a glimpse into the life of rebbetzin rochel chalkowski portraits … · 2018-01-09 · rochel’s...

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18 portraits WOMEN OF DISTINCTION BINAH • NOVEMBER 27, 2006 he view from the steps, leading down to the cul-de- sac in front of the Jerusalem home of Rebbetzin Rochel Chalkowski, offers a breathtaking vista of a valley; the kever of Shmuel HaNavi sits on the horizon. The enchanting enclave, edged with waterfall-like green foliage dotted with wildflowers, is on the outskirts of Givat Shaul. The bright white of window and door shutters are accentuated by potted pink geraniums on the patio — a French village atmosphere prevails. Rochel, born in Paris, and Rabbi Moshe Chalkowski, shlita, born in England, have lived here since 1964; a peaceful retreat for this childless couple, who, from early morning until late into the night, give generously to Klal Yisrael. When I arrive at the front door, it’s ajar — a gesture of welcome. I knock. An Israeli-accented “Welcome” with a Parisian flavor invites me inside before Rochel appears from within to greet me. Her great height and regal presence impress me. Her crown is an aquamarine fine cotton headscarf. Her garments flow in soft tones of lilac, purple and gray. Tall Lofty in both stature and deed, Rochel’s chessed work for Klal Yisrael towers Heavenward, yet her demeanor remains modest and humble. In A Glimpse Into the Life of Rebbetzin Rochel Chalkowski A Role Model of Chessed Leah Kotkes T Market Machaneh Yehudah Inset: Kever Shmuel HaNavi

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Page 1: A Glimpse Into the Life of Rebbetzin Rochel Chalkowski portraits … · 2018-01-09 · Rochel’s mother was a widow for sixty years. “I never heard her complain.She was always

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he view from the steps,leading down to the cul-de-

sac in front of the Jerusalem home ofRebbetzin Rochel Chalkowski, offers abreathtaking vista of a valley; the keverof Shmuel HaNavi sits on the horizon.The enchanting enclave, edged withwaterfall-like green foliage dottedwith wildflowers, is on the outskirts ofGivat Shaul. The bright white ofwindow and door shutters areaccentuated by potted pink geraniumson the patio — a French villageatmosphere prevails.

Rochel, born in Paris, and RabbiMoshe Chalkowski, shlita, born inEngland, have lived here since 1964; apeaceful retreat for this childlesscouple, who, from early morning untillate into the night, give generously toKlal Yisrael.

When I arrive at the front door, it’sajar — a gesture of welcome. I knock.An Israeli-accented “Welcome” with aParisian flavor invites me inside beforeRochel appears from within to greetme. Her great height and regalpresence impress me. Her crown is anaquamarine fine cotton headscarf. Hergarments flow in soft tones of lilac,purple and gray. Tall Lofty in bothstature and deed, Rochel’s chessedwork for Klal Yisrael towersHeavenward, yet her demeanorremains modest and humble. In

A Glimpse Into the Life ofRebbetzin Rochel Chalkowski

A Role Model of Chessed

Leah Kotkes

T

Market Machaneh YehudahInset: Kever Shmuel HaNavi

Page 2: A Glimpse Into the Life of Rebbetzin Rochel Chalkowski portraits … · 2018-01-09 · Rochel’s mother was a widow for sixty years. “I never heard her complain.She was always

conversation, her pleasant voice iscrystal clear — she dialogues carefullycrafted, precise sentences, precise infact. She is a woman of detail, whoseinterests span historical Jerusalem tothe pressing needs of each person thatseeks her support today.

Until two years ago, Rochel was theHead Midwife at Shaari TzeddekHospital in Jerusalem, where sheworked for forty years. Her“retirement” has not affected the paceof her life — she continues to work atthe hospital twice a week and is quitebusy with other equally important,challenging tasks, of a chessedignature, especially with the BAMBItzedakah organization.

