

    "That t akes care of your gr oup, Zhenya dear , " he whi sper ed wi t h amal i ci ous gi ggl e. "You' r e si nki ng f ast ! " Zhenya shook hi s f i st at Pi l l .

    "Varvar a St epanovna!" Goga whi ned. "Bogorad j ust shook hi s f i st at me. ""Si t st i l l and don' t t at t l e, " Var var a St epanovna sai d and t ur ned back

    t o Vol ka, who st ood bef ore her more dead t han al i ve. "Were you ser i ous aboutt he el ephant s and t he t ur t l e?" "More ser i ous t han ever bef ore, 0 mostr espect ed of al l t eacher s, " Vol ka r epeat ed af t er t he ol d man and f el thi msel f bur ni ng up wi t h shame.

    "And haven' t you anyt hi ng el se t o add? Do you r eal l y t hi nk you wereanswer i ng t he quest i on?"

    "No, I ' ve not hi ng t o add, " Hot t abych sai d behi nd t he wal l , shaki ng hi shead.

    And Vol ka, hel pl ess t o wi t hst and t he f orce t hat was pushi ng hi m t owardsf ai l ur e, al so shook hi s head and sai d, " No, I ' ve not hi ng t o add. Per haps,however , t he f act t hat i n t he weal t hy l and of I ndi a t he hor i zons ar e f r amedby gol d and pear l s. "

    "I t ' s i ncredi bl e! " hi s t eacher excl ai med.

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    I t was di f f i cul t t o bel i eve t hat Kost yl kov, a usual l y di sci pl i ned boy,had suddenl y deci ded t o pl ay a si l l y j oke on hi s t eacher s ( and at such ani mport ant t i me!) , r unni ng the r i sk of a second exami nat i on i n the aut umn.

    "I don' t t hi nk t he boy i s qui t e wel l , " Var var a St epanovna whi sper ed t ot he pr i nci pal .

    Gl anci ng hur r i edl y and sympat het i cal l y at Vol ka, who st ood numb wi t hgr i ef bef ore t hem, t he commi t t ee hel d a whi sper ed conf erence.

    Varvar a St epanovna suggest ed, "What i f we ask t he chi l d anot herquest i on, j ust t o cal m hi m? Say, f r om l ast year ' s book. Last year he got an

    ' A' i n geogr aphy. "The ot hers agreed, and Var var a St epanovna once agai n t ur ned t o t heunhappy boy.

    "Now, Kost yl kov, wi pe your t ears and don' t be ner vous. Tel l us what ahor i zon i s . "

    "A hor i zon?" Vol ka sai d wi t h new hope. "That ' s easy. A hori zon i s ani magi ned l i ne whi ch. . . . "

    But Hot t abych came t o l i f e behi nd t he wal l agai n and Vol ka once agai nbecame t he vi ct i m of pr ompt i ng.

    "The hori zon, 0 my most r ever ed one, " Vol ka corr ect ed hi msel f , " I woul dcal l t he hor i zon t hat br i nk, wher e t he cryst al cupol a of t he Heavens t ouchest he edge of t he Eart h. "

    " I t get s wor se as he goes on, " Var var a Stepanovna moaned. "How woul dyou have us underst and your words about t he cr yst al cupol a of t he

    Heavens- l i t er al l y or f i gur at i vel y?""Li t er al l y, 0 teacher , " Hot t abych pr ompt ed f r om t he next r oom.And Vol ka was obl i ged t o r epeat af t er hi m, "Li t er al l y, 0 t eacher . ""Fi gur at i vel y! " someone hi ssed f r om t he back of t he r oom. But Vol ka

    r epeat ed, "Nat ur al l y, i n t he l i t er al sense and no ot her . ""What does t hat mean?" Varvar a St epanovna asked, s t i l l not bel i evi ng

    her ear s. "Does t hat mean you consi der t he sky t o be a sol i d cupol a?""Yes. ""And does i t mean t her e' s a pl ace wher e the Ear t h ends?""Yes, t here i s, 0 my most hi ghl y respect ed t eacher . "Behi nd t he wal l Hot t abych nodded approvi ngl y and r ubbed hi s hands

    t ogether smugl y.A st r ange si l ence f el l on t he cl ass. Even t hose who wer e al ways r eady

    t o l augh st opped smi l i ng. Somet hi ng was def i ni t el y wr ong wi t h Vol ka. Varvar aSt epanovna r ose and f el t hi s f orehead anxi ousl y. He di d not have a f ever .But Hot t abych was real l y touched by t hi s. He bowed l ow and t ouched hi s

    f or ehead and chest i n t he East ern manner and t hen began t o whi sper . Vol ka,dr i ven by t he same awf ul f or ce, r epeat ed hi s movement s exact l y.

    " I t hank you, 0 most gr aci ous daught er of St epan! I t hank you f or yourt r oubl e. But i t i s unnecessar y, because, pr ai sed be Al l ah, I am qui t e wel l . "

    Al l t hi s sounded ext r emel y st r ange and f unny. However , t he otherchi l dr en were so wor r i ed about Vol ka t hat not a shade of a smi l e cr ossed asi ngl e f ace. Var var a St epanovna t ook hi m by t he hand, l ed hi m out of t her oom, and pat t ed hi s l owered head.

    "Never mi nd, Kost yl kov. Don' t wor r y. You' r e pr obabl y over t i r ed. Comeback when you' ve had a good rest . Al l r i ght ?"

    "Al l r i ght , " Vol ka sai d. "But upon my word of honour , Varvar a

    St epanovna, i t ' s not my f aul t ! I t i sn' t r eal l y! ""Why, I ' m not bl ami ng you at al l , " t he t eacher answer ed ki ndl y. "I ' l l

    t el l you what : l et ' s dr op i n on Pyot r I vanych. "Pyot r I vanych, t he school doct or , exami ned Vol ka f or al l of t en

    mi nut es. He made hi m cl ose hi s eyes and hol d hi s arms out bef ore hi m wi t hhi s f i nger s spread apart ; t hen he t apped hi s knee and dr ew l i nes on hi schest and back wi t h hi s st ethoscope.

    By t hen Vol ka came t o hi msel f . Hi s cheeks t ur ned pi nk agai n and hi sspi r i t s rose.

    "The boy' s per f ect l y wel l , " sai d Pyot r I vanych. "And i f you want myopi ni on, he' s an unusual l y heal t hy chi l d! I t hi nk he was pr obabl yover wor ked. He must have st udi ed t oo much bef or e hi s exams, because t her e' snot hi ng wr ong wi t h hi m. And t hat ' s al l t her e i s t o i t ! "

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    J ust i n case, t hough, he measured some dr ops i nt o a gl ass, and t heunusual l y heal t hy chi l d was f orced t o dr i nk the medi ci ne.

    Suddenl y, Vol ka had an i dea. What i f he coul d pr of i t f r om Hot t abych' sabsence and t ake hi s geogr aphy exami nat i on r i ght t here, i n t he doctor' sof f i ce?

    "By no means! " Pyot r I vanych sai d emphat i cal l y. "By no means. Let t hechi l d have a f ew days of r est . Geogr aphy can wai t . "

    "That ' s qui t e t r ue, " t he t eacher si ghed wi t h r el i ef , pl eased t hat. everyt hi ng had t ur ned out so wel l i n t he end. "And you, my young f r i end,

    r un al ong home and have a good r est . When you f eel bet t er , come back andt ake your exam. I ' m posi t i ve you' l l get an ' A. ' What do you t hi nk, Pyot rI vanych?"

