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WORKSHOP ON STORYTELLING (using the technique of telling stories in sessions)

BRUCE BONNETT

Image from: http://womeninastronomy.blogspot.com/2017/09/the-power-of-stories.html

“The right story at the right time can facilitate psychological and even physical healing.”1

“At its heart, hypnosis is a form of storytelling.”2

“Storytelling is about connecting to other people and helping them see what you see.”3

1 https://www.unk.com/blog/story-therapy-why-it-works/

2 https://aeon.co/essays/look-into-my-eyes-how-hypnosis-works-is-a-partnership

3 Michael Margolis, CEO and founder of Get Storied https://denisgmclaughlin.com/tag/michael-margolis/

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I. DEFINITION OF STORYTELLING “Most dictionaries define a story as a narrative account of a real or imagined event or events.”4 “At its core, storytelling is the art of using language, vocalization, and/or physical movement and gesture to reveal the elements and images of a story to a specific, live audience.”5 II. HOW BRUCE REALLY GOT INTO USING STORIES IN HYPNOTHERAPY SESSIONS

A. Bruce finds a children’s book that is a perfect metaphor for hypnotherapy

Bruce walked into a children’s bookstore to kill time before meeting friends for dinner. He saw a poster of this image on the wall:

4 http://www.eldrbarry.net/roos/st_defn.htm 5 http://www.eldrbarry.net/roos/st_defn.htm

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The image was from this book: “Sector 7” by David Wiesner. “This fantastic Caldecott Honor-winning tale, which begins with a school trip to the Empire State Building. There a boy makes friends with a mischievous little cloud, who whisks him away to the Cloud Dispatch Center for Sector 7 (the region that includes New York City). The clouds are bored with their everyday shapes, so the boy obligingly starts to sketch some new ones.”6

6 https://www.amazon.com/Sector-7-Caldecott-Honor-Book/dp/0395746566/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1533612633&sr=8-1&keywords=sector+7

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In the story, the human engineers who are in charge of operating the Cloud Dispatch Center hate the sketches and BLUEPRINTS FOR NEW shapes clouds could have. After all, clouds have always had the same kinds of shapes. How dare the little boy even PROPOPSE CHANGES so that clouds could be in the shape of a fish or octopus or other sea creature!!! Obviously, the engineers RESIST the BLUEPRINTS FOR CHANGE and the engineers insist that the boy must leave immediately. However, the boy had already PLANTED THE SEEDS FOR CHANGE and the clouds liked the new shapes. The clouds started wearing the new shapes. And, eventually even the RESISTANT engineers came around and accepted the new shapes. Do you see the parallels with hypnotherapy? Desired change. Creative blueprints for change. Planting seeds for change. Resistance. Overcoming resistance. Amazing changes result. Clients loved it when Bruce incorporated this book – and others he found – into sessions. *** See entire book on YouTube at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DibbAcieLso

B. Bruce starts to run out of ideas for repeat clients Repeat clients kept coming back for more sessions, and Bruce was running out of scripts and ideas to add something new each session. So, he started looking for stories online about people who overcame problems similar to clients’ issues, news stories that might inspire clients to make changes, etc. Again, clients loved this! III. WHY USE STORYTELLING?

A. Stories engage clients and get client’s attention

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“Stories engage us. They make us listen. They hold our attention. We want to hear what happened.”7

B. Stories bypass the critical area of the mind (which would normally evaluate information and possibly dilute or reject the information). Stories also expose client to a new “reality” “Stories do several things in hypnosis first they bypass the critical factor. The critical factor recognizes a story and really pays no more attention to it simply because it is a story. There is no resistance to stories. The other thing that stories do for you is to take your reality away and suspend it as you enter a new reality. You often find yourself identifying with the characters the speaker is talking about and experiencing their lives and emotions as if they were your own. They allow you to live in the character’s experience.”8

C. Stories “sneak into” clients’ subconscious minds “Make no mistake – stories are able to achieve something in the easiest possible way that hypnotists everywhere strive to accomplish: They bypass the critical conscious mind and weave their way into the unconscious... stories sneak into the unconscious mind. They do this in a number of different ways:

• They bypass your critical and analytical conscious mind • They allow you to escape from reality • They fire your imagination • They enable you to identify with the characters and

situations”9 7 https://hypnosistrainingacademy.com/become-a-great-storyteller-become-an-almighty-hypnotist-using-stories-to-slip-past-the-critical-conscious-mind-conversational-hypnosis/ 8 http://conversational-hypnosis.com/articles/a41.html 9 https://hypnosistrainingacademy.com/become-a-great-storyteller-become-an-almighty-hypnotist-using-stories-to-slip-past-the-critical-conscious-mind-conversational-hypnosis/

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D. Stories match client’s brain waves to hypnotherapist’s brain waves and make use of: (i) the way our brains work naturally; and (ii) the impact emotions have on us.

“When I’m telling you a story, and you’re engaged in it, you match your brain waves to mine… it’s why good storytelling is so powerful. That feeling of synchronization is a profoundly satisfying one. Stories are how our brains work. For example, they are why we all feel that it’s safer to drive than fly, even though the statistics prove the opposite. We remember the horrifying stories of plane crashes and forget the stats. That’s because we attach emotions to events to create stories and memories. Our brains are constructed that way.”10

E. Stories take advantage of the fact that our minds cannot distinguish a story from reality “When we experience hypnotherapy, it is often the case that, at some point during the session, the therapist will tell a particular type of story, known as a metaphor. Embedded in such stories are meaningful truths that the subconscious mind will understand and process in a different way to the conscious mind. Scientists now know that the same part of our brain lights up when we listen to a story as when we actually experience something in reality. Therefore, our minds really do not distinguish between what is real or imaginary.”11

F. Therefore, stories are a perfect vehicle to communicate hope and suggested changes to a client “Stories bypass the shredding effects of over-analysis and conscious reasoning. Stories are inherently hypnotic in that they fixate attention and appeal to the imagination. This makes story therapy

10 https://www.forbes.com/sites/nickmorgan/2015/04/14/what-storytelling-is-and-is-not/#1e4f63b17221 11 https://www.hypnotherapy-directory.org.uk/hypnotherapist-articles/the-use-of-storytelling-in-hypnotherapy

