within these gates: 2014

Within These Gates2014

Derrick

NOTE FROM THE EDITORS:

All of the poetry and artwork in this literary magazine was created by young men from Washington, DC while incarcerated at New Beginnings Youth Development Center.

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A PRODUCTION OF MAYA ANGELOU ACADEMY• A SEE FOREVER SCHOOL •

Within∙

These∙

GatesFall 2014

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4 | Within These Gates

FREEDOM By Shaquille S.

Freedom is what I wantFreedom I can’t getFreedom, you really tauntFreedom, it’s coming soon- I betI feel like a bird that’s cagedWaiting for the chance to flyThis cage has me feeling enragedWhen I get my wingsI’m gonna fly highOh trust me, I'm gonna fly real high.

Devin

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2014 | 5

FREE ME By Andre

I see myself back to square one,Caged like an animal in the zoo.I miss being on the streets,Hearing the sounds:Tat, tat, pow, pow, boom, boom, bang, bang!I can hear the walls screaming, “Free me!” all day and night,Shout out to my men—seem like ya’ll not even gone.Talk to you every day, shake hands every morning.I wish they could free you, too.Man, why they just don’t free me?I’m stressing every night,Tossing and turning, trying to win this fight.Just free me and my men.

FREEDOM IS EVERYTHING By Dee'Monte

Freedom is everythingLet freedom shine like a wedding ringI grew up off nothing butHot dogs and beans.

The sun in the sky is freeThe birds that can fly are freeThere’s a lot of free things unlike meI feel like Hutus and Tutsis going toWar with the law to be freeJust so I can do me.

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FREE MY MIND By Saadiq

My mind is like a rubber band ballEvery time I learn something

Rubber bands get loose or come close to falling offIt’s like my brain is sayingFree meFree me from being on pause.

What does it take for my mind to be free?I have to take it off pause and find the cause.But my brain is so tied up that it is just lost

One question I ask myself isWill I ever be free again?True or false?

So, I say to you friendLet them rubber bands fall offAnd my mindStart over again.

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2014 | 7

Riccardo

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LIFE By Elhadji

I’ve spent my 16th and 17th birthdays locked upFeeling like a bird trying to be free

People keep saying next yearYou’ll be free, just wait.

But then the next year comesAnd for some reason it’s all just

The same.

Birthdays are supposed to be about meCelebrating with family, friends, and females.

But when your family becomes DYRSAnd your friends other residents

And the females…well there aren’t anyThat makes you start to think.

RIP to two lost birthdaysJust waiting for my 18th birthday

When I’ll be freeNo more lost timeNo more lost years

Just meLiving out the rest

Of my teenage years.

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2014 | 9

BROTHER By Demond

I’m my brother’s keeperAlways around like a shadowYou can look at his photosAnd see me in his shadowFor my brother I’d dieFor my brother I'd do anything.I am my brother's keeper.

RIP OSMAN By Tyrique

All I wanna know Is why u had to go?

When u died…Man it was so shocking

Miss u so much, rest in peace to OsmanU had a lotta haters

And a lot of motivators It wasn’t your time yet

August 17, 2011A day I won’t forget.

GODBy Antoine

Make peace for Allah. Make prayers for forgiveness.Cherish your life and children!Repent for your sins.Forgive your society!Everything makes mistakes.

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I'M HEREBy Aaron

Love, lust, life, lossCome back like thunder BOOM!

Love, lust, life, lossThank the cycle we must cross

Pause. Rewind. Play. Stop.Love, lust, life, loss

Who’s going to be the boss?Love, lust, life, loss.

TELL ME By Elhadji

Life is like living a lie.Told and sold

Just like the tidePeople living a lie

They cry, they cry, they cryLiving the life that

Was skyscraping so high.Talking to me about things

I won’t be able to seeTalking to me

About things we’ll never be.Life is like living a lie.