    "Such a Her cul es as he? Why, he' l l never get l ess t han an ' A' +! '"Ah . . . and don' t you t hi nk someone had bet t er see hi m home?" Varvar a

    St epanovna added."Oh no, Var var a St epanovna! " Vol ka cr i ed. "I ' l l make out f i ne. "Al l he needed now was f or a chaper one t o bump i nto t hat cr azy ol d

    Hot t abych!Vol ka appear ed t o be i n t he pi nk of heal t h, and wi t h an easy hear t

    Var vara St epanovna l et hi m go home.The doorman r ushed t owar ds hi m as he was on t he way out . "Kost yl kov!

    Your gr andpa, or whoever he i s, t he one who came here wi t h you. . . . "At t hat ver y moment , ol d man Hot t abych appeared f r om t he wal l . He was

    as happy as a l ar k and i mmensel y pl eased wi t h hi msel f , and he was hummi ng al i t t l e tune.

    "Hel p! " t he door man cr i ed soundl essl y and t r i ed i n vai n t o pour hi msel fanother cup of t ea f r om t he empt y ket t l e. When he put t he ket t l e down andt urned around, bot h Vol ka Kost yl kov and hi s myst er i ous compani on haddi sappeared. By t hen t hey had al r eady t ur ned t he near est corner .

    "Pray t el l me, young mast er , di d you ast ound your t eacher and yourcomr ades wi t h your great knowl edge?" Hot t abych i nqui r ed pr oudl y, breaki ng ar at her l ong si l ence.

    "I ast ounded t hem al l r i ght ! " Vol ka sai d and l ooked at t he ol d man wi t hl oat hi ng.

    Hot t abych beamed. " I expect ed not hi ng el se! But f or a moment t her e It hought t hat t he most revered daught er of St epan was di spl eased wi t h t he

    breadth and scope of your knowl edge. ""Oh, no, no! " Vol ka cri ed i n f ear , r ecal l i ng Hot t abych' s t er r i bl et hr eat s. "You wer e i magi ni ng thi ngs. "

    " I woul d have changed her i nto a choppi ng bl ock on whi ch but cher s chopup mut t on, " t he ol d man sai d f i ercel y ( and Vol ka was r eal l y f r i ght ened f orhi s t eacher ' s f at e) , "i f I hadn' t seen t hat she had such gr eat r espect f oryou and took you to t he door of your cl assr oom and then pr act i cal l y down thest ai r s. I r eal i zed t hen t hat she had f ul l y appr eci at ed your answer s. Peacebe wi t h her! "

    "Sur e, peace be wi t h her ! " Vol ka added hasti l y, f eel i ng t hat a l oad hadf al l en f r om hi s shoul der s.

    Dur i ng t he sever al t housand years of Hot t abych' s l i f e, he had of t en hadt o do wi t h peopl e f eel i ng sad and gl oomy, and he knew how t o cheer t hem up.At any rat e, he was convi nced he knew how t o do so. Al l t hat was needed was

    t o gi ve a person t hat whi ch he had al ways l onged f or . But what ki nd of apresent shoul d he gi ve Vol ka? The answer came t o hi m qui t e by chance whenVol ka asked a passer - by:

    "Woul d you pl ease t el l me what t i me i t i s?"The man l ooked at hi s wat ch and sai d, "Fi ve t o t wo. ""Thank you, " Vol ka sai d and cont i nued on i n si l ence.Hot t abych was t he f i r st t o speak."Tel l me, 0 Vol ka, how was t he man abl e t o t el l t he t i me of day so

    accur atel y?""Di dn' t you see hi m l ook at hi s watch?" The ol d man r ai sed hi s eyebr ows

    i n sur pr i se."Hi s watch?! " "Sur e, hi s watch, " Vol ka expl ai ned. "He had a watch on

    hi s

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    wr i st . The r ound chr ome- pl ated t hi ng. ""Why don' t you have such a watch, 0 most nobl e of al l Geni e- savi our s?"" I ' m t oo young t o have such a wat ch, " Vol ka answered humbl y."May I be per mi t t ed, 0 honour abl e passer - by, t o i nqui r e as t o t he t i me

    of day?" Hot t abych sai d, st oppi ng the f i r st per son he saw and st ar i ng at hi swat ch.

    "Two mi nut es t o t wo, " t he man answered, somewhat sur pr i sed at t hef l owery l anguage.

    Thanki ng hi m i n t he most el aborat e or i ental manner , Hot t abych sai d wi t h

    a sl y gr i n:"May I be per mi t t ed, 0 l ovel i est of al l Vol kas, t o i nqui r e as t o t het i me of day?"

    And t her e was a wat ch shi ni ng on Vol ka' s l ef t wr i st , exact l y l i ke t heone t he man t hey had st opped had, but i nst ead of bei ng chrome- pl at ed, i t wasof t he pur est gol d.

    "May i t be wor t hy of your hand and your ki nd hear t , " Hot t abych sai d i na touched voi ce, baski ng i n Vol ka' s happi ness and surpr i se.

    Then Vol ka di d somet hi ng t hat any ot her boy or gi r l woul d have done i nhi s pl ace, havi ng f ound t hemsel ves t he pr oud possessor s of t hei r f i r stwat ch. He r ai sed hi s ar m t o hi s ear t o hear i t t i ck.

    "O- o- o- o, " he dr awl ed. "I t ' s not wound. I ' l l have t o wi nd i t . " To hi sgreat di sappoi ntment , he f ound he coul d not move t he wi ndi ng but t on. Then hegot out hi s pen- kni f e t o open t he watch case. However , t r y as he woul d, he

    coul d not f i nd a t r ace of a sl i t i n whi ch t o i nser t t he kni f e."I t ' s made of sol i d gol d, " t he ol d man boast ed and wi nked. "I ' m not one

    of t hose peopl e who gi ve pr esent s made of hol l ow gol d. ""Does t hat mean t her e' s nothi ng i nsi de of i t ?" Vol ka asked wi t h

    di sappoi nt ment ."Why, shoul d t her e be anythi ng i nsi de?" t he ol d Geni e i nqui r ed

    anxi ousl y. Vol ka unbuckl ed t he st r ap i n si l ence and r etur ned t he watch t oHot t abych.

    "Al l r i ght , t hen, I ' l l gi ve you a wat ch t hat doesn' t have t o haveanyt hi ng i nsi de. "

    Once agai n a gol d wat ch appeared on Vol ka' s wr i st , but now i t was verysmal l and f l at . Ther e was no gl ass on i t and i nst ead of hands t her e was asmal l ver t i cal gol d r od i n t he mi ddl e. The f ace was st udded wi t h t he most

    exqui si t e emeral ds set wher e t he number s shoul d be."Never bef ore di d anyone, even t he weal t hi est of al l sul t ans, have ahand sun wat ch! " t he ol d man boast ed agai n. " There were sun di al s i n ci t ysquares, i n market pl aces, i n gardens and i n yar ds. And t hey were al l madeof stone. But I j ust i nvent ed t hi s one. I t ' s not bad, i s i t ?"

    I t cer t ai nl y was exci t i ng t o be t he onl y owner of a sun watch i n t hewhol e wor l d.

    Vol ka gr i nned broadl y, whi l e t he ol d man beamed."How do you t el l t he t i me on i t ?" Vol ka asked."Her e' s how, " Hot t abych sai d, t aki ng hol d of Vol ka' s hand gent l y. "Hol d

    your ar m st r ai ght out l i ke t hi s and t he shadow cast by t he l i t t l e gol d r odwi l l f al l on t he r i ght number . "

    "But t he sun has t o be shi ni ng, " Vol ka sai d, l ooki ng wi t h di spl easur eat a smal l cl oud t hat j ust obscur ed i t .

    "The cl oud wi l l pass i n a mi nut e, " Hot t abych pr omi sed. True enough, i na mi nut e t he sun began t o shi ne once agai n. "See, i t poi nt s somewher esbet ween 2 and 3 p. m. That means i t ' s about 2: 30. " As he was speaki ng,another cl oud cover ed t he sun.

