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© Character Ed Tools

Lesson #1 What Is Honesty?

Honesty Workbook

10 Lessons

on

Honesty

Self-Control

10 Topics

30+ Lessons

on

Self-Control

Getting a Grip on Your Future

15709 Arrow Highway, #2 Irwindale, CA 91706

626-960-6922 www.characteredtools.com [email protected]

Building a Foundation of Character

© 2011 Character Ed Tools All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form

without written permission from the publisher, with the exception of materials designed to be copied for individual classroom use.

Character Ed Tools

Character Ed Tools’ Vision

Empowering students to stand on a foundation of character so they may act responsibly when faced with difficult decisions.


Self-Control

Table of Contents

How To Use This Self-Control Program

Daily Reflections On Self-Control

Lesson #1 ……….What is Self-Control?

Lesson #2 ……….Take Control of Your Health

Lesson #3 ……….Self-Control with Money

Lesson #4 ……….Taking Control of Time

Lesson #5 ……….Anger Management

Lesson #6 ……….Self-Control at School

Lesson #7 ……….Self-Control at Home

Lesson #8 ……….Self-Control with the Bully

Lesson #9 ……….Self-Control in the Environment

Lesson #10 ………Self-Control in the Community

How To Use This Character Ed Tools Program

Overview Too often we view self-control as the ability to avoid certain pitfalls in life. We perceive self-control as one’s ability to exercise “will power,” to control urges and desires that may have a negative effect on our lives. Self-control then becomes synonymous with missing out on some type of fun or delicious but fattening food. However, lacking self-control brings about feelings of depression, frustration, and anger. This self-control program is designed to help students recognize that self-control is more than that. It is the driving force in our lives that helps us achieve our goals and dreams. It represents taking control over one’s life, one’s destiny. This program will help students learn how to exercise self-control when they are in a bullying situation, confronted with negative influences, or when they experience feelings of frustration or anger. Students will discover the benefits of self-control and how they can apply it to their daily lives. This program will explore several aspects of self-control, helping students to consider changing and taking control of their futures. A lack of self-control can lead to addictions, health problems, and failure. Those with self-control have the ability to do the work necessary to excel and improve who they are. They move forward in life with a determination to achieve a goal despite the distractions and temptations of the world around them. This self-control program will motivate your students to take control of their lives. Students will develop skills to overcome peer pressure and feel empowered to say “no” to things like smoking, alcohol, and drugs. This program will encourage students to control their impulses and recognize that self-control isn’t about denying themselves of something enjoyable or missing out on some type of fun, it’s about taking control of their lives in an effort to shape and control their futures. Daily Reflections On Self-Control We have provided you with an opening comment on each lesson. Our vision is for the entire school to participate in learning more about self-control. With that in mind, we wrote these daily reflections on self-control as witty statements that could be given during your school’s morning announcements for ten days. If it is only your class going through this book, a great way to reinforce the messages on self-control is to begin or end your class period reading these daily statements. Also, these reflections could be used as a reminder for the students weeks after you’ve ended your lessons on self-control. Remember, we move in the direction of our dominant thoughts. Let’s make self-control one of those dominant thoughts. It is the driving force that motivates us to forgo short term pleasure to gain long term happiness.


Lessons 1 Through 10

Each lesson is loaded with insights and thoughts to get your students talking for hours on end about self-control. Okay, maybe we’re exaggerating a bit, but this will get your students talking.

Activities This program contains simple and yet creative activities for each lesson. Use as many of these ideas as time or resources permit. Our goal is simply to get your students talking, thinking, and acting on what they think and have learned about self-control.

