VOL. 58 ISSUE 12

S T R A N DTHE

MYSTERIOUS CREATURE FOUND AT VIC

NAME: STRANDFORDTALENT: SCREAMING INTO VOID

YEARBOOK QUOTE: “WHEN I DIE. THEN YOU WILL REALIZE.”

DRAKE IS NOT IN THIS ISSUEJK PAGE 5

HOROSCOPESpisces: Today will be a good day and because of that you will be more open to the world around you.

leo:Make sure you appreciate others. By doing this, you

will learn to better appreciate yourself.

gemini:You need to take a step back and really look at who you are. People treat you like a goddess and you don’t EVER take notice. You’re too busy going out with your friends to spend just ONE night a week with your boy-friend watching TV. Just one night. I don’t care if you don’t want to watch Firefly, I watch your stupid little home decor shows. I miss you Jennifer.

Please call me.

more on page 17

star wars: rogue one trailer:THE PEOPLE RESPOND“LOOKS GOOD”PAGE 22

not sure who this is

VIC PRESIDENT WILL ROBINS GETS IN TWITTER FEUD WITH SMARTEST HUMAN ALIVE RICHARD DAWKINSPAGE 20

LOOKING FOR ANSWERSPLEASE SOMEONE DM ME

norm kelly: dead?page 4

THE STRAND PLAYS NEKO ATSUMEYOU WON’T WANT TO MISS THIS!PAGE 18

all photos shot on iphone (tM)

Definitely Real Actual News • The Strand

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OPINIONS NOW FACTS, Confirms Strand Opinions EditorOlivia Dziwak | Opinions (News) Editor

In a surprise move last Sunday, The Strand’s Opinions Editor, Olivia Dzi-wak, confirmed in an interview with The Strand’s Opinions Editor, Olivia Dziwak, that opinions are now facts. This an-nouncement was made in light of extreme pressure from the University of Toronto, in a move commonly referred to as “the end of term.”

“We’ve looked at the facts,” she was quoted as saying, “and our opinion on the facts is that that is what they are.” When asked to clarify this comment, Dziwak explained that the approaching end of term has created a facts shortage that ne-cessitates the use of opinions as facts. “We took a long hard look at what we had, which was the facts, and realized we were very soon going to run out of them. The

facts. There just aren’t enough of them, is our opinion, which, as you know, is just the facts.”

Many wide-sweeping changes will be coming into effect as a result of this re-orientation to reality. Students who were absolutely for real interviewed for this ar-ticle said with confidence that they would be able to clear away the vast majority of their previously daunting workload. “Oh yeah, I feel great about it,” said Astu Dent. “Now that my opinions are facts, I’m pretty sure I know everything. Actu-ally, I’m thinking I’ve already graduated. Yep, that sounds about right. I’m done.”

The impact on the scientific commu-nity has yet to be properly gauged, but many Life Science students were sighted looking more stressed and anxious than

was previously thought humanly possible. “We’re very worried,” said a lab-coated in-dividual, trapped out in the open during a coffee run. “What if my prof decides it’s possible to read 20 slides in the last three minutes of class after all? Will that break the time-space continuum? Will that mean I actually have to know all those slides for the exam?!”

Changes will also be coming into ef-fect at The Strand itself, which will be see-ing a wide-scale internal reorganization. The section formerly known as News will be absorbed into the Opinions section, and the former Editorial page will be relabeled “Facts That We Think, Which Therefore Are Facts.” Arts & Culture will boast the new name of “Facts About Fancy Art,” while Film & Music will be

referred to as “Facts About Affordable Art.” The centrespread Features section will hereafter be known as “Big ol’ Facts.” Stranded will be left untouched, because the sanctity of the humour section must be preserved at all costs.

The News, Editorial, Arts & Culture, Film & Music, and Features section heads of The Strand were all unavailable to com-ment, mostly because we didn’t ask them.

At press time, Opinions Editor Ol-ivia Dziwak had promoted herself into the role of Editor-in-Chief because she thought she deserved it and, as a result, does in fact deserve it.

Emily Pollock | Alleged Student

UofT Faculty shocked to discover students at own university

Last week, University of Toronto Presi-dent Meric Gertler was informed that there are multiple students enrolled in the university. The long-time university president came under fire recently for his lack of action on fossil fuel divestment. In an exclusive interview with a correspon-dent for The Strand, he was asked to com-ment on student opposition to the move. Instead of answering, he squinted at the interviewer and mouthed the word, “Stu-dents?”

As the correspondent attempted to keep the conversation on-track, Gertler rubbed his temples. “Wait, what, you mean we have students? I mean, here? At UofT?”

When the correspondent affirmed that they themselves were, in fact, a stu-dent, President Gertler shook his head.

“Nuh-uh. That’s…no way. I mean, I knew there were students at other univer-sities. But…oh man, I’ve got to…” He pulled out his phone.

“Pamela, I heard this terrible ru-mour today. Did you…oh my God. Re-ally?” There was a long pause in President Gertler’s response. “I mean, is that even sanitary?”

When Gertler was asked what ex-actly he thought the university was here for, he looked at the correspondent with a haunted look in his eyes and muttered something about graduate-level research.

After several calls to the university, the correspondent was no closer to find-ing a university representative who would comment on the issue. When asked to comment on the president’s complete lack of knowledge about the people he al-

legedly represents, a representative from the Provost’s office said, “Wait, ‘students’ are those little glass tubes they do science with, right? Like, the mad tiny ones?” The Office of Alumni Affairs sent The Strand a strongly-worded email saying that, while students were nice in theory, they would get in the way of the university’s real pur-pose: naming enormous piles of money after donors and then setting them on fire. The call to the Dean’s Office resulted in the representative trying to pretend that he was the answering machine to avoid answering the questions, a pitiful move that embarrassed everyone involved.

The Strand was also unable to get feedback from any of the university’s al-leged students. Although our exhausted correspondent camped out in Sidney Smith for days, she was unable to ap-

proach any students with her questions about the university’s oversight. Appar-ently, they “scattered like gazelles” when approached by a person with a clipboard, terrified that they might be asked to sign something.

President Gertler was last seen wan-dering off toward Queen’s Park, tie askew. As of press time, the President’s Office has neither confirmed nor denied the ex-istence of the 85,000 students ostensibly studying at the University of Toronto. The official statement reads, “Listen, we may have made some mistakes, but we think what’s really important is that we’re still Canada’s best research university. Oh wait, did McGill climb in the rankings again? Shit, we’d better check.”

STUDENTS?

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Opinions (and Science, because they’re the same thing, right?) • The Strand

This FEMALE Vic student said WHAT about our gender stats????????Nicole Paroyan | Lookin’ 4 love

While many schools in Canada boast of gender parity on their university campus-es, Vic has gone well beyond the 50 per-cent threshold. In its current state, Victo-ria College has a student body comprised of 75 percent women and 25 percent men. As I sit and ponder my successes and failures at Victoria College, I cannot help but focus on one glaring issue—our gender statistics.

As a woman myself, I love my gender. Many of my friends are women, and I ad-mire many of them. Nevertheless, while receiving an education is important, so is finding some L-O-V-E.

When I spoke to a group of female students at various small-town univer-sities, they bragged about the variety of men available to them. One student re-marked, “My last boyfriend was a Jewish Studies major AND a member of the var-sity golf team. We have options; choice.” That last word stuck with me. Choice. How can the best university in Canada not provide its student body with the very thing that makes us human?

Amid complaints from thousands of

single women, I propose a radical and yet logical solution to this growing problem. Victoria College must put a cap on the number of female students admitted to the university. This measure is necessary in order to provide equal opportunities to the thousands of young men trying to make it in an increasingly competitive work environment. Additionally, by re-fusing to admit 50 percent men, Victoria College is prioritizing the romantic needs of men over those of women.

A student at Vic who prefers to re-main anonymous left me with a story all too familiar to female Vic students: “As I got ready to watch that week’s episode of Girls with my boyfriend, I walked in on him with a book—Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace. At that moment, I knew I should leave him. Instead, we stayed to-gether only to break up three years later, after he told me I wasn’t enough of a fem-inist for him.”