    "Don' t pay any at t ent i on t o i t , " Hot t abych sai d. "I ' l l cl ear the skyf or you whenever you want t o f i nd out what t i me i t i s. "

    "What about t he autumn?" Vol ka asked."What about i t ?""What about t he aut umn and t he wi nter , when t he sky i s cover ed wi t h

    cl ouds f or mont hs on end?"" I ' ve al r eady t ol d you, 0 Vol ka, t he sun wi l l shi ne whenever you want

    i t t o. You have but t o or der me and ever ythi ng wi l l be as you wi sh. ""But what i f you' r e not ar ound?"

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    "I ' l l al ways be near - by. Al l you have t o do i s cal l me. ""But what about t he eveni ngs and ni ght s?" Vol ka asked mal i ci ousl y.

    "What about t he ni ght , when t here' s no sun i n t he sky?""At ni ght peopl e must sur r ender t hemsel ves t o sl eep, and not l ook at

    t hei r watches, " Hot t abych snapped. He had t o cont r ol hi msel f not t o t eacht he i nsol ent yout h a good l esson. "Al l r i ght t hen, t el l me whet her you l i ket hat man' s wat ch. I f you do, you shal l have i t . "

    "What do you mean? I t bel ongs t o hi m. Don' t t el l me you ar e goi ngt o. . . . "

    "Don' t wor r y, 0 Vol ka i bn Al yosha. I won' t t ouch a hai r on hi s head.He' l l of f er you t he wat ch hi msel f , f or you ar e cer t ai nl y wor t hy of r ecei vi ngt he most t r easur ed gi f t s. "

    "You' l l f orce hi m t o and t hen he' l l . . . . ""And he' l l be over j oyed t hat I di d not wi pe hi m of f t he f ace of t he

    Ear t h, or change hi m i nt o a f oul r at , or a cockr oach hi di ng i n a cr ack of ahovel , or t he l ast beggar . . . . "

    "That ' s r eal bl ackmai l , " Vol ka sai d angr i l y. " Tr i cks l i ke t hat send aman t o j ai l , my f r i end. And you' l l wel l deser ve i t . "

    "Send me t o j ai l ?! " t he ol d man f l ared up. " Me?! Hassan Abdurr akhmani bn Hot t ab? And does he know, t hat most despi cabl e of al l passers- by, who Jam? Ask t he f i r st Geni e, or I f r i t , or Shai t an you see, and t hey' l l t el l you,as they t r embl e f r om f ear , t hat Hassan Abdur r akhman i bn Hot t ab i s t he chi efof al l Geni e bodyguards. My army consi st s of 72 t r i bes, wi t h 72, 000 war r i ors

    i n each t r i be; ever y war r i or r ul es over one t housand Mari ds and ever y Mari dr ul es over a t housand Ai des and every Ai de r ul es over a t housand Shai t ansand ever y Shai t an r ul es over a t housand Geni es. I r ul e over t hemal l andnone can di sobey me! I f onl y t hi s t hr i ce- mi ser abl e of al l most mi ser abl epasser s-by t r i es to. . . . "

    Meanwhi l e, t he man i n quest i on was st r ol l i ng down t he st r eet , gl anci ngat t he shop wi ndows, and i n no way aware of t he t er r i bl e danger hangi ng overhi m because of an or di nar y wat ch gl i t t er i ng on hi s wr i st .

    ' "Why, I ' l l . . . " Hot t abych r aged on i n hi s boast f ul ness, " why, i f youonl y so desi r e, I ' l l t urn hi m i nto a. . . . "

    Each second counted. Vol ka shout ed:"Don' t ! ""Don' t what ?"

    "Don' t t ouch that man! I don' t need a watch! I don' t need anythi ng! ""Nothi ng at al l ?" t he ol d man asked doubt f ul l y, qui ckl y cal mi ng down.The onl y sun wat ch i n t he wor l d di sappear ed as qui ckl y as i t had appear ed.

    "Nothi ng at al l , " sai d Vol ka. He heaved such a si gh t hat Hot t abychr eal i zed he must appl y hi msel f t o cheer i ng up hi s young savi our anddi spel l i ng hi s gl oomy t hought s.

    HOTTABYCH' S SECOND SERVI CE

    Vol ka was i n t he dumps. Hot t abych sensed t hat somet hi ng was wr ong. Henever dreamed he had done t he boy such a bad t urn dur i ng t he exam, but i twas al l t oo cl ear t hat Vol ka was upset . And t he one t o bl ame, apparent l y,was none ot her t han hi msel f , Hassan Abdur r akhman i bn Hot t ab.

    "Woul d you, 0 moon- l i ke, f eel i ncl i ned t o l i st en t o st or i es of most

    unusual and st r ange advent ur es?" he asked sl yl y. "For i nst ance, do you knowt he st ory of t he Baghdad barber ' s t hree bl ack r oost ers and hi s l ame son? Ort he one about t he copper camel wi t h a si l ver hump? Or about t hewater - carr i er Ahmet and hi s magi c pai l ?"

    Vol ka kept on f r owni ng. Thi s di d not st op t he ol d man, and he beganhur r i edl y:

    "Be i t known t o you, 0 most wonder f ul of al l secondary school pupi l s,t hat once upon a t i me i n Baghdad t here l i ved a ski l l ed bar ber named Sel i mwho had t hree r oost er s and a l ame son named Tub. I t so happened t hat Cal i phHarun al Rashi d once passed hi s shop. But , 0 most at t ent i ve of al l yout hs, Isuggest we si t down on t hi s bench i n order t hat your young l egs don' t t i r edur i ng thi s l ong and most educat i onal st or y. "

    Vol ka agr eed. They sat down i n t he shade of an ol d l i nden t r ee.

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    For t hr ee l ong hour s Hot t abych went on and on wi t h t he t r ul yi nt er est i ng st or y. He f i nal l y ended i t wi t h t hese cr af t y wor ds:

    "But mor e marvel l ous st i l l i s t he st or y of t he copper camel wi t h asi l ver hump, " and i mmedi at el y proceeded wi t h i t . When he came t o t he par t :"Then t he st r anger t ook a pi ece of coal f r omt he br azi er and dr ew t heout l i ne of a camel on t he wal l . The camel waved i t s tai l , nodded i t s head,wal ked of f t he wal l and ont o t he cobbl estones. . . "- he st opped t o enj oy t hei mpr essi on hi s st ory of a dr awi ng comi ng t o l i f e had made on hi s youngl i s tener .

    But Hot t abych was i n f or some di sappoi ntment , because Vol ka had seenenough car t oons i n hi s l i f e. However , t he ol d man' s words gave hi m an i dea."You know what ? Let ' s go t o t he movi es. You can f i ni sh t he st ory

    af ter . ""Your ever y wor d i s my command, 0 Vol ka i bn Al yosha, " t he ol d man

    r epl i ed obedi ent l y. "But do me a f avour and t el l me what you mean by ' t hemovi es' ? I s i t a bat h- house? Or , per haps, t hat ' s what you cal l t hemarket - pl ace, wher e one can st r ol l and chat wi t h f r i ends and acquai nt ances?"

    "Wel l ! Any chi l d can t el l you what a movi e i s. I t ' s a. . . . " At t hi s,Vol ka waved hi s hands around vaguel y and added, "Wel l , anyway, you' l l seewhen we get t her e. "

    Over t he Satur n Theat r e box- of f i ce was a si gn that r ead:

    "Chi l dren under si xt een not admi t t ed t o eveni ng per f ormances. "

    "What ' s t he mat t er , 0 most handsome of al l handsome yout hs?" Hot t abychi nqui r ed anxi ousl y, not i ci ng t hat Vol ka had become gl oomy agai n.