The Lessons

Each lesson is packed with thought-provoking content to get your students talking. An interesting comment is followed by open class discussion. We think you’ll find it fun to see what your students think self-control means and how getting a grip on their lives can help them achieve their goals and dreams. Tip for the teacher: Please remember that calling on students to verbally respond to any question from this program puts that student on the spot. The resulting tension can lead to a rushed response, a wild guess, or simply no response at all. Please give students 10-15 seconds between asking a question and asking a student to respond. This gives them time to formulate an answer. Help each student feel involved and encourage the others to practice good citizenship when listening to other students’ responses. Biographies, Historical Data, and Poems We thought you could use some real examples of people, historical events, and poems that demonstrate self-control in different ways. With each lesson you’ll find a whole bunch of data on a real person, an event, or a poem that demonstrates self-control.

Worksheets Several worksheets are provided for each lesson to get your students’ feedback as they reflect on what they have learned.

Some Legal Thoughts

Copyrights and all that jazz. You know the drill. These lessons are owned by Character Ed Tools, so don’t copy them. How fair would it be if you copied any of these lessons without permission? If you want more books or a license to use this program school-wide, just give us a yell, we’ve got solutions. But when it comes to those worksheets? Copy tons of the worksheets (well, perhaps not tons since we are supposed to be saving trees, but you get the idea). Let’s get those students writing and reflecting on what they have learned. And most important of all, let’s have fun learning about self-control!


Daily Reflections On Self-Control LESSON 1: WHAT IS SELF-CONTROL?

Plato, a famous ancient philosopher, once said, “The first and best victory is to conquer self.” Taking control of your thoughts and actions will be a lifelong effort that is easier to accomplish when you spend time daily working on it. A strong ability to make the right decisions concerning how you express your emotions and the impulses you choose to act on is critical to the success and happiness you’ll experience later in life.

LESSON 2: TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR HEALTH A single penny isn’t a lot of money but several million of them when added together become quite valuable. Likewise, your health is dependent on a series of choices made over several years. One poor decision may or may not ruin your life but when added together those decisions impact your over-all health. And just like picking up a penny here and a penny there can start to build a huge pile of money, how you choose to live each second makes a huge difference when all those seconds are added together. So come on, live smart and think healthy. The small choices you make today could pay off big time in the tomorrow you live in.

LESSON 3: SELF-CONTROL WITH MONEY Everyone has heard the saying, “A penny saved is a penny earned.” That’s good advice, but it’s not easy to save those pennies, is it? This isn’t anything new. Thomas Tusser, a 16th Century English poet, wrote, “a fool and his money are soon parted.” Holding onto money has been difficult for a lot of people for a lot of centuries. It takes self-control to think about what that money can do for you over the long haul. Next time you have a few bucks, consider what you’d do if you had three times that many dollars and then think about saving those dollars until you do.

LESSON 4: TAKING CONTROL OF TIME What does everyone have but can’t own? What can everyone use but not keep? What is something that can be lost or wasted but never returned? The answer is time. Steve Jobs of Apple computer said, “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.” Seize the day, live the moment, and make each action and thought count.

LESSON 5: ANGER MANAGEMENT

There is nothing wrong with being more emotional than those around you. However, it’s important to control how you express those emotions. And the emotion most likely to get you into trouble and most likely to be out of control is anger. Learning to control you anger may be challenging but it will help you become more successful in life. And a great way to gain control over your anger is to make this Bible proverb a significant part of your life: “Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.”


LESSON 6: SELF-CONTROL AT SCHOOL There are several valuable things you’ll learn at school that aren’t found in any textbooks. It comes from the schooling process. You see, going to school teaches you many skills that help you become successful in life. For example, getting homework completed on time, arriving at school in a timely manner, learning to interact with others in a positive way, and developing time management skills are a few of the important life lessons you’ll learn at school that will help you in the future. Or as author, H. Jackson Browne, Jr., once wrote, ”Talent without discipline is like an octopus on roller skates. There’s plenty of movement, but you never know if it’s going to be forward, backwards, or sideways.” Developing self-discipline helps you put that knowledge in your head to work so that you can create a better life for yourself.