Rochel recalls coming to see thisapartment after she got engaged. “Itwas Sivan. The hills were green. Sheepgrazed outside that window.” We aresitting in the square-shaped livingroom, lined with sefarim and framedphotographs of contemporarytzaddikim of our generation. “I didn’tneed to go inside the apartment, Iknew we would live here — it was loveat first sight. It would be years untilmy dream of buying all our Shabbosprovisions in Givat Shaul was realized.I shopped at the open-air market,Machaneh Yehudah, for fish, chickenand vegetables, traveling back andforth by a primitive bus service,through olive tree-lined dirt roads.

“You can’t imagine what it was likein Jerusalem before the Six Day War —today it is a modern city; yesterday itwas a very small town.”

After graduating Shaarei Tzedeknursing school, Rochel fulfilled achildhood aspiration and became amidwife. She worked at the hospitalfor five years before she marriedMoshe Chalkowski, a close talmid ofHarav Shlomo Wolbe, zt”l, who was hisneighbor for 25 years.

The Chalkowskis are childless.However, this decree has not affectedtheir ability to ‘parent’ thousands ofchildren — mostly young women on aspiritual quest, students of NeveYerushalayim, where RabbiChalkowski is principal. “When I meetyoung girls ‘waiting’ to get married,they are usually bored and anxious. Iencourage them to do something withtheir life — to be active doingsomething meaningful. I may not have

been blessed with motherhood, but Inever sat around waiting for things tohappen in my life.”

Rochel’s mother was a widow forsixty years. “I never heard hercomplain. She was always busy doingsomething with her time. She neverpreached to me and my two siblings —we just saw how she did things. Thatwas enough to tell us what sheexpected of us and what our potentialcould be.”

Rochel’s avodah as a midwife hasallowed her to give to others in an all-encompassing way. “Every job aperson does can be infused withchessed. Chessed is a state of mind. Ibegan working as a midwife in the1960s — I grew with my job. When Istarted at Shaarei Tzedek, we had sixmidwives and eighty deliveries amonth. Today, we have sixty midwivesfor 900 monthly deliveries. Last night,on my eight-hour night shift, we hadtwenty-two births! That’s exciting!Jerusalem is no longer a big village.The population has swelled year afteryear and we have had to keep up withthe leaps in births.”

As the birthrate has increased, sohas the need to improve the midwiferyservice. “There was a time when thebirth was central to the relationshipbetween patient and midwife — albeita technical relationship. Over theyears, we have had to change ourapproach. I take on midwives whowould do their job even if they wonthe lottery — they love what they doand their love of their profession andpeople shines through at every stage

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Lofty in both stature and deed,Rochel’s chessed work for KlalYisrael towers Heavenward, yether demeanor remains modestand humble.

“I take on midwives who woulddo their job even if they won thelottery — they love what they doand their love of their profession

and people shines through atevery stage of the delivery

process.”

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of the delivery process. Today womenneed a more understanding andsympathic relationship with theirmidwife. I can say that 99% of our staffknows how to make patients feel calmand at peace with the labor process.Our goal is to ensure that the newmother comes out of the deliveryroom with a positive experience ofbirth and her relationship with thestaff — she shouldn’t feel afraid tocome back to the hospital and haveanother baby.”

Sometimes births do not proceedaccording to plan. “One year we hadtwo tradegedies within half a year,”recalls Rochel, whose face has takenon a serious expression. “When thishappens, it is also a trauma for mystaff. After these tragedies, I held astaff meeting in a private home. Iinvited a Rav to give the midwiveschizuk. The job of a midwife entailsmerit and emunah every step of theway.”

Every woman in Rochel’s life isbeloved by her like a daughter.Countless seminary girls have found aplace of understanding — and haveblossomed — under her loving care.“Rina* was a bas bayit by us for fifteenyears. She became ‘our’ daughter. Sheis now married to a talmid chacham andwe have two little lovely ‘grandsons’ —pure nachas. Many former students,even though they are already

grandmothers, are still consideredpart of our extended family.”

Thirty-three years ago, in 1973,when the Yom Kippur War began,Rochel Brodt Herz, a”h, a dear friend,and Rochel Chalkowski’s sister — whoboth lived in Switzerland — phonedher, wanting to do ‘something’ forIsrael. “I knew a family that neededhelp, so she sponsored them on amonthly basis. After the war, my friendwanted to continue her good deed.Hakadosh Baruch Hu has good soldiers.”