    "Not hi ng much. I t ' s j ust t hat we' r e l at e f or t he l ast day- t i meper f ormance! You have t o be si xt een t o get i n now. I r eal l y don' t know whatt o do, ' cause I don' t f eel l i ke goi ng home. "

    "You won' t go home! " Hot t abych cr i ed. " I n a twi nkl i ng of an eye t hey' l ll et us t hr ough, sur r ounded by t he r espect your t r ul y endl ess capabi l i t i escommand! I ' l l j ust have a peek at t hose bi t s of paper ever yone' s handi ngt hat st er n- l ooki ng woman at t he ent r ance. "

    "That ol d br aggar t ! " Vol ka t hought i r r i t abl y. Suddenl y, he f el t t wot i cket s i n hi s r i ght f i s t .

    "Come! " Hot t abych cal l ed, beami ng agai n. "Come, t hey' l l l et you thr ough

    now! ""Ar e you sure?""J ust as posi t i ve as t hat a gr eat f ut ur e awai t s you! "He nudged Vol ka t owar ds a mi r r or hangi ng near by. A boy wi t h a bushy

    bl ond bear d on hi s heal t hy f r eckl ed f ace l ooked back f r omt he mi r r or at ashocked and gapi ng Vol ka.

    AN UNUSUAL EVENT AT THE MOVI ES

    A t r i umphant Hot t abych dr agged Vol ka up t he st ai r s to t he second- f l oorf oyer . At t he ent r ance to t he pr oj ect i on r oom st ood Zhenya Bogorad, t he envyof ever y pupi l of 6B. Thi s dar l i ng of f ate was t he t heat r e manager ' s nephewand t her ef ore permi t t ed t o at t end eveni ng per f ormances. But t oday, i nst eadof bei ng t he happi est of boys, he was suf f er i ng t er r i bl y. He was suf f er i ngf r om l onel i ness. He was dyi ng t o have a compani on, someone he coul d t al k t oabout Vol ka Kost yl kov' s behavi our at t he morni ng' s geography exami nat i on.Al as! Ther e was not a f ami l i ar f ace i n si ght .

    He t hen deci ded t o go downst ai r s, i n t he hope t hat Luck woul d send hi msomeone. At t he l andi ng he was near l y knocked of f hi s f eet by an ol d man i na whi t e sui t and embroi der ed morocco sl i ppers who was draggi ng al ong- whom doyou t hi nk?- Vol ka Kost yl kov, i n person! For r easons unknown, Vol ka wascover i ng hi s f ace wi t h hi s hands.

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    "Vol ka! " Bogorad shout ed happi l y. "Kostyl kov! "Unl i ke Zhenya, Vol ka di d not seem at al l pl eased at t he encount er . I n

    f act , he even pr et ended not t o have r ecogni zed hi s best f r i end. He dart edi nt o t he t hi ck of t he cr owd whi ch st ood l i st eni ng t o an or chest r a whi l eawai t i ng the next showi ng.

    "Don' t t hi nk I care! " Zhenya sai d i n an of f ended t one and went of f t obuy an i ce- cr eam.

    That i s why he di dn' t see t he peopl e gat her i ng r ound t he st r ange ol dman and Vol ka. Lat er , when he t r i ed t o push hi s way t hrough t o t he spot

    whi ch was at t r act i ng so many eager eyes, hi s f r i end was al r eady sur r oundedby a r api dl y- gr owi ng cr owd. He coul d hear t he f ol di ng seats hi t t i ng agai nstt he backs of t he chai r s as t hose who were l i st eni ng t o t he orchest r a r ushedof f . Soon t he musi ci ans were pl ayi ng t o rows of empt y seats.

    "What happened?" Zhenya asked, vai nl y t r yi ng t o el bow hi s way t hrough." I f t her e' s been an acci dent , I can phone f or hel p. My uncl e' s the managerhere. What ' s t he mat t er?"

    But no one seemed to know what t he mat t er was. And, si nce har dl y anyonecoul d see anythi ng and ever yone want ed t o know what was goi ng on i nsi de t heci r cl e, t hey al l kept aski ng each other quest i ons and demandi ng sensi bl eanswers, unt i l t hey r ai sed such a r uckus t hey began t o dr own out t he musi c,t hough the musi ci ans were pl ayi ng as l oud as t hey coul d.

    Zhenya' s uncl e f i nal l y appeared, cl i mbed on a chai r and shout ed,"Everyone pl ease di sper se! What ' s t he mat t er? Haven' t you ever seen a

    bear ded chi l d bef ore?"The moment t hese wor ds r eached t he snack bar , everyone t here r ushed t o

    see t he bear ded chi l d."Vol ka! " Zhenya yel l ed at t he t op of hi s voi ce, despai r i ng of ever

    get t i ng t hrough t he cr owd. " I can' t see anyt hi ng! Can you see? Does he havea bi g bear d?"

    "Gol l y!" t he unf or t unat e Vol ka wai l ed. "What i f he. . . . ""Poor chi l d! " t he cur i ous onl ooker s si ghed."What a pi t y! ""I s sci ence hel pl ess i n hi s case?"At f i r st , Hot t abych mi sunders t ood t he at t ent i on hi s young f r i end was

    at t r act i ng. He t hought t he peopl e were cr owdi ng r ound t o expr ess t hei rr espect f or Vol ka. Then he began t o get angr y.

    "Di sper se, my good peopl e! " he shouted, dr owni ng out t he noi se of t hecr owd and t he band. "Di sper se, or I ' l l do somet hi ng t er r i bl e t o al l of you! "A t i mi d gi r l gasped f r om f ear, but t he other s onl y l aughed. Real l y now,

    what was t her e t o f ear f r om such a f unny ol d man i n si l l y pi nk sl i pper s?Why, i f someone as much as t ouched hi m, he' d pr obabl y f al l t o pi eces!

    No, no one t ook hi s t hr eat s ser i ousl y. However , t he ol d man was used t ohavi ng peopl e t r embl e at hi s words. He f el t t hat he and Vol ka were bei ngi nsul t ed and was becomi ng mor e and more enr aged. There i s no t el l i ng how i tal l coul d have ended, i f t he f i r st bel l had not r ung j ust t hen.

    The door s t o t he pr oj ect i on r oom wer e t hrown open and everyone r ushedt o t ake thei r seat s. Zhenya t hought t hi s was hi s chance to get a peek at t hewei r d boy. But t he same cr owd t hat had bl ocked hi s vi ew now caught hi m upand car r i ed hi m i nt o t he pr oj ect i on r oom.

    No sooner had he f ound a seat i n t he f i r st r ow t han t he l i ght s went

    out ."Whew! " Zhenya br eat hed. "J ust i n t i me. I ' l l st i l l be abl e t o see t he

    bear ded boy on t he way out . " Nonet hel ess, he kept f i dget i ng i n hi s seat ,t r yi ng to cat ch a gl i mpse of t he f r eak who was si t t i ng somewhere behi nd hi m.

    "Stop f i dget i ng! You' r e bot her i ng us! " t he man next t o hi m sai d. "Si tst i l l ! " However , t o hi s ut t er amazement , t he f i dget y boy suddenl ydi sappear ed.

    Vol ka and Hot t abych wer e t he l ast t o ent er t he darkened pr oj ect i onr oom. To t el l t he t r ut h, Vol ka was so upset he was r eady t o l eave wi t houtseei ng t he f i l m.