Those hoping to support my campaign can direct all future inquiries to my Twitter page, @MRSeducation.

property of the strand

5 Planets Outside Our Solar System You’ll Want to Move To Right After Finishing This Article

Tanuj Kumar | Science-er-in-Chief

Hello! I’m Tanuj Kumar, the fresh, new editor of The Strand’s fresh, new Science section! This section will aim to elucidate all the mysteries of the universe, from providing you with the newest, most rev-olutionary insights, to detailed critiques on scientific ethics and workplace issues. Please stay tuned for its debut next year in 2017!

Gliese 581 cIf you’ve ever wanted to live life in a death metal album, look no further than Gliese 581 c. With black plants and red skies due to the light of the red dwarf Gliese 581, now you can live on a planet as dark and evil as the under-belly of Robarts. Of course, no pictures of the surface exist. Just look at a black square and pretend it’s a close-up of a leaf. I’m sure that sending radio mes-sages to this place would return Eva-nescence lyrics.

Kepler 16-bAstronomers call this place “Tatooine,” after the sandy, binary-star-orbiting Star Wars desert world, because they’re a bunch of nerds and were probably waiting and twiddling their thumbs in anticipation to discover the first planet that revolved around two stars. These folks probably go to their fancy phys-ics parties and brag about how they’re true fans. I bet this place doesn’t have a grain of sand. It’s likelier to just be icy, since it’s at the edge of the habitable zone. Are you really a true fan if you mistake Hoth for Tatooine?

55 Cancri ePhilosophers say that two things are eternal for the UofT student: stress and student loans. You’ll want to take a trip to 55 Cancri e, a planet that is essen-tially made of pure diamond, to get the financial equivalent of a medium-sized nation in order to pay those loans off.

While you’re at it, you’ll finally have a way to dismantle the artificial monop-oly that inflates diamond prices. So get to it. Destroy capitalism. Do it.

Gliese 1214 bThis is probably the place you’d try vis-iting after singeing your eyebrows on HD 149026 b. Gliese 1214 b is a giant swimming pool. A water world, if you will, even though the cost to fly here would still probably be less than the production costs of Kevin Reynolds’s similarly-named film. On the plus side, we have an entire planet’s worth of wa-ter to use just in case we run out of it here. Where else will we get more to spray onto our golf courses?

Gliese 436 bThis Wilhelm Gliese dude sure is pop-ular. I don’t think he would have ever thought that his convenient catalogue of stars would contain such strange

places, but that’s what happens when you accidentally slap your name on half of the known stars in the galaxy. Gliese 436 b, perhaps the strangest and most unique of the planets, is covered in a special type of pressurized ice that is hot to the touch. Burning hot. That’s right, now you can live on a Planet of Ice and Fire. At 33.4 light years away, you’ll probably get there before George R. R. Martin releases his next book in the series anyway.

Female Authors Hate Him!“Canadian literary figure has discovered a revolutionary new way to alienate HUGE numbers of young book lovers!”

Approximate artistic rendering.

artisan water

100% authentic

Arts You’ve Probably Never Heard of & Culture • The Strand

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Top 8 Hipster Joints in Toronto The 6ixClarrie Feinstein | Recovering Hipster

Enjoy The Strand’s guide to the top hipster joints in the city. As Toronto culture is ex-panding, some areas in this urban metropo-lis are showing the full potential of what this city has to offer. From vintage arcade bars, to underground dance dens, to taco-only res-taurants, the city has gone from mediocrity to cultural virtuosity. Is Drake to thank for that? Maybe, but this list will show you that Toronto has a lot to be credited for, even if we do call it “The 6ix” more frequently.

Fine Luke’s Dining (245 College St.)This diner is fairly new, having just opened up last year, but it has an old-school diner vibe reminding us all that diners are still su-per-cool (because the past is in). They serve the classics, but with a twist. Enjoy their chocolate-coffee caramel milkshake with a side of—you won’t believe it—brownie fries. It’s essentially deep fried brownies. Or the Luke’s Mega Burger with three meat patties, avocado, bacon, cheese, and garlic aioli. Can you say no to extremely unhealthy comfort food? Well, no, because then you’re not rid-ing the foodie trend that is taking our gen-eration by storm. Don’t forget to go to the ice cream shop Sweet Jesus afterwards for some dessert!

Grandma’s Closet (789 Augusta Ave.)At the very end of the main street in Kens-ington is Grandma’s Closet, a new clothing store selling vintage chic garments. Various apparel items litter the shop, with hats hang-ing from the ceiling, and shirts draped over suspended birch racks. They have a great selection of sunglasses ranging from $450-

$500—it’s a steal! At the back of the store is a hidden coffee lounge, where they spin vinyl classics and serve tasty Americanos and lattes. Sit on a beanbag chair, listen to some Clapton, and buy a nice wool sweater all in one go.

Hidden Dumpling (856 Ossington St.)When you walk down the long Ossington strip, there’s a secret doorway passage to owners Larry and Greg’s hidden apartment and patio restaurant! This dim sum haven is worth the wait, as the lineup usually goes down the block, but you’ll enjoy—at least—three tasty dim sum when the hour is up. Try their “Daaamn-Sum” dish; it’s incred-ibly flavourful and only $10 per dumpling. Sometimes during the week, specifically Sat-urdays (3-4 PM) and Tuesdays (1-2 AM), you can catch the owners Larry and Greg DJing some sweet 90s hip-hop.

Turn of the Century Bikes (somewhere in Parkdale)We are living in the age of the bicycle (seri-ously, if you don’t own a bike you are pretty much guaranteed to be socially ostracized for it). Bike stores have been cropping up all over the city selling the practical to the downright fancy. Turn of the Century Bikes delivers on the latter, selling reclaimed bikes from the early 1900s. Because of the age of these vintage vehicles, most of the parts need to be replaced, but it will have the feel of his-tory, which is the most important aspect—no one will know, but you will—that’s even more hip!

Ferret Café (198 College St.)After the popularity and warm reception of Cat Café, another branch was opened only a couple streets over. The creators, who own four ferrets, wanted to show that their furry children were not so different from your typical cats and dogs. While there have been reports that the ferrets are somewhat violent and unpredictable in nature, the original idea is attracting a large customer base. Dur-ing the last Friday of every month, they also play movies that feature ferrets, like Along Came Polly (the most frequently played), which demonstrates that ferrets are amiable, if not better pets.

Knit a Sweater, Read a Book! (109 Queen St. W)The title of this adorable Queen West cove says it all. Part bookstore, part yarn shop—you can sit down with your fellow readers and knitters and collectively indulge in the coziest of activities. This old Victorian house has been converted into a community space, where book clubs, poetry readings, and ac-tivist groups can gather and discuss their grievances over knitting various garments. The owners close up the shop fairly early, although residents have spotted people en-tering the shop during the early hours of the morning. Many rumors have been circulat-ing on what could be occurring during these odd hours. Is the store a front for a grow-op? Toronto mafia? Underground disco? Be-come a member and find out!

The Gatsby (north of Shaw and Queen)This The Great Gatsby themed bar is all the

rage in Toronto. Every weekend, the bar hosts a Gatsby party, where people must wear 1920s apparel in order to gain entry. Once inside, the space is decorated to the nines, with champagne glass pyramids that are miraculously refilled, even though wait staff isn’t hired. At midnight, the bartender, Jay, pulls out his suit and performs with his jazz band to the frenzied crowd with aerial silk dancers descending to the stage. In the morning, The Gatsby resembles a normal, everyday bar…not even a speck of glitter can be spotted of the previous festivities.

The Watering Hole (74 Dufferin St.)This new hot spot is gaining quite the fol-lowing. The upper floor is a hot yoga stu-dio, apparently taking “hot” to even higher temperatures. Some would question the ex-tremes used but participants say the effects are drastic—their dehydration is through the roof! Which is why the main floor is home to a water bar, which sells various types of nature’s finest creation. The most popular customer choices are “Berry Storm” (wa-ter infused with berry essence) and “Cool Cucumber” (water with cucumber slices). While these drinks could easily be made at your own home, frequent customer Carol says, “There’s something satisfying about working all the water out of your body and then consuming professionally made water right after.” It’s her money, so we didn’t com-ment.

“art” | Emily Pollock

French Guys & Drake • The Strand

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Millennials everywhere have a new reason to worship at Aubrey “Drake” Graham’s feet after his latest an-nouncement. On April 5, Toronto’s deified rapper of-ficially released two new singles from his upcoming al-bum Views From the Six. On that fateful Tuesday, our tween selves had a sudden wave of nostalgia upon real-

izing that Drake’s latest single cover designs were created on Picnik, the original selfie-editing program. After the program was shut down years ago, many were heartbro-ken—until now. While cadences of other fan-favourites FotoFlexer and Piczo can be seen on the covers for Pop Style and One Dance, Drake spoke with the former CEO of Picnik to revive the popular editing website to create the pictures you will see every time you open iTunes.