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2014 | 11

NOT HAVING HER TOUCH By Dee'Monte

Not having her gentle touch, probably the reason he turns up so much.Without the guidance he wandered off to a dark path……I walk these empty streets on the boulevard of broken HOPES, DREAMS.Why was he left out?Who’s gonna cry for the little boy with nowhere to run to?No one to love.They wonder why he mistreats women,Why he disrespects authority, Why he blows up.When they cry about their mothers beating them,He thinks, “I wish my mother was here to beat my ass!!!”And BOOM!There he goes again,Turnt up.Who’s gonna save the little boy from being in a box or prison cell?Who's gonna cry for me?

Riccardo

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LOVE IS...By Derrick

Love is like a purgatoryIt tests your patience like waiting

At the DMV.

Love is a gameIt’s like a boxing match in which only

One person is standing at the endAnd the other person has taken

An emotional beatingOr they both have.

Love can be like contact lenses That let you see the colors in the world

Or it can be like a blindfoldPulled over your eyes.

Love is what you make itDon't waste the chance you have for love.

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2014 | 13

LOVE IS DEADBy Elhadji

No, we will never be apart.Our love is like blood

It runs through my heart.

But we come from different worlds.Never let me go.

I can’tI won’t.

LOVEBy Greg

Love is like new flowersJust sitting and thinking for hours

Controlling the heart with no powerSinking quick, but still trying to get on the tower.

Love is the eyes of a humanBut the heart of a lion

Turning off and on like a light sourceJust sitting there thinking

While the clock clicksStill falling, but get up quick.

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G.U.N. V.I.O.L.E.N.C.E.By Elhadji

G- gunned down right by his homeU- united he stood aloneN- never seeing his mistake

V- viciously he died with hateI- independent his mom stoodO- only thought was how could?L- lonely and cold his body wasE- excursionN- never seeing his mistakeC- couldn’t open up the gatesE- excursion that was food.

Nate

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2014 | 15

3 GUARDIAN ANGELS By Isaiah

We were just together up Emery Shooting dice and joning.Now you guys are above me Looking out for me.The day I heard I lost 3 soldiers over nightWas as if someone pushed A knife through my heart.Rico told me what had happenedAnd how ya’ll burned in the backSeat of the car screamingFor help.But now I try to put that asideAnd make my priority cake. But ya’ll know ya’ll foreverTo be my men no matter whatAnd now I’m on the wrong pathDown New BeginningsDoing some months.But ya’ll knowI’m okay cause I’m toughBut I’m going to alwaysRemember ya’ll as my menAnd hold a spot for me causeI feel as thoughI’m next Cause of all the sinsAnd RIPEvery soldier.

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FREEDOM? By Ivory

I’m still myself,Free, young, smart, and strong.

I still got a long life to live.When it’s my time to go

I will be well remembered.

Malachi and Curt

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2014 | 17

LOVE LOSSBy Jamal

My heart pounds faster At the sight of the coffin

Body shakes While my life crumbles

Hurt All alone

Watching my pops Watch me

In his coffinDamn his face was torn

Like he heard the shackles Tighten on my wrist

I’m sorry I couldn’t be there The proper way

Thinking back to the better daysNo love lost

But loss of loveI’m sorry I’m not youBut I would be greater

Later

D.C.By Jamal

Money prostitutes itself for a lot of lives in the inner D.C.A lot of kids are physical like Elie Wiesel

And poverty is legalSatisfying the higher power business people

I woke up by the sounds of the Fourth of JulyAnd it’s August

Momma crying because of the shoesThat led her son to a coffin.

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WHAT IF?By Shaquille P.

What if, I was out there,

We would all be drunk.What if that mother didn't have to wake up

To a phone call telling her that her only son is gone?What if?

What if, That young girl's mother knew

That her father had been Raping her every night and she feels

Less of a woman?What if?

What if,As black men

We weren't judged for the way we dressOr how we wear our hair?

What if?

What if,There were only black people

Would there still be black on black war?Or is it just what the white man swore

To make a brother's head sore?What if?

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2014 | 19

Matthew

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WHAT'S LIFE'S VALUE ANYMORE?By Shaquille P.

Kids transforming from yesterday, to today.When I was young, we were outside having fun.