    Hot t abych pl eaded:"I f you' r e so di spl eased wi t h t he bear d I t hought you' d appr eci at e,

    I ' l l f r ee you of i t t he moment we f i nd our seat s. That ' s easy enough. Let ' s

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    f ol l ow t he ot her s i n, f or I ' m i mpat i ent to di scover what a ' movi e' i s. I tmust i ndeed be somet hi ng wonder f ul , i f even grown men at t end i t on such ahot summer day! "

    When t hey were seat ed, Hot t abych snapped t he f i ngers of hi s l ef t hand.Cont r ary t o hi s pr omi ses, nothi ng happened t o Vol ka' s beard.

    "Why i s i t t aki ng you so l ong? Remember how you boast ed! ""I wasn' t boast i ng, 0 most wonder f ul of 6B pupi l s. For t unat el y, I

    changed my mi nd i n t i me. I f you don' t have a bear d, you' l l be t ur ned out oft he movi e whi ch i s so dear t o your heart . "

    I t soon became cl ear t hat t hi s was merel y a cunni ng excuse. Vol ka wasnot yet aware of t he ol d man' s cr af t i ness."That ' s al l r i ght , t hey won' t t ur n me out of her e, " he sai d.Hot t abych pret ended not t o have hear d hi m. Vol ka r epeat ed hi s wor ds.

    Once agai n, Hot t abych pl ayed deaf . Then Vol ka r ai sed hi s voi ce:"Hassan Abdur r akhman i bn Hot t ab!"" I ' m l i st eni ng, 0 my young master, " t he ol d man answer ed obedi ent l y."Sh- h- h!" someone hi ssed.Vol ka cont i nued i n a whi sper , bendi ng cl ose t o hi s f r i end who suddenl y

    l ooked ver y sad."Do somethi ng t o make t hi s s t upi d bear d di sappear i mmedi atel y! ""I t ' s not a bi t st upi d, " t he ol d man whi sper ed back. "I t i s a most

    grand and nobl e bear d. ""Thi s very second! Do you hear ? Thi s very second!"

    " I hear and I obey, " Hot t abych mut t ered and began whi sper i ng agai n,snappi ng hi s f i nger s.

    The hai r y growt h on Vol ka' s f ace r emai ned unchanged."Wel l ?""One moment , 0 most bl essed Vol ka i bn Al yosha, " t he ol d man r epl i ed,

    st i l l whi sper i ng and snappi ng hi s f i nger s ner vousl y.The beard on Vol ka' s chi n r emai ned where i t was."Look! Look who' s si t t i ng i n t he ni nt h r ow! " Vol ka whi sper ed,

    f orget t i ng hi s great mi sf ort une f or t he moment .As f ar as Hot t abych coul d see, t he t wo men i n the ni nt h row appeared i n

    no way r emar kabl e."They' r e f amous act ors , " Vol ka expl ai ned and t ol d Hot t abych t hei r

    names, whi ch, t hough t hey wer e ver y wel l known, meant nothi ng t o hi m.

    "Do you mean t hey' r e per f or mers?" t he ol d man asked condescendi ngl y."Ar e t hey t i ght - r ope wal ker s?""They' r e movi e act ors! They' r e t he most f amous movi e act ors, t hat ' s who

    t hey ar e! ""Then why aren' t t hey doi ng anyt hi ng? Why are t hey si t t i ng back doi ng

    nothi ng?" Hot t abych demanded cr i t i cal l y. "They' r e pr obabl y ver y l azyperf ormer s. I t pai ns me t o see you pr ai si ng t hem so t hought l essl y, 0 movi eof my hear t . "

    "Ha, ha!" Vol ka l aughed. " Movi e actors never act i n a t heatr e. Movi eactors act i n st udi os. "

    "Does that mean we ar e goi ng t o see some ot her s, and not movi e act or s,per f or m?"

    "No, we' l l see movi e actors. Don' t you under st and, t hey act i n ast udi o, but we see t hei r act i ng her e, i n a t heatr e. Why, any chi l d knows

    t hat . ""Pr ay f or gi ve me, but what you' r e sayi ng i s a l ot of nonsense, "

    Hot t abych r epr oached hi m st er nl y. " However , I ' m not angr y at you, because Idon' t t hi nk you meant t o pl ay a t r i ck on your most obedi ent servant . Youseem t o be af f ect ed by t he heat i n t hi s bui l di ng. Unf or t unat el y, I don' t seea si ngl e wi ndow whi ch coul d be opened t o l et i n some f r esh ai r . "

    Vol ka r eal i zed t hat i n t he f ew r emai ni ng mi nut es bef ore t he begi nni ngof t he f i l m he woul d never be abl e t o expl ai n a movi e act or ' s wor k t o t heol d man. He deci ded t o put of f al l expl anat i ons t i l l l at er , and especi al l ysi nce he suddenl y r ecal l ed hi s t er r i bl e mi sf or t une.

    "Dear , dear Hot t abych, i t ' s real l y no t r oubl e t o you- pl ease, can' t youdo somethi ng r i ght now?"

    The ol d man heaved a si gh, yanked a hai r f r om hi s beard, t hen a second,

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    and a t hi r d, and, f i nal l y, i n gr eat anger , a whol e bunch t oget her . He begant ear i ng t hem t o bi t s savagel y, mut t er i ng somet hi ng wi t h hi s eyes f i xed onVol ka' s f ace. There was no change what soever . Then Hot t abych began snappi nghi s f i nger s i n t he most var i ed combi nat i ons: f i r st t wo f i nger s at a t i me,t hen al l f i ve f i nger s of t he r i ght hand, t hen t he l ef t hand, t hen al l t enf i nger s t oget her , t hen once wi t h t he r i ght and t wi ce wi t h t he l ef t , t hen t heot her way r ound- but al l to no avai l . Fi nal l y, he began r i ppi ng of f hi scl ot hes.

    "Ar e you mad?" Vol ka cr i ed. "What ' r e you doi ng?"

    "Woe i s me!" Hot t abych r epl i ed i n a whi sper and began scr atchi ng hi sf ace. "Woe i s me! The cent ur i es I spent i n t hat accur sed vesselhave- al as! - l ef t t hei r mar k! A l ack of pract i ce has been ext r emel ydet r i ment al t o my pr of essi on. For gi ve me, 0 my young savi our , but I can donothi ng wi t h your bear d! 0 woe i s me, poor Geni e Hassan Abdur r akhman i bnHot t ab t hat I am! "

    "What ar e you whi speri ng?" Vol ka asked. " Say i t l ouder , I can' t makeout a word. "

    And Hott abych r epl i ed, t ear i ng at hi s cl ot hes:"0 most t r easur ed of yout hs, 0 most pl easi ng of al l , do not vent your

    r i ght f ul anger upon me! I cannot r i d you of your beard! I f orgot how t o doi t ! "

    "Have a hear t ! " someone hi ssed. "You' l l t al k i t al l over at home.You' r e bot her i ng us. Do you want me t o cal l t he usher ?"

    "Such di sgr ace has f al l en upon my ol d head! " Hot t abych whi mper ed. "Tof orget such si mpl e magi c! And who i s i t t hat f orgot i t ? Me, HassanAbdurr akhman i bn Hot t ab, t he most power f ul of al l Geni es- me, t he ver y sameHassan Abdur r akhman i bn Hot t ab whom even Sul ayman son of Davi d ( on the twai nbe peace!) coul d not subdue f or t went y years! "

    "St op whi ni ng! " Vol ka whi sper ed wi t h unconceal ed scorn. "Tel l mehonest l y: how much l onger wi l l I have t o go ar ound wi t h t hi s bear d?"