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the perfect device for delivering fresh patterns of hope as well as more specific suggestions for change.”12

G. Note: sometimes clients get stuck in their own “negative” life stories – and hypnotherapy sessions using stories can help them change their stories “Our stories are our life. How many of you know someone who is constantly hung up on a sad story in their life? They are a constant ‘victim’ of some unfortunate event that has befallen them, and you routinely hear them gripe about their misery and woe. Here’s the thing. Their misfortune may be very genuine and understandable. Many people get stuck on their sad story. At one point they were a genuine victim of circumstance, but then they voluntarily chose to carry their misfortune with them. It became a part of their identity. So, what does this have to do with hypnosis? Everything. You use language to hypnotize yourself all the time, whether you mean to or not. You reinforce your stories and beliefs over and over again with the words you tell yourself. They finally sink in to your subconscious and become a part of your reality. During the day if you ask yourself a crappy question like ‘Why me?!’ your subconscious mind will oblige you with a crappy answer like ‘Because you suck!’ However, if you ask a more empowering question like ‘What else could this mean?’ or ‘Where is the gift in the problem?’, your subconscious mind will come up with a helpful, positive answer. A hypnotherapist can help you clearly identify your stories, and help you easily replace the bad with the good. It is quick, simple and amazingly powerful. So, don’t like your story? Perhaps it’s time to write a new one!”13

H. There is no downside or negative side effect

12 https://www.unk.com/blog/story-therapy-why-it-works/ 13 http://nicholsclinicalhypnotherapy.com/no_more_bs_stories

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“And if a story doesn’t immediately ‘work’ for someone, no harm is done. They have simply heard an entertaining story!”14 IV. MILTON ERICKSON AND STORYTELLING

“Ericksonian hypnotherapy (or indirect, metaphorical hypnosis) is the term used to describe a very specific type of hypnosis which is hallmarked by the use of indirect suggestion, metaphor and storytelling, as opposed to the direct type of suggestion that was its predecessor.”15

“Erickson relied extensively on storytelling and metaphor in his hypnosis techniques... a non-threatening approach in Ericksonian Therapy that allows people to address their problems without speaking directly about them.”16

“Renowned hypnotist Milton Erickson is famous for using

stories to get around a person’s resistance to hypnosis. Erickson was a master at storytelling, but he didn’t simply make up stories on the spot. Instead, he used any information he could get his hands on, information that was relevant to the person seeking help. That could be information about: Their personal history

Their cultural background Their habits Their beliefs Their interests and hobbies

Erickson had a knack for weaving stories around topics he knew the patient had an interest in. Before the person knew what was

14https://www.unk.com/blog/story-therapy-why-it-works/ 15 https://www.naturalhypnosis.com/blog/what-is-ericksonian-hypnosis-and-how-is-it-used 16 https://www.quora.com/What-styles-of-hypnotherapy-did-milton-erickson-introduce-or-use-and-what-effect-did-he-have-on-the-world-of-hypnosis-Also-any-true-stories-about-him-1

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happening, Erickson would have brought him or her into a trance state. Erickson knew that if he could get the patient engaged in the story, he could add words of power and subtle suggestions... in fact he was using the story as a vehicle to motivate, inspire, and help the patient make significant changes.”17 V. EXAMPLES: STORIES FROM REAL LIFE BRUCE HAS USED WITH CLIENTS (from Bruce’s life, from the news, etc.) A. Bruce’s Dad’s painting – for clients who: (i) need something funny to think about to decrease anxiety, distract their minds from stress, fear, temptation, etc. or (ii) who need to relax so something will happen more easily “naturally” – for example, memory, fertility, erectile dysfunction, insomnia, sports performance, chemotherapy, etc. Here is a true funny story a colleague [actually Bruce Bonnett] told me about his father. His father was an art major in college. And his father’s roommate in the college dormitory was a good friend of his father’s – but the friend had no artistic abilities whatsoever. He was a math major. However, the roommate thought “if I take a class in the art department, my roommate – the art major – can help me – so I won’t have to work hard at all and I can get an easy, passing grade.” So that is what the math major roommate did. He didn’t go to class often. Eventually, the end of the semester approached – and the friend was surprised and dismayed when he found out that – in addition to the exam – students in the class were required to actually paint a “modern art painting” to demonstrate what they had learned in the class. The day before the project was due, the roommate approached my colleague’s father (the art major) and begged for his help. After pleading for help and saying he would fail the class if he didn’t turn anything in, my friend’s father – the art major – agreed to help him at least get a “D” grade. So, the art major grabbed a canvas – threw some paint on it… dribbled a little more… Swirled it around… and said, “turn that in. it should be good enough to get a passing grade.” 17 https://hypnosistrainingacademy.com/become-a-great-storyteller-become-an-almighty-hypnotist-using-stories-to-slip-past-the-critical-conscious-mind-conversational-hypnosis/

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So, the math major roommate turned in the painting that had been done in just a few minutes. And, the professor loved it – and gave it an A+. In fact, the professor entered the painting in a competition – and it won! It was then hung in a museum for years – under the name of the math major roommate (who had no art ability). Kind of a funny story. And, I bet that as you were listening along you were not focusing on the fears or habits or stress that used to bother you. And, there is a lesson in this story as well. Perhaps my colleague’s father – the art major – did his very best work when he wasn’t trying too hard – wasn’t worried about what others would think – in fact, didn’t even think anyone would ever know he did the painting. So, as you allow your unhelpful thoughts to drift away like helium balloons—and as you allow your mind to be distracted with funny or humorous thoughts, you may be surprised or not so surprised to find that you are feeling better and achieving more.

B. Bruce’s housecall session in which a fire broke out – for clients who: (i) need something funny as a distraction; or (ii) need to realize they can achieve their goals even if they get interrupted or encounter unexpected obstacles along the way Of course, you prepare for your presentation or talk or project or plans to go smoothly – as you expect. But, even if something unexpected happens or you get interrupted, it may surprisingly make it even more memorable and more effective. Knowing this will allow you to relax. And, of course, everything goes better when we relax and are not too tense or nervous. Perhaps this true story about another hypnotherapist 18 will illustrate. This hypnotherapist describes what happened as follows: “So, I was scheduled to do a ‘house-call’ session at the home of one of my clients – but with a friend of my client who was visiting from out of town. When I arrive, I am slightly nervous because I see that a movie or TV show is being filmed at a nearby house – so there are tons of crew, equipment, security, etc. in front of the house & extending up and down the block. I hope they won't make too much noise and head inside. My client who owns the house introduces me to the friend. She leads us to the room where we are going to do the session – a lovely room with a nice fire going in the fireplace, a nice comfortable recliner, high 20-foot ceilings, etc. She makes sure the 18 Actually, the hypnotherapist was Bruce Bonnett. But he wrote this script talking about “another hypnotherapist” so that it will be easy for you to use it with your clients.

