things you definitely don't want to hear during surgery
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Things you definitely don't want to hear during surgeryTRANSCRIPT
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Things YouDefinitely Don’t
Want to HearDuring Surgery
Things YouDefinitely Don’t
Want to HearDuring Surgery
Better save that. We'llneed it for the autopsy.Better save that. We'llneed it for the autopsy.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Steril, shcmeril. Thefloor's clean, right?Steril, shcmeril. Thefloor's clean, right?
Someone call the janitor -we're going to need amop & a bucket.
Someone call the janitor -we're going to need amop & a bucket.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
"Accept this sacrifice, OhGreat Lord of Darkness""Accept this sacrifice, OhGreat Lord of Darkness"
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Bo! Bo! Come back withthat! Bad Dog!Bo! Bo! Come back withthat! Bad Dog!
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
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Wait a minute, if this ishis spleen, then what'sthat?
Wait a minute, if this ishis spleen, then what'sthat?
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Hand me that...uh...thatuh.....thingieHand me that...uh...thatuh.....thingie
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Oh no! Has anyone seenmy Rolex?Oh no! Has anyone seenmy Rolex?
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Oops! Hey, has anyoneever survived 500ml ofthis stuff before?
Oops! Hey, has anyoneever survived 500ml ofthis stuff before?
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Damn, there go the lightsagain...Damn, there go the lightsagain...
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
"Ya know, there's bigmoney in kidneys. Hell,the guy's got two of 'em.
"Ya know, there's bigmoney in kidneys. Hell,the guy's got two of 'em.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
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Everybody stand back! Ilost my contact lens!Everybody stand back! Ilost my contact lens!
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Could you stop that thingfrom beating; it's throwingoff my concentration
Could you stop that thingfrom beating; it's throwingoff my concentration
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
What the heck is thisdoing here?What the heck is thisdoing here?
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
I hate it when they'remissing stuff in here.I hate it when they'remissing stuff in here.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
That's cool! Now canyou make his other legtwitch?!
That's cool! Now canyou make his other legtwitch?!
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
I wish I hadn't forgottenmy glasses.I wish I hadn't forgottenmy glasses.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
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Well folks, this will be anexperiment for all of us.Well folks, this will be anexperiment for all of us.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
What do mean he wasn'tin for a sex change??!!What do mean he wasn'tin for a sex change??!!
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Anyone see where I leftthat scalpel?Anyone see where I leftthat scalpel?
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
And now we remove thesubject's brain and placeit in the body of the ape.
And now we remove thesubject's brain and placeit in the body of the ape.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
OK, now take a picturefrom this angle. This istruly a freak of nature.
OK, now take a picturefrom this angle. This istruly a freak of nature.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
This patient has alreadyhad some kids, am Icorrect?
This patient has alreadyhad some kids, am Icorrect?
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
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Nurse, did this patientsign the organ donationcard?
Nurse, did this patientsign the organ donationcard?
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Don't worry. I’m prettysure it’s sharp enough.Don't worry. I’m prettysure it’s sharp enough.
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
What do you mean youwant a divorce?What do you mean youwant a divorce?
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
She's gonna blow!Everyone take cover!!!She's gonna blow!Everyone take cover!!!
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone getout!FIRE! FIRE! Everyone getout!
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
Damn! Page 47 of themanual is missing!Damn! Page 47 of themanual is missing!
Things You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During SurgeryThings You Definitely Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
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Oxymoronsfor the AgesOxymoronsOxymoronsfor the Agesfor the Ages
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Act naturallyAct naturally
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
FoundFoundmissingmissing
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Resident alienResident alien
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
AdvancedAdvancedBASICBASIC
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
GenuineGenuineimitationimitation
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Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Safe sexSafe sex
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Airline foodAirline food
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Good griefGood grief
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
SameSamedifferencedifference
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
AlmostAlmostexactlyexactly
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
GovernmentGovernmentorganizationorganization
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Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
SanitarySanitarylandfilllandfill
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
AloneAlonetogethertogether
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Legally drunkLegally drunk
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Silent screamSilent scream
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
BritishBritishfashionfashion
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Living deadLiving dead
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Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Small crowdSmall crowd
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
BusinessBusinessethicsethics
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Soft rockSoft rock
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Butt headButt head
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
MilitaryMilitaryintelligenceintelligence
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
SoftwareSoftwaredocumentationdocumentation
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Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
CaliforniaCaliforniacultureculture
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
New classicNew classic
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Sweet sorrowSweet sorrow
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
ChildproofChildproof
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
PassivePassiveaggressionaggression
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
ClearlyClearlymisunderstoodmisunderstood
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Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Twelve-ounceTwelve-ouncepound cakepound cake
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Rap musicRap music
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
SyntheticSyntheticnatural gasnatural gas
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Taped liveTaped live
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
ClearlyClearlymisunderstoodmisunderstood
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Peace forcePeace force
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Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Cleveland lifeCleveland life
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
TemporaryTemporarytax increasetax increase
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
ComputerComputerjockjock
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
PlasticPlasticglassesglasses
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
TerriblyTerriblypleasedpleased
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
ComputerComputersecuritysecurity
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Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Tight slacksTight slacks
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
DefiniteDefinitemaybemaybe
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Pretty uglyPretty ugly
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
Diet ice-creamDiet ice-cream
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
WorkingWorkingvacationvacation
Oxymorons for the AgesOxymorons for the Ages
ExactExactestimateestimate
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Actual JobEvaluationsActual JobEvaluations
Since my last report,he has reached rockbottom and hasstarted to dig.
Since my last report,he has reached rockbottom and hasstarted to dig.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
His men would followhim anywhere, butonly out of morbidcuriosity.