    "Oh, cal m your f ears, my young mast er ! Lucki l y, I onl y used smal lmagi c. I n t wo days your f ace wi l l be as smoot h as that of a new- born babe.Per haps I ' l l even remember how t o br eak smal l magi c spel l s bef ore t hat . "

    J ust t hen, t he many cr edi t s whi ch usual l y precede a f i l m f l ashed of ft he scr een and were r epl aced by peopl e who moved and spoke. Hot t abychwhi sper ed smugl y:

    "Hm! Thi s i s al l qui t e cl ear. And ver y si mpl e. Al l t hese peopl e haveappear ed t hr ough t he wal l . You can' t sur pr i se me wi t h t hat sor t of st uf f . Ican do t hat mysel f . "

    "You don' t unders t and a t hi ng, " Vol ka sai d wi t h a smi l e, upon heari ngsuch nonsense. " I f you r eal l y want t o know, f i l ms are based on t hepr i nci pl e. . . . "

    There was hi ssi ng f r om al l si des now, and Vol ka' s expl anat i ons wer e cutshor t . For a moment Hot t abych seemed ent r anced. Then he began squi r mi ngnervousl y, t ur ni ng r ound ever so of t en t o l ook at t he ni nt h r ow and t he t womovi e act ors si t t i ng t her e. He became convi nced t hat t hey wer e si t t i ngqui et l y behi nd hi m and, at t he same t i me, gal l opi ng at t op speed i n f r ont ofhi m on t he onl y l i ght ed wal l i n t hi s most myst er i ous bui l di ng.

    He became pal e wi t h f ear . He r ai sed hi s eyebrows and whi spered, "Lookbehi nd us, 0 f ear l ess Vol ka i bn Al yosha! "

    "Sur e, t hose are t he actor s. They pl ay t he l eads and have come t o seehow t he audi ence l i kes t hei r act i ng. "

    "I don' t l i ke i t ! " Hot t abych i nf or med hi m qui ckl y. "I don' t l i ke peopl et o spl i t i n t wo. Even I don' t know how t o si t i n a chai r wi t h my ar ms f ol dedand gal l op away as f ast as t he wi nd- and al l at one and t he same t i me! EvenSul ayman, son of Davi d ( on t he t wai n be peace! ) , coul d not do such a t hi ng.And t hat ' s why I ' m f r i ght ened. "

    "Ther e' s not hi ng t o wor r y about , " Vol ka sai d pat r oni zi ngl y. "Look atever yone el se. See? No one' s af r ai d. I ' l l expl ai n what i t ' s al l aboutl at er . "

    Suddenl y, t he mi ght y r oar of a l ocomoti ve cut t hr ough t he st i l l ness.Hot t abych gr abbed Vol ka' s ar m.

    "0 r oyal Vol ka! " he whi sper ed, br eaki ng out i n a col d sweat . " I

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    r ecogni ze t hat voi ce. I t ' s t he voi ce of J i r j i s , t he r ul er of al l Geni es!Let ' s f l ee bef ore i t ' s too l at e!"

    "What nonsense! Si t st i l l ! Not hi ng' s t hr eat eni ng us. "" I hear and I obey, " Hot t abych mumbl ed obedi ent l y, t hough he cont i nued

    t o t r embl e.But a spl i t - second l at er , when a t hunder i ng l ocomot i ve seemed t o be

    r ushi ng of f t he screen and r i ght i nt o t he audi ence, a scream of t er r or r entt he pr oj ect i on r oom.

    "Let ' s f l ee! Let ' s f l ee! " Hot t abych shr i eked as he dashed of f .

    At t he exi t he r emembered about Vol ka and i n sever al l eaps r eturned,gr abbed hi m by t he arm, and dr agged hi m t o t he door ."Let ' s f l ee, 0 Vol ka i bn Al yosha! Let ' s f l ee bef or e i t ' s t oo l at e! ""Now, wai t a mi nut e. . . " t he usher began, appear i ng i n f r ont of t hem.

    However , she i mmedi atel y di d a l ong, gr acef ul l oop i n t he ai r and l anded ont he st age i n f r ont of t he scr een.

    "What were you scr eechi ng about ? What was al l t he pani c about ?" Vol kaasked angr i l y when t hey were out i n t he st r eet agai n.

    "How can I hel p shout i ng when t he most t err i f yi ng of al l danger s wast hr eat eni ng you! The gr eat J i r j i s, son of Rej mus, gr andson of t he Aunt ofI krash, was headi ng st r ai ght f or us, spi t t i ng f i r e and deat h! "

    "What J i r j i s? Whi ch aunt ? I t was j ust an or di nar y l ocomoti ve! ""Has my young mast er deci ded t o t each hi s ol d Geni e Hassan Abdur r akhman

    i bn Hot t ab what a Shai t an i s?" Hot t abych asked aci dl y.

    Vol ka r eal i zed t hat i t woul d t ake much more t han f i ve mi nut es and muchmor e than an hour t o t el l hi m what a movi e and a l ocomot i ve were.

    Af t er Hot t abych r ecover ed hi s breat h, he asked mi l dl y, "What woul d youdesi r e now, 0 t r easur ed appl e of my eye?"

    "As i f you di dn' t know. I want t o get r i d of my beard!""Al as, " t he ol d man si ghed, "I am as yet hel pl ess t o f ul f i l your wi sh.

    But per haps you' d l i ke somet hi ng el se i nst ead? J ust t el l me, and you' l l havei t i n a f l ash. "

    "I ' d l i ke t o have a shave. And as qui ckl y as possi bl e. " A f ew mi nut esl ater t hey ent er ed a bar ber shop. Ten mi nut es l ater a t i r ed bar ber st uck hi shead i nt o t he wai t i ng r oom and shout ed:

    "Next! "Then, f r om a cor ner near t he coat - r ack, r ose a boy whose f ace was

    wr apped i n an expensi ve si l k scar f . He hur r i edl y sat down i n t he barber ' schai r ."You want a hai r - cut ?" t he barber asked. "No, a shave! " t he boy

    answered i n a hol l ow voi ce and r emoved t he scar f t hat had cover ed most ofhi s f ace.

    A TROUBLED EVENI NG

    I t was a good t hi ng Vol ka di dn' t have dark hai r . Zhenya Bogorad, f ori nst ance, woul d cer t ai nl y have had a bl ue shadow on hi s cheeks af t er havi ngbeen shaved, but Vol ka' s cheeks af t er he l ef t t he bar bershop were nodi f f er ent f r om t hose of hi s f r i ends. I t was af t er seven, but i t was st i l ll i ght out door s and ver y hot . "I s t her e any pl ace i n your bl essed ci t y wher et hey sel l sher bets or col d dr i nks l i ke sher bet and where we coul d quench ourt hi r st ?" Hot t abych asked.

    "Why, t hat ' s an i dea! A gl ass of col d l emonade woul d r eal l y be gr and. "Ent er i ng t he f i r st j ui ce and mi ner al water shop t hey saw, t hey t ook a

    t abl e."We' d l i ke t wo bott l es of l emonade, pl ease, " Vol ka sai d. The wai t r ess

    nodded and headed t owards t he count er . Hot t abych cal l ed her back angr i l y."You come r i ght back, unwor t hy servant ! I don' t l i ke t he way you

    r esponded t o the order s of my young f r i end and mast er . "

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    "Hot t abych, st op i t ! Do you hear ! St op. . . " Vol ka began t o whi sper .But Hot t abych cover ed t he boy' s mout h gent l y wi t h hi s hand."At l east don' t i nt er f er e when I def end your honour , si nce your ki nd

    hear t pr event s you f r om scol di ng her your sel f . ""You don' t unders t and, " Vol ka pr otest ed. He was r eal l y becomi ng

    f r i ght ened. "Hot t abych, can' t you see. . . . "Suddenl y, he f r oze, f or he f el t he had l ost t he gi f t of speech. He

    want ed t o t hrow hi msel f between t he ol d man and t he st i l l unsuspect i ngwai t r ess, but f ound he coul d not move a f i nger .