Running after the girls, Playing football,

Playing Freaky Friday, Playing tag,

And just being normal children.

In today’s world, You see children Twirking at ten,

Cursing like a bat out of hell, And living fast as lightening.

Why are all our young men And women thinking being criminals is cool?

Times are getting hard When you have to watch

Your back from the person you shared meals with.

When are you going to wake up? Or is it going to be too late?

McDonald’s is getting rich, But we can’t afford a plate.

What's life' s value Anymore?

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2014 | 21

WHY DC?By Paris

I walk up and down, and in circlesYoung boys toting guns

You’ll be lucky if they don’t hurt youSmelling weed every spot you posted at

Or is it maybe you the one taking a hit of that?A lot of guns around me, it feels like Vietnam

Drive-by shooting, why can’t this place keep calm?The ambulance siren sounding like warning

Just like that alarm clock when you wake up in the morningHomeless people on the corner getting bent

Is it meant for them to die? Or maybe it’s a hint.I ask myself this one question,

Why DC?

LIVE TO SURVIVEBy Lafayette

While I’m in the streetMy heart skips a beat.

Plotting on some cash like a thief.The streets calling my name,

So then I came.I’m so fly,

I’m a bird in the sky.When the feds came

I stood as still as a street sign.Life in the D.C. streets—

You have to commit a crime,Just to get by.

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CONTRIBUTION By Isaiah

This is a contribution to the people I loveI’m black, got tattoos, and a record so people going judgeThey see me as a little ghetto thugBut all I want is some love and a hugAysia, being my first love and that’ll never changeShe short, beautiful, smart, ambitious tooSo that’s the reason why Aysia I won’t forget youGrandma asked me- Boy, why are you like this?And I told her grandma, no disrespect, but I want nice s---So I’m going to finish this poem by sayingI love y’all and will be home soonMan Man, Karee, and Raynard- Please be my guardian angelsWhile I pray that I won’t get put in a tomb stone soon.

THE WORST PLACE By Derrick

I was born on the bathroom floorBorn in the worst placeMama was cryingThen came a knock on the Bathroom doorYou should’ve seen the look On grandma’s face!Brought up In the worst place.

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2014 | 23

TIME WAITS FOR NO ONE By Stacee

In my world I’m stuckBut wait, the world isStill moving like a girlAt a party who can’t stop groovin’ (time never stops)

Tick, tock goes the clockThe time is still goin’Like the middle of Antarctica it never stops snowin’

You go and get it whileYou canBecause if you playAround with life itJust might slip out your hands

Time waits for no oneI hope you understandMy name is StaceeAnd to make it isMy plan.

Tyreke

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BLOOD OF MY BROTHERBy Antoine

Brother to brother, Friend to friend

We grew up in the fast laneFrom boys to men

Now it’s the end of the road, I’ll see you on the other side,

I’m looking forward to that day, With my eyes open wide.

You were really a great kid, But growing up in the hood,

You did what you did,To take care of your family, And put food on the table,

And the worst part is,I wasn’t there to save you.

I feel all alone now that you’re deadAnd gone

I thought you were gonna Be there the day I came home

Now I’ll never hear your voice againExcept in my head,

I still can’t accept the fact That my brother’s dead,

I promise you’ll be rememberedAnd I’ll take care of your mother.

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2014 | 25

TO THE DEATH OF USBy Teion

Boom (2x) Boom (4x) Boom (6x)Woke me up out of my sleep

I was just dreaming about my 2 friends getting killed.I remember when I was 15 and my uncle

Roc was trying to get me on my feet by sellingDrugs. That’s what I wanted and still do, but

Now he’s gone. Now on the day of his funeral we allWent to the hood. We had fun, we took pictures, but

Later that night everything changed. It was Dark and I started to day dream

Boom Boom Boom.

Woke me back up and me looking atThe still breathing cousin of mine and

2 other friends had been shot.I remember when I ran the group home and

They all took me back and my brotherAnd cousin said I was speeding.

