2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

Freeze Time

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

Name the “time.”What’s happening at the moment you Freeze Time?

My zipper was stuck.

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

What rotten luck. I wondered why this had to happen today of all days. All I wanted to do was get outside, but it looked like I would be stuck inside while my friends were having fun in the snow.

What’s the character thinking?What does the reader need to know to understand why this is important?

My zipper was stuck.

Good

writers

read more

than they

write!

Reread. Add the character’s

thoughts to explain why

this moment is important.

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

My zipper was stuck. What rotten luck. I wondered why this had to happen today of all days. All I wanted to do was get outside, but it looked like I would be stuck inside while my friends were having fun in the snow.

Good writers

read more than they

write!

Reread and think about what else the reader needs to understand.

What’s the character sensing?What does the reader need to know to understand why this is important?

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

Now add sensory

details that

help make

your point.

From my window I could see my friends using makeshift sleds out of cardboard boxes and trash can lids. Their smiling faces and shrieks of laughter let me know they were having fun.

What’s the character sensing?What does the reader need to know to understand why this is important?

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

My zipper was stuck. What rotten luck. I wondered why this had to happen today of all days. All I wanted to do was get outside, but it looked like I would be stuck inside while my friends were having fun in the snow.

From my window I could see my friends using makeshift sleds out of cardboard boxes and trash can lids. Their smiling faces and shrieks of laughter let me know they were having fun.

What’s the character feeling?What’s the character doing that shows that feeling?

Good writers

read more than they

write!Reread and think about what else the reader needs to understand.

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

I felt so frustrated. While my friends were having the time of their lives, I was having the struggle of my life with a stubborn zipper. My fingertips were red and ached from yanking so hard. Tears stung my eyes as I chewed my bottom lip and held onto the hope that my luck would soon change.

From my window I could see my friends using makeshift sleds out of cardboard boxes and trash can lids. Their smiling faces and shrieks of laughter let me know they were having fun.

What’s the character feeling?What’s the character doing that shows that feeling?

If Charlotte’s web

were in the corner of the

room, how would she

know what the character is

feeling?

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

Use a 3-box plan to turn your Freeze Time ideas

into a complete

story.What led up to the

most important thing that happened?

What happened because of the most important thing that happened?

What was the most important

thing that happened?

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

What led up to the most important thing that happened?

Set the stage for the important event.

•Who is the story about?

•Where is the character?

•What is the point of the story?• What is the problem? or• What does the character want? or• Why is the character there?

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

I felt chilly as I pulled back the covers. Reaching for the jeans and sweatshirt I had set out the night before, I quickly got dressed for school. Maybe a nice hot breakfast would warm me up.

As I finished my eggs, I heard the radio announcer say that schools were closed because of the snow. I was so excited that I forgot all about being cold. Mom said I could go outside if I bundled up good. I pulled my knit cap over my ears and put on my winter coat. “Don’t forget to zip up!” she reminded me. That’s when the trouble started.

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

What was the most important thing that happened?

Develop the important event by explaining what the character is:

•thinking

•sensing

•feeling•doing that shows how he is feeling

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

My zipper was stuck. What rotten luck. I wondered why this had to happen today of all days. All I wanted to do was get outside, but it looked like I would be stuck inside while my friends were having fun in the snow.

From my window I could see my friends using makeshift sleds out of cardboard boxes and trash can lids. Their smiling faces and shrieks of laughter let me know they were having fun. I felt so frustrated. While my friends were having the time of their lives, I was having the struggle of my life with a stubborn zipper. My fingertips were red and ached from yanking so hard. Tears stung my eyes as I chewed my bottom lip and held onto the hope that my luck would soon change.

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

What happened because of the most important thing?

Wrap up the story with a satisfying ending.

1.Get the character out of the problem.

2.Let the reader know how the character

feels or what he learned.

2009. Norma Jackson, Writing Consultant

Just as I was ready to whine for mom’s help, I heard a small rip. The fabric that had been caught in my zipper tore free. Quickly I tugged my zipper up to my chin and threw open the front door. Squealing with glee, I ran to join my friends. I knew today would be a day to remember.