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phones are all off. She gives the three dogs who are running around inside (yes–three) some treats to try to keep them occupied a bit. Then, she heads out to run an errand to make sure she doesn't make any noise that could interrupt her friend's session with me. So, the session is going along great. I have to keep massaging the three dogs to keep them quiet during the session – but I am used to that. My new client is deep in hypnosis and I am giving her suggestions and telling some metaphorical stories. That is when I hear a crackling sound from the fireplaces – and I see that a log in the fireplace has split in half and rolled out of the fireplace onto the lip of marble area in front of the fireplace. It looks like it will be ok, so I proceed. A minute later, I hear another crackling noise, and that piece of log splits more and another piece rolls further out of the fireplace starting to catch a nearby decoration on fire. At this point, I have to stop the season and tell my new client we have to do something about the fireplace. Neither of us lives in this house or knows where anything is located. I try to push the log pieces back into the fireplace while she tries to find a teapot or something for water – which she brings back and dumps on the logs – creating more smoke. By now the smoke alarm at the very top of the 20-foot ceiling is going off full blast making deafening noises. We are trying to open all the windows and get some of the smoke out – when the doorbell rings. The TV/film crew's security is at the door asking if everything is ok – and if we can turn the alarm off because they can't film with all the noise. We can't get up to the smoke alarm – so the crew offers to bring in a big ladder. In the process, they manage to let the 3 dogs escape out the front door. So, we all go running down the block chasing a very fast little Chihuahua and two Chows. The dogs – scared by all the noise and commotion – hide under a huge bush that is located in a patch of dirt that had turned into a mud pond after some overnight rain. Because I was the only one of us the dogs know very well, I had to crawl in my nice dress pants and white shirt through the mud, under the bush and retrieve the dogs. After the smoke is cleared, the smoke alarm stops blaring, the dogs are pacified, the security and film crew leave, etc., we finish the session. The funniest thing is that the presenting issue this new client wanted to work on was her fear that something would go wrong or she would be unexpectedly interrupted during her sales presentations. She came out of hypnosis laughing and said she wasn't worried any more – because she would never have to face as many interruptions and distractions as I had to face to complete the session!” The client loved the session, certainly never forgot it, and came back to the same hypnotherapist for more sessions subsequently to work on other issues.

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C. Fans vote for the “worst professional hockey player” to play in the all-star game—for clients who have to face a bad situation, who are not as skilled as others, or who fear being embarrassed about something Sort of a cool story about how good things can result just by having a good attitude and being open to the possibility of good results. For a number of years, fans and sports writers were unhappy with the annual National Hockey League’s all-star game. One or two of best players in the league chose not to play – for fear of getting injured in a game that didn’t mean anything. Others who did play did not try very hard, because there was no incentive to do well in the game. Many considered the all-star game to be a “big joke” and a waste of time. So, some sports radio show hosts and bloggers decided to play a joke of their own. The players who play in the all-star game are chosen based on the votes of the fans. So, those radio show hosts and bloggers started a campaign to encourage fans to vote for the player they considered to be the “worst player in the league” – as a nasty joke making fun of him and making fun of the all-star game. The player they encouraged fans to vote for was John Scott – a tall, big guy who didn’t play very often and whose role mainly was to jump on the ice and beat up anyone on the other team who was playing too roughly against the star player on his team. He was called “an enforcer.” He wasn’t the fastest skater. He only had scored 5 goals total in over 8 years playing in the league. Mostly, it was his job to sit on the bench ready to fight – so the other team would not rough up the star player on his team in a way that might cause the star to get injured. The radio show hosts and bloggers thought it would be really funny to watch how slow and bad John Scott was compared to the real all-star best players also voted to play in the all-star game who he would have to play with and against. However, John Scott wasn't negative about being the butt of a joke – even when the league tried to prevent him from playing in the game – and instead embraced with a good attitude the adversity as an opportunity and turned it into something incredible. In short, he got 2 goals in the All Star Game – even though he only had had 5 goals previously in his entire 8-year National Hockey League career before that – he was named most valuable player – he won a car – his all-star team won $1million and many of the players donated their shares to him – they are making a movie about this – and they are putting his hockey helmet in the NHL Hockey Hall of Fame – not bad for the worst player in the league who was only voted into the All Star Game because some people thought he was so bad and it would be so funny to watch how badly he would play in the All Star Game!

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“The John Scott story is the ultimate underdog narrative in sports during 2016 when Scott—in the twilight of his career—went from a joke All-Star fan-voted nominee to scoring two goals and winning the All-Star Game’s MVP title. This is his heartwarming story about an average Joe who became a sports superhero overnight. Known as a willing-and-able fighter and bruiser in the league, John Scott was a surprising and tongue-and-cheek nominee for the 2016 NHL All-Star Game. He’d been in the league for over eight NHL seasons, playing for teams such as the Wild, Blackhawks, Rangers, Sabres, and the Sharks. Scott’s best attribute as an NHL player was dropping his gloves—never the best player, the 260 pounder did become the most feared fighter in the NHL, racking up extensive penalty minutes. In order to prevent him from playing in the game, his current team—the Phoenix Coyotes—traded Scott to the Montreal Canadians, who demoted him to the AHL team in an attempt to disqualify him from playing in the All-Star Game. Fans were outraged, and Scott was devastated. He’d been downgraded in his job—forced to relocate while his wife was pregnant with twin girls. But the fans wouldn’t back down and insisted the NHL let Scott play in the game. The league relented, and Scott not only was invited to attend the NHL game in Nashville but was nominated a team captain. The media and sports fans at large fell in love with the giant six-foot-eight player who by all means, was just a normal guy and no superstar player. In a true Cinderella story, Scott scored two goals and was the All-Star Game’s MVP. This is his personal memoir—detailing his life growing up and how he was able to keep his sense of humor and become the ultimate Cinderella-Story of hockey.” https://www.amazon.com/Guy-Like-Me-Fighting-Make/dp/1501159615/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1530711185&sr=8-1&keywords=a+guy+like+me+john+scott