I was, but later that day I lost someoneThat I was really close to and will never get back.RIP Uncle Roc and to my big Cousin Trap ALY.

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WHERE DID YOU GO?By Brian

Hearing you left us makes my mind think slowYou was a man who honored the codes

Some people will never knowMy mind beating my head, my happy face for show

Tears ripping my eyes, it’s making my eyes low,They told me you was gone, but really, where did you go?

Why they ain’t warn us?I think they need to learn us

Since Don-Don got burned upThe block now got turned upNiggas scheming on the low

He got killed for some doughThey said Don-Don got killedBut really, where did he go?

Saadiq

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2014 | 27

DEAR GRANDMABy Shaquille P.

That night I got the phone call you were goneCrushed me like a car hitting a deer.

All the memories of the good times we had Started to strike like lightning.

I could remember the last words you told me were, “There’s nothing in them streets but trouble!”

Then my heart started talking to me, Telling me that it’s over.

I wish I could get a day where we can talk And I could tell you all of the things that I have achieved,

But I know you’re watching over meAnd making sure I’m okay.

DREAM STORYBy Demond

It seems like we just saw each otherLife ain’t always what it seems to be

Words can’t express what you meant to me.Boom! Boom! Hand shot, Damn!

He gone.That shit.

Wake me up like an alarm.

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RIP NOODIE & MARC By Saadiq

Rest in PeaceTo the ones that I used to have fun with.Rest in PeaceTo the ones that I used to have fun with. I remember all of the Halloweens That Noodie used to dress up like Mike MyersI used to always run from youBut you will never chase me Then you used to always catch me on the slick.I used to be out all night, andYou used to tell me to go in the house—me and Nick.Marc used to tell me to stop crashing I loved shooting dice with himI would take his money and then I’m flashingHe used to hang with my brotherAnd they used to smoke and bust movesThey did a lot of stuffAnd they were so smoothIt’s a hard time living round the farmsBut when I went to sleep and woke upIt’s like Noodie and Marc were gone…

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2014 | 29

Demetrius

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THE SCENES IN SE DC By DeAngelo

The cars wail and scream from bullets. Kids running around bare foot stepping on grass.Mothers crying, sons dying.The sun rises like the soul from a dead body.Sirens coming to pick up bodies. Gunshots spit on the wall of the building. Crack fiends, drug dealers trying to make a living. Weed plants walking without feet. Windows yelling at the bat, the building feeling weak.The moon is scared of the killings and dealings,So it creeps through the night like a stalker.My block is like Afghanistan gunshots, war, killing, kidnapping. Blood drips and bones whine and cry for freedom and no more pain. My love cries and cries for love to come.Teddy bears on every light pole.Candle lights every week.

LIL SCOTT By Tivon

Lil Scott was coolBut my mind was lost when I found out he was deadWhile in school.He was a good, forgiving personAnd stayed in his own lane.Trying to chase a dream, His mind devoured education like a geniusI stay like himI stay to myself.I’m like a bullet-proof vest;I can’t get touched.

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2014 | 31

DC STREETS By Nate

D.C. streets is where I like to be.It helps to make me feel free.The money I make makes me happy.It is the place where people can be snappy.On the D.C. streets everybody knows me.D. C. streets loves me.Yes, they make me free!!

LOCK DOWN YOUTH By Ch'Juan

Hanging out with EvolutionWords filling the air, the best pollutionIt’s the last day of school, but no celebration Cuz you’re carrying out the days of the sentences you’re facingBut this time next year. Some of you will be homeBack to the DC streets you’ll roamAnd it might not seem like much consolationBut although you’re here, dealing with lots of frustrationThis can be the start of something much greaterTurn things around, Sooner than later.

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DeAngelo

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2014 | 33

A WAY TO FREEDOM By Tievon

My life is very abusiveIt takes me behind metal doors

Where I can’t see inside And all I can hear is all these different voices

Trying to dig their way in my skullWith good advice but still I manage

To do whatever.

My life lets me out constantlyBut I guess it’s going to take for my life to click, clack, boom

And shoot a good word so I can understand.