LESSON 7: SELF-CONTROL AT HOME Aristotle once stated, “We are what we repeatedly do, excellence then is not an act, but a habit.” Let’s get out there and practice good character. Let’s consciously make a decision to force ourselves to respect others and make decisions that would benefit us all. Let’s practice these things at home, perfect them here at school, and develop the habit of good character.

LESSON 8: SELF-CONTROL WITH THE BULLY Bullying isn’t new. It’s been around since the dawn of time. There will always be those who feel it is necessary to be critical of you or your work. But don’t let that get to you. Those being critical feel a need to knock you down to build themselves up. However, those whose ideas and opinions that matter are the ones that cause you to excel. Mark Twain wrote about it this way, “Keep away from people who belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.” So don’t let little bullies keep you small. Dream BIG!

LESSON 9: SELF-CONTROL IN THE ENVIRONMENT

It’s easy to look around and see all the things others are doing that are harmful to the environment, but what about you? How are you doing at controlling your actions to help recycle, reduce, or reuse those things that you consume? Self-control is “self” control. It begins and ends with you. How well do you listen to that voice in your head telling you to think twice about what you are doing? W.K Hope writes, “Self-discipline is when your conscience tells you to do something and you don’t talk back.” The next time you feel the urge to litter because everyone else is doing it, think again. Listen to that voice inside telling you to do the “right” thing.

LESSON 10: SELF-CONTROL IN THE COMMUNITY

British psychologist, William McDougall said, “Willpower is character in action.” He goes on to declare

that “willpower” is the source of our actions and our actions declare our character. Therefore, our ability to control “self,” or “willpower” is then the source of our character. For when we exercise our willpower to do good, and do so, we have good character, but when we willfully choose to neglect our responsibilities, we have bad character. Let’s choose to develop our “willpower” to take action toward doing the good.


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What is Self-Control? Lesson #1

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Objective:

To get your students thinking and talking about what it means to exercise self-control.

Lesson:

This lesson takes a look at what self-control means to your students. It will spark discussion and motivate your students to consider the importance and benefits of exercising self-control.

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Set The Stage #1: What Does Self-Control Mean to You?

Activity: Time: 15 Minutes Materials: Box of Donuts Show the students a box of donuts. Talk about the various types of donuts in the box. Describe in detail the nature of the donuts and how delicious they will taste when consumed. Note how the students are responding. Some will be very excited about the donuts, some will only be slightly interested, and some won’t even want one. Talk about why the donuts entice some people but not everybody. Discuss why some must exercise self-control and why others do not need to when donuts are present. Where does self-control come from? What situations require more self-control than others? How do goals for your life, such as a desire to lose weight, alter the decisions you make?


Lesson #1 What is Self-Control?

Discussion: Why is it that one person can walk by a box of donuts without giving it a second thought while another is compelled to look, smell, and consume one or more of those donuts? Your ability to exercise self-control is challenged when you walk by something you desire. So why do some people have greater self-control at a moment such as that? Self-control seems to be the desire to control one’s decisions in an effort to achieve an alternate goal. Perhaps we are denying ourselves a donut in an effort to remain healthy. Or it might be that we observed the donuts and did not see one that was pleasing. Think about a time you gave in to a desire. Now consider a time you exercised self-control. What made the difference? Why did you choose restraint at one moment but not the other? What factors do you consider when choosing to exercise self-control? 1. A box of donuts may be challenging for some to pass up. Have the students

share various actions or activities that they struggle to control. Talk about why some activities, like the box of donuts, are easy for some to ignore while others have great difficulty with them.

2. Discuss the benefits for exercising self-control.

3. What pleasures might there be for not restraining our wants and desires? 4. Is it possible to develop stronger self-control? Why or why not?