    I t was al l Hot t abych' s doi ng. To pr event Vol ka f r om i nt er f er i ng i nsomethi ng he consi dered a mat t er of honour , he had l i ght l y pi nched hi s earl obe bet ween t he f i r st t wo f i ngers of hi s l ef t hand and had t hus condemnedt he boy t o si l ence and i mmobi l i t y.

    "How di d you repl y t o t he or der my young mast er gave you?" he r epeated."I ' m af r ai d I don' t under st and you, " t he wai t r ess answer ed pol i t el y.

    "I t was not an or der , i t was a r equest , and I went t o f ul f i l i t . And, i n t hesecond pl ace, i t ' s cust omar y t o speak pol i t el y t o st r anger s. Al l I can sayi s t hat I ' m sur pr i sed you don' t know such a t hi ng, t hough ever y cul t ur edperson shoul d. "

    "Don' t t el l me you want t o t each me manner s! " Hot t abych shout ed. "Onyour knees, or I ' l l t ur n you t o dust ! "

    "Shame on you! " t he cashi er sai d. She was t he onl y wi t ness of t hedi sgr acef ul scene, f or t her e was no one besi des Vol ka and Hot t abych i n t he

    caf e. "How can you be so r ude? And especi al l y a per son your age! ""On your knees! " Hot t abych r oared. " And you get down on your knees,

    t oo, " he added, poi nt i ng t o t he cashi er. "And you! " he shout ed t o anotherwai t r ess who was rushi ng t o t he r escue. "Al l t hree of you, get down on yourknees i mmedi at el y, and beg my young f r i end' s pardon! " At t hi s, Hot t abychsuddenl y began t o gr ow bi gger and bi gger unt i l f i nal l y hi s head t ouched t hecei l i ng. I t was a st r ange and t er r i bl e si ght . The cashi er and t he secondwai t r ess bot h f ai nt ed, but t he f i r st wai t r ess onl y pal ed and sai d cal ml y,"Shame on you! You shoul d behave pr oper l y i n publ i c. And i f you' r e a decentsort of hypnot i st . . . "

    ( She t hought t he ol d man was pr act i si ng hypnot i c t r i cks on t hem. )"On your knees! " Hot t abych bel l owed. "Di dn' t you hear me- on your

    knees?! "

    I n al l hi s t hr ee t housand seven hundr ed and t hi r t y- t wo years , t hi s wast he f i r st t i me ordi nar y mor t al s had r ef used t o obey hi m. Hot t abych f el t t heboy woul d l ose r espect f or hi m, and he was t er r i bl y anxi ous t o have Vol kar espect hi m and t r easur e hi s f r i endshi p.

    "Down, 0 despi cabl e one, i f you val ue your l i f e! ""That ' s ent i r el y out of t he quest i on, " t he br ave wai t r ess answer ed i n a

    t r embl i ng voi ce. "I can' t under st and why you' r e r ai si ng your voi ce. I f yout hi nk somet hi ng' s wr ong, you can ask t he cashi er f or t he ' Compl ai nt s andSuggest i ons Book. ' Anyone can have i t . And I ' d l i ke t o add t hat the mostf amous hypnot i st s and mesmer i st s vi si t our caf e, but none have ever behavedl i ke you. Ar en' t I r i ght , Kat ya?" she sai d, t ur ni ng t o her f r i end who had byt hen come t o.

    "How d' you l i ke t hat ! " Kat ya sni f f l ed. "He want s us t o get down on ourknees! I t ' s out r ageous! "

    "I s t hat so?! " Hot t abych yel l ed, l osi ng hi s t emper compl et el y. "I s t hathow i nsol ent you ar e? Wel l , you have onl y your sel ves t o bl ame!"

    Wi t h a pr act i sed gest ur e he yanked t hr ee hai r s f r om hi s beard and l etgo of Vol ka' s ear t o t ear them t o bi t s. To t he ol d man' s annoyance, Vol kar egai ned hi s power of speech and t he f r eedomt o move hi s l i mbs at wi l l t hemoment he l et go. The f i r st t hi ng he di d was t o gr ab Hot t abych' s hand andcry:

    "Oh, no, Hot t abych! What do you want t o do?"" I want t o puni sh t hem, 0 Vol ka. I ' m ashamed t o admi t I was about t o

    st r i ke t hem down wi t h t hunder . Somet hi ng even t he most wor t hl ess I f r i t cando!"

    Despi t e t he gr avi t y of t he si t uat i on, Vol ka f el t he had t o st and up f orsci ence.

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    "A cl ap of t hunder cannot ki l l anyone, " he sai d, t hi nki ng f ever i shl y ofhow t o ward of f t he danger now hangi ng over t he poor wai t r esses. "What ki l l speopl e i s l i ght ni ng- a char ge of at mospher i c el ect r i ci t y. Thunder i shar ml ess, i t ' s onl y a sound. "

    " I woul dn' t be so sur e, " Hot t abych answered dr yl y, not wi shi ng t o l owerhi msel f t o an argument wi t h such an i nexper i enced yout h. " I don' t t hi nkyou' r e r i ght . But I ' ve changed my mi nd. I won' t st r i ke t hem wi t h t hunder ,I ' l l change t hem i nt o spar r ows i nst ead. Yes, t hat ' s t he best t hi ng t o do. "

    "But why?"

    " I must puni sh t hem, 0 Vol ka. Evi l must al ways be puni shed. ""There' s no r eason t o puni sh t hem! Do you hear ! "Vol ka tugged at Hot t abych' s hand, f or t he ol d man was about t o t ear t he

    hai r s, and t hen i t woul d r eal l y be t oo l at e. But the hai r s whi ch he hadknocked out of hi s hand mi r acul ousl y r eturned t o Hot t abych' s r ough darkpal m.

    " J ust you t r y! " Vol ka shout ed, seei ng t hat t he ol d man was about t ot ear t hem anyway. "You can t ur n me i nt o a spar r ow, t oo! Or i nt o a t oad! Ori nt o anythi ng you want ! And you can consi der our f r i endshi p di ssol ved as oft hi s mi nut e. I don' t l i ke your ways, that ' s what. Go on, t ur n me i nt o aspar r ow! And I hope t he f i r st cat t hat sees me gobbl es me up! "

    The ol d man was di smayed."Can' t you see, I ' m onl y doi ng t hi s t o pr event anyone f r om ever

    appr oachi ng you wi t hout t he gr eat r espect your endl ess mer i t s cal l f or?"

    "No, I can' t , and I don' t want t o! ""Your ever y wor d i s my command, " Hot t abych r epl i ed obedi ent l y,

    si ncer el y puzzl ed at hi s savi our ' s st r ange sof t hear t edness. "Al l r i ght ,t hen. I won' t t ur n t hem i nt o spar r ows. "

    "Nor i nt o anythi ng el se! ""Nor i nt o anyt hi ng el se, " t he ol d man agr eed meekl y. However , he

    gather ed up t he hai r s wi t h t he obvi ous i nt ent i on of t eari ng t hem t o bi t s."Why do you want t o t ear t hem?" Vol ka cri ed. ; "I ' l l t ur n al l t he

    goods, al l t he t abl es and al l t he equi pment of t hi s despi cabl e shop i nt odust!"