The special edition OVO x Picnik collaboration is one of many outreaches Drake has fostered in the past few years. From pioneering his own brand of whiskey to repping the Toronto Raptors basketball team, Drake has cultivated a multifaceted public persona—but there has been a missing flourish in his product portfolio, a miss-ing link until now. The OVO x Picnik project will be ground-breaking for Drake’s industry. This manoeuvre shows that Drake is not too godly for us, and he can still represent himself through a generic cursive font on a solid background.

When asked to comment on this new feat, Drake simply told The Strand that his inspiration to revive the software stemmed from the nostalgia that he, and many others, have for the culturally effervescent year of 2006. “I wanted my latest single covers to remind you of those creative projects in middle school when you would get to throw together a flame track on GarageBand. There was always that one kid who knew Picnik in and out, you know? That kid who always knew how to make those

cool little hearts to add to a picture? When you had that kid in your project group, you always ended up with this masterpiece of a cover for your work, and I wanted to have that aesthetic associated with my brand today.”

Drake and his team have always been up-to-date on trends in order to enhance the rapper’s brand, and this business move to incorporate the opulent Picnik program shows their drive to refine Drake’s image. With each of his new single covers, Drake displays today’s minimalis-tic tendencies through the use of vacant monochrome. It resonates with today’s throwback culture through the cover design’s confusing mixture of the gaudy font and lack of images.

Drake has always been an innovator, especially when taking something pre-existing and making it fit his own brand. While sitting in his courtside throne at the recent Raptors game, Drizzy felt excited about the prospects OVO x Picnik has for the future: “I’ve always felt like my vision has been bigger than the bigger picture. That’s why it was so important for me to bring Picnik back for this project, even though it faltered under the sheer pressure of a world looking to forget the fact that it ever tried to edit pictures on there. It’s time for this website to rebrand, like I did when I got this beard.”

The Picnik Revival:How Toronto’s Ambassador Is Bringing Simplicity Back

cinema studies 101a visual guide

As I say farewell to my days of Cinema Studies at the University of Toronto, I want to offer a visual syllabus of film theory’s forefathers. Here’s a crash course in film studies, pointing out the commonalities shared by this group of mostly-French men named Jean, who pio-neered commentary on the visual medium we all know and love, and smoked a lot of cigarettes in front of black-boards with French words on them.

ANDRE BAZINThe founder of the essential Cahiers du Cinema intro-duced us to a lot of really interesting movies—really, all of them are so interesting! Maybe you guys have heard of Jean-Luc Godard? Great guy. Anyway, here’s Bazin.

JACQUES MARIE ÉMILE LACANYes, Lacan’s middle name is Marie. The size of this man’s cigar really emphasizes his importance to the history of film theory. Without him, I would never have realized that every cinematic experience is really a reflection of the viewers’ castration anxiety. And if that doesn’t apply to you, well, I don’t know what to say. Maybe you just haven’t watched a movie.

ROLAND BARTHESYou’ve probably encountered this sly motherfucker in other courses, and can probably tell from the IDGAF look on his face that Barthes knows he has shaped mod-ern semiotics and visual theory. Again, not a film theorist per se, but we still had to talk about him a lot, and from his look it’s pretty clear that Roland B. fits right in.

JEAN-LUC GODARDNot a theorist per se but truly the greatest filmmaker since Orson Welles, only kind of better because he re-ally pioneered the medium by doing things like jump cuts and disrespecting a lot of women. Here’s the OG himself. And don’t forget, he’s also a good person who loves dogs.

PETER WOLLENWollen distances himself from the rest of the bunch by being British, wearing plaid, having a lot of not gray hair, and rolling his sleeves up like a chiller. Truly a man ahead of his time.

LAURA MULVEY Formative feminist film theorist Laura Mulvey concep-tualized the term “male gaze” with her essay “Visual Pleasures in Narrative Cinema.” Couldn’t find a snap of Mulvey with any form of tobacco, not sure what else she lacks in common with the rest of the group.

Holly McKenzie-Sutter | Saw Some Movies Once

Alexandra Scandolo | The “Drake” Writer

OUR MASTHEAD

The Strand has been the newspaper of record for Victoria University since 1953. It is published 12 times a year with a circulation of 2000 and is dis-tributed in Victoria University buildings and across the University of Toronto’s St. George campus.

The Strand flagrantly enjoys its editorial autonomy and is committed to acting as an agent of con-structive social change. As such, we will not pub-lish material deemed to exhibit racism, sexism, homo/transphobia, ableism, or other oppressive language.

The Strand is a proud member of the Canadian University Press (CUP).

Our offices are located at 150 Charles St. W., Toronto, ON, M5S 1K9. Please direct enquiries by email to editor@thestrand.ca. Submissions are welcome and may be edited for taste, brevity, and legality.

Follow us on Twitter for news and updates:@strandpaper

t

Anthony BurtonRhianna Jackson-KelsoHolly McKenzie-Sutter

Nicole ParoyanNEWS

news@thestrand.ca

FEATURESfeatures@thestrand.ca

EDITORS-IN-CHIEF editor@thestrand.ca

Olivia DziwakOPINIONSopinions@thestrand.ca

Geoff BaillieClaire Wilkins

Clarrie FeinsteinARTS & CULTUREartsandculture@thestrand.ca

Bronwyn Nisbet-GrayFILM & MUSICfilmandmusic@thestrand.ca

Neil MacIsaacSTRANDEDstranded@thestrand.ca

Jake McNairCOPY EDITINGcopy@thestrand.ca

CONTRIBUTORS

Harpreet Chohan, Ariana Douglas, Neil McKen-zie-Sutter, Sabrina Papas, Aaron Rambhajan, Stephanie Spagnuolo

COPY EDITORS

Sabrina Papas

ILLUSTRATIONS

Seolim Hong, Emily Pollock

PHOTOS

Courtesy Wikimedia Commons and the Univer-sity of Toronto Visual Studies Department

CREATIVE ADVERTISING DIRECTORS

Anthony Burton, Emily Pollock

Genevieve WakutzPHOTOphoto@thestrand.ca

Seolim HongARTart@thestrand.ca

Emily PollockGrace Quinsey

DESIGNdesign@thestrand.ca

EDITORIAL ASSISTANTS Joshua KimTanuj KumarAinsley MacDougallTristan McGrath-WaughTamilore OshodiAlison Zhou

Kasra KoushanWEBweb@thestrand.ca

6

Not Dead Yet!

A lot can happen in three years. Try and place yourself in 2013, and think of where things are at now: Vice went from articles about taking acid and going to a Stephen Harper rally to a monolithic, legitimate journalistic en-tity; Ezra Levant and SUN TV came and went. Drake’s released three albums; The Strand’s written thousands upon thousands of words about these albums.

So why does it seem like it was just yesterday that I was sitting nervously in the brand new Goldring Centre, being interviewed for an Editorial Assistant position at The Strand? Maybe it’s because, after all the changes that The Strand’s gone through, it’s been such a huge part of my life ever since that day I sheepishly pitched a review of Nothing Was the Same in an interview. And despite all the talk about the death of newspapers over the last year, we haven’t gone away yet. That’s because of the passion that our readers, writers, editors, and everyone who is involved in The Strand bring every week.

The Strand is a community. Vic’s a tiny college. Chances are you know someone who has written for The Strand, or you’ve written for it yourself. The main role of a small, biweekly newspaper like The Strand isn’t to report cutting-edge information on municipal, national, or international politics. It’s a forum for us all to par-ticipate in, the place where voices get heard and people can share their opinions, arguments, and learn a thing or two. Words themselves don’t just build community—it’s all of our shared feelings and experiences that do. And feeling, above all, is what makes us who we are.

In my time at The Strand, I’ve been a part of many communities, some smaller, some larger. There have been the small groups suffering countless nights up until

3 AM in the Stroffice, tying everything together while slowly entering a state of Smash Mouth-induced delir-ium. There have been NASH conferences, whether in Ottawa (home of the world’s best Wine Rack) or here in Toronto (where I learned that a 9-hour plenary is the worst place to have a hangover). There is a huge and growing number of Vic clubs, levies, and events that constitute the Vic community, a community that we have tried our best to cover this year. I’m sure next year’s team, the most eager, diverse, and capable group of edi-tors I’ve seen yet, will continue to do this.

