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MICRO REVIEW Blank Space Gajan Thiyagarajah IT Ops IT Ops Cyberbrain Exceeds expectations as expected 1 University of Melbourne Student Union VCE Summer School 2015 WORKSHOPS! PLEASE BRING: SHOES (ESPECIALLY FOR DODGEBALL) TOMORROW 21º - 12º TODAY 22º - 14º 0900 Classes 1100 Group Meating 1115 Trivia 1315 Lunch 1400 Classes Anouncements Due to bad weather Activities are switching Scav Hunt with Trivia. A game will still be required. Welfare would like to let students know that they should not sign up for one on one tutoring more than two days in advance Edition III Wednesday 14 January, 2015 Due to an unfortunate amount of rain washing out scav hunt activities today, we bring you the Zine that celebrates the best of summer! ZINE Recap... Aloha Summer Schoolers! Yesterday we were kept from the wonderful weather outside by some fabulatastic workshops (it was totally worth it). Here’s what happened: VCESS proved in the Leadership workshop that one day its students will in fact rule the world. We heard wonderful speeches about why we should conquer New Zealand, and even a speech in an Irish accent (to be sure). Basses, tenors, altos and sopranos - all the students in the choir workshop were singing like professionals (with the assistance of John the talented pianist, of course). e balls went up, and then the balls fell down. e Juggling workshop taught us how to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and keep on trying. From essays to short stories, budding writers of all levels were more knowledgeable about this wonderful craſt by the end of the Creative Writing workshop. In Moving Out of Home, practical scenarios encouraged the students to weigh up the pros and cons of independence and freeloading. No students were made any more broke by their participation in the Texas Hold ‘Em Poker workshop - they were, however, made richer in knowledge. Director Tom McQ explained to his students what to eat and when to eat it in Spain (which is of course the most important thing to know about Spain). What’s the difference between sex and gender? What role does the media and the law play in constructing our gender identities? How is discrimination manifested in a practical environment? e fab Feminism workshop gave us the answers. Apparently, the Victorian Curriculum is super duper easy compared to the Russian curriculum (So you guys have nothing to worry about with VCE!). Russians also like violent sports.

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MICROREVIEW

Blank SpaceGajan Thiyagarajah

IT OpsIT Ops Cyberbrain

Exceeds expectations as expected

1

University of MelbourneStudent Union

VCE Summer School 2015

Workshops!

please bring: shoes (especially for dodgeball)

TOMORROW

21º - 12º

TODAY

22º - 14º0900Classes1100Group Meating1115Trivia1315Lunch1400Classes

Anouncements

Due to bad weather Activities are switching Scav Hunt with Trivia. A game will still be required.

Welfare would like to let students know that they should not sign up for one on one tutoring more than two days in advance

Edition III Wednesday 14 January, 2015

Due to an unfortunate amount of rain washing out scav hunt activities today, we bring you the Zine that celebrates the best of summer!

Z I N ERecap...

Aloha Summer Schoolers! Yesterday we were kept from the wonderful weather outside by some fabulatastic workshops (it was totally worth it). Here’s what happened:

VCESS proved in the Leadership workshop that one day its students will in fact rule the world. We heard wonderful speeches about why we should conquer New Zealand, and even a speech in an Irish accent (to be sure). Basses, tenors, altos and sopranos - all the students in the choir workshop were singing like professionals (with the assistance of John the talented pianist, of course). The balls went up, and then the balls fell down. The Juggling workshop taught us how to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and keep on trying. From essays to short stories, budding writers of all levels were more knowledgeable about this wonderful craft by the end of the Creative Writing

workshop. In Moving Out of Home, practical scenarios encouraged the students to weigh up the pros and cons of independence and freeloading. No students were made any more broke by their participation in the Texas Hold ‘Em Poker workshop - they were, however, made richer in knowledge. Director Tom McQ explained to his students what to eat and when to eat it in Spain (which is of course the most important thing to know about Spain). What’s the difference between sex and gender? What role does the media and the law play in constructing our gender identities? How is discrimination manifested in a practical environment? The fab Feminism workshop gave us the answers. Apparently, the Victorian Curriculum is super duper easy compared to the Russian curriculum (So you guys have nothing to worry about with VCE!). Russians also like violent sports.

Origami WorkshopCam and Blake

Folded too quickly.

Submiting MicroreviewsZine Team

Rewarding. You should try it.

2

VCE is really hard and you want to do well, so you should probably chain yourself to your desk and devote your every waking hour to study, right? WRONG!

Be a good person, not just a good student

School can help you to pass exams, but it can also give you opportunities to help develop yourself. Wherever you can, take opportunities to give mentoring, sport, art, drama, music, or any other activities a try. It’s always worth it to get experience in leadership, time management, team work, communication, and to challenge yourself. It might take up some time to be a student leader, or to paint a set for the musical, but doing it puts you on track for a 99.95 in life. If you have those opportunities, take them, if not, make them!