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John Scott's Cinderella Story: From Fourth-Liner to All-Star MVP By Sammi Silber February 1, 2016 http://lastwordonsports.com/2016/02/01/john-scott-a-cinderella-story/ “There is no hockey fan out there who would ever expect to hear the words “John Scott” and “MVP” in the same sentence. But after a chaotic month of voting, trades and reassignments, along with a hell of a weekend, that has all changed. For Scott and the entire National Hockey League, the 2016 All-Star weekend will go down in history. Scott had gone from a fourth-line goon to All-Star MVP, all over the course of the month. Rightfully so. For those who don’t know the story, the enforcer was asked to bow out of the All-Star Game, but when he refused, the league and the Coyotes decided to make it so he would be ineligible to play. The Coyotes traded Scott to the Montreal Canadiens, who immediately assigned him to the AHL St. Johns Ice Caps. After backlash from the fans and many looking down on the league for their treatment of the 33-year-old enforcer, commissioner Gary Bettman came to his senses and allowed Scott to participate, since he won voting fair and square. And from the moment Scott stepped off that flight to Nashville, he created a frenzy. Before the festivities kicked off, Scott published a piece on the Player’s Tribune, titled “A Guy Like Me.” Here, he stirred controversy when he discussed his poor treatment from the Coyotes front office and the entire National Hockey League, while also discussing how the only thing he wants is for his family to be proud of him. And everyone heard him. Seriously. All of his jerseys and gear sold out. Autographed pucks and memorabilia were being sold for hundreds of dollars. And the media was all over the player that no one ever really thought anything of, and to make things even more hilarious, Scott took a picture of the giant media presence during his press conference. For the Skills Competition, Scott wanted to wear his Ice Caps jersey due to the fact he technically does not play for Arizona or Montreal, but the league would not allow him to do so. So, he slipped on his standard black All-Star Jersey, with no team patch and the “C” rightfully sewn over his heart. Clad in his uniform, the 6-foot-8 captain skated out for the skills competition and received a deafening standing ovation. When he went up to participate in the hardest shot contest, the cheers got louder and louder. This would go on for the entire weekend; it was not just the skills competition

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where the fans screamed for Scott, who has only scored five goals in the NHL. The game was really where Scott shined. He laced up his skates and led the Pacific Division all the way to the 3-on-3 championship victory over the Central Division. He scored two goals, including an impressive breakaway goal, where he scored top-shelf on the far side. Not only that, he made sure to bring his role as an enforcer into play, when he crunched Patrick Kane in a crushing hit then fought him in a mock bout. After an impressive performance and win, Scott was named the NHL All-Star Game MVP and was carried on his teammates’ shoulders. His smile would be absolutely priceless, and the cheek-to-cheek grin would not fade when he was awarded a $1 million check and a brand-new car. It was a special night and a great ending to an amazing journey. “You can’t really write this stuff,” Scott said. “To be able to come to the game first of all and then meet all the guys, and have them kind of accept me, and then have the warm embrace by the fans. And then to go out there and win the tournament and to be named MVP… it’s. Just. Crazy.” “Crazy” is an understatement. After the game, Scott’s helmet was collected, and it will be placed and displayed in the NHL Hall-of-Fame in Toronto. Bettman, who did everything he could to stop Scott from playing, told the enforcer he was proud of him. His jersey sales will continue. Teams will never underestimate the role of an enforcer again. Yes, Scott deserved that award. And it wasn’t just for an impressive two-goal performance and a strong outing as the captain of the Pacific team. He deserves it because he is now an NHL hero. Why? He made the game more than the “joke” it has been for the last few years. He caught everyone’s attention, and so many more people were watching. He saved the league’s worn-out game by bringing back the diversity, as well as the fun. I’m not kidding when I say that Scott’s very presence made the game so much more memorable, and I’m sure it brought in much more attention and money than it had in previous years. What also makes Scott a hero is how he defied the league that told him to bow out, and when he paid the price, he refused to just sit there and take it. This past weekend, Scott proved that anyone can be an All-Star, even if they were a mock write-in. In fact, he had a pretty strong performance and will probably capture the attention of many different NHL teams. That breakaway goal is something that many cannot do, and even Tyler Seguin went and pointed that out. What Scott did went beyond playing in a game and making everyone laugh. He made sure everyone was watching and captured the attention of everyone, even those

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who aren’t hockey fans. No one missed this Cinderella Story, where he had to face poor treatment and corruption and overcome all odds to win in the end. And thanks to a hell of a story, the league got more attention from the game than they would had Scott sat out. For those of you who say that he didn’t deserve to play: you are wrong. Scott deserves everything, from being a captain, to playing in the game, to being voted MVP. Now, everyone knows the name “John Scott.” It will no longer be simply known as the name of a fourth-line enforcer, but now, he will be known as ‘All-Star Hero.’”

D. Best chef in America gets cancer and loses sense of taste for a while – for clients facing disease, loss of abilities, something that seems to have crushed their dreams, etc. It Sounds Crazy, but Cancer Has Made Me a Better Chef By Grant Achatz, as told to Jo Cavallo December 1, 2013

I was diagnosed with stage IVB squamous cell carcinoma of the tongue in 2007, when I was just 33 years old, but the cancer had started to show itself long before then. I first noticed a white dot on the left side of my tongue in 2002.

Visits to the dentist eased any concerns I had. “You are working 18 hours a day, raising two young children, and are stressed. Chances are you are biting your tongue at night when you sleep,” said my dentist.

My restaurant Alinea, which I had opened 2 years earlier, had just been named the Best Restaurant in America by Gourmet magazine, and all my attention was focused on creating the next menu. As the sore on my tongue got bigger and more painful, I saw another dentist who essentially confirmed what the first dentist said and fitted me for a mouth guard. She later sent me to an orthodontist to correct an overbite she thought was the cause of the sore. As soon as the orthodontist looked into my mouth, she told me I would need to see an oral surgeon for a biopsy. It was then that I found out that I had advanced-stage tongue cancer that had metastasized to the lymph nodes in my neck.