I’m about to turn the page on my own time here, and it’s bittersweet. I’d like to thank Claire for urging me to get involved three summers years ago; it’s shaped me into who I am today. Paula, you were a true mentor, and I wouldn’t have had any idea what I was doing without your help. To the entire team this year: you guys rock and I can’t wait to see how those of you who are sticking around continue the amazing work you did this year. And to my incredibly dedicated, intelligent friends and co-editors Holly and Rhianna: we might be hightailing it out of here, but the next step Soon Come.

So next year, when you see the fresh faces of Vic open their first copy of The Strand, you’ll know they’re about to become a part of the community that has shaped all of us into who we are today. And when you see them open up this copy, rest assured: despite the tire fire that is the newspaper industry as a whole, because of you, The Strand’s not dead yet. Far from it.

Anthony Burton | Editor-in-Chief (Outgoing)

Editors-in-ChiefErik Preston & Alexandra Scandolo

News EditorErin Calhoun

Opinions EditorShailee Koranne

Features EditorAinsley MacDougall

Arts & Culture EditorsMolly Kay & Elena Senechal-Becker

Film & Music EditorJoshua Kim

Stranded EditorCeleste Yim

Science EditorTanuj Kumar

Design EditorGenevieve Wakutz

Senior Copy EditorTristan McGrath-Waugh

Photo EditorVictoria Butler

Illustrations EditorLynn Seolim Hong

Web EditorKasra Koushan

Congratulations to our 2016-2017 masthead!

Monty Python Wiki

Editorial • The Strand

7

As I neglect my quickly-approaching final research papers of undergrad to write this little thing, I can’t help but nervous-chuckle about how appalled my high school self would be at my current study habits. Grade 12 @hollerdoller would have started work-ing weeks ahead and would be studying for an entire weekend before an exam, not be sitting in a campus office 36 hours before a major academic deadline designing a Na-tional Enquirer-esque cover and writing fake horoscopes. I also used to sleep. Basically, I used to be a nerd, but over the last few years, I’ve become a slightly related but quite dif-ferent brand of nerd. I have my colleagues and pals at The Strand to thank for that, and I couldn’t be more grateful for the years of joy, laughter, being tired, pizza, Photo-shop, yelling at computers, tracked changes, steadily increasing caffeine addiction, learn-

ing curves, listening to the “Disney villains” playlist, and, overall, a lot of good times in this office.

Two years ago, I was pretty disengaged from campus life and “too busy” to be in-volved (read: very lazy), when my friend and former EIC Amanda Ghazale Aziz rec-ommended that I write something for The Strand’s magazine. In the years that have passed, I have to thank Amanda for en-couraging me to get involved, and for her continued proof-reads, leadership, informed and constructive feedback, and encourage-ment over the years, as editorial positions have taken over my life in the best way.

This past year we’ve had some incred-ible work grace our pages, and I’m so proud that we’ve been able to publish some of the sharpest brains on campus. At the end of the day, the most rewarding part of this gig is

getting to work alongside some of the most enthusiastic, thoughtful, intelligent, and all-around great people at Vic. Basically, I had a lot of fun this year, I hope the rest of the crew did too, and I would have been swal-lowed by the void by now had it not been for all of you.

Special thanks to Amanda for getting me involved all those years ago, to last year’s EIC team of Amanda, Paula Razuri, and Emily Pollock for giving me some much-needed guidance as a newbie section editor and writer who didn’t know how to log into my email until halfway through September, and didn’t have a key to the building until much later than that. Thanks also to Rhi-anna and Anthony for co-running the ship and deciphering my illiterate text messages throughout the year, and to each section edi-tor, artist, photographer, writer, copy editor,

editorial assistant, and every last Strandie for making this year one to remember.

To incoming EICs Ally Scandolo and Erik Preston, and to the rest of the incoming masthead—I’d wish you luck, but I know you don’t need it. I can’t wait to see what you all do next year. This job ravaged my sleep schedule, my academic enthusiasm, and turned me into a mom before my years—and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I miss this dirty old office and the kids in it already. Please know that when I’m sleeping like a brick for a solid four weeks after this issue is finished, I will be missing you dearly in my unconscious state.

Thank you all, and good night.PS: Please clean the office. Please. Love

you. Bye.

Holly McKenzie-Sutter | Editor-in-Chief (Outgoing)

From the Editors,

The Strand offers an apology for neglecting to credit the Assistant Copy Editors for Issues 7, 8, 9, and 11 on our masthead pages. The Strand could not print and maintain the same level of quality without them, and we deeply regret our failure to properly represent their efforts. We will be amending the affected issues for the online editions of the paper, which can be found at www.issuu.com/thestrandpaper, over the next few days.

Belated credit and thanks to:Sarah Armoogam, Amanda Ghazale Aziz, Justine Chen, Alexandra Jones, Tanuj Kumar, Ainsley MacDougall, Tristan McGrath-Waugh, Sabrina Papas, Arjun Sawhney, Christian Schoug, and Alison Zhou.

I’ll start off by admitting that I’m really bad at two things: reminiscing and saying goodbye. With regards to the former, as that previous sentence might indicate, I get re-ally sappy whenever I try to talk about good things that are now over, and with regards to the latter, my time at The Strand has been a very good thing that is, unfortunately, soon to be over. So buckle up—this is going to get pretty syrupy.

Truly, The Strand has been such an im-portant part of my university experience. I can’t begin to imagine where or who I would be right now if this wonderful, ridiculous pa-per hadn’t taken over my life back in second year. From my time as a humble Editorial Assistant, to my stint as Senior Copy Edi-tor (which definitely shaved several years off my life and taught me way more than I ever thought I’d need to know about punctua-tion), to this last year as co-Editor-in-Chief, my time here has helped me grow in ways

my scared, timid, first-year self never would have dreamed.

The best of all the great things about The Strand is the people, though. The staff of The Strand, despite evolving and chang-ing during my time here, has been my sec-ond family and a home away from home. Thank you to Amanda Ghazale Aziz, whose stories of her experiences as an Editorial As-sistant at The Strand throughout our first year moved me to apply for Editorial Assis-tant in our second. More importantly, if she had not vouched for my abilities following that application, I would not be where I am today. Thank you also to Paula Razuri, who has been a wonderful mentor and a source of infinite wisdom for the past three years. Thank you to Emily Pollock, whose end-less hard work on the design of the paper has quite often been the only thing that got new issues out on time and prevented all of us from spiraling into a fiery pit of despair.

Thank you to our section editors, copy edi-tors, and contributors, who constantly turn out amazing content and make sure the paper always looks sharp. Thank you to ev-eryone who reads this eclectic rag week after week—we do it all for you.

And thank you to Anthony and Holly. I couldn’t have picked two better people to go on this wild journey with; working along-side you on the EIC team this year has been incredibly fulfilling and has taught me a lot. As much as our time together has been chal-lenging—full of steep learning curves, late-night production delirium, and moments where it seemed impossible that we’d be able to figure it all out—I’m really proud of what we were able to accomplish this year. You’re both amazing, talented people, and I can’t wait to see what you go on to achieve.

To our incoming masthead, I know you’ll do an amazing job. Thank you in advance for the dedication, hard work, and

passion I know you will put into your roles, just as this year’s masthead did before you. The Strand couldn’t have asked for a better group of people to inherit it. As hard as it is to say goodbye to this amazing chapter of my life, I can leave with a smile knowing the paper is in your capable hands.

Apologies for being so cliché and su-per, duper sappy, but it’s hard not to be. My entire university experience has been transformed by my involvement with The Strand, and although, like any experience, it has been a mixture of good and bad things, it’s impossible not to look back on it fondly.

If you’re reading this and happen to be looking for a fun, fulfilling, transformative way to spend an alarming chunk of your time at university, I can’t recommend The Strand more highly.