What’s really important in my life?

My life never laughs, but still I manageTo not take it as joke.

But maybe I will go to the gym with my lifeSo it can grow big

And strong like a body builder.

This is sucesssIt's time to finesse

Cause now I’m blessed.

I have to take a chanceAnd make my life

Worth living.

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IT'S CRAZY BUT... By Ch'Juan

It’s crazy but the streets messed upIt’s crazy but the system don’t give a FIt’s crazy how the police treat usIt’s crazy but who care bout usIt’s crazy how the youth get treated in the systemBecause the government don’t careIt’s crazy but how can we change? It’s crazy how we can get in the systemBut how to get out?It’s crazy but it’s crazy and it’s crazy.

RIP RALPH By Dee'Monte

Why you Ralph?I remember trapping over the house.We used to have fun smoking rustlers And shooting each other with a paintball gun.Now why did you have to run?The stupid pigs would have never shot you With their nine millimeter gun.I didn’t want that to happen but the feds put you to rest.Talked to your mother at the funeral,She’s hoping for the best. And Sharon, She was trippingI told her that her daughter is blessed.And when we broke down the news She just broke down out of stress.They say the good die youngThen why the hell am I still left?

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2014 | 35

RIP TO MY MEN By Tre

To my menI miss ya’ll I remember the parties, the locker rooms at school,Shooting craps, and just talkingThe day each of you wentI felt like my world droppedEvery day I go knowing that you’re not hereLike a piece of a puzzle is missingI’m still hereThe memories stayAnd it will never go awaySo RIP to each of youYou’ll forever be remembered As my men.

STANDARDSBy Chris

I never knew why times were hard 4 me, Maybe it was beef, or maybe it was poverty. Poverty was getting worse and worse, So my stomach just hurt and hurt. I was trappin' all day and night, So my feet and shoes started to fight. Maybe the money was not the issue, Dead bodies, coffins, wet tissue. Brothers killing brothers for no reason. Summer, Winter, Spring, all season. House mouse stay cheesin'.Click, clack. Bang! Bang!Now it's leakin'.

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NEVER FORGOTTEN By Tievon

Where r u?Time passes by and still I can’t find you

People crying, blunts dyingWe know you’re not coming, but I wish

You could start running towards meSo I can forget about the pain he brought me

Remember the cars, blunts, laughs, girls, and gunsThey were all fun

Some people couldn’t stand us, most peopleLove us. He didn’t care because only 1 personIs being praised and that’s the man above us.

It hurts but I have to deal with itIt feels like a walking table running into everything

I can’t seeI know by now I’m supposed to feel relief

But I never experienced grief We will be back together

Just wait and seeI’m waiting on my mind

To find the key.

Victor

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2014 | 37

R.I.P "VONTA"By Trevon

Tear drops fall like rain All I’m praying for is better days.When everybody in my damn ear

Saying everything going to be okay!!!My eyes became watery

Just hearing that line.Down Bottom, we used to ball,

Now I’m writing your name all over my wall.Then I’m on my way to Iverson Mall

Today a messed up day To get a T-shirt with your face.

Whole hood in the club partying hard,“Go Vonta! It’s your birthday!”

But it’s not your birthday, it’s your death date.We was both 15 with a lot of big dreams,But on October 13th all that went away

When I looked in your face,And I just knew everything wasn’t okay

When your eyes closed.

Deontray

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FATHER By Nicko

When I was 8 years old,I watched my father get murdered.

3516 was our building number. We were leaving to start our day.

Around the corner comes a black truck.My heart was beating fast.

Then I heard gunshots.Bang! Bang! Bang!

He collapsed.I miss him,

But life must go on.

CJ WALKER By Donovan

I miss you bruhh--

Thing’s just so dumb.Why they kill my man,When you so young?

Not even thinking That you someone’s son.

A pair of shoes takenAnd you killed with a gun.Remember how you was?

We use to have fun.

You know I miss ya, homie--This your brother Donovan.