When I met with an oncologist in Chicago, he told me that my stage IVB disease and neck metastases would require radical treatment, including neck dissection and removal of 75% of my tongue. The protocol was a sure career-ender for a chef who needs his taste buds to create the unusual mixture of flavors and scents that are the hallmark of the progressive American cuisine served at Alinea.

The treatment would also include chemotherapy and radiation, and after it was completed, said the oncologist, not only would I lose my ability to taste food, my

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ability to speak and swallow would be severely compromised. He also said my chances of surviving longer than 2 years were slim.

I went to two other cancer centers in Chicago and one in New York for additional opinions, and the oncologists all agreed with the proposed treatment protocol and prognosis.

Being a chef isn’t just my vocation; it’s my passion. I considered my options. If I could no longer do what I love, and the quality of my life was going to be so diminished, with a good possibility I wouldn’t survive long anyway, then I would decide against the treatment. Thinking Outside the Box

My close friend said, “We need to find someone who thinks about medicine the way you think about food: outside the box.” . . . [He] made an appointment with Everett Vokes, MD [John E. Ultmann Professor of Medicine and Radiation Oncology and Physician-in-Chief, University of Chicago Medicine and Biological Sciences], and that was the game changer.

Dr. Vokes suggested that instead of doing surgery first, then chemotherapy and radiation, the plan could be reversed. He and his team put me into a clinical trial that included a combination of four chemotherapy drugs, two of which were cetuximab (Erbitux) and cisplatin, followed by targeted radiation therapy. Dr. Vokes told me that even if the chemotherapy and radiation didn’t completely eliminate the tumor, they would reduce it enough so that surgery would be less invasive.

Within 2 weeks of beginning my chemotherapy regimen, the tumor started shrinking. Five months later, after I had completed 12 rounds of chemotherapy and 65 radiation treatments, my cancer was in remission. My tongue and neck were spared, and I’ve been in remission for 6 years. Life Changer

Although I continued to work throughout my treatment, it was tough. The radiation burned my tongue, destroying my taste buds, and shed the lining of my esophagus. I had to rely on my staff to taste the food for me. Even after the treatment ended, it took about a year before my sense of taste was completely restored.

I know it sounds crazy, but I really believe that having cancer has made me a much better chef and entrepreneur and improved my life. The experience taught me it was okay to let go of some of my control in the kitchen and trust the talent of my staff so they could grow in their careers. It also gave me a greater willingness to take chances, which led to the opening of two more restaurants.

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In 2008, a year after his cancer diagnosis, Mr. Achatz was named Best Chef in America by the James Beard Foundation. http://www.ascopost.com/issues/december-1-2013/it-sounds-crazy-but-cancer-has-made-me-a-better-chef/

E. College student walks 20 miles to new job when car breaks down – for clients who need motivation (sometimes, amazing things result if we keep pushing ahead despite obstacles or difficulties) An Alabama man walked almost 20 miles to his new job. When his boss found out, he gave him a car. The Washington Post, July 18, 2018 Walter Carr sent his friends a flurry of increasingly pleading text messages. The college student’s car had broken down, and he was supposed to begin his new job as a mover the next morning – at a home 20 miles from his apartment near Birmingham, Ala. He struck out finding a ride, but he wasn’t about to miss his first day of work at a moving company called Bellhops. Carr, 20, needed the work. He mulled his predicament and concluded there was only one option: He would walk it. He searched the route from his apartment in Homewood to the house in Pelham, and according to Google Maps, it would take eight hours on foot. As a former high school cross-country runner, he knew he could do it in less. Carr ate a meal of bologna and eggs at 8 p.m. and took a nap. At midnight, he woke up, grabbed his wallet, phone, a baseball and a kitchen knife to protect him from stray dogs. He headed out into the dark. He jogged some. He walked a lot. When his legs began to burn, he stayed focused on his goal. He’d had jobs in the past as a cook at fast-food restaurants, but this paid better, and he needed the money for an apartment he’d recently rented. At 2 a.m. he passed the city of Hoover. Around 4 a.m. he reached Pelham, but he still had hours more to walk to get to the house. He was about to enter the highway ramp, the most direct route to the job. He sat down in a bank parking lot. “I decided I’d rest for a minute because my legs were killing me,” he said.

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A police car pulled up and the officer, identified by the news site AL.com as Mark Knighten, asked if Carr was all right. Carr said yes and explained what he was doing. “I said, ‘This is crazy but I’m actually heading to work. It’s my first day in the job,’” Carr recalled. The officer asked him when he last ate, and Carr told him about the bologna and eggs. Knighten offered to take him to get something more in his stomach. “I said, ‘I just paid my rent. I have no cash on me at all,’” Carr recalled. Knighten told him to get in the car, the meal was on him. They went to Whataburger with some other officers, and Carr ordered a chicken biscuit. At the urging of the officers, he ordered another one, he said. Knighten drove Carr a few miles toward his job and dropped him at a church, saying it was a safe place to be. Knighten had to leave because of a shift change, but he said another officer would be by in a few hours to check on Carr, and perhaps give him a ride to work. But after Carr got to the church, he became concerned he might not make it on time. So around 5:30, he started walking again. Carr was walking on a two-lane road, and sure enough, a police officer came up and said he’d heard about him. That officer, identified by AL.com as Scott Duffey, drove Carr the last four miles to his job. At 6:30 a.m., Duffey walked up to the house where Carr was supposed to meet the other movers for the job and explained to homeowner Jenny Lamey what had happened. “The officer told me, ‘I’ve got this nice kid in my car. He’s a great kid, he’s been walking all night to get to your house,’” Lamey said. “That’s when the tears started coming. I just started crying.” Carr came to the door and Lamey offered him a bed to take a nap, and some food. Carr replied, “No, I’d rather get started,” Lamey said. The other two movers from Bellhops showed up shortly after, and the three of them moved the Lameys across town to their new house. “He’s such a humble, kindhearted person,” she said. “He’s really incredible. He said it was the way he was raised. Nothing is impossible unless you say it’s impossible.”