You’ll get by with a little help from your friends

Finding time for friends can be tough during VCE, but it’s definitely worth it. Make sure you’re still finding time to just hang out, go to a movie, celebrate a birthday, it’s important. You can’t replace a social life with study, instead it gets replaced by feeling stressed and lonely, then you’re overwhelmed by stress and loneliness. Next minute you’re crying next to the kettle in your year 12 common room…

You can do school work and job work

If you have a part time job, don’t hand your resignation letter in just yet! If your job is easy, at regular, predictable times, it can be a good escape from VCE work. It gives you a breath of fresh air in a new environment, around different people, develops other skills (see point 1), and gives you money to spend on fun things (see point 2).

The best study tip I ever got was to not study. At least not all the time. Doing well in things like debating, drama, sport, leadership, or the student magazine doesn’t mean doing badly in VCE. Seriously, that was this Zine member’s year 12 schedule.

Very Cool Edvice*

Bubble O BillFeatures: Has no distinct features, they all merge

into one disfigured faceVerdict: ambitious flavour combo, bubblegum

extends experience.

Rainbow paddlepopFeatures: Superior caramel flavour, stereotype challenging colours, stick can be used as a craft supply.Verdict: The absolute summer classic.

The strawberry in

NeopolitanFeatures: Undeserved arrogance that it deserves to

share tub space with chocolate and vanilla, great staying power, disappointing children everywhere.

Verdict: This flavour is a sick joke.

Golden Gaytime Features: Teehee

Verdict: Perfect taste. Bonus star for sexual innuendo.

Milo scoop shakeFeatures: Amazing flavor, inhibited by concrete-like consistency and frequent spoon breakage.Verdict: You awkwardly take scoops from the softer edges creating an island/moat situation, but the struggle just increases the reward.

SUMMER

ICE CREAM

REVIEW

3

Tony Abbot StudmuffinGajan Thiyagarajal

Stop the VotesNo Stars

Air ConditioningKeit Loi

I’m a huge fan

English 236Theatre 101Cam Boyle 80Physics 68What does that say about their morals’ 44Cam Bloye 25Brae Closter 25Blank Space 23Financial Security 16VCESS Residential Green Team 15#rach5prez 12Eliot Cope 10Yu Wei Cai 10Maddie Smales 10Schukze Method 9Mel Tassos 9#spambloye 7Shane Woods 6Liz Peak 5Tom Walker 5Tom McQuillan 5Maddie Johnson 5Declan Primer 5Dextar Archibald 5Phoebe Yeung 5Conor McCafferty 5Georgia Bovalino 5Mandy Chau 5Tessa Coy 5Jackie Ding 5

Bina Gray-Viggiano 5Lyn Huynh 5Amy Luo 5Himal Pillay 5Kevin Shen 5Yazmin Velarde 5Elise Zsidai 5Tony Abbot 5Alicia McKee 5Madeleine Serle 5Emily Flude 5Jennifer Maya 5Oceanna Vaotuua 5Madeleine Bourke 5Glen Coco 4Ops team 4Kristen Jerzyna 3Chris Chosich 3 3Patrick Clearwater 3Sarah Strugrell 3Constance Rubino 3Aaron Hawton 3Mina Arsinerich 3Hannah Pisano 2Anna Qin 2Brett McColl 2Blake Stephensen 2Ozkan Tugra 2Giahay Truong 2John Nanghten 2Jacqui Fuzzard 2

Darius Hubbard 2Michelle Phan 2Bree O’Dwyer 2Kristen Jerzyna 2Lachlan Lyons 2Captain Woon 2Samantha Standfield 2Physics Sucks 2Anais Poussin 2Danielle Loughnam 2Paigey Rae 2Charles Peak 2Patrycja Stadwra 2Efrah Fabrize 1Mariah Cotter 1Mitch Keating 1Sasauka Premachandra 1Ruth Joseph 1Marle Bolilo 1Mono Hagi 1Tom Nguyen 1Aishwangea Swresh Babel 1Ethan Tsang 1Sanara Gunawardena 1The Zine Team 1Lana! 1LANA!! 1LAANAA! 1Dangerzone! 1Studmuffin 2014 1Becky Morris 1