100% Sap (I Just Love You All So Much)Rhianna Jackson-Kelso | Editor-in-Chief (Outgoing)

1. Death by Clickbait2. Borat3. Drake4. Paul Blart: Mall Cop5. DuckTales6. Tables7. What’s up with politics???!??!8. Ted Cruz = Zodiac9. Questions10. Magic ( ^-^)*^*~~11. The Strand: ASMR12. The Strand: TV Show

13. The Strand In Cyberspace14. The 1990s15. The 1590s16. The 1X90s/90s17. Old Hollywood Glamour18. Gatsby Party19. Dad Jokes20. Wild Wild West (Will Smith)21. Bees???22. Nihilism23. Enchantment Under The Sea

23 Rejected Theme Ideas for this Issue of The StrandNumber 6 will shock you!

Stranded • The Strand

8

This article is obviously a joke seeing as it’s in the joke issue, but on a serious note if anyone knows some stuff about the UTSU election my Twitter handle is @neilmsy. Tweet at me, and also my Facebook name is Neil McKenzie-Sutter, same spelling as my name at the top of this article. Or email me, neilmsbest@gmail.com, whatever you prefer to use, because I guess this is also a challenge to myself, and to the UofT student commu-nity, to see if anyone understands anything about this stuff. I mean elections shit. I’ve been a student here for five years and I don’t understand anything. It’s kind of too late for it to matter, for me anyways, but I guess I was just sort of interested to know.

A few weeks ago I tried watching the

live stream of the UTSU debate, but that crashed less than halfway through. Also dur-ing the debate I tried researching some of the candidates, but the website for the second major party—the 1UofT party, I think?—yeah, their website also wasn’t working. So the only really solid information I have is for the UTSU establishment party. Also from what I understand, in addition to the two parties, there are several significant inde-pendent candidates. Does anyone have any information/know where to get information about those dudes?

Also something that I found interesting is that after the stream crashed out, I went to the VUSAC office to see if anyone there knew anything about the election. I’m aware

VUSAC is not completely the same thing as UTSU, but it’s still politics, right? I just fig-ured maybe someone there had an interest in following UofT student politics or whatever.

The thing was there was only one guy in the office and he explained that he wasn’t allowed to talk about the elections.

What the heck?I mean, no offence to the VUSAC or

the dude I talked to, but that’s kind of an odd rule I think.

So if anyone has any information about the election that’d be sweet and you should hit me up—about any of the stuff I’ve men-tioned earlier in this piece, but also what is the point of participating in the elections? I thought the reason for the UTSU to exist

was to sort of communicate with the school or the different colleges on the students’ be-half, but is that even correct? Why does the UTSU exist?

Also, you vote in your ROSI account, right? Someone told me that, although I don’t remember who. I’m asking because I checked that out and I don’t see the op-tion for that anywhere. Also, what’s the date when we’re supposed to vote on that? I mean the UTSU.

Yeah, if anyone knows any of that stuff that’d be sweet.

The Strand Staff | The Lifeblood of The Strand

Woman discovers WEIRD OLD TRICK to lose $20,000!

Send me a DM if you know anything about the UTSU Neil McKenzie-Sutter | Confused Citizen

Stranded • The Strand

9

Professors hate her!

Local Woman Never Goes To Class Or Does Readings!

Which Strand EIC are YOU?TAKE THE QUIZ:

What do you think of Drake?a) If I hear one more word about Drake in relation to this godforsaken newspaper, SO HELP ME I WILLb) <3 himc) You see, I think that Drake is a pretty good litmus test for where trends in music are in any given year. He’s very astute, very calculated – look at last summer’s release of Hotline Bling. What people neglect to mention is the ……..

Thoughts on Hawaiian pizza?a) !!! Love it !!!b) It is an abominationc) Pineapples belong on everything but pizza

How do you cope with stress?a) Sleeping, like, a LOTb) Idk/Staring into the voidc) Chain smoking

Fave colour?a) Floralsb) Plaidc) Black

Fave outfit?a) Snuggie (pink, backwards) and footie pajamasb) Plaidc) [Intentionally left blank]

Which meme do you relate to the most?a) Dog w/ hat in flaming room (“This is fine.”)b) Jaden Smithc) The “I smell like beef ” baby

Fave Final Destination movie?a) Final Destination Too: 2 Many Final Destinationsb) The Muppets Christmas Carolc) The one where Aeris dies

Fave war?a) The one that is not in Ba Sing Seb) The Battle of Helm’s Deepc) The War on Christmas

Senior quote?a) Fuk dis shit, I’m out/Ollie outieb) U rock don’t ever changec) I am here to assert Eternal Provi-dence and justify the ways of God to men

Dream job?a) YouTube starb) Twitter starc) Vine star

Fav student paper?a) The Gargb) Tiger Beatc) The lyric book to the latest Semio-tones album

Fave Shoppers Drug Mart location?a) Yonge & Charlesb) College Streetc) Bloor & Bedford

How do you spend a lazy Sunday?a) Sleeping, like, a LOTb) Slothingc) Cookin’ Brussels sprouts and bumpin’ some U2 in my underwear

Which sleep-deprived, barely-functioning member of society are YOU most like?Ariana Douglas | Supreme Meme Queen

VICTORIA COLLEGE:we’re less smug and “establishment” than Trinity!*

* or at least we think we are

If you answered…

MOSTLY ‘A’: Rhianna Jackson-Kelso and you would get along!MOSTLY ‘B’: Holly McKenzie-Sutter is your new best friend!MOSTLY ‘C’: Anthony Burton’s the friend for you!

10

Stephanie Spagnuolo | Contributor

What’s in a Name?Why we need to change the

Ryerson Stream name

Illustration | Seolim Hong

Features • The Strand

11

Names matter, regardless of what Juliet might think—a One program stream name reflects the underlying ideals of the program itself. Since the intro-duction of the One programs, a principle was founded in es-tablishing opportunities for first year students to thought-fully engage in small class-size discussions to explore the in-ter-connectivity of academic streams. This academic oppor-tunity pushes the boundaries of learning beyond the tradi-tional authoritarian school set-ting, and this is exactly what the Egerton Ryerson Vic One stream encourages. The Ryer-son stream caters to students who have found their vocation in the teaching profession. The stream itself invites students to critically deconstruct the role that education should play in society, and how that dif-fers from the role it currently plays. This stream, despite its notoriously small numbers and often-overshadowed presence among larger branches of Vic One, has succeeded in creating students with perspectives that challenge the norm. Many of my classmates and I have grown to deconstruct the problem of our stream’s name, and situate that in the context of what the stream is compliant with and what students can learn from it. A re-naming of the Ryer-son stream is not only some-thing that the students within the courses themselves demand; it will also undoubtedly bet-ter the stream by perpetuating values that enhance rather than contradict the ethical and equi-table principles that an effective teacher must embody.

Egerton Ryerson seems like an acceptable name for a teach-ing stream. At face value, much like Ryerson himself, it appears to be seated firmly on the right side of history. Yet this con-tradicts the principles of the teaching stream itself; requir-ing young minds to think be-yond face value. (Speaking of principles, Ryerson was the first principal of Victoria College in 1836.) In hindsight, it seems fitting to have such an accom-plished man heading a College founded on colonialism and seated on stolen land: like a lot of historical men with dubious pasts, Ontarians undoubtedly owe a lot to Ryerson. He was the founder of the free and compul-sory public education system, laying the groundwork for the system of which we are a part. He even established the first Ontario “Normal School”—an-other horrible name—which is an institute for training young teachers. This name was right-fully changed to “Teacher’s Col-lege.” His personal and, at the time, socially acceptable, beliefs

filtered into his own instructing of teachers, where he applied sexist expectations, particularly for female teachers.

His teaching style, which was also widely accepted at the time, is described in education today as traditionalist and au-thoritarian. His pedagogy was that people needed “to learn in order to practice.” He consid-ered education to be the first stepping-stone to prepare young workers. In the course reader of VIC151: Theories and Practices of Teaching, a required course in the Ryerson stream, Egerton Ryerson’s teaching principles are described as “very strict.” He favoured heavy discipline; a

r e a d i n g quotes him as saying, “Humans have bad habits and tendencies that need to be cor-rected/need constant supervi-sion.” Although this education style is described as “tradition-al” because of the time in which it was developed, this is no rea-son to enshrine one of its pro-ponents in the stream’s name. The stream’s values urge young teachers to evolve from this teaching style into one consist-ing of more holistic, progres-sive, and socially reconstructive pedagogies.