This one act of chessed — whichmushroomed over time — was theinspiration behind Rochel’s tzedakahorganization BAMBI — known asMatan B’Seter Bambi — which has five-hundred monthly beneficiaries, plus a

few hundred extra before Yom Tov andPurim. “These families get from $100each month, up to $1000. I travel tochutz la’Aretz two or three times a yearfor parlor meetings to raise funds forour organization that remains office-less — dedicated volunteers help mecoordinate our monthly obligations.”

The name for the tzedakahorganization BAMBI took itsinspiration from Rochel’s nursingschool days when a patient in thehospital nick-named each of the fournursing students named Rochel with adifferent endearing, distinguishingname — Bambi was his choice forRochel Chalkowski.

Today, BAMBI has an annual budgetof a one million dollars. It is co-ordinated by a New York committee ofprofessional ladies. In North America,Canada and some cities in Europe,BAMBI has thirty-five chapters withpeople devoting their time to helpingraise tzedakah.

What is the message Rochel deliverswhen she travels abroad? “That there’sreal poverty here in Eretz Yisrael — notevery Jew is wealthy or can manage.Most times, people I meet just can’tfathom what I am talking about. Theycan’t imagine what life would be likewithout social services — which arenon-existent in Eretz Yisrael. A youngcouple without any means of familysupport can struggle for life. A man

Every woman in Rochel’s life isbeloved by her like a daughter.

Countless seminary girls havefound a place of understanding

— and have blossomed — underher loving care.

“A man came to me only lastnight, crying so deeply, it broughttears to my eyes. All he had in thehouse was a can of tomato paste,which he had just taken to thegrocery store to exchange for aShabbos challah.”

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came to me only last night, crying sodeeply it brought tears to my eyes. Allhe had in the house was a can oftomato paste, which he had just takento the grocery store to exchange for aShabbos challah. Baruch Hashem, I wasable to help him.”

“Anyone can do a chessed. I recall ayoung avreich living in Tzfat who savedup a little money to buy three pumpsfor a gemach because he wanted to do achessed in his community. That youngman was Uri Lopiansky — the founderof Yad Sarah, who today is the mayor of

Jerusalem. From small acts of chessed,fruits of chessed grow.”

Panic-stricken parents come toRochel. No one is immune fromneeding help. “Last week, a motherknocked on my door at 11 p.m. Her sonhad contracted a particular conditionthat requires injections twice a month,and they didn’t have the $100 to payfor even one shot of the medication.Her pain was not extraordinary — thegovernment doesn’t pay for this life-giving medicine. Where was shesupposed to find the money everymonth? Baruch Hashem, BAMBI canhelp her. This is just one case ofhundreds that I deal with on a regularbasis.”

Has the Israeli governmentabandoned its people? “It probablyappears that way, but in reality they

probably don’t have funds foreverything,” Rochel says, shaking herhead, her eyes glazed with tears thatrefuse to fall. One has to be tough tosurvive in this world — one has to bestrong to ask for help. Sadly,desperation is usually the decidingfactor that drives a person to ask forfinancial aid.

“Wherever a person is, they can dochessed,” Rochel declares. She is anumber-one chessed coach. “A smile, agood word, taking an interest in

another person’s situation and givingchizuk — these are all acts of chessedevery person do. Start small and letthe chessed lead you to where you needto go. Last week I was delivering ababy, and after the birth thegrandmother excitedly tookphotographs of her first grandchild.Across the hall, a mother had justgiven birth to twins. She was so happy,but couldn’t get her camera to work. Icould feel her need to capture thisprecious moment and suggested tothe grandmother that she take aphotograph for this new mother withone twin cradled in each arm. “Withpleasure,” she agreed, and off she wentwith a smile to do a chessed. It was assimple as that.”

* Not her real name

B

“A smile, a good word, taking aninterest in another person’s

situation and giving chizuk –these are all acts of chessed

every person can do. Start smalland let the chessed lead you to

where you need to go.”