    "You' r e mad! " Vol ka sai d, r eal l y angr y by now. "Don' t you know t hat ' sgover nment proper t y, you dope! "

    "And may I i nqui r e, 0 di amond of my soul , what you mean by t he st r ange

    word ' dope' ?" Hot t abych asked.Vol ka tur ned as r ed as a beet ."Wel l you see. . . What I mean i s. . . . Uh. . . . Wel l , anyway, ' dope' i s a

    sor t of wi se man. "Hot t abych deci ded t o r emember t he word, i n or der t o use i t i n some

    f ut ur e conver sati on."But . . . " he began."No but s! I ' l l count t o t hr ee. I f , af t er I say ' t hr ee, ' you don' t l eave

    t hi s caf e al one, we' l l cal l of f our f r i endshi p and. . . I ' m count i ng: one!two! th. . . . "

    Vol ka di d not f i ni sh. Shr uggi ng sadl y, t he ol d man r esumed hi s usualappearance and mut t er ed i n a gl oomy voi ce:

    "Al l r i ght , have i t your way. Your good gr aces are more pr eci ous t o met han t he pupi l s of my eyes. "

    "Wel l , t her e you are! Now al l you have to do i s t o apol ogi ze and we canl eave. "

    "You shoul d be f orever gr atef ul t o your young savi our , " Hot t abychshout ed st er nl y t o the wai t r esses, and Vol ka r eal i zed he woul d never be abl et o pr y an apol ogy f r omt he ol d man' s l i ps.

    "Pl ease excuse us, " he sai d. " And I wi sh you woul dn' t be t oo angry att hi s ol d man. He' s a f orei gner and doesn' t know our ways yet . Good- bye! "

    "Good- bye, " t he wai t r esses answer ed pol i t el y.They wer e st i l l r at her upset and wer e bot h puzzl ed and f r i ghtened. But ,

    of cour se, t hey never dreamed how great a danger t hey had avoi ded. Theyf ol l owed Hot t abych and Vol ka out and wat ched t he cur i ous ol d man i n ananci ent st r aw boat er go down the st r eet and di sappear around t he corner .

    " I can' t i magi ne wher e such naughty ol d men come f r om, " Kat ya si ghed

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    and wi ped a t ear ."I suppose he' s an ol d- t i me hypnot i st , " her brave f r i end sai d

    compassi onatel y. "He' s pr obabl y a pensi oner . Maybe he' s j ust l onel y. ""I t ' s no f un t o be ol d, " t he cashi er j oi ned i n. "Come on back i n,

    gi r l s. "The day' s mi schi ef was not t o end t here. As Hot t abych and Vol ka r eached

    Gorky St r eet , t hey wer e bl i nded by an aut omobi l e' s headl i ght s. A l argeambul ance, i t s screami ng si r en pi er ci ng t he cal m of t wi l i ght , seemed t o ber ushi ng st r ai ght at t hem.

    Hot t abych changed col our and wai l ed l oudl y:"Oh, woe i s me, an ol d, unf or t unat e Geni e! J i r j i s, t he mi ght y,mer ci l ess ki ng of al l Shai t ans and I f r i t s, has not f or got t en our anci entf eud and has sent hi s most awf ul monst er af t er me!"

    Wi t h t hese wor ds he shot st r ai ght up f r om t he pavement and, somewher eon t he l evel of t he t hi r d or f our t h st or ey, he t ook of f hi s hat , waved i t t oVol ka, and sl owl y di ssol ved i n t he ai r , shout i ng:

    "I ' l l f i nd you agai n, 0 Vol ka i bn Al yosha! I ki ss t he dust beneat h yourf eet ! Good- bye! "

    To t el l t he t r ut h, Vol ka was happy t he ol d man had vani shed. Ot hert hi ngs wer e pr essi ng on hi s mi nd, and he f el t f ai nt at t he thought of havi ngt o r et urn home.

    Real l y now, t r y to i magi ne your sel f i n hi s pl ace. He had l ef t t he housei n the mor ni ng t o t ake a geography exami nat i on, t hen go t o t he movi es and be

    back f or supper as expect ed, at si x- t hi r t y. I nst ead, he was r et ur ni ng af t erni ne, havi ng f ai l ed hi s exami nat i on mi serabl y, and, what was most hor r i bl e,wi t h shaved cheeks! And hi m not even t hi r t een yet ! No mat t er how he r ackedhi s br ai ns, he coul d not f i nd a sol ut i on. Thus, wi t hout havi ng t hought ofanythi ng, he dr agged hi s f eet back t o hi s qui et si de st r eet , now f ul l ofl ong eveni ng shadows.

    He wal ked past t he sur pr i sed j ani t or , ent er ed t he downst ai r s hal l ,cl i mbed a f l i ght of st ai r s and, wi t h a heavy si gh, pr essed t he bel l . Hecoul d hear someone' s s t eps, and a st r ange voi ce asked t hrough t he door :

    "Who' s t her e?"" I t ' s me, " Vol ka want ed t o say, but suddenl y r emembered t hat , as of

    t hi s morni ng, he di dn' t l i ve t her e any more.Wi t hout answer i ng t he new t enant , he r an downst ai r s, mar ched by t he

    st i l l puzzl ed j ani t or nonchal ant l y, r eached t he mai n st r eet , and boar ded at r ol l ey- bus. Thi s cert ai nl y was hi s unl ucky day: somewher e, most pr obabl y att he movi es, he had l ost hi s change- pur se, so he had t o get out and wal khome.

    Least of al l , Vol ka want ed t o meet a cl assmat e, but most unbear abl e wast he t hought t hat he woul d have t o f ace Goga- t he- Pi l l . Sl y Fat e had addedi nsul t t o i nj ur y: f r om t hi s day f or t h t hey wer e bot h t o l i ve i n t he samehouse.

    Sur e enough, no sooner di d he ent er t he yard of hi s new house t han anunbear abl e, f ami l i ar voi ce shout ed:

    "Hi , nut t y! Who was t he ol d bi r d you l ef t school wi t h t oday?"Goga- t he- Pi l l r an up t o Vol ka, wi nki ng i nsol ent l y and pul l i ng t he most

    i nsul t i ng f aces."He wasn' t an ol d bi r d, he was a ni ce ol d man, " Vol ka sai d peaceabl y,

    as he di dn' t want t o end t he day wi t h a f i ght . "He' s . . . he' s my f at her ' sf r i end f r om Tashkent . "

    "What i f I j e- ee- st go t o your f at her and j e- ee- st t el l hi m about yourmonkey- busi ness at t he exam! "

    "Oh, Pi l l , you' ve gone cr yi ng f or a beat i ng t oo l ong! " Vol ka f l ar ed up,i magi ni ng what an i mpressi on Pi l l ' s words woul d have on hi s parent s. "Why,you di r t y t at t l e- t al e! I ' l l push your f ace i n!"

    "Now, now, t ake i t easy! A person can' t even j oke any more. You' r er eal l y a nut ! "

    Fear i ng Vol ka' s f i st s, whi ch, af t er sever al encount er s, Goga chose t oavoi d, he dashed headl ong i nto the ent r ance of t he house i n whi ch he was nowt o l i ve i n danger ous cl oseness t o Vol ka, whose new apar t ment was on the samel andi ng.

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    "Bal d peopl e! A count r y of bal d peopl e!" Goga shout ed, st i cki ng hi shead out t he f r ont door . He showed Vol ka hi s t ongue and, f ear i ng the ot her ' sr i ght eous anger , f l ew up t he stai r s, t wo at a ti me, t o hi s own door.

    However , he was di st r act ed by t he myst er i ous behavi our of a hugeSi ber i an cat f r om apar t ment 43. The cat , named "Homych" i n honour of thepopul ar f oot bal l goal i e, was st andi ng on t he stai r s wi t h hi s back ar ched andhi ssi ng at not hi ng at al l .

    Goga' s f i r st t hought was t hat t he cat had gone mad. He r ef l ected agai nand was near l y cer t ai n t hat mad cat s kept t hei r t ai l s bet ween t hei r l egs,

    whi l e Homych' s t ai l was st i cki ng up st r ai ght ,