The teaching profession it-self is in need of serious reform. Through the rise of technology, teachers will need to adapt to a pedagogy that does more than just prepare their students for the workforce. Rather, teachers must engage the whole person in a holistic venture for growth and motivation for social jus-tice. Although this basic prin-ciple echoes throughout the

stream’s courses, it is clear that the Ryerson name is contra-dictory to the purpose of the stream.

The fact that this stream is named after Ryerson is actually rather embarrassing. Ryerson worked to establish a system of education that separated and differed between White stu-dents and Aboriginal children. He considered Aboriginal peo-ples to be part of an inferior cul-ture—one that needed a strict education that was Christian-focused and centered on assimi-lation. His ideas are showcased in a study he authored in 1847

for the Department of In-dian Affairs, outlin-

ing his sugges-

tions for “ I n d u s t r i a l

Schools for the benefit of the Aborigi-

nal Indian tribes.” This report was used as a blueprint for Ab-original Residential Schools, probably one of the most hor-rifying and shameful acts of Canada’s past. The effects of this cultural genocide are still ever-present for First Nations, Métis, and Inuit people today.

In 1847, Ryerson’s wrote, “It is a fact established by nu-merous experiments, that the North American Indian cannot be civilized or preserved in a state of civilization.” This despi-cable statement, though a com-mon perspective for the time period itself, is one we today have the power and responsibil-ity to recognize and reconcile. Carmen Russo, a 2015-2016 Ryerson stream student, voic-es this concern, saying, “I be-lieve that this Vic One stream is about recognizing oppression and exclusion in our society, es-

pecially in schools, and having the stream named after some-one who supported the creation of residential schools, a system that oppressed so many First Nations people, sets the stream back in its ability to foster so-cial change.” Her sentiment is remarkably supported and af-firmed by most of the stream students this year, despite Ry-erson not being mentioned in the course required readings on Residential Schools.

These schools were not meant to be educative, and as future teachers, it is so impor-tant to acknowledge the role the education system played in this cultural genocide. It is clear to see that Ryerson showed no em-pathy in his views and decisions, whereas the study and practices of empathy are a core compo-nent of the stream’s course con-tent. Further, Ryerson’s actions go unacknowledged because Ry-erson stream students are never required to take any Indigenous Study courses as a co-requisite, and because this aspect of his history goes unmentioned on the Victoria College Ryerson Stream webpage detailing the stream, application, and name-sake. Even Ryerson University at least recognizes his contribu-tions to the oppression of Ab-original peoples on their web-page, and makes a commitment to “build and maintain a cam-pus environment that welcomes and respects Aboriginal people.” Perhaps our stream’s deliberate avoidance of this hidden his-tory is indicative of how shame-ful Ryerson’s name really is to an education stream. If it’s not something to be ashamed of, why not mention it, or at least acknowledge the harm he took part in causing?

Imagine a young Indig-enous student with an inter-est in teaching applying for an education stream. The stream promises to help shape them as a progressive, passionate, and responsible educator—and then they see the title, the namesake, the person who has heavily con-tributed to their own oppres-sion, and the continuous suf-fering of their people. They see that the namesake of the stream is a participant in a hidden his-tory of oppression. They do not see any acknowledgment or at-tempt at reconciliation for the pain in which the namesake took part, not in the online description on the application, nor in the stream’s short biogra-phy of them. Every day they are continually oppressed, their his-tory continually denied. Those wanting to be an educator to actually educate rather than per-petuate a victor’s curriculum—this is the name of the stream they come to. They do not feel welcome. Should you?

Perhaps our stream’s

deliberate avoidance of

this hidden history is in-

dicative of how shameful

Ryerson’s name really is

to an education stream.

Film & Music • The Strand

12

On March 24, the TIFF Bell Lightbox held an advance screening of Richard Linklater’s newest film, entitled Every-body Wants Some. Linklater was present for a discussion on his career before introducing the film, and I was lucky enough to be in attendance.

Set in 1980, Everybody Wants Some follows baseball player Jake Bradford (Blake Jenner) during his first weekend as a freshman at a Texas college. Upon arriving at school, Jake meets his fellow teammates, who are also the people he will be rooming with for the duration of his college career.

The film was presented by Linklat-er as a “cousin” to his 2014 film Boy-hood, and a “sequel” to his 1993 film Dazed and Confused, but this is diffi-cult to discern within the first 45 min-utes of the film. During this portion, the film mainly focuses on the group of guys as they attend discos and attempt to impress the women they meet. This

part is tiresome and, frankly, disap-pointing for a film written and direct-ed by Richard Linklater. Anyone who is familiar with his work knows that he is the most skilled at depicting small moments between characters, making them seem highly human. This is lack-ing within these first 45 minutes of Ev-erybody Wants Some, and the expected mix of relatable characters are replaced with a group of guys who play baseball and objectify women. Practically every woman who appears onscreen sim-ply exists to be sexualised by the male characters. Dazed and Confused fea-tured similarly chauvinistic males, ex-cept that film had a balanced ensemble cast of both men and women—women who were more than bodies. It’s impor-tant to note that Everybody Wants Some is based off of Linklater’s own experi-ences as a baseball player in college, so its perspective is authentic, but it’s still missing a balance of diverse characters.

As the film progresses, however, the group of characters become just as likeable as those in Linklater’s past films. On the surface, the group of col-lege baseball players in Everybody Wants Some are nearly interchangeable with the “frat boy” characters of any main-stream film, but below this, they are true Linklater characters. They have depth, and seem less like stereotypes and more like real people. The charac-ters articulate worries that are relatable to any young person entering adult-hood. This became increasingly no-ticeable during the second half of the film, especially through the relation-ships that developed within the group. With a larger amount of scenes that only show a few characters speaking to-gether, rather than the entire group in a party setting, Linklater provides the viewer with a deeper understanding of each character. This allows for the ab-sence of specific characters to matter,

and actually be noticed. Furthermore, the relationship that develops between Jake and Beverly (Zoey Deutch), a the-atre major who lives on campus, reflects exchanges similar to those between Jesse and Céline in Linklater’s Before trilogy, and makes up for the poor representation of women in the earlier portion of the film. Everybody Wants Some, much like Linklater’s other films, does not follow a formulaic structure. His films are sustained by genuine rep-resentations of relationships, and it was a relief to see this come through by the film’s conclusion.

Everybody Wants Some definitely does not pass the Bechdel Test, but it is still a highly enjoyable film—particu-larly if you are a fan of Richard Lin-klater’s previous work.

Review: Everybody Wants SomeSabrina Papas | Staff Copy Editor

On April 6, Vic Records hosted its first-ever live recorded open mic, as a part of their “Studio Sessions” series. The event featured live performances from the musicians and bands in the Vic community. It was fairly standard for a Cat’s Eye event: Caffiends ca-tering, plenty of refreshments, and a packed room. As opposed to the usual open mic fare, however, the event had a twist: the live performances were re-corded, to be released as part of a new initiative for Vic Records.

The event capped off a year of growth for a club that has been rela-tively inactive for the last three years. The last time the club released any-thing was in 2010-2011, when they released a limited-run compilation of original recordings by Vic artists. This compilation includes a rendition

of “The Old Ontario Strand,” Victoria College’s original rallying song, a sort of proto-Frosh chant from the past.

But for years after that, without an executive team or a clear mandate, the club’s status was in limbo. This year’s open mic, along with production workshops and DJ-ing Vic events, helped raise the club’s profile and in-tegrate it more with the Vic commu-nity. But it hasn’t been an easy road to visibility.

“We spent a lot of time this year trying to figure out exactly what Vic Records means to the community,” club executive Aaron Rambhajan said in an interview. “We started the year focused on workshops, but the turn-out wasn’t really what we wanted it to be. So we took a while to try and fig-ure out where we can fit in at Vic.”

This year, the club’s initial goal was to hold production workshops to teach Vic students how to use a va-riety of audio engineering tools and equipment.

But with attendance at these workshops lagging, the club decided to reorient its approach.

“I was like, wow, we might be a lit-tle too purist about this,” Rambhajan remembered thinking after another workshop with low attendance. “We were understanding this music club in a certain way, which isn’t how other people [were] understanding it.”

Charlène Hanania, another mem-ber of the club, joined after attending one of the workshops with the idea that something different could be done. “I was like, you guys should be reaching out to the community more,”

she said in an interview. “Music is a platform that a lot of people love, but they don’t really know how to engage with a greater community of it.”

