The Power of Talk:Who Gets Heard and Why

Petra Formanová

Daniela Jiroutová

Petra Kliková

Kateřina Lípová

Matěj Mareš

Linguistic Style

* Talking is characterised by:* Certain tone of voice

* Certain rate of speed

* Certain degree of loudness

* Features of talking include:* Directness or indirectness

* Pacing and pausing

* Word choice

* Use of jokes, figures of speech, stories, questions and apologies

The Role of self-confidence

* Judgment about confidence is based on how people present themselves when talking

* The way we talk and listen is influenced by cultural experience

* Women have often learned different styles of speaking than men

Girls vs. Boys

* Girls tend to learn conversational rituals that focus on the rapport dimension of relationships whereas boys tend to learn rituals that focus on the status dimension.

Girls

* Girls tend to play with a single best friend or in small groups, and they spend a lot of time talking

* They use language to negotiate how close they are

* A group of girls will ostractize a girl who calls attention to her own superiority and criticize her* E.g. A girl who tells everyone what to do is

called „bossy“

Boys

* Usually play in larger groupsin which more boys can be included, but not everyone is treated equally

* Boys with high status in their group are usually seen as the leaders

* They learn to use language to negotiate their status in the group by displaying their abilities and knowledge, and by challenging others and resisting challenges

Getting Credit

* Even such a small thing as choice of pronoun can decide on who gets the credit (Me x I)* Man tend to use „I“ when talking about

what they have done, whereas woman usually say „we“ eventhough they have done it by themselves

* Credit is automatically given to the person using „I“

Confidence and Boasting

* Confidence is judged by an individual´s behavior, especially verbal behavior

* Woman again are at a disadvantage* They uderestimate themselves in public so

as not to seem boastful, eventhough they know that they are just as good as man

* These habits result from from the socialization of boys and girls by their

peers in childhood play

Asking Questions

* Asking the right questions is one of the hallmarks of a good manager how and when questions are asked can send unintended signals about competence and power

* Along with cultural influences and individual personality, gender seems to play a role in whether and when people ask questions* E.g. Asking for directions while driving –

men seem less likely to ask than women

Conversational Rituals

* Conversation is fundamentally ritual in the sense that we speak in ways our culture has conventionalized and expect certain types of responses* E.g. „How are you?“ is obviously a ritualized

way to start conversation rather than a request for information

Apologies

* Women tend to say I´m sorry more frequently than men, and often they intend it in this way - as a ritualized means of expressing concern

* Ritual apologies * like other conversational rituals - work well

when both parties share the same assumptions about their use

Feedback

* Styles of giving feedback

contain a ritual element that

often causes misunderstanding

Compliments

* Common ritual to exchange compliments

* Women* More often done between women (kind of

automatic recognition, not expecting a critique) x fewer men are likely to ask because it can lead to an unwanted critique

* Men* Men looking for an opportunity to put others

down and take the one-up position for themselves (women in contrast – self-degradation - but expecting sb. to pull them back up)

Ritual Opposition

* Rituals like apologizing, miting criticism with praise and exchanging compliments that are taken literally

* Ritual fight – an exploration through verbal communication, finding own weaknesses and testing ideas (one moment collegues shouting to each other, a while after best friends), → ritual opposition as a tool for expressing potential and strenghts (sometimes used by companies as a confontational interviewing technique)

Negotiating Authority

* Formal authority coming from position * Actual authority has to be negotiated day

to day (reinforcing or undercutting an effort)

Indirectness

* Tendency to say what we mean without spelling it out

* Can couse enomorous misunderstanding* 2nd in command are more likely to express

themselves indirectly

Negotiating AuthorityManaging Up and Down

Women* do a great job is not the only one necessary to

do for rewarding and authority* women as bosses are more concerned about the

other‘s feelings – downplaying rather then flaunting their superiority)

Men* People have to promote themselves (men)* Communication, conversation with the boss

Thank you for your attention!