“You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.” Brian Tracy—Motivational Speaker “Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” Benjamin Franklin



What Does Self-Control Mean to You? Lesson #1 – Worksheet for Stage #1

1) What does it mean to exercise self-control? 2) What motivates someone to exercise self-control? 3) What motivates someone to give in to a desire or lack self-control? 4) In which areas of your life do you struggle to maintain control? 5) Why is it important for you to learn better control of this area of life? This worksheet may be duplicated for educational purposes only. For more information regarding SELF-CONTROL or other Character Ed Tools programs please go to www.characteredtools.com or contact: Character Ed Tools, 15709 Arrow Hwy., Suite #2, Irwindale, CA 91706. (626) 960-6922. Character Ed Tools is a division of Camfel Productions, a non-profit company.


Set The Stage #2: Temptations

Activity: Time: 15 Minutes Materials: 10 Magazines Have the students look through magazines for advertisements. Have them share what the advertisement is attempting to sell and talk about how the words or images might be enticing the reader into making a decision that may not be wise. Advertising or marketing executives work hard to tempt readers or viewers to purchase their products. The goal is to break down your self-control, motivating you to make a quick decision for their benefit.

Discussion: Temptation is an act that looks appealing. It is usually something that allures, excites, or seduces. Temptations are all around you. Your ability to maintain self-control and make decisions that are right for you can be directly impacted by the temptations you encounter and the choices you make. It is a man’s own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways. Buddha Your self-control is constantly being challenged by the temptations around you. Advertising or marketing executives work hard to break down your restraints by enticing you to consume their products. Your friends might be the biggest source of temptation in your life as they persuade or pressure you to give in, indulge, or act a certain way. Self-control is the act of taking control of your life. It’s relying less on what others are presenting you or motivating you to do or think. It’s considering what is right for you, taking control of the decisions you make, looking past the enticements, and avoiding poor decisions. 1. Talk about how advertisers or marketing executives use enticing, seductive

or alluring words or images to tempt us into purchasing their products. 2. What should we do to look beyond the alluring words or images to make the

right decisions?



3. Talk about how people around us might be enticing us into making a poor decision and what we should do when we feel this is happening.

“What makes resisting temptation difficult for many people is they don't want to discourage it completely.” Franklin P. Jones

“I am, indeed, a king,

because I know how to rule myself.”

Pietro Aretino, 10 May 1537

“Most people want to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.” Robert Orben

“Do not bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it.” Thomas Jefferson

“Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell.” Author Unknown

“For every man there exists a bait which he cannot resist swallowing.” Friedrich Nietzsche



Temptations Lesson #1 – Worksheet for Stage #2

1. List three examples of advertisements that use alluring words or images

to motivate you to purchase their products. 2. What is it that makes those advertisements

alluring to one person but not to another?

3. What should you do when you read or see ads that are tempting you? 4. What should you do when your friends are tempting you to do something

that you know you shouldn’t?

This worksheet may be duplicated for educational purposes only. For more information regarding SELF-CONTROL or other Character Ed Tools programs please go to www.characteredtools.com or contact: Character Ed Tools, 15709 Arrow Hwy., Suite #2, Irwindale, CA 91706. (626) 960-6922. Character Ed Tools is a division of Camfel Productions, a non-profit company.


Set The Stage #3: Get a Grip

Activity: Time: 15 Minutes Material: 6 Foot Long Pole, Grease (Lotion, Butter, Vaseline) Have two of your strongest boys square off against each other with each boy holding one end of the pole. Ask the rest of the class who would win if the boys played tug-o-war with the pole. Have them pull against each other for a moment. Then grease the hands of the one they felt would win. Have them do battle to demonstrate that the grease doomed to failure the one they thought would win. Yes, it wasn’t fair that the favorite’s end of the pole was greased but it does get the point across. A firm grip on the pole is essential to winning the battle. Likewise, getting a grip on your self-control is vital to making the choices that are right for you.