With the success of the open mic, the club hopes to host more in the future as well as expand the ways it can help musicians at Vic. Hanania outlined plans for a series of song-writing workshops, recordings (the club has recorded audio for the Hart House Jazz Ensemble and will soon be recording for some of the artists featured in the open mic), and more community events to bring musicians together under one roof.

“When people get together around music, it always turns out well,” Hana-nia said. “That’s what we want to help people do.”

Studio Sessions Open Mic caps off year of growthAnthony Burton | Editor-in-Chief

Vic Records’s first live recording open mic sets the stage for the club’s future

Majid Jordan, the eponymous debut al-bum from Toronto duo Majid Al Mas-kati and Jordan Ullman, is a nighttime cityscape with its dark, warm, atmo-spheres interjected by hovering build-ings and their glow. The record is a veri-table mood, stylistically borne of 808s & Heartbreak by Kanye West and House of Balloons by The Weeknd, using their elements to create a bona fide dance re-cord. Majid Jordan succeed most when they embrace their dance inclinations, perpetuating the physicality of sound, but fail hardest when they become pop. Their failure to reconcile their main-stream inclinations and authenticity is symptomatic of a new agenda—audi-ence—and is ultimately what defines this album.

Their vocabulary consists of round, sub-bass kick drums; airy, rippling snares; and atmospheric, tactile instru-

ments, all of which come together to make the contrasting architecture that defines the mood of Majid Jordan. Be-ing left to their own wits, the album was a commercial failure—this was their first substantial work unattached to OVO Sound label-head Drake, and their inability to define their audi-ence ultimately inundates them. Their lack of a singular audience facilitates instances where they desperately call upon disingenuous pop theatre (“Paci-fico”), and in others effortlessly suc-ceed with their own off-kilter, spa-tially-subversive styles (“Every Step Every Way”). The album’s dead weight speaks to the internalised war between the mainstream style and their own in the excessive, questionable percussion of “Shake Shake Shake,” and the long-ing-but-preachy vocals of “King City.” “Shake Shake Shake” feels like a cheap

rework of “Pacifico” which feels like a cheap rework of the preceding “Small Talk,” making for a mundane, repetitive stretch of songs. Not so brilliant. It’s a confusing phenomenon as they demon-strated masterful cohesion on their first EP A Place Like This, but lose it so pro-foundly in the aforementioned songs.

The style they’ve adopted is one that has proliferated in recent years, an R&B-driven pop that fights atmosphere and tactility. It’s a style that has afford-ed both the singer and the producer a voice, and Majid Jordan’s prowess has been their attention to every mil-lisecond of sound. Their innovation is found within an ability to turn spatial juxtaposition into dialogue, which is ul-timately the key to great dance music. They engage their brilliance on massive successes like “Learn From Each Oth-er,” which sees producer and vocalist in

conversation, responding and reacting. In cuts like “Something About You,” and “Every Step Every Way,” they really toy with space and texture—the sounds are ephemeral, elusive, and positioned such that they never to give too much, but remain suggestive to listeners. They follow similarly on “Warm,” making disillusioning contrasts of space with haunting melody. The highlights of the album are intensely clever and laden with groove, and their use of the spatial juxtaposition—the fluid atmosphere of instruments, the interjection of per-cussion—is ultimately what makes this a physical dance record. However, its core brilliance is besieged by a conflict-ing desire to reach to an audience that isn’t theirs, becoming incredibly frus-trating as they reduce their potential to a whisper.

Conflicts of Space: A review of Majid Jordan’s self-titled albumAaron Rambhajan | Contributor

Arts & Culture • The Strand

A closer look inside UofT’s Visual Arts Department

13

When we think about a visual arts educa-tion in Toronto, UofT may not be the first school that comes to mind. Other schools like the Ontario College of Art and Design (OCAD), or even Ryerson and York, may be first in line for students looking to pur-sue an education in the visual arts. However, this isn’t to say that UofT doesn’t have some-thing of artistic note to offer.

One of the University of Toronto’s best-kept secrets is the Visual Arts faculty, a small nook hidden within the John H. Daniels Faculty of Architecture, Landscape, and Design. On the Daniels website, a separate tab indicating “Visual Studies @Daniels” is the only portal of information about the program. Offering an innovative Honours Bachelor of Arts program for undergrads and a Masters in Visual Arts for graduate students, the faculty aims to provide “in-struction in studio practice, combined with critical discourse involving all aspects of con-temporary visual culture, through lectures, seminars, and field trips.”

The visual arts program, which used to be part of Arts and Science, transferred to Daniels in 2013. This change came with its share of pros and cons, as the Arts and Sci-ence Department receives more funding,

but Daniels is more suited to the creative endeavours of visual arts students. Profes-sor Lisa Steele, who has been a part of the Visual Arts Faculty since 2001, suggests that the transfer has made an impact in a very positive way, allowing for smaller classes and a greater sensitivity to the importance of stu-dio-based teaching. According to Professor Steele, the support and resources provided by the university recognise the value of the program, and the communication is favour-able between both the Arts and Science Fac-ulty and the John H. Daniels faculty.

Professor Steele, who also used to work at OCAD, maintains that the UofT pro-gram has a lot to offer to visual arts students who would prefer to study in a more “aca-demic environment.” The program has be-gun accepting students in a “direct entry” approach, meaning students can be admit-ted directly from high school. The program offers the possibility of taking other, non-visual arts programs at the same time, and the degree obtained at the end of under-grad is a Bachelor of Arts, as opposed to the Bachelor of Fine Arts provided by most art schools. This gives flexibility to students in their future undertakings, as they can pursue other graduate degrees that aren’t necessarily

within the fine arts. Unfortunately, the small size of the Vi-

sual Arts Faculty has made it almost invis-ible to the rest of the student body. But this doesn’t mean that they can’t get involved. For instance, students interested in minor-ing in visual arts can do so, and all it takes is four VIS credits. Professor Steele mentions: “The students bring into the [visual arts] classroom whatever else they are doing in more academic classes. This is what makes the UofT Visual Arts Faculty interesting compared to other schools.” For students who just want to appreciate the art on cam-pus, there are fourth year thesis exhibitions every April and a huge diversity of media all around campus.

We asked Blair Swann, a recent gradu-ate of the visual arts program, to answer a few questions on his experience with the faculty. The Strand: Can you give an example of a visual studies course you took? What medium(s) did you work in?

Blair Swann: The VIS program is very inter-disciplinary. The program really pushes you to take a variety of classes and explore dif-

ferent media. I took classes in photography, installation, video, and performance. There are introductory classes starting in 200-level to each for a specific medium, followed by more intensive and focused classes in the years after that.

Has the art department’s separation from the Faculty of Arts and Science impacted your studies in any way?

I was in the VIS program during the tran-sition from Arts and Science to Daniels. Before, we were in the stunning 1 Spadina building, which really laid down a back-ground for the classes in a way. Then the next year we were in the Borden Buildings, which are, ahem, quite different. The physi-cal change is definitely what stood out to my friends and I during the [move]. A lot of us elected not to move faculties out of fear of the bureaucratic nightmare that would be. Is it different a few years after? The program is still in the Borden Buildings. When the time comes that 1 Spadina is all shiny, bright, new, and renovated, will there be room for the VIS program? Or will we be watching from across the street from our corner of the faculty?

In your experience, does the visual arts program at UofT lack funding from the University?

Yes. It’s a small program—and many of its benefits come from that fact—but side by side with other fine art programs in the city, even its spiritual neighbor at UTSC, it pales in comparison in terms of facilities and ex-hibition opportunities. There isn’t even a permanent student-run gallery for showing work—who can say that about any other university’s fine art program?

Would you recommend UofT to someone looking to study visual arts?

I would, yes. I loved my time there. You just need to be aware of its specific personality, and hold it up to other schools and what you yourself are looking for in a program. It’s small—but intimate connections and true criticism from professors comes out of that. It doesn’t have a lot of facilities com-pared to other schools—but it leans on a strong conceptual foundation that builds up skills in writing about and criticizing your own work.

Elena Senechal-Becker | Arts & Culture Editor

Photos | UofT Visual Studies Department

Opinions • The Strand

14

Modern audiences aren’t used to many rules around attending mov-ies, but they used to be much more common. When Alfred Hitchcock’s film Psycho was being advertised, Hitchcock made it clear that no one would be allowed to enter the theatre after the show had started. To emphasize the late policy, adver-tisements for the film said, “Surely you don’t have your meat course af-ter your dessert at dinner.” Another important aspect from the adver-tisements was, “If you can’t keep a secret, please stay away from people after you see Psycho.”