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One of Carr’s new co-workers gave him a ride home. The following day, Lamey called Carr’s supervisor, and the two cried together on the phone about what Carr had done. Lamey posted the story on Facebook, and it took off. She started a GoFundMe with a goal of $2,000 to help him with his car troubles. As of Wednesday morning, it had raised more than $44,000, and a financial adviser had volunteered to help Carr manage the funds.19 On Sunday, Carr’s boss, Bellhops chief executive Luke Marklin, called to thank him. Marklin said he wanted to meet him in person to show his appreciation. They agreed to meet Monday at a coffee shop near Carr’s apartment. Carr walked the 20 minutes there. When they met, Marklin gave him his own car, a 2014 Ford Escape. He said it would be in better hands with Carr than with him. “We set a really high bar for heart and grit and… you just blew it away,” Marklin told him. Carr has gotten a lot of attention in the past few days for his almost 20-mile trek. He said it’s been surprising, but he feels good sharing it. “The lesson of my story is it’s great to reach people, I always wanted to inspire people,” he said. “Don’t let nobody tell you that you can’t do something. It’s up to us whether we can.”

Walter Carr and Jenny Lamey in front of Carr’s new car. (Courtesy Jenny Lamey). 19 As of July 25, 2018, over $91,000 had been donated to this GoFundMe account for Walter Carr. https://www.gofundme.com/5pmd8-thank-you-walter Walter is donating anything raised more than $66,000 to The Birmingham Education Foundation, which is dedicated to increasing the number of students in the Birmingham City Schools that are on the path to college, career, and life readiness http://www.wbrc.com/story/38679026/walter-carr-donates-portion-of-gofundme-funds-to-birmingham-organization

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F. College freshman boldly asks Billy Joel an “impermissible” question—for clients who are afraid to try something or do something even though they want to You may know of the singer Billy Joel. He is a “pianist, singer-songwriter, and composer. Since releasing his first hit song, ‘Piano Man,’ in 1973, Joel has become the sixth best-selling recording artist and the third best-selling solo artist in the United States. His compilation album Greatest Hits Vol. 1 & 2 is the third best-selling album in the United States by discs shipped. Joel had Top 40 hits in the 1970s, '80s, and '90s, achieving 33 Top 40 hits in the United States, all of which he wrote himself. He is also a six-time Grammy Award winner who has been nominated for 23 Grammy Awards throughout his career. He has sold more than 150 million records worldwide, making him one of the best-selling artists of all time.”20 Sometimes, Billy Joel will visit universities and speak to the students there about his music and career. And, sometimes, he lets the students ask him questions during these visits. The questions are supposed to be about the music industry or the creative process of writing and producing hit records. For example, “How do you get the ideas for your songs?” Or “How do royalties work if someone uses your song in a TV commercial?” Or “How do you stay relevant in the music industry over a span of decades?” You can imagine how nervous some of the students must be to ask questions of this world-famous musician and singer. In 2013, Bill Joel was doing just such a visit and talk at Vanderbilt University21. A freshman student there and a pianist himself, Michael Pollack, had been a lifelong fan of Billy Joel. So, of course, he attended the talk. During the question and answer period, Michael somewhat nervously– after encouragement by his friends—stood up to ask his question. Unlike the other students who had asked questions, Michael didn’t ask for information about Billy Joel’s career or the music industry. Instead, Michael (the university freshman)—in a somewhat shaky voice – asked if Billy Joel would sing Michael’s favorite song “New York State of Mind” while Michael accompanied him on piano. There was a gasp in the audience. At this sort of an event, you are definitely NOT supposed to ask Billy Joel to perform with you!!! After Billy Joel heard the question, he paused for a moment and simply said “OK.”

20 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Joel 21 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bceuh8c-4kg

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So, Michael joined Billy Joel on stage. And, it turns out that – even at his young age, Michael is an amazing piano player. So, Michael does an amazing job of playing the song “New York State of Mind” on the piano while Billy Joel sings it. Afterward, the crowd erupted into thunderous applause. And Billy Joel said to the crowd: “That’s Michael Pollack. Remember that name. Michael Pollack. Nice going Michael. The guy’s got chops. And that’s how you get to be a player in New York City. Take a chance.” The video of this the video “went viral, landing Pollack on The Today Show, CNN, Sirius XM Radio, and The Jeff Probst Show as well as countless others. Articles on the performance have been written by major news sources like Rolling Stone, Yahoo Music, The Huffington Post, and TMZ.”22 All because – despite his nerves – Michael got up the courage to ask his long-time idol – Billy Joel – to perform with him. VI. MORE EXAMPLES: CHILDREN’S STORIES, FAIRY TALES, AND “TWISTED FAIRY TALES” BRUCE HAS USED WITH CLIENTS

A. Lisa Machenberg’s interview with Bruce about these

“Children's Books and Hypnosis” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N3f9uzNqq-8 Hypnosis TV Published on Dec 6, 2011 with host Lisa Machenberg and guest Bruce Bonnett.

B. How to introduce these to clients in sessions (use discretion obviously)

Our minds like to learn from stories, because we have learned that way ever since childhood. Stories are also a great way to “exercise” your imagination and ability to visualize. So, I am going to tell you a children’s story from an actual kids’ book – and, in this relaxed hypnotic state with your eyes closed, I want you to just imagine what the illustrations in that kids’ book probably look like. At the end of the session, I will show you the actual book and you can compare what your imagination came up with against the actual illustrations in the book created by the author/artist.