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2014 | 39

LOCKED UP By Tyrique

I hate being locked up, man I wish I wasn’t locked upBeing away from my family feels fucked upEspecially for more than 6 months

Being locked up is a bad feelingI pray 2 god a lot and ask him for forgivenessI call my mova when I get a chanceI tell her when I come home Ima be a better man

Da barb-wire fence is yellingI’m 16 with a felonAnd that’s one thing I regret Being locked up like having a heart

Cuz it’s not worth living da thing That I’m spittingGoes for thing that I witness.

JAMAR By Scoryn

R.I.P. JamarI remember the way we used to Smoke, shoot dice, and play ball.I still remember me seeing youBleed to death.The blood was like a pool.I remember we used to skip school,Because we thought it was cool.Man, I miss you.A day doesn’t go by without meThinking about you.I still remember all the things

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10 QUESTIONS ON LOVE By Michael

I don’t know what love means, do you?

Is love like a fresh cookie?Is love like a new born baby?

Is love like playing your favorite song on repeat?Is love a new car?

Or is love like a broken bone?Is love like withdrawal from drugs?

Is love like stinky socks?

Or is love like a puzzle?Is love like a championship game?

You tell me—what is love to you?

Michael

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2014 | 41

ME & MY MOTHER By Maurice

Love is like a snowball effectWhen I was young she would tuck me in And kiss me on my neckI love her smell and I pray to godFor her to stay well.My mom’s a nocturnal owlShe has that nightly smileI wonder is she eternalBut I know there is a road with a dark tunnel.My mom’s appearance Just only make my life the clearest.She is the red on a sweet rose.Without her, I would have never shined.

CHILDHOOD By Tyrique

As I look at it todayMy childhood was okI always had some fly shitNever missed a meal on my plateBecause momma always put me and my twin brother firstNo matter if the situation was good, bad, or worstAnd I love my mother to the death of meTil dey bury me in the dirtAnd Ima make my mother proud of meAs long as I’m on earth.

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FAST LANE By Trayvonn

Living my life in the fast laneCars all behind meMy mind racingBut time moving slowMy speedometer says 90 mphBut I feel like I’m moving slowCause I’m thinking about so much stuffTrying to get my shit togetherPeople just keep stepping in the wayLike bad weatherCausing an accidentI want to take a breakBut everything is coming fasterThe clock is stuck At 12pmBut I need to get to 2pm I should have just quitBut what does quitting get you?So I stay speeding in the fast laneNo one catching up to meStaying at 90 mphTrying to get home.

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2014 | 43

Juwaun

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LIFE TO MEBy Tyrique

Life has twists and turnsLike a roller coaster

Ups and downsLike an elevator

Pain and joyLaughs and cries

Been through a lot But still I riseWalk around

Head held highLife can’t put me down.

LIFE IN JAIL By Tyreke

Free me judgeLet me free myMindset to the

Better I want betterI am better together

Me and my brothers and sistersAre going to show you better

All I want is you toFree Me.

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2014 | 45

LIFE By Nicko

This is for the boy’s shaking knee,Sitting at the back of class,

Like this is for me.Or should I count to threeAnd my life will set free?I like looking at the tree,

When money comes to me.Some things in this world ain’t free,

But I miss the day everything came to me.This is the way life can be.

Marquise

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EDITORS:Chelsea KirkRashad Cuffee

SCHOLAR EDITOR:Johnithen

A SPECIAL THANKS TO:All Maya Angelou Academy Teachers & Staff Fellow English Teachers Ms. Remington, Ms. Barbara, and Ms. McKenna Maggie Kennedy Special Education Case ManagersAll Youth Development Representatives (YDRs) See Forever FoundationDepartment of Youth Rehabilitation Services

Cover by Impact Scholars

Centerfold artwork by Johnithen

Back cover art by Vernon

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2014 | 47

No part of this publication may be reproduced without permission from the authors, artists, and editors.

A PRODUCTION OF MAYA ANGELOU ACADEMY• A SEE FOREVER SCHOOL •

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LM2014 draft 2.indd 48 10/27/14 3:48 PM

within these gates: 2014

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