His men would followhim anywhere, butonly out of morbidcuriosity.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
I would not allow thisemployee to breed.I would not allow thisemployee to breed.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
This employee is notso much of a has-been, but more of adefinitely won't be.
This employee is notso much of a has-been, but more of adefinitely won't be.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
Works well whenunder constantsupervision andcornered like a rat ina trap.
Works well whenunder constantsupervision andcornered like a rat ina trap.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
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When she opens hermouth, it seems thatthis is only to changewhichever foot waspreviously in there.
When she opens hermouth, it seems thatthis is only to changewhichever foot waspreviously in there.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
He would be out ofhis depth in a parkinglot puddle.
He would be out ofhis depth in a parkinglot puddle.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
This young lady hasdelusions ofadequacy.
This young lady hasdelusions ofadequacy.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
She sets low personalstandards and thenconsistently fails toachieve them.
She sets low personalstandards and thenconsistently fails toachieve them.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
This employee shouldgo far ...and thesooner he starts, thebetter.
This employee shouldgo far ...and thesooner he starts, thebetter.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
This employee isdepriving a villagesomewhere of anidiot.
This employee isdepriving a villagesomewhere of anidiot.
Actual Performance EvaluationsActual Performance Evaluations
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ActualBumperStickers
ActualBumperStickers
Change is inevitable,except from avending machine
Change is inevitable,except from avending machine
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
I’m out of my mind.Back in five minutes.I’m out of my mind.Back in five minutes.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Laugh alone and theworld thinks you'rean idiot
Laugh alone and theworld thinks you'rean idiot
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Texas - At least ourcows are sane!Texas - At least ourcows are sane!
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
The gene pool coulduse a little chlorineThe gene pool coulduse a little chlorine
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
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I didn't fight myway to the top ofthe food chain justto be a vegetarian
I didn't fight myway to the top ofthe food chain justto be a vegetarian
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Your kid may be anhonor student butyou're still an IDIOT!
Your kid may be anhonor student butyou're still an IDIOT!
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
I took an IQ testand the resultswere negative
I took an IQ testand the resultswere negative
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
If we aren'tsupposed to beeating animals,then why are theymade of meat?
If we aren'tsupposed to beeating animals,then why are theymade of meat?
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Forget about worldpeace...
...visualize usingyour turn signal
Forget about worldpeace...
...visualize usingyour turn signal
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Warning: Dates onthe calendar arecloser than theyappear
Warning: Dates onthe calendar arecloser than theyappear
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
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Give me ambiguityor give mesomething else
Give me ambiguityor give mesomething else
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Make it idiot proofand someone willmake a better idiot
Make it idiot proofand someone willmake a better idiot
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
He who laughs lastthinks slowestHe who laughs lastthinks slowest
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Always rememberyou're unique...justlike everyone else
Always rememberyou're unique...justlike everyone else
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Puritanism:The haunting fearthat someone,somewhere may behappy
Puritanism:The haunting fearthat someone,somewhere may behappy
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
I souport publikedukasionI souport publikedukasion
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
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There are 3 kinds ofpeople: those whocan count & thosewho can't
There are 3 kinds ofpeople: those whocan count & thosewho can't
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Diplomacy is the artof saying 'Nicedoggie!'... till youcan find a big rock
Diplomacy is the artof saying 'Nicedoggie!'... till youcan find a big rock
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
I like you, but Iwouldn't want tosee you workingwith subatomicparticles
I like you, but Iwouldn't want tosee you workingwith subatomicparticles
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
All generalizationsare falseAll generalizationsare false
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Learn from yourparents' mistakes -use birth control
Learn from yourparents' mistakes -use birth control
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
I'm not as think asyou drunk I amI'm not as think asyou drunk I am
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
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Time is what keepseverything fromhappening at once
Time is what keepseverything fromhappening at once
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
The more people Imeet, the more Ilike my dog
The more people Imeet, the more Ilike my dog
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Women who seekto be equal to menlack ambition
Women who seekto be equal to menlack ambition
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Few women admittheir age...fewermen act it.
Few women admittheir age...fewermen act it.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
How can I miss youif you won't goaway?
How can I miss youif you won't goaway?
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Beauty is in the eyeof the beer holder...Beauty is in the eyeof the beer holder...
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
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Make it idiot proofand someone willmake a better idiot.
Make it idiot proofand someone willmake a better idiot.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
We are Microsoft.Resistance is futile.You will beassimilated.
We are Microsoft.Resistance is futile.You will beassimilated.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Horn broken. Watchfor finger.Horn broken. Watchfor finger.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
I love cats...theytaste just likechicken.
I love cats...theytaste just likechicken.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
As long as there aretests, there will beprayer in publicschools.
As long as there aretests, there will beprayer in publicschools.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Happiness is a belt-fed weapon.Happiness is a belt-fed weapon.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
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It is as BAD as youthink, and they AREout to get us.
It is as BAD as youthink, and they AREout to get us.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Friends don't letfriends drive naked.Friends don't letfriends drive naked.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Where there's a will,I want to be in it!Where there's a will,I want to be in it!
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
It's lonely at thetop, but you eatbetter.
It's lonely at thetop, but you eatbetter.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
We’re born naked,wet and hungry.Then things getworse.
We’re born naked,wet and hungry.Then things getworse.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Be nice to yourkids. They'll chooseyour nursing home.
Be nice to yourkids. They'll chooseyour nursing home.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
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Sorry, I don't dateoutside my species.Sorry, I don't dateoutside my species.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
I don't suffer frominsanity, I enjoyevery minute of it.
I don't suffer frominsanity, I enjoyevery minute of it.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers
Hard work has afuture payoff.Laziness pays offNOW.
Hard work has afuture payoff.Laziness pays offNOW.
Actual Bumper StickersActual Bumper Stickers