Cordelia O’Rourke 1Studmuffin 2015 1Maddie Smabes 1Taylor Hamilton 1Ninja Umbrella 1Hannah Smidt 1Emma Malley 1Megan Baker 1Bareraha Lincoln 1Molly Copeland 1Julie Mae 1George Wilson 1Alex Jones 1Kirsty Ha 1Glitches in the matrix 1Winged Eyeliner 1The kid who looks like Liam Hemsworth 1An Empty Chip Packet 1Slicked Back Hair 1The silver sloth 1Rich people with bad fashion sense 1Civil Unions 1Inactive good tumblr usernames 1The 1930s 1Blackfish 1Ryan Osborne 1Melissa Bodilly 1Bryannah Ladder 1

Kathleen Owes 1Alana Majstorovic 1Jess 1Sam Zaman 1Lynda Romana 1Caitlin Grant 1Luke Mannix 1Georgie Lonnellan 1Abdifatah Abdi 1Louise Embuscado 1Kelsey Leah 1Marcus Mak 1Kousar Mohamed 1Helen Gebre Medhim 1Andy Tran 1Oscar Izard 1Dexter Archibald 1William Huang 1Jordan Nelson 1Matthew Thomas 1Sueed Bey 1Catherine Campbell 1Kirkatron Buck 1Chris Chooreemootoo 1Director Tom 1James Cock’s Boss 1Matilda Adam 1Dannielle Bakhour 1None of the Above 1Gretchen Weiners none

|Stud-Muffin|

Vegos and Vegans out there will be well acquainted with fallback options like margarita pizza slices and salads with all the good bits taken out, but it is angry-making when you have to pay money for food with virtually no nutritional value and often half the ingredients of an actual meal. The following is not an exhaustive list of options on campus, but rather my personal favourites. Bon appetit!

+ Vegie Burrito from Zambrero’s (ask for half rice and double beans for extra protein!) The only real option for vegans in my opinion.

+ Vegie sandwich from Subway (without the ‘vegie pattie’ it’s essentially a salad in bread, but with it, and bonus avocado it’s entirely edible)

+ Vegetarian or Avocado Sushi from Plush Fish (it’s cheap, easy and full of delicious starchy carbs for energy)

+ Noodle Dish of Your Choice from Saigon Noodle (many combinations available, including tofu and bean curd, but ask about the soup, because several of them are made with fish or beef stock)

Feeling Snackish?

+ House of Cards (next to Old Metallurgy) has a rotating menu of Jaffles that always includes one vego option. + UniCurry will sell you Aloo Paratha very cheap, which is not all that nutritious, but tasty and filling on a budget.

Herbivorous Options in Union House and Beyond

Isn’t this the best weather ever? goatally!!

4

notice: [COMIC RELIEF]

aries (mar 21 - apr 19)Stay cool in the sun by cryogenically freezing yourself. Then you can wake up in one thousand years and hang out with Walt Disney.

gemini (may 21- jun 20)Aloha friends! I would write a horoscope for you, but I am far too relaxed sitting here in my ham-mock that I really can’t be bothered.

cancer (jun- jul 22)With Neptune now approaching, it is the time to find summer romance. But totally platonic romance. #NoFrat.

leo (jul 23- aug 22)Is your summer job getting you down? Don’t stress, just think of all the shoes, islands, and chocolate you will one day buy with your fortune from working at McDonalds.

virgo (aug 23- sep 22)The greatest cure for betrayal is drinking a fruity drink under a palm tree. Or murder. Your choice.

libra (sep 23- oct 22)With the latest summer blockbusters comes the inevitable influx of advertising. Conquer it by buying every Big Hero 6 lunchbox.

scorpio (oct 21- nov 22)Although you might be filled with sadness at the end of summer, you can make it last. Run away and roam the land, leaving responsibilities behind.

sagittarius (nov 22- dec 21)One of the greatest experiences is swimming with dolphins. However, as dolphins are said to be very smart, they probably think we’re idiots.

capricorn (dec 22- jan 19)The worst thing about summer is the inevitable back to school sales. This year, don’t buy a new uniform - ar-rive naked. Everyone will admire your personal style!

aquarius (jan 20- feb 18)

Ice cream is the classic summer treat, so make sure to have some today. Or maybe three or four tubs. Or maybe only eat ice cream for the rest of your life.

pisces (feb 19- mar 20)This summer, try a new activity such as roller blading or baking, or crochet. Or you could just nap and listen to your Mum nag. Why must you disappoint her?

taurus (apr 20- may 20)Today, don’t just wear a hat to avoid skin cancer. Wear a full body suit to protect your skin and end up looking like a beekeeper.

[doddle box comment]

Thought of

the day: “When writing essays be paciffic!”

Announcement! Tea, Talks, and Titles: Come visit Graham cornish B at 12:30 on Thursday for a picnic extravoganza. There will be food (donations of goodies appreciated). Bring your favourite book and embrace your inner Brit!

Workshop ‘An Absurd History of Middle Earth’ is back on. As your nearest Ops troll or director elf on how to sign up

Sudoku

HOROSCOPES