Today, I think most of us would think this idea is silly. People walk in late to the theatre, bringing in popcorn and drinks from the busy line-ups. I remember going to watch a film from the Paranormal Ac-tivity series, and people kept going in and out of the theatre dur-ing the movie. They didn’t to-tally ruin my ex-perience, but I

Things come up that force you to leave the theatre. Maybe you need to use the washroom, or maybe you get an im-portant call. It’s not good to be late for anything, but I think when it comes to going to the movies, peo-ple think it’s not a big deal to walk in a couple minutes late or leave during the show. You may think to yourself, “After all, it is just a mov-ie. You are not losing anything by missing the beginning or the middle of Paranormal Activity, or any other movie.” However, that is not the point.

Hitchcock didn’t have strict rules about punctuality for just any movie. Psycho was significant (if you haven’t seen it, I don’t want to ruin the surprise for you). He wanted to make sure audiences were up-to-date on the story; if you walked in late, chances are you would be lost for the entire film. You can, on the other hand, walk in late or leave during many films that lack story without being negatively affected by what you missed. For example, con-sider Steven Spielberg’s Duel. The entire film is about David Mann (Dennis Weaver), the protagonist, being chased by a truck driver. If you walked in late during Duel, you

would have only missed more of the chase scenes.

However, walking in late or getting up

and leaving dur-ing a film such as The Sixth Sense would have ruined the experience; you might have missed the

scene when Mal-colm (Bruce Wil-

lis) gets shot, and then is seen lying on

the bed. After this is a time jump to “the next fall.”

If you left during the film, you could have missed the scene in which Cole (Haley Osment) reveals his secret to Malcolm: that he sees dead people. These scenes are important, as all of these elements tie together at the end of the film.

Walking in late to the theatre for a movie defeats the purpose of going to the movies. Of course, people go to the movies to have a good time, but we all need to come to appreciate the film from start to finish. When you go to the movies,

you make a commitment to yourself to sit and watch the film from start to finish without any distractions. When you watch movies on Netflix or on your laptop, you can pause or rewind to make sure you get all the details you may have missed, but at the movies you don’t get that op-portunity. That is what makes going to the movies special.

Remember that, for many of us, the film will always be just a mov-ie, but to a director, it’s something more than that. They want to make

sure you get what you paid for, es-pecially if there is something unique like mystery, suspense, surprise, or fear.

If filmmakers today feel that they must use Hitchcock’s strict late policy to make sure people get what they paid for, it would still make sense to do so. Don’t wait for the se-crets to be spoiled when you can be on time and see them for yourself.

Come to the movies, just be on timeHarpreet Chohan | Contributor

Of course, people go to the movies to have

a good time, but we all need to come to ap-

preciate the film from start to finish.

Illustration | The Hitchcock Zone

Illustration | Seolim Hong

On Friday night, VUSAC held its final meeting of the 2015-2016 school year. Following an election season plagued by poor turnout, VUSAC’s constitution required both the new VUSAC board and several referenda to be ratified by the existing council. The VUSAC con-stitution requires a 15 percent VCU turnout for elections, and a 10 percent turnout for referenda, for the results to be considered binding. Neither of these thresholds were met in the election.

The VUSAC office was packed with nearly 40 people, as incoming and outgoing levy heads gathered for ratification of their successors and to argue for the ratification of the refer-endum to increase levy funds in line with the Consumer Price Index. Levy funds have not increased in over ten years, necessitating that almost every

levy fund use most of their budgets to cover fixed costs. Some levies, such as Acta Victoriana, have gone over budget this school year as a result.

For example, in previous years, The Strand has been able to print 4,000 copies of each issue, a figure that has now been reduced to 1,800 due to bud-get constraints. Allowing the levy fund to increase with the Consumer Price Index would allow for an increase with inflation, allowing for budgets to re-main at a constant level.

A lengthy debate surrounding the validity of the referenda results ensued as a result of a turnout below the 10 percent threshold. The VUSAC consti-tution states that in a case such as this, the results “may not necessarily be con-sidered binding by the VUSAC, upon the discretion of the council.”

Outgoing Chief Returning Officer Saambavi Mano and Vice-President Ex-ternal Alex Martinborough argued for a literal interpretation of the constitu-tion, saying that it is not the Council’s discretion to make referenda decisions on behalf of the VCU if the 10 percent threshold isn’t met. They insisted that the decision be delayed until another referendum can be held during the fall election cycle.

Other VUSAC members, such as outgoing Co-President Gabriel Zoltan-Johan and Councillor Carl Abraha-msen, argued that, despite the low turnout, granting this funding increase would only serve to benefit the student body, and that any further delay would not benefit levies or VUSAC. Abraha-msen pointed out that the wording of the constitution indicated that it was

up to Council to deem the results not binding, and doing so would only fur-ther the conception that VUSAC is stuck in the “Vic bubble.”

A further referendum held in the recently finished election cycle was to allow VISA, the Victoria International Students Association, to become a levy. It was argued by VISA Co-Presidents Satoko Nakamoto and Maiko Mit-suhashi that allowing the group to become a levy, and the benefits that would come with that designation, would allow for greater accessibility and involvement of international stu-dents in the Vic community.

All incoming levy heads were rati-fied, along with the various referenda in an omnibus format.

News • The Strand

15

VUSAC ratifies omnibus referenda, new levy heads at final meetingErik Preston | Editor-in-Chief

Erin Calhoun | News Editor

Online polls fight student democracywhere she clarified and updated vot-ers on the issues occurring and steps to resolution. In addition to the system destroying the referendum, it had also taken away the ability to choose more than one Board of Regents representa-tive, which did not allow for freedom of choice between all three candidates. The system also denied the start of a new election. Mano explained that VUSAC elections could continue until the end of the week, but there would have to be a separate election for the referendum and Board of Regents rep-resentatives.

The point of contact for solving the system errors at voting.utoronto.ca was missing until March 21, too long a period to delay the end of the elections. Because of the length of this

delay, Mano implemented a separation of voting, where the referendum and Board of Regents would be voted upon around the following Sunday or Mon-day.

Mano announced that Board of Regents and levy referendum results would be released on March 29. All three candidates, Benjamin Atkins, Hannah Brennan, and Chris Knipe, were elected to the Board.

Full election results can be found at http://www.vusac.ca/#!results/c1i9b.

On March 19, online voting polls opened for the VUSAC election, for students to elect new and returning members into council. Upon the first few hours of the online program run-ning, technical difficulties occurred and became problematic for students looking to place votes for the Board of Regents position, and the referendum.

Chief Returning Officer, Saamba-vi Mano, opened the polls for Victo-ria College students to vote for their chosen candidates at 12 AM on March 19. Only a few minutes later, Mano reported that the system had to be shut down to fix an error, and asked students to hold off casting votes for the time being. At 12:30 AM, students began to report that they were not see-ing the option to vote in the VUSAC

2016 election on the main page of vot-ing.utoronto.ca. Instead, the page only showed past elections that students were eligible to vote for.

Online voting system opera-tions were stop and go until approxi-mately 1 AM. At 1:20 AM, Assistant Chief Returning Officer, Seraphina Vasilodimitrakis-Hart, stated in the VUSAC 2016 Elections Forum Face-book group, “There is a problem with the voting lists that we received from voting.utoronto.ca. We’re trying to fix it right now. We’ll keep you updated as we fight the system.” Vasilodimitrakis-Hart then requested that those who had already voted cast their vote once again to validate it.

At 3:07 AM, Mano also posted on the Elections Forum Facebook page,

VICTORIA UNIVERSITY’S STUDENT NEWSPAPERVOLUME 58, ISSUE 12 - APRIL 12, 2016

what's in a name?

vic records open mic brings together the vic

musician community

PAGE 12

reel time:why punctuality is key

for the movies

PAGE 14

the strand reviews everybody wants some and

majid jordan

page 12

art in the academy a look at u of t's visual studies program Page 13

the case for changing the name of Vic one's egerton ryerson stream

Page 10

VIC STUDENT LIFE:

NEW FUNDING STRUCTURE FOR VIC CLUBS & LEVIES

ONLINE VOTING MALFUNCTIONS complicate VUSAC ELECTIONS

PAGE 15