Discussion: Self-control is the foundation of success. Without self-control you will struggle with money, time, health, resources, and relationships. A lack of self-control can significantly alter the choices you make in life. Failing to get a grip on self-control can lower your defenses, making it easy to give in to peer pressure and harder to say “no” to things like smoking, alcohol, and drugs. Low self-control can decrease your ability to study effectively or to live a healthy lifestyle, leading to lower grades and a negative self-image. It’s time to get a grip and take control of your life. When you learn how to exercise self-control you’ll be better able to manage bullying situations. You’ll be less angry and frustrated, and you’ll discover that self-control isn’t about denying yourself. It’s about getting a grip on your life to make the decisions that are right for you. Developing self-control will give you a positive out-look on life, create stronger friendships, and lead to academic success. 1. Talk about how developing self-control helps a person manage time, money,

health, and relationships. 2. How does a low ability to control oneself lead to smoking, drugs, or alcohol? 3. Why does getting a grip on your life help you feel better about the future, give

you a more positive out-look on life, and create stronger friendships?



Get a Grip Lesson #1 – Worksheet for Stage #3

1) What are some of benefits of developing your self-control? 2) What are some of the negative things that

could happen with a lack of self-control? 3) Why does getting a grip on your life and taking control of what you are

doing or how you are acting help you? 4) What is one area of your life that you should get a grip on and how would

it change your life if you did?

This worksheet may be duplicated for educational purposes only. For more information regarding SELF-CONTROL or other Character Ed Tools programs please go to www.characteredtools.com or contact: Character Ed Tools, 15709 Arrow Hwy., Suite #2, Irwindale, CA 91706. (626) 960-6922. Character Ed Tools is a division of Camfel Productions, a non-profit company.


Bridget “Biddy” Mason 1818—1891

Bridget “Biddy” Mason was born a slave. She received very little education, learning about midwifery and herbal medicines from the other slave women. In 1847, her owner, Robert Smith moved his household and slaves to the Utah Territory. Biddy’s responsibility was to herd cattle, prepare meals, act as a midwife, and take care of her own children. In 1851, Smith moved everyone again to San Bernardino, California. Shortly after arriving in California, Biddy discovered that California was a free state. With the help of some people Biddy met in Los Angeles, she took her case to court. In 1856, when Robert Smith was moving the group to Texas, a slave state, a California judge ordered Smith to free Biddy and her children. Bridget “Biddy” Mason became a freed slave. She immediately moved to Los Angeles and quickly became regarded as a nurse and midwife, assisting in hundreds of births. Biddy exercised a tremendous amount of self-control with her money as she soon became economically independent. Ten years after gaining her freedom, she purchased property in what is now downtown Los Angeles and became the first black woman to own property in the area. She later sold part of that land to build a commercial building with spaces for rental on the remaining land. She continued to exercise control of her money and accumulated a fortune for her time of over $300,000. Later in her life she was known as “Grandma Mason, known for donating money to charities and giving food and shelter to the poor. She helped start the First African Methodist Episcopal Church, the first black church in Los Angeles. Biddy died in 1891. In 1988, she was honored by Los Angeles mayor Tom Bradley and three thousand members of the First African Methodist Church. She was an example of how self-control in action could create a life of prosperity and benevolence. 1. How did Bridget “Biddy” Mason gain her freedom from slavery? 2. Talk about the self-control needed to go from slave to businesswoman. What did she do to earn

the money needed to build a financial empire? 3. Bridget “Biddy” Mason helped others with her midwifery skills while she was young, practiced self-

control with her words and money, and was able to build a small financial empire. What can you learn from her example?



What is Self-Control? Lesson #1 - Worksheet for Bridget “Biddy” Mason

1) How did Bridgett “Biddy” Mason gain her freedom? 2) What did she do once she gained that freedom? 3) How did her self-control with money help her? 4) What did she do with her money early in her life and then later on? This worksheet may be duplicated for educational purposes only. For more information regarding SELF-CONTROL or other Character Ed Tools programs please go to www.characteredtools.com or contact: Character Ed Tools, 15709 Arrow Hwy., Suite #2, Irwindale, CA 91706. (626) 960-6922. Character Ed Tools is a division of Camfel Productions, a non-profit company.


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