22 http://www.michaelpollackmusic.com/about.php

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C. Bruce’s AHA talk about this

“Using Children's Books in Hypnotherapy” Presented By: Bruce Bonnett American Hypnosis Association AHA Guest Speakers Instructor Bruce Bonnett demonstrates how to effectively use children's

books in your hypnotherapy practice to help clients using metaphors and imagery. https://hypnosis.edu/aha/videos/1886 WTVAHACON / Release Date: May 1, 2013 / Production Date: Mar 23, 2013 /

Format: SD

D. A Bad Case of Stripes. Shannon, David. 1998. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxQt7u1NI6c (Lesson: Each person is different. Focus on what is right for you. Do not focus on what others think or fear.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKaQXmRvpvw

E. The Three Pigs Wiesner, David. 2001.

http://www.houghtonmifflinbooks.com/authors/wiesner/books/books_3pigs.shtml (Lesson: Even if you have had some bad days, we can find a new outcome.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86WcS9I-yWI

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F. Sector 7 Wiesner, David. http://www.houghtonmifflinbooks.com/authors/wiesner/books/books_sec7.shtml (Lesson: In hypnosis, we will create blueprints for change. Your mind or body may put up some resistance – but we will plant the seeds for inevitable change and feeling better).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DibbAcieLso

G. June 29, 1999. Wiesner, David. 1992.

http://www.houghtonmifflinbooks.com/authors/wiesner/books/books_june.shtml (Lesson: Do not obsess on fears that may not turn out to be real – or that you cannot control).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KpAZji0kfo

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H. Seriously, Cinderella Is SO Annoying!: The Story of Cinderella as Told by the Wicked Stepmother

For: clients who have to try to see things from a new perspective Show the client how things always look different from a different perspective

– and there is always a way to change the client’s “life story” – by showing them these funny revised fairy tales that are told from the perspective of someone other than the main character. You can even have the client listen to the stories being read aloud—which can be found on www.youtube.com.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhkqPWy2NLo

I. Another twisted fairy tale: Trust Me, Jack's Beanstalk

Stinks!: The Story of Jack and the Beanstalk as Told by the Giant

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSvX6CDgJtQ

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VII. TIPS ON TELLING STORIES

A. Pick or tailor story based on client and client’s issue(s)

“To match a story to the needs of an individual you have to look at the wider pattern of their life and seek a story that fits that pattern. Clients often deluge you with so much detail that, if you don’t make a conscious effort, you can lose sight of the bigger picture. When sitting with clients I’ll often ask myself repeatedly: “What is really going on here?”

Many traditional ‘fairy tales’ match common life patterns such as:

• Disadvantaged childhoods • Appearance of benign help from outside later in the ‘story’ • Overcoming seemingly impossible obstacles • Personal qualities flourishing because of rather than

despite disadvantages.”23

B. Involve all client’s senses – describe sounds, smells, etc.

“Hypnotic language communicates to all the senses, so when you tell a story, describe the sounds, sensations, smells, tastes and sights as fully and vividly as you can. For example, compare ‘The sun shone on the lake’ and ‘A bright golden sun blazed in the deep blue sky, drawing a shimmering haze like an exotic gauzy veil up out of the deep dark waters of the lake.’ Vivid descriptions fully engage your listener and make the story an experience, almost like a dream.”24

23 https://www.unk.com/blog/story-therapy-why-it-works/ 24 https://www.unk.com/blog/story-therapy-why-it-works/

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C. Tips – Based on great stories from great TED Talks

TED Talks Storytelling: 23 Storytelling Techniques from the Best TED Talks by Akash Karia

D. Elements of a typical story “The Elements of a Story In its simplest form, a story has 4 basic parts:

1. There’s some action 2. There’s something that interrupts the action 3. There’s someone who this interruption affects 4. There’s a change or transformation that usually echoes

something from the beginning of the story”25

25 https://hypnosistrainingacademy.com/become-a-great-storyteller-become-an-almighty-hypnotist-using-stories-to-slip-past-the-critical-conscious-mind-conversational-hypnosis/

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VIII. BOOKS OF THERAPEUTIC AND HYPNOTIC STORIES – FOR USE WITH CLIENTS WHO ARE CHILDREN

Therapeutic Storytelling: 101 Healing Stories for Children by Susan Perrow) “The first fifty pages of the book give the storytelling “tutorial.” the remaining 200 pages are stories, stories, and more stories, the list of categories is exhaustive and runs the gamut from hitting/biting, anxiety/fearfulness, bullying/exclusion, social conflicts of all kinds, divorce, resilience, sexual abuse, bad language, to discrimination, and more. Some of the stories may be just what a teacher has been looking for to address a situation.”26 “Susan Perrow passionately believes that ‘stories know the way’. Working with imaginative journeys and the mystery and magic of metaphor, she has developed the art of therapeutic storytelling for children’s challenging behaviour and difficult situations. She offers a tried and tested method for creating a unique story for a child to help resolve issues, build emotional resilience and character.”27

26 https://www.waldorflibrary.org/journals/15-gateways/1208-book-review-therapeutic-storytelling 27 https://www.amazon.com/Therapeutic-Storytelling-Healing-Stories-Children-ebook/dp/B07BYX9PPJ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1533561745&sr=8-1&keywords=therapeutic+storytelling+perrow

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Harry the Hypno-potamus: Metaphorical Tales for the Treatment of Children, Volume 1 by Linda Thomson

Harry the Hypno-potamus: More Metaphorical Tales for Children by Linda Thomson

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IX. SOME ARTICLES ABOUT STORYTELLING FOR SPECIFIC CLIENT PRESENTING ISSUES

Addictions

“The Role of Storytelling in Addiction Rehab: Moving from Past to Future” https://www.thecabinchiangmai.com/the-role-of-storytelling-in-addiction-rehab-moving-from-past-to-future/

Alzheimer’s Dementia

“When a Senior Can’t Remember the Story, Let Them Make It Up” https://www.agingcare.com/articles/storytelling-helps-memory-loss-from-dementia-151001.htm “How Storytelling Can Help People with Dementia” https://parade.com/593884/ccopelan/how-storytelling-can-help-people-with-dementia/

Anti-Aging

“Anti-Aging and Anti-Depressant Effects of Storytelling” https://www.verywellmind.com/powerful-anti-aging-and-anti-depressant-effects-of-storytelling-2223891

Asthma “The Three Little Sheep: A Healing Story Redux” [about asthma] http://healingstory.org/the-three-little-sheep-a-healing-story-redux/

Bedwetting

“Therapeutic Storytelling: 101 Healing Stories for Children” By Susan Perrow https://books.google.com/books?id=GaBUDwAAQBAJ&pg=PT234&lpg=PT234&dq=bedwetting+storytelling&source=bl&ots=-qgAT2vwz6&sig=b99hq-gowatpP-mkmiDHHfxnxZU&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiZrOW81a_cAhVnHDQIHQbeDUU4ChDoAQgsMAE#v=onepage&q=bedwetting%20storytelling&f=false

Blood Pressure

“Storytelling May Help Lower Blood Pressure” http://healthland.time.com/2011/01/17/story-telling-may-help-to-lower-blood-pressure/

Cancer “Storytelling as part of cancer rehabilitation to support cancer patients and their relatives.” https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/27612167 “Can Storytelling Help Patients Battle Cancer?” https://syneoshealthcommunications.com/blog/can-storytelling-help-patients-battle-cancer

DIABETES

“Story-Based Interventions: Functions of Storytelling That Can Promote Disease Self-Management Among Those Living With Diabetes”

https://www.canadianjournalofdiabetes.com/article/S1499-2671(17)30492-6/abstract

FEAR OF DENTIST

“How to Use Storytelling To Overcome Fear” https://www.thecreativeintrovert.com/use-storytelling-overcome-fear/

FERTILITY

“Hope, Fertility & Storytelling” https://expectful.com/our-podcast/hope-fertility-storytelling-alex-elle/

FIBROM “Life with pain using body-map storytelling”

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YALGIA https://www.klusster.com/portfolios/waterloo-region-chronic-pain-initiative-s-portfolio/contents/2625

HEADACHES

“The Healing Power of Storytelling” https://www.huffingtonpost.com/richard-c-senelick-md/patient-care_b_1410115.html

HEALING

“Healing Through Storytelling” https://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/02/10/healing-through-storytelling/

HIV/ AIDS

“Two Men Talking—HIV/AIDS and the Power of Storytelling” https://www.opensocietyfoundations.org/events/two-men-talking-hivaids-and-power-storytelling

IBS “Decoding Stigma in IBS – The Importance of Story Telling” https://irritablebowelsyndrome.net/living/decoding-stigma-importance-story-telling/

Multiple Sclerosis

“Storymaking and Storytelling: Making Sense of Living with Multiple Sclerosis” https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/14427591.2003.9686510?journalCode=rocc20

Pain “The Beauty in Pain: Storytelling & The Chronic Pain Experience” https://scholarworks.umt.edu/etd/11130/

Parkinson’s Disease

“1 Hour More: A Storytelling Project to Improve Parkinson’s Disease Patients’ Quality Of Life”

https://www.medcareernews.com/1-hour-more-a-storytelling-project-to-improve-parkinsons-disease-patients-quality-of-life/

PTSD “PTSD Exposure Therapy in VR: Importance of Storytelling & Emotional Presence in Healing from Trauma” http://voicesofvr.com/571-ptsd-exposure-therapy-in-vr-importance-of-storytelling-emotional-presence-in-healing-from-trauma/

Smoking Cessation

“Storytelling Helps People Stop Smoking” http://www.newbrandstories.com/2011/02/05/storytelling-helps-people-stop-smoking/

Stress “How To Use The Power of Storytelling to Stop Stressing” https://medium.com/thrive-global/how-to-use-the-power-of-storytelling-to-stop-stressing-f87fc9eb9e58

Stuttering

“Using Oral Storytelling to Help Children with Stuttering or Language Disorders” https://thespeechclinic.wordpress.com/2013/04/22/using-oral-storytelling-to-help-children-with-stuttering-or-language-disorders/

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X. FOR AN INTERESTING “REVERSE PERSPECTIVE” – HOW TO USE HYPNOTIC TECHNIQUES WHEN YOU ARE A STORYTELLER WHO IS TELLING A STORY “Hypnosis and Storytelling” by Vance L. Mellen Submitted to Brigham Young University in partial fulfillment of graduation requirements for University Honors July 1, 1994 28 “Thesis Statement: Using hypnotic techniques in the performance art of storytelling will enhance a natural altered state, enriching the storytelling experience for both performer and audience.” For example: ERICKSON'S CONFUSION TECHNIQUE – Another technique I've used in [storytelling] is a deliberate and intentional confusion technique as put forth by Erickson. When confusion techniques are used well they work powerfully in taking an audience deeper into trance, while forcing them to abandon needless resistance (Yapko 1989, 248) As he developed the confusion technique, Erickson recognized that what needed to occur was the combination of a perfectly comprehensible situation to which the patient could readily respond and an irrelevancy, a non sequitur, to which the patient could not respond with sufficient rapidity without extensive "mental reorganization." thus the patient is caught in a state of bewilderment and enters the hypnotic condition. (Edmonston 1986, 223) Usually a story is an entirely comprehensible experience, simple and straightforward. Rather than starting out with "Once upon a time..." I prefer to enter the story at a point of confusion. The audience has no idea what is happening. I am creating a disjointed puzzle. There is no "establishing shot" which describes the setting and context. Nothing adds up. The audience is left to become entranced… surprise and shock and loud noises work as confusion techniques by jarring the subject's expectations and usual mental sets (Rossi 1979, 128).”

28http://www.mellenheadprods.com/Tales%20of%20Terror/Background%20for%20Tales%20Page/Hypnosis%20and%20Storytelling%20Honors%20Thesis.pdf

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XI. ANOTHER BOOK POSSIBLY OF INTEREST

Hypnotic Storytelling Kindle Edition by James Malone “A collection of 23 carefully chosen stories that can be used by those involved with any type of change work including hypnotists, coaches, counselors and therapists. These stories are for the most part brief and easy to use while addressing commonly encountered challenges related to habit control, stress relief and life guidance. After each tale some ideas are shared on the key points along with some personal coaching tips.” https://www.amazon.com/Hypnotic-Storytelling-James-Malone-ebook/dp/B00FO799V0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1533572914&sr=8-1&keywords=hypnotic+storytelling+malone NOTE: This book contains 3 stories related to habit control issues, 9 stories related to stress relief/healing, and 12 stories related to life guidance.

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XII. PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE

“If you have not yet used story therapy in your practice it can feel a bit strange at first, but it won’t be long before it will start to feel like the most natural thing in the world. Which it is!”29

29 https://www.unk.com/blog/story-therapy-why-it-works/

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https://imagebox.com/industry/tell-best-story-best-business/

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KEEP PRACTICING!

If Bruce sees you are not using the practice time in this workshop to practice, he will assume you have mastered all of the techniques in this handout. So, do not be surprised if Bruce then calls you up to the front of the class and asks you to demonstrate to the class one of these techniques!!!